10 Tested Ways To Get Rid Of Your Irritating Girlfriend (Relationship Humor)

We haven’t had a smile break in a while…

Here’s a really funny article that was recommended by one of our good friends at www.loverslawn.com.

"10 Tested Ways To Get Rid Of Your Irritating Girlfriend"

For an irritating girlfriend-free life follow these time-tested formula and you’ll be surprised to see how easy and relatively straightforward dumping an irritating ‘attachment’ can actually be!

1:) Make her wait for ages… when the dates are planned by her and, even worse when they are planned by you.

2:) Do not ever use a deodorant when you’re around her. Make it a point to munch on onions before you meet her.

3:) Attend as many calls as you can when she’s spending time with you… it helps if the one calling is you’re ex-girlfriend and it’s even better if it’s your ’supposedly’ intimate boyfriend.

4:) Be as GAY as you can!

5:) Make sure you invite her best friend every time you go out with her, and hit on her friend (doesn’t matter if it’s a guy or a girl) as shamelessly as you can. The drool-pot is a sure winner!

6:) Dress as horrendously as you possible can. Colour combinations are a strict NO-NO, unless you’re planning on doing a fluorescent orange and bright pink combo. Classic!

7:) Gorge yourself on food, hers, yours, her friend’s and make sure food spills out of your mouth every minute or so, during your lunch or dinner dates.

8:) BURP! As often and as loudly as you can. Gaseous emanations of other kinds are also sure ways to your ultimate triumph!

9:) Make sure she realises you’re not busy, but pretend to be as busy as you can possibly be when she’s around… she’ll get the hint… or even better, pair it up with being a schedule freak.

10:) Pretend you have a serious crotch infection, or a fetish or an obsession for everything down under!

 

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Dan and Jennifer are the Founders and Senior Editors of AskDanAndJennifer.com, which has been called "the best and most popular Love and Sex advice column on the Internet today". Their videos are some of the most popular videos on YouTube. Don't forget to ask your dating, love, and sex questions in the Ask Dan and Jennifer - Love, & Sex Forums. You should Fan Dan & Jennifer on Facebook and Follow them on Twitter!

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