Oooh! Yes, something I can relate to!
James, coming out process is something really difficult for us, as well as it is going to be for your parents. There are many things that may happen, and well, you can judge them from your backround.
Now, let me ask you a question. Do you feel comfortable with your sexuality? Do you feel like you love yourself and you accept yourself? If the answer is yes, well you already overcame the worst part of all (Believe me, I *KNOW* about that. it is haaaaard!)
Then, when you come out to yourparents, try not to do it in a hard way, or out of nowhere. Odds are that your parents and close family (like siblings) may already have an idea.
There will be some stages that they will go through: the Stages of Grief. This are five and may last a couple of hours, days, or even years. That's why before coming out to your parents you should be comfortable with yourself. first, they will feel rejection, which is normal.
First Stage: Denial
This first stage happens immediately. People can express themselves as "shocked." "I had no idea..." "This can't be."
Second Stage: Anger
The second stage is a downer for those coming out. Once the trauma of coming out is over, and you think the coast is clear, the parent/wife enters the anger stage. How much anger, when they enter, and when they get over this stage is dependent of many factors.
Stage 3: Bargaining
Bargaining is usually a welcomed respite from the Anger Stage. But, it can be equally annoying.
Stage Four: Depression
This stage occurs when the preceding stages did not alleviate the grief, and the loss is not yet accepted. It is the brain's last-ditch attempt at not accepting the truth.
Stage Five: Acceptance
At long last, we reach the final stage of acceptance. If achieved, depression lifts and anger subsides. This doesn't mean that we forget the sadness and anger, it means we don't feel it anymore.
I invite you to look at the options you have and consider if you're emotionally prepared for it. If you choose to tell your parents, you need to remember that they love you and that they will accept you the way you are. they might just need time.
If D&J allows me to (hehe), I might recoomend visiting this forum:
Empty Closets - Powered by vBulletin
This is a forum for the LGBT (Lesbian, Gay, bisexual and Transgendered) community, mostly for teenagers. You can find lots of infirmation, help, advice, and a lot of more stuff about this specific topic there.
(my username is Quitex if you want to contact me there)
I hope everything goes well, and if you ever need more advice, we're here for help.
-Jean
PS. Thanks Dan for redirecting my nose to this thread
