I think you make a key point when you say you can't go on with this problem. If this is something you aren't prepared to live with the rest of your life then you dont' have any business getting married.
"Paid sex", even with protection, carries some risk of infection. You have absolutely no right to expose her to this risk without her knowledge and consent. Doing so would be cowardly and underhanded. If you're going to go that route, then be a man and tell her. She has a right to know what risk she's being exposed to.
Another thing that is apparent is that you need to fire your doctor. If he isn't willing to talk about your concerns, time to find someone who is. I don't care if he's been your family doctor for three generations. It's time to find someone who will listen to you.
The proper course of action, if he wasn't comfortable dealing with the issue, would be to refer you so someone who is trained in that area.
If the two of you marry with this issue unresolved, you'll never see your fifth anniversary. Sexual incompatibility is a major cause of divorce. The two of you are running right past the warning signs at warp speed. Time to slow down and reassess the situation. If this isn't something you can live with, you need to make darn sure the problem has been resolved before the two of you commit to a life together. I think the two of you need to get with a relationship counselor with training in sexual problems immediately.
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