The first thing you need to do is build a support network of friends who will help you through this. You need to tell them that you have been involved in a very toxic relationship and you need help to keep you from getting in touch with him. Make sure these are assertive friends who will tell you "don't do it."
I have never seen a relationship that started in deception end in anything but pain for everyone involved. The married guy doesn't care about you and he probably doesn't care about anyone but himself. The sad truth here is he's using you to meet his needs. I'm sorry to be so blunt, but you need people around you to tell you what's real, not what you want to hear. The only honorable thing to do here is to break off contact with him totally and permanently. A wound can't heal if you keep tearing it open by talking to him. You're not the first young woman to be roped into a situation like this. Actually, you're probably not the first he has roped into this situation. You've got a player on your hands.
Regarding your current boyfriend, I think you have to judge that relationship on it's own merit. Right now, you're comparing him to the married guy and he's coming up short. Time to start looking at that relationship for what it is, for good or bad. Above all, have honor and don't be going behind his back to talk to this last player. Your current guy deserves better than that.
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