[victoria]

i know. i've decided not to break any more rules and if something makes me uncomfortable then its a no and that's the end of it. thanks a lot guys i was really distressed. mostly because when i experienced what he called "the rush" i felt like i had lost control of myself. ive never felt anything so strong. i think i was scared of myself mostly and that i could feel such a strong response to something so simple.
btw please tell me if that makes any sense.

i dont feel scared of im or when i'm chatting with him. actually i realized that i've smiled a lot more when i've been chatting with him than with my friends.
but i will be careful and keep you all posted on whats happening that way i can have other give me the heads up in case i do something stupid again.

btw instead of speaking with him i sent a message, forgot to mention that before and i actually tried to intimidate him in the message. today we spoke briefly and i sent him the picture he asked for that i promised i would send since as i said i have plenty of pics on my facebook and i always keep my promises. he said i looked nice and thanked me. i apologized for being rude (my message was a bit sassy) and for trying to intimidate him. (okay so maybe a little more than sassy. i guess it was my form of rebelling) he didnt get upset about me trying to intimidate him though. does anyone understand why he reacted like that? because i dont. i figure i'll ask but i want your take on it please.

so my questions are: does what i said about my 'rush-ing' (or what ever you call it) and how i scared myself because of it make sense? and does anyone get why he didnt get upset at my trying to intimidate him? oh and can someone explain this rush thing a little more for me? i still don't get how one sentence could make me have such intense feelings. thanks again everyone i really appreciate all of your help with this.