[CKDK]

I am 26 years old and gay. That's the easy part to admit for me.

I have a serious problem however, and that is... well. It's not a matter of low sex drive as a case of NO sex drive. Whatever my boyfriend does, I can't seem to get in the mood for anything intimate. I avoid the issue of sex like the plague, and when he tries to bring up the topic I immediately think "Oh, I must do the dishes" or "I wonder if I put the washing machine on?" - any excuse.

It really hasn't been a case of being straight - I've always found guys more attractive, ever since I can remember (In my teens, Brad and Jen. Whereas other boys were drooling over Jen, I was drooling over Brad). But sex is just the bridge I have been struggling with. It will be my "first time", but shouldn't I be wanting to break down that particular door? Why do I keep trying to avoid it.

Is there something wrong with me, and is there anything I can do to prepare myself for the biggest moment of my life so far? My boyfriend has been really understanding to now, but we're four months into a relationship and he wants sex - and he's making it clear that if I'm not ready he's going elsewhere.

Am I a coward? Are there any tips on getting me ready?

Your thoughts would be appreciated.

Cowardly in England,
CKDK.