Rayro:
First off, I want to commend you for your maturity. You write as if you were far older than you are. Its refreshing.
Now, I'm somewhat in a similar situation except I'm her. I broke up with my boyfriend about 3 weeks ago and I'm miserable. I love him dearly. I've cried until I can't cry anymore, I've tried everything to try and focus on other things but its impossible to get him out of my head. The first thing that comes to mind when I wake up is him. Its horrible!
Let me give you a little background on our relationship and then I hope I can give you an answer to your dilema.
We had been dating for 2 1/2 wonderful years. There were issues in our relationship that needed working out and we tried to work them out. I think I had issues with him more than he had with me.
Anyway, I over reacted one day and broke up with him. This is how: I pretended like everything was okay and then after he left for a meeting, I packed up ALL my stuff and left (No I didn't live with him but had a closet and drawers with my clothes and belongings). I also knew that he would be calling me when he was on his way back to see if I needed anything so I forwarded my cell phone (we only used our cell phones) to a number I knew was not in service. (I once told him that when I met a guy and he turned me off, I would purposly forward my phone to a disconnected number for a day or two so the guy wouldn't call me anymore - this of course was when I was dating before him).
Well, 3 weeks have passed and I haven't heard from him. I have friends that tell me, call him. Try and talk to him. But I feel like I made a statement by doing what I did and if he really truly loved me, he would come looking for me. Also, I am a firm believer that men should pursue women, not the other way around.
I wish he would call me and tell me that he loves me and that he wants to work it out. I wouldn't think twice. I would be there.
As I was reading both your posts, you kind of reminded me of him. Mr. Cool and Collected. He too only had casual relationships before me. He even told me not to long ago that he felt that God was going to punish him for how he treated women. That now that he wants to settle down, that's when he's going to get hurt. I don't really know what he meant by that. He wanted to settle down with me or just settle down???
Sorry, I'm going in a different direction. I guess what I am trying to say to you is that if that is the woman that you want to be with, you need to go looking for her and talk to her before its too late. If she feels like I do then she will never come back to you, she'll be waiting for you to come back to her. Am I making any sense? I hope so because the if it was mean to be, it will be theory you have going doesn't always work that way. Someone has to be the one to make the first move.
You don't have anything to loose and much to gain. I wish I was in her position and he felt for me as you feel for her.
Good luck. Please keep me/us posted.
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