Is it cheating?

[Paul in uk]

Im a married man of 47 and to be honest dont have a lot of sex with my wife, I love her loads and always will, but over the past 3 years or more i have been meeting other men and having sex with them and i love it.
I dont have anul sex with them, just wanking and sucking,i get really turned on by this and cant stop doing it (i want to but cant) i dont know how to stop.
I think my wife and i last had sex in june this year 2008.
Please can u help me and tell me what can i do, do you think im cheating on her? i dont feel guilty after i have met up with another man,is it really classed as cheating because its with the same sex?

[Cocky]

It is cheating.

Just because you're doing it with guys and you don't consider yourself gay (I assume), doesn't make it invalid.

You are going behind your wife's back and sleeping around - that's breaking her trust in you. If she found out, she'd be devastated no matter the sex.

I'm guessing you don't feel guilty because you've made up your mind that it doesn't count as cheating.

I don't know your situation and what caused you and your wife to stop having sex, so I can't really give you any advice about that. I think your trysts will manifest themselves eventually. Everything comes out in time.

From how I see it, you could either continue on with your secret life, or tell your wife about it. It's up to you.

[fawkse]

yes, you are cheating.
now, to make it not cheating either stop, or tell your wife.
i wish there was a way to break this easily, but i think you are in for a real nightmare. she's not going to like the idea of you having other sex partners. if she is rigid in her morals, she may even have a harder time knowing that you are having sex with other men.