Why do they always break up with me?

[Maria]

I am a 36 years old women, living in an european town. I have been single (with short interruptions) for the last 4 years. I would like to have a serious and long lasting relationship again.
I don't have a problem in meeting men - also in the active part. I went out with a lot of men in the last years. With some of them I had a short relationship or affair, but after a few weeks or months it always ends. Most of the time they break up with me. Often when I don't expect it - after they have showed a lot of emotions or commitment. I have made this experience with all kind of men. Sometimes I was really madly in love or with nice guys that my girlfriends approved before as good candidates. When I ask them about the reasons - I don't get any answer - or a "I'm not into you". What I don't understand is their enthusiasm first and then the break-up after a short time. barely enough time to get each other to know.

[H.dutch]

wat i think is that the guy is saying wat he wants u to hear. i think so he tells u the things that u wanna hear so u fall for him while he is trying to figure out if he truely means it or ever wills and i guess in the end they dont. that is the only explination i could think of though i am not an expert but i have seen it happen where a guy tells the girl how much he likes her and thinks there great for each other and left 3 weeks later.

[FemaleOrgasm]

If some pulls away from you physically or psychologically, then pull away just a little bit more. Don't lean in.

Make men want you by playing hard to get.

[Maria]

Thanks for the answers. Can be something true in it. What H.dutch describes is the strategy I follow when I apply for a new job or an appartment. Little bit strange to use it in relationships. It makes me feel insecure and leaves these questions: What have I done wrong? When did it go wrong? Don't you owe somebody you have been close to a little bit more of an explanation?
Just have to add that I don't think it was only telling "what I wanted to hear". I know the difference between a man who wants to impress and a man who is really beeing involved. I'm sure they were.
I have tried both beeing clingy and played hard to get - with no big sucess. Mostly we loose contact and when we meet by surprise they are not relaxed and sometimes it seems like they are not "over it" or they are still interested. When I try to transform the relation in a friendship (after some time) it doesn't work.
I just don't get it why they don't stick in the "relation" a little bit longer. And find out if it could be something for real.

[MIMI]

Men and women are not like they use to be. Most are looking for a quick fix. That fix maylast anywhere from a couple of days to a few months. Then there are the long drawn out fix that last years but takes you through so much pain. i think we as people get bored more quickly now. There is too much eye candy walking around to want just one. Not ny preference but how it is. I think women amd men go after just what they want. Once they get it they out to find a different subject to see what it has to offer. You put yourself out there in hopes of something real. Men and women will tell you just what you want to hear and that will be that. you either the sucker or takn as the sucker. Do not put all of you out there.