14 years and never had a girlfriend:'(

[Dogukan]

Hey there,
I'm 14 years old and I never had a girlfriend. I'm not shy or stuff like that but I'm mostly like, nah not her, even if I like her or if she is attractive to me. I can't figuere out why...
I would be glad, if u gave some tips or explanations.

P.S: I'm sure that I'm not gay.

[jeanintro*quitex]

Well, you're 14, don't rush it!
My only advice (and I am not too experienced on the dating stuff anyways) is that there is enough time for having a relationship. However, if you want to start right away, I advice to join clubs, meet people, and be confident.
Most of the times, when we're not sure about someone even though she may be attractive or hot (or similar adjectives :P) and we're afraid to give the first step it may be a matter of self confidence. Perhaps you can't give the first step because you're afraid to a 'no' or to be 'used'.
Talk with someone about thism, aybe your dad or your mom (/PS your dad may be a better idea) and he may be able to give you some advice too.

But my first advice is: Don't rush it! There is pleeenty of time.
Good luck!
-Jean

[Dogukan]

Thank you

[~Amanda~]

Yeah. I really wouldn't worry about. It's pretty normal to not have a girlfriend at fourteen. I didn't really start dating until I was fifteen and I'm still quite picky about who I date now. hehe

[LostInEternity]

You have plenty of time for dating for sure but the best advice I can give you from guy to guy is these 6 simple things!
1.Treat her as you want to be treated (If you listen to her she'll listen to you, etc.)
2.Confidence is key (Knowing who you are and standing up for what you believe in is a good way to catch her attention) that said confidence and having an overinflated ego will get you two whole different effect!
3.Honesty is the best policy ( A relationship built on lies will always fail! )
4.Eye contact and a general interest in what makes her unique!
5.When your with her, Let everything else fade to black! ( In other words make her feel like she's the only one that exists in your world! )
6.Small Tokens of affection to show her she's with you when shes not around ( Any good girl / woman will appreciate the time invested over what you can buy her! )
I hope that helps you out some man

[Browneyedboy]

I find confidence is huge when trying to talk to a girl or even when dating a girl. Maybe you are thinking these things because you aren't ready to date yet? You are still way young and you have a lot of time ahead of you. You are 8th grade now? Or a Freshmen? If you are a Freshmen, things are bound to happen, fast. There are many good girls out there, just find one you like and see what happens. At your age, relationships go fast and I found myself finding another girl often. If you don't want this, then wait to find the right girl.

[Spar]

Nothing wrong with that. I actually know people who didn't date until they were 19 years old! Your problem is similar to a problem I used to have: you're overthinking it. Just relax and make some friends. Make a friend who is a girl yet don't become a best friend type or that's all she'll ever see you as. You can't just pick someone because of looks, you have to get to know them first, and don't just date because it seems like everyone else is. If you get into a relationship were you don't really love the other person then end it early and as easily as possible because the longer it goes on, the harder it becomes to break up (for her especially it will hurt). Just think, even though it's rare, your first girlfriend could be your only girlfriend if you're extremely lucky and you will love each other for all your life.
Don't date because your in high school or whatever or because your friends are. You don't date ever, you look for someone you could spend the rest of your life with happily!
Good luck and don't sweat it.
I'm 16 and have my first girlfriend now and am mad in love with her (she doesn't know how much yet) and I'm sure she at least likes me enough back that she doesn't think about other guys in the sense of wanting them. Call it love or infatuation (why can't some people just let me say it's both) but when you want to be with someone 24/7 and do not just think of them because they look gorgeous it's what I think love is!

[Max]

Originally Posted by Spar

Nothing wrong with that. I actually know people who didn't date until they were 19 years old! Your problem is similar to a problem I used to have: you're overthinking it. Just relax and make some friends. Make a friend who is a girl yet don't become a best friend type or that's all she'll ever see you as. You can't just pick someone because of looks, you have to get to know them first, and don't just date because it seems like everyone else is. If you get into a relationship were you don't really love the other person then end it early and as easily as possible because the longer it goes on, the harder it becomes to break up (for her especially it will hurt). Just think, even though it's rare, your first girlfriend could be your only girlfriend if you're extremely lucky and you will love each other for all your life.
Don't date because your in high school or whatever or because your friends are. You don't date ever, you look for someone you could spend the rest of your life with happily!
Good luck and don't sweat it.
I'm 16 and have my first girlfriend now and am mad in love with her (she doesn't know how much yet) and I'm sure she at least likes me enough back that she doesn't think about other guys in the sense of wanting them. Call it love or infatuation (why can't some people just let me say it's both) but when you want to be with someone 24/7 and do not just think of them because they look gorgeous it's what I think love is!

Very well put my friend, and I am the type of guy who is 19, in University, and still has never had a girlfriend, I do not believe that there is something wrong with me, I guess I just had too many things going on in my life.

Dude, just relax, and you will find someone. This site is great for getting tips and whatever. Hopefully I can get with this girl that I really like, I am so nervous, even though I should not be, probably because I fear rejection... no clue... BUT! Just keep at it, AND NEVER THINK THAT THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU! You are still young, I felt just the way you did when I was 14 and I tend to laugh at those days... lol... If you think that it cannot work because you have something wrong with you, just remember... there is nothing wrong with you, and everything should be fine

Good Luck
MaxS.

[GeekyJenn]

Seriously, 14 is no big deal! I didn't have my first boyfriend until i was 16! and only really had 3 boyfriends in high school... and didn't really date anyone serious until like my second year of college. Trust me, I wouldn't even worry about dating at 14! I am pretty sure the guy who just broke up with me didn't have his first girlfriend until his 20s. So believe me, you are totally fine!

Don't rush it and keep up with your School work!