long story needs quick answer

[Mr.M]

well, my friends rushed kind of blind date on me (online talking kind of thing). My best friend D knows I want a girl friend, and his girl friend Jessica knows too. D's sister really likes me, and I like her too, to be honest she is the perfect girl, but I'm more into a physical relationship and I don't want to her to make a choice over me, to move to NC or stay in New York. (she visits every summer) so... I love this girl, but the things stopping me are: she is my best friends sister, I don't want to feel responsible for her making a life choice over me (because, I'm not sure how long the relationship will last), and I want to at the top of our relationship to "do it". I cant say no because I don't want to have my friends hate me, and hurt his sister's feelings. but I... just can't say yes, I have never had a girl friend and I can't have the guilt of ruining her life over me. If it was not for her being my friends sister and she lived in NY for most of the time, i would date her... I'm thinking the best thing to do is just say no and exactly say "its down to true love, I could not hurt your feelings, or ruin your life in anyway", ... so please help...

[Marcie in Massachusetts]

I feel for you! I'm in a long distance relationship (soon to be a regular 'close distance relationship' he's moving up here) and have experienced these feelings too. What I would first suggest, if you aren't already doing so, is talk to this girl; be open and honest about your feelings, thoughts, concerns, fears, and also it will help make sure you guys are on the same page. Communication will solve so many problems. I don't think you will ruin her life, think about it, worst comes to worst(which I hope it wouldn't) she moves back to New York. You say you're also afraid because you don't know how long it would last. Well, you'll really never know if you don't give it a shot! No one starts a relationship knowing if it'll last or not (we aren't psychic). You have to try it out! Overall, don't let your fears take over you. Do you want to wonder 10 years from now where she is and what she's doing, and regret not giving it a shot? Basically jump into it with enthusiasm and energy, don't let love slip threw your hands because of doubts and fears. Of course, this is just my opinion and how I would handle the situation. Whatever happens I hope you end up happy