this girl i met

[what_the]

hey im dave 23. new to this whole thing. But i need help on this one. iv met this girl off an online dating site. we have seen eachother a couple times now and talk on the phone everyday. she has mentioned about her ex cheating on her and they have been broking up for a year now. Now it seems that she likes me cuz of the singles that she gives me. now i know its hard for her to trust guys now cuz of her ex. but im starting to really like her and i dont wanna rush things and screw it up. but i also dont want to wait to long and be only a friend. cuz that has happen to me befor. whats should i do?

[Dan And Jennifer]

Hi Dave,

First, we all have our own issues for our partners to deal with, often referred to as "baggage" - not a pretty word but a common one - we all have our unique set of "special gifts". LOL

She needs to get to know you for who you are, even though she has issues around this area. But until she really knows and trusts you, you'll have to ride a fine line - to show her that you are NOT cheating on her, whereas dating someone that hasn't been cheated on you wouldn't have to worry about it.

This means calling her, telling her in detail why you're going to be late if you are late one day (before it happens, not after), etc. It's just part of the package for getting close to someone that's been cheated on.

And get to know each other sooner instead of later. Get off the phone, and spend more time in person doing stuff, so you actually get to know each other for who you are. Make the "together" time be "in person" time. Otherwise you'll always be her toll free relationship help line.

If you stay distant now, you'll always be distant, until of course she gets a guy as her new "boyfriend". Take action right away to bridge the gap between you two.