How do I help my girlfriend get over her ex?

[Beagle]

Guy, what you are doing is giving her emotional support and enabling her to continue this dysfunctional relationship.

[Beagle]

That wasn't the part I was wanting you to see. It's when we fall all over ourselves trying to please a woman so she'll like us. See, I've done what you're doing. That's one of those situations where

Good judgment comes from experience and experience comes from bad judgment.

I realize now that what I was actually doing was enabling the girl to continue the dysfunctional relationship by providing emotional support. That's not what you want to hear, but that's the way it is. She's using your emotional support to help her pursue this guy. That's wrong for both of you. I've seen my female friends do this to guys, and I've had girls do this to my male friends. You need to stop propping her up while she pursues this hopeless relationship.

I doubt what I'm saying is going to make a difference now. I hope you think of it on your next relationship, though.

[kkubena]

I haven't changed for her to like me at all.

[kkubena]

Now she tells me that she feels like he is more like her bestfriend. She just needs a little time to be single and alone since she wasn't single very long after they broke up.

[kkubena]

I mean really if it was going to work between them would he have broke up with her and told her that it was her, and he didn't want to be with her....?

She told him last night that she knew they wouldn't ever have another chance, and he said I didn't say that.

So do you think it's never going to work with him? What do you think? Will she get over this and be happy with me again but not be thinking of him.

She said if he would tell her that they aren't going to be anything but friend then she would be fine and be able to move on.

[Beagle]

I don't know. Ultimately, accepting disrespect dooms a relationship. She may decide you're the one she wants to see. But, that's after she get's over him.

Right now, if the two of you hook up, you're "Rebound man." Those never work out. I've tried that one to.

Actually, a lot of my posts are "I've done this. Don't do it."

[kkubena]

I have sit her and talked to her eye to eye and she wants to move on, she just wants to be totally over him. She said talking to him has helped, and she tells me that she doesn't want to lose me.

Okay, one night we were talking on the phone and she just starts to cry. I said sweetie whats wrong, she said "i'm falling in love with you" in such a sincere way. She said I didn't know I could be feeling this again and i'm so scared. I promised her that I would never leave her, and she has done so much for me. Neither one of has changed for us to like eachother more, I think she just got scared and felt like "is it okay to move on?" Do you get what i'm saying?

[kkubena]

I know this may not be fair to me but after all the relationships i've been through none have been like this. I was in one for a little over 3 years and I never felt like this one time. This girl means to much to me to just give up and move on cause I really can't, I just have to sit back I guess and let things be the way they are meant to be. In the pieces of my heart that I have I know I am the one she wants she just has to really get over him. I gave her 99% of my heart, she has it now...it's a little crumbly right now but I trusted her enough to give it to her like I had no one else so I can trust her now not to smash it.

[FemaleOrgasm]

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[kkubena]

Thank you for everyones answers!

I got one of my friends thats a girl to come have dinner with me tonight and my phone rang...it was her (the girl). She was all mad and stuff, I was like you wanted to be just friends until you could figure everything out, you wanted this, not me!

Then she cried and went on to say "i'm so confused, I want to be with you so bad I just can't figure out why I can't get over him". "I just am so jelous of other girls seeing you, I don't want to be without you but I feel it's wrong to be with you and still think of him sometimes."

What should she do? Does anyone have any sugestions? I don't know how to help her.?