Long Distance Love

[Pat]

Hey
I met an exchange student from Japan this year and we fell in love...now going into this relationship I realized the entire time that she would leave eventually and I really just didnt want it to end but it did...right before she left we discussed what we were going to do once she leaves...we agreed that we should end the relationship because we have both had experience with bad long distance relationships and we didnt want our relationship to turn badly...we agreed that we should end it while we still loved each other so that doesnt change...the problem really is that I do still love her and I want to be with her and she has already promised to come back soon to see me...whenever we talk to each other we tell each other that we love eachother and it really is like we didnt break up...I just want to know what I should do about this

[Rachael559]

Wow Pat, that really is a tough call. You're dealing with not just a long-distance relationship but one from outside the country, and one which has a very different cultural basis. The good news I think is that many many relationships have managed to overcome these things. But the key is communication. It sounds like you didn't really break-up, and I think it's going to be hard when or if one of you meets someone else in your home country. Have you said to her though, this feels like we haven't really broken up and I feel like either A) we really do need to let each other go or B) we really need to work on a definite goal when one of us can make the move so we can be together. I am wondering because in this case it will make a very big deal, you said she's an exchange student do you mean for High School or College? How old are the two of you? If you are both in college I don't see why you can't find a way to go there for awhile or she can't find a way to come back here? If you are in high school obviously then you may need to let this go for now. You can try staying friends, and at some point in the future when you have a little more freedom, you can try finding ways to come together again. But no matter what you have to be honest with her about how you're feeling and work from there, as I keep saying
"GO COMMUNICATION!!""
and Good Luck, let me know how it's going,
Rachael

[nea in cali]

yeah man same here i have a longdistance relationship question
well ive been dating this guy for 4 months now his a wonderful man im starting to fall for him but its getn kinda scary for me... i dont want to get my heartbroken.
At first we chated everyday or every other day but now we talk every 4 days or at the weekends... is this a sign that he doesnt want me anymore?... im getn antsy and frustrated though he said that his comming over in december... sometimes i feel like going to visit him but dont have the funds to do so... help please?!?