how do i keep a clean butt? probably the grossest thread ever but a question i need answered.

[yesvirginia]

okay, so needless to say I'm gay, but i thought this question was more appropriate here because its disgusting and knitty gritty, but its something i need answered in fear of horribly embarrassing myself when i have anal sex for the first time. which has yet to happen.

so here's my question, and might as well cut to chase and not try to make it sound pretty. cuz its not.

How do I have anal sex without getting shit everywhere?! I have a dildo, and I enjoy playing with it. Basically every time though it turns into a big mess, and i figure I must be doing something wrong. I start by umm... having a bowel movement, and then I enema with warm-ish water (could I be using too much?) until it comes out relatively clear. then i lube up the dildo and go to work. its fine when i put it in, but when i take it out disgusting brown liquid comes out.

Assuming some day a real live man decides to put his penis up there, I would very much prefer this not happening for hopefully obvious reasons. Please help!

[Rev. Mac]

Hi Yes,
Yeah, shit happens. But there are a few ways around this especially if you are preparing rather for masturbation or sex.

Laxatives are really good to use if you know later in the evening you plan on having some "dirty fun". Also you have the right idea with the enema, just be careful you can clean TOO MUCH. Not only are you washing the unwanted excrement away, you are also washing away your natural mucus which can make things a tad more sensitive down there, and not in a good way. You could also try being aware of what you are eating before you have fun. It also may not be a bad idea to try getting a colonic, I hear they feel pretty neat. Other than that just know that most gay, straight, or otherwise guys and girls know it can get dirty back there and seeing a little bit of dookie every now and then is expected. Hope this helped.

Have Fun