virgin needs tips/answers

[minimaterix]

hi im a 16 yr old male who is ready to have sex with my girlfriend.
I heard sex with a condom is bad but im scared of getting my girlfriend pregnant if i dont use one.
also my girlfriend is also a virgin i understand it will hurt her alot is there any tips i can get pleasee? :S

[Purplebear]

I'm a virgin, too, but I think I can answer both of your questions accurately.
If you don't want to get your girlfriend pregnant, you must rely on some form of birth control. I've heard different things about condoms. Some people say there's no difference and some guys say it's awful. You have a lot of different options with condoms though. There are a lot of different kinds and some will definitely feel better than others. You just have to explore. If you're not comfortable with a condom, ask her if she's comfortable going on the pill and taking it regularly. There are MANY birth control options available to you and your girlfriend besides condoms and pills.
Keep in mind that NOTHING is 100% effective when it comes to preventing pregnancy.

As for hurting your girlfriend, it will probably happen. But it really depends on her prior experience. Even if she's a virgin, she may have had something else break her hymen. If she uses sex toys or dildos or anything that she uses internally, in her vagina, it might be already broken. By a certain age, the hymen just kid of wears away. Since you're 16, I'm assuming she's around your age and, again, depending what kind of stuff has been up there, her hymen may or may not be already broken.
To minimize her pain, which is really considerate of you to be thinking about, DON'T penetrate her until she's very wet. Consider buying some lube while you're out getting birth control. I've been fingered and nothing feels good unless it's slippery. You have to make sure she wants it. Make her feel completely comfortable. Good communication is key here. She needs to be open with you to tell you what feels good and what hurts. Just keep asking her questions before you change your pace and your depth when the time comes.

I hope you remember to have safe and considerate sex!

[Exavion]

If you do not use a condom, the risk of getting an STD and/or her pregnant is greatly increased, so please; do use one! Also, you should ask if she'd be okay with taking the pill too. That way the odds of getting her pregnant are practically non-existent.

Also, for the first time, sex does hurt for a girl, but I don't think it should be anything too bad. Don't worry, it's supposed to be a really intimate and enjoyable experience, and you'll get better at it the more you do it.

[Dan And Jennifer]

Originally Posted by minimaterix

I heard sex with a condom is bad :S

Minimaterix,

This whole idea that sex with a condom is somehow "bad" is a myth, plain and simple. Please, please don't buy into it.

I'm 30 years old and I can honestly tell you that the first few times I had sex one of the last things I could have possibly worried about was whether the sensation could have been enhanced ever so slightly by NOT wearing protection. My biggest concern was which condom was the safest!

Where this type of a rumor gets started, is usually one of those showoff, grandstanding, trash talking things that macho guys like to engage in sometimes to show off and pretend they have "more game" than their friends. Of course those who talk the loudest tend to have the most to cover up. lol

For a virgin, the first time will be very special, a experience that you'll enjoy just as much with or without a condom. Seriously, with all the new / foreign sensations, you're pretty unlikely to even know the difference.

Most guys will have sex so, so many times in their adult lives, that they will have plenty of time to try all kinds of variations. Leave the other variations for later - it's just not worth it to take that kind of risks especially your first time.

While later on you may eventually determine which you prefer (with or without), sex without a condom is very dangerous and really, really not worth the risk - think STDs and babies!

There is no such thing as absolutely security or protection, it's not possible. But there is a concept called a "multi layered defense". Condoms are x% effective. Birth control pills are x% effective (at preventing pregnancy anyway). Put them together as a layered defense and you're way safer than you were before. See what I mean?

But whatever you do, don't go at it with no protection because of what some guys said, please.

Here are two videos you may find helpful, check them out...

Unprotected Sex - Did He Pull Out Fast Enough?

Safe Sex: Can That Clear Fluid Really Get Me Pregnant?

Dan

[RingoD]

A condom use is really the most important, we also advise each.

[K. in Cleveland]

As Dan said, for your first time you're not likely to feel a difference. The only thing that could possibly be bad from wearing a condom is if either of you are allergic to latex (which you'd most likely know by now, from doctor's visits and such) in which case there are safe alternatives. There's also his, hers, and shared pleasure condoms. Oh, and don't try to showboat and get a "Magnum" if it's not really that big... the right size=best protection. Oh, and you don't need to "double bag it" or anything. The best practice is no glove no love. Oh, and if the condom starts to come off or pulls up, don't just readjust it.. get a new one on.
If you don't want to use a condom, your best bet is your hand.

Have fun and stay safe!

[emziee90]

ypu should really use a condom if it is your first time even tho you are still virgins but you don't relly want to ge ther pregnant