i am a virgin help!!!!

[bec599]

my boyfriend has had sex before and i havent but he wont have sex with me how do i get him to want to???

[K. in Cleveland]

First off, I hope I'm not making an incorrect assumption here, but I'm thinking you're a teenager. While this in of itself doesn't mean that you can't or shouldn't have sex, it's just... well, why the urgency to do it? Yes, sex can be fun and a great way to enjoy each other, but it can also be something with a lot of emotions and other baggage that you really don't want. You have to ask yourself why you want to have sex. Is it because you feel you love your boyfriend and want to show him? Is it because 'everyone else is doing it'? Do you just want to be close to someone? The biggest incorrect idea about sex is that sex = love or love = sex. This is not true at all. Yes, people who love each other have sex, but I'd venture to say that a good percentage, if not the majority, of sex that's being had, is casual...
If you want to be close to someone, yes, sex can do that, but there are other ways too... like talking, sharing, and good old fashioned dating someone.

If you're looking for something to feel good, again, yes sex can do that. But chances are that you'd have a lot more fun masturbating than having sex with a guy for the first time. Interesting factoid: most women achieve their first orgasm through masturbation.

OK.. now I'm done with that part. As far as him not wanting to have sex with you, did he say why? Maybe he doesn't want to hurt you, or he is just being respectful of you and wants you to be sure this is something you wanna do. Sometimes when a person looses their virginity they question it afterwards and beat themselves up, saying they wish they hadn't done it etc etc...

Talk with him, but first, look inside yourself and ask yourself why you wanna do it.