Getting my wife to open up to the idea of swinging

[vannievan]

Little Background information first:
We have been together for almost 7years, on a couple of times I have hinted to a 3some, now she didn't say no, she did tell me her pref and also the ground rules, no kissing no penetration that kind of rules she made.
This was twice that she told me this.
Now how and where to go from here, i have been involved in a mmf 3some before, it was great not just for me but for my friends gf aswell, I must say to me it is more important that she experiance the ultimate pleasure.
She has a friend that did say she wants to goto a swing club, now we know them for a while very nice people, and would like to explore this avenue.
How do i go from here what would be the easiest way to get this avenue open for discussion without sounding like i want to cheat on my wife, trust me that is the last thing i want to do.

We trust each other completely and i do mean completely
any advice would be grateful

[K. in Cleveland]

Where to start? Let's see..
To begin, if she is open to the idea of a threesome that is a good start. However, if one of her ground rules was no penetration I would ask her why. Is she afraid of having another man's child, is she afraid of catching something, does she feel that is just too intimate to share with anyone besides her husband? I would suggest you talk with her, find out her reasoning and that will show you where to go from there. Of course if it's fear of getting pregnant there are a myriad of birth control options available, least of which is the condom.. which leads to the 2nd possible reason I've listed. Condoms are great, but most responsible swinging people also get tested regularly and should be willing to share results before playing.

Secondly, if you've been involved with your friend and his girlfriend, does your wife know? If she does, how did she react? If she was cool with it, then you're probably on the right track. However, though many people enjoy an open relationship, not everyone can do it. She just may not be open to a full swap. Sometimes there are emotional walls that cannot be broken down in regards to intimacy and sharing. This type of person does not make a good swinger.

I suggest just coming right out and asking her, "hey, what do you think of (our friends) saying they wanted to go to a swinger club? Would that be something you'd like to try sometime?" Or something to that effect. Although, for newbies I wouldn't suggest starting at a club. That might be too intense. A nice frolic with just another couple or even at a house party might be fun.

Good luck!

[vannievan]

Thanks K I will try and let you guys know what happened, just one thing the rule of no penetration that apply's to the ffm 3some I haven't spoken to her about the swinging yet still waiting for a opportunity to bring that into a conversation.
But like i say thanks for your advice

And on my 3some with my friend and his gf she doesn't know, it was before we got together But will try that angle aswell
the only thing is that she didn't like them very much and I know that will count against me