Prolonged grief can turn into depression so think about how long you have been grieving and if it affects other aspects of your life.

Focus On "What" and Not On "Why"

The devil is in the details. Focusing on the "why" will happen.

Why did I not do this, or why did she not do that? 

Trying to understand the why of breakups and why feelings change is like expecting yourself to understand what love is.

If you don’t know "why" you will focus on yourself.

What did I do? What COULD I have done? These aren’t the "whats" we are looking for. We are looking for "What can I do to move forward?"

Here are a few pointers and things to keep in mind to help get passed a break up.

3 Tips to Help You Get Passed a Break Up 

1. Remember Grief is Natural.

You’re not less of a man (or woman) if you feel pain. We’re human, we have emotions and feelings. Welcome to the top of the food pyramid.

2. Get the Support You Need

Ask yourself, "What can I do to feel supported?"

Contact your friends and family and let them in. Nothing shows love like opening up to your loved ones and letting them help you. At our weakest we can be at our strongest.

3. Stay Busy and Productive

Ask yourself, "What can I do to stay busy?

Sitting around and moping can be tedious and affect your health.

Get out and exercise, take yourself out to a movie, go see a friend. Don’t sit and feel sorry for yourself, stay active. Exercise will increase your health and will make you feel better.

Love can make you feel immortal. It can also hurt. That is the other side of the coin.

Think about "what" you can do with yourself after a breakup instead of "why" the break up happened.

Look at how you can love yourself and rely on yourself and not the love of another person. In the long run, you are all you really have control over.

Jason Likert is the founder of DivorcedDadsOnline.com. The goal of DivorcedDadsOnline.com is to provide a support network for divorced (and divorcing) fathers and common-sense advice for parents whether divorced or married.   

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