Talk is Cheap – What Does it Really Mean to Tell Someone “I Love You”?

What does it mean to tell someone "I love you"? 

How many times have people said that to you in your lifetime? 

The words are great to hear.  They make us feel all warm and mushy inside.  Of course, there are different kinds of love. Our minister may say "I love you" but it means something different than when our child says, "I love you".  And of course it means something entirely different when our lover says, "I love you."

How do we know what those words mean and are the words enough?

Here’s another great article by featured author Melody Brooke. I know on some level we can all relate to what she’s saying…

Love in Action

What does it mean to tell someone "I love you"? 

How many times have people said that to you in your lifetime? 

The words are great to hear.  They make us feel all warm and mushy inside.  Of course, there are different kinds of love. Our minister may say "I love you" but it means something different than when our child says, "I love you".  And of course it means something entirely different when our lover says, "I love you."

How do we know what those words mean and are the words enough? I know women like to hear the words, too many years of living with the silent types who can’t say the words can grate on a person after a while.  But its possible to hear the words over and over from people who don’t show it, and the words become meaningless. 

A child who is regularly beaten by his parents hears the words "I love you" and begins to think that love means being hit.  A child whose parents left her at her grandparents for weeks on end hear the words "I love you" and learns that the words mean abandonment.  The words are only meaningful through the action that accompanies them. 

Love then is an action. The actions teach us what the words mean.

I was married to a man who was wonderful on Valentine’s day, on Mother’s Day, on Christmas, and sometimes on my birthday, but the rest of the year failed to take the actions to show me that I was loved. Do I believe he loved me? Yes, I think he did to the extent that he was capable. But I needed him to show me. 

Small things help us know that our partner is thinking of us, sometimes they are microscopic…

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To learn more about Melody Brooke, check out www.ThisIsGreatSex.com.

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  • Wow!


    This article really touched me because I know it to be true from my own experiences. The little things make all the difference in the word. Dan is always excited to see me and greets me with a big hug and kiss. He makes me tea every night to wind down. And he always tucks me in and kissed me good night - even if he has to wake me up to do it (He's the night owl ;-)).


    We actually take it to the extreme by choosing not to celebrate the "Hallmark Holidays". We'd rather make every day Valentine's Day instead of waiting for that one day each year.


    The one thing that I can always say about our relationship is that I know Dan loves me without a doubt - and that's the greatest feeling in the world!

  • The word love is overrated, underrated, abused, used well, wasted, perfected... yeah.
  • Amen brother Jeff.


    Yeah, you often hear people on the phone hurriedly saying "Love you. Love you too." That term is so often used in vain, as a more comforting replacement for "talk to you later", etc.


    But in the end it's your thoughts and your actions that really show your love.


    Have an awesome day!

    Dan

  • Guest
    And don't forget the "I love you" that husbands and fathers say to remind themselves who they pour their lives for.

    It should be an honor to fight for our wife and our childrens dreams to come true. It's not just our duty.
  • In my opinion the phrase "I love you" by itself is completely shallow - meaningless even. If you wimper a little I love you to someone, or passively say it in conversation they won't be convinced - they won't feel it. It's all about the context and the emotion that goes along with it.
  • Dave
    Hi i have this girls as a friend but once in awhile after one of my jokes she said i love dave. She used to never say that till before a week ago so i'm confessed about it. Does it means she thinks i'm a cool person,she likes me or she loves me.
  • Hi Dave.

    Why don't you ask her what she means by her comments? Tell her that's a pretty strong word to throw around and that you're just wondering if she's starting to like you more than just a friend.

    Make sure to let her know that you'll accept her either way.
  • claire
    Love is definitely an overused word. but when you really mean it, how do you say it without seeming meaningless?
  • RR
    Dan and Jennifer have it right.. You can say whatever you want, but it's all really in how you act more that what you say. Love is something that's in your soul and it's obvious when you see that person. It's more unspoken that the word "love" itself.
  • Pamela

    Hi there!!!


    I am/was in a relationship where my guy told me he loved me...just not 100% everyday. He said some days he only loved me 80 or 90%. I have never heard anything like this before? What does this mean?

    I thought when you love someone..it is 100% or nothing?


    Will you give me your comments? I left the relationship. It really hurt to hear one day..i love you 100%...and then the next day...for no reason...i only love you 80%. What was wrong there?

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