5 Ways to Survive Being Around Your In-Laws This Holiday Season

By Lisa Brookes Kift 

<< Previous   Pages:   1 2 3  

4) Avoid Triangulation Between Family Members

Bowen Systems theory states that when there is anxiety between two people, a third person will often be triangulated in to reduce the anxiety.

Don’t get caught in the middle between your partner’s family members.

You are a visitor to the family system (until you’re welcomed and accepted in) and you are asking for trouble by letting a member whisper in your ear about another person. If someone attempts to triangulate you into a situation, let them know you’d rather not get involved. If the person persists, politely excuse yourself. Danger Will Robinson.

5) Breathe

Whether you’re practicing your active listening, trying to remember to remain supportive of your partner, activating your force field or avoiding being triangulated between two family members, the skill of breathing effectively will ease you through it all.

With proper breathing technique (deep in through the nose, all the way down to the belly and slowly out through the mouth), your physiology has a much better chance of remaining unaroused – your calm place. If you have moments of frustration, irritation or the like, step outside or excuse yourself to the restroom to spend a moment taking a few good deep breaths. They’ll take you a long way.

Lisa Brookes Kift is a Marriage & Family Therapist Registered Intern working with individuals and couples in San Diego, California.  She is also the author of other articles on relationships and mental health issues which can be found in numerous online publications and her blog titled, “Notes from a Therapist’s Chair", at http://lisabrookeskift.blogspot.com.  For more information about Lisa’s therapy practice go to www.lisakifttherapy.com.

Pages:   1 2 3  << previous

Have You Read These Related Stories?

•  My Girlfriend Says She Needs Space - What Does That Mean? (Video)
•  Arguments and Fights: Why Won’t You Listen to Me?
•  Is He Really in Love or Are you Just a Fling?
•  Thinking About Breaking Up Or Getting A Divorce? Try This First…
•  How To Survive Being Single This Valentine’s Day

Check Out These Helpful Resources You May Like...

Looking for Sex with No Commitments? Did you know that Adult Friend Finder gets more visitors every day than Match.com and eHarmony combined? Read the story »

How To Give Her Mind Numbing, Leg Shaking Orgasms... Do you believe your girlfriend or wife when she claims to have an orgasm? Here are some surprising facts... Read the story »

How to Approach Any Woman Without Fear of Rejection - Pick Up Secrets Exposed by a Woman How SHOULD a regular guy approach a woman to get her phone number, a date, a... Read the story »

How to Go Down on a Woman and Have Her Begging for More... Amazingly enough, many women have NEVER experienced an orgasm! Think about that for a minute... Read the story »

How Well Do You REALLY Know Your Partner? 1000 Must Ask Questions for Couples How compatible are you really with your partner? Down deep, where it really counts?... Read the story »

500 Sex Tips and Love Making Secrets That Everyone Ought to Know Think back to your last date... after the date, and to that special, sensual part of the evening. Do you remember... Read the story »

Subscribe to AskDanAndJennifer.com today and get the latest Dating, Relationship, Love, and Great Sex content sent straight to your email inbox. Do it today so you don't miss a single article.

Or... Subscribe to Ask Dan and Jennifer via RSS