Long term relationships are the hardest relationships in which you can help the the romance stay alive. But whether you’ve been together for one year or fifty, it’s important to make sure that there is some element of romance in your relationship. Life often intervenes in the form of work, children, and other stressors, but you can’t let that stop you from dedicating time to your significant other. You may not be able to date with the frequency of your early relationship days, but a little effort here and there can go a long way toward getting your spark back. That’s important, because boredom and disconnect can lead to arguments, and have been the end of many long term relationships.

Having Romance Takes Effort

You might not have the time to spend on your long term relationships that you once did, or perhaps you’ve just grown complacent as the years have passed on. That doesn’t mean you should just throw in the towel. Instead, make the best of what time you’ve got. It might sound cliché, but establishing a date night once every few weeks can be a big help. Once you’ve got a date and time picked out, come up with a really fun date idea. Think back to your favorite dates when you were first together. Did you have a particularly great time that night you went bowling? Was there a restaurant you used to love going to that you stopped visiting once you had kids? Recreating an old date not only shows your sweetie how thoughtful you are, but it can also put some spring back into your step. You’ll remember all of the best parts of your early days, and that will put both of you in a great mood.

Other Ways To Keep The Love Alive

Planning the occasional date isn’t the only way to help your love stay alive. Regular physical affection is important, too. Never underestimate the power of impromptu hand-holding, hugging and kissing. It may be a small gesture to momentarily rub your partner’s shoulders after they’ve had a rough day, but it shows you care. Human beings need physical contact with other human beings, and making that connection will make both of you feel happier. Plus, you never know when a shoulder massage or particularly good kiss will lead to more. Sex is a very important part of long term relationships or marriage. If you feel that you and your significant other have had less and less of it lately, take action. Even if you’re feeling a little tired, attempt to go for it anyway. Usually once things get rolling, you’ll find you’re not so tired anymore. The more often you do it, the more often you’ll want it, and vice versa. Therefore the best way to have more sex is to stop fretting about not having it, and just start doing it again. Talk to you partner, too. Mention that you’d like to start spicing things up again, but do so in a non-accusatory way. Nine times out of ten, they’ll be glad you brought it up.

Loving Gestures

Aside from showing physical affection and working dates back into your routine, there are other ways to make sure your long term relationships stay interesting. Small but thoughtful gestures show your significant other that you’re thinking of them. Bring home flowers or a bottle of good wine for no particular reason other than to show you care. If your sweetheart’s had a bad day, offer to engage in one of their favorite activities together. If that means watching their favorite terrible movie, just go with it. Demonstrating your support and love is worth two hours of viewing a bad film. That can be all it takes to remind your S.O. of why they fell for you in the first place.

Ultimately, if you’re willing to put in a little time and effort now and again, you can make things interesting for years to come in your long term relationships. Do your best to remind yourself of everything you love about your partner, then use your actions to remind them of why they love you. That’s the best way to light up the fires at the home.