they are then the “Victim” and in order for them to have any hope, they have no choice but to fight back.  Gangsters find themselves locked into this stupid cycle for generations and with lives lost on either side simply for the reason that they cannot let themselves be in the “Victim” position.Africa is caught in this cycle at the cost of millions of lives. The Judeo-Christian world has been caught in this cycle with Muslims for thousands of years. And women and men are stuck in it as well. 

The death and destruction caused by what I call “The Cycle of Egocentrism” has cost lives, humanity dignity, peace and unfathomable resources throughout time. And it’s so unnecessary.

With all the combined wisdom of our modern world we do know other ways to behave.  But we choose not to because we don’t realize that our behaviors are dictated by primitive brain stem activity that makes us believe the three positions are our only hope for survival. It is our primitive brain, a part of us that evolved to help us survive primitive conditions which dictates our current battles. But we are evolved beings. We do have the capacity to think and make choices based on new information.

As women and men separating ourselves into these “Self Protective” positions we are forever locked into battle.  Yet we do have different choices we can make. We can choose to move out of the idea that in order to avoid being a “Victim” we have to be “Self Protectors”.   Instead we can take ownership of our own lives, and provide ourselves and or former “enemy” with respect and empathy.  We can move out of  “The Cycle of Egocentrism” and into “The Cycle of Compassion” and provide ourselves an opportunity to experience deeper connection with the opposite sex instead of viewing ourselves as opponents in a battle for survival.  The truth is we cannot survive without each other. There is no arena in which this is more obvious than the “battle of the Sexes”. 

Read more great articles from Melody Brooke. 

Featured Author, Melody Brooke, MA, LPC, LMFT is the author of "Cycles of the Heart: A way out of the egocentrism of everyday life", speaker, workshop presenter and counselor. She is also a Certified Radix Practitioner, Right Use of Power Teacher and InterPlay Teacher. Melody’s 19 years work with individuals, couples and families has provided her with a unique approach to solving clients’ problems. 

To find out more about InterPlay and "Cycles of the Heart" go to www.melodybrooke.com.

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