How to Get Your Freak On - The Beginner’s Guide to BDSM

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Are You Ready to Come Out?

Sure you are! You can start by going online and searching for the things that turn you on. The one thing I’ve heard over and over again from loads of people is: “Thank God for the internet. I’m not the only one.” Join an online community – it feels great to be able to let down your guard and talk openly about what you like, even if it is anonymous.

Next, try it out on a trusted friend, the kind of friend who would pick you up at 3am if your car broke down, or bring you a care package of cold syrup and cough drops if you were home sick fighting a monster cold.

Finally, share it with the person you are closest to – you know, the one you live or sleep with. I hear a lot of people claim that they married their best friend, but a best friend in my book is someone you can share EVERYTHING with. As in, no secrets. So just do it already.

A Invaluable Tool

Not able to pinpoint exactly what gets you excited? That’s understandable – you’ve had to keep a lid on it for as long as you can remember. A great way to find out what you like (LOVE!) is to fill out a BDSM checklist. You can find several versions on the internet, but the ones I’ve seen have been limiting or incomplete in my opinion. So I’ve created my own ultimate BDSM fetish checklist. You can easily copy and paste it into a word processing program, or print it out.

Take your time filling it out, chip away at it. Your first pass through it will not be the most accurate. A great next step is to have a friend or your partner fill it out, then compare them. I guarantee when you see someone else’s, you’ll want to go back and add to yours, or change some of the answers to be more honest. (You might also want to fill it out again in a few months and see how the answers have changed.)

How does yours compare to theirs? Are they similar? Are they opposite? If you’re comparing to your partner’s list, how can you incorporate some of these new ideas into your routine? For instance, who knew that you both had a thing for latex? This calls for a trip to the party supply store! Or medical supply store, depending on the kind of latex.

Yes, your journey towards bringing out your inner pervert has begun – congratulations! You’re replacing society’s blindfold and gag with a kind that is much more rewarding and fun.

To learn more about The Beautiful Kind, visit TheBeautifulKind.com.

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