What Everyone Ought to Know About BDSM
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Thatās right, acronyms aren’t just for the office anymore ā it can be a regular alphabet soup in the bedroom, too.
Iām talking about BDSM - the ultimate antidote to vanilla sex.
Sure sex feels good on its own, but have you ever thought about taking it up a notch, pushing your boundaries? Do you have any freaky fantasies that might be ready to leave your head?
Prepare for a challenge ā get off your butt and onto your hands and knees, grab a candle to light the way ā but donāt forget to let some of the hot wax drip on your sensitive flesh…
What does BDSM stand for, anyway? The interchangeable initials stand for:
Bondage & Discipline / Domination & Submission / Sadism & Masochism
Letās expand on the first four now, because S&M deserves an entire article of its own.
As you read through the list, pay attention to your feelings.
Which concepts intrigue you the most and inspire you to place an ad on a fetish site, or buy your partner a pair of shiny steel oiled handcuffs?
Bondage
I canāt remember if my first exposure to bondage was watching the Wonder Woman television show or receiving pink and green paper Chinese handcuffs in a party favor bag, but I know that both of those things had me daydreaming of lassoing that boy who always ran away from me on the playground, or tricking him into being my slave for a day because I had him trapped by his fingers.
Bondage is incorporating restraint into lovemaking.
Itās giving yourself over to the pleasure and entrusting yourself to your partner. Being tied up can feel scary, relaxing, embarrassing, arousing, intense…The sky’s the limit with the emotions that can come into play.
Itās also a great way to utilize neckties now that they arenāt worn in the workplace much anymore. Iām always pleased to visit a friendās house and see colorful neckties affixed to their bedposts - itās a sure sign of a healthy sex life.
These days Iāve graduated to nylon rope, which is easily obtained at hardware stores. More discriminating folks in the lifestyle opt for hemp rope, which is available online and in sex shops in a variety of colors.
Discipline
Thank you sir, may I have another?
Discipline is the use of rules and punishment to control the behavior of someone else. A rule can be as simple as not allowing someone to say āthank youā for the evening, and if they transgress, punishment ensues.
What is the first thing that comes to mind when you think of the word āpunishmentā?
Spanking, perhaps? Oh sure, I love a good classic like spanking, but punishment neednāt be physical. BDSM can be extremely creative, not to mention mental.
I have my own personal list of punishments that I like being "forced" to do. Plus my partner is always good at keeping me on my toes. Or on my knees…
Domination/Dominant/Dominatrix/Dom
Also known as the Master, Mistress, Boss, or Top.
A Dom is in charge, gives orders…
Have You Read These Related Stories?
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- Tools of the Trade… Your BDSM Shopping List
- How to Get Your Freak On - The Beginner’s Guide to BDSM
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Oh isn’t BDSM wonderful??? Purrr……
I’m curious as to how much public lifestyle exposure TBK has seen. She’s stereotyping a lot and putting everyone into very specific categories. That’s not to say she’s wrong about what she says…it’s just not this simple.
Take this with you, play with it and enjoy BDSM for whatever you find in it, absolutely. But, please, expand your education in the lifestyle by understanding all facets. Seek out locals, find other information, read books by Wiseman, Midori, and Antoniou. Find classes offered by Catherine Gross.
But definitely expand knowledge beyond this.