Contrary to popular belief, pornography is actually watched by many people – both men, women and couples.

Watching pornography isn’t something to be ashamed of or embarrassed about because it’s more than likely that the person sitting right next to you watches it to.

That said, is it possible that someone can watch too much pornography or become addicted to it?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Hi, I’ve just watched the video about a woman being addicted to pornography and it made me think.

I think it’s fair to say I’m addicted to pornography …  But the twist is that it can’t be because I’m lazy and I don’t even have a sex life.  I don’t have a relationship, and I’m not interested in getting one anytime soon. Is watching porn every other night or so bad?

- Kevin,   California

How much porn is too much?

Generally, even watching pornography as often as every other night and in some cases every night isn’t considered “too much.”  That depends, though.  How much is too much?  There are no set “rules” for how often someone has to watch pornography for it to become “unhealthy” or “too much.”  It varies from person to person.  For example, someone who watches pornography every couple of nights but who has always done this and still maintains healthy, loving and sexual relationships in their life has not taken the habit to an unhealthy level.

On the other hand, if someone who rarely watches pornography begins watching every night or every other night and is lacking meaningful, intimate relationships may have an issue that needs to be dealt with.  There is no one way to tell if someone is watching too much pornography – it’s something you have to judge for yourself.

Can pornography be addicting?  Sure – everything can be addicting, especially for someone who has an addictive personality.  That, however, doesn’t mean that if you watch porn often that you are automatically addicted to it.  You have to truly think about whether it’s an actual addiction or not.

Do you think about pornography all the time, even when you’re not watching it?  Do you find that you’re irritable or act differently if you don’t watch it?  Do you reschedule appointments, skip family time or stay at home while your friends are out just so you can watch porn?  If you’re answering “yes” to any of these questions, you might be addicted to it.  If not, then you most likely have nothing to worry about.

If you find that you’d rather watch pornography than have an actual, meaningful and sexual relationship, that’s something you need to really take a look at.  It wouldn’t be the first time someone has used pornography in an attempt to avoid being hurt in a relationship or being taken advantage of.  Let’s face it – watching pornography is a lot faster, takes less effort and ends when you want it to.

Theoretically, it’s the greatest relationship ever.  In reality, if you’re substituting porn for an actual relationship, you end up missing out.  Do you have deep seated issues that keep you from dating or beginning relationships?  If there are psychological reasons that keep you from having relationships, such as childhood abuse or self confidence issues, the best way to work those out is with a therapist.

All in all, the majority of people who watch pornography – even if it’s nightly or every other night – aren’t addicted to it nor do they watch it “too often.”  Does someone who never watches pornography watch it “too little?”  That’s unlikely – so it differs from person to person.  If you’re comfortable watching porn, your relationships aren’t suffering and you’re not showing classic signs of a serious addiction or deeper issues . . . well, sit back, relax and enjoy!