There is no shortage of guys trying to get women to go to bed with them. If you have ever experienced the seduction techniques of a guy trying to get you into bed, and almost every woman has, then you are probably familiar with some of the methodology. Although you might think that you’re well versed in this subject, there are a few staples that almost every guy uses to try to get laid. Here are the top 4 things that guys say to get you into bed.

1. “Let’s Watch A Movie”

It doesn’t matter if you are at a bar or hanging around your house in sweatpants, if you ever get a call from a guy asking you to come watch a movie, he’s probably trying to get you into bed. On the offhand occasion that you actually meet a guy that is a film buff or a nice guy that knew you wanted to see a particular movie, you might want to accept, but remember to keep your guard up.

One of the best moves is to get you over to his place and then make some kind of excuse as to why the movie has to be watched in his room other than in the living room. This is usually because of a roommate situation or because the better TV is in his room, etc. For the most part, watching a movie doesn’t mean watching a movie. It means sex.

2. “Let’s Go Out For A Drink”

Ever get this call? “Hey! Just seeing what you’re up to. I wanted to know if you would like to meet up for a drink tonight.” This is a classic move. He’s not asking you out for dinner. He’s not asking you out for rock climbing. He’s not even asking you out for ice cream.

He’s asking you out for “a” drink, which probably means several drinks to loosen you up. When a guy calls you and asks if you want to go out for a drink, he’s not really interested in getting to know you or interested in following the traditions of courtship. He’s looking for a fast track into your pants. Don’t fall for the “Let’s Get A Drink” gag.

3. “Let’s Go Somewhere Else”

Number 2 actually leads us to Number 3, the technique known as “The Bounce Back.” The Bounce Back is a staple among the pick up artist community. This typically involves meeting a girl in a bar, club, grocery store or any other public forum. The guy will get to know you a little and then ask you to go somewhere else with him. This could be a restaurant, another bar or club, an art gallery or essentially anywhere else that is not the place you are currently at.

The theory behind it is that with each change of venue, you feel more comfortable with him. The more comfortable with him, the more likely you will have sex with him. The worst thing about this technique is that it works and it works really well. If you have met a guy in a bar or out for a drink, be weary of going to a new place with him. He might just be trying to get you into the sack.

4. “Let’s Hang Out”

This is a tried and true method of seduction. It’s a calm and ambiguous way of simply getting together. This is fairly similar to the movie idea, but it is less planned. The guy will probably not have any activity planned other than getting you over to his house.

When a guy asks you to hang out, make sure that he has something planned. One of the easiest ways to get around this is for the guy to say something along the lines of “Well, just come on over and we’ll figure something out.” If he says this to you, you might want to just hang up the phone right then and there.

If the guy is really interested in you, he will want to impress you. Impressing you doesn’t involve getting you over to his house a romp in the sheets. Avoid the “Let’s Hang Out” and you will be avoiding heartbreak in the long run.

Recognizing these 4 seduction methods will keep you out of trouble. A guy that is not going to follow tradition is not somebody that you want to be with. Make it a point to be on the lookout for any of these techniques and your life will be free of pick up artists and players alike.

Yes, it is typically the sign that of a “job well done,” but did you know that there is way more behind the male orgasm? For example, sometimes a man can have two orgasms in one, meaning that he feels that release sensation at the beginning of climax and then feels a sudden burst of pleasure at the end. Sometimes, a man can have an orgasm and not ejaculate at all while other times, he can ejaculate and not feel a thing. Now that you are aware that you might not have all of the signals down pat, how do you know if you have given him amazing pleasure?

There is one way to guarantee that you are giving your man satisfaction and showing him that you know your way around the male body and that is to give him total body sex. This means that you just aren’t going to go for the gold and head straight to his penis to make him orgasm. No, you are better than that. Instead, you are going to learn how to please a man from head to toe and to really give him an all over amazing sensation that he won’t soon forget.

Above The Neck

There are many spot on a man’s head that can really get him going in the bedroom. Obviously you have his eyes to attract by wearing something sexy, his nose by wearing some delicious scent and his lips to give him passionate kisses to send chills all throughout his body but there is so much more. For example, kissing on his ears, his neck, scratching his scalp, digging your nails into the back of his neck and so on are all things that contribute to pleasure.

Even using your fingers on his lips will get him going. Try biting on his lips or even grazing them with your fingertips. Anything that you can do that will tease and tantalize him is definitely the way to go.

Torso And Arms

The obvious hot spots on a man’s torso are his nipples but stay away from that. Those are the typical spots that he is used to having stimulated by you and are you a typical lover? Of course not! You want to kick this up a notch and truly show him that you know how to give him total body sex all the way from his head and down to his itty bitty toes.

Instead of going for the nipples, try stimulating his back and stomach. Kissing on his back or stomach and even using your nails to scratch all the way down will give him some amazing satisfaction. Remember that men love that rough stimulation so the rougher it is, the better. Also, don’t forget about his arms. Using your fingers and nails to trace along his forearms will give him a sensation he probably never knew he had. The skin is extra thin on his forearms so feeling your nails digging deep will definitely drive him wild.

Don’t forget about his fingers either. A super sexy tip to try is to suck on his fingers to mimic oral sex. Feeling those warm and wet lips of yours tracing along his fingers will make him desperately want to feel that warm mouth on another part of his body.

Thighs And Legs

We all know how amazing it feels to have a man kiss our inner thighs and before oral sex. This move may be a bit too sensitive for your man to handle but that doesn’t mean that you can’t give him stimulation there in a different way. Again, your fingers and nails are capable of so much pleasure it is insane. Digging your nails deep into his thighs will drive him wild because not only is the skin sensitive there but it is also so close to his penis and the closer you are without touching it, the more you are going to drive him absolutely wild.

The best part about giving your man total body sex is that there are no rules. You don’t necessarily have to start from head to toe. You can always mix and match these tips to suit whatever your man’s needs might be in that moment. You can do a lot to him or a little; it is up to you. You are in the driver’s seat when you are pleasing him and it is all up to you how close to the edge you want to take him tonight.

Get Comfortable With It

For a lot of people, even in this day and age, with a media saturated in sexual imagery, sex can be incredibly uncomfortable to discuss. Even with our most intimate partners. Especially when unsatisfied, your wife may not be articulating what she wants or needs sexually, as she’s afraid of hurting your feelings.

Before you start the conversation, you need to get comfortable saying the words associated with sex – penis, vagina, clitoris, G-Spot, orgasm, lubrication and intercourse. Say them out loud, somewhere private, and just get comfortable with the sound of them in your mouth. When you can say them to yourself without blushing, you are ready to say them to the person you love.

Take The Initiative

In order to open her up, you need to take the first step. If she feels like you are grilling her with some kind of sexual interview, she may retreat. Instead, you need to spend some time – days, maybe even weeks – communicating to her how important her sexual satisfaction and overall pleasure is for you.

When she knows that any helpful tips, comments or critiques she gives you will be accepted as a gift, she can feel as if she is giving them to you, instead of that she is burdening you with them. When she is ready to divulge information about her sexual preferences, don’t take in a list of questions and read it off like an interview. Go in having already thought about what you want to know about her, and take the time to volunteer some of the same information about yourself to encourage her when you start out.

Take care to be positive and gentle when talking about her sexual performance. Tell her what she already does that you like!

Make A Deal

No accusations, no judgments, no huffy remarks or pouty lips; it’s time to sit down and have that chat. Sexpert Tracey Cox suggests three things to remember when it comes time for open and honest communication about your sex life:

First, take the time to figure out what it is you want, and be very specific. You know that you aren’t satisfied with your sex life, and you probably figure your wife isn’t either. Do you want to know how to please her better? Do you want more sex? How much more, and what kind? Do you need to have more orgasms, or do you want to opportunity to touch her more often? Do you want to have sex more in the morning, or during the daylight hours? Are you interested in trying more new things, or is there something you know that you like, that you want to do more often?

Second, how much information do you really want from her? Do you want details of past lovers and how they touched her? Are you prepared to hear about any difficult or shocking experiences? It is important to know how many details you are willing to divulge as well. Tell her how much you are willing to hear, and let her do the same.

Finally, agree that “no” means “no more.” Whether it’s just the sexual conversation, or time to try things out, it is important to have a clear understanding that either of you can say “I’m sorry, that technique (or role play, or sex position) isn’t working” or “Hey, I need a break to collect my thoughts” if things aren’t going quite the way you anticipated.

It can be a bit overwhelming when you try to get into the details, which is why you should think about it for a while before you sit down to talk. Furthermore, you should give your wife the chance to think about it as well. When you sit down to make your deal, take the time to discuss what you really want to know about each other.

Maybe not as much when brittle bones and cardiac complications set in, but it will always be an element of your existence. Whether it’s vicarious sex or a simple interlocking of hands with your wife of 50 years, sex takes a whole lifetime to appreciate.

The Good News – Sex Gets Better With Age

Like wine, huh?

You get good at it the more you do it. You’ll soon master its in’s & outs and will be able to calibrate your woman down to the most minuscule detail. Similarly, she’ll also master you, discovering how you want booty served. As you two get to know each other, sex will spiral up.

Really?! Then why do people tend to spiral the other way?

For many couples, this is what happens: Sex was good, no, it was GREAT! They made love like the gods. They were Energizer bunnies who just won’t stop. They thought the passion would last forever… but nobody’s falling for that now.

That was yesterday, viewed through rose-colored glasses. Today, sex (with that same old hag) has become boring – almost a drudgery. All they have are memories of what has been…and they are just 27 years old!

What’s up with that? If sex is supposed to get better over time, then why end up in a rut where it has become soulless, dead, ho-hum and unexciting?

It’s Only Up To A Point

Beyond an optimum point, things start going downhill. The body cannot realistically maintain levels of brain chemistry that cause passion to wax hot. The Law of Averages dictates that over time, all things come back and plateau on the average. Passion has to simmer down when the novelty of sex ceases. If it’s all the same – same partner, same set of breasts, same sexual positions, same moans – sex will definitely get old.

Chances are, a day will come when you’d rather sleep than make-love to that fat ogre beside you. There’s no set time, but it’ll definitely happen. You’ll feel it, she’ll feel it, you two will definitely feel it. When you hear things like, “I’m just not as horny as I used to be,” you’re getting there.

But that’s okay. Things getting old is fine, that’s life. Nothing is wrong with the idea of sex losing its charm, it’s your response to this new sexual dynamic that needs tweaking.

New Challenges Await You

Recognize that when this “up to a point” comes, it only means A NEW STAGE IN YOUR SEXUAL RELATIONSHIP HAS BEEN ACHIEVED. This brings with it a new set of challenges and it’s important that you appropriately respond to them. It doesn’t mean your run is over, you don’t need to swear off sex altogether.

Whereas the challenge in the past was getting home in the least amount of time, your new challenge could be finding new and exciting ideas to bring into bed.

And that takes work, a lot of work. Not manual labor, but brain power. You need to don your creative hat for this. And for many people, the very idea of honing creativity for sexual purposes is just too much, they’d rather find someone else new. But in committed, long-term relationships, it’s not that simple – or wise.

Morning Sex

Morning sex. I’m not talking after breakfast, or after dropping the kids off. I’m talking about first thing in the morning. Or earlier. We all know that there’s no wood like morning wood. Even if your lover is normally harder than Chinese arithmetic at all times, he will still be at his hardest and most potent when his little man wakes up to greet the day.

Often his member will wake up before he does. This is awesome. Fuck his brains out, whether or not he’s fully awake. Hop on and get off. He will wake up and join the party. Even if he doesn’t, he will wake up with a smile on his face.

He will probably last longer than any other time during the day, so be prepared. This can mean multiple orgasms for you. If you’re only in the mood for a quickie, get yourself warmed up with vibrators and or masturbation before you have sex with him.

Finishing Off With Oral Sex

Make sure to finish him off with some really great oral sex if you go the quickie route, and of course, put a condom on his penis if you engage in anal sex, for obvious reasons. If he’s still asleep when you bring him to orgasm, try taking his load in your mouth (or on your face if you’re into facials) and then waking him up, letting him see his semen all over your face or in your mouth. Waking up to a woman who’s got your load in your mouth is hot. Watching her swallow after she’s had her way with you is just plain sexy, and is a really, really great way to start the day.

Did you know that’s how Einstein started each and every day? Who knows where we would be as a society if he hadn’t had morning sex before he even got out of bed to start the day. I shudder to think about it.

He Can Service You Too!

It can work both ways too. There’s nothing wrong with him starting the day by servicing his lady (or his dude, whatever you’re into). If you start the day with a roll in the hay, you’ve put yourself in a really great position to have the best possible day, and a stress free one. It’s really hard to get upset when your brain has been scrambled by all those sexually released chemicals. You might not cut someone off on the way to work, or you might be a little more relaxed when you go to Starbucks and you spend twenty minutes behind a person, only to watch in horror as they finally get up to the counter and still haven’t figured out what they want!

You do each other every morning and you’ll notice a huge difference in your life. It will lower your stress levels, get you going, in a good way and you’ll probably find that you really appreciate your partner more and before you know it that increased physical intimacy will lead to increased emotional intimacy.

Sex is like the canary in the well of your relationship. If that’s wild and passionate and frequent, your relationship is in really good shape. If it’s dull, boring and infrequent, well, that’s not so good.

Do It Even When You Don’t Want To

My advice is molest your partner early every morning regardless of whether or not you want to. This is especially true and important for people who have kids. I’m not in the mood, you say? Well, I hate to break it to you, but women have been having sex without wanting to or being in the mood for centuries and nobody died from that. So just do it, even if you don’t think you want to. You will be really glad you did after you’re done having oral sex, anal sex, plain old missionary style intercourse or whatever you’re into. You’re welcome.

So What’s Your Thing?

It’s this one fetish you’ve been dreaming of since teenhood. Ever since you realized your penis’ calling, you couldn’t wait for that day when you could finally share this unique sexual activity with someone. You’re certain it’s going to be great, and you’ve been playing it in your head over and over – for hours each night. That’s your THING.

Now, you’ve grown up, and the stage is set. You have your own place and a gorgeous adoring woman. You’ve waited for this all your life – it’s finally going to happen – but she says, “I’m sorry honey, but I don’t do that!”

These were the last words you heard before all your dreams came crashing down. If you listen closely, you’ll hear the quaint sound of your heart breaking into a million shiny pieces.

“But why? It’s gonna be fun,” you tempted.

“I don’t know, I just don’t wanna,” the prude answered.

You threatened legal action, physical repercussions, yes, even groveled, but still came out empty. For the life of you, you can’t convince your lover that it’s going to be okay. She just doesn’t see herself doing that thing with you – nope, not in this lifetime.

So, what’s left to do?

Before hanging the gloves in desperation, here are 3 practical things to do.

1. Find Out If Its Negotiable

Your thing could easily come in conflict with her self-image – she just doesn’t see herself that way. The fetish could be so beyond her boundaries as a sexual being, the moment she heard of it, it made her butt cheeks clinch ever so tightly.

Or, maybe it’s not her, maybe it’s you. Maybe you’ve just been watching too much porn and your erotic expectations are drastically skewed or out of sync. Perhaps what you’re suggesting is so out of this world, 99% of women will say “Nuh-uh,” while dragging you to the Psych Ward.

But granted, the thing, even though it conflicts with her self-image, is a reasonable activity for normal human beings, you need to ask one vital question: IS IT STILL NEGOTIABLE? (You have to give an honest answer to this.)

It may not be how she sees herself presently, but, is it negotiable? Can you possibly tempt her into it? Women have very flexible self-images. They think and say they can’t or won’t, initially allergic even to the very thought of kinky sex. This is usually just their default answer to novel stuff and things outside their comfort zones.

But given proper prodding, they’ll come around and turn out to be wonderful freaks in bed. It’s true, you can get a girl who is very anti anal sex to really love it! But you have to sense if the “NO” is negotiable, or if it’s something driven deep in her core values, solid and totally non-negotiable.

If it’s non-negotiable, then MOVE ON, GET OVER IT, don’t force the issue. She has every right to say “no.” Just because she’s in an intimate relationship with you doesn’t diminish that right a tiny bit.

But if you think there’s a sliver of possibility, then continue with #2. Answer this very important question -

2. What’s In It For Her?

Look at things from your lover’s point of view, what good will your “thing” bring her?

Of course, she can simply accommodate her man’s eccentric and kinky fantasies, but what good will it bring her personally? And don’t just say, “It’s gonna be fun!” You need more than that. Because if she just wants fun, she can turn to a million other things.

“What’s in it for her?” This is what sales savants constantly ask themselves. Only when you take the buyer’s perspective and slide your feet into her shoes, will you be able to understand how to sell it to a woman.

I don’t want to know whatever your thing is, it’s your thing. But basically, you are the seller, she is the unwitting shopper. Don’t sell by declaring, “Do this so I can check it off my list of things to do before I die.” That means nothing to her! If you want “Message Received” blinking in her head, you have to sell it from the opposite perspective.

By looking through her eyes, you can make your thing very inviting and alluring. Package it so she’s poised to gain something from the experience, not as if she’s merely accommodating another one of your whims. Make her engage in it for her own sake. Make it unique and serve it up as a challenge or something new both of you can try. Make sure to give her a climax when she engages in the activity with you. Only then can you finish off with the “It’s gonna be fun” icing.

And you know you’ve done well when she becomes more rabid about it than you.

Here’s the thing. On some level, your girl knows exactly what you’re doing. She knows you’re tempting her, so don’t treat her like some gullible 6-year old. Women are not naïve. They sense these things, so level with them.

And ultimately, leave the decision to her.

3. Know When To Stop

Groveling & begging is not and will never be an option!

Begging? Are you kidding me?! You’re the one with the goods here. Why would you resort to groveling just to be given a shot? To me, it doesn’t make an iota of sense. It’s like a billionaire pointing a gun to some homeless guy’s head, threatening to kill the poor soul if he doesn’t take off with his briefcase of cash.

I repeat, DO NOT GROVEL OR BEG FOR YOUR THING. Honestly, in the past, when has groveling helped your cause or resulted into an amazing time? The best you get out of it is pity & accommodation – which by the way, rapidly comes in short supply.

You can’t get everything through After talk, for one can never out-talk or out-argue a woman who has already made up her mind. Your case cannot be pleaded with wit or logic, unless you can fashion a paradigm shifting speech.

The more you push for your thing, the more she’ll push back – so the more passionate you are about it, the stronger her resistance becomes. This is a negative spiral that you never should get into.

Her saying “No” doesn’t mean the end of things. A verbal “No” in Aftertalk can be adjusted, modified, even reversed during the sex itself. I’m not saying that her words don’t hold water, I’m saying they can be massaged into something else.

The palatability of stuff becomes very different when a woman is in the heat of things. While talking, which usually involves the thinking brain, she can very easily say “NO.” But when she’s in the heat of the moment, enveloped with the orgasm rush, her emotional brain, which knows very few rules, takes over and gets with the flow.

(When talk doesn’t help, go work for your thing during the sex itself. Yes, you can smoothly introduce your woman to kinky stuff she initially said “no” to. So you can then tell her, “See, I told you it would be fun!”)

Just as she’s getting in the mood for more, you take a dive down south and stick in a finger to see if the waters are warm. If she’s not ready, it’s back to the testing phase – a little more kissing, necking, nipples and bum. This back and forth is not only annoying when we aren’t aroused yet, but makes us feel pressured. The only thing that seems to make a difference toward the success of women who overcome sexual dysfunction is the commitment of their mates.

Wet Doesn’t Mean Ready

If your wife is warm and wet when you test her out, do you take that as a sign that it’s time for sex and head straight for intercourse? Not so fast! Being lubricated and being open for sex is not the same thing. One of the best sex tips to give is don’t assume just because they are wet that they are ready. Their body and mind need to be open before intercourse will feel good to them.

Don’t fall victim to the belief that if you don’t “strike while the iron is hot” she will become less aroused as you continue to stimulate her before having sex. The opposite is true, unless she’s really tired, in which case there’s no magic you can do besides giving her a chance to get the rest she needs.

She will learn to lovingly live with it, much more than she would learn to live with you being standoffish, awkward and emotionally distant because you’re always “waiting for the right time.”

It’s Not Always About Orgasm

Yes, women like to have an orgasm. We are human after all, and our bodies are programmed for pleasure. Perhaps it is the fact that men are three to five times more likely than women to orgasm during every sexual encounter but we women don’t need to be so goal-oriented.

Sure, it might be fun to play a game once in a while, just to see how many orgasms your wife can have, but she doesn’t want every sexual moment to be a marathon. Each encounter doesn’t have to be an event – sometimes it’s nice to just relax and enjoy the sensations and emotions of being together.

No Pushing

In other words, stop acting like it’s the end of the world if your woman doesn’t come! What is the point of being passive aggressive? Bullying your partner into enjoying herself is pretty counter-intuitive, right?

Intercourse is supposed to be about feeling good and there are plenty of good feelings that may not lead directly to orgasm. Heck, if she gets there every time, she’s doing better than 85% of other women out there, and only about half report having orgasms with their partner.

A Watched Pot Never Boils

I like sex. In fact, I love it. I love orgasms, too. But when my husband would ask me over and over if I was “there yet?” it drove me mad! Sure, it was nice to know that he cared one way or the other. But the pressure to perform for him was so overwhelming; I would end up faking just to get him to stop asking.

Here is one of the best sex tips I know. No woman wants to be pestered about her orgasm. Honestly, if you have to ask, you aren’t fingering her well enough yet to make her body tell you of its own volition. In this case, that is where you should be focusing your energy, not pushing your orgasmic expectations and your trivial real-world cares and stresses onto her exactly when she needs to relax and let go the most.

Great Expectations

Let me put this very simply. If you can’t tell whether or not your partner has had a female orgasm, you better stop acting like Casanova and trying to collect orgasms like trophies. When you can recognize the tell-tale signs of an orgasm, put your mouth to good use and make it happen! And I don’t mean by talking at her incessantly until she fakes it so you’ll shut up and leave her be.

Sometimes, I am just not in the mood for wild sex and multiple orgasms, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to cuddle or play. Just because your wife might not up for The Big O doesn’t mean you can’t work on one for you, or suggest a bit of mutual masturbation! Many women will start to experience the onset of sexual desire after getting started, so a slightly-less-than-enthusiastic response isn’t the kiss of death.

Divorce is trying on emotions and the sex life. But there’s nothing better than that first orgasm you have after a breakup. And we’re not talking about the orgasm you initiate yourself.

For most people, during the course of a divorce or during a marriage that’s not functional, their hand (or vibrator) becomes their best friend. Where do you think the acronym B.O.B. came from?

You know: battery operated boyfriend.  It came from women that were frustrated during the process of being separated and getting divorced or breaking up.

Get Over The Frustration

I understand the frustration that occurs—sexually and otherwise—during a breakup. And it’s too bad really. But there’s nothing better than after breakup sex.

It’s almost like going to a car dealer for the very, very first time and smelling that new car smell.  There’s nothing better than the new-person smell, especially after the last one was so stinky and old and had too many miles on it. I’ve been there.

I’ve been married 2.5 times, so I know all about after-divorce sex.  The anticipation, the build up—oh my god, it’s so good! I’ve got to tell you, the first time you look at another person’s eyes, you look deep into them and you think to yourself “all I want is sex.”

All I Want Is Sex

“I don’t want to talk about the kids.  I don’t want to talk about money.  I don’t’ want to talk about anything. I just want you to do me, all night long.”

It’s the best foreplay you will ever have.

The first time you sleep with a new person after ending a relationship—whether it’s divorce or just breaking-up a relationship—consider that the person is literally re-taking your virginity all over again.

Some of you have cobwebs down there; it’s been so long.  Some of you are really, really rusty. But here’s the deal—and remember this because it’s really important: the first person you sleep with after you separate is the last person you want to have a relationship with.

Don’t Make This BIG Mistake

Think about it. You are full of emotion, full of desire and infatuation.  It’s lust.

And a lot of people go into the mistake of getting involved in relationships with somebody right away, because the sex is so good, because that’s what was probably  is lacking in your relationship.  Usually when people are going through relationship issues, the sex stops.

So, of course, it’s the first thing you want to replace, because you’ve been deprived for so long.  But, it’s also the biggest trap. That trap is hot sex. The first person you sleep with after a relationship ends is the last person you want to have a relationship with.

Remember that the next time you have that lust.  You need to spend time alone after a relationship ends.  You need to go back and get some good sex, have some fun, figure out what life is all about.

Don’t Fall Into This Trap!

Don’t fall into the trap of getting with that person that wants to do you in any way, shape or form—they’re really just feeding off of your sexually energy.  Because when we get out of a marriage or relationship, we’ve got incredible sexual energy.

It’s almost like a little kid being let loose on the playground.  It’s almost like the first day of school.  It’s almost like going to the best buffet in Vegas, all you can eat.

But the problem is, you don’t want to hit a buffet every single night.  You certainly don’t want to be in school forever, and you certainly can’t be in Vegas for longer than 48 hours.

So, think about that the next time you’ve got some good after-breakup sex.  Or if you are going through a break-up right now, don’t get trapped by that great buffet.

And most of all, they love to lavish attention on the beauty that is the female body. Here are 3 steamy sex secrets from the sex gods that you can use to make your woman fall all over you. Pay heed to this “gender intelligence” and become a sex god yourself!

1. The Art Of Silent Conveyance

Let your eyes, hands and body do the talking . A woman should know that you want her without you having to speak the words. This is conveyed in the way that you look at a woman, the way that you behave around a woman and the way you touch a woman’s body.

Let your fingers rest on hers for a second longer than necessary. Look at her with desire in your eyes. Get her emotionally prepared for what is coming next, and have her eagerly anticipating it as well!

2. The Art Of Tender Embrace

Once you are sure that your advances are welcomed, take her into your arms and begin kissing her, caressing her at the same time. Touch her all over, but do not fumble, stumble or grope. Your movements should be fluid and you should embrace her body.

Give her sensual delight and she will be over the moon in no time. Embracing her is not just fumbling around with her breasts and vagina; it is the intimate act of getting her physically and mentally aroused for sex.

3. The Art Of Oral Exploration

Sexual intercourse is not the only way to sexually gratify a woman. Cunnilingus is often billed as one of the “most wanted” sexual acts by women, and for a simple reason. The tongue is your body’s strongest muscle. And the tantalizing touch of a man’s tongue on a woman’s body is like no other, and cannot be replicated by any other things.

Being naturally lubricated with saliva, your tongue is also a far more effective and maneuverable tool than your penis to give her awesome orgasms. Learn how to tease her clitoris orally and you will have her as hot as a tigress in heat, waiting to burst forth with orgasmic pleasure.

If she is already struggling to reach orgasm regularly, so might not want the additional pressure of trying to orgasm over and over again.

There are several ways to assist your partner with finding the path to multiples, as all women have the capacity, but only if she is prepared and has opened her mind to the idea. It’s all just a matter of creating the perfect storm.

What To Do After The First Orgasm

Once she has experienced her first orgasm, you want to ensure she remains aroused. Cuddle, coo, snuggle and tell your lover how much you appreciate her, all while slowly and gently stimulating the clitoral head and hood.

If she is too sensitive, pull back to the labia, the mons or even the inner thigh. Basically, whatever pressure, rhythm and position you were in prior to her orgasm, you want to continue along those lines but more gently and with less force.

Focus on the romance for a bit instead of the orgasm, and allow her a bit of a breather. Just don’t stop touching for more than a few seconds at a time, or the cool-off period will begin.

Watch Her Breathing

Once your girl’s breathing starts slowing back to normal (but before it gets all the way there), start with a bit more pressure along the mons pubis. If need be, shift into another position that offers strong symphysis and/or G-Spot stimulation.

If you can, put your hand over the mons pubis and feel around for the clitoral shaft, making sure she is getting the proper angle for lots of rubbing and friction.

Move your body further up hers if you are in a sex position facing her, so that you can help her rise toward climax again. If she pushes you away or says she’s too sensitive, take things back a few notches but don’t stop entirely.

Focus On The Other Parts

Focus on other parts of her body that arouse her until she starts to move of her own accord, rubbing against you in search of more stimulation. When her hips thrust and her breathing quickens, you can start playing with her mons pubis and pressing up against her pubic bone.

Her second orgasm should occur in less time than it took the first, only because her body didn’t regress all the way back to the non-aroused state before beginning her next ascent to climax.

Although she could be displeased with her man in the bedroom, her lack of sexual desire and orgasms is usually related to much more than his faulty techniques and inability to give her an orgasm.

The good news is that such problems can be resolved. But for that to happen, you must be willing and able. So if she does not have a desire for sex and ability to have an orgasm is lacking, take a deep breath, blow it out, and find comfort in knowing that this problem can be fixed. Neither of you are doomed to a sex life without pleasure.

In fact, if you follow all of the steps you will be able to provide her with what she needs to “want” to have sex and to achieve orgasm. The following sex tips are a few things you can do to help ease any tension that may exist between the two of you and open her mind to exploring new sexual terrain with you:

Don’t Be Negative

If you accuse your partner of being frigid or lying there like a cold, dead fish, you’ll cause her to retreat from sex even more. So do the opposite. Lift her self-esteem and shower her with compliments (sexual and otherwise). Help her to feel comfortable about talking about her sexual issues with you by sharing all of the positive thoughts you have about her.

Don’t Pressure Her Into Having An Orgasm

Pressuring your lady to have an orgasm when she doesn’t feel like it will only make her want to avoid it more. Remove the pressure by making it clear to her that you will never get upset with her or offended if she doesn’t have an orgasm or doesn’t feel like having sex. If pressuring her, sulking or getting angry is what you’ve typically done in the past, let her know those days are over and never do it again!

Discuss The Issue With Her

Find some quiet time to have a talk with your lady about her difficulty achieving an orgasm. Tell her you’ve noticed that she doesn’t seem to climax as often as you would like for her to. Ask her why, and be sure she knows you are only trying to get some answers, not make her feel bad. Ask her some pointed questions: Is she tired or do your methods need some improvement?

Does she want more foreplay? Would a sensual massage help? Provide her with support if her inability to orgasm is due to a painful past. Let your lady know you understand. Tell her you understand how painful it must be for her. Encourage her to talk to a counselor who specializes in sexual problems in women.

Be sure not to force her to tell you every sordid detail about her experience. But let her know that you are there for her if she wants to talk. Never judge her, and do your best to avoid offering her advice. Just listen and provide her with lots of nonsexual hugs.

Tell Her How Much You Love Her

A woman never tires of hearing her man say, “I love you.” And a woman who feels loved and secure will be more likely to relax and trust enough to allow you to satisfy her deepest desires. There’s a lot you can do to sexually arouse her and provide your girl with the stimulation she needs to have an orgasm.

Just keep in mind that it doesn’t happen overnight. If bringing her to a female orgasm has been a challenge in the past, then it’s going to take some time, effort, understanding, and practice before you are able to give her the Big O.

But that’s not all it’s going to take. It’s also going to take lots of KNOWLEDGE! And that’s exactly what you’re getting by reading this book. So keep reading—the best has yet to come (no pun intended)!

What She Said:

Congratulate Yourself!

First of all, if your man is complaining of blue balls, check his ID.  No adult man would own up to the idea you are giving him blue balls.  And I have yet to know of any man who died of it.  I’m not sure it even exists.

But if for some reason your man is complaining of it, then you should congratulate him. He is obviously with one smoking hot babe that he cannot wait to get his hands all over.

So if he is “in pain,” it’s not your fault by any means. You have obviously just made him all hot and bothered. To relieve that, fool around with him.

What He Said:

Just Do It!

How do you prevent your man from getting blue balls? You drain them. On a regular basis. I know, I know, you’re not always in the mood. Maybe you’re never in the mood. Maybe he’s let himself go or maybe he’s not flirting with you or romancing you like he did when you first started dating (or before you got married).

Long term relationships are about doing things you hate because you know your other half likes or loves them. Just please them. I know you make not like oral sex or you may not be turned on enough for intercourse, but so what? Did your partner really want to spend Christmas with your family? Hell no! They hate your family! But they did it because they want their balls to be drained.

Romance is for short term love affairs. Sooner or later it goes right out the window and if it’s never happened to you, you’ve never had a relationship last long enough. If that’s you, consider yourself lucky.

You’re probably thinking “hey wait! They’re not doing [insert random sexual or non sexual task/think you really like]! Why they hell would I please them if they aren’t doing what I want?

It’s simple, grasshopper. If you help them, they will do what you want. Having sex will scramble their brain and reduces any resistance to suggestion that they have. You won’t have to tell them to do what you want. You can imply it and they will snap to attention, even if you don’t scramble their brains by giving them all the oral sex, anal sex or plain old intercourse they can handle.

Why? Because if you’re screwing them eight ways to Sunday, and you ask them to go to Starbucks and get you that half double cap red eye latte that makes them cringe when you order it, are they really going to say no? No, they won’t. They will get you your stupid frilly over priced coffee drink. Why? Because you’re screwing them! A lot!

No one is dumb enough to walk away from an ATM that’s spitting out free money. So you will get your damn latte. Or your foot massage. Or someone to cuddle with while you watch Oprah or Jersey Shore or whatever it is that you love to do that your partner would rather take a cheese grater to the genitals than participate in.

It’s a win win, right? It’s a little counter-intuitive, I know. It really doesn’t make sense. You probably think I’m crazy. Or you will, until you try it. Then you will tell anyone who will listen what an incredible genius I am (it’s true. I am a genius. Literally and figuratively).

If you do this, you will have the partner of your dreams! You’re place will never be cleaner, you’ll never be happier and it might just save your relationship! Sound hokey, no, no it’s not. Sex is like the canary in the well of your relationship. If that’s great, so’s the rest of your relationship.

Now, of course, you should be getting yours. If you have to drain your partners balls whenever and wherever, they should be helping you too. You need to get yours. You will. Because they’re getting theirs.

What She Said (For Girls)

1.    Thou Shalt Bring Protection

You can buy condoms anywhere and they are super easy to carry around with you. Do it, keep them close at all times. You might also want to bring a small tube of lubricant around with you.

2.    Thou Shalt Get Off

Just because it’s a hook up, and men have been known to wham bam and thank you ma’am, does not mean you can’t “rock, sock and thank you jock.” You have every right to tell him what you need, where you need it and not to stop.  Or climb on top and take matters into your own hands.

Basically just because you are a woman doesn’t mean you can’t get off too. Use sex toys if you have them or if he has them, but remember to put a condom on them.

3.    Thou Shalt Not Leave Anything At His Place

Especially if it is intentional!  If you think that by leaving your earrings or panties etc is a hot move it is not!  Guys see through that.  They think you are either desperate for another romp, or careless. Be discreet, aside from a few scratch marks, you should leave nothing at his place.

4.    Thou Shalt Suggest Breakfast In The Morning

Maybe you know of a great diner near you, or he knows of one near him.  Regardless if the night ended well, why not refuel.  Who knows it might lead to a little afternoon delight.

5.    Thou Shalt Not Be Forced To Cuddle

If you are staying over, or he is staying at your place cuddling is not a given.  You should not feel obligated to be the little spoon nor should you feel that he should spoon you. Sleep how you would if you were alone, but seeing how you two just shared fluids, you should make sure you share the covers.

6.    Thou Shalt Not Expect A Relationship

Sometimes hook ups end up being more, sometimes they are all they need to be. Either way, enjoy the moment and don’t expect anything out of it.

7.    Thou Shalt Make Sure He Is Single

Don’t be that girl!  Even if you don’t know his girlfriend, respect their relationship.  I don’t care how hot the guy may be, he is obviously a scumbag if he is ok with cheating.

8.    Thou Shalt Have A Morning After Outfit

Keep an extra pair of jeans, t-shirt and shoes in your car.  When you are in casual clothes, the walk of shame becomes just a walk.

What He Said (For Guys)

1. Thou Shalt Text The Morning After, No Matter What

It doesn’t matter if you regret it. Or if it was bad, or if it was good, but you never want to see that person again. You should always aspire to leave someone better than you found them in all circumstances. Hooking up is no different.

The morning after text, if you will, is part of that. Being used in a fun way is one thing, but just plain being used is not fun. This is especially important for guys to remember.

For women, sex is a choice, for guys it’s a chore. If you leave this girl on bad terms, you’re not messing it up for yourself, you’re messing it up for every guy that will come after you. So be classy and master the art of the dismount. Or none of us will get laid ever again.

2. Thou Shalt Be Realistic

This is basically just sex, and by basically, I mean totally. It’s not a romantic comedy. It’s not going to lead to a wonderful romance with the person of your dreams, at least it’s not likely too. You want some ass, they want some ass and then you can both meet in the middle.

Don’t get all Oprah on them. Don’t’ ask about their puppies or their childhood or what they like to do when they’re not having sex with you. They don’t care about your background and you shouldn’t about theirs.

3. Thou Shalt Not Worry About Them Getting Theirs

One of the nicest things about hooking up is that there’s no pretense about it. You don’t have to pretend to care about them, or their feelings, or whether they get off. Get yours and getting theirs is their problem.

4. Thou Shalt Think Of This As Batting Practice

You may not care about the person you’re banging randomly, but there will come a time when you meet someone you really do care about and maybe even love. You might want to spend the rest of your life with them.

What She Said:

Every Woman is Different

Some like sex fast slow, hard, less hard etc. It’s impossible for a man to instant know EVERYTHING that a woman likes in bed even if you are getting sex tips all the time. But if he pays attention to her while in the act he can pick up on what’s working at what is not. One thing that a lot of women hate in bed is “Everything that you “once saw in a porno.’

Porn sex is not like real sex. Just because Misty McBigbush likes you to pull her hair while you slam into her doggie style, does not mean the girl from accounting is going to like that. Porn is super over the top in the sex movements and the sizes of woman’s throats.

That being said, if she wants to take your penis and put it in her mouth, you don’t have to grab her by the head and thrust it down her throat. That might make her mad and you are in no position to have her bite you.

A clue to see if she likes what you are doing is to watch her body. If she likes what your tongue is doing between her legs, she will make noises to let you know and most likely buck her hips towards you.

If she doesn’t like it, she will squirm away. Her voice is also key to whether or not you are hitting her sweet spot. Moaning and heavy breathing is a huge thumbs up, and if you hear a “yes” your golden.

She also hates sleeping in the wet spot. WE are adults we know if happens but please have the decency to lay down a towel and sleep on it yourself.

What He Said:

Don’t Rely On Porno Moves!

The truth is the biggest lie porn has ever told is perpetuating the myth of the female orgasm. We all know it’s not the role of women in sex to enjoy it. You’re just supposed to lay there and pretend it’s not happening, because either

A) We’re going to buy you stuff to get you to lay there

B) We already have. So seriously, just lay there and go to your happy place. Is that so hard?

It’s actually quite simple. Women will never tell you sex tips verbally, but they can’t help telling you physically. If she makes a face that looks like she’s constipated and stepping in dog crap simultaneously, you should probably not do that ever again, and work quickly to recover.

You may crash and burn several times, but be willing to fail. If she really likes you, you’ll get another chance and as long as you show improvement or a willingness to improve, you’ll get another crack at it and by “it” I mean, well, you can figure it out.

She may not tell you what she’s into, but just figuring out from body language what she doesn’t like is a huge help. Once you cross that off the list, then you can move on to what she is into.

Even if she’s the type to tell you straight out that you’re hitting the spot, if you’re doing it right, she will probably be too in the moment and wrapped up in pleasure to really communicate. If you’re doing it right, it should seem like your having sex with a person currently consumed by demonic possession.

Nice girls will suddenly shout out curse words or dig their nails into your back. Atheists will start talking to God, but not actually say anything to God, only repeating God’s name over and over and over and over. It may freak you out, but just go with it.

Even if she’s not talking, she will often guide you. If you’re performing oral sex on her, and she holds your head in place so you can’t come up for air, this is a good thing, if she lets you up to fuck her, well, maybe not so much, but you probably already know what she’s into on a gut level, you just have to tune into it a bit more. But it’s worth the practice.

1. The Sensual Type

The sensual woman is an emotional creature and sex is a pure expression of her love for you. She adores the exotic when it comes to exploring the finer things in life, so don’t be surprised if she enjoys feeling champagne bubbles on her skin or the taste of fresh fruit and chocolate during foreplay.

2. The Erotic Type

Eroticism is defined by its intensity. An erotic libido demands the extraordinary – something breathtaking and adventurous. This woman probably won’t turn down “ordinary” sex, but to really grab her attention it needs to have that spark.

3. The Dependent Type

A dependent libido understands sex as a way to relieve stress and relax. A woman thus inclined is likely to become upset and frustrated without frequent release, but may not always be willing to initiate. To avoid the cycle of abstinence – then fighting over a lack of sex drive – then make-up-sex release, you may want to try adding some other regular physical activity to your routine.

Try going for hikes or playing a sport together to invigorate that competitive spirit and warm up your bodies, minds and emotions before letting go.

4. The Reactive Type

This sexual personality is rarely aroused before their partner. They will almost never instigate sex through foreplay, but can have an active sex life if their lover takes the lead. It can take a lot longer to get things going, but don’t fret! Showing and telling your wife how turned on you are by her is a surefire way to ignite her flame.

5. The Entitled Type

Hopefully neither you nor your wife fall into this category. This kind of lover doesn’t really believe they have any responsibility to pleasure their partner, or believes their skills are better than they truly are, and so feels as if they are entitled to receive pleasure but don’t actually give any back. This type of lover holds and resonates loving sexual energy, but never replicates or reciprocates it. In short, the entitled libido is selfish, ignorant or both. It’s time to do something different, right?

6. The Addictive Type

This kind of person tends to get sex-obsessed. It is an absolutely necessary component of their day-to-day lives, often to the detriment of other areas, including relationships. Addictive lovers are prone to cheating and may have a difficult time maintaining relationships if they cannot overcome their emotional dependence on sexual pleasure. Discovering their true sexual and emotional potential will help them recover from addiction and learn to enjoy a healthy, regular sex life without feeling desperate.

7. The Stressed Type

A stressed out lover is no fun for anyone, so if this describes you or your wife, some immediate change is necessary! This kind of libido is going to be very low, because sex is an uncomfortable event filled with anxiety. Pressure to perform and worries of inadequacy make true intimacy nearly impossible. This person needs to do some real soul searching and work towards coming to accept their body and having their body accepted by others.

8. The Disinterested Type

Sometimes the result of past sexual distress, sometimes the product of a very low libido, some men and women are just not very interested in sex and orgasm. This, of course, does not mean they don’t enjoy intimate touch! Some women do not enjoy the thrusting of a penis inside them, but instead find great pleasure in oral sex, mutual masturbation and the skillful manual manipulation of a coochie connoisseur, and don’t mind reciprocating for an eager lover.

9. The Detached Type

A detached lover doesn’t necessarily dislike sex, but rather tends to forget about it when it is on the back burner. Even if they feel sexual, they may tend to spend a few minutes with masturbation rather than initiate sex, because of the time it would take away from the things currently occupying their mind. With this kind of partner, it can be important to make dates.

Take time away from the TV, the computer, Addictive lovers are prone to cheating and may have a difficult time maintaining relationships if they cannot overcome their emotional dependence on sexual pleasure. the kids and the kitchen; turn off the cell phones and lock the doors (or better yet, go somewhere special away from it all!) and get your minds focused on each other.

10. The Compulsive Type

Folks with fetishes and problems with chronic masturbation tend to fall in this category, where sex is only really enjoyable if they are able to follow a specific ritual. This need is often psychosomatic and can easily be adapted to work in a relationship.

Most women who are only able to achieve orgasm through one specific act or movement can learn to achieve orgasm in other ways if the sensation is altered over time – in other words, if you spend enough time fingering her while she uses her vibrator, she can probably learn to orgasm just from your hands, without the use of the vibrator!

A woman comes home from work and tells her boyfriend that another co-worker is driving her crazy. The man tries to solve this issue for her by giving her suggestions, such as “just talk to her about it”, or “go tell your story to the boss.” But women don’t want solutions, they want to express their feelings to “get them off their chests.”

So how can you apply this to attracting women? If you understand how women think, you are much better able to communicate with them on their level, or “speak the same language.” You will also not have to deal with rejection.

1. Answer Questions With Questions

Often men make the mistake of bringing up topics like,

“I went to X school…”
“I live in X city…”
“I work in X industry…”

Many men meet women and then use these topics because they run out of things to say. Big mistake.

How can you tell that you’re doing well with women? When they start asking YOU these questions. There’s no point bringing up these topics before they’re really important. Do you really want to know the occupation of the guy passing you in the street? Most likely, you don’t care.

Well, women feel exactly the same way.

Unless a woman is already interested or curious about you, she won’t ask these questions. This is where you can build tension without much thinking. Answer her questions with questions.

2. Be A Blank Canvas

If she knows nothing about you, she’ll want to know something.“He was amazing! But I don’t know anything about him. Where does he work? How old is he?”

Why do we do this? Because the more a woman needs to fill in the blanks, the more she’s thinking about you. The more she thinks about you, the more she’ll like you. Singles are more likely to be interested when they do not know anything about you.

3. Don’t Give In To Her

After a woman begins to show interest she may say things like, “Do you like my hair?” “Why would you do that? Is it because you don’t like me?” This is where most guys crumble while they are flirting.

Never give in to this. Instead, brush off her questions and never directly answer them. If a woman says, “Oh, I can’t believe you did that! Is it because you don’t like me?” and you say, “No, no, I do like you, I’m sorry.” Bam! You’ve just lost the upper hand and the woman has found out exactly what she wanted to know.

If you want to keep women interested, you need to keep them curious and keep them guessing. You can do this by putting down her comments. These questions present a great opportunity to build tension by teasing her further. “Do you like my hair?” “No, not really.” “Why? Are you trying to bring the 60’s back into fashion?”

“Do you like my hair?”
“Well, do you like it?”
“Why do you want to know?”

After you tease a woman about her dorky hair, walk, tag sticking out of her jeans, or whatever it is you have identified to tease, she might respond with a test like “Oh but you love me anyway!” As a general rule: never say “yes.”

4. Don’t Lose Her Interest

Many women stop being interested in men once they find out the men like them. This is a solid fact that I can verify. Many women I’ve spoken to say they lose interest and stop calling men once they know the men like them.

“Awe… but you love me!”
“Do I?”
“Is that what you think?”

If the woman asks personal questions, answer them with sarcastic and humorous answers

What’s your name? How old are you? These questions women are most likely to ask when they’re interested in you.

Men will then usually resort to tedious factual answers with bad body language that will not lead to the kind of flirtatious exchange that engages a woman’s attention. It’s not that these questions are bad – they just shouldn’t be used in a first encounter.

When women hit you with standard questions like these, it’s a good idea to have cheeky indirect answers ready to throw back at them. Playful and absurd remarks work the best. Here are some examples of better responses:

If you don’t talk in a playful tone of voice you’ll come across as serious, arrogant or just weird and you will never get a first kiss. On the other hand, if you answer her questions playfully with logical answers you’ll seem childish and feminine. So make sure your comments are both playful and absurd.

Of course you can’t keep this charade up forever, but by answering her questions in a funny way, you show her that you have a fun personality and don’t take the date too seriously. You can always answer these questions later if they keep coming up.

What She Said:

Should You Have A One Night Stand?

A one night stand sounds like a hell of a lot sexier in movies than they are in real life. For women its not always as great of experience as it is for men. And usually there is a lot of alcohol involved. Yes, a stranger’s body can be thrilling and the idea of “using” someone can feel forbidden but the majority of the time that strangers body isn’t being used to please you.

If you are new to ONS and your sexual past consisted of committed relationships or even friends with benefits, then before embarking on a one-night stand you need to prepare yourself. One of the best sex tips is to mentally prepare yourself. Women often blur the lines between sex and emotions.

Know what you are doing and know that a ONS may not leave you with a feeling of fulfillment that you were used to in other relationships. Also, prepare yourself with protection. Bring condoms!!! Make sure your heart, mind and body are ready for this. You know yourself best.  Many women are able to separate sex from love and have a grand time doing it.

But if you are going to part take in your first ONS, be honest, know that there may not be fireworks, it may be super awkward and you may have regrets the next day.  All that being said, if you are ready and prepared then by all means, hit it and quit it!

What He Said:

Decide For Yourself!

Sex is like pizza. Even when it’s not that great it’s still really nice to have. Is it better when you’re in love and with your soulmate and your having that Sting and Trudy tantrically infusing nine hour marathon sex session? Sure. But if you meet some guy or some chick at a bar and you have a hot and heavy ten minute sex session and you used protection, this can be great too.

Condoms? Those are for sailors. 

Chuck Norris might not approve of one night stands, but why not? Yes, avoid the alcohol filled ones. Not just because the performance of both of you might not be so great, but those are often the hookups where condoms and other safety mechanisms get left by the wayside.

If you want to get good at having one night stands, it’s really quite simple. Go to a bar where you don’t ever go in a different city or neighborhood and have sex someone you would never ever want to see again, no matter how good the sex is. Stay sober. Go back to their place. Take a cab. Have really hot sex. Do not be there when they wake up. Don’t give them your real name.

I have a friend who takes this to a crazy level. She has wigs, glasses and fake names and even accents. Even if she went to the bar she always goes to no one would even recognize her. She finds that this randomness leads to better sex.

I don’t know what the point of this is, but it’s never stopped me before. If you are into this, go for it, if you’re not, you’re not. But don’t rule it out unless you’ve tried it. Sure girls tend to be more emotionally driven when having sex so many tend to prefer in relationships. A preference based on experience is one thing. A preference based on dogma that was forced up on you is an entirely different thing.

Whatever you want to do with one night stands, yay or nay, is totally cool. Just make sure you’re the one making those decisions. And just because you decide to bang lots of random people doesn’t necessarily mean you will get an STD, but it does mean you need to be really, really careful and secure your private parts like they are a crime scene on CSI. More sex can mean more exposure to risk, so you need to take that into mind before you take that hot piece of ass home with you.

Be open, ask your wife which of the many techniques that she has experienced turn her on the fastest. Don’t worry about her finding the question awkward; she’s been waiting to hear it from you for years, but you haven’t afforded her a safe place to be explicitly asked about this delicate issue.

Knowing that she has an easier time coming all by herself, it can be easy to feel rejected and replaced. You’ve heard that old joke, right? “Why did God create man?” “Because a vibrator can’t mow the lawn.” That may be true – I’ve seen some pretty ridiculous contraptions in my search for sexual fulfillment, but none that could cut the grass!

But for women, sex isn’t a separate part of our existence. Lust isn’t distinct from our love and respect for you. These emotions intertwine and are incredibly complex. Here are 3 sex tips for better relationships.

1. A Vibrator Can’t Cuddle

Yes, sometimes when we are hot and bothered, when we need to relax and focus or fall fast asleep, masturbating is preferable. Sometimes we all just want to be alone – you too, right? But there is a clear distinction between the easiest way to orgasm, and the most enjoyable sexual experience. Sexpert Tracey Cox points out that “there is a reason why we jump through extraordinarily complicated hoops to not only make someone like us, but lust after us – it might be harder to have an orgasm with another person but it’s usually far superior quality.”

2. Throw Out the Calendar

What kind of hoops have you been jumping through? Sex schedules, couch cuddling sessions, couple’s therapy, a bevy of skills workshops – your brain is probably so full of new techniques that it’s ready to explode! Throw out that calendar. Women want the type of orgasms that are hot, exciting, intense, and don’t interfere with their afternoon workout and getting dinner on the table! The only way to ensure you are prepared for hot sex is to master one mind-blowing skill at a time.

3. Be a Musician, Not a Technician

You’ve warmed your wife up and she is primed and ready with you between her legs. As one hand heads for her soft bits, you run down the list of techniques to try in your head. You are so preoccupied with what’s next in your arsenal that you can’t really tell if she’s enjoying herself or not. You don’t bother to ask, because you’re too concerned with transitioning into the next move, and acting out the lie that you’re best for her as a “strong, silent type”.

A technician keeps a list of jobs he needs to get done and checks each one off in a row, making sure he hits every point until the machine in front of him is “fixed”. While an indispensable part of being a good man in day-to-day life, darling, this is not a sexy skill. Kim Cattrall writes that “the musician who never gets past technique never really plays music”. You need to be fit and finessed enough to know a few techniques really well when having sex. When you are a master at making love, you can have dozens of skills in your arsenal, but only when you can do them all well.

What She Said:

Hair Down There

I’ll never forget when I was 7 yrs old and found my parents’ 1969 Joy of Sex book.  Till this day, I can still vividly picture the naked hippies and the massive amounts of hair that surrounded their genitals. I still have nightmares.

In this day and age we have come a long way with lasers, razors and waxes. For girls, there is no fun way to remove hair. Lasers can sting and be costly. Razors, although cheap, can be dangerous. One wrong wrist movement and bits can be cut.

And with razors there is always the grown in hairs, thicker hairs etc. That being said, maintenance is totally worth it! Not only does it look better, but also less hair makes it easier for your lover to find your clitoris.

And you and your lover can play the game of “Landing Strip” or “Tortilla chip” depending on the shape you want to leave your hair in. Going full on hairless is also sexy; there is something erotic and naughty about it.

Guys need to do their part in the manscaping department too. They don’t need to go bare, but for the love of God please keep it under control! No woman wants to end up flossing with your hair! And besides, a trim can make your penis appear bigger!

What He Said:

A Little Maintenance Won’t Hurt

I know there’s a lot of weight behind this “pro-bush” movement these days, but I’m just going to say it: only terrorists and weirdos are in favor of hairy lady parts. Yes, terrorists. If you don’t go bare, the terrorists win. True story.

Seriously, though, all women should be totally hairless from the scalp down. There is no logical reason to have any hair down their except that you’re part of Al Queda. I’m sure Oprah will tell you that all women are beautiful exactly as they are, but that’s simply not true. 70’s bush is just not sexy.

It wasn’t even sexy in the 70’s, but guys were given that to have sex and they didn’t really want to, but they did want to have sex, and everyone had fros back then. Girls even had fros covering their naughty bits, and men had fros surrounding their wedding tackle.

Ladies should be bald down there. It’s just plain hot. I can’t tell you why, but who cares? It’s wrong and it’s naughty and it makes us guys want to spend lots of time down there. And isn’t that what women want?

Yes, the landing strip is nice and slutty too. And who doesn’t like women being slutty? Nobody. That’s who.  Still, I vote full commando, instead of the landing strip. I mean, if you’re going to do it, why not do it right?

Manscaping is all the rage and frankly I rage against that machine. Men are supposed to be smelly and hair and dirty. The way God intended. Sure you get a few hair balls when you give us a blowjob, but that’s just part of the battle scars that come with performing oral sex on a man properly. Wear those hair balls in your teeth with pride knowing you did a job well done.

Though a little scissoring down there never hurt anyone. As long as you do it right. Sharp objects and the male genitalia generally don’t go together. I know women will say men are wusses for being afraid of this, but who the hell are you? You have an innie, we have an outie! Totally different ball game. Literally.

Be careful when you prune, or trim or whatever you want to call it, but never ever go full commando. It’s just not hot. I don’t know why it’s hot when women do it and not guys, but it’s just one of those things we can’t pull off. Maybe because it’s attached! Zing. Seriously though, trim but don’t shave it all of. It just isn’t right.

What She Said:

Chat With Your Man

First thing to do is have a chat with your man. We women are emotional and if our guy is turning us down, we take it personally. We think he is cheating, or doesn’t find us attractive. But before you jump to conclusions, you should see if maybe your guy is stressed, or over worked, or maybe he has money issues on his mind, or career problems.

All these outside forces can affect his libido and have nothing to do with you! Instead of holding a grudge, talk to him.  See if something else is on his mind and explain to him your needs. If he is not in the mood, tell him that you aren’t looking for a hot sex marathon, but a little hanky panky would be fun.

Masturbate For Him

Even some cuddling can be amazing; women want to feel closeness with their guy, that doesn’t always-necessary mean sex. If it is the big O that you are looking for and your guy is not in the mood, why not let him watch you please yourself? Who knows, the visual might be all he needs to revive him and have him give you a hand, or penis.

What He Said:

Make An Effort To Turn Him On

Of course women want it more than men, they don’t have to do anything. All you women have to do is lay there and pretend it’s not happening, which you’ve been practicing for centuries. Then he rolls off you and he buys you something. It’s a good deal. There’s no pressure.

A guy has to perform. Literally. And double standards and unreasonable expectations used to be things that society only heaped on women. It was a kinder, simpler time, when men where men and women were the ones slitting their wrists if they couldn’t fit into their skinny jeans or if their man was banging someone else.

Now men have to deal with that stuff too. How messed up is that? What’s worse, now that women have their own money, they have their own power, now their acting just like men expecting more and more of their partners.

Don’t Put Too Much Pressure On Him To Perform

Yes, porn, cock rings, Viagra and all that jazz are great, but maybe make sure he isn’t feeling burdened or pressured. Maybe he can’t fuck all night long. Maybe he only does it in between commercials. Maybe he feels insecure about his penis size, or how long he lasts, how hard he gets or whatever.

Let him know it’s all good, and you’re not expecting anything other than the good loving he is known to deliver. If there’s pressure or stress on his mind, do what you can to alleviate it. A lot of it is out of your hands, to be sure, but whatever you can do to lighten things up, the better.

Taking the pressure off is huge, but so is turning the heat up. Take him to a strip club. Get each of you a lap dance. Take him to a yoga class and dress super sexy. Go to the beach, spend time at pool or hot tub. If you can afford a weekend getaway, do it. That alone can be huge in getting the boom boom back in the bedroom.

Sometimes the act of physically being in a new place makes the mind feel like it’s physically separated from the problems that a person’s going through, despite the fact that they are in their own head.

Let him know quickies are all good, buy some Kama Sutra books or porn, but be advised that it may take a bit of effort to get the sex life ramped up how you like and one partner may still have a stronger libido than the other, but hopefully, if you’re patient and persistent, you’ll be having sex on a more regular basis.

Your First Time

When you were still a languishing virgin, curiosity took over your hormones. The desire to make a man out of yourself was evident every waking minute. You’ve heard that sex felt great – and even though you lacked a legitimate point of comparison, you knew it was going to be better than anything. If porn can feel that good, how much more if it were real breasts in front of you. The bulge in your pants seems to agree.

You need to learn how to do it right. The drive may be natural, but the quality is not. You need some experience under your belt. You need to be closely acquainted with your tools, learn about your girl’s body and how it works, and discover her preferences.

Sex Is Partner Specific

The manner and style will differ from woman to woman. This goes beyond body type, bust or booty size. It’s as unique as the two individuals engaged in it. And if you think all sex is the same, you’re unnecessarily lumping incomparable experiences – seeing the big picture and missing a woman’s idiosyncrasies.

It’s a woman’s sexual personality, the mixture of her naughtiness and innocence that makes her incomparable. It’s the way she shocks you with the things she calls, “Normal”. It’s the exquisite way she does you and the way she reacts to your moves. It’s the level of spanking she can take, or the depth her mouth can take your penis.

It’s in the manner she holds your tool when she gives you head and the smile on her face when you kiss. It’s in the exceptional tightness of her embrace and the way she rubs on your face every time you eat her.

Of course, there will be similarities. You’d go crazy if every time you do it, it’s all new and strange. But the similarities don’t really disturb us, do they? It’s the anomalies, the differences between women that keep us on our toes. These differences lie on the details. The devil is in the details.

Make Adjustments and Refinements

That’s why when it’s your first time with a certain woman, it feels like you’re a virgin all over again. The excitement may be familiar, but her body and sexual personality are not. You’re commencing a journey of discovery. Initial difficulties are okay, and adjustments & refinements have to be made.

That’s what happens when two people learn to adopt and adapt to each other. It’s okay if you don’t rock her world the first time. It’s not a rejection of you, it’s merely an indication that you need to learn something. Tell her that you want to master her and she’ll gladly assist you.

Do Not Slide Back

Men have a strong tendency to forget what was taught and return to their old ways. Be forewarned. When she teaches you something, burn it in your head. Schooling you once is already hard enough, doing it thrice is really just nagging. Keep learning, and keep the learning. Something wonderful happens over time, you start having better sex.

You get better. You’ll be the authority on what turns her on, the virtuoso on what gets her off. You’ll make her body squirm with delight. You’ll have her preferences down pat. Life will be good!

And when that time comes, don’t be so stuck up. When you think you’ve mastered your woman like your favorite RPG game, remember that there’s always something to learn. Even if she’s shouting your praises on a 3-block radius – there’s always room for more wonderful things. Always.

Don’t Put Too Much Focus On Intercourse

Being a great lover you is about being able to please a woman. It’s all about her orgasm first. You must be able to bring her to climax before you. Then she’s going to want to bring you to climax and the sex is going to be that much better.

Too many men focus on the intercourse. They’re all about being good in the intercourse part, you know, good in the dynamic part of sex. A lot of men spend too much time researching sexual positions: how to flip a woman over and how to do it from behind and what the best missionary positions are.

And that’s all great. Understanding all the different positions and different moves and how to stimulate the g-spot are all fantastic. These are all things that you need to know to be a dynamic lover.

It’s All About Mindset

If you haven’t figured out by now, life is 100% mindset. When a man meets a woman for the very first time and there’s sexual energy between the two of them, it’s not just about what you’re going to do with them physically, it’s all about the foreplay ahead of time that really drives a woman wild and actually drives the man wild too.

When you’ve got a lot of mental foreplay with somebody, it opens up a whole new world of sexuality. A lot of men and women don’t understand the art of talking dirty, or how important it is to really bring somebody to orgasm. But more important, a lot of men don’t realize the emotional connection that women need to have. Because men tend to think with their little head, and women, well, they have a little head too, but their little head is so small they don’t really think with it.

Use Her Emotion

In order to massage a woman, in order to get her to really open up sexually to you, you need to be able to understand the way that she is wired emotionally. I’ve said so many times that women are like giant a giant clitoris. If you go in for the kill right away, they’re basically going to be shut down.

You’ve got to learn how to open them up. You got to learn how to really become a dynamic lover, because that is what they’re looking for. It’s like licking an ice cream cone. Spend the time to savor each and every drop.

Becoming the most dynamic lover is not just about physical. It’s about understanding her emotional core for then seduction and teasing her. Learn how to control your mindset, learn how to influence hers, and you’re already on your way to becoming the best lover possible.

There’s a female comical recognition when a punch line tags the guy who explodes a mere 13  thrusts into the game. But for our purposes here, we’ll look at “Going the Distance” (GTD) beyond the superficial issue of premature ejaculation.

Get Fit NOW!

It’s not a far out question, is it? In case you didn’t know, sex is very physical. Intercourse is intense. It’s ugly. It’s fierce. Your pupils dilate, your heart pounds so hard and threatens explosion, breathing gets heavier and labored by the minute, body temperature rises to fever pitch and you sweat like you’re on fire. Muscles tense so hard they feel like concrete, your brain lights up like a thousand Christmas trees, and you thrash around, contending with another human being who’s exhibiting the same symptoms.

People die during sex, you know – and it’s not just the battle-tested elderly. Learning how to last longer in bed requires a consenting body. If you can’t even support your own weight, how far do you think will you go? How long will you last if after a few maneuvers, you’re already panting and teetering on an asthma attack?

If you want to go somewhere, you better be fit to go. Settling for less, because your body won’t allow the naughty things in your head, is indeed a sexual tragedy. Especially when you know you deserve to enjoy so much more.

Use Intense Workouts For More Stamina

So shape up! Run like hell. Bike. Get to a gym. Consult your doctor first if the need be. Get fit, eat right! You’re flooded everyday with health information and you actually already know what to do. You just have to get into doing them. (Don’t even try to make your age, schedule or lifestyle be an excuse.)

Good health gives you more sexual options. You don’t know the number of grossly obese people who settle for sex positions just because it’s the only one left that doesn’t pose serious health risks. You don’t know the number of men who fear that a heart attack might be around the corner every time they get their grooves on – living with the constant fear their corpses would be found at a nearby motel and blasted on the evening news. Being healthy simply makes sense, because if you’re dead, you can’t do it no more! No, the dead don’t score!

Visualize Sex Beforehand

Sex is not only very physical, it’s also very mental. How you VISUALIZE better sex will often find itself manifested in the real thing. How you think about it will ultimately be reflected in your style.

Check your imagination; you need a mind that sees beyond the obvious, a mind that can think in ways novel and exciting. GTD means constantly creating, improving and breaking routines. It’s being able to think about sex beyond the bed, the bedroom, penis & vagina and ejaculation. Mentally going the distance means applying your creative energies and discovering that sex is so much more than what you originally thought it to be.

When you see a made bed or a kitchen table, what do you really see? How open and ready are you to engage in the world of sexual positions, sex toys, fantasies and activities available for two horny consenting adults? The limits lie only in your head, in your imagination. Sex is mental, and you got to see it in your mind first before you see it manifested.

Pay Attention To Her Body Language

A woman’s body language (and her moans and groans) are your best guide during sex. When you pay attention to her body language, she will show you the way and tell you if you’re doing her right, instead of swinging from one extreme to another. Keep an eye and an ear on what she’s doing and how she’s responding, so that when you’re having sex you can tell what she likes and what she doesn’t.

Look For The Optimum Point

This is home. It’s where things simply flow and sex is “WOW!”  The OP is the zone of leverage – the zone of perfect sensations. Below OP, you get meager result. Beyond it (when you’re doing too much or stay in the same spot for too long), you have diminished effectiveness. One might think that things get better beyond OP. No it doesn’t, in fact the opposite happens, you get diminishing returns. Just because you’re pumping faster and harder doesn’t mean she’s getting happier. Stay at OP – no more, no less.

Be Just Right

It’s the point in clitoral stimulation for example, where you don’t go too slow or too fast. It’s the duration of hot sex where it’s not a quickie but also not a death-defying marathon – it’s what women refer to when they say “just right.”

Discover Her OP

OP’s vary not only from woman to woman but even in the same woman. That doesn’t make your job more difficult, it only makes it more challenging. I’m sorry to tell you that finding OP is not something you can read on a page. To cater to YOUR woman and give her better sex, you’re going to have to learn HER specific OP.

Play around and try different speeds, different strokes and different things on your girl. Since you’re the one in the room with her, you can observe her reactions – her body will talk to you, so listen to it!

This is never automatic, and like many things in life, it’s not mastered by simply sitting around and reading e-books, it’s honed by reading bodies. That means you actually have to dive to the trenches, commit the mistakes and learn from them, only then can you become a master. People have a word for it; I think they call it PRACTICE!

What She Said

To Bone Or Not To Bone?

As much as guys love the movie Glory, they do not wish to turn the bedroom into a war zone.  But many women find that when they are on their period, they are also hornier, and orgasms can help with cramps during their time of the month.  To bone or not to bone while bleeding is something that both partners need to agree upon.

If a woman feels like the period makes her gross, then there is no way she is going to feel sexy.  And if her man finds it a bit off putting then again, the woman will not feel in the mood.  If it is a red light for a couple, there are tons of other things to do!  Massages and blowjobs are top on my list. Now if the couple is OK with it then having sex can be super fun!  Some sex positions are limited due to gravity, but I recommend laying down a towel to catch any mess or better yet, hit the shower!

What He Said

The No Fly Zone

I am proud to have coined a new, sexy, and appropriate term for this time of the month, and I’m sharing it with you now: “No Fly Zone.” It makes it seem like some sexy military type operation instead of, well, you know. 
Can you do it during the no fly zone?  If you’re married and you know that she’s not sleeping with anyone else, then sure, I guess it’s safe.

But my own personal sex tip here is that you should avoid having sex while she’s in the “No Fly Zone.” I’m pretty sure if you look up “high risk sexual activities” in the dictionary you’ll see a picture of having sex on your period and then the dictionary will actually smack you upside the head for being stupid enough to even consider it.

Have you not heard of blowjobs or anal sex? Those are perfectly viable and deliciously naughty sex acts that you and your partner (or whatever the hell you call them) can do while you wait out the “No Fly Zone.” The “No Fly Zone,” like all other sanctions, seems really terrible and oppressive for a few days, then it blows over and then everyone pretends like it didn’t happen in the first place.

The “No Fly Zone” has been a thorne in the side of people (metaphorically speaking) since the beginning of time. Millions have tried to work their way around it, and basically you aren’t going to discover anything that others haven’t been able to. Remember that there are other alternatives such as anal and oral sex for him.

If you have never been that great at giving this kind of pleasure, there a few things that you can do in order to increase his amount of pleasure. Here are a few ways that you can easily give your guy the best handjob of his life.

Find The Best Position

Finding the best position for the handjob is essential. You need to determine what hand you are going to use during the deed. Are you right-handed or are you left-handed? Some women find that giving it with their left hand, while actually being right-handed, gives their guy more pleasure. Determining the hand that you are going to use for the job will give you a better perspective on the kind of position you want to be in. This sex act can be used in a variety of positions.

You don’t necessarily have to be on top of him in order to give him a great manual orgasm. Try having him stand in front of you while you sit at the edge of your bed. You can also have him get on top of you and straddle your stomach. If he gets on top of you, he will be able to finger you at the same time.

Use The Right Lube

Lube is going to be essential for all handjobs. When you were first learning about jerking a guy off you probably did not use things such as lubrication or lotion. Using your hands on his penis can easily make foreplay even more erotic for the both of you. Even if you are just going to use your hands to give him an orgasm, the less resistance that you have on your palms and fingers is going to make it feel better for him.

Using lube can also lead to more pleasurable sex if the occasion arises. Don’t just focus on applying lube to the shaft or head of his penis. Make sure that you are also using lube on his balls. This will give him extra sensation.

Grip The Penis The Right Way

While guys love a tight vagina, handjobs are going to be a little different. Your hand is much more firm than the inside of your vagina. When you’re giving him manual stimulation the last thing that you want to do is cut off the circulation to his penis. It doesn’t matter how much lube you use, gripping him too tightly is not going to be comfortable for either of you. A lot of women complain that their hands and their wrists get tired.

Keeping a looser grip will not only increase his amount of pleasure it will also keep your hand from dying out. Grip his penis like you would a cup. You would not hold the cup so tight that you start to bend it and you shouldn’t do this with his penis either.

Invert Your Hand

Invert your hand the next time that you are performing this act on him. Pretend that you are holding a cup of water in your hand and pour it into the sink. Your hand should now be inverted. Use this grip style on his penis right before he starts to orgasm. This is one of the best techniques to giving your guy a multiple orgasm during a handjob. While it may not work the first, second or third time, at some point you will be able to give your guy a multiple orgasm through this technique.

Find The Best Speed

The speed at which you go during the handjob is essential. Some guys like their handjobs fast while other guys like them really slow. In order to gauge his response mix it up during the experience. It’s always recommended to start off slow and work your way up to a gradual speed. Some guys like the motion to be fast right before they have an orgasm while other guys like slow and steady motions throughout the entire act.

Ask him what he likes in the moment and use a little dirty talk. He should tell you exactly what he wants. Asking him what he like during the act is another way to get real feedback of what he wants and how you can improve.

1. Foreplay The Right Way

Kissing is the pretext to all sex. While kissing a Chump might keep kissing a girl until she pulls away. A Champ might kiss a girl, then pull away, then go to kiss again, then pull away RIGHT before. Women LOVE these little teases. Don’t be surprised if she grabs you and kisses you even harder when you do this one!

2. Don’t Go Straight For It

So while a Chump might be so happy to be having sex with a woman that he goes straight for it, a Champ gets his girl so hot and turned on first that she is literally BEGGING! After she gets down to just her underwear and you are in yours, take your soldier, put it on the “area” and begin SLOWLY going up and down. Do this while kissing and alternating between her lips and her neck

Keep doing this for AT LEAST 10 MINUTES! Add to the tension with dirty talk. I know it sounds like a lot, but she will LOVE this and it will get her super turned on. Take off her panties, and take off yours. Put a condom on, but don’t go straight for sex! Keep doing what you were doing, but do not enter her! At this point she’ll probably start grabbing at you. Smile and say “not yet!” then keep doing what you are doing. Then, after she is bucking her hips and DYING to have you, put in just the tip. Take it out and go back to dry humping.

Do this a couple more times and then, put just the tip inside.

3. Count Your Strokes

Okay, now what you’re going to do is count your strokes. Give 9 really shallow stroke and then one REALLY DEEP ONE! Go to 8 shallow strokes, and 2 really deep strokes. Then 7 shallow strokes, and 3 really deep strokes. By this point she’s going to be going CRAZY. She will be begging you to give it harder! But don’t give in. Give  6 shallow strokes, and 4 really deep strokes. Keep doing this until you are all the way to 1 shallow one and 9 deep. Then, count backwards! 8 deep strokes and 2 really shallow strokes. 7 deep strokes and 3 really shallow ones. You get the picture.

When you get back to the beginning, it’s time to give hard! She will have the best orgasm of her life!

Women LOVE this teasing method. It’s one of my best secrets and I wanted to share it with you because the secrets to getting and keeping a 10 don’t stop when you get into the bedroom. If you end up being one of the 200 guys who get a spot in my Get The 10 program, you’re going to be finding yourself in the bedroom with some VERY hot girls.

There is a difference between having good sex and enjoying amazing sex. Good sex is one that gives you that pleasurable feeling of being erotically fulfilled. Amazing sex, on the other hand, involves more intense lovemaking and evokes tantalizing moments of hot passion that is truly unforgettable.

It is clear which kind of sex men and women would love to have. If you want to ignite sizzling fireworks in her, there are a few simple tips that will bring a whole new level of excitement into lovemaking that both you and her will truly enjoy and savor. Try these for good measure!

Discover Her Body Before Sex

Lovemaking will soon become a humdrum affair if you let things stay the way it is today. But you can bring her to the heights of sexual ecstasy even without engaging in any sexual intercourse. In fact, it is better that you enjoy each others’ bodies without penetration. The key lies in bringing your imagination to the forefront and getting a little naughty and provocative, if you will.

Bring on some “erotic aids” to the bedroom – chocolate body paint, blindfolds, feathers, massage oils, handcuffs etc. Use these to discover and explore her body and bring her to a suspended state of ecstasy though playful teasing. Many couples reported that they had the most sensational sex just through this journey of erotic discovery!

The “Fantasy Box”

Every woman has her own ideas and fantasies about the perfect sex – one that she is probably too shy to bring it out into the open. To keep her on the erotic edge all the time, ask her to write down her fantasies on one of those small post-it pads. Drop them into a small box and tug it away in your bedroom. Every now and then, when you want to sizzle things up, just dip into the box, retrieve one of these and relive her fantasies on the spot!

Sexy On The Outside Means Sexy On The Inside

Know what is the easiest way to hike up her sexual desires? Make her feel sexy about her body! Many women feel somewhat shy or even conscious about their endowments and body contours. Get into a bubble bath with her and give her some erotic massage on her back.

Buy her some sexy lingerie, put them on for her and compliment the way she looks. The soft silky feel of the lingerie on her skin and the words you speak to her can make her feel a lot sexier and help her loosen her own inhibitions in the sack. Well, when she starts feeling a little naughty, you will be in for some fireworks for the night!

Do you really know what women want during sex? There are too many women who complain about having bad sex instead of experiencing the heavenly pleasures of lovemaking. If you don’t know what women really want in bed (or think you are clueless), here are things you should keep in mind if you want to give her an amazing time in between the sheets.

1. Smell Good

A foul-smelling body can be a real turn-off in bed. Even if you have a body-odor that you THINK is appealing, get a shower! You should be smelling fresh and clean in bed, not like a caveman waiting to devour his prey. Now, if you are expecting her to give you great fellatio, the last thing you want her to remember is smelling bad down there.

2. Erotic Massage

An erotic massage can work its magic on a woman like no other. Women love to be pampered by their men and massage is a great way to heighten her sexual senses. Put your hands to good use after a bath together and give her a good rub on her back and thighs. This will be a great prelude to a night of passionate fireworks.

3. Assume Dominance

Even the most sexually adventurous women would love their men to be bold, dominant and sexually confident. They want you to set the pace and intensity when you make love. Take charge and try new things together, with one thing in mind: giving her an awesome orgasm that she cannot refuse.

4. Cuddle With Her

Don’t head off to sleep straight after a lovemaking session! Women are emotional beings. They want to feel special not just during sex, but after sex as well. A good cuddle will make her feel wanted and appreciated for who she is. Believe me, this can work magic into a sexual relationship. Most guys don’t do this at all. Be different, and she will likely let you go for round number two.

5. Be Ready For The Next Round

Well, you may have seen this coming, don’t you? Most women don’t request for a second round. But if the first one was so good – especially if you have given her an exquisite orgasm – be prepared to have a go at it again. Grant her this wish. After all, it simply means she adores you and she loves the way you make her feel.

6. Keep It Up

Need I say more? A rock hard erection will get any woman going. It shows how turned on you are by her, and epitomizes your desire for her. So give her the most amazing night ever!

How Does Sex Get Boring?

First, let’s look at how something as wonderful as sex becomes so pathetic. It has a lot to do with settling down – settling down to habits and set expectations.

As we said of most sexual relationships, knocking boots begins hot, hot, hot! Life was good, it was freakin’ good! Then, it kinda gets simply warm – still nice, but not as hot as before. Then, after some time, sex with the same person loses much of its initial appeal. It gets colder and colder. Soon it gets so frigidly cold, nobody wants to shed their clothes anymore!

One of the suspects could be monotony.

How Predictability KILL Your Sex Life

Sex habits and predictability aren’t bad in and of themselves. When utilized properly, they afford stability in sexual relationships by creating an atmosphere that’s both familiar and safe. This is the good light of them.

What’s wrong with doing what you love over and over in the first place? Your fave sex positions, even foreplay mannerisms, all reflect personal preferences – and you love them because they have worked for you in the past. Blending them into an evening of pleasure makes for efficient & effective sex, and proficient & competent partners. – UP TO A POINT.

Trouble begins when, after discovering what works, couples become one-hit-wonders and stop trying out other stuff. They become so engrossed with what they like and get too lazy with the rest. Before you know it, they’ve been doing the same thing for the last 35 years!

A sex schedule for example, can be helpful, but if it kills all the spontaneity, then it can also work to your disadvantage – sex becomes predictable. Habits make that which is wonderful look so ordinary and mundane – robbing it of its appeal. Throw in laziness & apathy and you have a deadly combo.

And here’s the kicker – predictability suits men.

Why He Loves The Monotony

Guys love efficiency and predictability in getting their orgasm. But oftentimes, the same can be flat out disadvantageous for women, so that while a man may be enjoying a sexual custom, your girl could be harboring a loathing for it.

Habits, even the good ones, have the tendency to degrade into its core elements (i.e. penetration & ejaculation). While in the past, it may have worked just fine, it can degenerate over time. It used to be good when he used to engage her in finesse foreplay, penetrated her with gentlemanly flair, and finished her off with his tongue. (In this context, the habit works for the couple.)

But over time, the kisses, caresses and eye contacts diminish ‘til they become ancient history. Now, only penetration and ejaculation elements remain and what used to be hot and passionate has gone tasteless and dry.

Beat predictability to death and it will eventually kill your sex life. Can you now sense the potential dark side?

But can you also see that you can do something about it?

Heat It Up!

The most powerful aphrodisiac in the world is not a plate of oysters – it’s NOVELTY. It’s the allure of something new, something unknown and something you may never have done before. It’s the freshness of the unfamiliar, the excitement of not knowing what’s happening, or the vagueness of it.

It’s the newness of things that make intimate encounters both exhilarating and refreshing. Do you know why romantic-scented-candles-and-sensual-music set-ups work? Because they don’t happen every night. They require work, so men save them for special occasions.

Watch what happens when such romantic gestures happen on a nightly basis. Right! The sweet set-up gets old, no matter how grand they may be. Suddenly, the scented candles cease to be so “Awwww,” they become signs of a gross inability to pay electric bills.

Habits serve well by keeping us from stumbling in the dark, but sometimes, human beings need to stumble in darkness to see the light. Sometimes we need unpredictability and unfamiliarity in order to feel alive. Come to think of it, these standards don’t really improve our sex lives, they merely make it stable. “Stable” is usually not enough, and oftentimes, it gets mistaken for “boring.”

But you should know that falling into some sort of habit is human nature, everybody yields to it. But just as everything else, there exists in our nature a counterpoint that balances our fondness for habits and stability – that’s our desire for novelty.

Trying New Things & Using Your Imagination

Novelty is the perfect antidote. When sex becomes a stale act, give your vintage moves a rest and bring in SOMETHING NEW.

This “something” could actually be almost NOTHING. For you’re not required to radically alter sexual practices, it just takes little touches to spark erotic encounters to life. Don’t think extreme, excessive or extravagant. If you can enrich just a tenth of the experience, she’ll love it – a single touch technique for example, can make a huge difference.

This “something” could be ANYTHING – even something totally unrelated to sex. (And I want you to really open your eyes for this one.) Just as anything in a room can be a deadly weapon – telephones, vase, pillow, keyboard (depends on how you use it and where you strike), anything can be a sexual weapon. Anything at all!

For example, a piece of smooth stone may have nothing to do with sex, but under the hands of a creative lover during an erotic massage, it can do magic.

And so we arrive at the concept of PERSONAL CREATIVITY.

As always, everything starts in the mind, with YOUR IMAGINATION. A lot of imagination is rendered next to useless in this world of comfort zones. You are lounging everyday, carrying the most exciting and insightful sexual ideas in your head. Free your imagination, let your regular thinking patterns, your normal, your usual take the first beating.

But do it in your own pace.

You and your girl will have that initial hesitation reminiscent of human beings trying out something new. But that’s okay. It’s totally understandable, part of the charm actually. And when it works, it works! If not, then move on to a thousand other things.

Creativity is the super highway to novelty. It is the blank check with which new sexual experiences are written. Creativity looks at a woman’s body in a different way, frames sex into new exciting perspectives and reveals avenues and alleys before unnoticed.

It diversifies sexual practices into variations never even thought probable. And the beautiful thing about it is unfettered creativity ALWAYS WORKS! It never fails you when you give it a chance. It keeps trying ‘til it hits pay dirt. CREATIVITY is innovative, imaginative, artistic and resourceful.

Imagine this situation:

You’re really excited. You find her hot. You find her sexy. Things are going well and it looks like you might “get lucky.”

And then you start thinking to yourself, “Am I going to be able to please her in the bedroom? Am I going to be able to be the most dynamic lover she’s ever had? Am I going to be able to bring her to multiple orgasms until she begs me for more? Am I going to be the man that’s her best lover ever and is she going to be willing to do all the things that I want done to me?”

These are questions that haunt a lot of men on a regular basis. Men everywhere want to know how to unlock her sexual code and how to make sure that she begs for more. Let me tell you how.

Emotions Play A Significant Role

There’s so much mindset to sex that a lot of men don’t pay attention to. A lot of men are very physical; when they’re attracted to a woman, all they want to do is rip her clothes off and penetrate her immediately and have incredible intercourse that’s going to blow their mind away. But they don’t understand the way women really think.

Somebody told me a long, long time ago that if you can please a woman in bed—and it all starts with pleasing her emotionally first and really connecting to her emotionally—she’ll do anything for you. She’ll truly believe that you are the first man to be attentive to all her needs, the man that understands her on all levels.

A lot of guys don’t think that way. A lot of guys just want to go, get a woman in the sack, have sex with her for five or six minutes and hope that she gets off. Those moans and groans that you hear when you’re banging her are not necessarily moans and groans of pleasure. They’re moans and groans of disappointment, a disappointment that you are not taking the time on her the way she needs.

It’s all about understanding the way a woman’s mind thinks when it comes down to sex. You’ve got to understand her emotional core, what she needs. She needs to feel safe, she needs to feel the attraction, and she needs to hear words.

“You look hot. You’re beautiful.” Say it, whatever it might be. She needs to feel like you’re there, in tune with her. She may want to warm up to you, and spend the time kissing. And if you want to become a good kisser, mimic her kissing style. If she comes at you with a soft tongue, come back at her with a soft tongue. If she comes at you hard, come back at her hard.

Teasing Is Pleasing!

It all comes down to teasing her body and not going immediately for the clitoris or finger banging her immediately. It’s all about taking your time almost like you’re driving down a long, winding road. You want to be able to spend as much time on her body, teasing her.

You also don’t want to sleep with her the very first time you get her naked. You want to drive her crazy. The more you drive her crazy, the better the sex is going to be for her.

It’s all about understanding her need to feel safe and secure. She wants to give you her body. Too many men do not understand that. They don’t spend the time on the mindset of sex. All they do is think about the physical side of sex. If you think about the mindset, then you think about licking her like an ice cream cone, spending the time to savor each and every drop.

Becoming the most dynamic lover is not just about physical. It’s about understanding her emotional core and then seducing and teasing her. If you’re able to give her what she’s always desired when all the men before you have disappointed—you win.

How Do You Best Distinguish Between The Two?

“Just sex” usually takes place outside the context of a loving relationship – one-night stands for example. People get horny – so they get laid, it’s that simple. Men and women use each other to get an orgasm or two. Motivation is mostly physical and very little, if at all, emotional. In fact, emotional entanglements are avoided and little consideration is given to the partner’s enjoyment.

“Making love,” as especially seen by women, is more romantic – more tender, respectful and considerate. It’s what lovers do. The people involved have feelings and emotional investments on each other. Motivation is both physical and emotional.

• If lust shoves the penis down her throat, love slides it in while caressing her cheek.
• If lust ejaculates on her face, love is kissing her tenderly.
• If lust is fast, short & furious, love is sensual, slow and romantic.
• If lust is purely physical, love is largely emotional & psychological.
• If lust is penile penetration, love is penetration – and more.

Are There Any “Gray” Areas?

Although at first glance, the two may seem like night and day, but there are actually a lot of gray areas between the two. Differences can be very subtle and one could argue that they’re really one and the same. The two cannot be objectively evaluated in terms of actions, and it’s not as if they are mutually exclusive. There isn’t really much difference in terms of actuations.

“Making love” can be passionate as well as fast and furious. “Just sex” can also be sensual and slow. People in loving relationships can have sex just for the heck of it. And even one-night stands can come with romance, albeit not very often.

Pay Attention To Your Emotions

It’s in the perception and interpretation of the players. It is FELT, not seen. It is in the individual to perceive whether what’s happening is simply lust, or a combination of lust, like and love or something else.

If a woman interprets things one way, then that’s what it is! If over time, she changes her mind, and develops feelings and sees the two of you as ‘making love’, then FOR HER, it’s making love.

If it’s “just sex” to you, then FOR YOU, it’s just sex.

What If You’re Not On The Same Page With Your Lover?

Unpleasant surprises arise when partners’ views don’t match. She’s making love, and he’s just in it for the sex. And because they have differing perceptions, they consequently have incongruous expectations and behaviors. She expects him to be generous and loving, but since they’re not on the same page, he might not be those things at all!

A great lover avoids unnecessary complications by making sure they’re both on the same page. Playing with women’s emotions is NOT cool!

Women want men to understand one simple reality – that sometimes, she’s just not up for it, and it’s nothing personal.

Sometimes sex can be the last thing in a person’s mind. Hey, even guys in their sexual prime have those days when they’d rather be alone, get some TV time and cement that butt impression on their couches. Sometimes a deluge of projects and deadlines can drown little Johnny’s screams for action. Of course, women have these days too! (Plus the PMS. Well, some have PMS the whole year!)

Have Excellent Timing

This is simply knowing the difference between a good and a bad time. Jerks who march up to her in the middle of the night, all hot & horny, a little drunk and expecting some action, would be better off couching with their blow-up dolls. If they’re going to be Mr. Wrong Timing, they might as well be masturbating!

A 6th sense is needed to develop timing and it takes a balancing & gauging act to know the difference between a genuinely bad, hopeless sexual situation, and a massage-able/negotiable one – there are no hard and fast rules. Your ability to calibrate will improve as you get to know your woman.

Master The Art Of Gentle Persuasion

Great lovers master the art of gentle persuasion and subtle influence. They don’t decide for women, they gradually encourage them into a decision. A little look here, a little touch there, a massage packaged as time-out from her stressful schedule – and she’s bound to come around. It will only be a matter of time before she caves in and melts into his arms – it’s magic.

Set A Woman At Ease

Set her at ease. Clear the way for her brain to focus on your caresses instead of on last week’s deadline. A woman at ease is in a state of openness – to anything – sex included. And that’s way better than having someone wary of your moves. Anything you do to an inattentive (or defensive) brain might as well amount to nothing.

Second, ease her into sex. Before you know it, both of you will be sweating it out in the kitchen. It just happened. Unfortunately, many guys make this too difficult. Instead of creating that “in the moment phenomenon,” they get pushy, rude and crass. They pressure, which only emboldens her defenses.

They might eventually be forceful and strong enough to get what they want – but the next time around, it’ll be doubly hard. They’ll be fighting unnecessary battles just for the lay – not to mention, accommodation sex won’t be as satisfying.

What’s a woman to do? Over time, she’ll cut the sex short by faking an orgasm. Then later, she’ll block the sex altogether with every excuse.

So set the lady at ease, and ease her into knockin’ boots with you. Make it an easy and obvious decision, then give her a great time so she’ll want to do you over and over. This is the simplest prescription for your recurring sexual droughts.

For You To Not Ask Her What She Wants

She doesn’t want you to ask her what she wants for Valentine’s Day – that’s a huge faux pas. What that says to her is, “I don’t care to know enough about you to make an educated guess as to what you would like for a gift.” That is so lame! This is something you want to avoid at all costs. Don’t discuss Valentine’s Day with her. Don’t bring it up. Don’t ask her what she’s getting you. Let her think you’ve forgotten! Just whatever you do, plan your gift without her help!

If you’re really stuck on what to get your girl, ask her best friend for a hand instead. That’s what they’re for and when your partner finds out you enlisted the help of her BFF, that’s major brownie points for you. Just don’t be the one to tell her – let the friend tell her during a meaty gossip session. You can pretty much count on getting laid for awhile after that.

For You To Have More Than One Gift Planned

You do not have to spend a lot of money to make this happen! Most guys who don’t forget Valentine’s Day entirely will get one nice gift that will be graciously accepted. However, remember that part about how she doesn’t want you to ask her what she wants? How she wants you to already know what she wants? Apply that here – she wants you to know what she wants so much that you have multiple ideas and couldn’t settle on just one. Yes, that’s actually a secret fantasy of hers.

Again, this doesn’t have to be several gifts persay. It can be a love coupon book with a treasure hunt with sweet notes leading the way to find it, paired with a romantic home cooked candle lit dinner at home, an erotic massage and incredible sex. See? That’s like 7 presents and would easily take up the better part of the afternoon, evening and night. And it would cost you about $20. For all of that. Not even kidding. She wants you to be creative enough to plan not one, not two, but as many incredible, creative, sweet and romantic things you can think of. They can cost hundreds, or they can cost exactly zilch. 

No “Useful” Gifts

Yes, she may have been needing her brakes done for awhile or really needs a new electric mixer, but that does not mean that these are acceptable Valentine’s Day gifts. In fact, these are really bad ones! The entire point of Valentine’s Day is frivolity – meaning, that for this frivolous holiday, you need to choose frivolous gifts. Get it?

No Last Minute Gifts

Your partner also doesn’t want you to buy a gift last minute. Even if you think you totally slid by and got an awesome gift, she’ll be able to tell that you forgot about Valentine’s Day until the last possible moment. This screams irresponsible and inconsiderate to her! She’s likely been planning your present(s) for days or even weeks, so if you go out the day before and get her a stuffed animal and chocolates from Walgreens, you are most definitely going to insult her.

Take some time to plan nice gifts, or a romantic date. If you’re not creative and have difficulty coming up with something on your own, plan to have enough time to do a little research.

Chores!

Above all, your lady wants you to get up off your butt and help her out with cleaning the house! As in, right now. If you want to make your chore gifts into a coupon book, all the better. But this Valentine’s Day, make an effort to have the dishes done before she comes home from work, or take out the trash without her having to ask.

Better yet, call in sick for the day while she’s at work, and surprise her not only with a sparkling clean house and dinner, but decorated with balloons and candles. Believe it or not, this takes very little funds. You can have the house dripping with “Valentine’s Day” with $30 or less if you put in the effort.

And there it is, fellas. What does she really want for Valentine’s Day? For you to do something that makes her feel like she was totally worth the effort.

1. The Lotus Position

Even though this is considered to be a pretty basic sex position by most seasoned sex gurus, many couples haven’t tried it. If you and your partner haven’t, consider yourself all set for Valentine’s Day! You’ll get to try a “new” sex position with your girl, but it’s one that won’t leave her feeling cheap and used.

If you have used it before, that’s okay. It’s still great for Valentine’s Day because it involves lots of cuddling and face to face intimacy. Yep – Valentine’s Day is all about the romance. That doesn’t mean it stops as soon as the sex starts. Your job is to carry it over and make getting it on with your lover as romantic as the rest of your gifts.

2. Reverse Cowgirl

Okay, you’ve done the lotus, you’ve had lots of cuddle time and have romanced your girl until you’re blue in the face. You’re both ready for some action! Throw caution to the wind and put your lover in the reverse cowgirl position. This is an excellent sex position to use because not only do you get an incredible show, she gets friction on her clitoris from your scrotum, bringing her closer to orgasm than with other sex positions.

Why This Will Work On Valentine’s Day

She knows she’s going to be having sex on the 14th. She’s had it in her mind for weeks. She’s likely bought special panties or a lingerie set already. There’s not a snowball’s chance in hell that she’s gone “au natural” on the big day. You can bet your bottom dollar that she’s clean, trimmed and prepped so as to be “ready” for anything on Valentine’s Day. Use this to your advantage.

Reverse cowgirl is one of the sex positions that women will engage in only if they’re comfortable enough with their bodies and only if they’re super clean and trimmed or shaved down there. A woman is not going to put herself on display for you like that unless she’s totally confident that she looks good.

3. Spooning

Again, while this is a widely used sex position, it is an excellent choice for February 14th because it involves lots of romance and intimacy. You can kiss and caress your partner’s ears, neck and shoulders while you slowly penetrate her from behind, while running your hands all over her breasts, hips and finally resting on her clitoris.

Not only will this sex position make her feel super loved and cherished (which is a total turn on for women), you can also help her reach orgasm faster by fingering her clitoris – just make sure you use lube!

4. Yep…Missionary!

Believe it or not, missionary is probably still one of the best Valentine’s Day sex positions out there. Yes, it’s completely played out. It’s been done and done again, and it’s become the running joke of sex positions couples who have really boring sex lives use. But that’s definitely become the stereotype of the missionary position – that doesn’t mean it actually is boring.

The truth about the missionary position is that it is what you make it. If you think it’s going to be boring, it’s going to be boring. If you instead allow yourself to live “in the moment” and savor each and every sensation you experience – from the sights to the smells to the tastes – then you’re going to have fantastic sex, and it won’t even matter what position you use!

Make missionary sex incredible this Valentine’s Day by making it sweet and romantic. Engage in lots of foreplay first. Give her oral sex so good, she’ll think you’re in love with going down on her and aren’t ever going to stop. By the time you get to actually doing it in the missionary position, she should have had at least one orgasm, if not more. Then, penetrate her slowly and let her excitement build again. Have sex life a masterful, skillful lover and she won’t even care that you used the missionary position! In fact, she’ll be glad she didn’t have to re-enact yoga positions while naked on Valentine’s Day!

Learning how to be better in bed is not just about knowing new techniques and sexual positions (although those help a lot too). At its most fundamental, enjoying a fulfilling night of lovemaking simply involves helping your lady relax and finding total comfort in your company. And one of the simplest things to do to deepen your sexual intimacy is by creating an erotic ambiance and touching her the right way. This article will show you how in four enjoyable and easy steps!

1. Find Some Place Comfortable

Most couples find great privacy in their own homes, and in particular, their bedrooms. Take a warm shower together to condition both your minds to relax in each other’s presence. Then set her down on a soft rug with cushy pillows so that her body is nicely cushioned. Play some soft, romantic music in the background and light some scented candles to create a really relaxing ambience.

2. Release Her Inhibitions

Let her wear something light and soft, preferably a lingerie or nightgown. Get her to close her eyes while she is lying down. Alternatively you may want to blindfold her. Many women are able to totally free their sexual inhibitions and become far more responsive when blindfolded.

3. Begin Serenading Her With Your Touches

When she is totally relaxed, you may begin physical contact with her. Start with light touches, focusing on her non-sexual areas first. For instance, tenderly touch her toes with your fingertips then slowly move on her more sensitive zones such as her inner thighs, tummy and her neck. Hint: never start groping her right away at her most sexual places!

4. Watch Her Reactions

Pay close attention to how she is responding to your touches, then change your approach accordingly. Does her body feel relaxed or tensed up? If she is too relaxed, you could firm up your touches on her; if you sense that she is too tensed, go easy on your touches and caresses so that you can slowly build her up through light foreplay. Also observe her breathing patterns and if she is making any noise. If she is clearly enjoying the moment, her breathing should be getting heavier.

Every woman is different. It may take some time to explore her body and learn exactly what makes her tick in between the sheets. Use this simple exercise to learn how to relax her mind and body, and get her primed for a night to remember!

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What Does It Take To Be Great At Lovemaking?

A great lover’s heightened sensuality is his ace. He understands what the senses are for and rouses them with full abandon. He offers stimulus bombardment and makes a woman feel so alive. With him, she experiences excitement, exhilaration, romance, danger, passion, even cluelessness. With the sensual one, sex becomes something else entirely.

The boring dude, his antithesis, couldn’t even stir up emotions and he barely knows how to touch – he thinks sex is a penis and vagina affair. He’s so dull and mundane, being with him is like watching paint peel.

So take your pick – do you want to be sensual or boring? One type of guy gets laid much more than the other.

Can you guess which one?

Mastering Your Senses

But to be a sensual lover, you need to forget about learning “sex tips” and instead, master your senses. Not just during lovemaking, but in daily activities also. What you are in daily living easily translates in the bedroom. You can’t live a hurried and harried existence and expect to be a sensual phenomenon in bed.

Don’t go running around and missing the stream of stimulation life offers you. A high-paced lifestyle may accomplish you a million things, but it makes you default on 10 million others. Speed makes stimulation dissipate rapidly giving the brain no chance to process it. Result? No perception.

Imagine driving your car at 100 miles per hour. Look out the windows. The view moves so fast so you can’t really see much, you’re bound to miss on some important details. You could have missed “the-one-that-got-away,” the woman of your dreams, walking her poodle on the side of the road. So she got away – again.

Now, imagine driving at 20 miles per hour. Notice that things become clearer this time. You see that girl from years ago and scheduled a night out with her. You see the coffee table and bargained successfully for it.

It’s a totally different ballgame; it’s a totally different life! All because you moved slower. No, this is not a motivation to be late for meetings or miss your deadlines. This is a call for AWARENESS – honing your senses and connecting with your surroundings.

Sometimes, this requires some slowing down.

How To Slow Down And Take Stock Of Everything

Go to your kitchen. Open the refrigerator, take out a fruit. (Notice how cold that thing is?) Wash it. Now, close your eyes. Close them shut. Hold the fruit near your snout and give it a whiff. Smell its essence.

Next, with eyes still closed, let your teeth slowly sink into that thing. Have a bite, feel every fiber snap with the force of your mandibles and let nature’s juice cascade into your tingling tongue. Savor every drop. Is it sweet? Sour? Bitter?

How was it?

When your eyes were closed, all visual concerns ceased – you were able to zero-in on smell & taste. Did you notice how these senses became more potent?

That’s the power of focus. When a sense is completely blocked, you experience an instant upgrade on the others. The remaining channels become more lucid and clear.

How To Translate This To Sex

People close eyes when kissing not only to avoid cross-eyes, but for a more intense preoccupation of the liplock. This also explains why sight-impaired people have elevated sense of hearing and touch – it compensates for the lost of sight. That’s why Stevie Wonder has one of the sharpest ears in the music industry.

Train your senses in a similar manner. Block stimulation from one, and focus on another. For example, mute the TV and notice an increased ability to read body language and facial expressions.

Or listen to the TV like a radio and notice the range and tones of people hosting a talk show. Close your eyes and get a whiff of that hot pepperoni pizza. It will make the whole eating experience a thing of beauty.

Once you start doing this on a daily basis, you will start doing this while having sex as well, without even thinking about it. You will automatically close your eyes and breathe in your partner’s scent and taste. You will automatically begin to savor every sensation and you’ll be going slow enough that she’ll be able to savor them too.

In essence, you will BE the sensual lover!

Are you having a hard time bringing your girl to a delightful orgasm every time you make love? You would be surprised how simple it is to give her the best sex of her life. While it takes less for men to reach a climax during sex, it is an entirely different matter with the ladies. To allay your fears of your girl feigning her orgasms all along, make sure you give her the real deal, with no ordeal! Here’s how to bring your lover to a climatic, heart-thumping experience every time you have sex!

1. Dirty Talk!

Words are your best ally in making her lust for you. Combine both dirty talk and romantic words to produce a potent effect on her. With your well-chosen words, you can make her boil with anticipation way before you even set a finger on her. How do you do this? Simply let her know the things you like about her, particularly about her body and sexuality. Admit with no hesitation how well she switches on your buttons! She will be blushing and turning hotter every minute.

2. Touch Her Everywhere

You should pay attention to her entire body – shoulders, ears, back, hair, between her breasts, inner thighs, forearms and her other hot spots. She will love it when you hold her hand tightly. Treat her as if she was the most precious person in your life. It will heighten the excitement and her sense of pleasure. Whenever possible, look into her eyes longingly.

It will bring both of you closer and heighten the whole sexual experience. Follow up the touches with massages and gentle caresses to help her relax even more. Try to be as natural as possible. Your moves should come across as smooth and gentle. Your patient foreplay and gentleness will build her trust in you. Your passionate and loving touches will seal her trust for you.

3. Appreciate And Tease Your Girl!

Women love to be appreciated. Unlike men, women often cannot separate the act of love with their surroundings and greatly attach emotional intimacy to lovemaking. Therefore, take advantage of that by playing the part well. Be that “one in a million” great lover and surprise her and build up her excitement even more. Try to give attention to her “non sexual” parts as well; this will catch her off-guard and fill her to the brim with excitement and desire.

The idea of knowing your woman is enjoying genuine sexual pleasure and shouting your name with orgasmic glee is simply unsurpassed. If you want to be one of the lucky men who have their women’s happiness (and faithfulness) at their fingertips, read on to discover 3 tips on making you her only man – in bed and out of it!

1. Memorize Her Body

If you want to master anything, you have got to start by learning it. Memorize the location of her G-spot. Many chaps likewise fail to touch the clitoris in the proper manner. The only way you could satisfy her is by familiarizing yourself with her body. Touch her as often as possible and enjoy and appreciate how she reacts to your every move.

You might be surprised with the simple things that turn her on. More importantly, learn to enjoy lovemaking. It is not a race or a competition. So don’t hurry! Most women love a slow, sensuous build up in sex. Believe me, once you get her in the right mood, she will achieve an orgasms faster than you would probably imagine!

2. Drop The Same Ol’ Habit

If you are sick with the same old routine at your work, how more sick could your girl be with the same sex patterns? Test various positions and watch carefully for the slightest reactions from her. Women all have their adventurous side, so you better change your moves.

Try out various sex positions and see which one produces the best effect on your lady. Your woman would like your guts and be more adventurous herself! The more things you try out, the more you’ll get closer to a happier and satisfied relationship.

3. Stimulate Her MIND!

If you think arousal is only a matter of the body, you are wrong. Arousal involves the mind as well. Sexual intercourse would be more passionate if your minds and hearts connect as well as the body. What’s lovemaking without words of love? Words, as with many other aspects of life, are powerful. In fact, there are times when all it takes is a single word to make her go from lukewarm to burning hot.

It is truly a skill to know how to bring your woman to an orgasm using your words, so start learning how to do so! If you learn to seduce her mind before and during sex, it will amp up the level of enjoyment for the both of you!

Don’t Make Him Lose His Orgasm Buzz

Everything that you do in bed, before, during and after intercourse, all matter and contribute to whether or not your man enjoyed himself to his fullest potential. If you even do something that turns him off in the slightest bit, chances are that is the only thing he is going to focus on. There could be a million positive things that you were able to achieve in the bedroom with him – like crazy awesome sex positions – but if you do one thing that rubs him the wrong way, that is going to be the one thing he remembers.

Why Acting Right When You’re Done Is CRUCIAL!

The turn offs that affect him the most usually come on after sex. After nookie is when women start winding down and maybe saying or doing stuff that they don’t mean. This is not a time to shut off the charm and shut down in the bedroom. What you do afterwards is important and affects your man tremendously. You don’t want to ruin the moment by doing something stupid do you? You don’t want to ruin his buzz by doing something that you are later going to regret do you? This is why you need to learn how to behave in the sexiest way possible to keep that orgasm buzz alive and well.

There is so much sexy stuff to do after getting it on that will help him to marinate in that moment and relish in it for just a little longer but that is not what we are focused on. You know what is sexy after sex but what you don’t know is what ISN’T. There are 3 rules for how NOT to behave after sex that all women must learn and you are going to get that insight right now.

1. Don’t Ask Him Questions

Right now, your man’s body and mind are starting to shut down. An orgasm takes a lot out of a man and leaves him feeling very weak. He is tired and starting to fall asleep. The last thing he wants or needs is you sitting beside him asking him a million questions. NEVER ask your man right after sex how it was for him or if he liked it. If he is lying beside you, breathing heavily and sweating then let that image speak for itself. Learn to garner some confidence within yourself and trust in your abilities to please your man. Trust in the fact that he did love it and don’t bother asking for reaffirmation. You know how annoying that is when he does it and how much of a buzz kill that is. Don’t do the same and follow suit. Instead, look over at your man in his sweaty glory and know that is all because of you.

2. Don’t Cuddle Immediately

Of course, it is natural for women to want to cuddle after sex and to feel that close bond intensified. However, men don’t feel the same way. Right now, his body temperature is off the charts and all he wants is to cool down. He doesn’t want your warm body on his warm body right way. He is going to need a minute to collect, maybe use the washroom, grab a drink and then he might want to cuddle, but it is okay if he doesn’t. Don’t take this personally if your man doesn’t want to cuddle after intercourse. You wouldn’t want someone as equally hot and sweaty to roll over on top of you if you were feeling light headed and out of breath, right? So, be a strong woman and don’t cuddle up to him right away. Stroke his thigh, or his chest and leave it at that until he makes the move to cuddle up to you.

3. Don’t Critique Him!

This is the biggest rule of them all that women need to learn in regards to behaving after sex. The last thing you want to do to your man is completely shatter his buzz. If he did something during sex that you didn’t like or that didn’t feel good, now is not the time to give him the rundown on what he did wrong. Leave this talk until the next time you both get intimate or sometime over the course of the following day.

Drop it for tonight and deal with it later. You don’t want to roll over when your man is in his glory, happy that he had an incredible orgasm and that you did too, and tell him everything he did wrong. Wouldn’t it make you feel terrible if he did that to you? Something’s are just better left unsaid at least for a little while. Granted, if he did something that made you feel really uncomfortable or went against a rule that you two had in the bedroom, you should bring it up. However, if it is something small and you are holding onto some sort of a grudge, leave it.

Learn to enjoy your man’s company in the moment of after sex and forget all of the little stuff. A lot can be said with a look or a kiss after sex so keep it simple and don’t carry baggage into the moment. Remember, how you act after sex is just as important as how you act during. Don’t be a buzz kill.

Women Love Making Comparisons

They compare things like diamond sizes, or this year’s sales with last season’s – wishing to see who’s got the biggest stone, or the more elegant product line. (I told you they’re into details.) Most of all, women love weighing guys against each other when it comes to sex. Some are blunt about it, others are more sophisticated and subtle, but when they compare, boy, do they compare! They’ll weigh a man with just about anybody & anything.

Through comparisons, a girl fishes out who she considers the “best.”

What She’s Looking At

She’ll measure you against her ideal man – that perfect gentleman she’s been fantasizing about since she was 14. She’ll compare how you move, with how he moves. How you do her, and how Mr. Perfect supposedly does it. She’ll note every aspect of you and weigh it against her ideal. This of course, includes your penis size as well. Very easily, you will lose – you are bound to lose. (But don’t worry, if she cares enough, she’ll turn you into a project and begin changing every detail of your soul so you approximate her dream guy. Good luck on that one.) She’ll compare you with all the guys she’s ever had sex with – well, at least those she remembers.

So What About Sex?

There’s a hierarchy of guys in her head and if she’s been around the block more than once, she remembers the losers, the one-night stands and yes, even the breast masher. She’ll even compare her orgasms with you and those she gets via self-service – heck, she’ll even compare you with her sex toys. She won’t readily own up to these superficialities, she may not even notice she’s doing them.

But this does happen, and in this game of comparisons, it pays to be unique. The female brain is always on the prowl for something new, something different. The moment she realizes you’re just like the rest, she will brush you off. A girl can’t attend to every insignificant person that comes her way.

Her Emotions Are Involved Too (Of Course)

Her emotions will certainly command a big share of how she sees you as a bedmate. Everybody may see you as a pitiful excuse for a human being, and therefore a waste of skin, but if you’ve hostaged a woman’s emotions, everything and everybody else don’t matter. You may really lose all comparisons, but if she’s that into you, she’ll let you win! If she’s flushed with EMOTIONS, if she’s sooo head-over-heels, you could ooze with sexual lameness and she’ll still be adoring you.

Letting It Go And Being Confident

By the way, none of these comparisons and emotions thing is objective. They are never objective. Remember, people, especially women, are not logical creatures, although they’d like to think they are. You’re dealing here with judgments that can be muddled by her perceptions, expectations and preferences. (Come to think of it, who in this world is completely objective?)

Many guys ask me: Is it possible that one woman will judge you great in bed while another count you as average?

Of course! Knowing the nature of humans and sex, expect that. Nobody bats a perfect thousand. Accept that, have confidence in bed anyways and you’re golden.

When it comes to sex, nothing is bigger than confidence. Absolutely nothing. This trait alone will get you laid way more times than any god-like appearance.

He who feels he doesn’t belong in the same room or breathe the same air as a woman doesn’t deserve to get laid. She doesn’t want to be with a guy who fidgets like fish out of water, of course not! Insecurity is a turn-off worse than halitosis – it damns you by killing the mood and messing up your moves. A good lover doesn’t fluster his woman with any squirming or twitching, he comes to sex with no apologies, stands naked with self-worth intact, raw with confidence. He gets women thinking, “This guy knows what he is doing.”

Sex is something he desires, not fear – his confidence springing from a blend of knowledge and experience. He knows exactly what to do, and he’s done it many times – he exudes bewitching self-assurance.

How Confidence Manifests Itself

Imagine the bedroom is submerged in a swimming pool and the two of you are making love underwater. That’s how slow and smooth you should go – as if your body is moving through water. This says to a girl, “I have no nervous energy to dissipate because I am comfortable with the situation. You should be too.” It’s more relaxing than any nervous tick.

You can move faster as the sexual process unfolds, but never be in a hurry – that has always been the rookie mistake. Women don’t stay around with guys who act like someone’s chasing them, but they flock towards confidence. As I’ve said, the confident get laid way more than any ridiculously good-looking insecure guy.

What Sexual Confidence Really Is

Sexual confidence is simply knowing what you’re doing as a result of having (the right) sex tips and (the right) experience. That’s what it really boils down to. But these things won’t come knocking on your door, you’d have to grab them by the balls. That’s what you’re doing right now, you’re investing in the ‘knowledge’ part. As a result of the, you will know exactly what to do and will have the confidence leading your woman.

But sex is one of those things you master not by reading volumes, but by actually experiencing the dirty work for yourself. So go get some! Getting the right experience, I can only guarantee you one thing: you’re gonna have to pay your dues. You’ll commit mistakes – a lot of them. Now let me be completely clear. You can have one single partner your entire life and learn to be a masterful lover. You do NOT have to be with multiple women. In fact, that can be one of the biggest turn-offs to women – a guy who is “well used.”

You’ll crash, you’ll burn, you’ll be scratching your head in exasperation – well, maybe not that dramatic, you could simply be doing the moves and not getting the expected reaction. You waited for her to enter ecstasy, but she didn’t. She didn’t react at all.

What To Do When You Crash And Burn

How you handle situations like this will dictate if you will ever become great in bed. You need to be able to roll with the punches and not be bothered with disappointments. Don’t let them take you out of the moment and prevent your enjoyment of sex, don’t make a big deal out of it.

I have yet to meet a man who has gone on to become sexually confident but didn’t go through this journey of discovery. There may be shortcuts when it comes to sexual knowledge, but there are none when it comes to experience.

Honestly, this is the most exciting part of building sexual confidence – being in the trenches, learning and enjoying the process. As I’ve said, this is also the most decisive part, you could either get better over time, or your perfectionist and emotional tendencies could get the better of you and lead to a negative spiral where you get incompetent over time.

If I were you, I would just enjoy the process, NO PRESSURES.

Everybody wants to be like him, but who exactly is he? How does he THINK & MOVE?

What A Great Lover Is

Unfortunately, Great Lovers (GL’s) do not wear nametags. This is for personal protection against droves of women who wish to camp on their beds. One can’t spot GL’s by eye inspection, and you may have been in the presence of one in the past, but never knew about it. Don’t be deceived with what you see. Don’t look for great bods and gorgeous pecs, for GL’s are rarely these.

In fact, let go of all your physical biases. GL’s can be short, fat, trimmed or thin. Physical attributes have little bearing on this regard.

It’s their sexual programming that makes them gold. They are Great Lovers because of how they THINK, not because of how they look. Thoughts – the software of actions. We are moved by our thoughts, we move according to our thoughts.

How They Think & Move Differently Than Other Guys

How do they move? Great Lovers are never in a hurry, they are living for the MOMENT. The past is gone, the future is none, the PRESENT is all there is.

He’s the gentlest of all. There’s silent confidence blanketing the man with no performance anxieties, no pressure to blow the mind of any woman and make her scream to the high heavens. He’s in no mission to impress anybody, which is a major turn-on by the way. He’s confident, but not arrogant. He doesn’t assume knowledge of everything, but is eager to learn.

Others assert authority, power and domination, GL’s simply assume these.

Are they push-overs? Certainly not. They simply GET IT.

They Understand The Psychology Behind Sex

While most men go for the raw hump, GL’s realize that emotions are the most powerful tools in their arsenal. It doesn’t matter if it’s in the context of an intimate relationship or a one-night stand, when a girl is on his bed, she bathes in EMOTIONS. GL’s make women F-E-E-L.

Technique-wise, GL’s are known for their legendary TRANSITIONS from the SENSUAL to the SEXUAL. They’re so smooth, women can’t draw the line between foreplay, play and afterplay. Everything flows and they don’t strain towards making things happen. A GL transitions a girl into every gut wrenching position, without her realizing it. They don’t flip and pounce.

The sex lasts longer, not because he’s able to delay ejaculation, but because he knows other stuff besides thrust and hip movements.

Now, compare that to the workings of a gorgeous yet crude boy. If you’re a woman, who would you lay? Are you still wondering why GL’s won’t have to whine for sex? They rarely have one-night stands because their woman responds in hand and gives him no reason to go elsewhere.

Are they perfect lovers? Of course not! What makes them so great is their ability to positively differentiate themselves from 95% of guys who make love the exact same way.

Use Plenty Of Lube

Lube is essential for making your double penetration as comfortable and pleasurable as possible. When you are choosing a lube, make sure that it’s water-based. KY and Astroglide work best with toys and with a real penis. Apply the lube to your vagina and your anus, not just the men or the sex toys. Make sure that you’re not just adding lube to the exterior of your vagina and anus. The walls need to have a lot of lube on them prior to the objects entering you.

Relaxation Is Key

Relaxing the muscles in your anus will make the experience much more pleasurable. The muscles in your anus will naturally contract when the sex toy or the penis starts to go in. You need to learn how to relax the muscles so the toy or the penis can go deep. You will not get the same sensations if the penetrating object can only go in a half inch. Remember to breathe through the experience while keeping all of your anal muscles relaxed.

Consider Using Sex Toys

Sex toys can be one way that you have double penetration yourself. Using dildos, vibrators or butt plugs can make your first experience easy. Sometime it’s better to start out by yourself so you know what you like and how it’s going to feel. Bringing a partner or two partners into the mix when you don’t know if you’re going to like it could make the situation a little awkward. When using sex toys, make sure that you’re using the smaller toy for anal. If you have had a lot of experience with anal sex then you might not need to do this. However, if you’re a newbie to anal you could find a larger dildo very uncomfortable.

MMF Threesome

Many women find it extremely hot to have two guys taking her from both entrances. When you have two guys giving your double penetration, you must be safe. Condoms are a must and the best thing about them is that the condom will offer less resistance than an unprotected penis. When a penis is entering your body it could contract bacteria from your anus so do not allow the men to go inside your ass and then into your vagina. They must stay in the same hole to keep you safe. If you’re going with two penises in your vagina or anus, remember that there is an exponentially higher risk of the condoms breaking. You will need to use a lot of lube if this is what you want to do.

Consider Safety

As stated before, you must wear condoms when having double penetration. It’s also best to be on the pill and have the guys you are having sex with get tested before hand. If you are with your boyfriend and a sex toy, you probably know that he’s clean. It’s best to use a condom on the toy before you put it inside you just to keep the toy safe. Whether your boyfriend is going to enter your vagina or give you anal, it’s always recommended to use a condom with toys. If you aren’t too sure about having a sex toy in your ass, you can always lube up your boyfriend’s fingers. His fingers are going to be much smaller and can easily fit inside you comfortably.

Little Known Fact

Double penetration is reliant on muscle relaxation. One little known fact is that the muscles in your vagina and anus will be more relaxed after having an orgasm. If you are looking for an easy way to make the experience much more pleasurable on the first try, have your boyfriend finger you or give you oral sex before he gives you double penetration. This can also come in handy if you are going to be with two guys because it will cut down on the risk of the condoms breaking while they are inside you.

As a teen you’re probably wondering about sex and what you can do to stay safe. Curiosity about sex is normal and it’s something that every teen goes through. It must be said that the only form of safe sex is abstinence. Even though this is the only foolproof way to stay safe, there are countermeasures that you can take to keep you and your partner free of STD’s or unwanted pregnancy. Here are a few ways that you can stay safe with your partner.

Use Condoms

Condoms are a necessity with teen sex. Not only condoms prevent pregnancy, it can prevent the transmission of STDs found in the seminal and vaginal fluids. Teens are notorious for misusing condoms or simply “pulling out.” When a condom is used properly, the chance of preventing pregnancy is about 97%. When used with lubrication, the condom is more unlikely to break. Don’t use household items like latex gloves, plastic wrap or balloons. Condoms are specifically made for the shape a penis and designed to stay on. Never use a condom twice.

Have Enough Lubrication

Lubrication is essential to giving the condom as little resistance as possible. If you’re considering having sex, make sure that you have a bottle of lube with you. Lube is relatively inexpensive and will cost about the same as a box of condoms. Don’t be fooled into thinking that lubricated condoms will be enough. Yes, the condoms come lubricated, but they can also get dried out of they have been in a drawer or in a car for as little as a week.

Where Can I Buy Condoms And Lube?

Teens primarily don’t want to go into a store to buy condoms and lube for fear of seeing somebody that they know. If you’re afraid of buying condoms and lube from a store, you can go to a Planned Parenthood or another health clinic and get them for free. These organizations are around to inform teens about sex and prevent unwanted pregnancy. Teen sex is on the rise and every teen has a responsibility to be informed of staying safe.

Consider Getting On The Pill

The pill is a good way to protect against pregnancy, but it does nothing for sexually transmitted diseases. If you are on the pill then you have taken the first step against getting pregnant. Now it’s important to know that you can still contract STI’s and STD’s. Make sure that your partner is wearing a condom every time that the two of you have sex. If you are considering the pill, there are a few things that you should know. The pill can affect different people different ways. It’s important to talk to your physician before you go on the pill Ask them how the pill they are putting you has affected other teens. Try to get on a pill that will keep your skin clear. Several of them will do this.

Are You Ready?

We’ve all read about teen sex, but ask yourself if you’re really ready to do it. If don’t know, ask yourself why you want to. Are you doing it to please a boyfriend? Do you really care about your boyfriend and you’re ready to take it further? Remember that as a teenager you will have hormones racing through your body and lust can easily misconstrued for love. Do not give into pressure from a boyfriend to have sex. This can ruin your first time and the first time should be special.

Make Sure It’s Legal

Teen sex is not something that usually ends up as front-page news, but there are laws against having sex with a minor. If you are under the age of consent in your state and your boyfriend is over the age of consent, you need to look up the legal ramifications for having sex. Your boyfriend could go to jail if you get caught. Remember this before you commit to anything.

It’s Okay To Say No

Saying no doesn’t mean that you’re a tease, it just means that you’re not ready. If you’re being pressured by your boyfriend to have sex and you don’t want to, you should tell him no. A lot of girls get pressured into sex with the fear that if they don’t do it, their boyfriends will leave them. If your boyfriend really cares about you then he will want you to be ready when it happens. If he doesn’t care about then he might break up with you.

Abstinence Is An Excellent Option

Abstinence is a choice that many girls make. This is very respectable and can improve the lives of women who choose to keep their virginity until marriage. Choosing abstinence is way of ensuring that you will complete school with a having a child and get into the work force quickly. This can also be a way to see if your boyfriend really loves you and if he’s willing to wait before the two of you have sex.

Is your penis size important in sex and in giving her powerful orgasms? In other words, is a bigger penis better for sex? That seems to be the proverbial question that men have been asking since the dawn of civilization. Well, what if I told you that your penis size is not a big deal after all? In fact, it is the lousiest among all “tools” you can bring to the bed! Why is that so?

The Truth About Penis Size And Sex

Ask any woman who loves great sex and have experienced great sex. She will tell you that the size of one’s manhood does not feature much in how she enjoys the experience. So put aside that penis extender or male enhancement pills you have been popping all day! A big penis is a great asset to have, but the skills you bring to bed will be your defining moment during sex. Besides pumping in and out, what else can your penis do?

Do Casanovas And Don Juans Have Great Assets In Between Their Thighs?

The secret is out. No they don’t! Even if a guy is small like a mosquito, he can still outperform any clueless lad with a much bigger “asset”! As long as you know how to please, pleasure and caress any woman properly, you can bring great sex to the bedroom, anytime anywhere! And believe me when I say that those Casonovas and Don Juans in the world are only average as far as their penis size goes.

The Myth About Penetration And Orgasm

Penetration is just about the only thing that happens during intercourse. Well, that is just what most guys think. When in the throes of pleasure, most men would focus only on themselves and pump away until they reach the inevitable goal – their own orgasm. But is your woman enjoying a great time too? Well, most probably not! You see, women are incredibly different from guys. Women don’t just live for the moment of orgasm. They relish the way they are brought to a climax.

The simple truth is this: The vast majority of women are not able to reach an orgasm though penetration alone simply because her clitoris – the nerve center of a woman’s orgasm – is not properly stimulated via penetration. So your penis, big or small, does not figure much in triggering those incredible waves of pleasure in her.

So How Do I Give Her An Orgasm?

Simple! Just observe what SHE does when she stimulates herself (a great majority of women can reach a orgasm through masturbation alone!). Mimic the motions, the angles, the intensity she use on herself. Then use them on her!

At one point or another every guy has pulled the old ruler up to himself to see how he measures up. Men are very touchy about their penis size. They think that the size of their Johnson signifies how much of a man they are. Without getting into the psychology of how a small member can affect a man’s life, we’ll just say that it does matter.

The problem is that a lot of guys think they have a small penis when in fact they are right at or above average. If you have caught a glance of another guy in the locker room and felt embarrassed, you need the facts first. Here is the real truth about your penis size.

Average Size When Flaccid

The average penis size when flaccid is about 3.75 inches in length. A flaccid member that measures between 3-4 inches in length when it is not erect is average. It is true that some guys have bigger penises than others. If you feel self-conscious about your genitals when changing in a locker room, remember that you are about average. If you’re not average, move on to the erection measurements. It must be noted that some guys are “growers” not showers. The head and shaft can enlarge by up to three times its length when erect.

Average Size With Erection

Most guys will not fret over being small when it’s flaccid. The biggest aspect of worrying about your penis size comes from being with a woman. When you’re with a woman, you will be erect. The average size of an erect member is about 6-7 inches in length. When you’re measuring your shaft, use a tape measure.

These are easier than using a ruler. Hold the tape measure at the tip of your penis and then bring it down to the base where your shaft meets your scrotum. If you have seen guys in the locker room with a Johnson that hangs 5 inches long, remember that it probably only grows to about 6-7 inches. Very few men actually have 9-11 inch penises.

What About Sex?

The main question that every guy has is whether or not he will be able to satisfy a woman. Unless your shaft is less than 4 inches in length there is no anatomical reason that you will not be able to please a woman in bed. Most guys do not know that the woman’s vagina is only about 3 inches long. This means that even with a 4 inch member, you will be able to reach her g-spot.

The vagina will expand and contract during sex, but only by 1 inch. If you have ever watched a porno with a guy that has a 10-11 incher, you may not have noticed how far he goes in. Most women are not comfortable taking the whole thing inside of her because the vagina is not equipped for that length.

What Can I Do?

There are a lot of enlargement products on the market. Pills, patches and extenders are just some of these. Pills like Viagra, Cialis and Extense are designed to increase blood flow. This has little to do with actual penis size. These pills are designed to make an erection stronger. If you really want to extend the length of your shaft, you should look into penile exercises.

Jelqing is a very popular exercise that “works out” the penis. The shaft is a muscle and it can be made bigger with the proper exercises. This could take months before you see any kind of return so be prepared before you think that it’s a miracle cure. Penis pumps can be used for enlargement, but they can hurt if not used properly. Make sure that you know how to use one before you try it out.

Your size is going to have little to do with how a girl sees you. If you have a very small member, you should talk to your doctor about possible solutions. Penile surgery is not recommended very often as it comes with a lot of risk. If you are an average size, you’ll still be able to give a woman an orgasm.

You will be able to do everything that a guy with an 8 incher can do. Check out some jelqing exercises if you would like to get a little bigger. Some people claim they have gained an inch to an inch and half from jelquing. Penis pumps are another product shown to work, but you must be careful. Talk to your doctor before you decide on anything, as they will be able to give you personalized advice.

You’re Hot

Your guy thinks you’re hot. Period. He wouldn’t be with you if he didn’t find you attractive – period! Men are visual and need visual stimulation to be turned on – it’s against his genetic code for him to be with someone he doesn’t think is physically beautiful or good looking.

You’re probably thinking “Well, that’s because I take care to hide my cellulite” or “We never have sex with the lights on, so he doesn’t have the chance to actually see me.” Forget that crap. He likes you with your cellulite. Fact is, he was probably so mesmerized by your jiggling ass that he didn’t notice the cellulite. See the difference? You may think your jiggly ass is ugly – he thinks it’s jiggly, fun to play with and sexy. So forget your flaws and embrace yourself!

You Should Be More Into It

Even if you’re really into it, he probably still thinks you should be more into it. Enthusiasm is like, 50% of sex, at least. Think about it this way – guys are used to watching porn, where women scream, pant, beg and LOVE sex. Yeah, that’s their job and they’re getting paid pretty damn well to do it – but being into sex with your lover is actually YOUR job.

Make an effort to step up your involvement during sex. Talk dirty, make more noise and whisper his name. Act like the only thing in the world you want to be doing is HIM – and nothing else. Be totally in the moment and he’ll love it! Being in the moment and allowing yourself to become consumed with pleasure is also a great way to enhance sex for you too!

You’re Still Hot

Yes, he really thinks you’re hot. Really, really. Especially during sex. Believe it. But don’t ask your guy – he’ll think it’s a trap and be afraid to answer with anything but “yes.” Of course, the truthful answer IS “yes,” but it will still scare the crap out of him.

You Should Be More Naked

If it hasn’t sunk in that guys are visual when it comes to sex, go watch a porno flick. They’re designed to cater to a man’s need to see things that are sexual – and most films do a pretty good job of that. Unless you’re wearing nothing but your birthday suit, he’s probably thinking that you should be more naked. When you get dressed for work in the morning, it pains him to see you put clothes on, because he’s thinking you should be more naked.

If you’re wearing clothes, he’s thinking about taking them off. If you’re wearing lingerie, he’s still considering taking it off. Get more naked and he won’t complain. Ever.

Can’t Wait For You To Orgasm

Your fella LOVES it when you reach climax. As much as he loves sex and his own orgasm, he loves to see you orgasm even more. (The guys that seemingly only care about their own pleasure lack only one thing – the knowledge of how to give YOU the big O). He loves everything about your orgasm, from the heavy breathing to your eyes rolling back in your head to the sounds you make. He loves it even more when you totally lose control!

He craves seeing that primal side of you, so don’t downplay your orgasm or stay quiet. Feel free to let loose completely and let your body do whatever it’s going to do – moan, thrash, grind and gasp for air. He will drink up every bit of it.

You Should Try New Things

Variety is the spice of sex, but that doesn’t mean that you have to go nuts and start trying really weird stuff. While some guys have some freaky sex fantasies, many men have fantasies that are totally tame. He just wants you to mix it up a little so he doesn’t get bored.

So try getting your freak on and give him an impromptu handjob the next time you are on a date at the movie theater. Whisper something in his ear at dinner that makes him think of sex. Don’t wear panties under your skirt and slide his hand underneath to let him feel your wetness. Use your creativity and imagination and always be doing something different. You want to keep him on his toes!

The common saying “a lady in the streets but a freak in the sheets” is the kind of woman that every man is after. He wants someone with that wholesome exterior so he can take her home to mom and get the seal of approval. However, once mommy is out of the equation, he wants that same woman to be able to turn it on in the bedroom and give him pleasure so good, it should be illegal.

If you are usually the good girl in all dimensions of your relationship, including bedroom play, have you ever thought of kicking things up a notch? Wouldn’t you like to be bad? Every woman likes a bad boy, so doesn’t every woman want to be a bad girl? If you are going to go ahead with reading then you better be prepared to be bad.

During sex and when you are feeling extra naughty, there are five hot sex tricks that will easily send your man over the edge. If you thought you were able to give him an explosive orgasm before, wait until you unleash these tips on him.

1. Scratching

When your man is on top of you in the missionary position, a good girl might lie there and take it, caressing his back occasionally and not doing much else. If a bad girl is getting it in the missionary position, she is going to use her free hands to her advantage. Men like it rough because men are built tough. They can handle a little pain and it usually translates into pleasure. To be bad during hot sex, use those nails and scratch him down his back. The pain will transfer into a tingly sensation down his entire back, sending chills throughout his whole body, making him way harder inside of you.

2. Biting

The same goes for using your teeth in the bedroom. Of course, you don’t want to take things too far and draw blood but a little nibble is always appreciated. Biting on his ear lobe while moaning into it will give him that little boost of pleasure and pain. Biting on his bottom lip after kissing him passionately will give him that same feeling. If you think we can handle it, take things a step further and bite his nipples slightly. A man’s nipples are actually more sensitive than a woman’s so do be careful but still be bad.

3. Light Choking

While you are on top, riding your man in the cowgirl position and after you scratch him with your nails, move your hands up to his neck and choke him a little. Now, be careful with this because you don’t want to take it too far. You only want to give him that little sense of “I am in control” and that he is helpless beneath you. You don’t want to obstruct his breathing so lightly wrap your fingers around his neck and gently squeeze. Even if it is a small sensation for him, he will totally think it’s hot and kinky. Bonus!

4. Work Your Hips

When good girls have sex, they don’t get into that deep grind and really give it to their men. If you are going to hone in on your inner bad girl, then you need to work those hips. While on top, good girls will lightly bounce up and down, putting on a show more than feeling pleasure. Good girls will do what they think benefits their man more. Bad girls are the opposite. Bad girls are going to do everything they can to make sure THEY have an orgasm. When you are on top, learn to move your hips in a different motion. Get on top of him and grind on him in deep, sensual circles. You will know it is working and that you are taking your sex level to a whole new level by the look on his face.

5. Expose Yourself

Good girls tend to hide themselves in the bedroom but bad girls are so carefree and they want to be seen. Have hot sex with the lights on or in a nicely lit room. Let your man see all of you and that means ALL of you. Let him take you from behind, spread your cheeks and see everything. Men are visual and they need to have that stimulation. If you give it to him in this sense, you will be surprised to see just how fast he ejaculates. Seeing what is going on makes all the difference to him. Put your shyness away because you are a bad girl now.

Now, get on with your bad self and show your man a whole new side of you tonight. That is, if you dare.