Who’s Responsible for Contraception - the Man or the Woman?

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many men will leave it completely up to the woman to “stop” the progression of sexual activity in order to demand the use of a condom, instead of simply putting the condom on himself without needing to be told to do so by his partner. This behavior unfairly shifts the responsibility of condom use fully onto the woman, and implies that without her demand, he would happily have sex without using a condom at all.

Why are women stereotypically placed in the sexually “responsible“ role? Aren’t men just as concerned about their own health as women? Then shouldn’t men be equally as likely to “stop” the sexual activity in order to use protection?

The usual justification for this scenario is that men get “carried away” in the heat of the moment and “forget” about the consequences of their sexual behaviors, whereas women do not get swept away by their sexual passions and are therefore the ones who must be “responsible” for them both. This argument is based upon too many incorrect culturally-bound assumptions regarding female sexuality to explore in this article. Suffice to say that women are equally as “impassioned” as men, and should not be the only ones who decide whether or not contraception will be used. The “heat of the moment” is not an excuse for irresponsible sexual behavior for either women or men.

Do Have a Verbal and Explicit Conversation About Contraception

Having a conversation about contraception does not have to be as uncomfortable as most people believe. The key is to broach the subject during a non-sexual, calm moment together. One of the worst times to have this “talk” is right before sex because it will certainly kill the mood. It’ll be much better, and lead to a much smoother first time, if this issue is already taken care of and both partners are comfortable knowing that they’ve made a healthy, loving, and respectful decision together.

Featured Author, Rose Rivera has a Masters degree in Family and Sexuality Studies and is the founder of SpeakSexy.org, a website dedicated to keeping readers abreast of the latest sexuality trends in an intelligent, provocative, and erotic way. For more great sex tips be sure to sign up to Speak Sexy’s feed today!

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