Why Men Don’t Say ‘I Love You’…

Your guy may change your tires, buy you presents and open the door for you at a restaurant, but he has not yet uttered those three words.

Does that mean he doesn’t love you?

Without hearing the utterance, you may wonder what’s going on in his skull. Is he just sticking around for the sex? Has he developed an intricate plan to win you over and then tear your heart out, just for the fun of it? 

Men are hard to read. They are not as verbal as women, and some have been raised on the belief that "actions speak louder than words. "Chalk it up to genetics, culture (nature versus nurture) … it doesn’t matter. You just want to know if you’re a man’s final destination, not just a rest stop along the highway.

Fortunately, knowledge of your guy’s zodiac sign can help you determine if he’s the strong, silent type … or if he’s just taking you for a ride. The twelve Sun signs symbolize different ways that people express themselves. Some men are primarily emotional, others live in their heads. Look to your guy’s Sun sign below to learn how likely he is to say, "I love you."

Air Signs: Gemini, Libra and Aquarius 

These mental, sociable signs vary greatly in their expressions of love. Gemini may say, "I love you" Wednesday, only to have changed his mind on Friday. He is a fickle man, and it is hard to hold his interest for long. Libra, on the other hand, is the romantic type, and will not only express his affection with "I love you," but also with songs, flowers, chocolates and reservations at fine restaurants. Aquarius will say "I love you … like I love all my friends!"

Earth Signs: Taurus, Virgo and Capricorn 

More than any other element, earth signs will express their love with actions more than words. After all, the earth element is all about what you can actually hold in your hands. Taurus will express affection by doing simple things for you, probably tasks that involve physical labor. Status-conscious Capricorn will buy you diamonds. Virgo is the exception — he does thrive on being helpful, but his sign is ruled by communication planet Mercury. He’s likely to put his love into words, but he’ll also alert you to the spinach lodged between your teeth.

Fire Signs: Aries, Leo and Sagittarius 

These inspiring guys prefer drama, action and adventure over articulate expressions of their love. Leo (the exception) is most likely to exclaim his affection, preferably with Shakespearian prose in front of a crowded room. Sagittarius will take you along the entire Appalachian Trail, but may fear that "I love you" means having to stay home and watch network TV. Aries will say those three words only if he had to conquer another guy (or your own resistance) to get to you.

Water Signs: Cancer, Scorpio and Pisces

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  • k
    What about a scorpio man in his mid twenties...? there is a scorpio man who has liked me for a very long time ( few yrs already) and we have nv been together yet but he tells me things like i miss you and i miss your kisses and i miss holding you.

    Is that a typical scorpio man's way of expressing his emotions/love or that he's only interested in the physical? please tell me what you think , thanks.

    btw, i'm a leo girl. are we compatible..? it's not so easy to figure this guy's emotion's out.
  • veronica
    well im a cancerian girl ..TOTALLY In distress and IN LOVE wid my piscean 'bf'....well i write dis in quotes coz we have broken up...still talk n get excited wen we do...behavin d same way wen we were together...but still think abt each other....he says sorry to me bt doesnt specify nethin after dat..says he misses me terribly and eveyrthin else related to me...but then he doesnt say he wants me bck..or loves me..or watever..coz HE was d one to slip outta d noose wen i confessed dat i still loved him..he totally wandered off..leavin me shocked..dnt understand wat d hell is going on?/can neone tell me plzz...coz he suddenly mails me...says he wants to talk to me..blah n blah

    WHAT DO I MAKE OUT OF IT??
    wats he thinking??
  • hmmm . . . does this mean a romantic relationship with an Aquarius reduces to friendship with benefits?

    I was hoping the Aquarian water-bearer really did carry water, rather than air--

    as long as it's not hot (the air, that is)

    apparently they're good for me, as my Saturn in Aquarius rules my 7th house

    but I haven't yet so much as run into one, anywhere, of the male variety, and the females are odd, they are aggressive towards me and put up a friendy face but they think I'm out to get them

    I'm still trying to figure this out, it's a blind spot in my chart, this Saturn, bucket holder of the astral wheel, off on its own near my Midheaven, and wreaking considerable havoc on a regular basis
  • katelynn
    That seems so right about Pisces, Jeffrey. I am always finding that I can only express myself through poetry and music. So much that I have had an ex comment saying life doesn't play out like a song. I still disagree with that.

    I do wish there was more information on Aquarius, as it doesn't seem to fit the bill with mine.
  • For Pisces, words cannot contain the emotions this sign feels, unless they're expressed poetically or in song.
  • I'm Pisces and I often got caught in definition of "I Love You"... Hence, trying to avoid this phrase altogether and defining it with completely different words.

    Though, when you catch yourself doing that or simply realize it that you're really dodging the definition and not the love itself, it becomes a lot easier to express ;-)
  • Hey Colette,

    Welcome, and thank you!

    Enjoy taming your lion. :-)

    Have an awesome day!
    Dan & Jennifer
  • I'm very lucky to have a Leo. He tells me that he loves me every day. However, Leos are tough because they love to overindulge. I've spent a good amount of time trying to tame my lion ;-)

    Great blog!
  • Jenny, what's your husband's Sun sign?
  • Fortunately that's not the case with my husband. He says I love you all the time.
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