4 Ways Nerves Can Wreck A First Date

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First dates can be excruciating to your nerves.  You want to make a good impression – no, a great impression, so that this person will see everything that is fabulous about you and call you the next day for a second date.

This could be “the one” after all, and too many times our nerves get to us and cause us to do some, well, less than attractive things. 

I’ve listed the top 4, in no particular order, and some solutions that can help you overcome the nerves and just be you… calm & confident.

Nervous Habit #1: Eating. 

Believe it or not, this is one of the most common signs of nervousness.  Picture it: you’re sitting there with a fantastic person across from you… it gets quiet for a moment… nothing brilliant comes to mind to break the silence with, so you reach for a roll and comment on the restaurant’s atmosphere.

Reaching for a roll isn’t the problem… but if you’re not careful, you’ll find that your mouth is constantly full of food.

Just take a deep breath, and be okay with silence.  Look at what’s on the table in front of you and make a quick decision to eat only what is appropriate.  Then pace yourself.  The key is to not allow yourself to get so uncomfortable that you reach out for food.

Some people tend to eat because they are uncomfortable with attention, and they focus on the food in an attempt to draw attention away from themselves.  In this case, just relax and enjoy the attention.  If it’s creepy, just end the date earlier than normal and you won’t have to see that person again.  There’s no sense going home with a disappointing date AND a few extra pounds of food!

Nervous Habit #2: Talking -  or NOT talking.

This is perhaps the most damaging sign of nervousness, because it can really affect the way a new person thinks about your personality.

If you are someone who seems to go quiet and blank when you are nervous, then you might want to rehearse your date.  You might feel silly doing it, but if you visualize over and over again asking specific and interesting questions, or bringing up unique conversations that fit your personality and interests, it won’t be very difficult at all to get those conversations started.  And soon enough, you’ll be comfortable with this person and will not have to visualize the conversations in advance.

If you’re someone who seems to talk fast and incessantly when you’re nervous, you’re going to have to also do some prep work.  Wear a piece of jewelry that will remind you to listen to yourself speak.  Anything that is slightly intrusive on your awareness level will work great.

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