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8 Signs Your Date is Married

Dating Tips & Advice - 8 Signs Your Date is Married

Ever wondered if you’re dating a married man or woman?

Maybe it’s the fact that you know nothing about their personal life or you’ve never met their friends.

Something just doesn’t jive when you’re together.

Luckily, there are some telltale signs that your lover has another!

Below are eight easy-to-spot signs that your date is probably married… 

1. What’s Your Home Number?

Getting a hold of your partner is about as easy as contacting a government employee at 4:35 pm. You have a cellular number but it always seems to be turned off or out of range when you aren’t together.

Well, you can’t expect them to take your call at their son’s soccer game, can you?

2. Are You Dating A Homeless Person?

If you didn’t know better you’d think your lover lived on the street.

You know he must have a house — he has to store that extensive wardrobe somewhere — but, much like the Sasquatch, you’ve never actually seen it.

The reason all the sleepovers happen at your house? His wife would be an inconvenience at his.

3. Tell Me About Your Family…

Speaking of mysterious, how much do you know about her personal life?

Does she ever talk about her family, where she went to school, her hometown or hobbies?

If she’s keeping you in the dark, it’s because she doesn’t want to give you the information you need to discover she’s married.

4. I’d Never Find This On My Own

And that’s exactly the point. All of your public dates take place in very inconspicuous out-of-the-way places, but those happening in the privacy of your living room likely outweigh them.

If you find yourself watching movies at your place more often than eating dinner in a restaurant, you may be getting it on with a married man.

5. What A Strange Time To Call

Consistently calling at odd hours is a definite sign of something amiss.

She may call early in the morning on the way to work or in the wee hours of the night while walking the dog, but it never seems to be at a normal time or from a normal location. Also watch for lot of (untraceable) calls from public phone booths or leaving the room to take calls on his mobile when you are together.

6. Come On, Let Me See Them

Most people keep photos of their wife and kids close to their heart. If you spy some snaps in his wallet or her purse but they won’t let you have a look, it’s a safe bet they’re not of a best bud or beloved pet.

7. PDAs Are MIA

She always finds a way to wiggle her hand from yours when you walk down the street. She nervously looks around her before offering you a peck on the lips and hugs are quick and perfunctory.

If public displays of affection are rarer than black pearls, she’s probably worried about hubby seeing her locked onto your lips.

8. Why Don’t We Do Anything With Your Friends?

The two of you always go out alone.

There’s never another couple or friends along for the ride. He says his friends are all boring or they’re married and can’t go out.

The reality is that he’s all married and just trying to keep worlds from colliding and crashing into his elaborate lie!

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Comments

2 Responses to “8 Signs Your Date is Married”

  1. Jeff Kee on January 22nd, 2008 3:03 am

    Wow it’s been a while since I cam ehere..

    This article was actually very funny to me! :)

    Of course “He/She wears a wedding ring” is not on the list.. only if it were that easy.

  2. Ronnie on February 9th, 2008 8:53 am

    “Something just doesn’t jive when you’re together.”

    I don’t like to be a spelling and grammar nitpicker, but this is one of my all time pet peeves, and is a very common mistake. The word you’re looking for is “jibe”, not “jive”, unless you want to be on “Dancing with the Stars”, LOL or singing a duet of “Jive Talkin’” with the Bee Gees!!!

    The word “jibe” when used as a verb can mean “be compatible, similar or consistent; coincide in their characteristics”. “Jive” as a noun means a form of “hipster” talk or a type of dance. Jive as a verb means to tease, cajole or play around.

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