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My Boyfriend Wants To Have Sex Before Marriage But I’m Not Sure. Is It Really Okay? (Video)

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Is having sex before marriage wrong?

That’s not a question that anyone can answer but you.  You need to take into consideration everything about the situation before you make the decision to have sex before marriage. 

What are your religious or spiritual beliefs?  What are your moral beliefs?  How comfortable are you with the person you want to have sex with?  Do you trust this person?  How comfortable would you be with the consequences of sex should they arise. For example, pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases? 

These questions should be answered, but not by your friends, family or anyone else.  You need to sit down and really think about what having sex before marriage means to you. 

Does it make you feel wrong?  If it does, don’t do it!  If you really feel that it’s not a big deal, that’s okay too.  Ultimately, it’s all about what you want and how comfortable you are with the idea.

What if I do?

Well, first things first. Use protection. 

Sex is enjoyable, but you can get pregnant and you can contract sexually transmitted diseases.  Guard against possible consequences by using sensible protection and by being smart and safe. 

If you have any questions about safe sex, pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases, a great person to ask would be your doctor.  They’ll give you unbiased information and can educate you on how to safely have sex while still enjoying your partner.

Remember, sex is something to be enjoyed between two consenting adults.  You should never feel pressured into having sex or feel like you “have to.” 

If you want to have sex before marriage, that’s fine.  If you don’t, that’s fine too. 

Don’t let anyone else tell you what you should do or persuade you into doing something you don’t want to do.  It’s not up to your friends, family, relatives, church officials, neighbors or anyone else!  Trust your gut instinct and go with what you feel is right.

With that said, you basically want to just be sure you’re ready to take the step forward and have sex before marriage.  If you don’t feel that its right, by all means trust your gut instinct and stay abstinent, at least for now.  If you’re perfectly comfortable having sex before marriage and comfortable with the person you’d like to have sex with, go for it.  It’s your decision. 

Don’t rush it though – take your time thinking about the situation and taking a look at how you might feel after the fact.  You don’t have to now, but you might want to later.  That’s fine too.  Remember, you call the shots.  What you say goes!

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About the author: Dan and Jennifer are the Founders and Senior Editors of AskDanAndJennifer.com, which has been called "the best and most popular dating, love, and sex advice column on the Internet today". Their videos are some of the most popular videos on YouTube. Don't forget to ask your dating, love, and sex questions in the Ask Dan and Jennifer - Love, & Sex Forums.

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