Getting stuck in the friend zone is no fun, especially if you really want more than just a friendship with someone. But are you really looking for a serious relationship, or is it a case of like attracting like? Here’s how to find out if you’re ready for a relationship or you really are getting stuck in the friend zone!

Question: This is my first question to you guys, and i just got wind saying that you guys know your stuff when it comes to relationships. I got out of a 5 year relationship with my fiance, and its been 3 months. I’m talking to women, and it seems like all women want now is casual sex, no commitment. I feel like I keep getting stuck in the “friend zone” and that’s all women look at me as. Any advice?

–YouTube Viewer

Are You Really Ready For Committment?

It’s a common belief that “like attracts like” and those looking for serious relationships will actually be attracted to each other. If you’ve just gotten out of a long, committed relationship, you may subconciously just be looking for friendships right now and not know it. If you’re only attracting women who simply want to be friends and have casual sex with no strings attached, take a moment to think about if that’s really what you want too. It’s okay if you’re not ready for a serious relationship and having fun with friends is a great way to get yourself back in the dating game. Sit down and really consider what you want at this time. Are you really looking for another committed relationship or are you attracting the kind of people you subconciously want to date right now?

Don’t Rush It

There’s no rush when it comes to dating after ending a serious relationship with someone. Even if you were the one who ended the relationship, the body, mind and soul still needs to grieve for the loss and take time to adjust to a new lifestyle. Things are very different for you now, and it’s important to give yourself time to absorb it. That doesn’t mean isolate yourself, but you may want to be careful about jumping right into another committed relationship. Give yourself time to think about the relationship, but also allow yourself to think about what you want now before you take the next step.

Attracting The Kind Of Partner You Want

When you’re really ready for a committed relationship, trust that you’ll start attracting people who feel the same way you do and are also looking for a committed relationship. Focus more on having fun now, and let whatever happens happen. Time has a funny way of healing old wounds and paving the way for new and better things in your life if you let it. Constantly trying to attract a partner who wants a serious relationship when you don’t – even subconciously – will only put more stress on you and make you feel like you’re not “dateable” material. Don’t worry about it! Just have fun and build new friendships and nurture old ones. Take this opportunity to make your life what you want it to be right now and in time, the right person will come.