Simply be creative and go with it. While this trigger can be used anywhere, it tends to get the best results in clubs and bars where women are already in a “pick up” environment. For example I wouldn’t use this technique on a woman you’ve just met at the supermarket.

“Who Would You ‘Do?’”

Step 1: Pick two guys that have very average looks (guys that a woman would never choose based only on physical looks), or find men who have really low self-esteem and poor body language.

Step 2: Tell the woman you’re playing a game and point out the two men.

Step 3: Say, “If you had to choose, which of those two guys would you have sex with?”

NOTE: A common response is “Can I say none?” Of course you say no, and ask again which would be her choice if she had to choose. It’s just the rules of the game.

Most men don’t understand why you would try and play match-maker with a woman you’re interested in and another man, because they don’t realize two very important things.

1. You are proving you really don’t need her, projecting your independence as a masculine man.
2. You’re having fun. All people want to have fun so make sure the woman associates fun with you. Tease, flirt and accuse all you want. You can do what you want, you’re a masculine man remember?

Predict Her Future

Ask for her hand and tell her something silly about her future. Say, “Do you want to know your future?” If she agrees, grab her hand and in a disappointing voice tell her that she’ll be one of those construction workers that hold a “stop/slow” sign 8 hours a day for the rest of her life.”

Alternatively, you can ask for her hand and then say, “Oh… no!” and give her hand back. After her curiosity has been stirred up, say things like, “I don’t think I can be seen with you anymore” then reveal her future if you want.

Pickup Lines Game

Step 1: Tell her how pathetic pick up lines are.

Women always agree with this statement and you quickly build trust.

Step 2: Start an exciting conversation about lame guys that have approached her.

From here you can ask the woman the worst pickup lines that have been used on her or her friends. This will transition into many funny, flirty and emotional conversations.

• Talk about guys that have said funny lines
• Strange stories that she can remember
• Weird and pathetic guys that have approached her
• Funny things guys have said

Create A Simple Environment

Your first date with a woman should be in a quiet place where you can communicate one on one. This is the time to prove that you’re a catch. You need to project this by successfully flirting with her.

DON’T FORGET: Just because the woman has committed to a first date doesn’t mean she’ll become your girlfriend. Some guys “go weird” once women decide to have a first date. Realize that there’s a big different between getting a first date and a second date. You need to leave a darn good impression. The best dates for first dates are:

•  Coffee shops
• Bars / Lounges

Your first date is not a job interview. You don’t need to know all the demographics about your date, and she doesn’t need to know all that stuff about you either. Save that stuff for when she really likes you. When she bugs and begs you to answer this type of question, you’ll know she’s interested.

There are many interesting areas of conversation you should focus on; likewise there are also some topics you should never talk about during early dates.

Good Topics To Use

The best way to make a woman feel comfortable and close is to get her to share experiences and information about herself. Ask about her passions, dream-life, and what she wanted to be when she was a little girl. Talk about current TV shows, Hollywood gossip, and anything in the entertainment industry. Don’t forget to throw in some playful teasing behavior during the dates to keep the interaction interesting.

REMEMBER: If you get too caught up in facts you’ll certainly come across as boring. You’re in complete control over what you talk about, so make it interesting. If you do talk about factual stuff, spice it up with things like, “You’re such a dork,” “I’m watching you missy,” or “You know I have eyes in the back of my head. I can see everything.”

Deadly Topics

Politics, propaganda, religion and negative experiences such as deaths, ex-partners or the state of the world are all topics you want to stay away from. People associate the time they’ve had with someone to the feelings they experienced during their time together. If you’ve spoken excessively about topics that have no hope of being humorous, you’re in trouble.

If you find yourself moving into one of these directions just say, “Let’s talk about (insert new topic),” then quickly interject, using one of the topics above to save yourself from a depressing date\. Don’t say, “Can we please change the subject,” just go ahead and talk about something more fun. You’re the leader, so make sure you guide the conversation in a positive direction.

But before you start considering a serious relationship with that stunner you met last night at the club—or God forbid, marrying one of these women—I want to tell you that many of the negative cliches about strippers are true. While this may sound harsh and certainly not all exotic dancers fall into these stereotypes, you have to accept that when dating a stripper that more often than not the reality behind the fantasy is often more trouble than it’s worth. Again, I’m not saying that all strippers are this way, but if you hang out in this scene for a while, as I have, you’re going to notice similarities among many of them.

What Your Relationship Will Entail

Your relationship with a stripper will probably involve a lot of drama, dishonesty and a complete disregard for sobriety. You’ll have to contend with all the other guys (including her regular customers) who want to fuck your girlfriend and want to get you out of the picture. But then there’s the nights of wild partying, the incredible sex, and the awesome ego boost you get from having sex with a stripper!

This is their lifestyle. No matter what they might say, stripping is more than a job: it’s a lifestyle. These chicks are working all night long, six or seven nights a week, and drinking and possibly using drugs whenever they work. Nearly all strippers at least drink booze on a nightly basis, since it helps them loosen up, shed their inhibitions, and “bond” with customers. (No customer likes it when his stripper orders a $7 orange juice—he wants to think he’s getting her buzzed and making her more vulnerable to his “charms.”)

With this grueling nightly routine, there’s little time for these chicks to get anything else done. They wake up in the afternoon and start getting ready to report back to the club. After a while, the thought of waking up at 8am and going to a “regular” job—and making a regular, taxed income—becomes totally unrealistic. Fundamentally, these women are lazy. If you’re an educated, career-minded guy, it will be impossible for you to relate to their daily routine and how little they get accomplished. And you’re kidding yourself if you think you’re going to start dating a hardcore pro and turn her into a productive member of society.

What Happens If You Want Her To Quit Dancing

If you start dating her and have her quit working, she’ll probably wake up in the afternoon and lounge around your house in her sweats. Or, maybe she’ll roll out with your credit card to do some shopping. But don’t think for a minute that she’s going to update her resume and use this opportunity to go after her dream job.

Many Strippers Will Lie

Just in order to be a stripper and mentally accept what they’re doing for a living, they have to lie to themselves. They tell themselves, “I’m only doing this for a limited amount of time—until I pay off my debts/straighten out my life/settle down with the right guy/etc.” They’ll constantly repeat this lie to their friends and family (or, lie about what they do for a living altogether).

If they’ve managed to con themselves, conning you is hardly going to be a stretch. Strippers who’ve been in “the game” for a while seem to develop an allergy to telling the truth. If you try to date a stripper, get ready to deal with a level of flakiness you’ve never encountered before. Phone calls will go unreturned for days. She’ll break appointments with you at the last minute, for ridiculous reasons. She’ll need to borrow money, even though you know she’s hauling down a ton of cash at the club. She’ll make up lies to cover her mistakes and inconsistent behavior, even though just telling you the truth would make things so much easier.

Many Of Them Are Single Mothers

You’ll also find that a lot of strippers, despite their seemingly flawless bodies, are single moms. The fathers of these kids are long gone (or serving prison sentences). Again, this is a result of being with some idiot ex-boyfriend, who got her pregnant and then split. I once had a relationship with a dancer who had a five-year-old daughter. Personally, if I’m dating a stripper, my rule is that I don’t even want to meet her kid. I’m sure her daughter was cute and sweet and wonderful, but I didn’t want to get involved—and I sure as hell wasn’t going to get on the hook financially.

I did this for the child’s sake, really. I figure the kid has enough issues to deal with, having a stripper for a mom and no father, without me coming into her life, forming a bond with her and acting like her surrogate father, and then bailing (just like her father did). I suppose if you get into a serious relationship with a stripper, you’re going to have to get involved with the child and be a father figure. You might actually find joy in that. I’ve known relationships like this that worked out. Personally, I’m not interested in marrying a stripper, and I know that each relationship is going to eventually fall apart. Therefore, I keep the kids out of the picture.

What To Do To Make It Work

If you do wind up getting into a relationship with a dancer, you’ve also got to be prepared to deal with how she makes her living. Jealousy often becomes a destructive factor. Only two types of men have no problem whatsoever being a stripper’s boyfriend. The first type of guy is confident enough in himself, and in the relationship, to know that her job is exactly that—a JOB. Usually, this type of guy has hung around enough strip clubs, and known enough dancers, to understand that it’s work to them and that the “flirting” with customers is an act.

(With my ex, when she went to work, we’d joke about her “going to the ATM machine.” She’d go to the club, milk the suckers for $1,000, then we’d meet up at a bar afterwards and have a great time.)

This type of guy also keeps his girlfriend’s lifestyle in check. He doesn’t accept her irresponsible flakiness. And she doesn’t work every night and sleep all day, because they both want to spend time together as a couple.

(For every 10 strippers that lead reckless fast-lane lifestyles, you’ll find one or two that actually have their heads straightened out and really are just working at the strip club on their way to other things.)

The second type of guy is letting his dancer girlfriend pay the bills. She brings home the bacon, so he’s in no position to complain about her job. He doesn’t want to lose his meal ticket. (Otherwise, how would be able to afford high-quality marijuana and equipment for his rock band?)

If you do wind up dating a dancer, always be in the first category!

Some Other Things To Keep In Mind

Another rule of dating dancers is that you shouldn’t hang around her club while she’s working. This can only create problems. She’s going to feel uncomfortable if you’re watching her flirt with other customers, which will hinder her ability to make money. No matter how cool you are with her, and what she does for a living, steer clear of the club while she’s working. Respect it as her work space.

Setting some ground rules can help, such as asking her to come home directly after her shift and holding her to it. In Las Vegas, however, the strip clubs stay open 24 hours. Her shift might technically end at 1am, but if she’s with a customer who’s shelling out for dance after dance, she’s going to stay with him until he’s ready to leave (or until his money runs out, whichever comes first). It’s part of dancer protocol: as long as the customer is spending money, it’s inappropriate for them to “clock out” and tell the customer they’re going home.

If this becomes a serious problem for you, just end the relationship and move on the next.

Teasing women about their beauty is the most powerful way to lower their initial defenses and attract them. You’ve only got two minutes to impress a woman and make yourself stand out as somebody unique.

Understand that these beautiful women only want men with high standards.

How To Use This Strange Teasing Method To Your Advantage

OBJECTIVE: To show the woman you’re not easily impressed by “physical beauty” like other guys. You have higher standards.

By teasing the woman you’re making her compete in order to try to meet your standards. Teasing tells the woman she’s failing to reach your high standards and needs to work harder. Understand that these comments work best on “super hot” (over-confident) women.

Naturally, these are the women most guys are attracted to. If a woman is “cute,” but not “super attractive,” tone down your comments and engage her in competitive conversation instead. The more over-confident the woman is, the more you can tease her.

WARNING: Once you’ve used a teasing comment and it’s worked well, she’s going to try and regain her power. She’ll do everything possible to test you, so make sure you don’t give in to her.

Things To Say

• Nice hair. What made you go with a 60’s style?
• Ha. That walk is hilarious. Do it again!
• You like cappuccino’s? (weird look) Na, that’s cool.

Imply she’s short, has no fashion sense, has a funny quirk, etc. Once you find something that gets a great reaction, keep using it. Tease her about her:

• Hair
• Clothes
• Shoes
• Accessories
• Walk
• Mannerisms
• Dorkiness

The “Where Did You Go?” Flirting Technique

Here’s a great example you can do with just about any woman. After talking for some time you can walk up to her and look over her head as if you’re looking for something. You can then say, “Where did you go?”

Don’t stand too close just close enough to get the point across. You’ll usually get a playful hit for this one because it implies that she’s short. If you’re the same height or just a little bit shorter, stand on your toes to add some extra height. Being the same height can actually make this technique work better because it’s sarcastic humor. You’re saying she’s short even though she’s clearly level with your height.

Woman’s Teasing Interpretation

SHE THINKS FIRST: “I’m short and he is laughing about it.”

SHE INTERPRETS THIS AS: He doesn’t only want me for my looks! He’s different than most guys. I want to get to the bottom of this and see what he’s really like! Is he faking?

RESULT: She’s interested.

Re-active Teasing

While this form of teasing is slightly more difficult, it usually more effective because of its “natural conversation” feel. So here’s what you do:

Ask the woman something about her day, what have you been up to? Where do you work? Where have you been shopping? What’s in the shopping bag? Where’d you get that necklace? Anything!

The idea of teasing is that you want to DISAGREE on something with the woman. Thus, creating sexual tension.

DISAGREE on her looks

Say her clothes aren’t cool.

DISAGREE on her opinion of something.

Side note: A great way to tease women at pick-up bars is to joke to your buddy that the woman is too drunk, even if she’s not. Or, accuse her of becoming as insecure as a man who goes around trying to get lucky with his “confidence-in-a-can,” and tell her it’s not going to work with you.

In conclusion, there’s a difference between a woman being seriously upset, and just playing around and being “fake upset.” When they playfully hit you and have a half smile on their face, they like it, no matter what they say!

FACT: Women mean what they do, not what they say.

When she starts laughing, acting natural, fun, and genuinely smiling, then you know you’ve spoken long enough. You no longer need to speak to the woman.

The fastest way to build relationships with people is to share personal information about yourself. When you talk to a woman and discover things or experiences you have in common, you are building a rapport with her. The longer you talk to someone and discuss a wide variety of topics, the more rapport you build.

Rapport allows you to nurture and grow your relationships with friends, family and anyone you come in contact with.

The Most Common Mistake

The most common mistake is trying to become friends first, and then trying to build a sexual relationship later on. Here’s the simplest way to remember how to interact in any given situation.

1. Flirt till she’s attracted to you.
2. Then, while maintaining the flirting, begin to reveal personal information about yourself.

It’s the information about yourself that helps build relationships – your name, job, dreams, hobbies, interests and memories — but it’s the emotions you evoke through your personality that sparks attraction — your confidence, security, sense of humor, leadership, mystery and playfulness.

Don’t Build Report Without Being Flirtatious

Never try and build rapport without first being flirtatious, fun and playful. Not ever. Without showing yourself to be desirable, she has no reason to be interested in you. Nothing has set off the attraction.

Talking about hobbies, life ambitions, careers and education can be fascinating conversation and can work if you can discuss these things in a flirtatious manner. But most men who start on the boring demographic questions find it difficult to transition into a flirtatious mood later.

Most men have the urge to get into these boring questions first, and try to be playful and flirtatious later.  They only attempt to make her sexually aroused after they have established a friendship. This is a death trap that’s going to kill you slowly and painfully as you wait, and never see results.

Move On To Other Women

If you want to attract a woman you’re already friends with and there’s been no sexual chemistry, then you need to move on and start dating other women. You’ve been put into the friend zone and there’s no coming back

If this woman is everything you’ve dreamed about, then you need to date other women and gain valuable dating experience so you’ll actually have a chance with her. If you love her because she’s “the perfect woman”, then chances are that a lot of other men feel the same way about her, which means heavy competition. She has many options and she’s only going to date the very best guy – and that will be hard to compete with.

After you’ve dated several women, you’ll notice your dream girl become curious about your new found desirability, and you may get a second chance. And then again, after going out on a first date with other women, you may realize you like a new woman much more than the one you had your sights on before.

1. Flirting Lines

• Nice hair. What made you go with a 60’s style?
• Ha. That walk is hilarious. Do it again!
• You like cappuccino’s? (weird look) Na, that’s cool.

Imply she’s short, has no fashion sense, has a funny quirk, etc. Once you find something that gets a great reaction, keep using it and maintain your eye contact.

2. Tease Her About Her

• Hair
• Clothes
• Shoes
• Accessories
• Walk
• Mannerisms
• Dorkiness

3. Where Did You Go?

Here’s a great example you can us when flirting with just about any woman. After talking for some time you can walk up to her and look over her head as if you’re looking for something. You can then say, “Where did you go?”

Don’t stand too close just close enough to get the point across. You’ll usually get a playful hit for this one because it implies that she’s short.

If you’re the same height or just a little bit shorter, stand on your toes to add some extra height. Being the same height can actually make this technique work better because it’s sarcastic humor. You’re saying she’s short even though she’s clearly level with your height.

4. Woman’s Flirting Interpretation

HE JUST SAID: “I’m short and he is laughing about it.”
SHE INTERPRETS THIS AS: He doesn’t only want me for my looks! He’s different than most guys. I want to get to the bottom of this and see what he’s really like? Is he faking?
RESULT: She’s interested.

5. Reactive Flirting

While this form of flirting is slightly more difficult, it usually more effective because of its “natural conversation” feel. This will require more confidence. So here’s what you do:

Ask the woman something about her day, what have you been up to? Where do you work? Where have you been shopping? What’s in the shopping bag? Where’d you get that necklace? Anything!

The idea of teasing is that you want to DISAGREE on something with the woman. Thus, creating sexual tension.

DISAGREE on her looks
Say her clothes aren’t cool.
DISAGREE on her opinion of something.

Side note: One of the best ways to incorporate flirting is to joke to your buddy that the woman is too drunk, even if she’s not. Or, accuse her of becoming as insecure as a man who goes around trying to get lucky with his “confidence-in-a-can”, and tell her it’s not going to work with you.

In conclusion, there’s a difference between a girl being seriously upset, and just playing around and being “fake upset.” When they playfully hit you and have a half smile on their face, they like it, no matter what they say!

FACT: Women mean what they do, not what they say. Know this when you are out trying to meet singles.

When she starts laughing, acting natural, fun,  genuinely smiling, and giving you the right body language then you know you’ve spoken long enough.

The Big Mistake

While starting conversations with ladies seems hard enough, it appears even more daunting to keep a interesting, fun conversation going.

When men hang around with their friends they laugh, make jokes, have fun and don’t take things too seriously. But for some reason, when a man finds himself interested in a beautiful woman, he usually becomes very reserved without any confidence.

He stops laughing. He stops making jokes. He stops teasing. He stops having fun. He stops flirting.

Keep The Friendly Vibe

When in the presence of a potential date, instead of keeping up the friendly vibe he has with his friends, he suddenly becomes boring. He won’t make jokes or laugh with the woman, he won’t play around like he does with his friends, and he takes things way too seriously.

Why do men change their behavior around girls? They usually don’t’ even realizing they are doing it. The reason is that men are so afraid of losing their only chance with a particular woman that they  turn into “Mr. Serious,” but don’t even maintain eye contact.

Men get so nervous talking to beautiful women that they lose all creativity and can’t make interesting conversation. Fearful that they might say something rude or challenging, they resort to boring “walking on egg shells” conversations, which results in no emotion.

What Are You Afraid Of?

While men can tell you that it’s important to not be boring when interacting with women, they often don’t even realize when they’re doing it. Remember this simple law.

1. When you fear loosing a woman you become cautious
2. When you’re cautious you become serious
3. When you’re serious you become boring
4. When you’re boring women aren’t attracted
5. When women aren’t attracted you don’t get a date

Men have such a strong “I must have this girl” attitude that the more they desire a woman, the more serious and boring they become in their poor attempts to date them.

Although films and television strongly encourage the idea of begging women, it doesn’t work. These values are used to evoke emotions for the movie audience, and in people take it to heart and buy into the idea that this behavior will lead to success and a first kiss.

Don’t Live In The Movies

It always seems like Mr. Romantic is doing the right thing by standing outside a balcony window every night singing love songs, reading poetry and bringing flowers until his dream girl finally falls in love with him.

While these actions may seem romantic and work in movies, we don’t live in the movies; we live in the real world. Women can smell manipulative men ten miles away and have no respect for their child-like behavior.

Remember acting playful and silly around your brothers and sisters when you were growing up? Whether you were older or younger usually determined who was in control of the playing. If you were older, you’ll probably remember calling your siblings harmless names, hiding their toys and making them beg for them back.

But unfortunately as men grow into adults they forget their playful instincts and try to “make logical sense of everything.” Before reading this book you may have heard of the term “flirting”, but never really understood what it was or why it is necessary to attract women. As you learn the flirting techniques within this book, you’ll recall other times during your life when you behaved like this.

Remember these dating tips to bring back the fun!

Don’t Linger In The “ZONE”

Remember the old rule of show business: “leave ‘em wanting more.” You need to be the one to end the conversation and excuse yourself while the interaction is at a high point, so that she wants to see you again soon and pick up where you left off.

Otherwise, the longer you drag out the interaction, the greater the chance that she will feel she needs to get back to hustling and making money. Even if she’s totally into the conversation, she can only talk to you for so long before she’ll start to feel that she needs to get back to work.

2 Ways To Close A Stripper On Duty

1. Get Her Phone Number

Plan on calling her/texting her soon to see her outside of the strip club. Hopefully tonight. Be sure to find out during the conversation when her shift ends.

2. Use A 2nd Location

If her shift ends within the next few hours, make a plan to meet her at another location. I suggest you make it a late-night restaurant—strippers are usually hungry after working a long shift.  The key is to invite her to come along and join you somewhere. Lay out a specific plan that is easy for her to agree with.

Set Your Plans In Stone

You may have no intention of heading to this place later tonight, if you’re alone, but you’ve got to present it this way to her—as if your plans for later on are already set, and she’s welcome to come along so you can continue this cool conversation.

In U.S. cities, restaurants like Denny’s, I-Hop, etc are good locations for the meet. Even better are local pub-restaurants where you can grab a burger and some drinks afterwards.

Make it a place that she’s probably already familiar with. If she has no idea where it is, she’s very unlikely to try to drive around and find it in the middle of the night.

Don’t Even Bother Trying To Make A “Date Plan”

Inviting her to dinner or a movie next week while you’re talking to her in the club or while you’re getting a lap dance is pretty much hopeless. If you try to suggest this, she’ll probably agree to it, out of politeness, but she’ll forget all about it as soon as you leave. Besides, she’ll probably be working that night.

Always try to sleep with her tonight. Strippers usually lead busy, hectic (if not chaotic) lives and meet new guys every day. Trying to build a “friendship first” and taking it slow is the downfall of many guys when they’re trying to hook up with women—and this is especially true when you are dealing with strippers. Strike while the iron is hot and the sparks are flying!

Make The First Conversation A Winner!

The first conversation is all about gathering information on her,  communicating your confident, playful personality, and working towards the “close.” Guide the conversation along—never allowing her to control the conversation and the topics—and build your bond with her using the right body language.

Learn the special details about her that you know she doesn’t share with her customers. This ensures that when you do call or text her, she’ll immediately remember who you are, and you can refer to things you talked about—especially the private “in jokes” you shared.

Why is this? This is because without displaying confidence, no amount of flirting will work. In fact, do you know that women can tell how confident you are just by the way you stand? Women always interpret your body language to see what’s REALLY going on.
So how can you portray to women a high level of self-respect that makes them feel attracted to you?

1.  Stand with Powerful Posture

Posture is extremely important when you flirt with women and it’s the most powerful way to convey power and confidence.

Here’s how to correct your posture:

1. Stand in front of a mirror
2. Puff out your chest and make your spine straight
3. Relax your shoulders

Bonus Step: Now slouch over and see how it makes you look. Which image do find more appealing?

Women can tell whether you’ll be interesting or not just by observing your posture as you approach them. And, although posture is important, eyes are your most important asset when it comes to successful body language and flirting.

2. Get Caught Looking

Eyes convey a tremendous amount of information about a person. When you keep eye contact with woman, you say an awful lot about your own self-esteem.

Do not look away when a woman looks at you. I repeat. DO NOT look away when a woman is looking at you. If you do, she will think, “He’s shy, has no confidence and if he has any feelings for me, he’s trying to hide them. I know this because he doesn’t even have the guts to keep looking and be honest about how he feels.”

If you want to utilize the single best way to instantly trigger a woman’s attraction, then keep looking when she looks over.

Here are the three quick steps:

1. Look in her direction until she looks over
2. Hold the look until she looks away
3. Walk over and start flirting with her

If you look at the ground because you’re shy your head will naturally point towards the ground. When your head faces downwards your shoulders tend to roll forward creating terrible posture. That’s why simply looking at the ground can repel a woman.

3. Tilt Your Chin Up

While eye contact and posture are your two most important assets to effectively flirt with women, the positioning of your head can add the finishing touches to your confidence. Understand this:

People want to be around people who are BETTER than they are
People want to hang out with people who are COOLER than they are
People want to learn from people with MORE EXPERIENCE than they have
People want to compete against people with MORE SKILLS than they have

And it’s exactly the same for women. A subtle way to fulfill this natural desire within people is to tilt your chin up, but still make eye contact with the woman while flirting.

Women love it when you’re very sure of yourself. While this technique may seem like a display of arrogance, it doesn’t come across that way.

Without going into it too much, women enjoy men who are arrogant in a humbling, sort of non-offensive, way. Notice how popular and rich people tend to project an aura of arrogance without offending?

Others respect these people because they respect themselves. Use this universal body language to subconsciously communicate success and self-respect. Soon others will believe this about you. Bottom line: Don’t be afraid of rejection. Others will comply.

4. Stand Reasonably Still

Nervous body language is your ticket to a night of loneliness. If you come across as nervous when you introduce yourself to a woman, you will make her nervous. Here are some examples of nervous behavior in a woman:

Flitting their eyes around
Scratching their back, neck, hands or face.
Shuffling their feet
Swaying left to right
Talking in an unnatural or rehearsed tone of voice
Speaking in a monotone and quiet voice
Fidgeting with accessories (phones, watches, bracelets or necklaces)

Sometimes less is more. The less you move your body the more attractive and confident you will appear when trying to meet women.

5. Reward Her with Smiles

This may be hard to understand, but don’t smile all the time. Guys often smile because they’re insecure, but this is not the reason you shouldn’t use your smile. When you can make a woman laugh, smile, and enjoy herself without too much facial expression, you increase the level of mystique surrounding yourself.

Think about it. If you tone down your facial expressions (while also eliminating nervous body language, as discussed above) you don’t give the woman any clear indication that you like her.

If she’s 100 percent sure you like her, there is no mystique. But if at the end of the interaction or date the woman still doesn’t know anything about you and your intentions, she’ll want to find out more. She becomes seduced by her own curiosity.

I know ladies that are skinny and wish they were five pounds heavier. I know girls that are chubby and wish they were 30 pounds lighter. I know women that are tall and they want to be shorter. I know some that are short that want to be taller.

But here’s the issue: you’ve got to stop obsessing about your weight because the more you obsess about your weight, the less life you live. There are men all over the world that love girls of all shapes and sizes.

Every Man Likes Something Different

I have a buddy that loves the exact opposite of what I like. I’m a work out person. I’ve been working out my entire life. I like girls that are short and petite—athletic ladies that love to run along the beach or spend hours in a yoga studio.

I like girls that work out. It’s just what I enjoy. These are the kind of women that I find to have the most physical attraction to.

My buddy laughs at me and he says “you’re only dating these wafers”—that what he calls them. He looks at them and says “you know, you’re going to break that woman! I don’t know how you do it, because for me, I need a woman with meat.”

He says, “I like mine big, powerful. I like a little cushion.”

The two of us are proof that men like the opposite sex to have all shapes and sizes. It’s time you started loving yourself, because that’s the important thing. If you love yourself—I mean, really you love who you are—do you know what’s going to happen?

You’re going to find the guy that loves you just as deeply. In fact, once you’re ready, you’re going to meet a man that love’s you in the proportion that you love yourself. Because that’s how it works.

Embrace Your Body

You might have saddlebags; you might have a little extra thickness on your sides; you may be depressed because one breast is slightly larger than the other being the exact same size—whatever.

But who cares? Men are attracted to girls that find themselves sexy and have confidence.  Using the right body language is key.

I’ve seen women that are heavy, with all of the above “conditions” that would normally upset another woman. But they accept their bodies and walk around confidently. They’ve got that twinkle in their eyes. They just exude sexual energy.

And I’ve got to tell you something: I’m not even attracted to that type of body style, but I can’t keep my eyes off of her because it’s the way she feels about herself.

Look Around!

Stop wasting time obsessing about your body and start obsessing about all the great men that want to absolutely indulge in everything that you are. They want to embrace your beautiful, round, full-figured body. Trust me, there are plenty of them and you should not be afraid of rejection.

Start practicing abundance and start realizing that full-figured women have a wide range of men to date.  Go to a Target. Go to a Walmart. Look at the local women that are built just like you.

Look at the wedding rings on their hands, look at the men that they’re with, and realize that there’s no reason for you to ever be alone. It’s your choice. Embrace your beautiful body now because it’s the only one you’ve got.

Remember what I said before about the importance of leading women. They love it when a guy they’re attracted to starts leading them down the path towards sex, instead of just pretending to be their “friend.”

Consider a typical interaction between a guy and a girl he meets at a bar. He might have strong “conversation game” and be able to entertain her for a while with funny questions, interesting stories, etc.

Flirt From The Start!

If a guy never starts flirting and taking the interaction in a sexual direction, her attraction to him is not going to grow. In her mind, he’s just another “nice guy” who she may enjoy talking to, but she’s not imagining anything happening beyond that. The guys I know who are super-successful with women are great at being a flirt.

Strippers know they are hot; their entire job revolves around looking as hot as possible in order to make money. So while you don’t want to sit there paying her compliments about how beautiful she is, you should let her know (at the right stage) that you’re into her sexually and this isn’t just a chat between two buddies.

Don’t tell her that she’s beautiful, but do give her signs that you’re into her sexually (once you’re deep into building comfort and attraction). Flirting means doing this in a playful way that isn’t weird or creepy.

Escalation is the bridge that takes you from the conversation/comfort stage to the seduction. When a guy doesn’t escalate and suddenly “puts a move” on a girl (like trying to hold her hand, or inviting her back to his place), it feels awkward and forced.

The classic example is the guy who takes a girl on a date, and keeps his hands to himself all night, just making small talk. Then, when he drops her off at her house at the end of the date, he tries to get a goodnight kiss and she turns her head and offers her cheek.

If he had escalated during the date, the goodnight kiss would have been assured. And maybe a lot more. So, you’ll escalate at the strip club in two ways: physical and verbal. These can happen at the same time.

Establish Body Contact

Physical escalation means establishing (subtle) body contact. It’s important for her to get used to your touch, and for you to show her that you can touch her and still control yourself.

In a strip club, this can take some self-discipline. When you’re sitting with a half-naked stripper with fake breasts nearly popping out of her bra, and she’s perfectly willing to sit on your lap and cuddle with you (in order to sell you dances), it’s easy—and tempting—to let her initiate the contact and go along with it.

Instead, you should playfully deflect her early attempts to touch you. (“Whoa, you’re frisky. Don’t treat me like a prom date, ok—not until I get to know you better, at least.)

You’ll be the one to touch her. And you’ll do it in a subtle “invisible” way that never makes her feel uncomfortable, or makes you seem like a customer who wants to cop a feel. By the way, when it comes to making body contact, the fact that a strip club is loud works to your advantage. It gives you a reason to sit close to her and lean in when you speak.

When you agree with something she is saying, and you want to tell her your thoughts, lean in and touch her lightly on the knee as you talk. Caress her knee very gently, then move your hand away.

As you do a “Cold Read,” lean in and touch her hand. Look straight into your eyes as you do this. This heightens the effect.

If you’re telling her something “personal” or sharing an “inside joke,” lean in and whisper it into her ear. Touch her lightly on the forearm. This is an intimate act that will give her goose bumps if done correctly.

If she says something funny (or something you think is totally cool), give her a high-five and clasp her hand in yours for a moment, then let it go. Build the contact.

Keep Your Touches Brief

When the conversation is real, so is the effect of your physical touches. If you haven’t successfully built comfort with her, then any touching that goes on is just typical stripper-customer behavior. Start subtly making contact with her—at the right time—and you’re injecting sexual energy into the interaction.

The trick is to keep your touches brief. The idea is to make her miss your touches. This is what sexual tension is all about: she’s starting to get that horny, tingling feeling and she wants you to touch and caress her more, but you’re only giving it to her in small doses.

When you do this correctly with a woman, the anticipation of your next touch can drive her wild. She might start grabbing you! (This is when you gently ease her away and play “hard to get.”)

You don’t need to have an extremely deep voice, but it should be deep enough to communicate that you’re comfortable in the presence of women. If you notice when you talk to women your voice becomes squeaky from nervousness use this technique to compose your voice.

Use Your Voice Volume

Sometimes for fun I ask women what they like about men. While consciously women want their men to be, “nice, caring, romantic, etc”, unconsciously they want men who are masculine. When I ask what they like, these women respond with things like: “I like a man who holds himself well” “I like a man who knows what he wants” “I like a man who’s sure of himself” “I like a man who’s not intimidated by me” “I like a man who’s not nervous.”

While from first glance these qualities may all seem different, they are in fact all the same. Unconsciously women want men with confidence. Part of a confident voice is the volume you project. Confident men flirt with loud, strong and clear voices.

Un-confident men speak with soft, weak and muffled voices that project fear and low self-esteem. If you want to get the attention of women start speaking with a louder voice and be fearless of rejection.

If women intimidate you, chances are your voice is very soft. Boost your voice to a volume that “seems” too loud and you’ll speak at a more normal volume. Because you’re not used to speaking at this volume it will seem very loud; don’t worry, practice makes perfect.

Monitor Your Voice Speed

Public speaking is a real fear for most people. When somebody stands up to speak you can tell exactly how confident they are just by the speed of their vocals.

When we talk to our friends we speak in a cool calm voice and at a reasonably slow pace. If you hear a terrified person make a speech against their will, you’ll hear the fear. People who are not confident speak at an unnaturally fast pace to “get it over and done with.”

They are so uncomfortable at public speaking, and they rattle off their speech so fast, that most people have trouble getting the main points. Just by listening to the pace, women can determine if you’re nervous.

For those of you who are terrified when meeting women, here’s a great tip. Speak at half the speed you think you should be speaking at and you’ll most likely be talking at a natural pace with great body language.

Learn Voice Timing

Comedians are funny because they deliver their jokes with a great sense of timing. Learn to use emphasis, pauses, pace changes and fluctuating vocal tone with your speaking voice.

If you want to know exactly how to talk to women, study some of the most confident public speakers and coaches of our time. Go to seminars and listen to confident people speak on TV, noting the characteristics of the speakers.

A lot of men say they know how to portray a confident voice, but when it comes time to approach a woman and use this confident voice, they freeze up. Just knowing something doesn’t make you an expert. You have to put what you know into practice.

Watch Your Spoken Words

The words you speak have very little impact on your ability to meet women. Having said that, there are words or lines you can say that will repel women so fast it will make your head spin. Lines that define women as sexual objects, creatures of desire or nothing but a shell of physical beauty don’t work.

You can’t flirt with women by being too direct about your intentions. “Hey cutie,” “babe,” and “hot stuff” are terrible lines for first impressions. As mentioned before, women interpret the meaning behind your words, so think about these words from a woman’s perspective. Whenever in doubt always use the formula below designed to transform action into meaning.

Know How To Use More Than Your Words

As we move onto non-verbal flirting remember that flirting is much more about how you use your voice than the words you actually say. This point has been repeated, but with good reason. When a friend talks about the success he’s had he’ll tell his friends the lines he used rather than what he did and how he acted.

These friends then go and try out their newly found pick up lines, only to be harshly rejected. They conclude the lines don’t work and give up. If they realized that flirting is more about the delivery than the lines, everything would make sense to them.

Don’t Use Pity

If women read about your problems, how depressed you are or how life  sucks, they want to get away. They want to close the browser, hit a video sharing site and watch a clip of Friends or Seinfeld, or do something that will erase the feeling of depression they got when they read your profile. If you  remind them that life is painful, there’s trouble around and the world will  probably come tumbling down anytime soon, you’re going to drive them away. You don’t want that. But, Dave, all I have are painful experiences. How can I avoid talking about these with online dating sites?

There’s a thin line between empathy and pity, and if you can’t prevent yourself from mentioning something painful, you have to be extremely aware of this thin line. You can “mention” a painful past, but avoid talking about it at length. Dishing the dirt about your bad experiences will make it seem like you’re not yet over them. Instead, write about how your pain strengthened your spirit and turned you into the man you are now.

You have to understand that the girl who’s reading your profile page might have gone through the same things. But, like you, she wants to get over these bad experiences and see them in a good way. Talk about the lessons you’ve learned, and how you’re progressing rapidly into a better life. Remember that strength of character and confidence is a heavy aphrodisiac to women this is what they really mean when they say a man is “strong”.

Don’t Convey Anger

Like it or not, we can’t choose who views our profile in dating sites. The girls who will find you there will be from all walks of life, and from any social level. They will have different belief systems, religions, political leanings, convictions. This means you have to take care not to mention something that will strike at a person’s inner core.

There’s a difference between being bold, edgy and unapologetic, and being downright rude will never get you a first date. If you’re unsure about which issues can anger a person, check the terms and conditions of the site you’re in, or think about the unwritten rules of the internet in general.

Issues such as hatred, violence, profanity, discrimination against race, gender and religion or political beliefs can spark a heated argument anywhere, and the virtual world is no exception. Besides, implying that you’re into these things will make her feel like she’s meeting a psycho and you don’t want that.

Don’t Be Boring

The worst emotion in the world is boredom, or ennui, the definition of which is “a feeling of listlessness and general dissatisfaction resulting from lack of activity or excitement.” When you describe yourself as average, normal, plain you will not meet women that you actually want to date.

She will feel bored and move on to find some other profile that will make her feel something, anything. Don’t get me wrong. You might think of yourself as average, normal or plain, but she doesn’t know that you feel that way.

Saying it out loud will plant the impression inside her head. Listen, women want to meet somebody who’s going to make their life more interesting and more fun.

What She Said:

First Date Commandments 1-7

1. Thou shalt not keep your phone on the table.

You need to give your full attention to your date.  Do not text, call or check your email.  If you must text a friend, do it in the ladies room.

2. Thou shalt ask him questions about his family

You are an extraordinary creature and so is he. Do not spend the whole date talking about yourself, makes sure you ask him questions and get to know him on a more personal level.

3. Thou shalt offer to pay half

Chivalry is not dead and its super sweet when a guy will pay for the tab but common sense isn’t dead either and you should never expect a man to pay.  Even if he did ask you out, a woman should offer to pay or buy a round of drinks or leave the tip.

4. Thou shalt not talk about your ex boyfriend

Or any past relationships for that matter.  A first date is a time to start new and fresh.  The guy does not want to hear how your past relationships went sour or hear you bad mouth your ex.  Past relationships is more 3 or 4th date material.

5. Thou shalt not get drunk

A drink or two might be just what you need to calm your nerves but getting smashed on a first date is never a good thing.  By all means, have fun but do not get to the point of slurring your speech or misplacing your items, keep it classy. Besides, few first dates that end in puking have a second date.

6. Thou shalt brag about oneself

There is a huge difference between being cocky and being proud of you.  A first date is a great time to share with him some of your accomplishments, career and socially.  Show him that you have a pride in yourself and what you are doing.  Also share what you hope to achieve in the future.

You don’t need to rattle off your resume, but you should be an alpha male.  A girl who has a passion for something is always a turn on.

7. Thou shalt not treat a date like a therapy session

Maybe your roommate is a slob, or your mom yelled at you or your co-workers are lazy.  A first date is not the time to vent all of this.  You want to keep the conversation lively and positive not negative.  You also don’t want him to think that he needs to somehow make things better or fix you.

What He Said:

First Date Commandments 8-10

There’s only ten first date commandments in the article, and she takes six. Is that the most sexist thing ever, or is the most sexist thing of all time? You decide.

8. Thou shall not read into everything.

Yes, first dates are basically interviews. With alcohol. And sex appeal (hopefully). And while it is only natural to evaluate your potential romantic partner and be aware for red flags, it shouldn’t feel like they’re sitting across the table from an IRS auditor or a CIA operative.

Try not to turn this date into an interrogation.  Don’t let this feel like it’s a bank loan application, you know? You need to know a little about the person, not a lot. You aren’t filing taxes jointly, you’re just trying to figure out if you both want a second date.

9. Thou shall not be yourself.

Look, no one wants to date you. You can’t be yourself and expect to get laid or get a second date. You need to be your best self if you want the guy, the girl, and/or the booty.

Being your best self, doesn’t mean you’re lying to them or pretending to be someone or something you’re not, it means that you are on your best behavior, using confidence and at the absolute top of your game. If you’re not, why bother?

10. Thou shall not over-complicate things. 


Men are not women. They do not have a hidden agenda. They want to find out if they want to bang you, and if you’re cool enough to be around when they’re not, and if it’s going to be too much trouble or if they will have to jump through too many hoops to get in your pants. That’s it.

Women are slightly more complicated, so to speak, but you’re not building the space station here. You’re trying to evaluate the other person and see if you want to move forward.

It’s just a date. If it’s good, or bad, it’s just a date. Do not be afraid of rejection. It should be fun, above all else, and if this one doesn’t go well, there’s always the next one!

But consider this – more than being instruments of vision, eyes have the ability to make somebody feel self-conscious and uncomfortable at a distance. Ever been slapped just by looking at a lady a certain way?

The Eyes Say It All

• The eyes can betray a man’s lack of sexual confidence.
• They reveal his cluelessness as to where her clitoris really is.
• They can say, “Wow!” quicker than a dropped jaw can.
• They reveal how his balls ascended up his throat after ejaculating inside fertile Amy.

Through the eyes, one can invoke serious sexual intent. You can gaze into her soul and proclaim the sensual pleasures about to envelop her body. Eyes reveal your ache for her breasts and curves, they announce your confidence, competence and awareness of what’s about to happen.

One woman required her partner to keep eye contact 85% of the time whenever they are having sex. That way, she doesn’t feel like a sex toy or a glorified giver of sexual favors. They want to be seen.

If you’ve ever been accused of being passionless, unaffected and indifferent in bed – simply increase the eye contact. There might be other goodies to scope on a naked woman, but looking at her eyeballs is just as important and pleasurable.

Increase Intimacy With Eye Contact

To increase and strengthen the bond between couples, there has to be an increase in the frequency and duration of eye contacts. Psychologists have learned that the more a couple gazes at each other, the more drawn and attracted they are to each other.

Moreover, closely acquainted individuals don’t talk through their mouths, but through their eyes. It’s the “I know what you’re thinking” bit. Through eye locks, you can actually be strangers but feel like you’ve been together forever.

Men who intuitively know the power of eye contact may have deliberately disconnected by avoiding them altogether. The absence of intimacy means less complications and an easy transition to the next one-night stand.

Increase Vulnerability With Eye Contact

Just as strong as the desire to be seen, is the fear of being fully known. Eye contacts make her very vulnerable. Actually, it makes both of you vulnerable) With deep eye locks, she’s not only exposing her face, pimples and everything, but her thoughts as well.

Her eyes will be screaming her thoughts. You can see through her, beyond the façade, and that makes her feel very vulnerable. But this is really good news. Believe it or not, vulnerability is an element of hot sex.

Don’t Change Your Behavior

When men hang around with their friends they laugh, make jokes, have fun and don’t take things too seriously. But for some reason, when a man finds himself interested in a beautiful woman, he usually becomes very reserved. He stops laughing. He stops making jokes. He stops teasing. He stops having fun. He stops being flirtatious.

When in the presence of a potential date, instead of keeping up the friendly vibe he has with his friends, he suddenly becomes boring. He won’t make jokes or laugh with the woman, he won’t play around like he does with his friends, and he takes things way too seriously.

Why do men change their behavior around women? They usually don’t’ even realizing they are doing it. The reason is that men are so afraid of losing their only chance with a particular woman that they turn into “Mr. Serious.” Don’t mistaken this for confidence.

Men get so nervous talking to beautiful women that they lose all creativity and can’t make interesting conversation. Fearful that they might say something rude or challenging, they resort to boring “walking on egg shells” conversations, which results in no emotion.

Remember This Simple Law

While men can tell you that it’s important to not be boring when you try to meet women, they often don’t even realize when they’re doing it.

1. When you fear loosing a woman you become cautious
2. When you’re cautious you become serious
3. When you’re serious you become boring
4. When you’re boring women aren’t attracted
5. When women aren’t attracted you don’t get a date

Men have such a strong “I must have this girl” attitude that the more they have physical attraction to a woman, the more serious and boring they become in their poor attempts to date them.

Don’t Beg Her!

Although films and television strongly encourage the idea of begging women, it doesn’t work. These values are used to evoke emotions for the movie audience, and in people take it to heart and buy into the idea that this behavior will lead to success. It always seems like Mr. Romantic is doing the right thing by standing outside a balcony window every night singing love songs, reading poetry and bringing flowers until his dream girl finally falls in love with him.

While these actions may seem romantic and work in movies, we don’t live in the movies; we live in the real world. Women can smell manipulative men ten miles away and have no respect for their child-like behavior.

Strippers are so used to this behavior in the club that they play it off and laugh (unless the guy is being too aggressive). It’s part of the job. But that doesn’t mean they like it.

A stripper will encounter a lot of aggressive, obnoxious customers who love the “power shift” that takes place inside a strip club. But when you present yourself as a laid-back gentleman, you’ll make her feel comfortable and safe with you, and her attraction has a chance to grow.

One act of chivalry is all it takes: a small gesture that shows you respect her as lady and are a protector (rather than a customer, who only cares about his own needs being met). Here are some quick examples of the right actions and body language.

1. Offer Her A Seat

When she sits down next to you, say, “Your feet must be sore from walking around in those heels. Here, give them a rest.” Then, pull up a chair and have her place her feet on them. Or, call to your waitress and have her bring over another chair for your dancer to rest her feet on. This will set precedence for a small date together.

2. Wrap A Napkin Around Her Drink

When the waitress brings your drinks, make a special effort to make sure there is a napkin wrapped around her glass before the drink is handed to her. If there is already a napkin around it when the waitress brings it, adjust the napkin and make it perfect.

If there is no napkin, wrap one around her glass and then hand her the drink. It’s a simple, classy touch that will go a long way when you start flirting.

3. Move Her Seat

If the strip club is crowded, move her seat so that other people aren’t going to bump into her chair. Bring it in closer to you and angle it away from the traffic. Tell her you want to make sure she’s comfortable and that no one brushes up against her.

There are lots of other “acts of chivalry” that you can come up with. Look out for opportunities to do one or two nice little things that she doesn’t expect. (Don’t go overboard, or you’ll appear to be kissing her ass; one or two is enough.)

By taking a moment to make sure she feels comfortable and respected, you’re separating yourself in a big way from the average customer.

Your goal is to always place women in a comfort zone. This is where physical attraction has a chance to develop. This means your body language must always convey a level of cool. No nervous fidgeting. Maintain eye contact. Don’t keep your knees together and your hands in your lap; spread your body out across your seat. Take up space.

These are signs of a man who is confident and relaxed. Nervous guys make women nervous.

1. Confidence

The reason most girls are attracted to jocks, bad boys and other men that don’t seem to be “right” for them, is because these men usually act arrogant.

For this to make sense you must understand that women are insanely good interpreters. If a man says or does something, a woman will look beneath his comments or actions and ask herself, “What is he really trying to say?”

Arrogance is interpreted as confidence. And as you may know, confidence is the most important trait you can portray to a woman. Confidence alone will get you more dates than you could ever imagine.

The essence of flirting is based on projecting confidence around women. In addition, arrogance communicates “higher status” and an “I’m too cool” attitude, which appeals to most a girl’s need to climb the social ladder.

2. Dominance

A significant part of being what women call “a real man” is taking charge in all situations. Girls will often say, “I like a man who knows what he wants.” Unfortunately, this statement is baffling to most men.

A man who knows what he wants doesn’t ask for permission. He takes the leadership role in every situation and expects others to comply. The next time you are out in clubs or bars, watch as the dominant men control the situation when they ask a girl out, talking to them, taking them by the hand and guiding them through the club to another location.

These men expect women to follow their lead. They don’t politely ask – they just do it. You might think this attitude seems rude or careless, but what you need to understand is that women want men to act this way.

Why do you think men who ask, “What movie do you want see?” get responses such as…

“I don’t know.”
“I don’t really care.”
“You decide.”

Women want men to be the leaders. Men who ask women to make these decisions get vague responses because women want men to lead. The woman is offering the man a chance to affirm his manliness. An “alpha male” will make decisions.

It may seem daunting to maintain this sort of control, but as these behaviors are broken down into actions, the need for this will become clear.

When women say that they are attracted to strong men, they don’t mean physically strong men; they mean men who can control the situation.

3. Humor

Humor is a very powerful. Everyone loves to laugh, and people love to hang around those who make them laugh.

Humor is something that all women are looking for in a man. But what you may not realize is that humor alone isn’t enough to attract women. You also need to maintain eye contact when you are approaching her.

If you become naturally funny, you’ll be able to keep fun conversations going with women as long as you want. You don’t want your humor to come across too goofy, nor do you want to look like a “try-hard” when you crack a joke.

Humor combined with body language is a powerful conversational tool that everyone needs to develop if they want to succeed socially.

4. Higher Social Status (Be Cooler)

You must understand that along with physical attraction comes social status. Just think back to school – all the cool people hung out together, as did all the other social groups with their respective peers.

The advantage you have when meeting new women is your hidden social status. Most women make dozens of assumptions about you the minute they lay eyes on you, and this includes your social status.

Women want to hang out with guys that are cooler than them. When you talk to a woman who catches your eye, you must always portray yourself as being “cooler” than her, or at least “as cool”. This increases the likelihood of her being interested in a date.

So how do you accomplish this? You accomplish this by increasing your coolness quotient.

• Don’t act insecure and always ask “Is everything Ok?”, “Have I done something wrong?”, “Do you like me?”, “What do you think of me so far.” Never say these things!

• Dress in fashionable, comfortable clothes that you feel great in.

• Be selective with the people you hang around, as well as which women you choose to date.

Now that you understand attraction, and what it is that makes women feel attracted to men, let’s discuss the basics of flirting. And after this, we’ll talk about how to incorporate these must-have qualities into your conversations.

Understand Her Work

Express your understanding of her line of work, and point out how you’re actually impressed by dancers for reasons other than their hot bodies. (Remember, it’s “dancing,” not “stripping.”)

Give her a little ego boost by complimenting her on the “skills” she has developed at her job. For example, commend her on her ability to read people. Remember to do this with confidence.

YOU: “I’ve noticed that dancers have an amazing ability to read people—they always seem to know exactly what type of guy they’re talking to, and what he’s looking for. I’d love to have that talent, it would come in handy at my job.”

By saying this, you’re letting her know that you don’t hold her profession against her. You actually respect what she does, and you understand there’s a lot more to her job than just looking good in a bikini.

Making a statement like this is another way to break down the barrier that exists between you (the customer) and her (the stripper). When this barrier has been removed, the two of you will be able to communicate on a more real, honest level. Remember to use eye contact when you are communicating with her.

Use Your Occupation

If your occupation or your career goals happen to be one of your attractive qualities, this statement is a “link” that will steer the conversation onto this topic. Saying “it would really help me at my job” is probably going to prompt her to ask you what you do for a living.

You can then mention your job to her. Just keep it brief. No matter how lofty your title is, or how much money you make, you don’t want to sound like you’re bragging or EVER trying to impress her. If you’re lucky, she will put you in the friend zone.

WACK TACTIC: “I’m a senior vice president with the Highland Real Estate Corporation. My specialty is doing home loans. Here, let me give you my card…”

MACK TACTIC: “I work in real estate. It’s a great match for my talents and I love what I’m doing right now. So let me guess, Melissa—the money’s pretty good at this place for right now, but you’ve got your eye on doing way cooler in the future. I’m right, aren’t I?”

Bear in mind, dancers are constantly meeting chumps who try to impress them with how much money they’ve got, the car they drive, the house they just bought, etc. It’s hardly an original quality for a guy to possess in a strip club. But if you have an occupation that you love, or a goal that you are passionate about, mention it. That’s huge.

Communicate Passions And Ambition

It is far more important to communicate your passion and ambition than it is to talk about your job title, salary, material possessions, etc. It doesn’t matter if you’re a temp right now, an intern, or even unemployed—as long as you’ve got ambitions and passions that you can communicate with the right body language.

WACK TACTIC: “I’m between jobs right now. The job market sucks, no one’s hiring.”

MACK TACTIC: “Right now I’m considering some different opportunities. It’s important for me that I’m passionate about anything that I get involved with. Life’s too short to be doing something you’re not passionate about, don’t you think?”

Again, always keep phrasing in mind. It’s all about how you phrase this information. Even if you’re a millionaire CEO, you’ve got to maintain an element of mystery and communicate that passion without buying a lap dance.

One stripper told me the most repulsive line she’d ever heard from a “bigshot.” He whispered in her ear, “If I told you who I really am, you’d cum right now. Let’s just say, if you treat me right, I could change your life.”

The only way this douche bag “changed her life” was by buying enough dances that night to cover her rent and car payment. After she was done dancing, she told him a fake phone number and went on to the next customer.

Generate Real Attraction

Half of the guys that come into her club like to run their mouths about how much money they’ve got, and by now she is well aware that 90% of the time the guy is full of crap while using bad seduction techniques.

So you see, even if you are wealthy and successful, it’s not going to generate any real attraction from her. Passion and ambition are the qualities that matter—and if you truly do possess those qualities, women will gravitate towards you. Passionate, ambitious men always wind up succeeding.

So when she asks you about “what you do,” you’re going to give her a response that doesn’t include details, but conveys your passion. Common flirting techniques don’t work. Toss the ball back into her court. You want to give her a chance to talk about her own passions, and you want her to know that you respect her as an intelligent, sophisticated woman.

You’re not a “customer” in her eyes and you want her to know that in your eyes, she’s not just a brainless slut in a G-string.

You go in and they get you a really nice brochure and you take it home. What you want is a profile that reveals just enough to tease a girl into being even more curious. Use these strategies when trying to meet women online.

Choose Your Headline Wisely

You need a witty headline because the headline is one of the first things a woman is going to see on your profile. Some online dating sites will call it a “tagline”, which is basically the same thing. I always use something funny as a headline. If you’ve read any other pick-up stuff, maybe you had a funny saying or a funny line you can use. I always rotate and try different things.

Here are some of them:

“I’m not feeling the connection… Do you know what I mean?”
“I think I’m going to have to break up with you.”
“I’m ex-husband material”
“I’m ex-boyfriend material”

You can say things like these and it will crack them up because these are one-liners. You can always use movie lines. I love using different movie lines. What are some funny movies that you can think of? For everybody it’s going to be different.

What’s funny for me might not be funny for you. What kind of funny movies come to mind? What kind of lines
come to mind. I always use those in my profile and in my headline because it’s starts everything off on a funny note.

Choose Bio Pictures Carefully

What I discovered is that looks don’t really matter as much as guys tend to think they do. Men like to think that women are drawn to their physical attraction, but this simply isn’t true. Granted, women especially online are paranoid about the height. The height issue is real big for a lot of women.

As far as the photos go, what I found to work really well are photos that convey what you’re saying in your profile. So if you’re talking about traveling, have pictures of you in different places because you’re conveying that. If you talk about how you love museums or you’re an artist, show you and some of your artwork in some of your pictures.

What I also found worked really well were pictures of myself in a suit. If you wear one for work, that’s great. Get a picture of you when you’re at work. Women always love a man who looks good, especially in a suit and tie. You can never go wrong with that. You probably already have these kinds of photos on your social networking profiles.

Include Group Photos

The mistake that very often cripples a lot of guys is they have all their pictures with them by themselves. Think about what you’re a conveying to a woman subconsciously. You’re conveying loneliness. You want to make sure you have people in your pictures where they’re smiling and having fun. This will give more of a chance for a first date.

You’re by yourself in every single picture so what do you think woman is going to think. You’re by yourself, you have no friends. What kind of woman wants to be with a guy who has no friends? If you’re a teacher, a photo of you with your kids at school will work great. Build a sense of confidence in your photos.

Get Your Photos Rated

One of the things I created was this system of getting my pictures rated. What I tend to think is three to five pictures is more than enough. You never want to have more than five pictures. You want to leave a little bit of mystery there. Three to five pictures should do it. What you want to do is take your pictures and go to this website called www.HotorNot.com. It’s free.

All you do is upload your pictures and women will rate your pictures from 1 to 10. You just leave it up there for a little while and you’ll kind of get an idea as to which pictures the women from all over the world or all over the country are looking at, and which ones they like the best. What better way to figure out which pictures to put up on your profile then to have women tell you.

Don’t be afraid of rejection when getting your photos rated. This is a chance to see what REAL women think about your pictures.

Make Her WANT to Contact You First

In order to do that, you need the right bait. It’s just like fishing. If you want the fish to bite, you have to give them the right bait. One of the best baits you can use is called “Desire.” When you’re writing, you want to build desire in the girl. The more you express that you’re cool, you’re funny, you have friends, you lean an interesting life and you’re carefree, the more she wants to meet you.

While doing my research on how to date online, one of the things I started looking at were some online escort sites. I found a trend. I noticed how the professional escorts would always talk about experiences. They would never say, “I’m 5’7, 110 pounds, 34DDs, I got a great ass like JLo.”

The pictures on the escort sites would convey that but the words on the page to build that desire always talked about experiences, stories, places where she could meet you, things like that you could do with her. Steal this strategy and build desire.

There’s a reason that nothing you’ve ever found online or in dating guides has worked before! They don’t have the “loophole” in female psychology that will allow YOU to know (and secretly influence) how a girl feels about you before you ever make a move. You’re about to learn the insider secrets on how you can STOP REJECTION forever and quit getting stuck in the dreaded friend zone.

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WARNING: Watch the entire video – the end may SHOCK you!

The dating tips and seduction tactics out there now are mostly ones you’ve heard before – and they’re the ones you KNOW don’t work. You know because you’ve tried them.

Seducing a woman isn’t easy (that’s an understatement!) In fact, it can be one of the most frustrating, terrifying and nerve wracking things out there!

You’ve been there before – too scared to ask a hot girl out, too nervous to even get a complete sentence out of your mouth without looking like a fool.

Are You Sick And Tired Of Watching Rich Or Good Looking Guys Get ALL The Girls?

You’re a pretty good catch, right? You would treat a girl like a queen – that is, if you could ever get her to go out with you! It must be exhausting to go out every night in the hopes that you’ll hit it off with a girl, but they’re ALL hanging on the arms of other rich, good looking guys!

They SHOULD be hanging all over you!

You might have tried to approach hot women, and you might have even settled for the less attractive ones  just so you could attempt to strike up a conversation with one. How empty did you feel when you left the club ALONE? How frustrated were you when every attempt you made at conversation with a woman was blown off? How envious were you of the guys in the club that made talking to women look absolutely effortless?

But you’re about to find out something THEY have no clue about – the “loophole” in the female brain that will allow you to read her thoughts as if they were written down on paper! 

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We guarantee those “suave guys” that get all the women DON’T know these psychological secrets that will help you UNLOCK a woman’s brain. They’ll be SHOCKED when the girls they were talking to and having fun with start gravitating towards YOU!

The only reason they won’t be BEGGING you to reveal your secrets (the ones you’re about to learn) is because they’ll be to embarrassed and proud to admit that YOU one upped them! 

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So, it is also natural that once you have what you want, you don’t obsess about it the same way.

If you were dreaming about having an amazing sports car and finally bought it after 10 years, the desire to want the car would disappear as soon as you get it.

All of us have the desire have more money, or to even be rich. Well, everyone except rich people.

Wealthy people constantly explain to others that being rich is “not all it’s cracked up to be” and that they want more from their lives too.

In this example, even rich people want more out of life. They’re usually unhappy because they crave a long term relationship, which they may find difficult to achieve because of their heavy involvement in building wealth for themselves. This is a core concept that is very important to understand, and one that is heavily linked to flirting.

UNIVERSAL LAW: People Want What They Can’t Have

Now, think very carefully about how this scenario could be relevant in the dating world. Very feminine beautiful women are shown interest from eager and horny men every day of their lives. By the time these young women reach adulthood their experience with men, dating and relationships is considerably higher than the men who don’t date often.

These women are approached countless times a week by men communicating their interest in them. This may be flattering for awhile, but like everything else, after a while it gets “boring”. If she could have any man within five seconds of meeting him, where is the challenge in that?

People want to lead spontaneous, wild and unpredictable lives. But in order for this to happen, people need opportunities to experience the unexpected, the challenging and the mysterious.

So if a woman is 100% sure she can have a man, because he communicated this in some really obvious way, how much effort is she going to put into calling him, making an effort to talk to him or begging him to catch up?

Of course she wouldn’t chase him, because she knows he’ll be there for her whenever she wants. This encourages her to take him for granted. You must have confidence that you are a challenge to her.

Don’t Suck Up To Women

Women are constantly interpreting men’s actions and the words they say. Their minds are always analyzing your moves in order to better understand your intentions. But if you can keep a woman guessing by being playful, challenging, fun and mysterious, you are much more likely to engage her very quickly.  Observe how these two situations compare and differ.

Negative Interpretation

HE JUST said:, “Wow, you’re really beautiful.”
SHE INTERPRETS THIS AS: He’s only interested in me physically because he doesn’t even know anything about me. I don’t like him.
RESULT: She’s repelled.

Woman’s Positive Interpretation

HE JUST: Poked his tongue out at me!

SHE INTERPRETS THIS AS: He’s very confident, mysterious, funny, secure, in control, hard to get, playful, and really fun! He’s not just interested in my looks because he’s not sucking up to me like all the other guys. In fact, I’m not even sure if he is interested in me. I’m going to keep flirting with him and get to the bottom of this.

RESULT: She’s attracted.

Do you see how challenge attracts women? Now that you understand why this type of flirting is necessary, let’s look at more examples that can help you attract the sort of woman you are looking for. By learning verbal techniques and body language that works, other aspects of your personality will develop automatically, and transform you into the irresistible man women want to meet.

Woman’s Positive Interpretation

HE JUST SAID: “You look like a dork in that hat.”
SHE INTERPRETS THIS AS: He’s confident and independent. He’s not kissing up to me like all the other guys and he isn’t trying to get anything from me – or is he? I like him.
RESULT: She’s attracted.

Can you see how telling a woman that she looks like a dork can work so well? Why don’t women date men who desperately want them? Women don’t find these men challenging. They don’t find them “worth it.” What is not earned is not valued.

Utilize Natural Situations

Initiating touch with long-time partners is easy because you’ve been been with them for long. You can be as forward as cupping the breasts while watching the evening news and she’ll probably not bludgeon you. It’s a lot different with new partners – the best move is to look for situations that naturally promote initial touches.

Context and timing are important. It’s more natural for example, to be bumping bodies in a packed club than in a quiet and empty museum.

Acclimatize Her

So your hands straight to the chest is not usually a sane first move. Always start with the safer parts of her anatomy. Smooth guys work best by smoothly transitioning from low impact to high impact areas without the girl being fully conscious or defensive about it.

Start with her fingers, hands, elbows and shoulders. Rushing to erotic regions on a first date is stupid, go too fast and she’ll slam the brakes on you. High impact zones (eg. breasts & inner thighs) will get her worked up, but they work only after a certain level of comfort is achieved.

Dealing with them too early in the game will only reap the negative. So acclimatize low impact zones first before planning an assault on areas where the sun don’t shine.

Your timeline will vary from woman to woman, so calibrate from her reactions and the situation. In time you will know how your wife, girlfriend or date simmers best.

Learn HOW To Touch Them

How you touch them is of prime importance. You want to send the message that you’re a sensual guy comfortable in his own skin. Never stroke a woman and display the, “I’M REALLY NOT SURE ABOUT THIS” look. It will make her uneasy and uncertain about you, she’ll get weirded out.

When touching seems like a big deal for you, it also becomes a big deal for her, because just as you’re calibrating from her reactions, she is also calibrating from your leading! This is Psychology 101.

If you’re already straining to touch her even at low impact areas, how can you seriously be thinking about having sex? If you can’t even confidently land your hands on top of her shoulders, how can you get your body on top of her?

She may like you a lot, but as a lady, she is very unlikely to initiate touching. Even in this age, lots of women would still rather wait. So get over it, break the touch barrier yourself.

She Wants You To Touch Her

Her skin, the largest organ in her body, responds to tactile stimulation – every last centimeter of it. Soulful touching embraces her as a whole, not just a few special areas. Over-attentiveness to special zones only makes the rest of her fade to the background.

Instead, search and stimulate every nerve, every corner, discover uncharted paths and awaken every inch of her being. Being thorough is the name of the game.

1. Say No to “Just Online” Relationships

I’m not keen on the idea of getting stuck in a “just online” relationship. You know the type of relationship that gets you chatting idly with a girl about stuff, a few hours a day for months or years? Then, before you know it, you’re getting all lovey-dovey every time she sends you an email peppered with heart emoticons.

You’re not having sex but you’re keeping the fantasy that someday, you will get the confidence to ask her out. Do NOT get stuck in an online relationship, and use dating sites to get phone numbers and set up dates. In case a girl gets coy and refuses to meet up, consider it a red flag.

There are many reasons why women start “just online” relationships, and some of these include relieving stress, getting some excitement going while the hubby is sleeping and whatever else. Remember, don’t hold out for a girl who isn’t entertaining the idea of meeting you. Don’t lose sleep over the reason why she doesn’t want to meet up, either.

2. Say No to Instant Messenger Chat

The problem with instant messenger is she knows where you are at any given point. Obviously to a limit, but she knows when you’re home, when you’re online, when you’re not online, when you’re sleeping, and when you’re out.

Plus, you’re supplicating to her. In other words, you sent her an e-mail and you asked for her number or you might not have even asked for her number yet but she responds back saying, “Hey, let’s instant message. Here’s my IM screen name.”

It’s a test. She’s testing you to see how committed you are with what you want, with your belief. If you give her your IM screen name or you IM her, you just failed that test. You’re probably going to trudge along with a “just online” relationship if you let her get away with controlling how you communicate. Rely on your online dating profile more so than an IM message.

3. Don’t Let Her Own You

She knows that you’re a wuss and she knows that she owns you. That’s something you definitely don’t want to do. At that point, you’re way too available so you want to avoid this at all costs. If she e-mails you asking for you to chat on instant messenger, ignore it. Let me say that again—ignore it! Act as if she didn’t say anything like that.

There’s another concept associated with online dating that says “Act, Don’t React”. You never want to react to what she says, you just want to act. Just keep going forward. Make believe she didn’t say anything at all and just ask her for her phone number. You could say something like “Hey, Mrs. A. Listen, I’m just way too busy to instant message.

Let’s talk on the phone. What’s your number?” Did you see how simple that was? It’s three phrases. It doesn’t have to be more complicated than that. What you’re doing is not giving her a choice. You’re telling her that instant messenger is not going to work, you want to talk on the phone, “What’s your number?” What can she do? She can either respond with her number or not.

4. Do NOT Over-Sell

I found out early on that the women who go to online dating sites receive three types of emails. Number one, they get a long email containing a novel about a guy’s sob story, a broken heart, a yearning for a woman who understands him etc. Number two, they get confessions of love from total strangers (basically, guys that have seen these women’s profile and have decided that they’re in love). And number three, email from some old men regarding money.

4 Traits That Are Essential For Attracting Women

1. Confidence

By teasing women you’re communicating “I can have you if I want,” and if girls are attracted men with confidence, what could possibly be better than that? Overconfidence. The reason women always pick the bad boys and jerks is because they are cocky and sure of themselves. Arrogance isn’t always a negative characteristic. Think about it. Arrogance means that you’re absolutely certain that you’ll succeed.

2. Leadership

By teasing women you’re leading the conversation. You’re doing what is known as “taking control of the frame”. By this I mean you tell the woman the “terms and conditions” of the interaction. As explained earlier, physical attraction is only part of the equation. The leadership in your conversation is going to determine whether or not you get the girl.

3. Socially Superiority

By teasing her you communicate that you’re cooler than her. Girls are constantly interpreting everything you do. When you tease them it conveys to them that you have higher standards because you need more than just a pretty face.

4. Mystery

By teasing a woman you confuse her about your real intentions, and that makes her curious to find out what they are. She’s wondering if you really like her. Sure you asked for her for a first date, but then you called her a dork. What’s she suppose to think of that?

How to Act Around Women

If you haven’t noticed already, this formula of how to meet women and building tension is based on two main attitudes. The best way to act around women so they feel attracted is by projecting arrogance and superiority. Every single person has an instinctive need to climb the social ladder. This isn’t something we decided as a “society”, it’s human behavior that has been around for thousands of years.

Similarly, humans (men and women) have a need to climb the social ladder as well, and if somebody offers them a way to climb that ladder, they’ll take it.

1. People only want to hang out with people who are COOLER than they are.

2. People only want to learn from people that are MORE EXPERIENCED than they are.

3. People only want to compete with people that are MORE SKILLED than they are.

It’s a natural part of life to grow, and part of this growing includes  acquiring higher status. The need for high status is often the unconscious reason people do the things they do.

How to Develop the Right Attitude

The natural seducer projects only powerful positive beliefs. This allows him to approach and succeed with beautiful women everywhere without even thinking about it.

After successfully having enough positive experiences to reinforce your mindset, this is the positive belief system you want to develop. These powerful beliefs are the only things that separate success from failure. You must whole-heartedly believe:

Women love sex
Women love me
I have nothing to lose
If she’s not interested, it’s her loss – not mine
There are plenty more women out there anyway

Imagine This: How would you act if you had 200 million dollars in your bank account, 20 beautiful women chasing you all day and an amazing body that other men would kill for?

Walk through the world with this attitude and see how you come across. Even if you are blue in the balls, you must present a challenge and show that you don’t desperately need any woman in order to actually get her. To be successful in sales a man must always project a sense of success, even if he’s not successful. Similarly, if you follow this principle with women, I guarantee you’ll see results.

If you are being set up on a date, there are a few things that you can do to make the process as painless as possible. Blind dates do not have to be excruciating. They can even be fun. Here are a few dating tips to get through the date and enjoy yourself along the way.

Meet Up First

Going on a blind date with somebody that you don’t know can be extremely awkward. Unless you hit it off right from the start, you could be in for a long night with weird silences and bad flirting. One of the easiest ways to go on one of these dates is to not go on one of these dates. Convince your friend to go out to an event with you and have the guy meet you there before you go on a one-on-one date.

This way you can use your friend as a buffer between the two of you to gauge whether or not you would really want to go out with this person via a solo date. You can even make it a double date. Double dates take all of the pressure off of not knowing the person while combining a familiar face.

Keep Things Simple

Blind dates are not meant for extravagance. If you’re going on a date with somebody that you’ve never met before, keep it simple. Meeting up for a drink is one of the best ways to gauge whether or not you actually have chemistry or a connection with this person.

Going out to an extravagant dinner with somebody that you do not even know can set your bank account back while making him feel obligated to pay the expenses. Keeping things simple is a low investment in yourself and in the person. While this might seem a little impersonal, you should understand that there is no obligation to this person and it is a first date.

Be Yourself

There’s no reason to go on a blind date with somebody if you are not going to be yourself. While being yourself is one of the most common dating tips out there, it’s there for a reason. Never lie to a date, especially if they know a friend or coworker.

Lies will eventually get back to your friend and could even get back to the date, making them feel bad about themselves.If you really like the date and feel the need to lie about your credentials, stop yourself.

If somebody doesn’t like you for you then that’s just the way that things are. More than likely they will see you as the fun, open-minded woman that goes on a date with somebody they’ve never met before and they will take notice of your best qualities. No guy will ever want to be with a girl who is putting on a show, so if he says something you don’t like, call him out on it.

Have An Escape Plan

One of the best tactics for singles is to have an escape plan. More than likely the guy is going to contact you asking you to either grab dinner or drink. Before you respond, put an escape plan into place. One of the best escape plans out there is to tell the guy that you are meeting up with friends later but you would like to get together to grab a drink or dinner.

This gives you a built-in time frame for if the date goes sour. This will also give me an excuse to look over at your phone to see what time it is without seeming rude. Tell the guy that you are meeting some friends two hours after the date is planned. For instance if you meet for dinner or a drink at 8 be sure to tell him that you are meeting friends at 10.

This way the date actually only has to last about an hour and a half because you’ll need enough time to go meet your friends. If the date is going really well, you can always tell him that you can be late or that you are having more fun with him than you would be with your friends.

I don’t believe that you should try to avoid buying dances and drinks, because you don’t want to give girls  the impression that you’re trying to avoid spending any money at all. I say, skip the lap dances (since this frames you as a “customer”) but do buy her a drink—or several. But here’s the key thing to remember. When you offer to buy her a drink, it’s all about how you phrase it. By phrasing it the right way, you’re communicating SIX important elements.

1. Make Her Earn The Drink

She is earning this drink because I find her interesting and want to know more about her. This is not an offer I would make to most of the dancers here. This is a special circumstance. I’m not a dude who buys drinks for any chick who sits down next to me; this girl has sparked my curiosity. I’m also using the right body language so she knows I’m not like the rest of the customers in the club.

2. Impress Her With Thoughtfulness

In this case, I told her she had a  “deep personality.” Is this really true? Maybe. We’ll see. But every woman likes to think they have a deep personality, and so my comment makes me seem perceptive. It also makes her curious to talk to me further and see what I else I might “know” about her. I’m also making these statements with full confidence so she doesn’t think that I’m faking it.

3. Turn The Tables On Her

By saying “there are some things I want to ask you,” I’m turning the tables. She is the one who is going to have to answer my questions and demonstrate whether or not she is worthy of more of my time and interest. This is a very powerful psychological tactic that you can use when trying to meet women.

Think about most initial conversations between men and women. It’s the guy who feels like he’s “auditioning” and needs to provide all the right answers. The Mack flips it around and makes her feel the need to impress him, and demonstrate that she is on his level.

4. Use A Persuasion Tactic

“There are some things I want to ask you.” I’m giving her a reason why our conversation needs to continue: there are things I need to know before I ask a girl out. (This is also going to spark her curiosity; what exactly do I want to know? I’ll wait for the drinks to come before I tell her.)

By the way, studies conducted by seduction experts have shown that the word “because” is one of the most powerful words in the English language. It is a psychological motivator.

Ask a person to do something, and they might question it, or wonder why it’s necessary. Tell them they need to because there is a reason, and they’ll instinctively want to follow your lead. This is a great tactic to use in a strip club.

5. Buy Time

Buying this drink will buy you time to continue building a connection with her, instead of playing her game and blowing money on lap dances. And, she won’t feel as though you are wasting her time. In fact, she will usually look at this time as a break from the hustle.

You’re going to use this time to make her feel physical attraction towards you, get her to view you as a romantic option instead of a customer, and either make plans to meet her after her shift or get her phone number to set up a future date (which I will explain how to do a bit later).

6. Be Friendly With The Waitress

When your waitress comes over to take your drink order, this is when the “alliance” you’ve created with her is going to pay off. The friendlier your waitress acts towards you, the more comfortable the dancer is going to feel with you.

If the waitress treats you like just another anonymous customer, the dancer will view you as one. But if she gives you a smile and says your name, and you have another short, friendly chat with her, then your  dancer will recognize that you’ve got value in this place.

This happens because of the groundwork you laid earlier; you tipped your waitress the correct way, spent a couple of minutes to build a connection with her, and won her over. She’s on “your team.” This reinforces in the dancer’s mind that you’re a cool, charismatic guy: you know people here, and people know and respect you.

You want her to view you as a person—and as a possible sexual partner—instead of another lonely “chump customer” looking to shell out money for companionship.

Expect The Unexpected

At first you send an email to a girl who has great photos and lives near you. But what if you find out through her reply that she isn’t your type? For instance, what if you get an e-mail response with a sentence that says, “By the way, I really know how to please a man. I used to be one.”

When I saw this in my inbox, I immediately freaked out. I went to their online dating profile and I was looking at this pictures and thinking, “Oh my god, this is a transsexual? You have got to be kidding me.” The lesson that I learned with that was you really never know what to expect so you have to be prepared to screen who you go for as the correspondence on the site progresses.

Be In Control

Having sex, getting a girlfriend and landing more dates than you can imagine are priorities, but always remember what you’re there for: to be with women you really dig. It’s OK to screen the women you date. Every month I was getting 30 to 50 phone numbers.

I was on the phone nonstop, setting up dates and running it like a business. At one point I got this e-mail from a girl and she seemed pretty nice. She had a headshot picture. I wasn’t too sure so I was like, “Hey, that’s just a headshot picture.

Do you have another picture you can send me?” Don’t’ be afraid to ask for pictures. If you’re not sure about going on a first date with a woman, ask for pictures. What’s interesting is when you ask a woman for pictures it kind of sets up the frame of you are selecting her and you’re  not really sure about her so she’s going to have to prove yourself to you.

Now think about how powerful that is psychologically. This is all going on before you even meet. If a woman goes down that path, she’s already basically said mentally to herself, “This guy’s in control. I’m supplicating to him. I’m chasing after him.” So it’s very powerful.

Don’t be afraid of rejection. A lot of guys are afraid to ask. Being in control of who you date is a good thing, and it will increase your market value exponentially. When women realize you’re abiding by your own rules, they subconsciously follow.

Don’t Be Afraid To Meet Women Online

It’s OK to meet women online. The reason why I’m devoting a section on this is because I’ve met men who think it’s beneath them to get dates online. Some may even say those who use internet dating sites to meet girls can’t do it the “normal” way.

I’ll be the first to admit that I got into online dating sites because picking up girls in bars didn’t work for me, but after I’ve gotten used to dating women I meet online, and building relationships and friendships with these women, the same ‘stereotype’ for guys who go online because they couldn’t meet girls in bars didn’t apply anymore.

Think about online dating like you’re on a train. You start slowly then you gather speed, and soon it’s going so fast that you forget about how slow it was when it started. When you get your groove on and you’re having the time of your life meeting and dating women, your confidence grows and your social life gets better.

Develop The Skills So you Can Meet Women Anywhere

When you get to this point, does it mean you’re going to stop using the internet to get dates? Heck, no. Online dating is a PART of a strategy that works, and because it’s working beautifully for you, you can keep at it. Frankly, any guy who snubs online dating is seriously missing out.

Singles who are worth dating are really busy, either with school or work. They’re also constantly connected to the net to check emails. During a busy work week, they will not have time to go out and meet people at night to unwind, BUT they can spend several minutes to a few hours to log in to Facebook, their favorite dating sites, or both.

What do all these mean to you? If you meet and correspond with a gorgeous woman through internet dating during the time she’s actively looking, you can easily schedule a date with her for the weekend or the next. If you’re so inclined, you can take her to meet with your friends or hers in a bar where a multitude of men are ogling your date, hoping they could meet someone like her that night.

1. Give Her An Ego Boost – THEN Pull Back

Start off by giving her an ego boost. Confidence is key. Tell her how insightful she is—and made her think you’re impressed by her— pull back and make it seem like you’re not that interested in her after all.  Say something like “It’s too bad I swore off dating dancers, because I can tell you and I would probably get along.”

Mentioning that you “swore off dating dancers” is almost certainly going to make her ask why. It sounds like a bit of a “dis”—like her job disqualifies her from dating you. You’re pushing her away.

2. Use A Variety Of “Push Back” Lines

Here are some other lines to “push” her back and make her think you’re not impressed by her These things should be said playfully. Smile. You don’t want to come off as being obnoxious. And DO NOT be afraid of rejection.

• “You and I way too similar, and that never works in a relationship. We’d fight all the time and have hot make-up sex – the sex would be amazing for sure, but I don’t know if it would be worth the drama.”
• “The last time I dated a dancer, we were so attracted to each other that all we did was have crazy animal-like sex. We couldn’t even hold a normal conversation. So I promised myself I would never date a dancer again—the sex was amazing, don’t get me wrong, but I’m looking for more than that.”
• “It’s too bad that I gave up dating dancers, because you and I might actually get along.”
• “I’m just here for a drink. If you’re looking to make money, those guys over there look kinda lonely and desperate.”
• “You are pretty cute, but you’re not really my type.”
• “Even if I did hang out with dancers, I don’t think you and I would get along.”

3. “Pull Her” Back In

After “pushing” her back and making her think she doesn’t measure up to your standards, or that she’s not compatible with you, a short time later you want to say something that pulls her back in. Pay her a little compliment and make it sound like maybe she is cool enough to hang with an alpha male like yourself.

When you’ve already demonstrated that you are a difficult guy to impress, your compliments will carry much more weight.

So, after making a comment like, “It’s too bad I swore off dating dancers,” or “You’re cute, it’s a shame you’re not my type,” you can keep talking to her, get her to reveal something about herself, and say:

• “So, you’re not only one of the cuter girls working here, you can actually hold a conversation. You must have regulars at each other’s throats to get dances from you.”
• “Considering all the drunken idiots that must bother you at this place, you’re surprisingly fun and laid back.”
• “Have you ever taken dance lessons? You move really gracefully.”
• “Aside from dancing, what’s your best talent?” (Then compliment her on it, tell her that’s really cool and interesting, etc.)

Again, what you’re doing here is making her qualify herself to you. You’re encouraging her to demonstrate that she’s not the typical stripper who’s trapped in “the lifestyle.”

Provide And Protect

Women bear children, men don’t. So while a man’s selection criteria are motivated by the potential health of his future children, a woman’s selection criteria are completely different. Men don’t need to be physically attractive, because women aren’t looking for “health signs.”

A woman is looking for her man’s ability to protect her and provide for her, increasing her chances of raising children that will be protected and provided for after they’re born.

Women are responsible for giving birth to healthy babies. Men are responsible for protecting and providing for their babies and family. Thus, unconscious decisions by both sexes are made to meet these needs when deciding on whether or not to go on a first date. When we think of women’s needs in this context it becomes easier to figure out what they unconsciously want.

Prove Your Masculinity

Think about this. If a man is unable to ask a girl out, show his sexual interest, and prove his masculinity, why would she have the slightest interest in him? The sooner that you realize  the needs of women are completely different from their own, the sooner you’ll be successful in dating them.

What many men fail to realize is that their physical attractiveness is not very important to women. “What?” This is often a hard concept for men to grasp, but it’s true. As people we try to relate to situations using our own personal experiences.

Relate To Women And Understand Their Needs

Because men are primarily attracted to a woman’s physical beauty, they make the mistake of assuming that she is also attracted by physical beauty. To further demonstrate this point, let’s what women thought was most ‘physically’ attractive. To find out these results I asked many women during my travels of becoming more successful when trying to meet women.

Here are the results:

1. Sexy, small butt
2. Slimness
3. Flat Stomach

Of course physical beauty can influence a woman’s decision, but it’s not the deciding factor.

Do Not Misinterpret A Woman’s Desire For Physicality

Men often sit with groups of women and watch them point out great looking guys, giggle, and express desire for these men. Sadly, men misinterpret this as first-hand evidence that women value a man’s appearance above all else.

While witnessing these situations, most guys miss out on a vital piece of information – a man’s physical beauty will get him only so far. When a man introduces himself to a woman, but doesn’t possess the most important qualities a woman is looking for, any interest she may have in his physical beauty becomes irrelevant.

Now do you see why focusing only on your physical “look” is not very productive?

And of course, you may be asking yourself, “But don’t women say they like funny, entertaining and helpful guys?” The main reason most men are confused about what women want is because most women don’t know what they want.

Understand The Two Levels Of The Human Mind

To explain this further, let’s talk about the two levels of the human mind: unconscious and conscious. On a conscious level, women love funny, caring and sweet guys. But on an unconscious and purely instinctive level, they desire men that confidently pursue them without the fear of rejection.

The reason a woman may find it difficult to leave an arrogant and selfish boyfriend is because she’s magnetically attracted to him. This guy may not be “nice” but he’ll greatly benefit her children by passing on his confidence, leadership, and decision-making skills. And her unconscious brain reminds her of that.

Everything comes back to reproduction. If you possess the right masculine qualities (you’ll learn about them very shortly), you can still have the sweet, caring, and romantic, more feminine qualities. In fact, having the perfect blend of the two – masculine and feminine – will help you to keep any woman you want.

Displaying confidence is essential in making a good first impression on a woman, in the same way that physical attractiveness stirs a man’s interest. Confident men take action, control situations and show no fear. Once we finish talking about these fundamentals, you’ll learn how to communicate and flirt with women in a way that naturally attracts them by projecting these qualities.

Being Attractive is Not All That

Let’s face it, in online dating, being attractive is cheap. Why? Because you have a photo and a bunch of text describing yourself, and people judge you based on that. Or rather, they form an impression inside their head based on what they see. Now, we all know that you’re not going to put up a photo that  doesn’t look good, right? Exactly.

The thing is, no matter how closely you resemble your photo, you will still  look slightly different offline. She will either notice this or she will ignore it completely. Here’s why. How attractive you are to the girl you’re meeting up with is going to depend on how much attraction you create. Don’t worry so much about your online dating picture when you ask a girl out.

Be Confident

Don’t use gimmicks when you meet the girl for the first time, use your own confidence. Get a list of pick up lines right now and you’ll see some that are so re-hashed that you KNOW girls have heard them all before. But you know what? Some guys still make these lines work for them. In fact, some guys can simply say  “hello” and they get the women’s attention.

It’s not what you say, but how you  say it. Confidence shows in the way you walk, the tone of voice you use and taking  control of the situation. In other words, instead of letting her decide where you’re  going to go, take control and you make the plans.

Use Humor

Women love funny men. Be funny, make jokes. When I’m with a girl, I always like to people watch. Women love doing this and you can always people watch and make funny comments about what other  people are wearing, how they’re walking or their voices and stuff like that, just between you two.

Remember to keep it light, so that she knows you’re kidding. And most important of all, don’t get all piqued when she turns the tables on you and puts  you at the receiving end of a joke. The best part of being funny is you draw out the funny side of the girl. When you’re laughing together, acting silly and exchanging pokes, you can bet she can feel the connection (and the attraction  for you).

Personality

One thing about a guy that will make a woman turn her head regardless of  how he looks is his personality. And “personality” has something to do with the way you set yourself apart from other men. Most dating tips will tell you to be yourself. This is a staple for a reason. When women finds a man who has a  great personality, they usually say he’s down-to-earth and easy to talk to.

What does these mean? Being down-to-earth simply means you’re not walking on eggshells around her, you’re not making her feel awkward by being awkward, and you’re not asking a question that could put her on edge. You can look her in the eye  and tell her you like her without making it seem like you’re desperate to have her to like you back.

Be a Challenge

Another thing to avoid is kissing her ass. I hate to say it, but women throw out tests. You’ve got to have confidence and bust on them with the fear of rejection. That’s the perfect time to tease a woman. If a woman says, “Do these pants make my ass look  big,” I might turn around and look and say, “Wow, really big. Whoa,” and smile because she knows you’re not being serious.

On the Internet, I might throw out something like, “Listen, I understand you’re not really attractive, guys can’t stand looking at you, they’re completely repulsed  by looking at you, you’re not intelligent and you can’t carry on a conversation, so why are you on the Internet?” I’ll say it in a bit of a humorous way. It’s great because they know that I’m teasing them and I’m not kissing their ass.

Use Sexual Evolution To Your Advantage

Have you ever wondered why men and women choose their particular partners? Women “say” they want men who are sweet, generous and caring – but rarely do they date this type of man.

Women stereotypically date football players, arrogant jerks and the “rebel without a cause” type. But to explain why this is so, we must first understand our instincts and how they influence our sex drive. After we understand that, everything else becomes clear.

Since the beginning of time men and women have carried out unique and completely different roles within their communities. In many primate species, 20 percent of the males mate with 80 percent of the females to make sure that the strongest genes survive. These male monkeys are also known as alpha males.

Survival Of The Fittest

This principle guarantees that only the strongest males pass on their superior genes, guaranteeing that the species continues to prosper, and to develop stronger and healthier offspring. This is why Mother Nature favors strong males, and is the reason “the hungry don’t get fed.”

So wouldn’t it be logical that you would want to display the attributes women are looking for in order to convince them that you would benefit their offspring?

A woman won’t find a man desirable because he wears nice clothes or has good looks. How would a well-dressed, handsome man benefit their offspring? When you think about it, attraction is a process that tricks a man and a woman into liking each other long enough for them to have sex.

Use Historical Perspectives

Back in primitive times the basic roles of men and women were as follows:

• Men did the hunting, protecting and providing
• Women did the nurturing, caring and raising of children

If men were the providers, and women were the child bearers, what differences would you expect of them?

Being the protectors, providers and hunters, men needed bigger bodies that were capable of quick bursts of energy to help them catch their prey, build shelters and protect their families from predators.

Being the nurturers and caretakers, women needed broader hips, breasts to feed their young, and slightly higher fat stores in their bodies to ensure their unborn children could survive harsh environments.

Mother Nature (or God, or however you view how life began) created men and women to be biologically and physically different and this helped to make them instinctively desire each other, and ultimately grow the population. Knowing these differences can help you become an alpha male that naturally attracts women.

The typical customer, like the average guy in a bar trying to talk to an attractive woman, broadcasts his interest right away. Right up front, he makes it obvious that he’s into her.

What You Don’t Want To Do

• Tell the stripper how beautiful/hot/sexy she is.
• Use the right body language.
• Ask her predictable questions (“So how long have you worked here?” “How are you tonight?” “So where are you from, originally?”, etc.) No guy asks these questions unless he’s interested, right?
• Offer to buy a dance or a drink right away.
• Ask  her if she has a boyfriend (this question is pointless; if she does, she’ll never admit it because it would spoil the fantasy. Plus, it’s another indicator that you’re interested).
• Maintain eye contact throughout the conversation.
• Put your hands on her.

Use The Power Conversation

This means that everything you say, and every question you ask, should have a purpose behind it. I also want to stress the importance of going into these conversations with the right attitude. The most powerful way to separate yourself in her mind from all the other customers is to take the attitude that she must impress you. You are the one conducting the “interview.”

Your vibe should be congruent with this attitude. There are plenty of beautiful women in this place, and you’re somebody in here; you want to make her feel she needs to prove she is special if you’re going to grant her your time, get to know her, and buy her a drink. If you do this correctly, you should easily be able to get a first date.

So right from the beginning, I’ll start using Qualifying Questions and Statements to turn the tables. I’m sending the message that I’m curious to know more about her, because she’s someone I might be interested, but just as I’m not a typical customer. I’m not interested in “typical strippers.” She’ll need to show to me that she’s more than a pair of boobs with no brain.

Things You DO Want To Do

• Try to get an authentic response from her. Every woman has (or likes to believe she has) something special about her that most guys would never guess. If she deflects this move, or tries to make a joke out of it, probe a bit deeper.
• Tell her, “seriously, Melissa, I get the sense that you’re a pretty deep, interesting person. Guys make all kinds of assumptions about dancers, but I bet you’re a completely different person outside of this club. Am I right?”
• Act confident and enthusiastic about the details she shares with you. If you’ve got things in common, point it out, and prompt her to keep sharing.
• Control the flow. Keep moving it forward. Don’t get stuck on one topic and wind up searching for things to say, to fill dead space. Move on to something totally unrelated and keep things interesting.

1. Not Thinking About Style The Way Women Do

A lot of guys think that they are in-style because they are wearing something that their guy friends think is cool.  The truth is that most women do not have the same taste as your guy friends. For example, here’s a few things you should NEVER wear on a first date, or basically ever.

Affliction or Ed Hardy-style clothing (anything with dragons or skulls screams “douchebag” to a woman), athletic jerseys (unless you are actually AT the game), any type of MMA clothing (Hit Man Fight Gear, Tap Out, etc.), excessive jewelry (keep it to your watch and maybe ONE other tasteful piece), Tevas or, God forbid, Crocs. Wearing any one of these things will kill your chances with a fashion-conscious woman, which is what nearly all “10′s” are.

2. Not Making A Move

Listen up! As a man, it’s YOUR JOB to make the first move to get physical – and if you don’t – you will end up in the friend zone, for sure. And here’s something else you need to know: A woman would much rather you take the chance and go for a kiss at the wrong time then have you not go for it at all!

With that in mind though, the best time to go for a kiss is NOT necessarily at the end of a date.In fact, that’s often a BAD time for a couple reasons: It’s a “high pressure” moment, and all of that build-up can make things awkward If you start kissing her earlier in the night – the two of you can be kissing the entire time – not just once at the end! So when you are planning your date, think about a good way you could start kissing part-way through.

This is why I love taking girls out for a drink at intimate wine bars or cocktail lounges instead of restaurants. Find a place where the 2 of you are sitting close to each other, and when conversation is going great, lean in and go for it! You’ll be surprised at just how much more willing a girl is to kiss you in the middle of the date during some great conversation versus waiting until that awkward moment at the end like most guys do.

Bonus Tip:

As a good way did get things started, break up the conversation with a sincere compliment, then go for it. For example, after she finishing talking, say, “Wow, you look gorgeous right now” and maintain eye contact. Then lean in to kiss her. If she gives you the cheek, that’s totally fine… it’s all part of the game. You see, most 10′s aren’t gonna kiss a guy the first time he tries! (They don’t want to feel too easy.)

Don’t be afraid of rejection. If you get “the cheek”, go ahead and kiss her on the cheek, then pull back and keep the convo going strong like nothing happened. Then, give it another shot a little bit later. You’ll be surprised at how often you start kissing passionately on the 2nd try!

3. Not Taking Action

This is perhaps the BIGGEST mistake guys make when it comes to women and dating is not taking action to get that part of their lives handled. I know, because I used to be absolutely TERRIBLE with women. I was a virgin until I was 24 years old. You want to be an alpha male.

For a while there, I just accepted that as my fate, and figured things would always be that way. But then a few years ago, I made the decision to figure this stuff out once and for all. It took me a long time before I started dating the 10′s. I started by dating 3′s and 4′s! I then worked my way up to hotter girls. And it was then I found that the HOTTEST girls were totally different than all the rest.

And after a few more years of trial and error, I figured out how to land those ultra-hot model girls as well. I’m still just a regular dude. I live in 2 bedroom apartment that I share with a friend, I drive a 6 year old car, and I’m no Colin Farrell when it comes to my looks.  But these days, I’m able to get most any girl I want – and do it without rejection, and without wasting a lot of money or time. The difference is, I TOOK ACTION!

Talking to a girl you find attractive can be intimidating. Maintaining eye contact through your intimidation is vital to keeping her interest in you as a potential date. Here are a couple of dating tips as to why you should maintain eye contact throughout each date.

Earn Her Trust

Trust can be a big issue with women when they are with a guy that is constantly looking all over the room. There is nothing more obvious than a guy who will not look you in the eyes when you are talking to him. In order for the girl to gain your trust look her in the eye whenever she is asking you a question or whenever you are delivering an answer. If you do not look her in the eye as she is asking you a question she will probably think that you’re not listening.

If she thinks that you are not listening then you are not going to get a second date. If you do not look her in the eye as you ask a question, she might pick up on your nervousness and brush you off as insecure, ruining your first date. Looking her in the eye is one of the best dating tips that you can get.

Do Not Stare At Her

Just because we say that you should look her in the eye does not mean you should stare down your date at a serial killer. When she’s asking you a question you want to look her in the eye, however, the last thing you want to do is focus too much on your eye contact and forget to actually listen to what she’s saying. Listen to what she’s saying and have animation in your face while she’s telling you her story or about how her day was. If she’s telling you something funny be sure and give her a smile, but don’t break the eye contact.

Don’t Look Down

Looking down as one of the telltale signs that you are either not interested in her or you are too insecure to look her in the eye whenever she is talking. One of the hardest things to do is to keep from looking down if you run into an awkward spot in the conversation. All singles hit a couple of speed bumps along the way, but you should maintain eye contact instead of looking down and leaving her hanging.

While she is telling you a story, take mental notes so you can refer back to the information and ask more questions about the topic. If you are having dinner with her, it’s only natural to look down at your plate and your food but do this in a natural manner instead of in a reactive manner when the conversation goes silent.

Use Your Eye Language

Yes, there is a language that you can speak with your eyes. Your eyes are going to tell your date what you think about her. While you can lie with your words, your eyes and your facial expressions can often be deciphered by any date. Before you go out on your dates stand in front of a mirror and have a quick conversation with yourself.

Ask yourself what you did today and then answer the question with a  lie. You should be able to notice lines across your forehead and that your eyes open a little more. Now recall a funny situation that you were in and laugh. Take notice of your eyes as you laugh and you should be able to see the difference.

The language that your eyes speak whenever you are lying is very distinctive. Have confidence in yourself and make sure that you are not lying to your dates or they will notice via your eye language. Also make sure that you’re not over-animating whenever you think something that is funny.

The only problem is you went out a few times and now he’s not calling you back.  You can’t believe it.  You thought there was just this incredible chemistry.  You’re thinking, “What did I do wrong?” Here’s the deal.What you’re ‘doing wrong’ right now is you’re obsessing.

Whenever you sit around and you obsess about a man not calling you back, basically what you’re doing is you’re telling the universe that you’re not worthy of a great man. You’re driving your friends up the wall when you do that.  They don’t want to hear it anymore.  They don’t know why he hasn’t called you back.

They have no clue at all why this man has not called you back.  You go through this ridiculous session with them saying, “Do you think I said this wrong or that wrong?” And you obsess about it. You actually get them to give you their opinion on why he hasn’t called back, but your friends don’t know anything about him.

So how do you get him to call you back?

1. Stop Obsessing And Call Yourself

When he answers the phone, don’t mention that he never called you and don’t be rude or accusatory. Be sweet and flirt when he answers the phone. If he doesn’t answer the phone, leave him a tantalizing little message.  “Hey, been thinking about you.  How are you? Where did you disappear off to?”  That’s it.

2. Text The Guy

If you’re too afraid, then you can send a text. It’s the exact same thing. “Hey, you.  Where did you disappear to?  Did aliens abduct you?”  It’s about just being fun and it’s about being clever.

3. Forget About The Guy

If you haven’t heard back in a few days after a great date and he doesn’t return your texts, then you’re obsessing.  And if you obsess for way too long, you’re going to turn the energy off for meeting other singles. You’re giving your power away to a guy that doesn’t deserve the the gift of who you are.

I don’t care if you think you had great chemistry. Dating isn’t just about chemistry.  It’s not one thing you said or another thing.  You know what it is?  It just didn’t work out.  He made a choice not to pursue it anymore and you need to be okay with that.

You’re a beautiful, incredible, amazing woman and you deserve better. Open up your eyes and go meet another guy. If you’re obsessed with a guy, your eyes aren’t open, and you’ll miss the next great guy who is right around the corner because you’re too busy thinking about a guy that doesn’t deserve your attention.

Love yourself.

What’s Your Criteria?

There are a couple of different searches you want to do when online dating. The first thing you want to do is set up a search based on your criteria. For instance, if I’m only looking for girls who are 25 to 35, I’ll put that in my criteria. I’ll be as picky as I want and then I’m just going to save those searches so I can keep  going back to them over and over again every week in search of singles.

Keyword Search

If you’re into certain sports or hobbies and you want somebody who shares that interest, you can search by keyword. On Match.com you can pull up all the women in your area who have that keyword in their profiles. Using this method to meet women is a great way to find the ones that you will have something in common with quickly.

Hit On The Newbies

Do you remember when you were new and you’ve just received a bunch of emails? You’re stoked. You’re excited. You email back ASAP. The women who  join the site are the same. You search “New” members because you want to hit these women fast before a lot of other guys get a chance to e-mail them.  Think about it. If you’re the 800th guy that has e-mailed her, then odds are  she’s probably not going to read your e-mail because she has 799 e-mails in front of you. You have to strike fast if you want a first date. You have to e-mail the “New” members quickly.

Search By Activity Date

A lot of guys don’t do this, but this is one of the most effective ways to ask a girl out. The reason why is because you get to see the women who are actively looking for dates. The women who frequently do searches or browse profiles are hot leads. In a sales background, that’s like somebody coming in to your store or calling up your business and telling you they want to do business
with you.

Hot Leads

The best search that you can do, the one that’s going to get you the highest quality women who are interested is what I call “hot leads.” These are the women who have searched your profile. On Match.com and PlentyOfFish.com, you can actually go into the site and check who has searched you. You want to e-mail these women because these are the women who have checked you out and sometimes they have e-mailed you.

Make Eye Contact With Here First

Make eye contact with her before she starts to come over to your table. Give her a smile and a nod. As soon as she sees this she will start to come over to you. If she’s dancing onstage when you notice her, you can make eye contact and give her a subtle hand wave to indicate you want her to come join you when she gets offstage. Normally, dancers will alternate between sitting with customers and dancing onstage for a few songs.

Offer Her A Seat At Your Table

When she comes over to you, offer her a seat at your table. Do this before she tries to sit down on your lap. It’s always important for you to separate yourself, in her mind, from the endless parade of regular customers she encounters at the club. The other guys love the opportunity to get her on their laps, and start putting their hands on her.

A suave guy gives the impression that he already gets all the attention he can handle from females; he certainly doesn’t need to visit a strip club in order to get his hands on a woman. He knows that when he starts flirting with a woman she will be his.

Control The Conversational Flow

From this point, your goal is to control the flow of the conversation. Just as you’re not going to allow her to go into her routine, and start asking you questions, you’re not going to follow the typical customer routine and ask her stupid questions.

Listen to the average customer trying to “converse” with a stripper, and you’ll probably hear him ask her questions like these:

•    “So how long have you danced here?”

•    “Do you enjoy working here?”

•    “What’s it like working here?”

•    “Do your family/friends know you work here?”

She Won’t Date A Customer

Skip this pointless small talk and start talking about things that are completely unrelated to her work. This is a powerful way to frame yourself as an original, confident guy, rather than as a customer.

Remember, dancers don’t bang “customers.”

They all have a hang-up about this: dating a customer, in their eyes of their co-workers and management, could be interpreted as prostitution (or just plain slutty behavior). You want her to view you as a cool, confident guy who does none of the things that customers do, and therefore she sees you as a romantic/sexual option. You want to be an alpha male who is going to get her attention quickly.

Go On A “Mini-Date”

Earlier, I mentioned how the best place to sit is near a speaker. This is because it  gives you a reason to tell her, “let’s move somewhere quieter, I want to be able to hear you.”

This shows you value what she has to say, and gives it the feel like a  “mini date:” you’re controlling the flow and taking her somewhere else to have this interaction, even if it’s just to the other side of the room.

If, when you get up to move locations, she suggests a trip to the VIP room (where the dances are way more expensive), use this joke: “No thanks, I’m too tired to dance for you tonight.” Then take her hand and lead her over to a more secluded seating area.

Take Action And Make It Happen

Macks are leaders with confidence. Macks take control of the flow and the tempo all conversations. One way to establish this early on is to take her by the hand, and bring her over to a quieter location.

As a Mack, you’ll take an “under the radar” approach that never shows your interest in her. You give her the impression that you’re a guy with high standards who is difficult to impress, but you think she might be a pretty cool chick, so you’re willing to talk to her and get to know her.

The problem with online dating lies with the first meeting. Meeting an online date can be awkward and disastrous when not handled properly. However, there are a few things that you can do to make your date go smoothly. Here are a couple of tips to making your first meeting with an online date go well.

Be Specific With The First Date

It’s all too easy to send out a message to get together while missing out on key details for the first date. The last thing that you want to do is show up for the date wearing something inappropriate for the occasion. Whether you’re going out to a nice dinner or just grabbing a drink, make sure that you know exactly what the date is going to entail beforehand.

This can help you avoid the awkward feeling of showing up wearing jeans and a T-shirt when a girl is expecting an elegant night on the town. Be specific whenever you message a potential date to let them know what you intend on doing.

Get REAL Pictures Of Her

Getting pictures of your date is essential to making sure that you are physically attracted to her. Although physical attraction is not everything in dating, physical attraction is important for every relationship. Online dating sites are notorious for having a crop feature. Cropping allows women and men to center the picture on their face. While they might have a pretty face, not being aware of what their body looks like can easily lead to a frustrating and awkward first date.

Make sure that you get pictures of your date and that you are posting pictures of yourself through your own online dating profile. It is never recommended to be deceptive or online dating. If there is anything suspicious about the girl’s profile make sure that you cover all of your bases before you meet her. Meeting a girl that you are not physically attracted to will not lead to a relationship.

Ask The Important Questions

One of the easiest tactics for having online dating success is to ask questions during the initial date. Not only will this allow you to gain further knowledge of the girl, it will also make the time go by faster. Have a few questions in mind before you go on the date so that if the conversation lulls you will be able to easily steer it back without complication. Asking her about her job, education, where she grew up, favorite music and movies are some fairly good staples of first dates.

Getting her to talk about her passions in life will easily help you avoid any awkward moments. Avoid trying to sound like you’re giving her a job interview. No woman wants to be hounded during a first date. Keep it casual and the first date could lead to a second.

Don’t Get Physical Unless Called For

Physicality is important for every relationship. It bridges the gap between friendship and a significant other, but this doesn’t mean you should instantly have sex with her during the first date. If there is clearly chemistry and you feel like you should get physical with her, or that she wants you to, then by all means go ahead. However, trying to go in for the first kiss is usually not recommended as it could lead to a very awkward moment if she turns you down.

Wait at least until the second or third day before you try to kiss her. The reality is that she may not even want to go back out with you. End the date with a hug and skip the kiss. If you get the handshake, you’re probably not going to get a second date.

Don’t Be Awkward During The Date

One of the best tips that anybody can give you is to simply not be awkward. While this may seem like an all too obvious piece of advice, there are ways that you can avoid awkward moments through body language. Smiling as you meet her and maintaining eye contact throughout the date can easily avoid any awkward moments throughout.

If you’re constantly looking away from her, checking the score on the TV behind her or allowing the conversation to dive into awkwardness then you’re asking for trouble. Maintain eye contact throughout the date, smile when she tells you something mildly funny and pretend that you’re having a great time even if you’re not. While this might be a little deceptive, it can get you through the evening and out the door before you know it.

Your message box is where you’ll be spending most of your time in a dating site because once your profile is set up, all you’re going to be doing is searching for women, e-mailing them and replying to women’s emails.

A lot of guys can’t bridge the gap between talking and writing letters. They try to do things like they do in real life, but unfortunately that doesn’t translate well to the Internet. As a result, they don’t get replies from women and they quit.

Here’s how I was when I started:

I would read these women’s profiles and I thought that every e-mail I would send out was really unique and funny and interesting and everything that I thought she was looking for based on reading her profile. I would spend 15 to 20 minutes on each e-mail and I would send out dozens of these and dozens more.

I would spend hours and hours sending out e-mails thinking I’m going to get a ton of response. Unfortunately, no e-mails came. If you’ve ever been on a dating site and sent off e-mails, this has probably happened to you. It doesn’t take a genius to realize that when you don’t get a response to your e-mail it’s a long way from getting a date and further away than that from having sex with a woman.

Don’t quit. I didn’t, and the patience paid off.

1. Copy The Best

I didn’t know what kind of e-mails I should write that women would respond to. What happened was I would write these long e-mails that would take 15 minutes to write. It would contain all these great things about her online dating profile that I really liked, and what things we have in common. The problem was I would never hear back from these women.

Let’s say you have an account in one of the sites and you got several e-mails coming in from guys who were interested in this woman. You can shut the profile off after a day or two and read through everything that the account received.

Here’s what I do. I would look at the e-mails, take the best ones, tweak them for myself and then send them out. I call this system “Copy the Best,” for obvious reasons. One thing that’s great about this technique is you know what your competition is doing, how they land dates, and how they write good emails.

Of course, it wouldn’t do to just copy. Inject your personality in these emails. It’s the same as writing your own, but now you have some good “email templates” you can use.

2. Watch Your Subject Line

Your subject line is important, obviously, because if you don’t want your mail buried in those 30 to 100 e-mails she has received that day. If you’ve spent a lot of time creating your email, you don’t want it deleted or thrown in an archive unopened. Your subject line plays a crucial role when sending a message to a girl who doesn’t know you yet.

Here are some suggestions on how to write a subject line that gets her curious enough to open your mail:

• No generic greetings. Whatever you do, never put a generic greeting like “hello” or “hi” on the subject line. What I’ve discovered is that 80% to 90% of the time men send out emails that have “Hi!” or “Hello” as subject lines. To a woman, one message that has this as a subject is like all the rest of the emails she received the past week.
• Use a cliffhanger. You could say something like, “Hey, I read your profile but….” which will instantly get her thinking “but what?” The element of doubt at the end of the subject line will get her clicking to find out what you mean with “but.”
• Use subjects that the dating site sends you. You’re going to notice that every dating site that you sign up to will have their own e-mails they send you. You know what these are – “you have mail,” or “your newest match.” One of my favorite subject lines is, “This member might be interested in you…” That subject line right there is one of the best ever, especially if you get a woman who checks you out or winks at you.
• Include her name. Look at her profile and figure out if she’s using her first name or an alias. If she uses her name in the profile, you can definitely use that in the subject line.
• Use “Re:” What this does is creates curiosity like they might have already e-mailed or spoken to you. Remember, because they’re getting e-mailed so many times per day, they might not even remember if they did or didn’t.
• If she sent you a wink and you want to e-mail her back, you can use a subject line that says “this member is also interested in you.” Or, you can say “thanks for the wink. I’m looking forward to your e-mail.”

3. Take Note of Patterns

What you do next is set up different two different e-mails, maybe you have one of your own, maybe you have an idea for something you think is going to work. So take two of them and start sending out mail to the different women.

Divide it up. If you send out 20 emails, send 10 from one address and 10 from the other.

What you’ll discover is one of these is going to get more responses than the other. Once you have the “winner” (basically the email address that gets more replies), start carpet bombing the whole site because then you have an e-mail that produces great results.

There’s another thing that happens when you use only one email. You’re going to burn through your list of “possible dates” (meaning, these girls live nearby and there’s a big chance that you can meet ASAP) if you send mail from only one address. This means if the girl did not reply, or she deleted your first mail, you’re not going to get a chance to e-mail again.

So, use separate emails and test them out.

4. The Best Day To Send Emails

If there’s a “good time to call,” there’s also a “good time to send emails.” I kept track of the emails that got the best responses, and guess what? There are three days in a week that worked better for sending out e-mails. Those three days are Friday, Saturday and Sunday.

Why Friday, Saturday and Sunday?

Friday in the late afternoon, anywhere from 2:00 to 5:00 pm is an ideal window for you to send out your e-mails. This day, for a lot of people, is just a slack. Maybe some industries aren’t that busy and maybe some people just slack off in the later part of the day. On this day, a lot of women will be on the Internet checking their emails, just basically waiting until they get out of there so they can go home.

Send out your mail on a Saturday morning from about 10:00 am to 1:00 pm.

These girls go out on Friday night and they’re looking to meet somebody but most of the time, they don’t. The guys they want to meet don’t go up and approach them. If they do, it’s using some corny pick-up line that just doesn’t work. The frustrated women wake up on a Saturday and check their e-mails like normal people do on a Saturday morning and poof! There’s your e-mail.

For the same reason, Sunday morning to mid-afternoon from 10:00 am to 2:00 pm is ideal for sending out emails. Let’s suppose these ladies went out on Saturday night and didn’t meet anyone. That’s two days in a row and you can bet they’re feeling a bit more frustrated. Finding your email at that point would be most welcome!

1. Asking A Girl Out

What The Idiot Would Say

“You are really beautiful – I’ve love to take you out sometime.”

What The Champ Would Say

“You seem like you might be a lot of fun. We should grab a drink sometime.”

See the difference??

The idiot is letting her know that he is SOLD on her. He already thinks she’s beautiful, and then, by asking her out, it makes it look like she would be doing him a favor if she said yes!

Not good.

But the champ, well he hasn’t quite made up his mind yet. He says she seems like she MIGHT be fun and wants to grab a drink with her to find out.

This laid back, low pressure approach is one of the best dating tips out there. It not only lets a woman know that it’s gonna take more than her looks to impress you, but also that you’re not quite sold on her. Which in turn will make her much more likely to want to hang out with you so she can CONVINCE you that she is fun!

Get it?

2. Talking On The Phone

In these days where everyone is text messaging, I’ve found it very effective to call a girl on the phone and have a great conversation with her.

There are plenty of tricks for making phone convos great, but for now, let’s just talk about a little thing champs do at the end of a call that idiots don’t.

They hang up!

I don’t mean literally hanging up a girl. But a lot of stupid guys will keep on talking to a girl until SHE has to go.

But a champ will always end the call first, showing that he has a life and is a busy guy with things to do.

Most importantly, it leaves her wanting MORE.

What An Idiot Would Say

“Well, it was good talking to you. I’ll give you a call this weekend and we’ll see what’s going on.”

What A Champ Would Say

“Well it was good talking to you. I’ll talk to you later.”

See the difference?

These are one of the more subtle dating tips, but it’s really HUGE.

You in the first example, when you end a phone call with, “I’ll call you this weekend” you are saying two things:

• That you are interested in her, and want to talk to her again to make plans
• That YOU are going to be the one to call to initiate these plans

But by saying these two things, you are creating two problems:

You are showing too much interest! What kind of challenge does it create if she KNOWS you are going to call her that weekend to make plans? The answer: None!

By telling her you are going to call her, you are essentially rendering her UNABLE to call YOU!

You see, since you said YOU’D be calling, now if she calls you she’ll feel like she looks desperate.

On the other hand, if you end the conversation with a simple, “talk to you later,” then she is free to call you as she wishes, and you are also free to call her as you wish.

Perhaps best of all, this removes the PREDICTABILITY from the situation – as if you tell her you’re going to call that weekend, then she knows you’re going to and it’s not a fun surprise.

3. At The End Of A Date

Here’s another similar example, this time at the end of a first date.

What The Idiot Would Say

“We should do this again some time. How about this weekend?”

What A Champ Would Say

Nothing!

He’d wish her a good night, but make no mention of hanging out again, leaving her wondering if he was interested.

Now, let’s talk about the psychology of this one for a second. You see, a girl is so used a guy going for Date #2 at the end of Date #1 that when a guy leaves it open, she doesn’t know what to think!

Her first instinct is to worry that he didn’t have a good time, and isn’t interested in a second date! She’ll often worry about it for DAYS afterwards.

Then, when you DO call to ask her out again, she is so RELIEVED that she automatically says “YES!” and is super excited to see you again!

4. During A Date

Now let’s talk about DURING a date.

What An Idiot Would Say

Well, a dumb guy might say a bunch of things. A bunch of things about himself, maybe that aren’t true, in an attempt to impress the girl.

He might talk about his car, his job, or his exotic vacations. Or he might “name drop” or make things up in order to sound cooler than he really is. And let me tell you – NOTHING turns a girl off faster than a guy who is trying too hard to impress her.

Remember, attractive women have seen IT ALL. And when a guy brags and boasts, even if he does it in a subtle way, a woman sees this an INSECURITY. Worst of all, this lets her know that SHE is in control.

Think about it – if you’re trying to impress her, that tells her that you are already sold on her! Challenge over!

What A Champ Would Say

“So tell me about you. What’s your story?”

Then, he will ask questions to size HER up.

He might ask her what she wants to do with her life, the coolest place she’s ever been to in the world, where her dream vacation would be, and what she wants to do before she dies.

Not “job interview” style, but definitely a PERSONALITY INTERVIEW. A champ sets it up so HE is the “selector,” not her. And he needs to know that a woman has a good personality if he’s going to date her – her looks aren’t enough.

So he’s not afraid to ask questions that help him find out more about what’s going on with a woman below the surface. Women RESPECT that. A lot.

There is nothing a woman loves to talk about more than her dreams, hopes and desires, so not only does this set you up as the “selector” and as a challenge, it also makes for a really fun date!

1. Two Ways To Get Started

You can do this one of two ways – try to get two women to experiment that you met that night – OR get your regular girlfriend in on it.

2. Keep Your Game Tight

As for the two new women you just met – it could happen, but your game has to be TIGHT. If you get them a little drunk and playful, that helps. Just don’t let them keep playing with each other unless you’re involved. You want to be telling them what to do and asserting your dominance over them in a playful way.

If they’re REALLY into it, and you know they’re not going to have some freak-out because they’re leaving the bar, you need to get them home. I don’t suggest even trying to get her out of the club until after 1:00AM or so. If she feels like she’s ‘missing something’ at the bar, or with her friends, she won’t go.

3. Invent An “After-Party” At Your Place

You need a reason to get them to your place (or even one of theirs) that doesn’t “break her state of mind.” And you don’t want to make it obvious that this is why you’re leaving – to have a threesome. The reason needs to be MORE FUN.

You’ve got booze, you’ve got music, you’ve got a big couch with pillows, and you’ve got something they all have to see. Maybe it’s a huge lava lamp. Maybe it’s a movie where you were an extra. Maybe it’s your pictures from Australia. Just have something mega-cool to go see. This is the excuse they need.

Don’t ask them, either. TELL THEM. And start by telling one chick that the OTHER chick wants to go, and vice-versa. “Donna says she wants to go have some more fun, because this place is starting to get lame. C’mon.”

4. Have Your House Ready First

When you get them to your house, you make sure the lights are down, that funky light is on, the music goes on, and the drinks come out right away. I’m not going into how to setup your house here, bro, but you need to have all the clocks hidden, and the house neat and smelling good. This is stuff you should know by now.

5. Play A Game

You need to get them back to the same flirtatious feelings you were having in the bar, so I always pull out a game or something to mess with. I’ve got cards, dominoes, a Ouija board, dice, all in one drawer.

6. How To Get Your Girlfriend In On It

If you get your regular girlfriend in on it, make sure you’ve talked about her past and if she’s had one before. If NEITHER of you has had a threesome, you got something to discuss. She’ll get jealous, and you’re going to have a weird time. Get it straight FIRST. Then the rest will be easy for you. Just let her take the lead.

7. Introduce Erotic Massage

Start with a “massage circle” where everyone massages in a line, you in the middle. Then get them to massage on each other. From there it’s EASY to get them to start doing an erotic massage on each other.

8. Use The “Kiss Test”

Do the “kiss test” where you kiss one of the chicks and pull away. You say: “Hmm. Not bad. Let me try her…” Then you kiss the other chick. After that, you say: “Not bad, either. Here, you try her.” Then you gently pull the first girl over to the girl you just kissed and let them go at it.

9. Let It Roll

Once they get started, everything takes care of itself. Just make sure you start in the right place so you don’t have to move from the kitchen to the bedroom, or the hallway to the bedroom.

10. Don’t Push Them Too Far Too Fast

A threesome should happen at the girl’s pace. If you start seeing one of the women getting weird (you’ll see it in her eyes, where she looks, how much she’s looking down, etc.) you need to go back to making her comfortable and loosened up. She has to feel safe and protected in this zone. Which means you have to be willing to back off BEFORE she starts to put the brakes on for you.

This is important! If you miss these moments when a woman is getting all weird, and SHE ends up stopping you, then you probably will never get it back to where it was before.

If you focus on their enjoyment and make it about them, you can score the threesome. If it’s only about you, you’ll scare them off.

Strippers will often give you phony signals in order to make you think they’re into you. This is how they make their money and play their game! Most guys fall for it, because mentally, they think they’re in a regular bar and the same rules apply. This is a huge mistake – and it will likely cost you quite a bit of money if you end up falling for it.

The strip club is a different universe. It’s not a bar, where women are vulnerable and show their “real selves” to guys there. The woman you see on stage isn’t who she really is – almost all strippers wear a “mask.” They have a different persona when they’re in the club than they have in real life. You’ve got to be able to recognize the false signals, and build the connection so that she begins to give you real signals of interest.

How To Tell She’s Faking It:

• She walks over and starts touching you immediately: running her fingernails along your shoulder, neck, or arm, or sitting down on your lap.
• She leads off with generic questions. “What’s your name?” “Are you having a good time?” etc.
• Laughing at practically everything you say, as if she thinks you’re the most clever man alive (and you’re not really saying anything that clever)
• She “confesses” her real name to you, without you prompting her to do so. (She’s probably still telling you a phony name.)
• Batting her eyelashes and looking straight into your eyes
• Gently squeezing her breasts together, between her elbows, while she looks at you
• Telling you that you’re cute/sexy/handsome/hot
• Complimenting you on your shoes or your watch. (Experienced strippers notice these two aspects of a man’s appearance; it’s a quick way to gauge how much money he’s got.)
• Bending forward so you can check out her breasts
• Rubbing her body as she flirts with you
• Telling you she’s “drunk,” or “horny”
• Rubbing your chest or your crotch within minutes of meeting you

The typical customer, mesmerized by her hotness, will mistake these “stripper tricks” as indicators that she’s genuinely into him. This compels him to start shelling out money.

Don’t take the bait. Ignore it. If she starts rubbing on you, move her hand away and tell her, “Whoa…I’m not that easy. Can’t you at least buy me dinner first?”

Again, you’re behaving in the opposite manner of the previous 437 fools who came in her strip club and bought into her “sales pitch.” Your job is to deflect the pitch, break her out of her routine, and control the interaction.

An alpha male is something that a lot of guys strive to be, but ultimately fail at. Being this kind of guy can lead to a lot of dates and respect from co-workers. It’s important to remember that being an alpha male can easily bleed from your dating life into your work life. Standing up for yourself and not avoiding conflict can liberate you from the pack while helping you gain confidence.

The metamorphoses into an alpha male cannot happen overnight. You have to condition yourself for it. Once you have mastered this persona, you should see a lot more dates and have a better perception of yourself throughout your career. Here are some ways that you can develop your inner alpha male.

Thinking Is Being

An alpha male is more confident than the rest of the guys around him. While you don’t have to be a complete dick, offering an opinion that goes against the grain and not being afraid to be yourself is a trait that you should be striving for. Have a good attitude and think highly of yourself.

These kinds of guys have minimal insecurities when it comes to women. They don’t let women push them around and they don’t play games. Think of yourself in this light and you will start to see yourself as the kind of guy that you want to be.

Keep Your Fitness In Check

Alpha males are physically fit. You don’t have to be a gym rat, but you should start thinking about getting into shape if you want to adopt this persona. Running 2-3 times per week is enough to help shed some of your winter weight. Think about investing in some small weights to keep around your house. Having decent biceps and a good chest can change your confidence level immensely.

Join a gym if you have to, but make sure that you are getting into shape. It’s going to be hard to implement your new alpha persona if you are self-conscious about your body.

Don’t Try Too Hard To Qualify Yourself!

In most dating situations, the guy will try to qualify himself to the girl. This is seen through bragging about his education, job or income status. You never want to qualify yourself to the girl. You want to be the guy that has women qualifying themselves to you. Have you ever been in a bar and seen a guy trying way too hard to get a girl’s attention?

Maybe they’re being too loud and telling stories about the big deal they just closed. These guys are paper-thin and women see right through it. You don’t want to be that guy. Being an alpha male is about conveying confidence without looking like you’re trying.

Ban Jealousy From Your Life

Alpha males do not get jealous. One of the most common characteristics of men is that they get jealous when their girlfriends or potential dates are hanging all over another guy. Because this is a common characteristic of men, women know how to use it to their advantage. If they are not getting the attention they want or they are simply trying to make you jealous, it is in your best interest to not respond. Your goal is to go against the grain.

When a girl is trying to make you jealous and you show that it doesn’t bother you, she will take notice. She will start thinking, “Why isn’t he getting upset?” Even if it does make you angry, don’t let it show.

Ban Neediness From Your Life

There is nothing more pathetic than a guy that is needy or clingy. If you have ever been accused of being needy or clingy, it’s time to make a change that will stick. Calling or texting all the time, having to see her every day or inviting yourself along to different events displays clinginess and neediness. If you feel the need to call all the time, set up a schedule. Make sure that you’re not calling her every day. Call her every 2-3 days so that she knows that you’re interested, but that you’re not needy.

Women can’t stand a needy guy and alpha males do not need to have women around them. Jealousy shows insecurity. You should have enough confidence in yourself to know that she is not going to be interested in other guys after she meets you. Resist the temptation of calling and texting, especially the day after a date, and you should start to see more positive results. When you do call or text, she will be a lot more open to seeing you again.

1. Not Being A Gentleman

Another of the FASTEST ways a man can turn off a woman is by not being a gentleman.

Simply put, a woman sees a guy who isn’t a gentleman as NOT A REAL MAN. A woman is programmed to want a guy who can take care of her when the going gets tough – and you need to show her this in small ways when you are hanging out with her.

So open doors for her, walk on the street side of the curb, and pay the bill when it comes.

Make sure you are also polite to those you come in contact with. A woman WILL judge you on how you treat waiters, cab drivers, and everyone else.

I know of one super attractive girl who told me she broke up with a guy because of the way he treated his mom when they were out to dinner. She asked him nicely to stop cussing and he began cussing louder as if to spite her. She stopped dating him the next day and never looked back.

Some guys think it’s strange that a woman would judge them on what seems like small-time stuff, but I think it’s AWESOME! The reason why is because it’s a super easy way to score points and get an advantage over other guys!

So spend a few minutes reading up on chivalry and how to be a gentleman.

2. Not Taking Control

Another way guys either score easy points with a woman or LOSE points fast is by whether or not they take control of a situation.

A man should always choose the date spot, and when you get there, take the initiative. Ask her if there’s anything she doesn’t like, then tell her to “trust you” and order for both of you (avoiding anything she said she doesn’t like, of course).

Ask any woman and she’ll tell you, a girl LOVES a man who takes control! This applies to the date, having sex, you name it.

So have a plan, take control, and be the man!

It’s FAR better to take control and accidentally take her to a place she’s not super into than it is to keep asking her what she wants to do. In fact, if you ask a “10,” she’ll tell you, this is one of the BIGGEST things women hate!

3. Not Thinking About Your Hygiene The Way WOMEN Do!

You’d think having good hygiene would be common sense, but after talking to dozens of women and hearing them all complain about it. I’ve figured out the mistake most guys make in this area is not thinking about hygiene the way WOMEN do.

So think about it this way – when you are on a date with a woman, she is deciding whether or not she is going to get physical with you.

So, she’s sizing up:

• Your Lips/Breath – if you have chapped lips get some lip balm! And it’s never a bad idea to carry Altoids or gum. Sometimes it’s hard to tell if your own breath is bad, and it’s not worth chancing it.
• Your Hands – if you don’t have clean, well-manicured nails, she’s not gonna want your hands on her! Same with rough hands – women HATE calluses – get some of that apricot scrub and give your hands a good scrub before you go out with a girl.
• Your Smell – a little cologne is a good thing, but too much will give a girl “grease ball” thoughts. Same goes for too much hair gel. Less is more.
• Excessive Hair – shave or wax your back and unibrow! Not cool, and YES women notice, even if you’re wearing a shirt. And make sure you’re well-groomed “down there” if you plan on going further. Nothing brings a woman’s advances to a screeching halt faster than a jungle love afro in the wrong place!

Also, make sure during every bathroom trip you make sure nothing is in your teeth or your nose. You don’t want her staring at your face like a dart board all night.

Although every woman loves a romantic candlelit dinner or a trip to a vineyard, you don’t have to be extravagant in order to bring a little more romance into the relationship. Having fun on a date is essential. There are a few things that you can do without spending your rent while still maintaining a high level of romance. Here are some date ideas to help you get a little closer with your significant other.

Head To A Carnival

Carnivals are great date ideas because they incorporate everything fun about being with your girlfriend or wife. Take your girl to a carnival in your area and she will have the time of her life trying to figure out the different games. Buy her a candy apple or some cotton candy. Try your own luck at the games in order to get her a stuffed animal. Take a ride on the Ferris wheel and flirt with her or hold her hand.

Being suspended 100 feet in the air might seem terrifying, but she will enjoy being able to look out over the entire venue. Carnivals usually have a couple of bands or shows at them, so be sure to stick around. Bring a blanket with you so you aren’t sitting on the ground. Hold her close during the show and she will feel the romance without the humdrum of dinner and a movie.

Take A Walk Through The City

A really cute date idea is to take a walk through the city on a nice night. Almost everybody has a city within twenty minutes of them, so take a drive if need be. Walk while holding hands throughout the city and stop at the various shops that you come to along the way. You’ll be surprised how much fun you have stopping at thrift stores, little boutiques, smaller restaurants and hole in the wall music venues.

Go to the ATM beforehand and pull out about $40. Some places will have a cover charge so you’ll need to pay in cash before you can go inside. You don’t have to dress up in order to take a walk throughout the city, however, you might want to put on something that is a little nicer so that you are not barred from stopping at more sophisticated restaurants or bars.

Check Out Local Events

One of the coolest date ideas is to go to a local event that you have never been to before. Most cities and towns will have local art shows, crafts fairs or live music. Not only will this get you out of the house, it can also help break down some of the same old dinner and a movie dates.

Check your local publications as well as local online websites to figure out when you’re going to have some local events in your area. These publications and online websites are the best resource for finding out exactly when you will be able to attend. Have dinner somewhere that you have never been to before to spice things up even more. Local events involve a lot of walking so make sure that you and your date have comfortable shoes.

Volunteer Your Time Together

Volunteering is also another great date idea. We all live busy lives and it’s hard to grab a quick second for yourself, let alone for charity. However, giving back to the community is important and getting involved with a volunteer program can help you achieve this. Join a volunteer program that involves an issue you care about. Take your date along with you to volunteer and you will bond over helping out with the charity.

Charities and other volunteer programs are always looking for people to help out so she will be a welcome addition to their team. Always be informed of what you’ll be doing beforehand so that you can dress accordingly. The program might want you to bring something to the event so get in touch with the event staff. Let them know that you are coming and get any requests of materials needed during the event.

Your date will be able to see you giving back to the community, which is romantic. She will also enjoy giving back herself, which will make your date a nice change from the traditional movie or dinner.

I had a lot of guys interested in online dating asking me when MySpace was hot, “How do I meet women on MySpace?” Now that Facebook is hot, it’s “How do I meet women on Facebook?”

The reality is I use online social networking sites for that—social networking. Not online dating. I use them to build up a connection with just guys and girls for when I want to throw parties. I don’t really use these sites exclusively for dating because when I’m on Match.com and PlentyOfFish.com I meet more women who are on the lookout for dates.

Why Social Media Sites Aren’t Your Best Option

The other thing is I always look for is the low-hanging fruit, the path of least resistance. What does this mean? A woman on a social network is there because everyone else is. It’s free. She doesn’t have to pay a membership fee to put up a profile and idly browse her friends list for photos or anything else that might interest her. On the other hand, a woman who’s paying $25 a month to receive e-mails from guys is definitely looking to date. Who do you think will be more receptive to my advances? The second one, obviously.

“But Dave, I REALLY want to date girls on Facebook and MySpace!” Alright, I hear you. And, I can’t say I haven’t tried it. In fact, I got dates through social networks frequently enough to develop a good strategy for it.

Social Media vs. Online Dating Websites

The big difference between these sites and dating sites is they’re not really traditional dating sites, so some of the rules don’t apply. For example, a good-looking girl on Facebook may not be looking for a boyfriend right now, which means she might freak or “unfriend” you if you try to pick her up the way you would in a traditional dating site. The trick: be discreet.

A lot of women are on social networks and they might want to meet guys. However, they’re not going to blatantly come out and say, “I’m on here to date somebody!” You have to play the same game. When you’re emailing these women, and when you build your profile, be mindful not to be too obvious that you’re on there for hooking up.

How To Structure Your Profile

On your profile, remove anything that has to do with dating, and basically just talk about yourself—things you’re into and how great life is, etc.

Have some pictures of you and your friends. That’s what is important. If you just remove all the romantic stuff and all the needy type of stuff, you’ll do just fine with that.

Keep your profile description very short. Keep your e-mails friendly, but short. Here’s why. You don’t want to come off like you’re trying to pick them up initially.

One thing that works really well on social media websites is requesting to be included in a girl’s friends list before you e-mail her. This way, she’ll check out your profile first. Once you e-mail her a day later, she will already be a little bit more familiar with you so you’ll have a much better response.

Working Your Game

Strip clubs are an excellent environment in which to practice. In this environment, a power shift takes place – it’s the guys who are the commodity, who have the power to decide which women they want to spend time with. This means no matter what the outcome of your trip to the place, you’re going to benefit as long as you take this opportunity to work on your game.

This is also why you should never be intimidated about going alone. As long as you project a relaxed, confident vibe, strip clubs give you opportunities to chat with hot chicks, engage them in conversations, and develop your conversational skills and confidence.

Practice makes perfect, and strip clubs are an awesome way for guys to work on their game, test out new conversational techniques, and become at ease around beautiful women.

Getting To Know Staff Members Other Than The Dancers

If there is a particular club you hang out at, or intend to start hanging out at, make sure to befriend other staff members besides the doorman. Introduce yourself to the bouncers, coat check, bus boys, DJ’s, and the managers and owner, if you get the opportunity.

Meeting the manager is easy. If this is one of your local clubs, you should go ahead and do this. Tell your waitress you need to ask the manager a question, and ask her to point him out. (The manager is usually hanging out in the area, keeping an eye on things.) Approach him, introduce yourself and shake his hand, and tell him you recently started coming to the club and love the place.

What To Say

Stroke his ego a little. Tell him you’re impressed with how well-run the place is, and how the dancers and staff are a lot of fun to hang out with. Then tell him you’re interested in possibly hosting a bachelor party at the club. Ask him if they offer any special “party packages” – if you might be able rent a private room and some dancers, etc. He’ll gladly tell you about your options.

This simple, short conversation will ensure that whenever you come to this club in the future, the management is going to remember you. If you come back in the future and the manager ever inquires about your bachelor party plans, just tell him your buddy caught his fiancée screwing around with another guy and the wedding is off—but you appreciate him giving you the info.

When you visit, staff members should know and greet you. This gives you high social value in the eyes of the dancers; again, nothing about you should indicate that you’re a typical customer.

When the doormen greet you by name, and then the manager stops by your table to say hello – that is huge social proof in a strip club. If you’ve got one or two in your area that you like to go to, you must build this social proof. (Plus, when you bring your buddies there, they’ll be totally impressed.) It’s free, and it’s easy to do. Make those connections!

Getting To Know The Bouncers

Befriending a bouncer is easy, too: say, “Bro, you’re the envy of every guy—hanging out in a club full of beautiful, half-naked women and getting paid for it. You make me want to consider a career change. By the way, my name’s ______.”

Or, “Dude, I envy you. You must see some crazy shit. Hey, what is the craziest thing you ever had to kick a guy out for?”

Have a short chat. You’ve just made a new friend who could probably bench-press a Volkswagen, and will give you massive social proof the next time you arrive.

Getting To Know The DJ’s

I especially like to make friends with the DJ’s. These guys are total “insiders.” They know all the strippers and can provide you with all sorts of info. All you need to do is pay them a compliment and show some interest in what they do: “Hey, what was the last song called? That was crazy. So do you DJ anywhere else?”

You can also throw in some terminology that is easily learned on the Internet, but be careful if you do because if you’re just throwing fancy words around and don’t have a decent grasp on the subject, you’ll get outed as a phony pretty fast. You might say something like this:

“This one of the tightest sets I’ve ever heard in a strip club. The last place I went to, the DJ was trainwrecking left, right and center. The beats were all over the place. He didn’t know a crossfader from a cross-over dribble.”

I’m going to ask you all a tough question today.

Are you dating based out of need because you don’t want to be alone or are you dating to add somebody to your already wonderful life?

I want you to re-read that once again and ask yourself if you consider things to be wonderful, amazing, and incredible.

“I really think everything is going to be much better this year. I want to have a boyfriend or a girlfriend. I really truly believe that my life is going to be more complete when I have somebody. I want to go on vacation but I’m not going to go on vacation until I get somebody because I won’t have fun unless I’m with somebody.”

Do You Love YOURSELF?

Are you tired of being single? Do you think about it everyday? Here’s the deal – you’re already complete and nobody else is going to ever complete you. If you believe that you is going to be more complete with somebody in it, then basically you’re not practicing the biggest lesson that I ever teach anybody when it comes down to dating – self love.

Why Needy, Clingy Dating Won’t Work

If you don’t love and respect yourself and if you don’t enjoy your own company, then you’re going to go out dating in a very needy way. You’re going to meet other needy people, and when two needy people get together, they have a relationship that is based solely on need, solely on two lonely people meeting each other.

It becomes dysfunctional. It becomes very co-dependent. And a co-dependent relationship is not healthy in any way, shape, or form. Co-dependency is one of the reasons why so many relationships end up unsuccessful.

Enjoying Things As They Are

If you’re serious about meeting somebody great this year then you need to start embracing the beauty of your own life right now. You need to make a list of all the things that are amazing about your life. You need to start writing down all the things that are amazing about you as a person. More importantly, you need to make a list about how amazing it’s going to be when you finally feel all that with somebody else.

We’ve all been dating wrong for so long. It’s not about needs. It’s not about wanting. It’s about how you feel when you’re around somebody and when you’re around yourself.

The Law Of Attraction

Ever since I started really going out there and loving myself and doing the things that I love, I’ve learned the ultimate attraction. I learned the law of attraction. I started attracting great women into my life because I was doing everything that I love. I was going out. I was eating in places that I liked. I went to places where I had things in common with people. I was my own best friend.

Once you master this, you’re going to start bringing all the right people into your life. It’s like magic, and it works. But you need to trust it. You need to believe that people are going to be coming into your life. You need to start having fun, whatever you do, because that’s what attracts everything else.

Have you ever gone out with your arms folded, angry and pissed off? Guess what? Nobody wants to talk to you. Nobody wants to meet you when you behave that way. You’re giving off a very unattractive energy.

It’s time to change the way you think about dating. And it’s time you change the way you thought about meeting people. Learn the law of attraction and life will be so much better.

Ask a girl out once and you should be able to do it a million times, right? Although it may seem simple, various aspects of asking a girl out can rattle a guy to his very core. Concepts like approach anxiety are common with a lot of guys.

It doesn’t matter if you’re shy, nervous or you feel like she’s out of your league, it doesn’t have to be a catastrophe when you ask a girl out. At one point or another you’re going to have to step up your game, and be bold. Here are a few dating tips to get you through the process.

How To Approach Her

Approaching a girl that you like is one of the most difficult aspects of dating. As a guy, you’ve been cursed with the expectation to always initiate contact with the girl. For women, approaching a guy is liberating and can show confidence.

However, the threat of rejection is enough to cripple most men. When you are approaching her, make sure that you have a smile on your face. No girl wants to be approached by a guy with a frown. Don’t rush over to her like a hungry dog looking to be fed. Move a little slower than normal so you draw her in with your approach.

Starting A Conversation

There are a lot of dating tips out there that will tell you to use a specific routine. While these might work for some guys, they aren’t recommended. Routines are a “one size fits all” game that rarely works with girls that you’re actually interested in. Most of these routines are made to get girls to have one-night stands with you.

Simply saying “Hello” or “Hey can easily start a conversation with her. Introduce yourself, but don’t offer a handshake. This is a mistake that a lot of guys make when they approach girls. A handshake is not romantic; it’s business oriented. Wait until you can break the touch barrier before you actually touch her. Keep the conversation to questions about what she does and where she went to school. Judging by her body language, you should be able to tell whether or not she’s interested in you.

Breaking The Touch Barrier

The touch barrier is essential when you’re trying to ask a girl out. The touch barrier is basically the first time that you touch her. This doesn’t mean that you’re going to get to second base, it simply means that you touch her on the arm or the hand. If the approach has gone well then you should have her laughing. Breaking the touch barrier is not very difficult if you are good at flirting.

There are a lot of guys that know how to flirt, but don’t know how to approach. If you have her laughing, she might break the touch barrier before you get a chance to. Wait for her to start flirting back with you and then touch her shoulder or arm when she says something teasingly. Breaking the touch barrier is an essential of many dating tips when trying to get a woman to date you.

Ask For The Number

Asking for her number is much easier than asking her out. The best thing about asking for her number is that you aren’t definitely going to call. Although most guys do call when they the number, there is as much doubt in a girl’s mind as there is in a guy’s mind.

If the conversation is going well and she has broken the touch barrier, ask for her number. More than likely she will give it to you. Be ready with your phone when you do so you’re not fumbling with it while she’s trying to give you the number. A girl is more likely to give you her phone number than to agree to a date right then and there.

Prepare Yourself For Rejection

As with any aspect of dating, there is a chance that you could get rejected. When you go to ask a girl out, make sure that you are prepared for rejection. More than likely she will make up a story of a boyfriend or that she’s dating somebody rather than giving you a fake number. If she says that she has a boyfriend, brush it off and move one.

Don’t question her if she tells you that she has a boyfriend or if she’s not interested. You’re not going to change her mind and you’re wasting your time. Rejection is a part of dating and you need to be able to handle rejection in order to grow as a person.