Human body language is an excessively well-researched and -documented field of scientific study. Today we’re not going to be re-defining the rules of non-verbal communication.

What we will be doing, however, is looking at some examples of male body language which, once adopted by a man, have been shown to increase his appearance as being confident, self-assured, relaxed and masculine which, together, make him more attractive to the opposite sex.

Let’s start with movement.

Movement

The way we men move says a couple of different things about us. First, there’s the movement we’re making. What is the purpose of the movement? What is the motivation behind it? Then there is the way the movement is performed.

For example, a guy is sitting within a group of people in a bar and they are all talking to one another. He leans towards the table to pick up his drink and take a sip of it. That is the movement. Now what is the motivation behind it? He could be thirsty. More importantly, how does he make the movement?

He leans forward quickly, grabs the drink, takes a quick sip, then leans back to place the glass on the table once more. The movement lasted about 3 seconds. After witnessing the movement, the chances are that a woman would conclude the man reached for his drink not because he was thirsty, but because he was nervous.

How does she know this? From the way he made the movement. It was hurried, not calm. He did it while he wasn’t speaking, to give himself something to do and thereby reduce his internal anxiety.

This is the kind of thing you need to avoid when you are talking to a woman you want to attract. Remember the following:

Bear economy of movement in mind. To look relaxed, calm and confident, you need to only move for a good reason. It’s obviously fine to reach for your drink, or stretch out your legs, etc., as long as you are making the movement for a good reason and not one born out of feeling nervous and anxious.

Before you make the movement, briefly consider why you’re making it. You’ll probably be shocked at the number of times you catch yourself about to do something whose only purpose is to relieve some of your internal tension.

You’ll want to put your hands in your pockets, hold your drink in front of your chest, fiddle with the straw in your drink, touch your face for no reason…be aware of and control how often you move and the reasons you make movements.

Think about how you move

After considering why you move, think about how you should move. Don’t rush movements. Don’t hurry or look like you want to get the movement over with, as to not draw attention to yourself.

At the same time, don’t drag the movement out for too long. Taking 20 seconds to reach for your drink will either make you look like a sloth or a show-off. Find the middle-ground. Controlled and calm, not slow.

Are you being open or closed?

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