Have you ever gone to a club, bought a bunch of overpriced drinks, then stood around only talking to your friends while thinking "Why did I come here?"

I remember a few years ago, before I learned any dating tips, I would leave bars or clubs with this frustrated feeling inside me. 

I thought, "I just don’t get it, clubs are supposed to be a place to have fun and meet women.  Where did I go wrong?"

I believe there are five major mistakes that guys make consistently at clubs for this to happen, I know I’ve made them.  I also believe that if guys just stopped doing these five things, their success would improve automatically.

1. Only talking to people you know. 

This first one is fairly obvious, yet many guys do it all the time.  I remember standing there, looking around the club for beautiful women.  When I’d find one, I‘d think to myself “Aha! There’s a beautiful woman” and then I would just keep talking to my friends. 

If you keep talking to the same people, you’re going to get the same results.  You don’t necessarily need to go talk to every beautiful woman you see, you can just start with the person standing next to you. 

Just turn your body a little bit so you lean in from the side and start chatting.  It doesn’t matter if it’s a couple, a group of guys, or some cute women.  What does matter is that you are improving your conversational skills within the club. 

If you’re not sure what to say, look around at your environment for some ideas.  Is there a band or any dancers?  Is anyone doing anything unusual?  Just make a witty comment about the how the opposite of something is true.

For example, if a guy next to me starts taking a whole bunch of tequila shots, I could turn to him and his friends and say “I guess we all know who the designated driver is.”  It’s good to say it in a slightly serious tone and without smiling, so you build a little tension. 

It doesn’t matter how funny it is, it’s just a way to engage others.  Do this to everyone who seems open and you will start having some fun times meeting new people.

2. Caring what others think.

So when you start talking to all different types of people in the club, you’re probably going to meet some friendly people and some not so friendly people (in my experience there are many more friendly people).

What happens if they don’t respond well to you, ignore you, or act rude?

Just move on.  It’s not your job to fix other people; you don’t have control over them.  The only thing you have control of is your own reaction.  You can choose to care about their opinion or to not care about it.

The better you get at talking to more people, the more you will learn that it’s not about you.  Some people go to the club to let go of all their frustrations from the week and combine that with alcohol and you can get all kinds of crazy emotions in the mix.

So if something isn’t working out, just realize it’s their issue and move on.

3. Ignoring the club employees. 

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