Online Dating Shocker – Are All the Men Really Fat and Ugly? (Video)

So you’ve finally created an account on your favorite online dating site. You’re so excited.

But when the search results come back, you’re left speechless.

Where are all of the really hot profile photos that the dating site shows on their home page? Did they all just quit?

Well, not exactly. Most online dating websites put their best photos on the home page. Online dating, like offline dating is a numbers game. A very small percentage of the population is what most people would consider good looking, and even fewer are what most people would consider ‘hot’.

Does this mean that only desperate men and women upload photos online. Definitely not! There are many reasons that very successful and very attractive people join online dating sites.

Maybe they’re too busy to hang out at the local club or just don’t want waste their time actually meeting people with which they have nothing in common. Meeting people online does has the very distinct advantage of allowing you to pre-screen potential dates before spending 2 hours over dinner or movie.

However, the numbers are still true… There will be more unattractive people than really ‘hot’ ones. That just the reality of being human. Keep in mind however that ‘attractive’ is a very subjective term. It means something different to everyone.

So be patient in your search and if you sign up to a dating site that uses a matching algorithm, make sure to fill in as many details as possible so that you’ll get the best matches.

Here’s a question from a very frustrated woman in New York…

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I just scrolled through at least 90 online dating photos and not one of the men was handsome enough to pursue.

I have done this just a few times… The few men that were handsome are 25 or 27 at most. It just shows how men feel it’s ok to neglect themselves. Most women will throw themselves at anything…

I will not go by looks alone but I must start with something. The rep at eHarmony tried to make me feel badly that I was considering looks and physical appeal. I will not back down or apologize for that.

It seems the axiom that if a man is handsome and on the ball he will rarely put himself on an online dating site. Let’s face it isn’t that true? Why would a man need to do that if he’s got the looks and personality?

It is very disheartening and awful…

– Lisa in New York

Watch this short video to see our answer to the question "Are all the men really fat and ugly?".

Don’t forget to go to YouTube and rate the video and subscribe to our channel.

Then, be sure to tell us your thoughts - leave a comment below.

Dan and Jennifer are the Founders and Senior Editors of AskDanAndJennifer.com, which has been called "the best and most popular Love and Sex advice column on the Internet today". Their videos are some of the most popular videos on YouTube. Don't forget to ask your dating, love, and sex questions in the Ask Dan and Jennifer - Love, & Sex Forums. You should Fan Dan & Jennifer on Facebook and Follow them on Twitter!

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Comment Policy: Keep it positive and on topic. Comments will be promptly deleted if that are 1.) spammy (i.e. keyword like "dating tips" in place of your name, 2.) not related to this article, or 3.) in any way offensive or attacking to anyone. It's OK to disagree but it must be in a respectful and positive manner. Thanks!

Janna

Men don't seem to realize that women do look at a man's appearance. They seem to think that if they have a job, a car and a penis that is all that is required. If thye are fat, unattractive or poorly groomed no one will know about the job car or penis.
Why is it that men always think that they deserve an attractive women when they (men) do so little to keep themselves in good physical condition. Most of the men I see look like pregnant women....big guts and boobs. They look disgusting and don't seem to care. Many of these fat-gutted monstrosities actually go outside without shirts. Some men seem to be completely delusional anout their appearance.

Today is that Day

Dan & Jennifer,

Having frequented many different types of dating sites in the past before I was married, I can certainly recognize the concepts that this post speaks of. I often laugh when I see the ads for these sites because even though "hot" people are on the sites, I think these businesses would get more customers if they actually had the guts to post pictures of "normal" people in their advertisements!

As far whether or not looks are mission critical, I have always held with the mentality that the "sum of all parts" must add up to a minimum figure. A high score in one area can offset a low score in another area. However, that being said, I personally believe that there has to be some kind of a spark from the get go, or else there is no fire later.

My 2 pennies on this issue! :)

- Aaron

Paul Martin

I keep waiting for that special woman looking for a housebound, semi bedridden fifty year old who suffers from an extremely rare and bizarre medical condition and can barely walk at all, gingerly shuffling from point A to point B and spending most of my up time kneeling on a chair in front of the computer on gel pads to prevents pressure sores because I also can't sit due to the extensive nerve, bone and connective tissue damage in my low back.

I have great clavicle, rib, and sternum definition - a body builder, really, but in a post-modernist/deconstructivist sense. I have a great personality, including a sense of humor. Why no luck?

Ask Dan and Jennifer