Ask Dan and Jennifer » condom

Love, Sex, and Dating 2008 – The Best of Dan and Jennifer

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 31 Dec 2008 13:55:32 +0000

Just in case you missed any of the excitement this year, here’s a wrap of 2008!

I’m including our best, most talked about, and most controversial love, sex, and dating topics of the year.

Enjoy!

Love & Relationships

Sex & Intimacy

Singles & Dating

Should I Really Be Worried About STDs? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 13:02:15 +0000

When it comes to sexual activity, it can sometimes be confusing as to what can transmit sexually transmitted diseases and what can’t. What types of STD’s can be contracted during which kinds of sexual activity and when are you completely safe?

If you have oral sex can you common STDs like Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, or Herpes?

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Sexual Activity and STD’s.

There’s a reason they’re called "sexually transmitted diseases." You can contract them through virtually any type of sexual activity, including oral sex, anal sex, and vaginal intercourse.

Some sexually transmitted diseases, such as AIDS, HIV and Hepatitis C can be transmitted via blood to blood contact such as receiving a tattoo or piercing with a needle that isn’t sterile. When you have sexual contact or blood to blood contact with someone, you put yourself at risk for contracting or spreading a sexually transmitted disease. How can you protect yourself?

HIV, AIDS and Hepatitis C

HIV, AIDS and Hepatitis C can be spread via blood to blood contact or through vaginal and penile secretions. This includes semen and pre-ejaculation secretions.

The best way to protect yourself against these types of STD’s is to use condoms and dental dams while having oral sex, anal sex and vaginal intercourse, make sure any tattoo or piercing artist uses a sterilized needle and don’t use intravenous drugs.

Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, Syphilis and Other Infections

These types of sexually transmitted diseases are known as viral infections. They are spread by any sexual contact at all, but not through blood to blood contact.

While these are particularly unsavory STD’s, they are most often treated with an antibiotic regimen and can be cured. If left alone long enough, a Chlamydia, Gonorrhea or Syphilis infection can cause a great deal of other bodily damage, including muscle and brain damage, and more commonly sterility.

To protect against these types of sexually transmitted diseases, you should use a condom or a dental dam during any type of sexual activity. Oral sex should also be protected against because viral and bacterial STD’s can set up host in the mouth and throat.

Other Types Of STD’s

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He Pulled Out… Can I Still Get Pregnant? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 06 Jun 2008 14:38:47 +0000

You and your partner having been having intercourse for some time now. You feel like a couple, you’re committed to each other . . . and you’ve been having unprotected sex.

Sure, he’s been pulling out or you’ve been using the calendar method, but how risky are you actually being? Can you get pregnant?

There’s no easy answer to this question, but the answer is always the same. Yes!

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 4 years now. We’re having sex like a couple and he wants to get married and we been having unprotected sex, well he went to pull out but made it to my leg before his cum came out could I get pregnant from that?

- Alyson, Nebraska

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Any sex at all can lead to pregnancy.

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Frustrated Man Can’t Orgasm Wearing A Condom! (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 01 Jun 2008 13:21:22 +0000

If you dislike wearing a condom during sex, you’re certainly not the first! Many people dislike the feeling a condom has or, more to the point, the lack of feeling.

If your partner insists on having you wear a condom during sex every time, you may be frustrated, especially if she’s already using another type of birth control such as the pill.

Why do you have to wear a condom every time? Can you convince her otherwise?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Hi I’ve seen your videos on YouTube. I’ve enjoyed learning new things and love that you’re so willing to share your knowledge. I’ve been seeing this girl for a little while now, things are great, we’re very comfortable and physically compatible in bed, but I haven’t finished inside of her yet. She wants me to, but so far she insists on using a condom and I can’t climax with it on and it’s getting frustrating. The part that really bothers me is that our relationship is suffering because of it. I want to understand why she wants to use a condom when she’s already on the pill. I’m not looking for unprotected sex. What can I do to save our sex life?

- Stan, Ohio

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A Layered Defense

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Who’s Responsible for Contraception – the Man or the Woman?

Rose Rivera — Wed, 07 Nov 2007 16:51:45 +0000

Having sex for the first time with a new partner is always an exercise in silent negotiation.

Issues such as who will take the dominant role or when the undressing will begin abound and are often worked out using body language, eye contact, and other non-verbal communication cues.

Although these stealthy tools are enough to successfully answer most of the questions that arise during those initial moments of sexual bliss, the issue of contraception is not and should not be one of them.

Don’t Rely on Your Partner to “Take Care Of” Contraception

Unfortunately many women still rely on the man to bring a condom, and many men still rely on the woman to be “on the pill.” Obviously this can lead to a very unfortunate situation in which he doesn’t have a condom and she in not taking an oral contraceptive, leaving them with the choice of either not having sex at all, or having unprotected sex.

Both of these options are bad, and more often than not couples will choose to have sex anyway. This decision not only increases their chances of an unwanted pregnancy, but also of acquiring an unwanted sexually transmitted infection such as HIV or herpes. (Remember condoms should not only be used to prevent pregnancy but to prevent the spread of STD’s as well!)

The easiest way to avoid having to make such a hormonally charged decision is for both partners to take equal responsibility for having a condom on their person – be it in a pocket, a purse, a sock, where ever. Even though it’s the man who wears it, the woman gets just as many benefits from its use, and she should feel comfortable taking the initiative to safeguard her own health and well being. In fact some condom companies are marketing male condoms directly to women by using sexy packaging and imagery in order to promote this healthy habit.

Oral contraceptives do not prevent the spread of sexually transmitted infections and should not be the only form of protection used between new lovers. It’s also important to remember that many women rightfully refuse to use oral contraceptives because of the negative side effects they experience while taking them or because of other health concerns. (For example women with a familial history of strokes are advised not to use oral contraceptives).

An even greater number of women discontinue using “the pill” during periods of prolonged abstinence – such as between relationships. So even if she has used oral contraceptives with her past lovers, there’s a good chance that she is not currently using them if this is your first time having sex with each other! Never assume a woman is using an oral contraceptive. If you are unsure, ask her. If you are both ready to have sex, then you should be able to have an honest conversation about contraception.

SHE Should Not Be the Only One Deciding IF Contraception Will Be Used

Another very common, and I think disturbing, trend is…