Ask Dan and Jennifer » condoms

Oral Sex Safety Tips You Can’t Miss

Gabrielle Moore — Tue, 17 Jan 2012 14:00:08 +0000

Oral sex is safer than traditional intercourse when it comes to STD’s, but it’s not 100% safe – here’s how to make oral sex fun and less risky!

How To Get Started

Safe fingering includes the use of medical-grade gloves, which are easily found in most pharmacies or purchased online in a myriad of colors and textures. Some even come pre-lubricated or powdered for a more realistic feel.

Next, grab a brand new dental dam. If you plan on some anal as well as vaginal play, make sure to use to separate dams that don’t come into contact with each other, as you don’t want to give her a nasty infection. Also, try to purchase one specifically made for oral sex; there are some that even come pre-flavored, lubed and/or with a stickable strip at the top for ease of use.

Write on one side of the latex, “Lick here!” so you know which side is closest to you, and which will be up against her skin.

Grab your choice of water-based lubricant and apply some to her side of the dental dam. Put it over her entire vulva, covering her vagina, labia and clitoris.

Using One

Be aware that she’ll need a firmer tongue when using a dental dam than without. Although everything in this series works equally as well with one than not, she won’t be able to feel the friction of your tongue, just the vibrational aspect.

Don’t be afraid to use your teeth lightly. You don’t want to rip the latex, but you do want to apply more pressure than you normally would. So, scraping and light biting isn’t taboo here.

Will A Dam Make It Less Pleasurable?

I’ll be honest: using a one dampens your ability to be an expert cunnilinguist. There’s a lot of sensation lost when latex separates you and your lover, just as it’s different when you use a condom and when you don’t. Having said that, you can still create an unforgettable, amazing oral sex experience for the both of you, but you do need to be aware of the limitations as well. Or, use it to employ different sensations and techniques that you couldn’t without it:

Use the edge of the latex and rake it along her clitoris.
Roll it up and use it as a makeshift finger, either to tease her vulva and clitoris, or inside of her against her G-Spot.
Wrap it around the top of the clitoris, then push and pull the edges to rub and ‘shine’ it.

Why Should I Use One?

Question: Why can’t I just use my fingers to play with her, and then have sex? Can’t I just skip the whole dental dam/oral sex thing entirely?

Even with the protection a dental dam provides against STD’s, and your partner will still receive a lot of pleasure from your oral sex efforts. Why deny her that joy? It’s definitely a challenge for some to get over the mental barrier that dental dams provide, but it’s really just mental, not physical. She’ll still feel good, and you’ll feel even better knowing you can make her happy and sexually satisfied.

How Do I Keep It In Place?

Question: I use dental dams every time I go down on a girl. I don’t mind them, other than I can’t seem to keep them in place and still do all of the things that you’re asking me to do with my hands and so forth. How can I make it work?

If there’s one thing that people complain about loudly when it comes to dental dams, it’s this: trying to hold one in place while using your mouth and fingers to please a woman is a chore indeed, and sometimes, extremely challenging. The other major complaint is the lack of sensation that some women (and men) feel when using a dental dam.

There are some ingenious ways to keep a dental dam secure:

Panties with the crotch cut out, and worn over top of it.
Using garters to attach from one side to another, and wrapping them around the woman’s leg.
Finding the really sticky Saran Wrap, employing it as a dental dam, and molding it to stay in place.
Applying spirit gum to temporarily glue it in place.

Are any of these suggestions reasonable, and field tested to work well? Not really. They might work for you, but for the most part the easiest way is still the way that prevents you from using one hand to please her, and that’s you holding it in place. So instead of trying to figure out ways to keep it in place so that your hands don’t have to, let’s instead explore a method and mindset that requires you to think about how you can stimulate her while still holding it in place.

Get a vibrator or dildo that looks like a penis, and one that will fit without a lot of wiggle room inside of her vagina.
If you chose a vibrator, put it in with just an inch sticking out of her, but if is a dildo, use only the first few inches, where the dildo should be the widest.
Lick her using the routine that suits your needs best, keeping an eye on the dildo or vibrator to make sure that she’s clenching it with her muscles as she gets closer to orgasm.
If you are using a vibrator, you may be able to rest your chin on its edge to steady yourself, as well as to add the extra sensation of a slightly vibrating tongue.

Another option is to purchase a humorous-looking sex toy called The Accomodator, which is basically a dildo that you strap around your ears and attach to your chin. This way, you can lick her clitoris while penetrating her with the face-dildo. Unusual, yes, but if you can get over the laugh-factor, it’s actually a really handy little device.

How To Make Teen Sex Safer

Serena Paige — Tue, 10 Jan 2012 23:00:00 +0000

Teen sex isn’t at all uncommon. If you’re a teenager and considering sex, here’s how to make it safer. Teen sex is no fun if it ends in unwanted pregnancy!

As a teen you’re probably wondering about sex and what you can do to stay safe. Curiosity about sex is normal and it’s something that every teen goes through. It must be said that the only form of safe sex is abstinence. Even though this is the only foolproof way to stay safe, there are countermeasures that you can take to keep you and your partner free of STD’s or unwanted pregnancy. Here are a few ways that you can stay safe with your partner.

Use Condoms

Condoms are a necessity with teen sex. Not only condoms prevent pregnancy, it can prevent the transmission of STDs found in the seminal and vaginal fluids. Teens are notorious for misusing condoms or simply “pulling out.” When a condom is used properly, the chance of preventing pregnancy is about 97%. When used with lubrication, the condom is more unlikely to break. Don’t use household items like latex gloves, plastic wrap or balloons. Condoms are specifically made for the shape a penis and designed to stay on. Never use a condom twice.

Have Enough Lubrication

Lubrication is essential to giving the condom as little resistance as possible. If you’re considering having sex, make sure that you have a bottle of lube with you. Lube is relatively inexpensive and will cost about the same as a box of condoms. Don’t be fooled into thinking that lubricated condoms will be enough. Yes, the condoms come lubricated, but they can also get dried out of they have been in a drawer or in a car for as little as a week.

Where Can I Buy Condoms And Lube?

Teens primarily don’t want to go into a store to buy condoms and lube for fear of seeing somebody that they know. If you’re afraid of buying condoms and lube from a store, you can go to a Planned Parenthood or another health clinic and get them for free. These organizations are around to inform teens about sex and prevent unwanted pregnancy. Teen sex is on the rise and every teen has a responsibility to be informed of staying safe.

Consider Getting On The Pill

The pill is a good way to protect against pregnancy, but it does nothing for sexually transmitted diseases. If you are on the pill then you have taken the first step against getting pregnant. Now it’s important to know that you can still contract STI’s and STD’s. Make sure that your partner is wearing a condom every time that the two of you have sex. If you are considering the pill, there are a few things that you should know. The pill can affect different people different ways. It’s important to talk to your physician before you go on the pill Ask them how the pill they are putting you has affected other teens. Try to get on a pill that will keep your skin clear. Several of them will do this.

Are You Ready?

We’ve all read about teen sex, but ask yourself if you’re really ready to do it. If don’t know, ask yourself why you want to. Are you doing it to please a boyfriend? Do you really care about your boyfriend and you’re ready to take it further? Remember that as a teenager you will have hormones racing through your body and lust can easily misconstrued for love. Do not give into pressure from a boyfriend to have sex. This can ruin your first time and the first time should be special.

Make Sure It’s Legal

Teen sex is not something that usually ends up as front-page news, but there are laws against having sex with a minor. If you are under the age of consent in your state and your boyfriend is over the age of consent, you need to look up the legal ramifications for having sex. Your boyfriend could go to jail if you get caught. Remember this before you commit to anything.

It’s Okay To Say No

Saying no doesn’t mean that you’re a tease, it just means that you’re not ready. If you’re being pressured by your boyfriend to have sex and you don’t want to, you should tell him no. A lot of girls get pressured into sex with the fear that if they don’t do it, their boyfriends will leave them. If your boyfriend really cares about you then he will want you to be ready when it happens. If he doesn’t care about then he might break up with you.

Abstinence Is An Excellent Option

Abstinence is a choice that many girls make. This is very respectable and can improve the lives of women who choose to keep their virginity until marriage. Choosing abstinence is way of ensuring that you will complete school with a having a child and get into the work force quickly. This can also be a way to see if your boyfriend really loves you and if he’s willing to wait before the two of you have sex.

The 10 Condom Commandments

Kaylen Jackson — Thu, 29 Dec 2011 15:00:17 +0000

Condoms are essential for safe sex, but do you know the ten condom commandments?

1. Always Have One With You

Always have condoms handy, wherever you go. Guys, don’t carry them in your pocket or wallet though. It’s easier for a girl, because condoms can easily go in the purse without worry, but the heat from a pocket or wallet can degrade the latex material. Don’t keep them in the car either, or you’ll expose them to even more extreme temperatures of heat or cold, depending on what season it is.

Guys, stash them in your nightstand, your bathroom, your locker at the gym, your desk at work and anywhere else you can think of where you can grab one and go if you need to.

2. Learn How To Put It On The Right Way

You may think you know how to put on a condom correctly, but you may not. There’s a certain way to grip it at the base, and you of course have to leave enough space at the top for semen. Take the time to read the instructions (they’re in every box) and follow them to a T. Incorrect condom use is mainly what is responsible for condom failure. Studies show that when put on, worn and used correctly, that the success rate is much, much higher.

3. Always Check For Holes, Expiration Dates, Etc.

So your buddy gave you a condom “just in case.” You’d better check it out. Inspect the wrapper for tears, holes or other issues and always make sure the condom isn’t expired. Do this for your own stash too – that box of condoms you have tucked away in your bathroom medicine cabinet may be older than you think. If one is questionable, toss it and get a new one. You can afford it. You can’t afford the alternative or you wouldn’t care enough to use one at all.

4. Get Your Correct Size

A LOT of guys assume that they need the large or “magnum” size condoms, when in reality, a regular condom will do just fine. The different sizes out there are based on length AND width, so check out what size condom you need and use the correct one. Using a condom that is too tight can cause it to break, or using one that is too loose can cause it to slide off.

5. Use Plenty Of Lube

Lube makes sex feel better anyways, but it also makes condoms work better. Put a dab of lube on the inside of the condom before you put it on for heightened sensations, and make sure to coat the outside and get it good and wet before intercourse. Plenty of lube will help keep it from stretching too much, tearing or breaking.

6. Experiment With Different Kinds

Don’t just pick up the most random box of condoms you can find and use those. Take some time to find out which ones fit best and feel best. Get a variety pack and pay attention to the different sensations and which ones are better for you and your partner. Go online and purchase some of the higher quality condoms used by professionals in the porn industry. If condoms are going to be your new favorite accessory (and they SHOULD be if you’re not in a monogamous relationship), then spend the time and money to find a brand and style that you really enjoy.

7. Don’t Forget Them For Oral Sex

Oral sex is “technically” safer than vaginal or anal sex when it comes to the transmission of STD’s, but that doesn’t mean that you should forgo the rubber if you’re having oral sex. Use flavored condoms for oral sex, because they taste (and smell) much better than regular condoms. ABOVE ALL, do not use condoms treated with spermicide for oral sex! If going down on a girl, cut the condom lengthwise and put over the vulva like a dental dam, with a squirt of lube in between her and the rubber.

8. Discuss Condoms BEFORE Having Sex!

Do not discuss them five seconds before penetration, or even afterwards. The last thing you want to do is afterwards have to ask, “Hey, did you wear one?” If you’re hooking up, discuss it before the clothes even come off. If you’re too drunk to put one on correctly or too drunk to care, then you’re too drunk to get it on. Have the conversation about safety as soon as you decide that yes, you’re going to be taking your pants off for this person.

9. Keep Tools On Hand In Case Of Breakage

Condoms can break. Even when you put them on correctly, even when you do everything you’re supposed to. It can happen. So make sure you have a backup plan. If you’re not super sensitive to spermicide, consider using it in addition to the condom just in case. Spermicides are handy – they come in a variety of different forms that sometimes, you or your partner can’t even feel! The “thin film” kind can be folded and inserted into the vagina, where it melts and can’t be felt AT ALL. Suppositories are similar, while gels and foams are a little more messy. If you haven’t used spermicide before sex and the rubber breaks, have a bottle of gel or foam spermicide on hand that you can insert immediately – however, the suppositories and films won’t work well after the fact.

Also consider birth control – if you’re on birth control regularly and also use condoms, your layers of safety are well put in place. If you choose not to use birth control regularly, consider having the morning after pill (called Plan B and available at pharmacies and Planned Parenthood across the country) available. If you choose to use Plan B, have it on hand. Do NOT wait until you have a breakage to go get it. There’s a small window in which the medicine can really be effective, and this window is AS SOON as you can, but before 72 hours has passed. The more hours that pass between the breakage and the Plan B, the less effective the medication will be.

10. NO GLOVE, NO LOVE!

If you’re with someone who you are not monogamous with, who hasn’t been STD tested, or you aren’t sure of their sexual history (or all of the above), use a condom. Do not compromise, do not allow yourself to be talked out of it. Do not let someone say they’ll pull out, or that you don’t need one because they “love you.” If you don’t want an STD or an unplanned pregnancy, protect yourself. Insist on if there’s no glove, there will be no love. PERIOD. Do not compromise. Do not budge. If they want it bad enough, they’ll put it on. If not, they weren’t worth your time anyways.

Oral Sex: Safety Considerations When Going Down On A Woman

Michael Webb — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 23:16:54 +0000

Oral sex is mostly safer than intercourse when it comes to STD’s, but the risk is still there. Find out how you can make oral sex as safe as possible.

Will She Really Enjoy It If You Use Precautions?

What are the proper precautions when practicing safer cunnilingus and other sexual foreplay involving the vulva? Well, they’re no fun. Safer sexual contact during these activities involves lots of latex and frankly, most women will be completely turned off by the mere suggestion of a dental dam.

Why use one then? If the woman is not going enjoy cunnilingus, why bother?

Well, for starters, if she’s that uptight about it, then don’t bother. Just think of it this way – men wear condoms. Men hate condoms. Why do they wear them? That’s easy – to keep from having children and contracting STD’s. Most men will sacrifice the extra pleasure of intercourse without a condom considering the alternatives. Certainly, a woman should be willing to sacrifice some pleasure for the sake of keeping both parties safe and STD-free. If there are valid risks associated with performing oral sex for a particular partner and she will not oblige to practicing safer sex, again we say: don’t bother.

Tools For Safer Oral Sex

But for those who are interested in practicing safer cunnilingus and other foreplay, there are a slew of tools that can be used at your discretion – you may even have some in your kitchen drawer right now. You may have heard of dental dams – you know, those little latex squares they use at the dentist’s office to isolate a tooth. Those are great for using during oral sex, but adult toy companies have started making what they call “lollyes” or “dental dams” – the same concept, but labeled specifically for oral sex.

If you’re in the heat of the moment and haven’t got anything else on hand, plastic wrap will work just fine (see, we told you it might be in your kitchen drawer). If you haven’t put two and two together yet, the dental dam/lollye/plastic wrap goes in between your partner’s vulva and your tongue. Lubrication is very, very important if you’re using any of these items during cunnilingus. Just imagine a very dry latex condom. Uncomfortable, right?

Plus, having lube on the vulva-side of the latex or plastic will mimic the feeling of a wet tongue more closely. Remember though, oil-based lubricant can cause latex to break down – always use water-based lubricant.

Gloves, Etc.

If you plan on engaging in foreplay of the vulva using your hands, you may want to consider using a latex glove if you’re concerned about the risk of transmitting STD’s. Truthfully, infections such as gonorrhea, Chlamydia and the like generally aren’t going to be transmitted through hand-to-vulva contact. If, however, there are open sores or cuts on the hands, fingers or vulva, you do run the risk of possibly transmitting or contracting an STD.

Unlike with cunnilingus, using a latex glove does not hinder the pleasurable feelings in the least – in fact, when properly lubricated; a gloved finger may feel more heavenly than one with calluses and hangnails. Just keep in mind that a dry latex glove doesn’t feel good – remember to use plenty of water-based lube. Although some of these ideas may seem like no fun, it really is better to be safe than sorry.

A caring partner will happily oblige if you request protection for both her and yourself if you are concerned about sexually transmitted diseases. And if she doesn’t happily oblige? You may want to reconsider sexual relations with this person entirely.

Last Longer In Bed Tonight With These 5 Simple Tricks

Jack Grave — Mon, 21 Nov 2011 17:50:18 +0000

Last longer in bed and “WOW” your girl this evening with these five easy tips. When you last longer in bed, she will LOVE it!

These tips I’m about to share with you are “quick-fix” solutions. These solutions require virtually NO extra effort and they are great to use when you don’t have time to implement a long-term strategy for treating premature ejaculation or you just want some instant results to last longer TONIGHT.

So don’t look at these as the “ultimate solution” to premature ejaculation, but look at them as a powerful starting point and a way to help you build some momentum in learning how to get full control in the bedroom.

Masturbate Before Sex

If you’ve got the time, masturbate once before you know you’re going to have sex. Having one orgasm in the day means you’re much more likely to last longer the second time round during sex.

Wear A Thick Condom

One of the causes of premature ejaculation is experiencing too much stimulation and getting overwhelmed with pleasure. One “quick-fix” way to put a stop to this is with a thick condom that will reduce the pleasure you feel. It’s not an ideal solution, because it will make sex less pleasurable, but you will get the longer-term pleasure of long-lasting sex.

Do Math In Your Head

Here’s another “last ditch attempt to gain control” method you can use when nothing else is working. Try doing some complicated math in your head. By having to work out something complicated it takes your focus away from the pleasure going on in your genitals and so will delay your orgasm.

Urinate Before Sex

This is such a simple trick, but almost no man does it. You probably don’t realize this, but having a full bladder puts pressure on your genitals which encourages early orgasm. Put a stop to this unnecessary cause of premature ejaculation by urinating before you have sex.

Lick The Roof Of Your Mouth

This actually originates from Tantric sexual practices. The theory is that by licking the roof of your mouth you transfer energy up your body away from the genitals and in the process you last longer. Whether you believe the theory or not doesn’t really matter, what matters is that it works so I highly recommend you give it a try.

Pull Out And Give Her Oral Sex

Do you ever find yourself getting close to orgasm and feel like there’s nothing you can do? Well don’t just keep thrusting away expecting to miraculously be able to last longer, take corrective action. If you pull out and give her oral sex you’ll give yourself that much needed break from stimulation but at the same time you’ll keep the pleasure going for her. It’s a win-win move because you get to last longer and she still gets pleasure.

Q&A: First Time Sex – Is A Condom Enough?

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 11 Nov 2011 17:37:44 +0000

First time sex can be nerve wracking, even if you’re taking precautions. There are plenty of things to worry about when it comes to first time sex, such as pain, sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancy. Safe sex is always important, but is using a condom all you need to do?

Question: My boyfriend and I are planning on having our first time soon, and we both said condoms are a must, I’m very pleased with that, but I’m still afraid it will break or rip or leak and I will become pregnant. So I’m trying to find out what the best brand is. Thickest perhaps? We want a latex condom for sure though. Is there any way to help settle my nerves so I can enjoy our first time?

Is A Condom Enough?

If you want to practice safer sex, using a condom during intercourse is an absolute must. But is using a condom all you need to do? Planned Parenthood says that each year, 2 out of every 100 women who always use condoms correctly will become pregnant. They go on to say that each year, 15 out of 100 women who use condoms incorrectly will become pregnant. So what does it mean to use a condom correctly? Surprisingly, it takes a lot to put on a condom “correctly,” including washing your hands before, leaving enough space for the semen at the tip and taking it off correctly. Many people fail to do this when they’re passionate and in the heat of the moment. Condoms are a must, but they really aren’t enough – they are, however, a great first layer of defense.

Hormonal Birth Control

Many people choose to use hormonal birth control in addition to using condoms, especially for first time sex. There are many forms of birth control including the popular pill, the ring, the patch, injections and even implants that last for five years! There are lots of options, so be sure to talk with your doctor about the right options for you. Hormonal birth control does not protect against sexually transmitted diseases, so it’s important to continue using condoms if you’re with a partner who has not been tested or if you are not monogamous. Birth control will, however, significantly reduce your risk of an unplanned pregnancy, even more so if you use birth control and condoms together.

Barrier Methods

Barrier methods of birth control are often overlooked, simply because hormonal contraceptives are so popular. Some women can’t use hormonal birth control, so a barrier method is a great choice. You can use a barrier method in addition to condoms if you are unable to use birth control, or you can use a barrier method as yet another layer of defense against unplanned pregnancy. However, keep in mind that condoms are the only thing that help reduce your risk of contracting STD’s. Barrier methods include spermicide (available in gel, foam, suppository or a small, thin film that you can fold and place inside your vagina), as well as cervical caps and diaphragms which are usually available at your doctor’s office but may have to be specially made to fit you.

There Is Always A Small Chance

The only 100% effective form of birth control and STD prevention is abstinence. If you want to be absolutely, positively sure that you won’t get pregnant, consider abstinence. No method of birth control including condoms and barrier methods are 100% effective. Yes, they greatly reduce your risk of STD’s and pregnancy, but even with a double or triple layer defense, there is still a very tiny, very small chance that you could become pregnant or contract an STD.

Don’t assume that you are completely safe and fail to make plans if you should become pregnant. Have the conversation with yourself and your partner about what would happen if you did become pregnant. What would you do? How would you handle it? If you’re not ready to have this conversation in the event that your birth control fails, then you’re definitely not yet ready for first time sex. Dealing with the hard questions up front not only shows maturity, it also makes things easier for you later if something does actually happen – that way, you’re not completely unprepared. Recognizing the risk but taking as many precautions as possible and practicing safe sex is the best thing you can do if you want to make sex safer and reduce the risk of STD’s and unplanned pregnancy as much as you can.

Oral Sex: Why YOU Need To Think About Safer Fellatio!

Michael Webb — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 19:00:36 +0000

Oral sex isn’t as risky as intercourse when it comes to STD’s, but there is still plenty of risk involved. There’s even more risk involved if you swallow your partner’s semen. Here’s the reason YOU need to think about safer fellatio!

Safer Oral Sex

This is a question with a simple enough answer – or maybe not. Safer oral sex practices depend on the type of sexually transmitted disease that you’re trying to prevent against. If you’re trying to prevent them all, you might as well just go and get a trash bag to cover your partner’s penis and his entire genital area. This is why it is so, so important to have regular exams and STD testing if you and your partner are not monogamous or if you plan to be monogamous, just one STD test before hooking up.

Condoms Are Essential!

If you’d like to practice safer oral sex and don’t enjoy the trash bag idea, you can still protect yourself from many of the other sexually transmitted diseases by using condoms. Condoms will not protect you against genital herpes or the human papillomavirus, however they are so much safer than unprotected oral sex. If you’re fairly concerned about herpes or genital warts, you can combine a condom with plastic wrap (easily found at your local grocery store) to protect your hands and face from coming into contact with skin in your partner’s genital area.

What Kind Of Condoms To Use

The best condoms for fellatio are either the non-lubricated kind or the kind with flavored, edible lubricants. If you try to perform fellatio on a partner wearing a regular, lubricated condom (especially if it is lubricated with spermicide) you are going to be sorry! If you or your partner have a latex allergy, polyurethane condoms are available and can actually be much more useful during fellatio than regular condoms because they tend to be thinner. However, the flavored condoms (which usually come in their corresponding colors) add a bit of fun to a fellatio session while still protecting you and your partner against sexually transmitted diseases that can be contracted through fellatio.

Think About Gloves Too

Condoms are not the only safer-sex tool that you should have on hand if you’re planning on a great (and safer!) fellatio session. Many guys enjoy hand action in addition to oral when receiving fellatio and to be perfectly honest – if infected semen comes into contact with your hands and you happen to have a small cut or abrasion (such as a paper cut) on your skin, you are at a high risk of contracting a sexually transmitted disease. Latex or polyurethane gloves can be your best friend during a fellatio session! These are also great if you are planning to touch your partner’s anus and all and it even keeps long or untrimmed nails and hangnails from scratching your partner and making him uncomfortable.

Don’t Brush It Under The Rug

Sure, insisting on condoms or even gloves during oral sex might make you feel like you’re “ruining the mood,” and it may even make your partner look at you like you’ve lost your mind. That is, however, better than the nurse at the health clinic looking at you like she’s about to tell you that you have HIV.

Oral Sex – Safety First (And How To Talk To Your Partner About It)

Gabrielle Moore — Fri, 21 Oct 2011 17:00:07 +0000

Oral sex is commonly engaged in without thought to safety – but you should take precautions. Here’s how to have safer oral sex, and how to bring it up.

Why You Need To Consider Safer Oral Sex

It’s relatively common for people, especially with younger couples, to engage in oral sex without talking about safety first. As the Guide to HIV at About.com reports in an article called: The Risk of Oral Sex, many believe that oral sex is a low-risk activity because of its inability to get someone pregnant. Unfortunately STD’s are still a concern, even if they aren’t as prevalent as with penis-vagina intercourse.

Oral sex also increases the risk of other STDs, such as Herpes, Human Papillomavirus (HPV), Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, and Hepatitis C. These nasty bugs are transmitted by saliva, skin-to-skin contact, genital lubrication, and/or ejaculate, and can then be passed along to someone else via more oral sex, kissing, or other forms of skin-to-skin contact.

Barrier Methods

You may be familiar already with dental dams; they are what dentists use to keep any bits and pieces during a root canal or other mouth surgery from falling down your throat. These simple pieces of latex are slowly becoming well known in lesbian and bisexual circles, and men are now following suit.

Most, but not all dental dams are made out of latex. They stretch and are flexible, but hold their shape and are much firmer than say, Saran Wrap. They are square and come in several different colors, translucency and tastes. Almost all of them are powdered, and it isn’t terribly difficult to find ones that are flavored, scented, or both.

If the taste or smell of an cunnilingus encounter isn’t your favorite part of the occasion, dental dams are a very welcome addition to your arsenal. The only issue with them however is that latex takes a bit of getting used to in the taste department as well, so it’s highly recommended that with your first few attempts, you purchase a package that offers a variety of flavors or scents to get you through those first few moments of uncertainty.

Latex Allergies

For those with allergies to latex, there are a few options to consider. The easiest is to buy some Saran Wrap that isn’t made to be used in the microwave; there are extra additives in the special stuff that isn’t vagina-friendly. A step up from Saran Wrap (which can be difficult to keep in place) is to buy some non-latex condoms, like polyurethane condoms, and then cut a slit up one side of them to make it into a longer, flatter piece.

What A Dental Dam Feels Like

‘Feeling’ a woman while using a dental dam takes a bit of getting used to – just like using a condom. You won’t feel the squishiness of your partner’s excitement, and it’ll be more difficult to tell how she’s reacting to your hard work. Getting your tongue in the right place can also be trickier, because you’re having to feel her with your tongue through the barrier. Yes, these are definite drawbacks, but no more so than using a condom – and as already discussed, their drawbacks are more than worth the knowledge that you’re having protected sex.

Getting The Dental Dam Ready To Use

Choose the side that you want to lick and the side that you want pressed up against your partner. Dab some lube on the side that is going on your partner – it will feel MUCH better to her. Also, make sure to keep the same side on her each time, or else you’ve defeated the purpose of using a dental dam. If you can’t remember which side you were licking, discard it and grab another one. An easy way to ensure you don’t get mixed up in the heat of the moment is to take a magic marker prior to your sexual encounter, and write on one side, “Lick here!”

Broaching The Subject

Never used a dental dam? That okay. Most women haven’t either. That doesn’t mean she’ll be adverse to using one though she’ll just need a bit of information is all, so she knows what you’re up to, and why. Learn as much as you can before, so that when you do whip one out, you can easily answer all of her questions and alleviate her fears of the unknown.

Do however make a point of letting your partner know that you plan on using a dental dam, especially if it’s the first time that you’re together intimately. Worst case scenario? You don’t tell her and she stops the whole flow of the moment with a, “What on earth is that?!” or something even more jarring, and you’re left crouched between her legs looking sheepish and trying to explain yourself. Trust me: if you take a bit of time to explain what a dental is, and why you’re using one, you’ll save yourself tons of embarrassment and heartache, and might even earn a few brownie points for ensuring you’re both safe sexually.

How To Use a Dental Dam

Let’s first begin with keeping the slip of latex in place. There are only three ways: you hold it, your partner holds it, or you use something to hold it in place. Of the three, having something else hold it in place is by far the most desirable. In the throes of orgasm she’ll struggle with keeping it in place, and you’ll want the extra hand for other activities as we move through this process.

Therefore, when purchasing dental dams, look for the ones that have an adhesive tip along the top, so that it sticks to wherever you put it in this case, along the top of her Mons Pubis. If the woman you are giving oral sex to is clean shaven however, you can use double sided tape or spirit gum instead, just make sure that you don’t get any near her vulva or vagina.

When first using a dental dam on your partner, try and do what you’d normally do without one. See how she reacts, and if she asks for more or less stimulation. Check her sexual response as well, and if she’s not getting aroused as you’d expect, increase the pressure to her clitoris or add a bit more lube to see if that makes a difference.

Lube – The Lowdown On Why You Need It And What To Get

Gabrielle Moore — Tue, 18 Oct 2011 17:00:05 +0000

Lube is essential for sex to be really great – no matter what you might have heard before. Here’s what to get and why.

Why Lube?

Sexual lubricants add a lot to the lovemaking process. Depending on their function, timing, and use, they can help a woman achieve orgasm faster, make sex feel better, and alleviate uncomfortable aftereffects (like chafing or burning). Sure, your own spit works just fine it’s free, always available, and works. But it only works for a short time, and sometimes you want a lubricant that will last a bit longer, taste somewhat different, or serve another function that will heighten the sexual pleasure for both of you.

Factors That Decrease Lubrication

There are some factors that will add or decrease from a woman’s natural lubricant, such as:

Age: Plays an important part of the lubrication process. As a woman gets older, she stops producing as much natural lubrication because of hormonal fluctuations.
Having Kids: It’s common for a woman to have extra moisture when she’s pregnant, and less when she’s breastfeeding. Blame it on the hormones again.
Drugs: A large number of drugs (both prescribed and otherwise) play with a woman’s wetness. Any medication that warns of dry mouth, antidepressants, cold medicines and alcohol all contribute to lower lubrication.
Stress and Travel: Stress reduces anyone’s sexy feelings, but travel could go either way. Some folks use traveling as a way to relax and enjoy some space away from home, but those who travel for work, for instance, may see it as a chore or necessity. Some women who fly a lot have even coined a term called ‘lube lag’, where they find their natural lubrication severely reduced because of their lengthy travel times.
Condoms and Dental Dams: Even though lubricated themselves, condoms have a tendency to dry a woman out, so make sure to have extra lubricant on hand when playing with either.
Menstrual Cycle: It goes without saying that during a woman’s cycle, the amount of lubrication available to her is going to differ. However, you’ll notice that, for some women, the middle of the month (around ovulation) is when she’ll be the wettest, only secondary to when she’s actually menstruating.
Extended Sex Sessions: If you’ve ever had a marathon oral sex session, you’ll be nodding your head as you read this. Not only will you feel raw and dry after about 30 minutes of stimulation, but she’ll be walking a bit funny the next day because of the lack of wetness.

Different Types Of Lube

There are different types of lube to look out for when going shopping. Look for these:

Water Based: Most lubricants on the market today are water based, such as the infamous KY Jelly. This type of lubricant is most people’s favorite because it doesn’t stain and can be used anywhere on the body even ingested in small amounts so there’s little worry when going down on a woman. Having said that, even the best water-based lubricants dry out with extended use, and some folks have developed allergies to them.
Oil Based: Oil based lubes are fantastic for anal play, because they last forever and warm to the touch. They are also lovely for body massage. The only caveats with oil-based lubricants is that they make things so slippery that condoms and dental dams can slide right off, as well as if you’re using latex based products, the oil in the lube will break the latex down.
Petroleum Based: These lubes, such as Vaseline or baby oil, are also great for anal play, but they will degrade condoms or dental dams and can potentially cause infections in a woman’s vagina so most people avoid these lubricants.
Silicone Based: It isn’t as easy to find silicone lubricants as the others, although most sex shops do carry them. They have a silky, soft feel to them and last longer than all of the other types other than oil-based. They are safe to use on all parts of the body and will not stain. However, make sure to test silicone lubricants before using them internally, as more than a few people have allergies.

Whichever lubricants you decide on with your partner, just remember to not squirt it directly on your partner. Instead, put the lubricant in your hands, rub them together a bit, and warm it before putting it wherever it is you’d like to get slippery.

Fellatio & STD’s – What You Need To Know

Michael Webb — Sat, 15 Oct 2011 17:00:11 +0000

Fellatio is less risky for STD’s than vaginal or anal sex, but is it completely risk free? Not hardly. Here’s what to watch for when giving a blowjob.

Monogamy Is Safer

It is important to note here that most monogamous couples need not worry too much about the health risks and sexually transmitted diseases that are related to fellatio. If you begin becoming sexually active (whether this includes intercourse or not is irrelevant) it is important that both partners are tested for sexually transmitted diseases. If both partners test negative and remain monogamous, unprotected fellatio can be considered a fairly safe activity. However, sexually transmitted diseases can be contracted through fellatio, so it is important to practice safer fellatio with a condom if you are sexually active with a partner that has not been tested for sexually transmitted diseases and/or is not monogamous. Non-monogamous partners should be tested for sexually transmitted diseases regularly.

Yes, The Risk Is Lower – But It’s Still Not Zero

Generally, the risk of contracting a sexually transmitted disease if you’re receiving fellatio is considered fairly low, however, unprotected fellatio (without a condom) can put the receiving partner at a low risk of Hepatitis B and C as well as HIV. The receiving partner may be at a higher risk of gonorrhea, syphilis, Chlamydia, genital herpes and genital warts and in some cases, pubic lice and scabies.

More Risk To The Giving Partner

The giving partner, however, is much more at risk than the receiving especially if she takes her partner’s ejaculate into her mouth. It is important to become familiar with the various types of sexually transmitted diseases that one can contract by giving or receiving fellatio as well as becoming familiar with the ways to have safer oral sex.

STD’s That Can Be Spread Through Fellatio

HIV and Hepatitis C – both of these sexually transmitted diseases are spread through blood to blood contact, although, HIV can also be found in other bodily fluids such as breast milk, vaginal secretions and most importantly, semen. In addition, due to eating, chewing gum, brushing their teeth and the like, many people have small cuts to the inside of their gums and cheeks that would make the perfect reception site for a particularly deadly strain of HIV or Hepatitis C. As for your partner, the chances of him contracting HIV or Hepatitis C from your mouth during fellatio is slim, but remember, if there are any abrasions in your mouth or any abrasions on his penis, that risk increases dramatically. You may not be able to see microscopic cuts or lacerations from brushing your teeth and you may not notice a tiny scrape or something similar on your partner’s penis – but HIV and Hepatitis C will notice! For the safety of both the giving and receiving partner – if you are unsure of the other’s STD status, practice safer oral sex!
Hepatitis A and B – these diseases are a little less serious than HIV and Hepatitis C, for the simple fact that both can be prevented with a vaccine and if contracted, can be treated with medication. However, care should still be taken when performing fellatio to avoid contracting these harmful sexually transmitted diseases. Hepatitis B is contracted through the same types of bodily fluids as HIV, such as vaginal fluids, semen, and breast milk. Hepatitis A can only be contracted through oral contact with feces, therefore should always be guarded against very carefully if you plan on coming into contact with your partner’s anus.
Genital and Oral Herpes – this is perhaps the most commonly spread sexually transmitted disease through oral to genital contact. That’s because there are two types of herpes – oral herpes and genital herpes. That does not, however, mean that oral herpes can only be spread by mouth to mouth contact and genital herpes can be spread by genital to genital contact. A person with an oral herpes outbreak can transmit the herpes virus from her mouth to her partner’s penis while performing fellatio and similarly, he can transmit genital herpes to her mouth in the same way. Although genital and oral herpes generally cannot be spread while there is no outbreak (that is, there are no pimples or pustules on the skin) that does not mean that this sexually transmitted disease should be taken less seriously if the infected partner does not have a breakout.
Genital Warts (Human Papillomavirus) – This particular sexually transmitted disease spreads the same way as genital herpes does and can even appear in the oral area, making it a highly contagious and serious disease when considering performing or receiving fellatio. Again, follow the same safer oral sex guidelines as genital and oral herpes – don’t perform or receive fellatio from a person showing symptoms of genital warts (small, white and cauliflower-like pustules). Bear in mind, however, that a person can carry the human papillomavirus without ever experiencing an outbreak of genital warts and as far as mucous-membrane contact is concerned, this person can still spread the disease.
Bacterial Infections (Chlamydia, Gonorrhea and Syphilis) – although it is a fairly well known fact that if caught early enough, bacterial infections such as Chlamydia, gonorrhea and syphilis can be treated and most likely cured with antibiotics, this is no reason to treat these sexually transmitted diseases less seriously than one would treat HIV or Hepatitis C. To be honest, the partner giving fellatio is more at risk for these bacterial sexually transmitted diseases because these diseases usually infect mucous membranes – meaning anywhere soft, dark and wet. Isn’t a mouth soft, dark and wet? Many of these sexually transmitted diseases bear no symptoms (especially Chlamydia) and if left untreated, they can become very serious and even deadly (in the case of syphilis). If you are performing fellatio on a partner who has not recently had an STD test or a non-monogamous partner, it is best to utilize safer oral sex practices.

Should You Have Sex Before Age 18?

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 14:00:33 +0000

Teen sex is common these days – you see it on television and in movies, you hear about teenage celebrities getting busy and kids at school are trying it too. But is it right for YOU? Should you do it, or should you wait?

Legality

Let’s face it – it’s not legal for people to have sex if they’re under the age of eighteen. You can’t buy porn or sex toys if you’re underage either. While tons of underage boys and girls still do have sex before they’re eighteen and never get caught, it’s important to know the basics of when it is actually legal for you to engage in sexual activity.

That said, if you and your partner are both underage, it becomes less of a criminal issue and more of an issue with your parents. However, if you are underage and your partner is over the age of eighteen, or vice versa, you can get into a LOT more trouble. The older person may be charged criminally if it is ever reported that you are having sex with them, and they will be required to register as a sex offender after any jail time, probation or community service that is issued.

Being registered as a sex offender will haunt them for the rest of their lives and make it difficult for them to buy a home, have a job, have children and visit their children’s schools, and even impact their ability to vote. It’s not something that goes away after a few years – it’s a lifetime of being on a list with pedophiles and rapists. Think twice about having sex you or your partner are underage!

What Are You Waiting For?

If teen sex isn’t something you want to be involved in, think about the “why.” Are you waiting for marriage? Are you waiting until the age of eighteen to do it so you or your partner don’t get into trouble? Whatever your reason for waiting is, it’s a good reason – and it’s important that you fully understand the reason why you’re waiting so you can stay strong and continue to abstain.

If you’re not “waiting” but you just haven’t had sex yet, think about some of the reasons you should wait. Are you in a serious, committed relationship? If not, perhaps you should wait until you’re in love. Think about possibly getting yourself or your partner in legal trouble, or going against your personal beliefs. There are lots of good reasons to abstain and there are many of them that will apply to you and you alone. Perhaps you don’t want to abstain until marriage, but you just want to abstain until you’re older, smarter, more confident and ready. Every reason is a good one!

Considering Consequences

No one likes to think about the consequences of teen sex, but it’s a must if you’re considering losing your virginity. Having sex is an adult activity, and if you feel like you’re adult enough to handle it, then you’re definitely adult enough to think about the possible consequences beforehand. A lot of teenagers are afraid that if they think about the consequences of teen sex before they have it, they might talk themselves out of it. That’s not necessarily a bad thing!

If you’re sure you want to do it and “being talked out of it” isn’t something you feel will happen, considering the consequences will help you effectively plan for anything that might happen as a result of your decision. Think about the possibility of getting an STD – and all the different ways that they can be transmitted – and think about what you can do to reduce your risk as well as what you’ll do in the event that it does happen. Unwanted pregnancy is similar – before you have sex, think about how you can prevent an unwanted pregnancy and how you might deal with one should it actually happen.

Staying Safe

If you’ve thought long and hard and have decided that now is the right time to have sex, take the time to look into all safety options that you have available to you – and there are a LOT! Think about going to your doctor and getting on birth control. If you’re too young to go to the doctor by yourself and can’t tell your parents that you’ve made the decision to have sex and want to get on birth control, you don’t need to be having sex.

Also, think about using condoms and spermicide. Get flavored condoms and dental dams for oral sex. Talk to your doctor about other ways you can practice safe sex. Sex isn’t fun if all you’re worried about is getting pregnant or an STD. It’s also not fun if you’re worried about your partner going to jail.

If you can’t get it on with a clear conscience, try waiting until you can!

5 Tricks To Lasting All Night Long

Isabella Stone — Fri, 22 Jul 2011 23:00:17 +0000

Premature ejaculation affects a lot of guys. Tell me if this scenario sounds familiar: you’re in bed with a girl, you’re both enjoying yourselves, and you’re about to wow her with your next move when wham! You finish early. Your girl smiles and mumbles something, and you feel like a sexual failure.

This scene is all too common, but it thankfully can be avoided next time with just a few tweaks. Use the following tips next time you feel the need to push off that inevitable moment, and last all night.

Distract Yourself

Forget the usual advice to “think about baseball.” Or Margaret Thatcher naked. You don’t want to be scared off sex forever! It may seem counter-intuitive, but the best thing to distract yourself with is how sex feels, looks, even smells and tastes.

Instead of mindlessly pumping away toward the Big O, pay attention to other things, like how soft your partner’s skin is, the curve of her neck, or the pain of her nails dragging down your back. Notice the smell of her skin and the wetness between her thighs. When you become mindful, you can last longer and enjoy the sexual experience more. What could be better than that?

Concentrate On Her Pleasure

Instead of focusing on yourself, make it all about her. Choose positions that feel best for her (trust me, she’ll let you know when you’ve hit the right spot). Pay attention to her body’s cues, and you won’t be so hung up on your own.

Women are all about foreplay, so if you can make the foreplay last a long time it won’t matter if you finish shortly after the actual sex starts because in her head it started long before the actual penetration. Once she’s had a few orgasms, keep going, and try to get a new personal “high score.” Remember, a high percentage of women are multi-orgasmic, so challenge yourself to give her more than last time! Making the experience better for her is going to not only improve your stamina but will also improve your sexual reputation.

Change Sex Positions

This is the single easiest thing you can do to avoid premature ejaculation. If you feel yourself getting a bit too heated in one position, move to a completely different one. If you are in doggy style, move to missionary. The trick is to really change it up-moving from one variation of doggie to another isn’t going to cut it. Be careful not to change sex positions too frequently, as it is going to take her out of the mood and feel more like a distraction than anything else.

Wear A Condom

First of all, you should be practicing safe sex anyway, and for most of you, that means wearing a condom. However, if you are in a long term relationship, or you’ve both been tested and she’s on the pill, condoms might not seem like a necessity. If you’re having trouble lasting, though, that little prophylactic can be a lifesaver. We all know that condoms can dull sensation? In this case, a little dulling is exactly what you need. There are plenty of good brands out there now that feel almost like you’re not wearing anything, except that little extra something can keep you lasting much longer.

Change Your Masturbation Habits

If I were to tell you to stop masturbating altogether, and you were to actually listen, your next sexual encounter would probably be record for shortest time between start and finish. I won’t tell you to stop the self-love! I will, however, let you in on a secret. When you are young and just discovering masturbation, you tend to do it fast and furiously, which made sense back then because you were trying not to get caught. Nowadays you hopefully have more leisure but probably still use the vice-grip, carpal-tunnel inducing, furious shake technique you used at 14. Stop it!

Use your self-love time to retrain your body to sustain an erection. Use the start-stop technique of backing off when you feel an orgasm coming on. Doing that a few times will not only train your penis to stay hard without cumming, it will also make the inevitable payoff mind-blowingly better than your normal orgasm.

This technique also translates well to the bedroom. Slow down every time you’re on the verge and by the time you do climax the release will be incredible.

Being an amazing lover isn’t all about lasting longer in bed, but using these tricks to make yourself last longer can have the effect of making you a better lover. With just a few simple tweaks to your technique, you can improve your stamina, keep going all night long, and make yourself seem like a sex god in her eyes. It’s a win-win for both of you.

Dating Advice: Tips For The First Night Together

Andrew Wang — Sat, 09 Jul 2011 23:00:30 +0000

Dating will inevitably lead to sex. Here’s how you can make your dating efforts worthwhile and not send your lover running as soon as they walk in the door.

The First Sleepover

You’ve been on a few dates and things are going well, and then your date invites you over for dinner at their place. This can only mean one thing—tonight’s the night you’ll be sleeping over. Whether your place or your partner’s place will be the setting for the main event, there are ways to be better prepared for your romantic sleepover. Just a little advance planning will go a long way toward making sure your overnight experience is a great one.

Stock The Kitchen

Whether you’re hosting the night or your S.O. is, the key to a great sleep over is making sure that you don’t need to leave the apartment or house for anything. If things will be taking place at your apartment or house, you need to make sure that you’ve got food and drink covered for both dinner and breakfast. Get whatever you need for the meals you intend to make, plus some fruit and a snack like nuts or popcorn to have on hand.

Having at least one bottle of wine and a six pack of beer is a good idea, too—that way you have a couple of options in case you don’t like drinking the same thing on the date as your lover. You get extra points if you stock your kitchen with a snack or drink that you know he/she is a big fan of.

Clean The Place Up

If you don’t have time to truly clean your place, at least pick up any clutter and clean the bathroom. Slobs, take note—most people will be grossed out if your bathroom hasn’t been cleaned in over a week. Also be sure to have plenty of toothpaste and hand soap available, along with clean towels. Your date probably won’t be bringing an overnight bag, so it helps to think of what they might need and have it handy.

Throw a new toothbrush in the drawer so they can use it. Just tell them you always keep an extra on hand so they don’t think you thought that sex would be a sure thing. Make sure to make the bed, too, preferably with clean or fairly clean (no more than a couple of days old) sheets. Since you’ll hopefully be heading there sooner in the night rather than later, you want to make sure your bedroom looks nice and inviting. You can go all out with candles and flowers and music, but that isn’t necessary. Some people might even be intimidated by that. As long as the bedroom looks cozy and clean, you’ll be fine.

Pack Appropriately

If you’re the person heading over to your significant other’s place, try to think ahead for what you’ll need to sleep over. Since it’s your first time spending the night together, you can’t really bring over a backpack full of clothes and toiletries. That would look too presumptuous, and if you don’t end up staying the night, you’ll feel silly.

Girls are luckier here, because they usually have a purse on them. If you’re a guy and you’re coming straight from work, you can bring your briefcase or bag and hide some necessities in there. Otherwise, stick with what will fit in your pockets. If you can fit a toothbrush and floss in your bag or pocket, do so. Better still, pack a spare pair of underwear, too.

Since you’ll have to change into your same clothes the following day, having those clean undies will make you feel at least a little fresher. Another thing that always helps is deodorant. You could just sneak some of your date’s, but unless they use unscented or you’re both the same gender, you’ll come out smelling like the opposite sex. Better to bring your own if possible.

You should also consider bringing over a bottle of wine or something else to drink. Even if your mate already has beverages at his or her place, it can’t hurt to have a little more. That means there’s no risk that you’ll run out and have to make a late night wine and liquor store run. Plus, it makes for a nice host or hostess gift to thank them for having you over and cooking for you. Flowers never hurt, either.

Practice Safe Sex

There is one more thing that you need to stock up on, whether you’re the host or the invitee—birth control. Never, ever assume that your date will be supplying proper protection. Better that you both show up with a handful condoms than neither of you do. Nothing ruins the moment faster than realizing that one of you is going to have to go pick something up from the drug store. Plus, you don’t want to be tempted to forego using birth control out of convenience.

If you’re a girl and on the pill, make sure you put your pill pack in your purse. Whether you also use condoms or not, you wouldn’t want to miss your regular dose and throw yourself off. Being prepared with birth control is as important, if not more, as prepping all of the other aforementioned things. It takes the pressure off and lets you enjoy your first night together to the fullest.

Will A Condom Break If You Have Sex In A Hot Tub?

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 17 Jun 2011 14:00:38 +0000

Sex in a hot tub can be super fun, but sex that’s not safe isn’t. You can have a lot more fun if you know that you’re protected from sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancy. Condoms are your best bet for safe sex, but can you use one in the water or will it get damaged?

Question: I’ve been a loyal fan of your YouTube channel for ages now and my girl and I were thinking about having sex in a hot tub. I was wondering if wearing a condom while in the water would cause it to bust or would we encounter any other problems? Thanks for taking time to read my question!

–YouTube Viewer

Water Is Not A Lubricant

Many people think that if you’re having sex in the water that you don’t need lube, however, quite the opposite is true and especially if you’re using a condom. Water isn’t going to provide enough lubrication inside a woman’s vaginal canal, and if she’s too dry and there is too much friction, it can easily be damaged.

Use a thicker, water or silicone based lube when you’re doing it in the tub or when you’re having sex in the shower, lake or pool. You might be tempted to use an oil based lubricant because you know that oil is resistant to water, however, oil based lube is definitely not compatible with any kind of latex condom. You can use oil based lube with a polyurethane condom, but unless you have a latex allergy and can’t wear regular prophylactics, latex is your best bet for the most comfort and the tightest fit.

You don’t have to use a whole lot of lubricant when you’re getting it on where it’s already wet, but a condom isn’t going to do you any good if there’s so much friction that it busts. A little lube goes a long way here!

Chlorine And Heat Can Affect The Latex

Even if you use a good lubricant during sex in the tub, the heat and chlorine in the tub alone can cause the latex to deteriorate. You may want to try different sex positions in the tub that keep your penis mostly out of the water, such as doggy style with her propped up on the ledge of the tub.

If you’re concerned about the chemicals in the tub affecting a condom, try reducing the amount of chlorine additives you put in. Test the pH regularly to make sure that you’re adding enough, but try to get by with as little as possible. You may also want to turn the heat down some – the hotter it is, the more risk you may be taking that the material will become damaged and disintegrate.

Avoid Oils

Oil is another component that causes latex to disintegrate, and surprisingly enough, there are often oils found in the water of a Jacuzzi. This is because people with suntan oils or sunscreen on their skin will get in the tub, and some of it will come off while they’re soaking. Some bubble baths or additives can also contain oils, so be careful of what you put into your tub.

Don’t Put The Condom On While In The Water

If you plan on wearing a condom while you’re having sex in a hot tub, make sure you put it on first, before you get into the water. This is because if you accidentally get liquid inside the rubber while putting it on – which CAN happen no matter how careful you think you’re being – it can bust or slide off when you’re having sex.

Remember That No Method Is Perfect

Safe sex is all about reducing your risk of contracting STD’s or getting pregnant – there’s no true way to completely eliminate your risk without giving up sex entirely. Abstinence is the only true 100% safe “sex.” That said, understand that you’re taking a risk when you’re having sex at all, whether it be in a bed, a shower, the car or a Jacuzzi.

Using condoms during sex regardless of where you do it at is a lot safer than not using one at all. This is true for sex in the Jacuzzi also – even though oils and chlorine in the water may cause the latex to disintegrate or liquid may get in it and cause it to slip off – you’re still a LOT better off if you’re using a condom than if you don’t.

Sex Toys: How To Keep Them Clean And Safe

Kaylen Jackson — Thu, 16 Jun 2011 14:00:28 +0000

Sex toys can get nasty if you don’t take care of them and keep them clean. Also, some sex toys contain harmful chemicals. Here’s how to keep your favorites like new – and safe for you!

What Are Phthalates?

You may have heard of phthalates – these are dangerous chemicals that can be found in some rubbers and plastics that have been shown to be carcinogenic (cancer causing). Some sex toys also have phthalates in them, namely products that are made of jelly rubber. If you’ve ever opened a brand new product and it smelled of chemicals or had a strong plastic smell, you were probably smelling the phthalates in the rubber.

Does My Sex Toy Have Phthalates?

Most hard plastic vibrators and the like do not contain phthalates, and some jelly feeling products are made from silicone, so the only way to know for sure is to read the packaging and manual that came with your product and find out what it is made of. Some sex toys that do have phthalates aren’t going to necessarily advertise that they do, so if you suspect that your product does contain these chemicals and there’s no information in the packaging to suggest otherwise, you’ll want to assume that it does and take measures to stay safe.

If you’re purchasing a new sex toy or selecting your first one, finding one that is made without phthalates is actually very easy. Glass sex toys, hard plastic vibrators, wood, ceramic, metal and silicone sex toys are all phthalate free. A simple Internet search will reveal tons of phthalate free products for you to choose from.

Using A Condom With Your Vibrator

It’s a huge bummer to find out that your favorite sex toy is made with phthalates. It’s given you orgasm after orgasm and it works like a charm – but should you throw it out? Perhaps, but you don’t necessarily have to. Most people don’t think to use condoms during masturbation – since you’re not really risking getting pregnant or contracting STD’s – but condoms can actually help protect you from dangerous chemicals found in some sex toys.

The next time you’re getting ready to use your vibrator or dildo, slip a condom over it before inserting it into your vagina. This will help protect the delicate tissues inside the vagina from the chemicals. However, using a condom won’t protect you from any phthalates that are on the outside of the toy. For example, if you own a rabbit style vibrator, you can slip a condom over the dildo part of the toy, but you will still remain unprotected from the jelly covering on the vibrating clitoris attachment. All in all though, using a condom with sex toys that you suspect may contain dangerous phthalates significantly reduces your risk.

Using The Right Kind Of Lube

Not all lubricants are compatible with all sex toys. If you’re using the wrong lubricant with your products, you’re going to find that they degrade faster or become sticky, tacky or unusable in just a short amount of time. Finding the right lube to use with your product is essential if you want it to last longer.

Silicone: Silicone sex toys cannot be used with silicone lube. This will cause the material to degrade.

Hard Plastic: Can be used with any type of lube.

Wood: Can be used with any type of lube.

Latex: Cannot be used with oil based lube. Similarly, condoms cannot be used with oil based lube either.

Ceramic & Glass: Can be used with any type of lube.

Jelly Rubber: Best with water based lube, since jelly rubber can contain elements of latex and silicone.

In truth, water based lubricant is probably your best bet for any kind of sex toys. You don’t have to worry about buying different types of lube that are compatible with all your different kinds of products if you’re using a good water based lube. Water based lube is also a breeze to rinse off, unlike silicone or oil based lubricants.

Cleanup & Storage

When you’re using a condom with your sex toys, you can pretty much slip the condom off and store it right then and there. You might have to wipe it down some if things got really wild, but using a condom during masturbation actually helps make clean up faster.

If you’re not using a condom with your product, read the instructions to find out the manufacturer’s suggested cleaning methods. Most hard plastic toys can be wiped down with a damp cloth, while jelly rubber or latex products probably need a good soap and water bath to feel really clean.

You’ll always want to clean your products immediately after use. Sure, you may be spent after an incredible orgasm, however, you definitely don’t want to leave your toy sitting there for any length of time. This will cause it to grow bacteria and many sex toys are porous – meaning that the bacteria will actually absorb into the material of the product. This means your toys will retain odor and may never feel really “clean” again. Be safe and clean your products as soon as you’re done.

Oral Sex – Do You Need A Condom And Can You Get An STD?

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 05 Jun 2011 14:00:41 +0000

Oral sex isn’t something that makes you think of STD’s automatically – you’ve probably heard that the greatest risk for transmitting sexual infections such as HIV, AIDS, chlamydia and syphilis come from anal sex and vaginal intercourse. But can STD’s be transmitted through mouth to genital sex? What do you need to do to protect yourself?

Question: Dear Dan and Jenn, I am still young and recently had the “talk” and my parents told me to navigate to this channel. Do you have any tips for a person new to the sex world? Also, I was still confused about oral sex and didn’t want to ask my parents. Do you still need a condom and can you get a STD?

–YouTube Viewer

Remember That You Can Only Eliminate Risk Through Abstinence

No matter what kind of sex you’re talking about – whether it’s oral sex, vaginal sex, anal sex or even giving your partner a handjob or fingering them – you’re never 100% safe from sexually transmitted diseases. Even if you use spermicide, condoms or the withdrawal method, there is nothing you can do short of abstinence to completely eliminate your risk. If you’re engaging in any kind of sexual activity whatsoever with another person, you are putting yourself at risk of getting STD’s.

That said, there are lots of ways you can safely and easily reduce your risk – and be fairly confident that you’re not going to contract an STD. First of all, being in a monogamous relationship with someone who has been tested for and is free from STD’s is a start. If you have multiple sexual partners, condoms are your best asset as far as safety during sex is concerned.

Yes, Oral Sex Can Transmit STD’s

Generally speaking, the risk for spreading sexually transmitted diseases through mouth to genital sex is much less than the risk of spreading them through anal sex or vaginal intercourse. However, there is still a risk there, because STD’s like AIDS and HIV are found in vaginal fluid, pre-cum and semen. Don’t assume that just because your partner doesn’t “ejaculate” in your mouth that you are safe from STD’s.

If you have a sore or cut on your mouth before giving someone cunnilingus or fellatio, your risk of getting an STD multiplies by quite a bit. Hepatitis C, HIV and AIDS are spread easily through blood contact, even semen or precum to blood – which is the case if you have a cut or sore on or around your mouth.

You may not even know you have a cut or sore in your mouth – many times, people have small lacerations on their gums from brushing their teeth and if your gums bleed when you brush your teeth, you can be pretty certain that you have an “open wound” in your mouth all the time, at least when it comes to talking about the transmission of STD’s.

Your Risk Of Contracting An STD During Oral Sex Varies

There’s no sure way of determining how high your risk of getting a sexually transmitted disease through fellatio or cunnilingus is, because it varies. For example, pre-cum has a lower concentration of virus than semen or blood does, and if a woman infected with the HIV, Hepatitis C or AIDS virus and is on her period, she is much more likely to transmit the disease to her partner during sex.

Because how high the risk is depends on so many different factors, there’s no way to accurately say that you’re going to be safe from getting an STD during fellatio or cunnilingus without a condom.

It’s Not Just AIDS Or HIV That Can Be Spread

While HIV and AIDS are probably the most worrisome of viruses that you can contract from mouth to genital sex, they’re not the only ones. There are lots of different sexually transmitted diseases and infections:

Chlamydia
Hepatitis C
Gonorrhea
Syphilis
Herpes
Pubic Lice
Genital Warts
HPV
Hepatitis B

That’s a pretty long list – and while some of these diseases can be treated with antibiotics, others can’t and some can even contribute to throat and mouth cancers later on in life. Furthermore, be aware of the fact that you may not know someone has an STD – in fact, they may not even know it. They may not be displaying any symptoms at all, so it’s best to be safe and assume that you have a risk of contracting any of these diseases through oral sex at any time.

Using A Condom Or A Dental Dam During Oral Sex Will Greatly Reduce Your Risk

If you want to reduce your risk of getting an STD during fellatio or cunnilingus, using a condom or a dental dam will make it much less likely that you would take anything home that you didn’t want to. Here are some tips on how to make yourself safer when giving (or receiving):

Wear a condom. Try flavored condoms or a flavored lube to make things taste better (and they smell great) and definitely avoid condoms that have spermicide on them.
For cunnilingus, make sure that you use a dental dam. If you place a dab of lube underneath the dental dam on the clitoris and vulva, it will create real feeling sensations that are just as good – if not better – than unprotected fellatio or cunnilingus.
Don’t use oil based lubricant at all. Oil based lubes will break down the latex and make the condom pretty much pointless.
Get a fresh condom after anal sex or vaginal sex if you’re going to have mouth to genital sex. You don’t want to be using the same condom for fellatio as you did for vaginal or anal sex. Not only does that make the condom less effective, it’s a great way to spread lots of harmful bacteria.
If you don’t have a dental dam on hand for cunnilingus, you can do one of two things. You can use a nice, large square of plastic food wrap, or you can cut a condom lengthwise and spread it out over the vulva. Either way is better and safer than using nothing at all.

Viagra Condom: What Is It And Where Can I Get One?

Kaylen Jackson — Thu, 12 May 2011 14:00:38 +0000

Viagra has long been touted as the cure for erectile dysfunction – just one pill can give you a raging hard on that lasts for hours. But as with any medication, there are reported side effects (notably an erection that lasts more than four hours – which requires immediate medical attention) and it’s not for everyone. Alternatives to Viagra are cropping up everywhere, from herbal pills to creams and jellies. But can you actually achieve a bigger, better erection with just a condom?

What Is A “Viagra” Condom?

A new condom is being tested in the UK that is lined with a gel that is designed to stimulate blood flow to the penis and result in better, longer and harder erections. This same gel is used in patients with angina and other heart problems to improve blood flow to the heart. By using the gel in a condom, it is believed that the vasodilating components in the gel will increase the blood flow directly in the penis.

Contrary to popular belief, the “Viagra” condom is actually not affiliated at all with the company that manufactures Viagra. The condom was only coined with this term due to the possibility that it will give a man a rock hard erection while using it.

Will It Cure Erectile Dysfunction?

If you’re with a monogamous partner, you may not want to use a condom in a situation like this, especially if you and your partner are using different forms of birth control or are trying to get pregnant. There are lots of effective treatments for erectile dysfunction for those who are in partnerships or marriages and don’t require the use of a condom. For this reason, the condom is not being marketed as a treatment for erectile dysfunction only, but rather at men who don’t like wearing condoms.

Improving The Desire To Use Contraception

Instead of aiming the product towards men with erectile dysfunction, it is being marketed towards men who don’t enjoy wearing condoms. Many men report that an erection is difficult to get or maintain when wearing a condom, because sexual sensitivity is reduced even in thinner condoms. A lot of men choose not to use them for this reason alone. The UK company creating the “Viagra” condoms reports that if men had more of an incentive to use a condom – such as not having any erection problems during use – they would be more likely to choose safer sex over going bareback.

Some men experience impotency only occasionally (and in some cases, men experience only a single episode of ED or have episodes very rarely), so conventional treatments for ED may not work well for these men. A “Viagra” condom would be an effective way to treat ED that happens only occasionally, rather than seeking the aid of systemic medications that have a number of side effects.

Are They Available In The U.S.?

Right now, these condoms are being tested in the UK and they are expected to pass regulatory inspections and be manufactured in the UK within the next year. At present, scientists are working on stabilizing the gel within the condom so that it only touches the penis during sex. They also want to make sure the gel doesn’t break down or degrade latex, making the condom ineffective.

However, if these condoms work well and are readily accepted by the public, it won’t be long before they’re introduced in the United States and are available for purchase anywhere regular condoms are sold.

Other Treatments For ED

Erectile dysfunction is common in the United States and can happen to men of any age – although older men tend to experience this more than younger men. There are a variety of treatments for ED, including:

Herbal supplements
Viagra or Cialis
Creams and gels
Penis pumps
Surgery (in very rare cases)

However, if you struggle with erection problems, all you may need to do is live a healthier lifestyle. ED can be caused by a variety of things, including smoking, heart disease, diabetes and high blood pressure, using illegal drugs or some prescription medications, and not eating healthy, vitamin rich foods.

By making a few simple lifestyle changes such as eliminating smoking or using drugs and exercising and eating healthier, you may be able to conquer erectile dysfunction without the need for medical intervention, medications and supplements.

11 Surprising Ways To Have Incredible Sex

Kaylen Jackson — Wed, 04 May 2011 14:00:26 +0000

Incredible sex doesn’t have to be something you once had at the beginning of your relationship. It’s common for sex to become blase as you and your partner become more comfortable with each other, however, that doesn’t mean you have to resign yourself to mediocre sex for the rest of your relationship. Here’s how you can make sex great with these unconventional techniques.

Experiment With Condoms

Condoms are essential if you and your partner aren’t monogamous with each other, aren’t sure of each other’s sexual pasts or haven’t been tested for STD’s. However, most couples who have been tested or are in a monogamous relationship forgo using condoms, especially if they’re using birth control to prevent unwanted pregnancy. But did you know that condoms can sometimes enhance your sex life, even if you don’t need them? Condoms are great for anal sex, because you can just slip it off before engaging in vaginal penetration. If you experiment with different brands and styles of condoms, like ribbed and studded or twisted, you may find something that actually helps stimulate your g-spot and makes it easier for you to have an orgasm!

Wear Socks During Sex

Sure, socks aren’t sexy and most men and women only wear them to bed if they’re not planning on having sex that night. But did you know that if a woman’s feet are warm, she is 30% more likely to have an orgasm? Next time you get it on with your lover – especially if you have trouble reaching the big “O” – try donning a nice, plush pair of socks on your feet before you crawl in between the sheets. You might be surprised at how much better it can be!

Try Dirty Talk

A lot of women are too shy to try dirty talk, but there is definitely a correlation between dirty talk and absolutely explosive sex. If you’re not comfortable with dirty talk, start slow and work your way up to it. Start by simply vocalizing your pleasure when you feel something good, especially if your partner is doing something special to you like giving you oral sex. Next, start describing how much you like what he’s doing and then move on to telling him what you’d like to do next. Dirty talk doesn’t necessarily mean that you have to be vulgar – it can be as simple as tell your partner what you like and how much you like it.

Start Sexting

Like dirty talk, sexting can drastically improve the quality of your sex life with your partner. While you’re at work or school, send your lover a naughty text that describes what you want to do when you get home that night. It will spark their imagination and get them thinking about you all day. When you finally do get home, it’s going to be all you can do not to tear each other’s clothes off as soon as you walk through the door!

Learn To Striptease

Men are visual creatures. They love watching women, especially naked women. The love dancing naked women even more! There’s a reason that strip clubs are so popular, but most women don’t like their guys going out and ogling other women. You can solve that problem in a heartbeat by learning to perform a striptease yourself! Don’t worry about not being a good dancer or not knowing what you’re doing – your man doesn’t care. Slip on some really great lingerie (a garter belt with thigh highs is a must) and do a sexy little dance for him. Chances are, you won’t be dancing for that long anyway.

Eat Celery

You wouldn’t think that celery would boost your libido, but it most certainly does. Celery contains a steroid called androstenone, which is also found in human sweat. This is one of the components of human pheromones that help attract men and women to each other. Eating celery will increase the presence of the steroid in humans and increase pheromone production – making people much more attracted to each other. Not only will it increase pheromone production, celery will also increase the amount of ejaculatory fluids in both men and women so orgasms will be more powerful and more pleasurable.

Take The BSPI Test

The BSPI Test (called the Beiter Sexuality Preference Indicator) is a test that can accurately determine what your true sexual preferences are through both direct questions and questions that are designed to access your subconscious. Knowing your sexual preferences – what you like and what you don’t like – can help you better communicate what you want in the bedroom to your partner. You can also have your partner take the test to see if you’re sexually compatible!

Get Sexy

Women feel sexier when they get their bodies ready for sex. Sure, shaving may not seem like a very erotic act, but getting ready for sex by primping will actually make a woman feel more like getting busy than if she hadn’t done any primping at all. So next time you’re thinking about hitting the sheets with your partner, take twenty minutes to shave your legs (or other parts of your body if you like), put on a little lip gloss and fluff your hair. If you’re feeling like you’re looking good, you’re going to be much more receptive to having sex.

Bake A Pumpkin Pie (Or Burn A Lavender Candle)

We all know that scent plays a very powerful role in arousal, but many women (and men) aren’t sure what scents and aphrodisiacs will turn their partners on the most. Women respond best to the smells of vanilla and fresh cut grass, while men respond best to the smell of lavender or pumpkin pie. Next time you want to turn your man on, burn a lavender candle and slip into a bubble bath or bake a fresh pumpkin pie right before he comes home from work. He won’t know that the smell of pumpkin pie is what made him want to jump your bones as soon as he walked in the door, but you will!

Assign Him Chores

While men get turned on by a naked woman, women actually get turned on when men do chores! A woman will get much more turned on by a man in a work uniform covered in grease who has just changed the oil in the car than she will by a man who is primped, shaven and naked. If you want to give your libido a boost and become more attracted to your man, ask him to do something really “manly” like fix the leaky pipe or lift something really, really heavy. Even if you can do these things yourself, you’ll be much more attracted to him if he does it.

Take Some Zinc

Zinc is a great supplement to take when you have a cold or the flu because it can help you get over it faster, but did you also know that zinc will help boost your man’s libido? Zinc is essential for testosterone health and will raise a man’s energy levels and increase their desire for sex. Oysters have gotten their reputation for being an aphrodisiac most likely because they are one of the foods that are highest in zinc! Next time you want your man to really want you, feed him some oysters or just have him take a zinc supplement!

10 Things You Didn’t Know About Penises

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 03 May 2011 14:00:02 +0000

Sex is something most people are familiar with, but there are many things that remain unknown. With myths and gossip constantly surrounding sex and different sexual activities, it can be difficult to sort out the truth from the bunk. Perhaps one of the most misunderstood things about sex is the penis – due to the numerous jokes gossip about it, there’s a lot of things that women just don’t know about it – but should.

The Penis CAN Break

Believe it or not, even though the penis isn’t a bone, it can break. A “break” is most often called a “penile fracture” and can happen during rough sex or even vigorous masturbation. A penile fracture happens when the tough, fibrous tissue around the penis experiences sudden trauma, and a cracking sound is often heard – along with immediately losing the erection and a large bruise appearing very quickly. This condition requires immediate medical treatment.

Erections Can Be Random

Most of the time, an erection happens when the penis is either physically stimulated or a man becomes psychologically aroused. However, erections can be completely random and can happen when a man is being neither physically or psychologically stimulated sexually. As embarrassing as it is, a man can have an erection at the most inopportune times, such as at a funeral. The next time your man pops a boner, it may not be because the hot girl you thought he was looking at – it might be “just because!”

The Average Penis Size Is Actually Quite Small

Men are obsessed with their penis size – they usually think that theirs is too small, or much smaller than the general populations. The truth is, the average size is just 5-6″ in length! While many men may think that they can’t please a woman with a 5″ penis, the reality is that they can – and the majority of men do! Large penises are actually fairly rare, and size really isn’t that big a deal to a woman. The man who holds the record for the largest penis (over 13″) lives at home with his mother – so really, size doesn’t matter.

The Way It Looks Is Not Genetic

A man may think that he passes on the size of his penis and the way it looks to his sons, but the way it looks and even how long or wide it is has nothing to do with the way his father’s looks. A man’s penis is formed within the womb, when the body begins turning an androgynous fetus into either a boy or girl. Similarly, the way a woman’s vagina looks has nothing to do with the way her mother’s looked either.

Most Men Do Not Need Large Sized Condoms

Because the average penis size is about 5 to 6 inches, most men do not need large or “Magnum” sized condoms. However, many men buy large condoms because they either want to think they have a bigger one or they want their partner to believe that they do because they brought extra large condoms to bed. The truth is, the far majority of men can fit just fine in a regular sized condom and if they do, they should use it. Using a condom that is too large can cause it to slip off, increasing the risk of unwanted pregnancy or the transmission of STD’s.

He’s Not Lying About “Blue Balls”

Most women think that the excuse men give about having “blue balls” if she doesn’t have sex with him is false – he’s just trying to get a piece, right? Wrong. However, during foreplay and increased arousal, the prostate gland and the testicles become swollen with fluid. This causes anywhere from mild discomfort to acute pain. The release of these fluids during an orgasm will relieve the discomfort. So should you sleep with him just because he has blue balls? Of course not – unless you want to. Blue balls can also be relieved with an aspirin or just good old fashioned masturbation.

You Cannot Tell The Size Of A Man’s Penis By His Shoe – Or Hand – Size

Many men and women believe that if a man has large feet or large hands with long fingers, that he will also have a very large or long penis. This is not true! However, you can predict the length of a man’s penis by looking at how tall he is. Men who are taller tend to have larger penises. Also, a study in 1999 proved that gay men actually have longer, thicker members than heterosexual men!

“Liquor Dick” Exists

If a man drinks too much, he may have trouble having an erection later that night. The same goes for illicit drug use. The more inebriated a man is, the more trouble he will have achieving an erection. If you’re planning a big date that you want to end in the bedroom with some really hot and wild sex, keep the drinks at a minimum.

Erect Penis Size Is Not Indicated By How Big It Is When It Is Not Erect

If a man has a small penis when he is not erect, many men and women think that this is an indicator that it won’t get a lot bigger when it becomes erect. Similarly, people also believe that if a man has a large member when it is flaccid that he will have a much larger penis when it is erect. The truth is, how large or small a man’s penis is when it is soft has absolutely no correlation on how big it will be when he has an erection. The average length of a flaccid one is about 3 inches, but some of these penises grow to be much larger when a man becomes sexually aroused. On the other hand, a member that is very large when it is flaccid may only gain a few centimeters when it becomes erect.

Most Men Are Uncircumcised (But Not In The U.S.)

Circumcision is still routinely practiced in the United States, where about 60% of boys are circumcised at birth due to religious and personal reasons. However, most men in the world remain uncircumcised - in fact, the rate of circumcision around the world is only 10-15%. If you meet a really hot foreign guy and end up in bed together, don’t be surprised if he’s uncut. American women think that being circumcised is the norm (and may even be a little unnerved about having sex with a man who hasn’t been circumcised), but in reality, the majority of men around the world haven’t been snipped or clipped.

Anal Sex, Enemas & Colonics – What You Need To Know

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 26 Apr 2011 14:00:10 +0000

Anal sex always looks so clean in porn films – but you know from what comes out of there, it can’t be that clean, right? Well, it can be if you do a little preparation beforehand. Make anal sex cleaner with an enema or a colonic, but be careful – you can do more harm than good if you don’t research what you’re doing thoroughly before you do it. Here’s what you need to know about enemas and colonics, before you get started!

If You Play In The Mud, You Might Get Dirty

The hard truth about anal sex is that you can get dirty doing it – quite literally. The anus is designed to excrete fecal matter, and during anal sex (either with a penis or with a sex toy), fecal matter can get on you and your partner during thrusting. Unfortunately, there are very few ways around this and if you have watched a lot of porn that features anal play, you may have gotten the illusion that anal sex is clean when it really isn’t.

Why Don’t Porn Flicks Ever Show Feces?

Unless it’s a really, let’s say interesting fetish film, a porn isn’t going to show fecal matter on camera during any kind of anal play, whether it be penetration, fingering or analingus. Why is this? How do porn directors and actors show perfectly clean anal sex when we all know very well that it can get very, very dirty? Most porn stars do a little preparation before a shoot to make sure their intestinal tract is completely cleaned out. They often use an enema or a colonic to clean themselves out, so everything stays clean during filming.

What Is An Enema?

An enema is a procedure that involves squirting liquid up the rectum and into the bowels to stimulate them to excrete waste rapidly. Most of the time, only plain water is used during this procedure but other concoctions can be used as well, such as saline. This procedure is often used to clear the lower part of the intestinal tract for medical procedures or in cases of constipation, but it is also a popular way to get ready for anal sex since an enema can usually be performed at home.

What Is A Colonic?

A colonic is similar to an enema because it does involve pumping liquid into the rectum, but during this procedure, the liquid and the fecal matter are physically removed from the bowels using a tube. This is a much deeper, more thorough cleaning of the colon and intestinal tract, but it must be performed in a physician’s office by a licensed practitioner – this is not something you can do at home! It is also not recommended that you have this done right before having sex. An enema cleans only the lower part of the colon, but a colonic actually goes in quite a bit further to get rid of more waste.

Should You Use Either Procedure Before Anal Sex?

Deciding whether or not to use an enema or a colonic to get ready for anal sex is entirely up to you. It’s all about the personal preferences of you and your sexual partner(s). If they don’t mind a little fecal matter here and there and you don’t either, don’t worry about it.

You don’t have to put yourself through uncomfortable and possibly very expensive procedures to get ready for anal play if you and your partner really don’t care one way or the other! Remember that if you do choose to have an enema or a colonic done, you need to follow all directions to make sure you don’t do more harm than good.

Alternatives To These Procedures

If you want anal sex to be clean but the idea of having an enema or a colonic really freaks you out, you’re not at the end of the road. There are other ways you can clean yourself out too!

Go to the bathroom before sex. If you haven’t eaten a heavy meal, this may be all you need to get sparkling clean for your partner.
Wear a condom. This way, your partner doesn’t get fecal matter on his penis but you can both enjoy having anal sex. The condom slips right off and can be thrown in the trash without another glance.
Use an at home laxative. There are lots of over the counter laxatives that are available and can be used easily at home if you follow all the directions.
Use lube. With anal sex, lube is a must. The delicate tissues of the anus can tear and bleed if lube isn’t used. Don’t risk it! Lube is cheap and easy to get. There’s no reason not to!

What To Keep In Mind – And In Your Purse – If You’re Single

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 18 Jan 2011 14:00:00 +0000

Safe sex is the best kind of sex, especially if you’re single. Many single women aren’t ready to get pregnant and have a baby, and nobody wants to contract a sexually transmitted disease or infection like chlamydia or HIV and AIDS. If safety is on your checklist for great sex, here are some things you may want to keep in your purse in case you get caught in an an impromptu situation and want the freedom to have safe sex if you’d like to.

Condoms

Keeping condoms in your purse may seem like a no-brainer, but many women end up getting caught in impromptu sex situations unprepared. Condoms protect against pregnancy and most STD’s. Although condoms aren’t foolproof, they’re the best sex accessory if you want to have fun and safe sex without having to worry about getting pregnant when you’re not ready or contracting a sexually transmitted disease or infection that is at best inconvenient and at worst life threatening. You may also want to keep flavored condoms in your purse in the event of oral sex. When keeping condoms in your purse, don’t throw them in there unless they’re in a protective sleeve or case first. Putting condoms in your purse loose can cause the wrapper or condom to get holes in it when all of the stuff in your purse bounces around during daily use. Guys shouldn’t put condoms in their wallet, because this can cause condoms to break down faster due to temperature issues. Condoms should be kept clean and dry and at room temperature to stay effective. Always inspect the wrapper first to check for holes or damage, and make sure you check the expiration date if you’ve had it for awhile.

Spermicide

Some couples don’t like using spermicide for pregnancy protection, but it can be an excellent option if you’re with an STD free partner and don’t want to use condoms, but still want protection from unplanned and unwanted pregnancy. Spermicide is also a great option for women or couples who want another layer of protection in addition to condoms or birth control – or both. Spermicides come in many different forms, some that are more convenient than others. Contraceptive foam is the least expensive, but may burn or cause discomfort for you or your sex partner. Suppositories are good options because they are small and easy to carry, but your partner will most likely know that you’ve used spermicide. The newest type of spermicide on the market is a contraceptive film. It is a thin, clear square that looks like plastic and is folded up and placed in the vagina behind the cervix. It takes about ten to fifteen minutes, but the film will “melt” and create a gel-like barrier of spermicide in front of the cervix. They can be kept in a purse or wallet and can be used discreetly without your partner knowing you’ve used it.

Birth Control

If you’d like to take pregnancy protection into your own hands, consider going on birth control if you’re not already on it. Talk to your doctor about the right kind of birth control for you and how to take it so it is most effective against unplanned pregnancies. Birth control doesn’t protect against STD’s, so if you’re with a new partner, make sure you’re using a condom as well. Plan-B, or emergency contraception, is a good thing to keep on hand as well, in case a condom breaks or you miss too many birth control pills.

Dental Dam

A dental dam is a small square of latex or plastic that is laid over the vagina during cunnilingus to prevent the transmission of sexually transmitted diseases. Contrary to popular belief, there are many STD’s that can be transmitted through oral sex on a woman including chlamydia and yeast infections. Keeping a dental dam in your purse will ensure that you’ve got it if you need it – for example, you’d like a new partner to perform oral sex on you but he won’t do so without the necessary safe sex tools. Many women believe that using a dental dam is less pleasurable than feeling the tongue itself, but you can closely mimic this feeling by putting a dab of lube underneath the dental dam, in between the latex and the clitoris. This allows the dental dam to slide around on the vagina, much like a tongue or mouth would. Many dental dams come in flavors, making it much much more pleasurable for the partner giving the oral sex.

Q&A: Condoms – What Size Do I Need?

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 21 Nov 2010 14:00:19 +0000

Condom shopping isn’t always easy because condoms come in a variety of different shapes and sizes. Condom sizes also differ from manufacturer to manufacturer, so it can be difficult to determine the best size for you in a particular brand. Getting the right size for you is important, because an ill fitting condom can reduce pleasurable sensations during sex at best or slip off and increase the risk of transmitting STD’s and unwanted pregnancy. Here’s how to find out what size YOU need!

Question: According to a condom size chart I’m 5 inches long erect. What condom size do I need?

–YouTube Viewer

Basic Condom Size Guidelines

If you look on the back of a condom box, each manufacturer provides basic guidelines on how large a condom is, in both length and width. You’ll also be able to find out what material it is made from and whether it comes lubricated or not. They may also provide information on how thick it is, so you can choose the thickness that provides the best and most pleasurable sensations. Most people will choose the thinnest condom that is available because this tends to allow both partners to feel more friction than their thicker counterparts. While getting a thin condom may help make sex better for you and your partner, it is much more important that you get the correct size, as this will make the biggest difference. Looking at the manufacturer’s specifications will give you a general idea of how large it is, and you can compare it to how large your penis is after you’ve measured it. Like most things though, the size of a condom will differ somewhat between manufacturers. An XL in one brand is not going to fit the same as an XL in another brand. Accurately measuring your penis and purchasing the correct size for it is an important part of having safer sex and preventing sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies.

Making Sure The Condom Fits Comfortably

When a condom is stretched lengthwise, it is much more stretchy and resilient than if it is stretched widthwise. Keep this in mind when going shopping – unless you have a very long penis, you’ll want to judge it mostly by its width, since there won’t be much give in that respect. You will be much more comfortable in one that fits the width of your penis properly! A condom that fits well lengthwise should actually be a little longer than your penis, with enough space at the tip to hold your semen when you orgasm. A condom that fits comfortably is going to benefit you and your partner during sex in many more ways than you would think. You (and your partner) will enjoy sex more, because one that doesn’t fit right will either hug you too tightly and cause discomfort or be too loose and decrease the pleasurable sensations from having sex.

Giving Condoms A Test Drive

A great way to find out which condoms fit you well and which don’t is to purchase a variety of them and give each one a test drive. Once you have a basic idea of how they should fit, you’ll be able to decide which one fits best on you and feels better for your partner. Many stores that sell sex toys also offer several different types of “variety packs” which give you one or two of each type of condom for you to try. It may seem silly, but don’t be afraid to take notes about which ones feel better than others and which condoms your partner seems to like the best. Once you determine which one is the right one for you, it will become your “go to” condom. Keep a good supply of your favorite one available, but don’t keep them in your wallet, your jeans pockets or your car. Women should not keep condoms in their purses unless they are protected by a hard case of some kind. The friction caused by a pair of pants or a wallet can cause the wrapper to degrade, possibly making holes in the wrapper and compromising the integrity of the condom. Keeping it in your car will expose the material to extreme heat and cold, possibly causing the latex or polyurethane to degrade, thereby decreasing it’s effectiveness at preventing pregnancy and reducing the risk of transmitting STD’s. Your best bet is to keep condoms stored in a cool, dry place to keep it “fresher” longer. Always inspect the wrapper thoroughly before using it for tears or holes.

The Skinny On Female Condoms

Kaylen Jackson — Mon, 25 Oct 2010 14:00:48 +0000

Getting a guy to wear a condom isn’t always easy. Some guys don’t like the feel of condoms, or don’t want to bother buying them. He might not be concerned with safe sex, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t be concerned about safe sex either? No way! Ladies can protect themselves by using female condoms and be in control of preventing pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. But what exactly are female condoms and how do you use them? Here’s how female condoms are different from your traditional male condom and how to max out your pregnancy and STD prevention when using them.

What Are Female Condoms?

Female condoms, like their namesake, are condoms that are designed to fit inside the vagina and be used in lieu of a male condom. They consist of a silicone or plastic flexible ring at one end (this is the end designed to go first into the vagina) with a larger ring at the other end of a hollow latex or plastic “tube.” The smaller ring is folded and inserted into the vagina, where it will “pop” open and rest against the cervix, while the larger ring is made to stay outside the vagina and cover the outer opening of the vagina and labia. Some models of female condoms are larger on the outside and will cover the entire vulva including the clitoris, which provides better protection against some sexually transmitted diseases. The vaginal walls are then protected by the “tube” of latex, because the penis will only come into contact with the female condom and not the vagina at all. A man’s sperm will remain inside the female condom and after sex, the condom can be removed easily without spilling the semen.

What Are The Benefits Of Using A Female Condom?

The benefits of using a female condom are simple but powerful. Using a female condom allows a woman to be in complete control of preventing pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Instead of relying on a man to purchase a box of condoms, bring the condoms with him and put them on before sex, a woman can rely on and trust herself to make sure she is protected. In fact, a female condom can even be inserted and worn well before sex even starts, so a woman who chooses to use them can go into sex already protected, making it easier for her to say, “no glove, no love.” Female condoms also help prevent more STD’s than their male counterparts. Since the outer ring covers some or all of the vulva with the latex, it can help prevent the spread of some STD’s like genital warts, genital herpes and pubic lice or crabs.

Are There Disadvantages To Using A Female Condom?

A female condom does not feel as natural as a traditional male condom. There is much more to it and instead of fitting the vaginal wall snugly, it can get a little bunched up in there. This is because a woman’s vaginal canal is flat until something is inserted into it to expand it. Since the “tube” portion of the female condom is hollow, it too will collapse onto itself when there is nothing else in the vagina. During sex, a man’s penis will expand both the vaginal canal and the female condom, but many men and women who have used female condoms report that it still feels like the plastic or latex is bunched up in the vagina. Other disadvantages of a female condom include difficult inserting and removing them from the vagina as well as being thicker than traditional male condoms and blocking more of the pleasurable sensations of friction during sex.

How To Make A Female Condom More Effective

While there is no way to make a female condom more effective at preventing the spread of sexually transmitted diseases, however, by adding spermicide to the inside of a female condom, you can make it more effective at preventing pregnancy. A lot of women who are sensitive to spermicides enjoy using them with female condoms, because the spermicide goes inside the “tube” and never comes into contact with the vagina. Simply squirt a half dollar sized amount of spermicide into the female condom, as close to the smallest ring (the one that will go inside your vagina) as possible. You can do this before inserting the condom inside your vagina, or after. Just remember to also use a good water based lube and plenty of it when using a female condom, whether you use spermicide or not. Lube can help reduce the amount of friction created by the condom and make it feel more like natural sex.

Q&A: The Best Condoms of 2010

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 20 Sep 2010 14:00:27 +0000

Condom shopping isn’t exactly easy. With literally hundreds of different styles, sizes and materials available, it can be really hard, so to speak, to find the right one for you and your partner. While we have our personal favorites, we went to the pros at Condom Depot for the answer to this question. So here are the world’s best condoms for 2010!

Question: What are the best condoms and the best flavors?

–YouTube Viewer

The Truth About Flavored Condoms

Flavored condoms, such as strawberry, mint or chocolate, are made to both taste and smell good. However, anyone who has ever used flavored condoms for oral sex will notice that these condoms taste a little bit like flavored plastic – because they are! Flavored condoms aren’t ever going to taste so great that you will want to eat them up, but they do make giving a blowjob a little nicer. Perhaps the best part about using a flavored condom is that they smell absolutely divine! If you’ve never tried a flavored condom before, don’t expect great things when you put it in your mouth. You and your partner will, however, really enjoy the different scents! Buy a sampler pack of different flavors so you can find the ones you and your partner like the best.

Crown Skinless Skin Condoms

Crown Skinless Skin Condoms, manufactured in Japan, is the clear winner of Condom Depot’s 9th Annual Condom Awards. In fact, this particular condom has won first place all nine years in a row! This condom is favored by the adult film industry and is tinted a slight pink that makes it look like you have nothing on. The best part? They’re so thin, you don’t even feel like you have anything on! This condom clocks in at a mere 0.00185″ and is officially the thinnest condom available. Plus, no latex smell!

Durex Extra Sensitive Condoms

Durex Extra Sensitive Condoms have ranked second place in the Condom Depot awards, however, it actually ranked first place five years in a row in the Consumer Report. This is Durex’s thinnest condom, and is made to help both partners feel more sensations during sex than any other condom made by Durex. The official thickness of Durex Extra Sensitive Condoms are 0.019.” Even though this condom takes second place in the awards, it is actually about 10 times thicker than Crown Skinless Skin Condoms!

Beyond Seven Condoms

Made by the same company that manufactures Crown Skinless Skin Condoms, Beyond Seven Condoms rank third place in the 9th Annual Condom Awards by Condom Depot. This condom is made from a special latex material called “Sheerlon” and are made thinner and stronger than most condoms. They’re the same thickness as Durex Extra Sensitive Condoms, but they’re a tad narrower at the top to fit the penis like a glove.

LifeStyles SKYN Condoms

For those with latex allergies, it’s time to chuck your non-stretchy and irritating polyurethane condoms. LifeStyles SKYN Condoms are made from a revolutionary new material called “polyisoprene” and is thin and can stretch to accommodate different penis sizes just like latex. It is thinner than polyurethane condoms and transfers heat unlike latex. This condom has been FDA approved to help prevent pregnancy and the transmission of STD’s so if you’re allergic to latex but still want great feeling protection, try LifeStyles SKYN Condoms.

Impulse Bare Pleasure Condoms

Impulse Bare Pleasure Condoms are ribbed for her pleasure, so sex ends up feeling great for both him and her. A two time Condom Depot Annual Condom Award winner, this condom is very popular among fans of textured condoms. This condom, however, is considered “average” in size, but will stretch to accommodate a variety of penis sizes. Impulse Bare Pleasure Condoms also offer a low latex odor for people who just don’t like that “condom” smell.

These are only the top five best condoms in the world – the list goes on! Visit Condom Depot to learn more about the best condoms of 2010 as determined by the 9th Annual Condom Depot Annual Condom Awards. You’ll find many more condoms on the “best of 2010 list,” including condoms for larger sized men. Condom Depot is actually an excellent website for finding the best condoms to use, because you can search for condoms several different ways, including by condom manufacturer, style or size. Each condom on the website includes a picture of the actual condom, size specifications (including how thick it is) and actual consumer reviews for each condom.

Q&A: Condoms – Should You Flush Them?

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 04 Sep 2010 14:00:07 +0000

Disposing of a condom can be tricky. You want to be discreet about it, so putting it in the trash might make leave it visible to whoever uses the bathroom after you. Flushing it seems like a great idea, but can flushing a condom ruin the toilet or cause an overflow? Here’s why you shouldn’t flush a condom and how you can dispose of your condom properly.

Question: Can you flush condoms down the toilet???

–YouTube Viewer

Flushing Condoms Is Tempting

Of course flushing a condom down the toilet is tempting. It’s quick, easy and leaves absolutely no evidence behind! Instead of messing with a used condom after you’re done having sex, you simply slip it off, toss it in the toilet water and away it goes without a second thought. Flushing a condom down the toilet makes cleaning up after sex a breeze, right? Wrong! Flushing a condom down the toilet can cause a lot more problems than you originally bargained for.

Why You Shouldn’t Flush Condoms Down The Toilet!

Best case scenario, your condom goes down the toilet no problem and you never see it again. Of course, this doesn’t always happen. In fact, it actually rarely happens. A condom may not flush down the toilet the first time, and you may get stuck flushing over and over again only to watch the condom spin around the bowl in happy little circles. Of course, an even bigger problem is if the condom actually does go down the toilet and then comes back up…with everything else that is in the depths of the toilet. If you’re in your own house and aren’t trying to be discreet about having sex, this can be a definite inconvenience. However, if you’re trying to hide your condom and it comes bubbling up with the rest of the toilet contents, your cover is absolutely blown! And whoever you’re trying to hide your condom (and your safe sex) from is going to be even more mad that you caused the toilet to back up, on top of finding out that it was a condom that did it. Your condom may flush the first time and even the second time, but the more you flush your used condoms, the greater chance something not so great will happen afterwards. Not to mention that most condoms aren’t biodegradable and may end up choking some poor animal that thought it was lunch.

How To Properly - And Discreetly – Dispose Of A Condom

You may think that throwing condoms the trash isn’t discreet at all, but it can be if you do it right. It’s actually very simple. Wrap your condom in a wad of toilet paper or tissue and then throw it away. Usually, this looks like you’ve simply blown your nose in a wad of tissue and threw it away! Girls have been doing it for years and years with used female hygiene products such as sanitary napkins or tampons. If you really want to make sure no one will find your used condom, wedge your wad of toilet paper into the middle or bottom of the trash. Someone would really have to dig to find it and it’s extremely unlikely that whoever throws the trash out is going to want to get into that mess.

First Time Sex Tips – 3 Important Health Concerns

Jessica Perez — Sat, 19 Jun 2010 14:00:30 +0000

We women have been taught that first time sex is a painful experience. This notion of a painful first time affects us more than we know. We end up dreading the event and we feel tense during what we call a “trying ordeal.” I disagree with that.

Sex for the first time should not be thought of as painful. It should be a celebration of love and a grand entrance to the world of adulthood. For the first time ever, you are sharing your body with someone who is also into you.

It is a special experience, but you do have to know some important health issues linked with first time sex. Remember, you are going to have to take care of yourself more now that you have started to become sexually active. If it’s your first time, here are some important health tips you should know about…

Always Demand That He Use A Condom

If you are a virgin and he is not, there is a chance that he will be a bit lax when it comes to protection because he is entering “unchartered territory.” This means he knows he’s fairly “safe” with you because you never had lovers in the past.

However, you should always ask him to use a condom, even if it’s your first time. It’s not that you do not trust him to be able to pull out at the critical point, or that you don’t trust his judgment when it comes to his choices of the women he slept with. You just know that accidents could happen and safe sex is still the best practice.

Always bring a condom with you whenever you feel that your man is looking forward to sex after your date. This will eliminate his excuse of forgetting to bring one.

Rinse With Warm Water

I can tell you this - the first entry is uncomfortable, but the painful feeling will come after the first sex. However, you can feel “comfortable” before and after sex by being constantly lubricated. This can be achieved by intense foreplay before sex and rinsing with warm flowing water after sex.

Rinsing properly after your first time will also make sure your wound begins healing minutes after you had sex. And, the best part is, you can go at it again after you rinse if you continue with after play. Lubrication whether with your own fluids or with warm tap water, will increase your comfort.

Clitoral Orgasm

After the break in, you may feel sore in there, and he should know this. But what if you are still willing to go for another round? It’s not surprising that you didn’t reach climax during the first time. You were tense and you were anticipating sex to be painful. Clitoral orgasm for the second time sex is the answer to this dilemma.

Instead of deeper penetration, ask him to concentrate his caresses on the outer part of your vagina. He can use his fingers to probe deeper, but not so deep that you feel tense with discomfort. With your vagina sensitive and tingly after you’ve rinsed with warm water, you should feel the pleasure of clitoral orgasm more intensely.

Q&A: 5 Ways To Make Condoms More Sexy

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 14:00:58 +0000

While condoms are the best way to have safer sex, sometimes using a condom can seem to “kill the mood” or take away from you or your partner’s arousal. Does that mean you shouldn’t use a condom? Heck no! Here are some excellent ways to take putting on a condom and being safe from “blah” to sexy!

Question: I have a question, sometimes when I use a condom I lose my erection because I don’t get much stimulation and it’s a bit of a mood killer stopping and putting it on. Any advice?

–YouTube Viewer

Lube It Up

Putting a dab or two of lube on the inside of a condom before he puts it on can make a world of difference in how intercourse feels for him with a condom on. Better yet, get your man turned on by using lube to give him a great hand job before putting the condom on to get him revved up beyond the point of no return. Just remember to wash your hands with soap and warm water after the condom is on so you don’t accidentally get sperm or semen where you don’t want it.

Use Flavored Lubes

Condoms come in a variety of scents and flavors, which can make using a condom much more fun. Flavored condoms are absolutely essential for super safe oral sex, because giving your man a blow job with a regular condom on is just plain “yuck!” Try lots of different flavors to find the ones you and your partner like best, and don’t forget – flavored condoms also smell great too! Even if you’re not planning on oral sex, flavored condoms can still add that little extra sexy something.

Use Your Mouth

The biggest complaint about condoms is that stopping what you’re doing to put it on destroys the mood. Why not make putting on the condom a part of foreplay instead? Use your mouth to put on your partner’s condom, slowly unrolling it as your mouth moves down his penis. Use your lips instead of your teeth and before you know it, you and your partner will be having safer sex without a hitch!

Experiment With Different Condoms

In addition to the various fun flavors that condoms come in, there are also a variety of textures, thicknesses and brands for you to try too! Try ribbed or studded condoms, or ultra thin “skin like” condoms. Warming lubes are also great for her pleasure! Many online retailers that offer sex toys also offer condoms, and you can buy “sampler packs” at an incredible discount so you can try them all.

Put It On During Foreplay

Instead of waiting until you’re ready to have intercourse, try putting on a condom before foreplay. If it fits right, it’s not going to come off because the tapered base of the condom will hold it on nice and snug. By the time you get to the sex part, you might have even forgotten you have one on at all!

It’s A Safe Way To Get Some

One of the sexiest things about condoms is putting one on means you don’t have to freak out about STD’s and pregnancy36 while you’re getting some. You can relax and have fun instead!

Q&A: Can I Get STD’s If We’re Both Virgins?

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 14:00:40 +0000

If you’re a virgin having sex for the first time with another virgin, you may think you’re free and clear when it comes to STD’s. Unfortunately, being a virgin and having sex with a virgin is not a guarantee that you won’t contract an STD. Are sexually transmitted diseases transferred only through sex or can they be transferred other ways as well? How can you avoid contracting an STD?

Question: I’ve been going out with my boyfriend for 2 years now, what we usually do when it comes to sex is oral. He is my first and so am I to him. My question is if we are both “virgins” is there still a possibility either of us can get an STD or something similar?

–YouTube Viewer

STD’s And Sex

Many sexually transmitted diseases don’t require sex to be spread. HIV, AIDS and hepatitis A, B and C can all be spread through blood to blood contact as well as through contact with sexual fluids such as semen or vaginal fluids. Other less serious sexually transmitted diseases, such as crabs (pubic lice) or scabies, can be contracted from simple skin to skin contact (even a hug or handshake) although this is very, very rare. Many of these less serious STD’s are also transmitted from simple genital to genital contact, such as herpes, which doesn’t require any penetration or sexual fluid sharing at all to be contracted.

How To Make Yourself Safer

Sex is part of a healthy, happy and fulfilled lifestyle. Everyone craves sexual intimacy and contact with their partner and that’s completely natural. While the only way to be 100% sure that you won’t contract a sexually transmitted disease from your partner is to abstain from having sex with them, that is a difficult choice to make. If you want to have sex with your partner, take steps to make yourself as safe as possible before heading to the bedroom.

Get to know your partner, and know how many people they’ve slept with. Are they promiscuous, or a virgin? Is the probability that they have contracted a sexually transmitted disease fairly high or almost non-existent?
You can also request that your partner have a thorough STD test done by their doctor or local health department before having sex with them and offer to provide your test results with them as well.
Make sure that a condom is worn at all times to decrease the risk of contracting more serious STD’s such as hepatitis and HIV or AIDS. Oral sex can also spread sexually transmitted diseases, so make sure to use a dental dam for cunnilingus and a condom for fellatio.
Consider limiting the number of people you choose to have sex with, and give yourself some time to choose wisely. Choosing to have sex – even protected – with a variety of sexual partners automatically increases your chances of contracting a sexually transmitted disease

You can still enjoy sexual intimacy and closeness with your partner - even more so – if you choose to take steps to make sex safer for both you and your partner.

Q&A: How Old Do You Have To Be To Buy Condoms

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 04 Feb 2010 13:00:02 +0000

Many teens are realizing the importance of using contraception and condoms during sex – but is there an age restriction on buying condoms? How old do you have to be to buy condoms? Will stores deny you the ability to purchase a condom if you look under a certain age?

Question: How old do you have to be to buy condoms?

–YouTube Viewer

Age Restrictions On Buying Condoms

So far, there are no known age restrictions on purchasing condoms. Unlike cigarettes, lottery tickets, pornography and alcohol, condoms are not kept behind the counter or carded for during a purchase. You may not be able to go into a specialty sex store and purchase a condom, because other age restricted items are sold there as well, but there is nothing stopping you from going into your local gas station or supermarket and purchasing a Trojan or two. Both young men and young women are allowed to buy condoms without restriction.

If You Get Denied

If you happen to go to a supermarket or a gas station – as long as it’s not a store that sells other sexually age restricted items such as pornography – and are not allowed to buy a condom, chances are it has nothing to do with the establishment you’re purchasing the condoms from or a so-called legal age restriction on condom purchase. It is more likely that the cashier has a problem with a teen buying condoms, and feels that he or she should prevent you from doing so. If this happens, don’t be afraid to go to the management or find another store. There are many places that sell condoms, and you don’t have to be discriminated against just because you’re young. Young teens have sex all the time without using protection, you should be proud of yourself for making the choice to be safe!

Safer Sex

Congratulations for making the choice to be safer with your partner and protect both you and your partner from sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy. Many young people still aren’t making that choice and are having sex without protection, resulting in STD’s and unwanted pregnancies. Don’t be afraid to talk to your friends about having safer sex, or even give them a condom or two. Spread the word that safe is the way to be! Hopefully as we grow as a society, adults and parents will realize that teens are going to have sex, whether they have access to condoms and dental dams or not. Hopefully, we will make it easier for teens to have access to condoms and better sex education, instead of not talking about it and hoping it will go away. For now though, teens have to take safe sex and sex education into their own hands. Take the time to educate yourself and your partner about how to have safer sex, and how to avoid unwanted pregancies and sexually transmitted diseases. Nowadays, there are plenty of ways to prevent pregnancy and keep from spreading STD’s, even though society doesn’t talk about it. Sex can still be enjoyed without putting you or your partner at risk!

Is There A Male Contraception Pill?

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 01 Dec 2009 22:00:44 +0000

In the 1960′s, women’s reproductive health was revolutionized by the first female contraceptive pill. Lives everywhere were changed when women and men enjoyed the freedom to have sex without the consequence of procreation. Today, the birth control pill – also known simply as “the pill” – is the most widely used and popular form of birth control today, with surgical forms of birth control being in a different category. Women can take the pill without anyone knowing, leaving their reproductive health in their control.

What About Men?

Men, on the other hand, are limited in choices when it comes to their own sexual health. If they do not wish to conceive a child with a woman and want to take matters into their own hands, generally their only choice is to use a condom. Condoms are popular and effective – especially at preventing sexually transmitted diseases and infections - but can be conspicuous. Is there a male contraception pill that a man can take without his partner knowing to prevent pregnancy?

Not yet. But that doesn’t mean one isn’t in the works!

How Will A Male Contraceptive Work?

Ideally, a male form of “the pill” will work much the same way the female version does. A woman’s contraceptive sends hormones to her brain that tell her body not to release an egg every month. In a male contraceptive, a hormone would tell a man’s brain not to produce sperm. This is tricky though, because the primary hormones that would be used for this purpose produce a number of unwanted side effects, such as weight gain or loss of male characteristics. A combination of hormones, however, might just be effective at stopping the production of sperm without unwanted side effects. Other ideas for male contraception suggest two different proteins might be more effective at preventing sperm from impregnating a woman, with less side effects than a hormonal birth control. One protein would immobilize sperm, leaving them unable to move through the penis and into a woman’s body, and the other that will prevent sperm from maturing. All these potential forms of male contraception are intended to be reversible.

Will Men Use Birth Control?

Many women are left with unanswered questions when it comes to male contraception. When it becomes available, are men going to actually use birth control? Can they be relied upon to faithfully use their contraception so as to prevent pregnancy? Yes, but only with the proper education. Even though female birth control, condoms, and spermicide have been around for decades and have been proven to be extremely effective at preventing pregnancy, education about these contraceptive tools is still at an all time low. When male contraception is introduced, teens and adults alike must receive proper education on where it is available and how to use it.

No method of birth control is 100% effective, and only condoms can help prevent the spread of sexually transmitted diseases and infections. Whether you’re a guy or a gal, it’s important to take your reproductive health into your own hands. Women, birth control is available to you and can be taken in conjunction with condom use, spermicide use and even male contraception when it becomes available. Educate yourself about your options and stay safe – and smart!

Is Sex Less Safe When A Woman Is On Her Period?

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 29 Nov 2009 13:00:16 +0000

Everyone feels differently about sex on a woman’s period. Some women don’t mind it, other women won’t ever do it. The same goes for guys – some guys could care less if a woman is on her period or not, while other guys are going to steer clear during that time of the month. Besides personal preference, is there anything you should be worried about when it comes to having sex with a woman on her period? Is it less safe to have sex when a woman is on her period?

Pregnancy And Periods

Generally, women don’t get pregnant when they’re on their periods. First of all, an egg has to be dropped from a woman’s ovary for pregnancy to take place. Second, for a fertilized egg to implant itself in the uterus successfully, there must be enough uterine lining to house the fertilized egg well. A woman’s period is when she sheds this lining, making it a poor time for an egg to attach. That doesn’t mean it can’t happen though! Every woman’s body is different and she may drop an egg during her period, and she just may have enough menstrual lining to house the fertilized egg. While a woman is less likely to become pregnant while she is on her period, it is wise not to take that chance if you’re not planning on raising a baby. Using a condom, spermicide, traditional birth control or other barrier methods to prevent pregnancy at all times is probably your best bet if you aren’t looking to conceive.

Periods And STD’s

That said, there is another aspect of having sex while she’s on her period to consider. Sexually transmitted diseases and infections actually have a higher rate of transmission during a woman’s period than during other times of the month. Is the rate that much higher? Probably not. But it’s still something to consider. HIV and AIDS of course, do have a higher rate of transmission during a woman’s period due to direct blood to semen and semen to blood contact. Other sexually transmitted dieseases and infections can be passed from a woman to a man during her period more easily than if she is not on her period, because the organisms that cause STD’s tend to love a warm, moist environment and can multiply faster during that time of the month.

Being Safe

With all things considered, if you don’t want to conceive a child or transmit or contract an STD, it’s important to take steps to keep yourself safe at all times, no matter what time of the day, month or year it is. Simply having sex with your partner while she’s on her period isn’t going to prevent pregnancy alone, and avoiding sex with a woman on her period isn’t going to eliminate your risks of contracting an STD. Learn how to be safe, and learn how to make smart sexual decisions that will keep you and your partner happy and healthy – and kid-free if you want it that way.

Don’t know how to buy a condom, or which condoms are the best to use? Check out our Condoms 101 video mini-series. Everything you need to know about buying a condom, how to put a condom on and wearing a condom during sex!

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What Is YOUR Plan B? The Truth About Emergency Contraception

Kaylen Jackson — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 15:00:25 +0000

Contraception talks are often limited to women who don’t use it, encouraging them to explore different forms of contraception such as birth control pills and condoms. What if you’re one of the women who do already use contraception? Most forms of contraceptions are between 85% and 99% effective - in fact, no form of contraceptive is 100% effective. So what is YOUR Plan B if you happen to be in that lucky 15%?

What Is Emergency Contraception?

Emergency contraception, also known as the “morning after pill” is just that – it’s contraception that is used in the event of an emergency. If you miss a few birth control pills, the condom breaks, or your diaphragm spills as you’re taking it out. Emergency contraception isn’t regular birth control, meaning you can’t have sex without protection every time and simply use emergency contraception afterwards to prevent pregnancy. It also won’t protect you against sexually transmitted diseases or infections. But it can help when something goes wrong with your normal contraception methods.

What Is Plan B?

Plan B is the brand name of emergency contraception that is available at your local pharmacy or Planned Parenthood location. You don’t need a prescription for Plan B, but insurance won’t help pay for it either. It works – about 7 out of 8 women that would have become pregnant if they didn’t use Plan B didn’t. Plan B is most effective 72 hours after having unprotected sex or a contraceptive failure, and the longer you wait, the less effective it will be. You certainly don’t have to wait 72 hours either – take it as soon as you can after the event in question to maximize your chances of not becoming pregnant.

How Does Plan B Work?

Plan B works the same as birth control does – in fact, the chemicals are very nearly the same in the two medications, with the exception that Plan B has much stronger doses. Both Plan B and birth control work to stop the release of an egg from the ovary, as well as making the lining of your uterus inhabitable for a fertilized egg should one try to implant itself. Plan B is not an abortion – it won’t work if you’re already pregnant. It simply prevents pregnancy from happening in the first place.

Here are some things you should know about Plan B:

When you take Plan B after a contraception failure or unprotected sex, you are preventing pregnancy from that particular occurance. There is no long term pregnancy prevention with Plan B.
There are risks associated with Plan B, such as blood clots and stroke, which is higher if you smoke. These risks are similar to those with birth control. Ask your pharmacist or Planned Parenthood representative about these risks.
There are few side effects with Plan B, but it is not side effect free. You can experience changes in your menstrual cycle, nausea or dizziness. Ask your pharmacist if you have any questions about side effects with Plan B.

It’s Better To Be Prepared

Birth control doesn’t work all the time. Even the best birth control methods still have a very small window in which you can get pregnant. If you don’t want to have a baby, you should have a backup plan. You can get Plan B before your contraceptive even fails, so you’ll be ready if something happens. Shouldn’t you have a Plan B?

Update: Representatives from Plan B have contacted us with new information about their product. It is no longer called Plan B, but Plan B One Step. Those 17 and older are able to get Plan B One Step without a prescription, but those 17 and under must have a prescription for emergency contraception. Visit www.PlanBOneStep.com for more information.

What Are Crabs And How Do You Get Them? Dangerous Sex Toys?

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 03 Oct 2009 14:00:41 +0000

You’ve probably heard of the term “crabs” before, and we don’t mean the kind you get at the local seafood joint. Crabs are a curable, although annoying, sexually transmitted disease that you can get a number of ways – including non-sexual ways, such as sharing underwear with someone if it hasn’t been washed in hot water first.

Virgin girl gets crabs – did she get them from her sister’s vibrator or from somewhere else? What exactly are crabs, how do you get them and what can you do to get rid of them?

What Are Crabs?

Crabs are lice – like head lice, only much smaller, that live in the pubic area. Crabs are tiny and hard to spot, and lay eggs on the hair shaft or follicle like head lice do. Crabs are generally spread through sexual contact, although this doesn’t have to include penetration. Any sexual contact, including vaginal sex, anal sex, or any type of pubic area to pubic area contact. People with crabs (also known as pubic lice) don’t always look like they have pubic lice, and it can be hard to spot. If you have multiple sex partners, make sure you check yourself regularly.

Symptoms of crabs include white dots – which are the crabs’ eggs – in your pubic hair (easier to see if your pubic hair is dark) and can often be spotted easily with a magnifying glass. Intense itching is one of the most common symptoms, even before you begin to see eggs. If you suspect that you might have pubic lice, see your doctor. Your doctor can prescribe a simple shampoo that will remove the crabs as well as their eggs.

Avoiding Crabs

There are some ways you can avoid getting crabs, although, if you have multiple sex partners, it can be difficult to spot right away and you might come into contact with them. You can also get crabs from wearing unwashed underwear of someone who has crabs, or sharing sex toys with someone who has crabs. To avoid exposing yourself to crabs, avoid sharing sex toys with anyone, and always wash your sex toys after use (even if you’re the only one who uses them. You might not get crabs from yourself, but it’s just better hygiene and will avoid spreading unwanted bacteria). You can use a special sex toy cleaner, or simple soap and hot water.

Getting Educated

While crabs are an unwanted sexually transmitted disease, they’re curable and certainly not one of the worse. Many other infections and sexually transmitted diseases can be spread by sharing sex toys or having multiple sex partners. Many of these infections can be treated, but some can’t. It’s important to educate yourself about sexually transmitted diseases and infections and learn how they’re transmitted, what the symptoms are and how you can protect yourself. Using condoms greatly reduces your risk of contracting a number of STD’s and infections. You’re worth the time it takes to explore different resources and take charge of your sexual health. Being smart, safe and informed can save you a lot of time, money, heartache and health problems later.

Show Some Love To Trojan Man!

Christ Pro Erotic — Tue, 25 Aug 2009 02:15:13 +0000

Next time you watch television take a close look at a Viagra (or Cialas) commercials. Notice the people they are trying to reach? Mid-aged, married (assuming), wanting to get frisky like when they were young, and looking for anything to give them a boost in the bedroom. Now watch the condom commercials. They are mostly seen on the CW, MTV, or FUSE where you expect such pushing against moral values to be placed in their commercial block. Conservative religious groups see such aims as an invitation to sexual debauchery.

So what gives? Do drugs like Viagra tend to get a pat on the back by religious groups solely because they cater to the very thing they are trying to preserve: marriage? Or are condoms seen as the device to send our young person straight to sexual hell for even thinking about being sexually active with another person(s)? The idea of hating one product but not the other may not just do harm to the typical groups you are focusing on but to greater extent cause harm in the most unlikely areas of society.

Condoms Vs. Viagra

An article from Inter Press Services focused on the way condoms and Viagra are viewed by the public. It seems among conservative religious groups and others condoms are viewed as detrimental to society while Viagra is seen in a much favorable light. According to the article Michael Tan, a reproductive health activist and chair of the University of the Philippines anthropology department, says both Viagra and condoms are polar opposites. A condom is a part of the World Health Organizations (WHO) list of “essentials” when tackling HIV/AIDS, other sexually transmitted diseases (STDs), and the prevention of pregnancy. This is a no-no to many conservative groups which focuses on the need to keep young people from using condoms for fear of early entry into sexual activity. Viagra, on the other hand, works because it promotes a more active sex life and is packaged towards married couples looking for a little zest in their relationship. If it keeps the myth of monogamy and sexual purity intact then Viagra is your drug.

As much as these conservative groups (and countries supporting their viewpoint) want to keep up the pressure to put condoms out they fail to see the bigger picture of the usage among teens and adults. Condoms are used by people of all ages—straight, gay, married or single, newly sexually active or licenses pro, monogamous or non-monogamous—as is Viagra and other sexual enhancement drugs. Male swingers use Viagra for hopes of an evening of never ending sexual encounters…with condoms in tow; young men using Viagra hope to achieve “Casanova” status amongst their nubile counterparts.

Condoms For Everyone?

Condom usage is not just a young man’s game; for our seniors it is a matter of life and death. Many sexually active senior citizens (please, get over the image of your grandmother/father getting it on because they do) are seeing a rise in STDs in their community.

Recent guidelines in Extended Care facilities must allow for conjugal interactions among its residents. As long as each person has the majority of their mental capacity for consensual sexual activity.

An article in Time Magazine () highlighted the growing trend: Whatever the cause — Viagra, midlife divorce, online dating or simple ignorance — studies suggest that STDs are no longer just an affliction of the young. A study published online last week by the journal Sexually Transmitted Infections adds to that growing body of evidence. Researchers at England’s West Midlands Health Protection Agency found that in less than a decade, STD rates had more than doubled among people ages 45 and older.

The study was a small sampling to this alarming trend and it is further complicated by many seniors who don’t talk about such issues to doctors or “ignore it altogether because of the stigma placed on it.”

Money Talks

So much for giving condoms a bad name and making Viagra style drugs the savior of marriage, or the savior of ‘manhood’. Gathering all the information together for this article one of my sources suggested the real story is the connection of Viagra styled drugs to some cozy relations in government. Drug companies sleep in the same bed with those in Congress to get the approval needed to get these drugs out on the market. Conservative groups look at condoms as tools for immoral practices outside of marriage. In short, it’s all about the money. Both items are equal in the sense they are there to promote good sexual health, enjoyment, and pleasure. Whether young or old, these items shouldn’t be held as a litmus test for morals, but rather a type of way to benefit long sexual life and health. Conservative groups should be out giving the Trojan Man the help and support as much as couples who get their sexual boost singing “Viva Viagra.”

Sperm, Semen and Safe Sex – What You Need To Know

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 01:00:50 +0000

Sex education, unfortunately, is at a low nowadays. Although our society has evolved exponentially since sex was considered completely taboo – sex education is still primitive. Television shows, movies, music and even the Internet has taken sex to a completely new level, with songs about “booty calls” and nudity on prime time, but adults in this nation can’t bear to discuss more than the scant basics of sex with their youth. It’s about time somebody steps up and gives solid, useful information about every aspect of sex in an educational way so that our youth can make informed decisions about sex, oral sex and foreplay.

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

My girlfriend gives me blow jobs, hand jobs, etc. Every time we play, this white sticky stuff come out, and then after a few minutes cum comes out – what is all this stuff coming out of me?

–Jason, TX

Sperm, Semen and Precum

Lots of girls want to know – what’s the skinny on sperm, semen and precum? What are they?

Precum – The clear, thinnish and somewhat sticky liquid that comes out of the head of the penis in small amounts during penile stimulation before he actually ejaculates. Precum can and does contain live sperm, although in significantly smaller amounts than actual semen.

Semen – The whitish, thicker fluid that comes out of the head of the penis during ejaculation that contains millions of sperm.

Sperm – Organisms carried within semen and precum that join with a woman’s egg to conceive a child.

Which Of These Can Get A Girl Pregnant?

In short – all of them! Precum and semen both contain sperm. Having unprotected sex without a condom, even before the man ejaculates, can get a woman pregnant. It is better to treat a penis like a loaded gun. Many women believe that allowing a man to have intercourse with her without a condom is safe, as long as the guy pulls his penis out of her vagina before he ejaculates, and ejaculates away from her vagina. While this is safer than allowing your partner to actually ejaculate inside you, it is not a way to protect against pregnancy. Sperm can travel out of the penis pretty much at any time – allowing a condomless penis to get within the vicinity of your vagina puts you at a definite risk of getting pregnant.

Don’t chance it! Even allowing your partner to rub his penis on the outside of your vagina without a condom can transmit sperm from the penis to the vagina and there’s a reason that sperm are called “little swimmers.” They travel! For the safest type of sex, use a condom to prevent pregnancy. You can also discuss with your doctor other methods of birth control that can be used in conjunction with a condom for added protection, or in lieu of a condom if your with an STD free partner and in a completely faithful, monogamous relationship.

Which Of These Can Transmit A Sexually Transmitted Disease?

In short – all of them! Again, treat a condomless penis like a loaded gun, even more so if you’re unsure if your partner has a sexually transmitted disease. To clarify, unless you have a piece of paper in your hand that says your partner has tested negative for STD’s and you’re 110% positive your partner has not had any type of sexual contact with anyone else since the test was taken, you’re unsure of whether your partner has an STD. Protect yourself. Both precum and semen can carry the HIV and AIDS virus, as well as other sexually transmitted diseases. It is important to be even more vigilant if you’re concerned about STD’s, however, because you don’t just have to worry about any fluids from your partner’s penis coming into contact with your vagina, you also have to worry about these fluids possibly coming into contact with your mouth or any open sores or cuts on your body.

For example, if you knicked yourself shaving and your partner rubs his penis up your leg without a condom, you can possibly contract an STD that way. It’s rare – yes. But possible. Be safe and get STD tested, suggest that your partner get STD tested, stay in a monogamous, faithful relationship whenever possible, and use condoms during anal sex, oral sex and vaginal intercourse any time you’re unsure. Always treat your partner’s penis as though it can get you pregnant or give you an STD because in truth – it can! That doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy sex. Just be safe and smart about it!

Oral Sex and STD’s – What You Need To Know

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 20:00:03 +0000

While contracting an STD from unprotected oral sex (whether giving or receiving) is less likely than contracting an STD from unprotected intercourse, it’s still entirely possible. Chlamydia in your throat, anyone? It’s important to be as cautious and safe with oral sex as you would be with intercourse – and there’s lots of ways you can do that!

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Can you get STDs from oral sex? Is it a moot point to wear a condom for intercourse after that, if you’ve already had unprotected oral sex? What about girl on girl oral sex?

–Mike, FL

Less Likely? How Less Likely?

Sure, it’s less likely to contract or pass STD’s through oral sex, but how less likely? Do you even want to fool with “less likely?” Although the chances of getting sexually transmitted diseases from unprotected oral sex than those of having unprotected intercourse, you can still contract STD’s such as chlamydia, ghonnorhea, syphilis, herpes and even HIV and AIDS from unprotected oral sex. Don’t chance it! If you’re not in a monogomous relationship in which both partners have been thoroughly tested for STD’s, protect yourself during intercourse and oral sex. You can use dental dams, flavored condoms or even plastic wrap in a pinch! Don’t like the way it feels? Try using a little bit of lube on the inside of the condom/dental dam/plastic wrap to create a more natural feeling.

Using A Condom During Intercourse After Having Unprotected Oral Sex

Is it a moot point to use a condom during intercourse if you’ve already had unprotected oral sex? Not at all! Even if the person you were having unprotected oral sex with has an STD, it’s entirely possible that you did not contract it during oral sex. It’s possible you did, but it’s also possible you didn’t. It’s much more likely that you’ll contract the disease through unprotected intercourse, so why set yourself up? Wrap it up instead! Again, if you’re not in a monogomous relationship with a partner you know for a fact is STD free, protect yourself as much as possible. Even if you didn’t use protection during oral sex, it’s still worth it to use a condom during intercourse.

Get Some Information!

The Internet is jam-packed full of information about sexually transmitted diseases, how each one is spread and how you can give or contract them through sex and oral sex. With a simple Google search, you can find out the specifics – such as how a particular disease can be spread through a particular sex act, as well as the best way to protect yourself. Don’t believe the old wives tales – you know, the ones like you can prevent pregnancy by douching afterwards (which by the way can actually improve your chances of getting pregnant). Read the information on legitimate websites, such as WebMD or the CDC website instead of checking out websites that don’t have credible information.

It’s all about being safe, smart and well informed. While any type of sex – oral, vaginal or anal – puts you at risk for giving or contracting sexually transmitted diseases (protected or unprotected) you can significantly reduce your risk by practicing safer sex and using condoms and dental dams. Protect yourself – you’re worth it!

How To Put On A Condom

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 01:15:11 +0000

Whether it’s your first time or your three hundredth time, putting on a condom the correct way might still prove elusive to you. How do you put on a condom safely, how do you make sure the condom is still good and how do you take it off correctly to avoid spillage? Here’s answers to your questions, and more!

Dear Dan And Jennifer,

I’m a first time condom wearer – I want to be safe, but how do I put one on the right way? It seems harder than it should be! Do you have any tips?

–Terry, Washington

Checking Your Condom

First, keep your condoms in a cool, dry place. Condoms that are kept in glove compartments, wallets and back pockets can break down more easily than condoms that are kept in a drawer or another safe place. Before opening your condom, make sure the condom hasn’t passed its expiration date – yes, condoms can expire! Open your condom gently to make sure you’re tearing only the package (not the condom) and check it for consistency. Make sure if it’s a lubricated condom that the lube is still moist, and make sure your condom is still in good, working condition. If it seems like your condom might not be ready to go, throw it out and get a new one!

Putting Your Condom On

You might want to put your condom on in a lighted situation – putting on a condom in complete darkness can lead you to possibly put it on the wrong way. Grab the built in reservoir on the top and roll the condom slowly down the penis, making sure that all of the air bubbles are worked out of the condom before you start. To avoid fluid contamination, be sure that both your hands and penis are clean before putting on a condom. Be very careful that no fluid from the penis gets on the outside of the condom before you begin intercourse, as this may lead to sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy.

Removing Your Condom

When you’re ready to remove your condom, pull your penis out slowly while gripping the base of the condom to avoid spilling any seminal fluid that is inside the condom. Turn completely away from your partner before removing it, and slowly roll the condom back up the penis while making sure that the seminal fluid stays in the built in reservoir. Take your used condom, wrap it in tissue and throw it away properly – they don’t flush! Wash your hands and penis thoroughly with soap and water before touching your partner again.

Tips And Pointers

If a condom breaks, pull out immediately and remove the condom, washing thoroughly before putting on another one. Make sure your condom fits properly – if it’s not snug, or there are air bubbles or it seems too loose, your condom might be too big and you may need to choose a smaller size. It can also be dangerous if your condom is too small or too tight – if the ring around the base of the condom doesn’t go all the way to the base of your penis, the condom isn’t the right size for you. Don’t be afraid to experiment with different types of condoms until you find the right one for you!

Condoms 101: How To Buy A Condom

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 19:55:18 +0000

If you’ve made the decision to have safe sex with your partner – and good for you – it can still be intimidating to purchase a condom. There are so many options available when it comes to condoms, with different sizes, flavors and textures to suit almost anyone’s needs. So where do you start?

Dear Dan And Jennifer,

I want to have safe sex with my partner, but what kind of condom do I get? There are so many different types, how do I know which one is for me?

–Terrence, New Jersey

Fun And Flavored

If you’re looking to have great sex while still being safe at the same time, you don’t have to purchase the traditional, latex-smelling condoms. Many different condom manufacturers make flavored and colored condoms that both taste and smell good, so you can have both fun and safety. Great flavors include vanilla, chocolate and mint and some condoms are even glow in the dark if you want to bring a little something extra to the bedroom. Don’t be afraid to experiment with different colors and flavors to find the one you like best.

Different Materials

Condoms don’t come in latex only versions. There are actually quite a few people that are allergic to latex, so condom manufacturers had to create condoms that would be safe and effective without causing allergic reactions in some individuals. Polyurethane – a type of plastic – is a good option if you’re allergic to latex, with the exception that it doesn’t have as much “stretchy” give as a traditional latex condom. Lambskin condoms are also a choice for people allergic to latex, but they’re only effective at preventing pregnancy – they’re too porous to protect against sexually transmitted diseases.

What’s Your Size?

Condoms also come in a variety of sizes, and it can be difficult for a man to find out what size he needs. Many men feel they need a bigger condom than they really do, because almost 90% of the male population can wear a regular sized condom well. If you feel that a regular sized condom is too tight or too small, you can purchase larger sizes that might be more comfortable.

Texture, Texture, Texture

Many condoms are available in ribbed and studded varieties, helping to increase the friction between the man and the woman during intercourse, and can help increase pleasure for both partners.

Female Condoms

Ladies can also protect themselves with the female variety of condoms, although they’re not as effective as traditional male latex condoms. Unfortunately, although a female condom is a safer choice than nothing at all, it can feel a bit like having intercourse with a grocery bag inside of you.

Choosing condoms can be challenging, but it’s important to have fun with it and not be embarrassed about it! Try different types and varieties of condoms until you find the one that works best for you and your partner, and don’t be afraid to try new ones now and again. There are lots of places online to purchase a variety of condoms, or you can always stop by your local convenience store if you’re in a hurry. It’s always better to be safe than sorry!

Do I Really Need To Wear A Condom?

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 13:43:15 +0000

Whether you’re new to sex or not, you might wonder if you really need a condom. You’ve heard they protect you and protect your partner, but do you really need a condom when you’re having intercourse, or is it all just hype? Are the condom companies raking in millions for no reason or is wearing a condom really the smartest way to go?

Dear Dan And Jennifer,

I’ve heard a lot of people talk about condoms and some people say you don’t need them and that you can just pull out. What’s the truth – should I really wear a condom or is it all just rumor?

–Ted, California

Do I Need A Condom?

Yes! Condoms can help prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. While animal skin condoms are too porous to prevent STD’s, they’re still effective at preventing pregnancy and traditional latex and plastic condoms are even better. What if your partner is on birth control? Do you still need to wear a condom? Yes! Birth control is effective, but can be made less effective by taking it incorrectly, taking antibiotics or being ill. When coupling condoms with birth control, you are doubly protecting you and your partner against pregnancy as well as preventing the spread and contraction of sexually transmitted diseases.

But I Don’t Like The Way It Feels

Just because a condom might decrease the sensitivity experienced during intercourse a little is no reason not to protect you and your partner. You can still have a lot of fun with condoms – especially flavored ones and those with warming lubricant – and still have a satisfying sex life while staying safe. For some men, condoms are an excellent way to help prevent premature ejaculation. If you tend to “go” too quickly, wearing a condom might help you last longer and some are even available with desensitizing gel or cream that will help you to keep from ejaculating too quickly.

But I’m Embarrassed To Buy Them

Don’t be! If you’re buying condoms, it means you’re having sex. That’s a good thing, right? You can buy condoms at any drug store, supermarket or convenience store and they’re incredibly inexpensive. If you’d like more privacy while purchasing your condoms or would like a wider variety of condoms to choose from, there are many online stores that offer flavored, glow in the dark, colored and other types of condoms that you and your partner can really have a lot of fun with! If you purchase your condoms online, they’ll come to you in discreet packaging and no one will know but you! In reality though, there’s nothing wrong with purchasing condoms from your grocery store, a gas station or even online – it means that you’re being safe and you’re getting ready to have a great time.

All in all, it’s important to be safe – it’s always better being safe than sorry, right? Don’t have sex without a condom – you might be in your doctor’s office getting a positive result on an STD test or finding out that your partner is pregnant, wishing you would have simply put one on in the first place. Have fun with condoms and be safe, and don’t be afraid to experiment with condoms and make them a part of your sexual routine instead of a nuisance!

Safe Sex: Can That Clear Fluid Really Get Me Pregnant?

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 10 Jun 2008 14:29:33 +0000

If you’re in a steady, sexual relationship with your partner, you may be wondering just how risky you can be sexually without getting pregnant. You’re not alone!

Many people want to test the boundaries and do as much with each other without a condom as possible. Some people say that it feels better and others just like the physical closeness and intimacy.

One thing is for sure though, it is always better to be safe than sorry!

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

The white/clear liquid that comes from a guy as lube, does that contain sperms?

Is it enough to get a female pregnant?

-Tori, CA

There’s always a risk of pregnancy and STD’s when you have sex.

Yes, it’s true. If you’re having sex at all, be it protected or unprotected sex , you risk conceiving a child or contracting a sexually transmitted disease.

It’s pretty black and white, but there are many misconceptions when it comes to this. Even with condoms, there is still a 0.01% chance you may become pregnant when having intercourse with your partner. It’s important to look at the situation in a realistic light. The only completely safe sex is no sex at all.

What fluids actually contain sperm?

The only fluid that contains sperm is the ejaculate – theoretically. However, there may be some sperm hanging out in the urethra from an earlier ejaculation that can get passed to the vagina in the clear fluid that comes out of the penis during heightened stimulation. Therefore, to be safe you should assume that any fluid that comes out of the penis can contain sperm!

If you want to avoid getting pregnant or contracting a sexually transmitted disease, your best bet is to simply have your partner wear a condom for any sexual activity that would involve the penis getting near or in the vagina.

Be safe, not sorry.

If you’re not prepared for the consequences of having unprotected sex, such as contracting an STD or conceiving a child, it is extremely important that you practice having safer sex at all times! If you and your partner are able to get tested for sexually transmitted diseases and the tests are negative, you can switch to spermicide or hormonal birth control pills instead of condoms to allow for more intimacy and pleasure for both you and your partner.

If you are having unprotected sexual intercourse with your partner, you need to acknowledge the fact that the risk of getting pregnant or contracting a sexually transmitted disease is much higher than if you and your partner used a condom. Although you are not completely eliminating the risk of pregnancy and STD’s with a condom, you are reducing your chances significantly. It is much better to be safe than sorry!

Just remember that the decisions you make in bed can certainly affect the rest of your life and act accordingly. Countless individuals have made a split second error in judgment in the heat of the moment, only to realize that it is too late and they have an STD or a new baby to take care of. Just act responsibly!

Use protection any time you and your partner are ready to have intercourse and don’t let your partner’s penis near your vagina unless he has a condom on if you don’t want to get pregnant. Remember that any fluid that comes from the penis has the potential to carry sperm and sexually transmitted diseases.

If you and your partner stay safe, you can enjoy each other sexually while reducing your risks tremendously. You decide!

Thinking of Having a Threesome? Why Not Make It A Foursome…

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 08 Jun 2008 14:15:41 +0000

You and your partner have decided to have a threesome. You may even have someone in mind that you and your partner have both agreed on.

If you’re about to take the plunge into the world of multiple partner sex, you may have a few questions on how to do it safely.

Congratulations! Not everyone has safety on their mind before having a threesome. Here are some great ways to have safety in numbers.

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Just wanted to say I think it is great what you two do. My question is my girlfriend and I want to have a threesome with another female and we have one lined up. I know to use a condom but what about oral and other kinds of play? We don’t want to come home with some kind of STD.

Do you have any advice for protection?

- John, CA

Getting Tested

The first and foremost thing you should do if you’re planning to have a threesome is get tested for sexually transmitted diseases. All parties involved should have this done.

Your doctor can do this for you, or a local health department can. Have the clinic print something for you that shows your STD status and let all parties involved have a look. This is truly the best way to avoid contracting sexually transmitted diseases when having a threesome.

Sometimes, a threesome is not monogamous and this can substantially shake things up. If you can’t secure a regular threesome partner or if it’s not just a one time thing, you’ll want to take extra safety precautions.

Stepping Up The Safety Factor

- Use latex condoms, or condoms from another material if someone is allergic to latex. Female condoms are great too. Use condoms during sexual intercourse, anal sex and even during oral sex and hand to penis stimulation. While this may not sound enticing, make sure you have a bottle of lubricant with you. Lubricant can go a long way to making latex feel more natural and pleasurable.

- Use latex or vinyl gloves. If you’re going do be doing any play with your hands that involves touching the penis, vagina or anus, protect your hands and their genitals by using latex gloves or gloves of another material.

- Use dental dams or at the very least, plastic wrap when giving a woman oral sex. These both work well to protect the mouth from any vaginal secretions. The trick to using dental dams or plastic wrap is putting a few drops of lubricant on the underside of the plastic square (the side that faces the vagina) and leaving the side that faces the mouth clean. This will help increase the pleasure of oral sex.

These things aren’t going to keep you from contracting every sexually transmitted disease on the planet, but it will reduce your risk of exposure a great deal. Remember that pubic lice, scabies, genital herpes and genital warts can all be spread by skin to skin contact.

Even if you’re wearing a condom, if there’s a genital sore on the upper part of the genitals and this is something you come into contact with, you run the risk of contracting the STD.

Communication

It is essential that you communicate frequently with all parties that are to be involved in the threesome. Talk before the threesome, during and even after. Address what actions are acceptable and what aren’t. Stick to these guidelines during the threesome. Don’t put anyone in a position where they could possibly contract a sexually transmitted disease just for your own pleasure.

Keeping the lines of communication open can seem awkward, but it is essential for a successful threesome. If you’re smart and safe, you and your partner can have a great time with your new partner.

Sex Toys for Boys?

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 04 Apr 2008 16:11:36 +0000

When most people think about sex toys, they usually think about vibrators and other such toys – for women.

But what about the guys? Are there no sex toys for men?

Sure there are.

But aren’t sex toys just for women and gay guys?

Huh? Where have you been?

Times are changing, and women demand that their men look, smell, and dress like civilized people, not farm animals. Suddenly it’s OK for men to have and share a sensitive persona, it’s not just about the neanderthal tough guy perspective. Nothing wrong with true strength of character and solid, unflinching self confidence, but the woman in your life expects to be loved and treaded with loving care, as an object of your affection.

More men are “getting their hair done” in fine salons than ever before, and more are enjoying regular manicures and pedicures. It’s a matter of appreciating that how you look and how you smell is indeed important, and looking and smelling nice doesn’t make you “gay”.

Well, along with everything else, men can also enjoy sex toys with their partners. Yes, there ARE sex toys for straight men, not just big, arched, phallic vibrators and butt plugs.

One of the most well known and appreciated sex toys for men is the cock ring. Cock rings work by providing resistance against the man’s erection, thus partially restricting the blood flow in the penis to prolong pleasure, make his erection harder, and help to prevent premature ejaculation.

How many types of cock rings are there?

Surprisingly, cock rings come in many shapes and sizes.

Many are the simple and unyielding metallic or even plastic variety. Some are rubber and stretch a little or a lot.

And there is also more extreme, elaborate, fancy cock rings, complete with built in vibrating ability, such as the Hot G Vibe vibrating cock ring.

Since we like to think outside the box, let’s talk a little more about this last one…

Hot G Vibe – Vibrating Cock Rings

The Hot G Vibe cock ring is very unique among cock rings. In addition to being a cock ring, it’s also a vibrator.

And unlike many other cock rings, this one can be worn during actual penetration. Whether or not you’re comfortable with that, is another story.

Also a first among cock rings, the Hot G Vibe does not need to be worn at the base of the penis. It can be placed anywhere along the penis. Because of this “feature”, you can actually use multiple vibrating cock rings at one time. I can just see every guy thinking – I wonder how many I can fit on mine!

And of course to touch on the taboo topic of masturbation and self pleasuring, the Hot G Vibe cock rings can be work without a woman. Yes, it’s true… you can enjoy full vibrating action by yourself. You don’t even have to tell anyone about it, just like nobody knows how often you masturbate.

For any man who hasn’t ever ventured into male sex toys, perhaps it’s time you tried it. Who knows, you may like it.

And you can always start easy, maybe with a regular cock ring. And if you’re ready to go all out, try something more adventurous like the Hot G Vibe vibrating cock ring.

Why Condoms are the Latest Trend in Women’s Personal Care Products

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 13:18:48 +0000

Ahhhh the condom…

Mention it and you can clear a room faster than yelling “FIRE!”

So what do we all have against this poor little piece of latex?

Well, it can be an awkward addition to a passionate event… sort of the third party of a love triangle you don’t want to deal with.

But practically speaking, you should always have a condom with you.

Women should listen intently to this…

The Condom is a WOMAN’S Product

The condom is a very effective means of contraception, and helps to protect against Sexually Transmitted Diseases, including HIV. Women are at higher risk for most of these infections than men, simply because of the way we are designed. Some 300,000 American women have HIV or AIDS alone, and there is a new diagnosis about every 30 minutes. By age 50 at least 80% of women will have acquired genital HPV infection.

If the condom is there for contraception and to alleviate some of the spread of these viruses why aren’t more women carrying them?

It’s ironic that women can take birth control without much social consequence. Yet somehow if a woman carries a condom it places a stigma on her and conjures so many questions. Why does she need to carry condoms? Is she looking for sex? Is she easy? A woman’s answers to these questions are her own, and no one else’s business unless she invites someone into her business.

So while we all do our part to shift the stigma away from a woman taking care of herself, we can make carrying condoms a bit more discreet and a lot less embarrassing. There are so many products out there to alleviate this issue.

New Trends in Feminine Condom Accessories

You can carry them in a luxurious condom compact, like the one called Just In Case, that looks like a make up compact, but has a secret compartment for two condoms. You can even open the compact and use the mirror without giving away your secret stash! Check it out at www.JustInCaseInc.com.

If you want to keep condoms near your bedside, take a look at the Devine Condom Cube. A cute little leather cube with a magnetic closure that will hold your condoms with a little more design flair than the box they originally came in. Check this one out at www.RomanticGifts.com.

Hate the packaging of the condom itself? Check out ONE brand condoms; a new brand with a designer flair. At first glance you may not even know what it is with it’s new round packaging and avant-garde graphics. You can find these little gems at www.JIC2compact.com.

It’s Time to Shift the Paradigm for Women Carrying Condoms

The new reason to carry a condom is self respect. The new reaction to women carrying condoms must be positive. There is nothing sexier and more attractive than a woman who takes care of herself in every aspect of life. A woman who gives herself the gift of self-respect and self-love, will require that from her partner, and that woman’s partner will return the gift by honoring her request for protection. It’s a dance, when we’re unsure, we step on each others toes. When we know the steps, and follow the music, it can be the most beautiful time in your life. Keep it beautiful, keep yourself protected.

This article is brought to you by JustInCaseInc.com. To sponsor an article on AskDanAndJennifer.com, Click Here.

Ask Dan and Jennifer » condoms

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