The friend zone is not a place that you ever want to find yourself when you are interested in a woman. This aspect of dating can easily change you from a potential date to a person that gets the occasional hello.

Avoiding the dreaded friend zone is essential to keeping the spark alive in your budding relationships. If a lady only wants to be your acquaintance, then you need to cut her loose. However, there are ways that you can keep yourself from falling into this familiar path in the future. Here are some dating tips to help you stay out of the hated friend zone in the future.

Accept The Fact That She Is Not Interested

There are women out there that will never be interested in pursuing a relationship with you. Accept the fact that she is not interested. While this is not something that any guy wants to do, it’s a one of the best dating tips out there for finding a woman that is interested in having a relationship with you.

If you are clinging to a woman who has put you in a friend zone, you are wasting your time trying to woo her back. This is one aspect of life where being a quitter actually has its advantages. Nip it in the bud before you start begging and pleading for another chance.

Work On Yourself

Do you work out? Do you eat healthy? One of the best ways to gain confidence is to improve yourself before you try to date somebody. If you meet a lady that you like and you really want to impress her, give yourself a couple of weeks to improve various aspects of your life before you pursue her.

Two weeks can do a lot to somebody’s physique and eating healthier can give you the energy that you want throughout the day. Having more energy will show through your personality and the way that you carry yourself. Feeling good about yourself is an attractive quality for women, so act accordingly.

Meet New People

Getting stuck in a friend zone can occur when somebody knows you all too well. If you have been chummy with a lady for a long time, she might not think of you as a potential date. There is a reason that a staple of the most common dating tips is to meet new people. Meeting new people is exciting and allows you to play off of your own mystique.

Going out and meeting newer women will get you out of the friend zone and put into the hot seat of being a potential long term relationship. If you know the woman you like really well, this could also make her very jealous. While you should not do this with mal-intent, it is an effective means of getting her to think about you as a date instead of a “bud.”

Learn To Flirt

Some guys think that flirting is something that you’re born with, while others think that it can be learned through certain dating tips. The friend zone is dependent on being able to flirt. Teasing her a little bit about things that don’t matter is a great way to flirt with her.

Don’t tell her that her eyes are too far apart, but picking up on something little could get her laughing. Start small and work your way up to making more sexualized comments. Once you have achieved this properly, she should be looking at you in a whole new light. Be bold with her and you will never end up as an acquaintance again.

Slight Touches

Slight touches can be a great way to emphasize that you are not looking for a platonic relationship. Touching her arm as you laugh with her or putting your hand on the small of her back as she goes through a door are some of the best ways to show that you are sexually interested.

If she does not respond to these methods or responds negatively, back off immediately. The last thing that you want to do is make her uncomfortable. If she touches you back then you’re in the clear. Women do not touch guys that they don’t want to date.

Being in the friend zone can be one of the most frustrating aspects of dating. Getting out of it is tough and some methods work better than others. Turning yourself from a platonic relationship into a date is not always easy, but it is possible in most situations. Follow these guidelines and you should start to see a vast improvement of her perception of you.

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What Is The “Jerk Paradox?”

Have you ever known a hot girl – maybe you had a crush on her – but she was dating a guy who was a complete ass?

Maybe you felt like she’d be better off you – you would have treated her like a queen – but she stuck with the mean guy no matter what he did to her?

I think we’ve all seen this happen – a lot.

We’ve all seen a beautiful girl who is CRAZY over a man jerk who don’t pay her much attention.

Heck, I’ve even seen beautiful girls who could have their choice of great guys stick with dudes who were downright ABUSIVE! I used to say, “why isn’t that girl with a fella like me? Or ANY other man for that matter?”

It just didn’t make sense.

But then finally, I realized what was going on.

Why Mean Men Get The Girls While Nice Ones Finish Last

Have you heard the famous Chris Rock comedy bit about guys “offering d*ck”?

It’s REALLY funny. Basically what Chris points out is that every woman in the world, since she was 13 years old, has had pretty much man she’s ever met offering her sex!

He goes on to say how every time a guy talks to a girl, he is really just trying to get into her pants.

“Can I get that for ya” translates into “How ’bout some d*ck?”

“Can I help you with that?” translates into “Can I help you with some d*ck?”

Too funny! And let me tell you, this is truer than all the dating tips in the world!

Every woman you know – especially if she’s attractive – has men THROWING THEMSELVES at her 10 times a day!

So if you approach a woman in the WRONG WAY – which is any way that DOESN’T make her work for it – she automatically throws you in the same category as every other wimp she has met, and she automatically forgets about dating you.

Why Cocky Men Never Have This Problem

The thing about guys who are mean is that they NATURALLY approach, talk to, and deal with women in a way that is TOTALLY DIFFERENT than the dozens of other guys trying to get into her pants.

It’s very subtle. You actually might not even see the difference unless it was pointed out to you, but the RESULT is very different.

It’s different because it sparks a woman’s curiosity, then creates a subtle challenge that makes her feel like she has to WORK for his attention, not the other way around.

This type of challenge is very addicting to a woman. Women LOVE games and solving puzzles – it’s the reason they read all of those mystery novels – so when they meet a guy who is a challenge they just cant get enough of him.

How To Get These Same Smoking Hot Women - Without Being An Ass!

If you can make a woman feel like she has to WORK FOR IT, it gets her chasing you. She starts to see YOU as the “catch” and gets very excited about the possibility of being with you.

It’s this simple little thing that separates the guys who get the 10′s from the guys who don’t.

It NOTHING to do with being full of yourself and being mean to women. And EVERYTHING to do with being a CHALLENGE.

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Experienced guys don’t view strip clubs through the eyes of the average chump customer. They see target-rich environments filled with sexy, available women. They’re also a great place to hone your skills and become comfortable flirting with 9’s and 10’s in other settings.

Sure, the girls are looking to get your money. It’s their job. This is why you’ve got to flip the script, cause them to stop perceiving you as a customer, and make them play YOUR game instead of playing theirs.

Put the these great tactics to work, and you can build connections, collect phone numbers, and set up dates just as you would at a bar.

1. Have A Bulletproof Mindset

Know you’re way more interesting and confident than 99% of the customers who come to this place. A stripper will spend most of their shift having tedious conversations with lame, unattractive men. Once you’ve demonstrated otherwise, she’ll be pleasantly surprised to meet you.

2. Have Confidence!

When you enter the club, have confidence and walk around with your head held high, like you own the place. Never lurk or mill around as if you’re unsure of where to sit. Find a seat and settle in and relax!

3. Make Her Sit BESIDE You

When a hot stripper approaches you, don’t let her sit on your lap. Make her sit beside you. (“Whoa, easy there. Have a seat next to me until we get to know each other a little better.”)

Also, don’t agree if she immediately offers a striptease. Instead, engage her in conversation and control the flow.

4. Maintain Eye Contact

Keep your eyes off of her body and maintain eye contact. Never comment on how good she looks; if anything, call her “cute.” (“Wow. Not only are you the cutest girl here, but you can actually hold an intelligent conversation.”)

5. Break Out Of Her Routine

Dancers, like salesmen, have canned routines that they use to make customers feel comfortable and ready to spend money. When she asks you your name, or where you’re from, ignore it. Go into your OWN routine.

6. Be Respectful Of Her Profession

Never refer to it as “stripping”; the term to use for her is “dancer.” Say (or imply) that you’ve dated dancers before and demonstrate familiarity with her profession. “It’s too bad I swore off dating dancers, because I can tell you and I would get along. I get the sense there’s a lot more to you than meets the eye.”

7. Befriend The Staff

Bouncers, coat check, bus boys, DJ’s, managers, owner, etc. When you visit, staff members should know and greet you. This gives you high social value in the eyes of the dancers; you’re not a typical customer.

Befriending a male staff member is easy: say, “Dude, you’re the envy of every guy—hanging out in a club full of beautiful, half-naked women and getting paid for it. You make me want to consider a career change. By the way, my name’s ______.”

(Sometimes I’ll buy a bottle of water or a Red Bull, and bring it outside and hand it to a doorman. I’ll say, “hey man, I figured you could use a drink out here. I’m not getting good cell phone reception inside, I need to check my messages.” I’ll check my messages real quick, then introduce myself to the doorman—who is always very appreciative of the drink—and get him on my side.)

8. Don’t Forget She’s There To Make Money

Go on slow nights (i.e. a weeknight) when there aren’t a lot of customers vying for her attention. After you’ve been chatting for a little while, it’s okay to buy a dance from her—but a minute or two into the song, tell her she can sit back down, and resume the conversation. (Again, always behave like a non-customer.)

9. Use Good Conversation Lines

During the conversation, apply the same techniques you would use on women in a bar. Ask her questions that prompt her to reveal quirky things about herself. Use hypotheticals, i.e., “If you could teleport right now to anywhere in the world, where would you go?”

Here’s another good one: “Tell me something about yourself that the customers in here would never suspect.”

10. Don’t Expect To Go Home With Her Right Away

It might take a couple of visits for you to “close” the dancer you like (getting her number, or meeting her after her shift). If you’re not buying dances and she has to go, encourage her to go make money. (“I’ve got some business to go handle, and I can see there a lot of lonely guys in here who’d love to pay for your company. I need to bounce, it was awesome to meet you.”)

Make your exit and return in the near future to continue building your connection with her. If after several chat sessions she’ll still giving you the “run around” and has excuses why she can’t hang out with you outside of the club, or she won’t even give up her phone number, be a man about it. Tell her, no problem, you understand, and the next time you return to the strip club you should select another girl to mack on.

If your original target gives you dirty looks while you’re macking on her co-worker, don’t even let it faze you. She missed her chance to get on board your train and take the ride of her life.

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Deflection Tactics

First of all, keep in mind that when a stripper approaches you, she’s asking permission to enter your space. You are the boss, essentially. When she starts going into her “sales routine” to try to get you to buy a striptease, don’t do anything to empower the part of her that is trying to seduce you or sell you. In other words, don’t play along with her game. Make her play yours.

Let her speak first. Then deflect whatever she says and change the subject. Take control of the interaction.

Another “deflection” tactic: Look at her, smile, and say “I don’t want to be rude, honey, but you’ve got something on your nose (rub your nostril). She’ll instantly get self-conscious and wipe her nose.

This is effective for “disarming” her and breaking her out of her sales routine. Tell her to sit down with you, then grab a napkin and gently wipe her nose (which doesn’t actually have anything on it). Now go into leading the conversation.

What To Do When A Stripper You Like Heads Your Way

When a stripper you like approaches you, don’t let her plant herself on your lap. Make her sit beside you. If she tries to sit on your lap, say, “Whoa, I’m not that easy! Have a seat, until we get to know each other a little better.”

If she offers a lap dance right then, you never want to say “yes,” because then you’re framing yourself as a typical chump customer.

But you don’t want to say “no” either, because then she’ll feel rejected—or she’ll figure you’re a cheapskate who wants to try to hit on her without having to open your wallet.

Do NOT offer to buy her a drink at this time. (Remember, you’re going to make her feel that she earned it.) You want her to sit next to you so that you can engage her in conversation and control the flow.

Deflect, and get her to sit down next to you. I might say, “Have a seat, I’m sure your feet are killing you in those heels. The craziest thing just happened, you’ve got to hear this….”

(A good “story” to tell: say that two of the dancers just got into a catfight outside the bathroom! Screaming, hair-pulling, hissing…it was wild!)

How To Take Control Of The Conversation

Once she’s sitting next to you, you’ve got to take control of the conversation, because otherwise she’ll go into her “routine.” Strippers, like computers, operate according to a program. She basically uses this same flirting routine, or program, with every customer.

If you don’t control the conversation, she’ll start asking you the standard questions (“So how are you feeling tonight,” “What’s your name,” “Is this your first time here,” etc.), in an attempt to build a connection with you and butter you up for a dance.

NOTE: The length of time she waits before asking me for a dance is an indicator of how skilled and experienced she is at her job. Essentially, strippers are saleswomen. The product they’re selling is themselves.

The real pros won’t hit you up for a dance too soon, and they won’t directly ask you “Wanna dance?” They’re craftier about it. They’ll take some time to butter you up and flirt with you. Once she has created the sense that there is a “connection” between the two of you, that’s when the skilled stripper will close the deal and get you to buy a dance. She might say, “Do you mind if I dance for you?” or, “I love this song! Can I dance for you?”

Put it this way – when you walk onto a car lot, no good salesman is going to walk straight up to you and try to sell you an expensive vehicle. He’s going to spend some time talking to you and feeling you out. He won’t go for the “close” until he knows he’s got you very interested in a particular vehicle.

Your goal is to disrupt her from her routine before she has a chance to go into it. “Short circuit” her program, and you’ll force her to engage in a real conversation. The most effective way to do this is to start talking about a completely unrelated subject. Remember, you’re making her step into your world, instead of taking the bait and stepping into hers.

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Why Confidence Is So Important

Confidence is one of the most important aspects of dating. Building confidence is not difficult when you know how to use your best assets. Having self-assurance can easily boost your perception in the eyes of others and can have an impact on your work life as well as your dating life.

Creating a persona of poise can turn nerve-racking first dates and approaches into attainable scenarios by giving you the tools needed to be sure that positive outcomes are possible. Here are a few easy techniques for building your confidence.

Change Up Your Wardrobe

When you look good you feel good. Changing your wardrobe is one of the best ways to boost your self-confidence. When you change your wardrobe people will take notice. Your clothes are one of the first things that people notice about you. If you are going on a date in ratty jeans and a shirt that was too tight in the 8th grade, it’s time for an update.

A suggestion that a lot of guys do not take seriously is the consultation of a stylist. Stylists know what women like and they know the trends of the fashion industry. They will also be able to tell you where to shop without breaking the bank.

Let Go Of Past Relationships

Being hurt or humiliated by an ex-girlfriend can shatter any man’s self-image. Let go of past relationships. It doesn’t matter if an ex cheated on you or said hurtful things, you have qualities that a great girl is going to admire. Let go of the past and look forward to the future.

It’s only natural to feel like you’re never going to meet another girl or that you might be alone for the rest of your life. This unreasonable hopelessness is known as “catastrophic thinking” and can render you with the inability to approach women. Let go of your past relationships and think of them as a learning experience. It’s time to move on. Thinking about the future can give you a fresh perspective on your love life.

Get Healthy & In Shape To Feel GOOD About Yourself!

If you already work out then you’re a step ahead of the rest. However, if you are not working out you need to start now. Working out is a great stress reliever and can build your confidence immeasurably. Join a gym or just start running in the afternoons.

When you start to feel like you’re never going to meet anybody or that you’re not good enough for women, working out can make these thoughts fly out of your head instantaneously. Joining a gym is also one of the best ways to start meeting a new clientele of women.

Create A List Of Qualities You Want In A Woman

Creating a list of qualities that you want in a woman will help you weed out bad dates. Just taking any old date is not recommended. Knowing that you have no interest in a girl and that you’re just taking her out to try to make yourself feel better is selfish. When you are picky about whom you go out with you will feel a lot better about yourself.

Desperation is something that a lot of guys feel after recent break ups or being alone for a long time. Clinging to a girl that you know you have no future with is a recipe for disaster. Make a list of all the qualities you want in a woman and then stick to that list. When you find a girl that has most or all of the qualities, you will feel a lot better about your choice.

Laugh!!

Laugh about past missteps with former girlfriends or dates. Laughing can easily lighten the situation and take all of the darkness out of your thinking. Don’t take your dating too seriously. If a girl turns you down, laugh about it. Any girl that turns you down just isn’t right for you. Don’t fall into the cliché of saying “her loss.”

While you might say this to build your confidence, it almost always comes back to haunt your mind. You will start thinking, “Is it really her loss? Or is it mine?” Just laugh the situation off and move on. There are a lot of women out there that you can make happy. Every misstep is a step closer to finding somebody that you can connect with on a deeper level.

Confidence is a vital part of dating. When you do not feel comfortable enough with yourself it will show through your mannerisms. Stick to these suggestions and you will start seeing results in as little as a couple of days.

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Leave Roses And A Note In Her Car

Grab a bouquet of roses and write a simple note with your phone number on it. Plainly state, “I would love to take you out for Valentine’s Day. Give me a call!” Don’t be too lovey dovey or pushy in your note, because the flowers add enough intensity to this scenario – too much and you’ll scare her off.

Also, meeting her at her car, say when she gets off work, with flowers and asking her out in person is also very sweet and acceptable. If you don’t want to get rejected in person and you think there’s a possibility of that, the note works well for that.

Send Flowers To Her Work

Flowers are an excellent way to get a lady to warm up to you, as long as they’re not too extravagant and obviously expensive. Bigger is not better here – however, taking note of her personal style and taste and selecting flowers that you genuinely believe she’ll like is. Take some time to select a nice bouquet with her favorite flowers and colors and have it delivered to her workplace.

You can put “from your secret admirer” if you like (this is almost always exciting for a woman, because in all honesty, it rarely ever happens for real) but make sure to include your phone number so she can get back to you. The great thing about sending it to work is that you’ll be making certain that all her work friends (and frienemies) see it. This will make her feel intensely special, and they’ll also put some good natured pressure on her to accept your offer.

Text Her To Meet You Somewhere Romantic

If you already have her phone number, this is an excellent way to meet her to ask her out in person. Send her a text asking her to meet you somewhere romantic – but not too romantic if you think it might scare her off. Meet at the park under your favorite tree, by a lake or river, or anywhere else nature can help you out a little.

If your local grocery store has a large Valentine’s Day section – may of them inflate balloons and let them float up to the ceiling, creating an entire section of surreal pink and red floating ribbon – you can meet there (this really only works if the atmosphere is super appealing).

In A Scavenger Hunt

Send your potential date on a scavenger hunt, with lots of little notes that lead either to another note with a big reveal or you, holding flowers. Make sure the “gold at the end of the rainbow” is fun and exciting enough to have made it worth the hunt. Just use your creativity for this one!

Use the notes to write fun clues as to where to find the next clues. With each note, include something small, like a rose petal (to indicate that the big reveal might include roses) or candy. When she reaches the reveal, either use a note to ask her out for Valentine’s Day, or do it in person. Again, don’t put too much pressure on her to respond. Have a card in your pocket with your phone number on it that you can pull out and say, “Think about it and call me if you’re interested” if she chokes.

Remember, if she seems uncomfortable or reluctant at all, you want to use the card. You may still get turned down, but there’s a good chance she was just nervous or didn’t know what to say or do when put on the spot like that. If you slip her your number and allow her some time to calm down and think about what happened, you give her a reprieve.

If you don’t, she is much more likely to turn you down because she felt uncomfortable. If you do, you’ll increase your chances of her calling you and letting you know that she really loved what you did, but was really nervous and shy while it was happening.

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Taking different aspects into account can easily garner you a great date with minimal effort. Here are a few tips to help you through the digital age of women’s liberation.

1. Use Facebook

Facebook is the standard for proving that you’re a great guy. One of the best dating tips out there is to get your Facebook account updated right now. Facebook is going to be a way for you to show off pictures of your family and friends so the girl knows that you’re not a creep. When you meet a girl and get her phone number, she will probably ask for your last name. This is so she can look up your profile and make sure that you’re not a hermit. There are even specific dating methods that focus on Facebook for picking up girls.

The Facebook Method talks about setting up your profile like a dating profile so if you meet a girl she will see your best attributes when she’s checking up on you. Update your Facebook account with recent pictures and remove any pictures of your ex-girlfriends. If you have pictures of yourself with other girls, make sure that you put a caption showing that she’s a friend.

2. Pay The Small Bill

Let’s say that you meet a girl and ask her out for a drink. While dating tips of the past tell guys that they should pay the entire bill, this is not recommended. Pay for a small bill and let her pay for herself if you are getting dinner. If you are meeting a girl for a drink, pay for the drink. A drink will cost you anywhere from $4-$9 dollars. Having a $12 tab collectively is not going to leave you penniless.

If you are meeting her for dinner and she insists on paying for herself, let her. As cold as it may seem, she might not want a second date, so there is not reason that you should be shelling out when she is insisting on paying for herself anyways. Women have good jobs, most of which are going to be better than your own, so let her pay. Some men think this is a power play when in reality she just wants to pull her own weight.

3. Be Chivalrous In Other Ways

Traditional dating tips focus on chivalry as a staple of all dating. Even though we live in an age of women’s liberation, they still want to feel like a lady when you take them out. Holding doors, dressing appropriately and pulling her chair out for her are seen as chivalrous acts. Make sure that you are being chivalrous with all dates. Even if you’re not interested in going on a second date, she might have some single friends. In a lot of ways, dating can be comparable to business.

Never burn a bridge just because you don’t see a future with her. Keep in touch and she might tell her friends that you’re a great guy, but there just wasn’t any chemistry. You never know. She might try to set you up based on how well you treat her throughout the date.

4. Be Actionable

Letting a girl down easy by telling her you’re going to call might seem like one the best dating tips, but it’s not recommended. If you tell a girl that you’re going to call her again, call her again. Even if you aren’t sure if there’s chemistry, call her anyway. More than likely, she will pick up on whether or not you’re interested. You don’t want to miss out on a potential relationship just because you never called her back. Dates don’t always go the way that we want.

Having a bad day can easily reflect in a first or second date. Being on the fence isn’t an excuse. Play it out until you are sure that you don’t want to be with her. Telling a girl that you’re going to call when you know that you won’t is not fair to either of you. If you really don’t have any interest in seeing her again, say something like “It was nice meeting you.” This is much easier better than “I’ll call you this week” or “See you never.

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What About The Server?

If the waitress likes you, she’ll talk you up to her stripper friends. They, in turn, will start paying more attention to YOU. This increases your chances of getting to go home with a stripper, or at the very least, you increase your chances of getting to go home with the waitress (who is probably just as hot, but not naked!)

Soon after you sit down, your cocktail server is going to come over to take your drink order. (Remember, the overpriced beverages is how these clubs make money, and you are expected to make a purchase.)

Even if you don’t want anything to drink right now, the correct move is to order something in order to establish rapport (and a little flirting!) with your cocktail waitress. It’s also important for you to order this first drink BEFORE you have a dancer come sit with you.

Yes, You Want A Drink FIRST

Otherwise, the moment a dancer sits with you, the waitress might come over and you’ll feel pressured to buy the dancer a drink as well, before it is appropriate to offer her one.

You’ll want some time to get to know the dancer of your choice before you offer her a drink. It’s the same way a suave guy plays it in a regular bar; you never offer a girl a drink immediately. You wait until you’ve been chatting with her for awhile and can spin it into an “I.O.U.”

The basic idea is that buying a girl a drink should feel like a reward you are giving her, because you’ve been enjoying her company. Never buy her a drink right off the bat because you feel obligated to do so. Don’t feel like you’re supposed to buy her a drink just because she’s sitting next to you and trying to hang out.

You’re going to make her EARN that drink – that is, if you choose to buy it and grant her more of your time. This is the correct mindset.

Ok, More About The Waitress

In a strip club, the way you interact with your cocktail waitress is important on several levels. In most clubs, you’ll have one waitress attending to you for the duration of your visit, and she’ll be stopping by periodically to check whether you need another drink.

Always make this waitress your ally. Give her a friendly smile and introduce yourself by name. Make sure you get her name, and remember it. Then pay her a quick compliment on some aspect of her appearance, something original that she’s not hearing from the other guys. Notice her smile, her hairstyle, or a piece of jewelry she’s wearing.

Chances are this type of compliment will catch her off-guard and bring a smile to her face. If your waitress isn’t attractive, this compliment can really go a long way towards making her your ally, because she rarely gets this type of flattery.

Remember, you want the server as your ally!

Just think about it. The server is working in an environment where she’s surrounded by naked women. When’s the last time a nice guy stopped to take notice of her appearance, and singled out her for praise instead of a stripper? Yeah. There you go.

While you want to know how to keep your spending to a minimum in strip clubs if you frequent them looking to hook up with a stripper, you can’t be cheap with your server. Period.

It isn’t about the size of the tip so much as it’s about the way you present it to her. You can tip just a few dollars and turn it into a special, generous gesture that she is bound to appreciate.

How EXACTLY To Get In Good With The Server

When she brings you your first drink and hands you the change, rifle through the singles, count out four or five dollars, and say “here, keep this Jackie, I’m glad you’re taking care of my service tonight.” A small gesture like this can go a long way.

Later on, when you’re sitting and chatting with the stripper you select, give your waitress another tip in the same fashion: rifle through your cash, give her a few dollars, and tell her “here, this if for you Jackie.” (Always use her name!) Your server will smile and thank you, which will make you look like way more appealing to the stripper you’re sitting with.

It’s not about the size of the tip. It’s all in how you present it. Any jerk can throw a $20 bill on her tray and dismiss her. You, on the other hand, can tip her $3 or $4 and make it feel to her like a friendly, generous gesture because you appreciate the good service.

Remember, if you’re in good with the server, you’re in good with the club and as a result, in good with whichever stripper you want to put your attention on for the evening. It’s win-win all around!

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Getting In The Door

The first person you’re going to encounter at the club is the doorman. This guy has a lot of juice and is someone you should always make an effort to be cool with. Give him a friendly greeting, look him in the eye, and shake his hand and tell him your name.

This shows respect, which goes a long way in this testosterone filled environment. The doorman sees at least a hundred faces a night, and many of them are creepy weirdos, arrogant big shots, or rude punks he’d rather forget. A cool, courteous guest is always appreciated.

Always be prepared for when you approach the front door. Make sure you and your friends have your ID’s ready and enough cash to pay the cover charge, if there is one. Your entrance should set the tone for this mission: smooth, flawless and always making a positive impression. Juggling for ID’s, or having to scrounge together cash to pay the cover, makes you look like an amateur.

Know Where To Go

Once you’re inside the club, be decisive and take action. Scope the room quickly and find the location where you want to establish your “home base.” Remember that at this moment, the dancers that aren’t with customers are checking you out and watching how you handle yourself. They’ve always got their eyes peeled for potential customers coming in the front door.

Wandering around like a lost puppy, or lurking by the entrance, says “I don’t belong here!”

The “suave” guy never looks unsure of his next move. He examines the possibilities and takes action. If you’ve got a choice between sitting at the bar or sitting at a table, always take the table: it projects the attitude that you came to have a good time and are ready to chill with some female company. You also want to have an empty seat beside you for the dancer you select to sit in.

Maintain the attitude that you’re way more interesting and appealing than 99% of the customers who come to this place. Strippers spend most of their time at work having tedious conversations with boring chumps.

Don’t Throw Money At The Dancers

Another category of men who frequent strip clubs are high rollers – the ones who throw around money to compensate for having no game. Dancers are typically turned off by high rollers. Sure, they’ll pretend to adore them and accept their generous tips, but they’re not attracted to them.

Deep down, the dancers who have brains and a good attitude—the one you’ll want to mack on—are disgusted by the way high rollers lord over the club and treat the women as disposable sex objects.

In a nutshell, you need to take the attitude that you’re surrounded by beautiful women and a bunch of various losers, loners, and guys who have money to spend but have zero skills with women.

Have Confidence And Good Body Language

When you enter the strip club, walk around with your head held high and standing tall. Imagine that you’re only there because your buddy is the owner, and he invited you to come by. Your vibe, your body language, and your behavior should never suggest that you’re just a “regular customer.”

Remember, body language and confidence is key. Act totally familiar and comfortable with the environment, and the girls will assume you must be somebody. This is one way to immediately set yourself apart from the average customer.

Don’t sit on “pervert row” (the seats in front of the stage); establish your base of operations on the perimeter of the room.

It’s alright to arrive with friends and have a drink together while you scout the talent, but you don’t want to be sitting with them when the game begins. The stripper isn’t going to feel comfortable trying to have a one-on-one interaction with you, while your buddies check her out and listen in on your conversation. When it’s time to get down to business and start talking with these women, you should split up from your friends and sit alone.

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If you have recently become a young professional male, you probably need some dating tips to help you transition from college dating. College dating is all about doing things on the cheap. When you’re a young professional male dating is no longer a couple of MGD’s in a field.

You are expected to class things up a little bit. Getting a crash course in dating tips for a young professional male will keep you from looking ridiculous when you ask out a girl that has a decent job. This can also help you look professional when out and about. Here are some dating tips for young professional males.

1. Pay Attention To Your Wardrobe

One of the best dating tips you can get is to make an immediate change to your wardrobe. Your wardrobe is going to be a dead giveaway of either having a good job or being a bum. You don’t have to put on your Sunday’s best when you’re doing yard work, but having nicer clothing will separate you from the rest of the guys vying for her attention. Don’t think that you have to wear Brooks Brothers to look good. Shopping at a retail outlet can easily save you some money on your wardrobe. The hierarchy should be nice shirts, decent pants and really nice shoes.

2. Keep In Mind Your Profession Doesn’t Define You

Congratulations! You made it through college and now you have a job. Yes, your job is important to you, but that doesn’t mean that you have to talk about it all the time. A job is something that can say a lot about you, but it doesn’t define you. When you are first starting out in the job market you probably will not be a VP of marketing.

If you do get an amazing job right out of college then you’re above the rest. But just because you have a good job doesn’t mean that the girl is going to be impressed. Successful guys approach beautiful women all the time. You need to separate yourself from the self-involved guys that always approach women by appealing to them on a real level. Don’t make your job the topic of every conversation.

3. Be Current

As a young professional male, one of the best dating tips to consider is brushing up on your current events. Current events are one of the best ways to easily have conversations with women. When you are in the know about current events, TV shows, movies and other aspects of popular culture and news you show that you’re interested in the world. Women don’t want a guy that is living in his own world. Make it a point to stay current with the various aspects of the news to alleviate any awkward silences during a date.

4. Leave The Frat House Behind

As mentioned before, you’re not in college anymore. You’re a young professional male and it’s time that you act like one. As far as dating tips go, being what you are instead of playing the part is one of the best tips to give. No more blackout drinking, staying out until all hours of the night or living in a pig pen. Ditch all of your old habits and start being a young professional man. This means going to bed at a reasonable hour, abstaining from alcohol regularly and keeping a professional attitude in all aspects of your life.

5. Be Active

It’s all too easy to work a 40-hour week and then just come home to lie around on the couch. Women don’t want a guy that doesn’t have hobbies. Find a couple of activities that you like doing and keep up with them.

Get into a routine of daily trips to the gym or weekly movies with your friends. When you have a hobby it’s much easier to get a potential date involved. This is one of the best dating tips for young guys because it leads to common interests and teaching the girl a new skill. This will also keep you from being clingy and needy.

6. Don’t Be The Bank

You have a great job, but that doesn’t mean that you’re her personal ATM. Paying on the first date is pretty customary. If she insists on paying for herself then let her, but if she lets you pay for her then go ahead and pay for the meal. You’ve got a new job and it’s probably the first time in your life that you have disposable income. Treat her to dinner or drinks and don’t make a big deal out of it. However, the last thing that you want to do is be her bank.

This is one of the many dating tips that are universal to all aspects of the dating world, but especially true for young professionals. Your money is your money. How you choose to spend it is your choice. If you want to make a good impression buy her dinner, but don’t make it an expectation on her part.

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Dream girl. Those are the words on every guys lips (or other parts). There are as many different definitions of what a dream girl is as there are stars in the sky. We all want one, even though we all define it differently. You’ll need a few dating tips to make the search easier, more fun and more importantly to prevent burnout and frustration.

Becoming A Guy Who Gets The Girl

What’s the ultimate dating tip weapon for guys out there? It’s simple, not easy. If you want to get the dream girl, you have to become a dream guy. You need to be the guy girls want to be with. Think about it. If you want a girl who is a “ten” that’s fine. But why should she choose you? She can have anyone or anything she wants. Men and women are literally throwing themselves at this woman on a daily basis (sometimes more than once a day). If you want a woman who can stop traffic with her looks, you’d better be the guy who can stop traffic.

Be confident and funny. You may have heard this before, but we will say it again: life is short (if you do it right), so have fun. Enjoy your own life or she won’t. Yes, it’s true: sports cars don’t hurt, but you don’t need them. A girl who’s with you because of your money or car is someone you don’t want. That means you want a girl who will love you for you, because if a golddigger finds someone with more money or a better car, she’ll be off like a prom dress. So make your dream girl an offer she can’t refuse. Make your world amazing and fun and exciting. She won’t want to be with anyone else, even if they do have more money or a better car.

Have A Fun, Radiant Personality

How do you create that? Well, it’s funny you should ask. You should have a have radiant personality. So many get caught up or hung up on what to say or do. They can’t think of anything so they freeze or miss opportunities. Here’s the thing: it doesn’t matter. Nobody cares what you say or do. People remember how you make them feel. It may be hard to believe, but it’s really true. It doesn’t matter what you say or do.

Make sure to have fun. Everywhere. Women are different creatures than men. Girls are addicted to guys who make them feel good. So above all, make sure to have fun at all times, whenever possible. Because when you do, you’ll find yourself meeting women everywhere, and it will be effortless. Why? Because beautiful women are everywhere and all the world is your oyster. You don’t have to go to bars or any other specific place to meet women, though we’re not saying you can’t go there. When you’re having fun everywhere, you’ll be attracting women anywhere.

Have A Sense Of Humor

Don’t take anything too seriously. You know what? Meeting your dream girl isn’t driving the space shuttle. And if you are piloting the shuttle? That’s odd. Shouldn’t you be paying attention to what you’re doing? How are you accessing the internet in the space shuttle? Those computers are like thirty years old! Why are you even piloting it? It’s been decommissioned!

Anyway, the point is this isn’t that dating is big a deal. Yes, dating tips are important to finding and keeping your dream girl, but lighten up. It’s not that serious. Make a game of it or if you don’t it’s going to feel like work. Then you’ll be forcing it and it will get even worse. Get rid of anyone or anything that doesn’t serve you. Take the pressure off yourself. Eliminate excuses and take action.

That alone will set you apart. Think about it. How many people who are overweight and say they’re going to lose weight actually do it? There you go. IF you can lose the weight metaphorically speaking, you will set yourself apart. Just do something. Get in the game grasshopper!

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1. Dressing Like A Chump

When it comes to budgeting money on the stuff that entertains them, most guys have their priorities all backwards. Nothing on earth is more entertaining than having sex with beautiful women (in my opinion, at least) and yet they aren’t willing to invest money in themselves in order to achieve this goal.

I know guys who haven’t changed their style since high school or college. They’re wearing the same Levi’s jeans, the same type of sneakers, and the same tee-shirts they’ve worn for years. They complain about their lack of sex, but when I tell them they need to go spend some money to update their wardrobe, they bitch and moan about how they “can’t afford it right now.”

Yet these same guys are blowing hundreds of dollars a month on porn, video games, Starbucks coffee, going out and buying drinks for chicks who aren’t sleeping with them, and so on.

If you’re serious about attracting strippers (and hot women in general), then you need to do what is necessary to make sure your “look” is on point. Clothes are essential for your image—and it does wonders for your confidence when you go out wearing new clothes and feeling sharp.

2. Being Phased By Her Beauty

A lot of newbies lose their cool with strippers because they’re not used to “gaming” chicks who are this hot and sexual. The best cure for this is experience: once you’ve banged a few strippers and seen them in the morning, hungover and without makeup, you’ll realize they’re only human. Until then, follow these guidelines:

• Never compliment a hot chick on her beauty. Instead, downplay her looks (the word “cute” is one way to do this) and use it to start a conversation about her other qualities—the ones that her customers are never going to appreciate because they’re too busy staring at her tits and ass.

Hot women are tired of guys only judging them on their looks and never noticing their other good qualities. This is especially true with strippers.

You’ll never get anywhere complimenting a girl on her looks when she already knows she’s beautiful. But when you compliment her on her sense of humor, or her knowledge, or the fact that she’s ambitious – now you’re connecting with her on a deeper level.

3. Blowing Your Body Language

This is another mistake guys make in strip clubs. When I’m trying to have sex with dancers I force myself to be aware of everything that my body is doing. My goal is to communicate comfort and confidence at all times. Also be aware of your tone of voice, and how you speak.

A deep voice indicates masculinity—so if you’ve got a naturally high-pitched voice, bring it down a couple of notches. And speak a bit slower than you normally do. Men who are important are not in a hurry to blurt out what’s on their mind. People listen to them and wait for them to speak, because what they say matters.

4. Insulting Her Profession

Some guys make the mistake of trying to “neg” strippers by knocking their profession, as if this conveys confidence or coolness. Well, this is probably the fastest way to get blown off without mentioning that you’ve got a rash on your penis. Don’t knock her job. Refer to her respectfully as a dancer, not a stripper. Refer to the venue as a “gentleman’s club” (sounds classy, doesn’t it?) Like I said before, the goal is to show her that you know how this game works—and that you respect her hustle when she’s dealing with customers. This doesn’t apply to you.

5. Playing Along With Her Routine

Dancers have routines, just as PUA’s (Pick Up Artists) have pick up lines they use on women. The difference is, the end goal of a dancer’s routine isn’t to have sex with you; it’s to get your money. You need to break her out of this mode and get her into regular chat mode.

One of the keys to doing this is avoiding answering her questions (“What’s your name?” “where are you from?” etc). These questions are part of her sales routine—designed to fool you into thinking she’s interested in you, not your money. The typical customer will answer these questions in an attempt to impress the girl, or to try find things he has in common with her.

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Flirting with a shy guy can be intimidating, but shy guys normally make the best boyfriends. Shy guys are usually caring, quiet, intelligent and funny. If you have your eye on a shy guy and you want to bring him out of his shell, there are a few things that you can do to accomplish the task at hand. Shy guys can be intimidating because you will need to guide the conversation. Once they feel comfortable with you they will open up and you can see the type of person they really are. Here is a short guide on how to flirt with shy guys.

Approach Him

Shy guys are not going to approach you. He might try to start a conversation if you have mutual friends, but in general you are going to have to approach him. If you’re not comfortable with approaching guys then you need to be the one that comes out of your comfort zone. Shy guys are usually shy for a reason, so don’t be too aggressive when you approach him. Start off with an easy conversation to break the ice.

Make Him Feel Comfortable

Chances are that the shy guy is not going to be comfortable with you flirting with him at first. Make sure that you aren’t making him uncomfortable with aggressive tactics. Ask him simple questions and see how well he reciprocates. If he’s not asking you questions about your life or what you do then he might not be interested. In most situations a shy guy can spring to life when a girl approaches him, but this isn’t always the case. Go slowly with him, but make sure that he knows you’re interested.

Touching

Touching him is a good way to show interest, but don’t fall all over him. Shy guys love a girl that will touch his shoulder or arm while she’s flirting. Make the touches subtle. Brush against him or touch his arm when you laugh at a joke. Even the subtlest touches will not go unnoticed. Wait for him to touch you back. Usually touching begins with the guy. He will put his hand on your back or touch your arm lightly. However, with a shy guy, you probably need to make the first move when it comes to physicality.

Give Compliments

Compliments are essential for flirting with a shy guy. Compliments work well because they are a quick boost of confidence. Shy guys aren’t looking for girls that are self-involved so when you compliment them you show that you are interested in them instead of yourself. Complimenting their job, appearance or taste in music is easy for breaking the ice and bringing him out of his shell.

Don’t Ask For A Date

Shy guys like women who are upfront, but don’t ask him for a date. Wait until he asks you or make an excuse to give him your phone number. Shy guys are notorious for letting great girls slip through their fingers, so you want to put the ball in his court without making it seem like you are. Use mutual interests as a way to get his phone number or as a way to give him your number. For instance, if you’re both into basketball, say something like “Let me give you my number so we can watch the game together this weekend.” Watching a basketball game together is not a date, but it is a way to get together.

Don’t Play Games

As stated before, shy guys are usually shy for a reason. Whether the reason is a tough childhood or being hurt in the past, shy guys are quick to drop a girl that plays a lot of games. If you are a game player, you need to put all of your nuttiness on hold. Not responding to phone calls in a timely manner or lying to him are off limits. If you really want to flirt with a shy guy and have it go somewhere, don’t play games with him. If he picks up on the fact that you are playing games with him he will probably never call you again.

Learning how to flirt with a shy guy is not difficult, but it does take a different approach than with other guys. Shy guys can be a lot of fun once they feel comfortable enough with you. Approaching shy guys and using the best tactics to flirt with them is vital to establishing a healthy relationship they feel comfortable in. Don’t be too aggressive and you should see an improvement in your flirting abilities with shy guys.

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In my hundreds of trips to strip clubs around the world, I’ve learned that the girls basically fall under one of four categories. Knowing these will help you to grab a date with a stripper (or just get laid by one), so pay attention!

1. The Pros

These chicks have got at least two years of experience under their G-strings. They’re hot, polished, and are experts at selling their sexuality. They smell amazing and almost never have real breasts.

Onstage, they work the pole like an Olympic athlete— they’ve got the splits, acrobatic routines, etc. down cold. They’re hyper-focused on making fast cash, which means they don’t get high or drunk on the job, and they’ll ditch a customer the moment he stops spending.

Be aware, the Pros have heard it all. If they work in a big market like Vegas, they’ve been propositioned by millionaires, movie stars and professional athletes (and they’ve had sex with more than a few). If they work in a club in a small town, they’ve had some of the wealthiest guys in the area try to get in their pants. And they’ve probably given it up—because pros are all about the cash.

You can bang them—but you need to take an original, tactical approach. The second you do anything that paints you as a customer, she’ll only view you as source of cash—and as soon as you stop spending, she’s moving on to the next guy.

Pros will rock your world in bed and give you incredible orgasms, but don’t get emotionally involved with them. You’re not going to change them. (In other words, don’t try to be “Captain Save-A-Ho.”) No matter what they tell you about wanting to go back to school or finding a different job, and say how much they hate stripping, they are addicted to the cash and the lifestyle and are going to keep riding this gravy train as long as they can.

When you’re hanging out with a Pro, expect guys to be calling and texting her cell phone constantly. She’ll tell you it’s “just a friend,” but this is stripper speak for, “I bang him once in a while, because he covers my car payments and buys me expensive stuff.”

2. The Semi-Pros

The Semi-Pros can be just as hot as the Pros, but they haven’t been working as long (less than a year). They haven’t mastered the game yet. They’re still susceptible to the lies some guys throw their way (i.e. the cheese balls who claim they’re movie producers or modeling scouts, and want to “make her a star.”)

These girls haven’t accepted themselves as hard-core, full-time strippers yet, and will tell you about their other plans, the reason they’re saving up their money, etc. In some cases, it’s actually true.

But, many of these girls get addicted to the stripper lifestyle and are unable to walk away from the easy cash. They wind up becoming “Pros”—scrapping their other plans and accepting this as their career for the foreseeable future.

3. The Rookies

You might meet some very hot Rookies in the clubs, especially these days—since the job market sucks and all kinds of girls are taking jobs in the strip clubs to pay their bills. Rookies can be easy targets because they’re still trying to figure out the game. Some really don’t want to be working in the clubs doing stripteases, and are open to meeting a guy who will help them out financially and allow them to quit.

In this lousy job market, some Rookies are women who are straight-up M.I.L.F.s (Mothers I’d Like To F***)—they’re in their 30′s or even 40′s and started working the pole out of financial desperation. With these ladies, you can play on the fact that they’re older than the other girls and are probably a little bit insecure about it.

Other Rookies start stripping at a young age (18-21) and are usually airheads. They flaunt the club rules (showing up late, drunk or stoned), and their stage routines and lap dances look like gymnastic tryouts, cheerleader practices, or some routine they learned from the latest music video.

Real breasts are one sign of a Rookie. She hasn’t been working long enough to pay for silicone airbags, or to meet some customer who buys them for her. The cool thing about Rookies is that they’re not jaded and warped yet by the job. It’s easier to get them talking honestly and openly about themselves, and usually they’re more into hanging out and having drinks than hustling customers. Get her laughing and chatting, buy her a drink or two, and she’ll be in no hurry to get back to the grind.

4. The Skanks

These are the chicks you’d pay to leave you alone. They’re usually hooked on some drug (coke and meth are stripper favorites), and look like they haven’t slept in days. Dark circles under their eyes; ratty-looking, bleached-blond hair; faded tattoos; and twitchy, manic behavior are all signs of the Skank Stripper.

You’ll often find Skanks at the fully nude clubs, where they’re not above doing things onstage that would make a Thai bargirl blush. If you’re going to use drugs as a lure, these girls are good to go—but bang them at your own risk, and do it at a motel. Otherwise, you can expect these train wrecks to show up at your home a few days later, pounding on your front door at 5am because they need to borrow money to get high or bail their boyfriend “Spider” out of jail.

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Nightclubs and bars are the most common places to meet singles, but what if you want to meet singles during the day? Meeting them during the day can feel more natural and build confidence. Most guys like meeting girls during the day because of the games that women play in nightclubs in bars. If you would like to meet singles during the day, there are a few places that you can check out. Having a routine and using a little bit of logic is the best way to accomplish the task at hand. Here are a few ways that you can meet singles during the day.

At Coffee Shops

Almost everybody has their favorite drink at Starbucks, Caribou Coffee or any other coffee shop around your town. The best time to meet singles is during the morning rush. People tend to stop by their favorite coffee shop before work. 7-8:30 is a great time to pop into a coffee shop because there will be a line.

If you have a traditional 9-5 job then you will be dressed in business attire, which makes you look like you have it together. Chat up a girl that is in line with you. If she likes you, she will probably show up the next day at the same time. Keep to this routine and you will start to see regulars at the coffee shop.

At Grocery Stores

Grocery stores are like a hub for singles. Everybody has to buy food and you can easily meet singles at grocery stores with just a bit of detective work. A lot of guys don’t like approaching girls during the day out of fear that they will have a boyfriend. Checking the items in their cart can usually be a telltale sign of whether or not they have a boyfriend.

Look for men’s products with a quick glance before you talk to them. Don’t scour through their stuff, but take a second to look for male shaving cream, face wash or something else that would indicate that they have a boyfriend. If you don’t see these items then she could still have a boyfriend, but if you do see them she definitely does. Approach her with ease and ask if she has used a product in the aisle. This is an easy icebreaker that can lead to a conversation.

At Gyms

Gyms can be a great place to meet singles. With all of the endorphins in the room you will find girls more open to talking. The best way to meet single women at the gym is to use a machine after them. The problem with trying to meet singles at the gym is that they usually have their iPod on. Smile at a girl as she’s getting off of a machine and simply say “hey.” If she doesn’t answer you then her music is too loud. If she does answer you back then you can start talking about the different machines in the gym. Wing it and you’ll find her more open to talking than you thought.

At The Bank

Almost everybody has to go to the bank now and again. Heading to the bank to deposit money or take money out can be a great way to meet singles during the day. If you’re single, it’s best to forgo the convenient services of online banking and get out into the world. It’s too easy to hide behind modern technology.

Instead of using the ATM, go inside and deposit your check with a teller. This will force you to get in line and you never know when another single will be in front or behind you. Say hello to any girl that is waiting with you. Not only could this lead to a potential date, it will help the time pass as you are both waiting.

At A Dog Park

This one only applies to guys that have dogs. It’s no secret that a dog park is a haven for singles. The best thing about a dog park is that you are standing around as your dog plays with the other dogs. This leaves you open to conversation. Chat up a girl that is in the park. A lot of girls go to dog parks in hopes of finding singles. They might never admit it, but it’s true.

Girls love guys who have dogs because it shows compassion. Dog parks allow people with something in common to have light conversations. Ask her about the kind of breed her dog is. Ask her about local pet services or different products that you have tried. This is an easy icebreaker that you can implement with little hassle.

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Meeting somebody that you actually like and think you could have a connection with can put you on Cloud 9. When you meet somebody that you think you could have a future with all you can think about is not screwing it up. Here are some simple dating tips with excellent results to help you keep the guy you like.

The Right Attire

Men like women who have classic looks. This means leaving the animal prints and other out there fashions at home during the date. It doesn’t matter if you work on Wall St. or at McDonalds, there are fashions that are affordable for any income that will allow you to have a classic look. Black dresses and other classic fashions can be found at various outlet stores. Dress up for your date but make sure that you’re dressed appropriately. You won’t want to wear a black dress to an outdoor event.

Realize When He’s A Loser

If a guy picks you up and has no plans then he’s a loser. If a guy picks you up and he’s not dressed appropriately, he’s a loser. If a guy doesn’t ask you questions or only talks about himself, he’s obnoxious and a loser. Don’t date a guy that you have no connection with just because you think that he’s interested in you. You know that it’s not going to work out and it’s best to move on. Realizing that he’s a loser from the get-go is the best way to avoid getting hurt or annoyed during the date.

Ordering Etiquette

One of the best dating tips out there is to monitor what you’re ordering at a restaurant. When a date is going well you should be on your toes about the guy paying for your meal. Only order food, drinks or dessert when the guy orders these. This is a courtesy that a lot of women do not take part in. If you really want dessert, then offer to pay for it. He probably will not let you, but he will love the fact that you tried to pay for yourself. The last thing a guy wants to do is drain his bank account every time he takes you out. If you are still hungry after the date, raid the fridge when you get home.

Don’t Bring Up The Exes

Never, ever, ever bring up exes when you are out for the first couple of dates. This is one of the best dating tips or a reason. Bringing up the fact that your ex cheated on you or left you for your best friend is not something that a guy wants to hear. Baggage is extremely unattractive to men and when you talk about your exes it can come off that you’re not over the relationship yet. If you do bring up your exes, don’t expect another phone call from your date.

Be Easy

No, not that kind of easy. Be easy in the sense that if plans change or the restaurant has a long wait you are not a complete prima donna about it. Men don’t want a woman that they have to be on eggshells with. Comfort on a first date is pretty foreign and there can be shake-ups along the way. However, when you let things roll off your shoulders you can show him that you’re cool and collected. Making a big deal about something that you ordered can have him thinking that you’re high maintenance.

Dating tips can be extremely useful when you meet the right guy. Being easygoing during the date and having the right etiquette throughout is essential to getting a second date. Never go out with a guy that you know isn’t right for you from the beginning and do not talk about your ex-boyfriends during the first couple of dates.

Dressing appropriately for the date is essential and you should know exactly what you are going to do and where you are going beforehand. Taking these dating tips to heart should yield you some pretty great results. If you break them you could find yourself at the bottom of a bin of Vanilla on a Friday night instead of having a fun conversation with a guy who will treat you right.

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You need to be:

1. Confident
2. Interesting
3. Masculine
4. Fun

When you can convey these four qualities to a woman during the first conversation, I guarantee she’s going to want to see you again (or have sex with you that night!).

Yeah, it sounds obvious—you need to be confident and masculine to attract women. Of course. But so few guys actually heed this advice!

Being Too “Nice”

They might read a book like this one and try to be confident and masculine at first, but as soon things start going well with the girl they worry about blowing it. So they revert back to being their “usual selves”—trying to keep the girl interested in them by being super NICE.

(The guy thinks, “If I can prove to her that I’m a nice guy and a gentleman, and that I respect her—and that I’m not looking for sex—then she’ll trust me and want to date me!”)

No. Sooner or later, she’ll want to cut you loose because you’re acting like a typical insecure chump who doesn’t have the balls to act like a man and give her what she’s really looking for: masculinity, confidence, fun and sexual excitement.

By behaving towards women in the “typical” manner, these guys mess up their chances. As for seducing a stripper, you can forget about it; you absolutely must man up if you’re going to capture their interest and get their juices flowing.

I also want you to remember this saying: “The best way to pick up women is to have something better to do than pick up women.”

Have An Actual Purpose In Your Life (Besides Chicks)

Women are attracted to men who have a purpose in life (beyond going out and trying to get laid, or find a girlfriend!). When a guy is passionate about his purpose and focused on achieving goals, that’s sexy. The problem with most guys is that they make a woman their purpose. They’re needy. They’re jealous. They’re worried about losing her. And eventually, they do.

Women want you to be their rock. They want to know they can count on you to make decisions, lead them, and calm them down and get them back on track when they’re going through one of their dramas or mood swings. Women are all over the place emotionally. They’re a swirling sea of emotions, and what they need is a man who can be the rock that their waves crash against.

Be about something. Have interesting hobbies and passions. Set goals for yourself. Have your own opinions, don’t just follow along with the herd.

How To Be A “Masculine Guy”

Be a leader. Lead the conversation. There’s no rule that says you need to talk about whatever topic she brings up. And you’re not required to answer her questions. In fact, I blow off all of a woman’s standard questions. (“Where are you from,” “what do you do,” etc. You’ll always get these questions from strippers because it’s part of their sales routine: they want to build a connection with you before they go for the close (ask you to buy a striptease). You’ve also got to lead physically. I tell girls that I’m hitting on them. I’d love to to be in bed with them.

Men are wired to spread their seed. Women are wired to want to be with men who can provide them with a stable, secure environment in which they can have kids and raise them.

This stuff is happening on a subconscious level. It’s not like while you’re sitting there having a drink with a stripper, she’s thinking, “Hmm, maybe I should let this guy knock me up. He seems like he would provide a stable, secure environment.”

What women (and strippers) are looking for are cues: signals that you have the qualities she is wired to seek in a man. The cool thing is, when you give her these signals (in a way that seems genuine, not phony) she’s going to feel attraction. She has no choice in the matter! It’s in her DNA.

When a man conveys those four qualities in an authentic way, women can’t resist feeling attracted to him—just as you will automatically feel attracted to a young, gorgeous woman with big breasts. You can’t shut off your brain’s “attraction mechanism.” Neither can women.

When you do masculine things in her presence, she senses that you are a confident guy. If you’re confident, you’re going to do things that demonstrate leadership—and then she’ll see you as a guy who can be her “emotional rock” and provide her with the stability she needs to feel safe.

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1. Some Guys Really Do Just Want To Know The Time

Not all approaches are part of the seduction game. Men do approach women that they are attracted to, but a guy that needs the time could also just need to know what time it is. Brushing off every guy that tries to approach you is not the way to go through life. If a guy walks up and tries to ask you a question about a product then be aware that he might just need to know if the product works. When he starts to transition the conversation into where you work, if you’re single or any other personal information be on the lookout for seduction.

2. Speaking Of Time, If He Doesn’t Seem To Have Enough Of It…

A time constraint is one of the most widely used aspects of seduction. The basic concept makes the guy seem limited during his approach. This is the same concept that Internet marketers use to get you to buy a product. They say something like “I can only talk for a second,” which is reminiscent of “for a limited time only.” If a guy tries to pulls this on you, have your guard up. The reason that so many guys use this is because it does work. This is a universal game. What works on you will also work on other women.

3. He Seems More Interested In Your Friends

One of the biggest signs that a guy is seducing you is that he ignores you and goes for your friend. This is a tactic that has gotten a lot of women. What it does is it gets you thinking “Why isn’t he talking to me?” You feel a little rejected so you start vying for his attention instead of him vying for your attention. This is a good method for picking up women and if you look at any nightclub or bar after 11pm you will probably see it. Once the conversation has died a little he will start to talk to you and you will feel special. This is a fake feeling that he has crafted.

4. “Bouncing”

Another method of seduction is called “bouncing.” Bouncing basically involves getting you away from your friends. This is the sign of an experienced expert. He will basically tell you something like “Let’s go to this place for a quick drink.” He is trying to bounce you away from your friends. Seduction is all about putting you a place that you might not feel very comfortable in. If you have never been to a club, bar or restaurant then the most comfortable thing that you have there is him. Be on the look out for this seduction technique when a guy tries it and you won’t get played.

5. He Knows Everything

Does the guy you are talking to seem to have an answer for everything? Is he leading the conversation and saying all the right things? Does it seem too good to be true? If you answered yes to any of these questions then you are probably the prize in a seduction technique. Routines are a way for guys to get enough confidence to talk to you. The reason that they have an answer for everything is because they have done the routine hundreds if not thousands of times. You should start to pick up on his routine throughout the conversation. If you do pick up on it, give a short answer to end the conversation and watch him squirm.

Getting played through a seduction technique is not something that any girl wants to go through. Knowing the signs of seduction is the best way to avoid being a victim in a guy’s routine. Seduction can be fun when you know that you’re being seduced, Making him work for it and then shutting the whole situation down can bruise even the most experienced seduction expert. Take these signs into consideration the next time that you think you’re being seduced.

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Most strip clubs operate on three shift intervals: Days, Swing and Graveyard. Each is a different animal, and has pros as well as cons.

Days

This shift usually runs from about eight in the morning until five in the evening. Day shift dancers are a mixed bag: in a big club you’ll probably find some stunners, but this is also when the less attractive ones work. Some stunners will choose this less lucrative shift because they have personal commitments that prevent them from working evenings—such as kids, or a boyfriend who wants her home at night. The less attractive ones are employed during the day because the club management needs live bodies on the floor in the daytime and they’d rather the more attractive girls be on the floor at night.

Swing

Swing shift runs from about five until one in the morning. This is usually when you’ll find the top-shelf hotties. Also, most new dancers break in on swing shift, which is also known as the “party shift.” As the busiest of all shifts, this one has the most girls, the most customers, and the most challenges for you to deal with. While swing shift dancers might be the hottest, they’re also in higher demand because this is when the club sees the most traffic. This might make it difficult to engage the dancer you want in an extended conversation, since there are other guys willing to shell out money for a private striptease.

Graveyard

In cities where clubs are permitted to be open until very late (such as Las Vegas, where the clubs never close), graveyard shift runs from about midnight until about seven in the morning. If I go to a strip club on a weekend, I hit it late (which in Vegas means after 4am, after I’m through at the bars).

As a local, I don’t want to get caught up in hordes of drunken tourists throwing money around. Better to let the crowd thin out, then show up and work your magic. This applies to whatever city you live in.

I don’t suggest visiting during peak hours. I like to go to the club on slow nights. No matter how strong your dating game is, if the club is packed with guys, her main focus is going to be on making money.

IMPORTANT NOTE: The next time you visit a club that you like, find out the shift changes. (Ask a waitress.) Then, plan your future visits around the shift changes. I like to show up an hour or two before the swing shift (late afternoon-evening) ends and the graveyard shift (late night-early morning) begins.

This way, when I suggest meeting a girl after her shift, I know they’ll be off work soon and I’ll be fresh in their minds when they clock out. On the other hand, if you meet a stripper at the beginning of her shift, her memory of you will be hazy (if she remembers you at all) eight hours later, after she’s consumed a bunch of drinks and entertained twenty other guys. So, timing really is essential.

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Are you sick of struggling to date even average looking women?

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This system will have you doing the opposite of what every other guy is doing, but that’s exactly what you want! Every other guy is TERRIFIED you’ll find out these super effective secrets, because it means they’ll be wiped off the dating map completely. All the girls that were possibly interested in them are going to be interested in YOU and they’ll all be fighting over who gets to date you first!

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Here’s The Secret

Unless a girl is really, really unattractive, she’s going to have tons of emails in her inbox. TONS. From all sorts of guys. As soon as she logs on, she’s going to see tons of messages and she’s going to start deleting them en masse. What happens to most men is their emails get deleted, without the girl ever having read them.

The problem is, that guy could have been Mr. Right and she never would have known it? Why didn’t she read it?

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Pick up lines are some of the worst methods getting a girl’s attention. When you use a line you show that you’re not only desperate, but also highly unoriginal. They are played out and make you come off as a tool. If you have ever thought about using a line, get it out of your head immediately. Here are the top 5 reasons they just don’t work.

1. They’re Generic

“Come here often?” The line doesn’t work primarily because it’s too generic. The fact that you’re using it on a girl that you don’t know shows that you don’t really care about her or have anything original to say. This shows her that you’re not a guy that separates himself from the pack. When you use an original “Hello” or “How are you” you don’t come off as a guy who bombards women at every bar with the same line. “How are you” and “Hello” are pretty common for every day conversation so this gives you a non-threatening way of approaching women.

2. They’re Needy

There is nothing more pathetic than a guy who is desperate. When you use pick up lines, you come off as a guy who only wants to have sex. This can be problematic for a guy who really does want to get to know a girl. When you use a line like “great dress, but it would look better on my bedroom floor,” you sound like a guy who is desperate for sex. Women want a guy that has options. When you use a line you look like you would just say the line to any girl that walks by. Avoid using pick up lines so you don’t look needy.

3. They’re Unoriginal

You know when you walk into a bar or a club and you see every guy or girl dressed the same? How many times do you think a girl has been given a pick up line and actually followed through on it? Women are hit on by guys every day and most guys stick with pick up lines because they are familiar. So when a girl hears you say something that she has heard a couple of hours before, she’s going to be even more put off by you. Pick up lines have been around forever. Chances are, she’s heard it and it’s not going to make her laugh or feel attracted to you.

4. They’re Creepy

How would you feel if some guy walked up to you and said that one about the angel falling from heaven? I would definitely be creeped out. This is exactly how women feel when some stranger walks up to her and delivers a line. Creeping a girl out is not the way to get a phone number. You want to build comfort and rapport with the girl in order to take a relationship to the next level. When you use a  line, you’re going to creep her out and you will probably see it on her face.

5. They’re Not Funny

The fact of the matter is that pick up lines aren’t that funny. They can even be offensive to a lot of women. Do you think that you’re going to get her phone number after offending her? Probably not. It’s best to use a simple opener when approaching women. A pick up line can leave a bad taste in her mouth and leave you feeling like an idiot. If you think that it’s funny, stop yourself anyway.

Pick up lines are usually seen on TV or in movies, but think about the guy that is saying them. Is he the hero of the film or show? More than likely he’s the creep that nobody wants around. Pick lines are generic and will never come off as appealing to women. They have the ability to ruin a situation that could have become favorable with just a simple opener. Some pick up lines even have the ability to offend the girl and send her on her way after the first sentence is spoken.

Even if you do have a hilarious pick up line, she might not get the joke. This could leave you explaining why it’s funny and explaining a joke effectively creates an awkward situation. It’s best to leave you pick up lines at the door when you’re out approaching women. Use an environmental opener or mention something about her clothing to get a conversation started properly.

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1. Upper Class Adult Clubs

When a strip club has valet parking, this is your first sign that it’s an “upper class” establishment. Once you’re inside, the presence of bathroom attendants are another indicator (one of the most useless and annoying jobs ever created).

This means you can expect to pay a cover charge of at least $20 and drinks will average around $8. On the plus side, the talent pool will be loaded with ridiculously hot women.

In upper-class strip clubs in Vegas—the city that has this down to a science— I’ve actually encountered some of my favorite porn stars working among the dancers. If that sounds crazy, just consider the financials!

These chicks might make $1,000 to spend a day shooting a scene for a porn flick, getting pounded for hours under hot lights in every imaginable position. In the club, they can easily make twice that amount without having to fuck anyone. And, it’s a great place to meet wealthy customers who are looking to pay her for “full service” when she gets off of work. (Many porn stars do “escort work” on the side.)

I’m guessing that a lot of porn stars you might recognize are working in the strips clubs in Los Angeles and Las Vegas right now. The porn industry is seriously hurting due to the rise of internet file-sharing sites, where you can download millions of hours of porn for free. This is killing the porn DVD market, which has led to less movies being made for tighter budgets. So, don’t act surprised when you see one of your favorite “stars” walking up to you and offering you a lap dance!

Even some of the waitresses in these upper-class clubs are 9’s and 10’s. The staff will have a professional attitude and understand the concept of “customer service,” unlike the scary-looking ex-cons who run the door (and even work as managers) at lower-end clubs.

Expect a ratio of fake to real breasts somewhere around 10:1, and top-shelf liquor that is not watered down. These clubs accept credit cards, but usually the fees are so high (ten to twenty percent range) that you’d be a fool to not be carrying cash. Some upper-class clubs feature “shower shows” onstage or lube, mud or oil wrestling matches pitting strippers against each other. Now that’s entertainment!

The advantage of upper class clubs is twofold. First, there some insanely hot women to check out. Second, there are plenty of second and third-tier strippers who are still extremely sexy, but aren’t getting a whole lot of attention compared to the A-listers. The slightly lower-tier girls are the ones that I like to target. They’d be superstars in the lower-end clubs. But here, they’re small fish in a big pond and need to work hard to make their money.

They’re a little bit insecure, too. They’re beautiful, but they’re always comparing themselves against the A-Team “turbo hottie” hustlers who are the superstars where they work. This means they’ll be OK with sitting down with you for a drink and some conversation, without trying to use high-pressure sales tactics. This is when you will work your magic.

2. Middle Class Clubs

The middle-class strip club is similar to the upper-class joints in many respects, with the following exceptions: the fake breasts to real breasts ratio leans more towards the real (but not in a good way); if there is a bathroom attendant, there isn’t enough room for him and he’s always in the way (which makes him even more of a pain in the ass); there’s usually no valet; and while the talent pool contains some stunners, you also occasionally see dancers you wouldn’t sleep with even after twenty shots of tequila.

The main difference, basically, is that these places are cheaper than the upper-class clubs.

3. Lower Class Strip Clubs

The lower-class strip club can provide plenty of good, cheap fun, despite the funky smell and the desperate condition of many of the dancers. You can sense that more than a few of the girls are working to support children and a Tony Montana-sized drug habit. You will often find, however, that there is one “big fish” working in this small pond: a total stunner who chooses to work here rather than in one of the bigger clubs, because this place has less competition.

There are other reasons why hotties will occasionally choose to work in lower-class clubs. I once had sex with a super-hot Filipina dancer at a grimy little club located a few blocks from the Vegas Strip. She could have easily been a star at one of the big clubs in town. But she lived with her family—who had no idea what she was actually doing for a job. She worked an early evening shift because she had a 1:00 am curfew. She was intimidated by the bigger clubs and all of their bitchy “pro” dancers. So, she chose to work at this place.

My point is, you never know what gems you might discover by exploring the lower-end clubs. I love these joints, personally. The girls have less competition among themselves—and so do you. These places do not normally attract high rollers. If you’ve got game, you shouldn’t have a problem lining up dates with the girls outside of the club. They’ll be happy to hang out with you for a drink or two. Normally, they’re sitting with fat old guys with bad breath who are trying to feel them up.

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Every new relationship takes time to hit its stride. If you’ve been dating a new girl for a little while the two of you are probably wondering where the relationship is going. Many of us have been deceived in the past. Saying one thing and meaning another is pretty common in relationships. So how do you know if she really is in love?

The answer is not so simple, but there are key signs that you can look for. The majority of the time, determining if she is in love with you can be done pretty quickly.

1. She Does What You Want To Do

A girl that puts you ahead of herself is a sure sign that she is in love. This doesn’t mean that she’s going to jump in front of a bullet, but if she doesn’t mind doing something that you want to do instead of what she wants to do she’s probably in love. Women that are not experiencing that aren’t going to take an interest in your life, friends or family.

They will usually not budge when it comes to the movie they want to see or a dinner date preference. If she is in love, she will be as accommodating as you are. Remember that relationships are partnerships and neither of you should get your way every time.

2. She Surprises You

Being in love with somebody is all about the little things. If your girlfriend comes home with a little surprise for you every once in a while, they are probably in love. This doesn’t have to be some grandiose gift, but if she saw something at the store that made her think about you and she bought it, you can assume that she’s in love.

Surprising you with something that you’ve talked about in the past but haven’t gotten for yourself is a clear sign. Surprising you with a dinner or a night out to a ball game that you’ve wanted to see is another key indicator to keep in mind.

3. She Gets Physical With You

The physical relationship can be just as important as the emotional relationship. When a girl is experiencing those feelings, she will probably not be able to stop touching you. This doesn’t mean that she’s having sex with you every five seconds, but that she takes your hand, runs her fingers through your hair or curls up next to you on the couch.

When a girl is getting physical with you, there is trust. You should be able to tell if she’s falling for you based on the amount of physicality that she’s displaying.

4. She Knows What Makes You Tick

Have you ever had a horrible day and then come home and everything seems like it’s going to be all right? When a woman is love with you she can almost sense what’s making you grouchy and how to make it better. Believe it or not, most women know how to make a man happy. Choosing to make you happy is another story.

When a woman is falling for you, she will know exactly what it takes to bring you 180 degrees back to your fun loving self. Whether this is through flirting, encouraging words or a pat on the back, a girl that is head over heels will know exactly what makes you tick.

5. She Talks About The Future

The future is something that the both of your should be thinking about. If she loves you, she will bring up the future. The future doesn’t have to be kids, marriage or the white picket fence. This could be a trip that’s a month down the road or holiday plans a couple of months in advance.

When a woman is head over heels, she will talk about the future to try to gauge what you think about it. When you’re in love with her, you should also be taking about the future. Planning the future is a very clear sign that she has fallen for you.

Knowing when a girl is love with you can be a blessing. Having the ability to gauge whether or not she is happy in the relationship can give you an edge. There is nothing worse than telling somebody that you love them and then having them stare at you blankly. Knowing these signs should help you recognize how important you are to your girlfriend to move the relationship forward.

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Everyone wants one (or two, or three if you’re a rock star) of their own, but how do you get them? If a lack of hot college girls is your problem, take a look at some of the best dating tips around for meeting ladies at school Sit down, strap in and make sure you’ve got condoms, because we will have you knee deep in college hotties in no time!

Building Your Social Circle

So how do you get the hot girl of your dreams? Build your social circle first. Be the guy everyone wants to be with. You know that expression, “the life of the party?” That’s you, or it should be. We’re not saying be a clown or act like a train seal, but be confident and be the person people always want to be around. When everyone wants to be around you, inevitably, you will find yourself surrounded by hot girls.

Be less of an outsider. Once you’ve got that social circle going and they are at least associated with you in some way, you’re no longer some random creepy guy hitting on them. You’re now a friend of a friend, and someone who has a certain reputation and trust level. Once you have the trust level, you’re in.

Go to events, get in with fun positive people and let their good vibes rub off on you. Events are crucial. If you want to fish, you need to go to where the fish are. Going to a lake where tons of fishermen are trying to fish a pond, it’s great odds, no matter how many fish are in the lake. Generally, there won’t be that many fish in the lake, because so many people are fishing in it.

If you go to a lake that is teaming with fish and you’re the only fisherman (or one of the only fishermen) there, how good do you think your odds of catching a fish is? A lot better than it was. This is actually one of the most essential dating tips you’ll ever learn. Find out what kind of fish you’re looking for and find out what pond they are in and then go there. Yoga class, theatre, choir, you name it.

And when people have great vibes, people are drawn to them. You need those people in your life and they need to be your friends. They can only make your life better. In every way.

Don’t Hit On Everyone

Keep it casual, don’t hit on every hot girl. This isn’t brain surgery. You’re not trying to balance the budget or eradicate the national debt. You’re trying to hook up with hot girls. Don’t be too serious and relax. And be selective. If you hit on anything that moves, guess how that makes you look? Wanna guess? It’s not good, that’s a hint. Actually, it’s the answer, but whatever.

Use facebook, that’s why it’s there. Facebook was literally invented to hook up with hot college chicks. Social media is your friend. Use it. Hitting a girl up on Facebook can sometimes be less threatening that going up and asking for her number. Almost everyone accepts friend requests, so once she does, you’re in.

Go to class. If there is a hot girl in your class, sit next to her. Ask her for a pen, ask if she has a study guide for the exam. Better yet, ask her to study with you. Do something to start the conversation. Anything. Well, maybe not anything. No cheesy pickup lines. Allowed. Ever. No exceptions. Seriously. We mean it.

Ask her out to a lunch date on or off campus, that can be a fun, low pressure way to get the ball rolling. You should also go to fun crazy parties. Girls there have had a few drinks, they’re more relaxed, and more approachable

Bring Something To The Table

It’s also really important to have something to offer. Hot girls can have anyone they want. So why would they want you? To get the girl, you have to know who you are and what you bring to the table. You have something going for you that no one else on the planet does. Figure out what that is and develop it.

Join clubs, have hobbies. Hot girls like to see a man with balance. Why? Because if he’s got a lot going on and he’s got his act together, he’s much less likely to be needy and all over her (and not in a fun way)

Basically, it’s all about disarming the girl. Hot girls are always on def-con five. They have security walls up to protect themselves from losers, rapists, creeps and Tommy Lee. If you want to get in her pants or heart or mind, you’ll need to get her to lower the shields first.

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1. Start Out Slow – Very Slow

Sexting is all about anticipation. If you rush into it you’re going to ruin all anticipation. Have you ever seen a stripper yank all of her clothes off in first 20 seconds of dancing? Of course not. You want to build up to the main event with your girlfriend or wife. A great way to start out is to ask them what they’re wearing. This gets them into the frame of mind to get descriptive. If you’re texting your boyfriend or husband, you can text them the same thing. When they text back, tell them how much you love that outfit and then make a physical reference. “I love how your ass looks in that dress” or something similar.

2. Plan What You’re Going To Say

Make sure that you’re comfortable with the things that you’re going to say. Remember that you will have to see your partner at some point so you don’t want to say anything that is too embarrassing or out there. For women, this isn’t really a problem. Men can handle, and will probably welcome, complete filth. However, men should watch it. It’s all too easy to fall into the sexting trap and send something that will turn her off or creep her out from the comfort of your cell phone’s keyboard. Think about what you’re saying before you send the text.

3. Lead Up To The Dirty Talk

Sexting can get very dirty, but lead up to it with anticipatory messages. “Wish you were here right now” or “I can’t wait to come home” can lead to a lot of anticipation. If your partner sends you something like this, ask them “Why?” This can lead into sexting easily. After your partner has texted you “Why?” follow up with something that is not necessarily dirty, but more loving. “I need you right now” or something like that is enough to get the message across without the attachment of a picture of your penis.

4. Actually Use Dirty Talk

Once you have established where the conversation is going it’s time to get into the grunt of it. “My cock is so hard” or “My pussy is so wet” works well as a follow up. If your partner is really sexual, they are going to follow up to your message with something even dirtier.

5. Escalate It

Sexting require escalation. Starting off slow and bringing the sexual level up is essential. You must escalate the sexting until you have a good rhythm going with the messages. Wait a little while between the texts. 3-5 minutes between the texts will build anticipation. Can you picture your partner sitting at his or her desk at work staring at the phone waiting for dirty talk to pop up? If not, then you’re not doing it right!

6. Send Pictures

Picture messaging has taken the cell phone industry by the balls. This is also a staple of sexting. When the time is right in the conversation you can ask for a picture. Tell your partner to go into the bathroom and take a dirty picture for you. This works much more for women than men. Surprisingly, women aren’t as likely to ask for a picture of your dong. There was a line in Seinfeld that pretty much applies to this: “Men are utilitarian. They’re built like Jeeps.”

The male body can be sexy, but it’s nothing compared to a woman’s body. Guys should remember that what they are saying is going to play much more of a part than a picture of them standing in a mirror with their penis in their hand.

Sexting can bring anticipation for the moment that your partner walks through the door in the afternoon. However, you need to know what you’re doing before you can get your partner turned on. Couples that sext often have better sex because text messages can be less personal than a face-to-face conversation. Having the ability to express your sexual desires through a phone can help you open up. Follow these guidelines and you’ll find your partner rushing home to fulfill their cravings.

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Schedule The Date

Sounds pretty simple, right? Well, too many dates fall prey to guys forgetting times, where the girl lives and or what day the date is supposed to be on. Don’t miss out on an opportunity for a future relationship because you have forgotten pertinent information. Once you have scheduled the date, write it down on a calendar or set a reminder on your phone. Hopefully, the girl is good enough that you won’t forget any of this information. However, times and dates can get lost in translation. Make sure that she knows when the date is supposed to occur also.

Make Reservations

This might not apply if you’re simply going out for a drink or heading out to the lake for a day of hiking, but if you’re going to a restaurant, get a reservation. The last thing that you want to do is show up on a Saturday night to find out that there’s a 45-minute wait for a table. Double check the reservation the day of the date to make sure that the restaurant has not made a mistake. You’ll be glad that you did.

Invest In A GPS

How many times have you tried to wing it when looking for a store? This isn’t something that you want to do on a first date. Use a GPS and key in the address an hour before you have to be there. The GPS should give you the estimated time of arrival for the location. This can keep you on schedule. Plan on being a few minutes early. Don’t be 15 minutes early, but a couple of minutes gives you time if there is traffic or accident on the way.

Have Mints/Gum On Hand

It doesn’t matter if you’re going to a restaurant or just a walk. Being fresh is key and you’re breath can deteriorate over time. Make sure that you have something to combat this situation. The last thing that you want is to have a sewer system in your mouth when you lean in for a good night kiss.

Remember Your Wallet

You would think this is a given, but there are time when we get so flustered that we rush out of the house without our wallet or our credit card. Make sure that you have your wallet and all of the pertinent methods of paying for the date with you before you leave the house. If you have recently cancelled a credit card, take it out of your wallet. The last thing you want is to have the waiter come back saying that your card was declined.

Dress Appropriately

The date will really determine what you are going to wear. Are you going to a swanky concert or a find restaurant? Dress accordingly and make sure that the clothing is clean. Iron your shirts and pants if needed. Be aware of details that will make you stand out from previous dates she’s had. Don’t choose a shirt with a ring around the collar. Wear a tie if needed. A sport coat is a great way to show that you know how to dress for a formal date. Make sure that she’s aware of any specific attire that she needs. If you’re taking her paddle boating, make sure that she is wearing sneakers. If you’re going to a nice restaurant, make sure that she knows it so she can dress accordingly.

Make After Date Plans

If everything is going well, you might want to have a plan in place for after the date. Dinner is a great way to spend some time with a date, but the restaurant is going to want their table back at some point during the night. A change of venue is exciting anyway. Have somewhere that the two of you can go after the initial phase of the date if it’s called for. Choose something that you will both enjoy. Something as easy as a cup of coffee at a local brewer can work well.

First dates can be dreadful if you aren’t prepared. By following these guidelines you should be well on your way to a second date.

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Beautiful women, who are constantly being hit on, are naturally going to put up barriers when they get the sense that a guy is sexually interested in them. (This is sometimes referred to as a “bitch shield.”)

What Happens When You Start A Conversation With A Hot Girl

So when a random guy tries to start a conversation with a hot chick, one of two things will happen:

1. If she is completely uninterested in the guy, she will ignore him or blow him off as soon as possible. (“Nice to meet you, but I need to go find my friends…”)
2. If she’s having fun talking to the guy, or finds him interesting or attractive in some way, she will begin to screen him. She will use certain questions and behaviors to elicit responses from him. The manner in which he responds will allow her to form a judgment of him: is this a guy she can picture herself having sex with (or dating), or does he lack the qualities that she is screening him for?

(If so, she might continue talking to him out of politeness, and even give her phone number if he requests it, but there’s no way she’s ever going to have sex with him. She’s already made up her mind about that.)

Your goal, then, is to control the conversation so that you don’t give women the chance to start screening you. You want to “turn the tables” so that you are the one screening them.

How To Get To Where YOU Are “Screening” HER

Remember this—because it applies in and out of the strip clubs. The main things a woman “screens” you for are your status and value. If she senses that your status and value are lower than hers, she knows she doesn’t stand to gain anything by being with you. So she won’t be interested.

If she feels that your status and value are higher than hers, she’ll want to keep talking to you—and she’ll begin to feel attraction, if you push the right buttons.

This has nothing to do with how much money you’ve got, or what kind of car you drive. There are much more important ways in which any guy can demonstrate status and value.

For example, if you give a stripper (or any girl, for that matter) the impression that you know other people at the club, and you’re familiar with her profession and how the whole “game” works, you’re conveying a higher status than the typical customer.

If you tease her during the conversation (instead of trying to kiss her ass) and qualify her (which means you say things that indicate you’re not so impressed by her, and want to find out if she measures up to your standards), you’re also showing status.

Give her VALUE

Providing value means she can tell she will gain something, or improve her situation, by hanging out with you. (In a strip club, a guy’s “value” normally means what he’s carrying in his wallet—but you’re going to attract women by different means, and in a more powerful way.)

Bringing value can be as simple as making her laugh and feel relaxed with you. Other ways of providing value include getting her to share her ambitions and goals (strippers always have some other “plan” for their lives), and encouraging her to go after that goal.

You want women to feel that if they spend time with you, you’re going to make their lives fuller and more exciting, and you’re going to help them grow and better themselves. That’s super-valuable stuff.

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A kiss tends to be an oversight for some men. We want to get to the main event and rush the foreplay. The problem with this is that women like kissing just as much as sex. When you’re a bad kisser, women instantly shut down. If you’re wondering why you’re not going on more second and third dates, it could be because you’re a bad kisser. Being great at kissing can get you second and third dates based on this fact alone. So if you’re tired of getting the run-around from women and you’re willing to put a little practice into kissing, you can start out with these suggestions.

Lips

Obliviously it goes without saying that your lips are the most important part of kissing. However, a lot of guys forgo taking care of them before they go on a date. During the fall and winter months, lips can be bombarded by colder weather. Chapped and cracked lips are not sexy. Always carry lip balm with you to cut down on having chapped and cracked lips. Nobody wants to start kissing you when your lip could split and start bleeding. Applying lip balm to your lips once every hour will have them repaired in about a day.

Mirroring

Have you ever watched a couple kissing each other? When you watch a couple kiss, they are usually mirroring each other’s actions. When a guy puts his arms around the girl’s waist, she puts her arms around his waist. When the guy turns to the left to kiss his girlfriend, she turns to the left. Mirroring is compliance. This only occurs when the girl is comfortable with the guy. If she is not comfortable while kissing you, you should be able to feel it.

Escalation

Have you ever seen a guy go in for that kiss with too much momentum? This can be one of the most cringe-worth moments in a guy’s life. Kissing should be able escalation. You want to start slow. Barely touch her lips with you own and then escalate the situation further by kissing a little stronger every 5-6 seconds. When you start out too fast, you ruin the moment. Starting out slow is essential for getting her in the right mood.

Don’t Be Too Stiff

If you’re too stiff while you’re kissing, she will probably not be into it. Locked knees, hands gripping her waist like Stallone in Cliffhanger and a stiff neck are not what you want. Be loose, but firm. Hold her while you’re kissing, but don’t pull her into you so she can’t breath. You want to have mobility to distribute your weight while kissing. Moving your head and rocking back and forth are staples of good kissing. If you’re too stiff she won’t be able to mirror your movements. Remember that you’re leading during the kiss and she is supposed to be mirroring you. It shouldn’t be the other way around.

The Tongue

The tongue is another part of kissing that can be confusing. Yes, using your tongue is a lot of fun, but you shouldn’t be Reptile from Mortal Kombat. Keep that thing in your mouth until it’s time to use it. Don’t immediately shove your tongue into her mouth. This goes back to escalation. You want to ease into using your tongue. When implementing the tongue into kissing you want to gauge the situation based on her reciprocation. If you’re using your tongue and she’s not using it back, you might want to hold off until she feels more comfortable.

Hands

Your hands are a good way to pull the girl in closer and turn it on fairly quickly. If you’re hands are roaming around her body or her breasts, she could get uncomfortable. This also comes back to mirroring. When you start kissing, feel free to move your hands around her back and bring them up to her neck or cheeks. If she starts to pull back or she stops you from moving your hands around her, stop moving them immediately. She might be comfortable kissing her, but not comfortable with mauling her with your hands.

Finishing

Eventually the kissing will stop. When you are stopping you don’t want it to come to a grinding halt. Taper off from the kissing to tease her and leave her wanting more. If you stop immediately you will ruin the whole kiss. Pull your lips away slowly and take a second or two to allow the air to clear. You won’t want to pull away and then just start talking or walk away. Finish strong!

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Nobody likes to be lead on. Usually the man is the one that will lead a girl on, however, this can happen the other way around. Leading a fella on can hurt him and his ego. When a man is lead to believe that the relationship is something that he didn’t expect, he can get angry and you might never hear from him again. If you have been seeing a fella and you’re not too sure if you’re leading him on, there are a few ways that you figure it out. Here are some signs that you’re leading him on.

You Need Something

Some girls are experts in the damsel in distress role. The thing about this is that men love to swoop in and save a girl from any situation. If you need something, it’s okay to call a friend, but helping out a girl makes a man feel like a man. Make sure that he knows you just need help and that you aren’t interested in him.

He’s A Fallback

Some men have instant chemistry with you while others take time to warm up. If you find yourself calling him when you have nothing to do, he might see it as a sign that you’re interested. If you find yourself using him a fallback, you might want to cut it out. Men tend to make excuses for girls that call them every once in a while. They might think that you’re busy and this is the first chance that you’ve had to call them.

You Haven’t Talked About The Relationship

Relationships can rely on signals to progress. However, signals can be very confusing. If you haven’t talked about your relationship, you might be leading him on. When you talk about the relationship, you give it definition. Defining the relationship lays all of your cards out on the table and leaves no room for confusion.

Your Friends Tell You You’re Leading Him On

Sometimes it takes an outside viewpoint and some good dating advice to let you know what you’re doing. If your friends are telling you you’re leading him on, they probably have good reason. Whether it be that they detect something that you don’t or they have inside knowledge that the fella likes you, listen to your friends. In this case, it’s best to have the talk with him and let him know that you’re not interested.

You Pull Away When Things Get Real

Do you make excuses for why you can’t have dinner with him or go out on a real date? If so, you might be leading him on. When a fella offers to take you out to dinner or to a show, more than likely it’s not a friendly invite. He’s interested and he wants you to go with him. If you make up fake excuses on why can’t go with him, you’re obviously not interested. Tell him that you’re not interested to diffuse the situation.

You Only Call Him For Sex

This can actually be an extension of #5. If you’re sleeping with him and he asks you to spend more time with him out of the bedroom, you are definitely leading him on. Sex to a man is one of the most important aspects of a relationship. If the sex is good, he’s probably wondering how he can make the relationship official. Explain to him that you are not looking for anything serious and he might actually be more receptive to a friends with benefits situation.

You’re Too Flirtatious

Flirting is one thing, but if you’re flirting too much, you might be sending the wrong signals. It’s best to keep the flirting to a minimum. Touching a guy’s shoulder or telling him how attractive he is can lead him on quickly. Make sure that you’re not make flirtatious gestures when are around him. He might get the wrong idea and this could cause a rift between the two you.

Leading a guy on can be damaging to any relationship. If you are friends with a fella or you’re sleeping with him, it’s best to make sure that he’s knows what the relationship actually is. When a man likes you, he will bend over backward to do what is needed to make you his girlfriend. Because of this power that women have over men, they tend to take it too far without even realizing it. Take a careful inventory of how you interact with your male friends and listen to the people around you if they say that you could be leading him on.

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The allure of a more mature woman can be intoxicating to younger men. Older women have more experience, know exactly what they want and they can be a lot of fun. Men in their early to mid 20s love older women because they tend to be more mature and straightforward both in the bedroom and out of it. Women in their early 20s like to play head games and beat around the bush in what they want out of a relationship. Older women take all of the hassle out of dating and are usually established financially and emotionally. If you would like to know how to seduce a mature woman but don’t know how to engage them, there are a few things that you should know beforehand.

Forget Everything You Think You Know About Women

One of the biggest aspects of using seduction on younger girls is using flare. Money, power, job titles all come into play when you are seducing a younger girl. This doesn’t apply to older women. Seducing a mature woman doesn’t require a position at a high paying law firm or a sports car. More than likely, an older girl will be financially secure. In fact, they will probably make more money that you do. This is okay. You just have to learn how to use your other attributes to appeal to them. Forget everything that you think you know about women when you are trying to seduce an older girl. Talk to them as you would a friend or a colleague, but keep sexual tension.

Have Confidence

Older women can be intimidating. This is not a new concept. Many men get hung up on whether or not a mature woman would actually date them instead of the other way around. A woman in her 40′s wants confidence. Attraction is not built through physicality alone. You must be confident and show her what you have to offer other than what is in your pants. Appeal to her emotional side. Challenge her thinking in conversation. All women want a challenge, but to seduce an mature woman you need to take it to the next level. Do everything that you wouldn’t do with a younger girl. Talk about politics, religion or other controversial issues without allowing the conversation to get heated. This shows your confidence and will separate you from the rest of the guys trying to gain her affection.

Be Established

Yes, she’s established, but that doesn’t mean that she’s going to pay your bills. Older women don’t want a leach. They want somebody that is going to hold their own. This doesn’t mean that you need to be a millionaire; it just means that you need to be in a position where you can pick up the bill every once in a while. Show her that you are ambitious and that you know what you want out of life. Younger guys tend to use older women as a crutch. You want to separate yourself from the other guys trying to date her.

Be Mature

Everything about you should present an image of maturity. The way that you dress, the way that you speak, the food that you eat and the way that you handle yourself are all taken into account when trying to seduce. The days of bummy t-shirts and ripped pants should be over. Tuck in your shirt and get a decent pair of dress shoes when taking them out. Maturity is in the details. Ironing your clothes, keeping your car and your home clean are all signs that you are mature. Take pride in yourself and in her. This will show the ultimate amount of maturity.

Be Physical Without Being Creepy

Seducing an older girl is all about comfort. The age difference could make the situation awkward from the beginning. However, if you are getting the vibe from an older woman, be as physical as possible without being creepy. Don’t touch her legs at first. Go for the lower back, shoulders or arms to start out. These are key stepping-stones to get you into the majors. Older women love sex, but they need to feel comfortable first. Don’t mess it up by getting too touchy right off the bat. Build rapport and then you can start getting bold.

An more mature woman is sophisticated and can be a lot of fun. They will challenge you in the way that you see yourself. Presenting yourself as an equal is the best way to seduce a mature woman. Although you may not have the financial means to be an equal with her, an emotional equality will be enough to get you through to the next round.

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Body Language That Women Don’t Like

It has been said that 80% of all communication comes from body language. This is a form of non-verbal communiqué that has the ability to instantly turn women off. When you use the right actions, you send a message to women telling them you are confident and available. When you use the wrong actions, the thought of dating you can go out the window in just a couple of seconds.

If you are not completely aware of your non-verbal communication, you could easily lose her. When you implement the right kind of non-verbal communication, you will be able to instantly show your qualifications as a potential date. Here are some examples of body language that women don’t like.

Eye Contact

Eye contact is essential to showing your confidence. When you make eye contact with a woman, the most natural thing to do is look away. If you instantly look away, the amount of confidence being conveyed goes through the floor. The best way to overcome this is to make contact with the woman and then keep the eye contact until she looks away. This will usually occur within a couple of seconds. When she looks away first, it shows submission.

Here is a guideline:

• Make eye contact with her.
• Wait for her to reciprocate.
• Maintain the eye contact.
• Wait for her to look away.
• You look away.

Posture

Posture can be a magnet to women. Do you remember your teachers showing you how to properly sit in a chair during grammar school? Regress back to the 3rd grade and implement this back into your life. Posture is non-verbal communication that can turn women off from a distance. Slouching while sitting or standing does not convey confidence. Posture can convey power. The best way to overcome bad posture is to suck in your stomach a little and hold your head up. Arch your back slightly to pull back your shoulders.

This might feel a little strange at first, but it works. Try to make yourself look as big as possible. Women are not attracted to men who slouch. Just think, how attractive was Al Bundy?

Fidgeting

Fidgeting is definitely something that turns women off. When you fidget you suggest nervousness. Women don’t want a man that is nervous when they are talking to them. This can apply to when you approach her and during the opening conversation. Making really fast movements and playing with your belt or zipper instantly shows that you are submissive to her power. The most frequent signs that a girl is into you involve HER playing with her hair, playing with jewelry or any other nervous tick.

So when you think about it, this role should be reversed. Instead of you making these movements, you should be making her fidget. When you are talking to a woman, have a mental picture of a hypnotist. A hypnotist makes very slow and calculated movements. These are there for a reason. These movements make the person being hypnotized anticipate the movements. This brings mysteriousness to your personality and will convey dominance.

The Tone Of Your Voice

The tone of your voice is technically “language” but it’s also a form of body language that can turn women off. There is a certain tone that must be applied when talking to women. If you have ever taken a public speaking class, you should know that your voice sends a message. This is applicable to talking to women also. Weak and squeaky voice tone is not attractive. There is a breathing exercise that will help you out. Breath in to fill your stomach instead of your lungs. Talk as you breath out to achieve a deeper voice.

Body language is essential to showing that you are a confidence man with a lot to offer both sexually and from a personality standpoint. When you use body language that turns women off, you aren’t getting the message through. When you fully implement the right actions, you could see a rise in the amount of women that respond to you in a positive manner.

Eye contact is your first point of interaction. Once she has submitted to your eye contact, you can approach with confidence. Use the correct posture in your walk when you approach her and she will be instantly open to a conversation. Make slow movements while you are talking to her and watch for the signs of fidgeting. Implement your deeper voice tone and she will be putty in your hands.

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• Be A Flirting Expert With These Easy Tips (Video)
• Flirting With Text Messages – 3 Texts A 3rd Grader Could Have Written
• How To Flirt With Women (Video)
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• 5 Awkward Ways To Flirt With A Woman
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• How To Seduce A Woman (Video)

You can also pick up some excellent suggestions from our best ever flirting and seduction articles! Once you read through these, you’ll have a better handle on how to flirt and seduce, so the next time you go out, you’ll be ready to play the game!

• 7 “Innocent” Words That Turn Women On
• 5 Tips For Sexy Flirting That Doesn’t Go Too Far (Video)
• How To Talk A Woman Into Bed (Video)
• The 5 Hardest Ways To Get A One Night Stand
• 7 Ways To Get Laid By Being Just A Friend

We’ve also found an amazing resource this year that can help you improve your dating game like you never thought possible. If you’ve always struggled with being comfortable around women, picking up women or dating them, this resource is something you definitely don’t want to pass up. It’s one of the best dating resources we’ve come across and we wouldn’t recommend anything else if you want to learn how to flirt, how to date and how to become a Casanova – really, it’s that good!

• Pandora’s Box (teaches you everything about dating, from prepping yourself beforehand to changing your attitude to what to say when you’re on a date – this guide doesn’t leave anything out!)

Make 2012 a year to remember by utilizing these great tips and techniques! You’ll be the one all the girls are flocking to every time you go out and all the other men will wonder what your secret is!

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Most women are very concerned with their self-image. Although self-image can directly affect ego and self-esteem, we don’t always make the right decisions to support how we really think of ourselves. The days of women hiding their sexual prowess are over. Society has embraced the concept that women like sex and can get it whenever they want. But when does being a forward woman who loves sex turn into a woman who is after only one thing? If your friends have ever called you by that name, you know how damaging this word can be. The line between being a woman who embraces her sexuality and a complete slut is not as fine as you may think. Here are a few questions to ponder when determining if you are one or not.

Have You Ever Had A One-Night Stand?

One night stands can be a lot of fun if both parties understand that is simply “is what it is.” But if you’ve had more than 5, you’re teetering on the line of being a slut. If you have never had a one-night stand then you probably aren’t a slut. Almost every woman has had one compromising night in her life. It’s not the end of the world and it certainly doesn’t brand you with The Scarlet Letter. Most women who have had a single one-night stand regret it or look back and laugh. This is normal and you shouldn’t get bogged down with it.

Workplace Romances

The workplace is for work. If you have ever had a workplace romance, you might want to consider closing your legs in the future. Sleeping with a guy that you work with has its appeals. Because it’s heavily frowned upon, the thought can be exciting. Flirting with a guy at work endangers your professionalism. If you have just flirted with a guy at work then you’re probably in the clear. If you have engaged in a sexual relationship with a guy at work then you could just be a slut. Women who enjoy their sexuality progressively are professional women. They don’t mix work and play. Giving into the urges of a workplace relationship could be the sign that you’re looking for.

Your “Number”

Although your number is not the only factor in determining whether or not you’re a slut, it does play its part. Typically, a woman in her early 30′s should not have more than 10-11 guys on her bedpost. If you have more than that then you could possibly be one. If you have 20 or more guys under your belt, you are one. The general rule is that you should not be with more than 3 guys per year. If you’re with more than 3 guys per year, you’re probably not engaging in loving relationships. Take a step back and look at the relationships that you have been in over the last couple of years.

Would You Date The Ex Of A Friend?

This one is kind of tricky. Sure, your friend dated some guy while you were in college. But she’s married now with kids, so what’s wrong with dating him? In this specific scenario, there’s nothing wrong with going out with the guy. If your friend and their ex broke up 2 months ago and you’re all set to date him, then you’re just a slut. The exes of friends are not the best guys to go after in the first place because it puts a stain on your friendship. Your friend may not be comfortable with you being where they have been. If you would never even parish the thought, then you’re not one.

Your Average Saturday Night

What is your average Saturday night like? Do you hang around the house in sweats catching up on recorded shows or are you out at the latest clubs trolling for guys to have a cheap thrill with? Going out on a Saturday night is not an indicator of a “lady of the evening,” but your intentions can be. Heading out to a bar with a couple of friends and checking out some of the guys can be harmless. If you seem to always find yourself in a cab with Joe Nobody after last call…well, you can guess where this is going.

A good girl will not always get the guy, but a slut will never be taken seriously. If you are afraid that you’re crossing the line between being a forward thinking woman and a slut, you should rethink your life path. It’s okay for women to like sex and might even have a tryst once in a while, and this doesn’t mean that they are bad. However, a true slut will fail every aspect of these scenarios. Be honest with yourself and you will get a true gauge of what you are and how you can change.

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A workplace romance can be detrimental to your professional life and career. There is no getting around this. Dating somebody who you work is never a good idea. Most workplace romance takes place with young professionals. Busy work schedules can lead to a lot of time spend with others in your office. Naturally you are going to get close with the girl from sales, but you need to realize what you may be doing to the way that other people in the office see you. Not having the time to meet people outside of the office is a common excuse, but recognizing that this is a recipe for disaster is the first step in avoiding these situations at all costs. Here is a quick guide on how to avoid flirting on the job.

The Signs

The first step in avoiding flirting on the job is to recognize the signs that one is beginning. If you’re getting really close with somebody from work, make sure that you aren’t being overly flirtatious. Being playful with somebody that you work with can be fun and can make the day go by faster, but being overly flirtatious can give them the wrong idea entirely. Take a step back and look for the signs that you are falling into a workplace romance before it even begins.

Make A Commitment

Make a commitment to yourself that you’re not going to enter into a workplace romance. Telling yourself that you’re not going to do something is a good way to avoid it. When you make this commitment, you will be letting yourself down if you break it. This is entirely different than make a commitment to your employer. Most employers frown on romance on the job and this could lead to a very awkward exchange between you, the girl and the HR department.

Think The Worst

The best outcome to a workplace romance could be that you date for a little while, get engaged and then get married. But what about the worst? Have you thought about getting fired? What about if this girl claims sexual harassment? Putting these situations aside, how you would you feel if you were passed up for a promotion because you were dating a girl that would be your subordinate? Always think about the worst thing that could happen to avoid work place romance.

Keep Personal Emails To A Minimum

Emails are a standard for a lot of businesses. Memos, promotional material and other business copy are sent through emails. But what should you do if you get a personal email from a girl that is not exactly “business oriented?” Respond to it with language that cannot be misconstrued. If the emails keep coming, ignore them and have a chat with the girl so she knows that it makes you uncomfortable. Emails have a way a of surfacing even after they are deleted so keep this mind before you that “Send” button.

Business Trips

Business trips can be a lot of fun. Most companies will send their employees to different conferences around the country to get them oriented with the latest technology or techniques in their field. However, business trips can also lead to romance. Sitting at the hotel bar with a coworker sharing stories from college or discussing former relationships can make sparks fly. If you see this coming, avoid the situation by heading back to your room early.

Get Out

One of the best methods to avoiding a workplace romance is to have a non-workplace romance. Being in a relationship will cut all of the funny business out of your real business. Make time to get out and meet people other than those that you work with. Join a gym or just get together with friends and head out one night a week. Making an effort to meet people other than those that you work with will put you in a position to meet a girl that will not affect your professionalism.

We have all heard the horror stories of a workplace romance. Some of the outcomes can even be scary. Dating on the job can easily ruin your credibility within a business and there are countless people who have changed jobs specifically because of this. If you love your job then you shouldn’t be willing to sacrifice it on a fling. Be careful during business trips and recognize the signs before a workplace romance begins. Following these simple guidelines will allow you to avoid flirting on the job and keep you in good standing with your employer.

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Meeting guys can seem like a pretty daunting task. If you have done the bar and club scene then you know what it’s like to have a sweaty guy try to rub his stuff all over you at 1 am. Even in a martini stupor this isn’t flattering. Meeting quality guys that will treat you right and respect a long-term relationship doesn’t have to be an elusive mirage. The fact of the matter is that there are worthwhile guys all around you. You just have to know where to look. Dating takes initiative. If you’re serious about find a relationship with the right kind of guy, here are a few suggestions to get your started.

At Church

Before you go into some kind of rant about religion, just hear me out. Men that go to church has morals that supersede the bar and club scene. They aren’t going to want some dirty tryst in the back of their car after last call. If you’re at all religious, think about how you can meet some quality guys at your church. You don’t have to be the biggest devout Christian, but if you were raised in the church this is a good place for meeting guys. Even if you don’t meet any guys, this could be a great place for making more friends.

At The Gym

Yes, the gym is a pretty popular choice. There are a ton of guys who like to stay in shape. If you also like to stay in shape then this could be a common interest that you might want to consider with your next potential relationship. Almost every town has local gym. In my experience, the local YMCA will have more young professionals because of the classes and services they offer for a cheaper price. The facilities are pretty vast also so you might want to take advantage of this.

In Electronics Stores

A ton of guys are wild about their gadgets. If you don’t believe me then head over to the Apple Store or you local Best Buy. Hang around the computer aisles and wait for a guy to come over. Ask him a question about a computer or a hard drive and let him teach you something about it. This is a great way of meeting men. You can base whether or not he’s a complete geek on how he dresses, but most guys know about electronics.

At The Dog Park

This is one of the best dating tips, especially if you have a dog, although you can still go if you don’t. Head over to your local dog park. The dog park gives you a great way to let your dog run free while you can chat up some fellow dog owners. A lot of singles have dogs. It gives them company since they are single. This is probably the reason that you have a dog. See a guy that you like? Ask him about what breed his dog is to get the ball rolling.

Take A Class

One of the best places to take a class at is The Home Depot or Lowes. Both of these places will have guys trying to learn about home repair. Even if you don’t meet a guy in one of these classes you can gain a little knowledge on how your home works. After the class is over you can scour the aisles for good-looking guys who are looking at tools. Strike up a conversation about painting a room and see where it goes.

Through Single Friends

Although this is a little obvious, your single friends know you best and they will be able to recommend some great guys. If you’re not using your single friends to meet guys, you should start immediately. Being set up on a blind date can be pretty nerve racking so if you do go with a single friend’s recommendation, make sure that you meet him first.

At Local Organizations

A great place for meeting single guys is through a local organization. Taking up a sport or a book club is a good place to meet single guys because you have something to talk about instantly. If you aren’t feeling it after a little while, you can reengage in the club or the sport.

Meeting men doesn’t have to be a full time job. In all of these occasions you can have a lot of fun while you try to meet some guys. In order to meet somebody that you really like you might have to come out of your comfort zone a little bit. The best dating tips are to take a chance and join a club or take a class. Just get out there! Meeting people is not very difficult when you have an open mind and connect on a deeper level than what he’s drinking.

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So, we’ve all been there. You meet a woman that is really cool and you’ve been out with her a couple of times. Since you have taken her out for dinner over the last couple of dates, you want to move things into a more personal setting. You invite her over to your house for dinner and to hang out. Inviting a woman over to your house for dinner is one of the best ways to escalate the relationship to a physical and more personal level. This works the best because she gets to see your personal style and gains access to “your world.”

You cook the dinner and everything is going great. But then the nervousness comes in. How do you get her from the living room to your bedroom? This is where a lot of guys fumble. Getting her from your living room to your bedroom is not a very hard task, but many guys fail because they have not prepared for the situation. Here is a very simple guide on how to get her from the living room to the bedroom.

Getting Prepared

Preparing your home for an impending visit is imperative to success. Make sure that your bathroom has been cleaned prior to the girl coming over. If the girl walks into your bathroom and it’s messy or undesirables are left inside the you know where, you can be sure that she’s not going to see you in the most positive light. Vacuum, dust, and mop your floors. When it comes to your bedroom, make sure that your bed is made and that you have condoms in the nightstand. This is the only place in the house that you should keep them (more on that in a second). Dirty laundry should be in a clothes hamper in a closet and the blinds should be down. The last thing you want to do is be messing with blinds when you should be starting the seduction game.

NOTE: If at all possible, move the best TV in the house to your bedroom.

The Preview

Even though the girl has been out with you a few times, she could be just as nervous going to your house as you are having her over. When a woman comes to your home, they are in one way submitting trust. Even though this is fairly minimal, it’s still apparent. When she comes into your house, offer her a tour. This is essential to creating comfort. Women and men both feel uncomfortable with the unknown. When you give her a tour, she knows where everything is in the house and has a cognitive view of the entire structure. Think about this. Have you ever felt nervous when going to a new bar or club? That’s how she feels. This simple measure puts her at ease and starts the seduction process.

Entertainment

When you are finished with dinner, you can’t just start initiating foreplay. Come up with a way to display physicality between the two of you. A movie works best because you can put your arm around her or cuddle on the couch. Watching TV is not recommended because changing channels, awkward commercial breaks or indecisiveness on what to watch can interrupt the impending moment. You want a streamlined activity such as a movie to put the activity on autopilot. If you have a roommate, you can easily get her from the living room to the bedroom by saying something like “We should watch this in my room so we don’t bother my roommate.

Another way to get her from your living room to your bedroom is to say something like “The TV in my bedroom is better than the one down here” or “this couch isn’t very comfortable for watching a movie. We should go upstairs.” Since you have moved the best TV into your bedroom, this will work. Because she has already been in your room, she will be more compliant.

When To Throw In the Towel

Women are not stupid. If there is interest and trust, they will not have a problem with going into your bedroom. If she is repeatedly refusing to go into your bedroom, there is a problem. Half of seduction is knowing how to not push here too far. When she is uncomfortable she will have her guard up. When she is comfortable, she will comply with what you’re asking with little defiance. This is the easiest way to get her from your living room to your bedroom. When implemented properly, you will see a huge spike in your results.

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Give Him A Massage

After a long day at work your guy probably just want to hang out and watch some TV with you. If you want to get the romance started, give him a massage. A massage is physical and we all know how men respond to physicality. Buy some cheap massage oil from a drug store or a department store like Kmart. This will only cost you a few bucks and it can go a long way in showing your guy how much you care about him.

Lay In Bed All Day

Despite their manly exterior, a guy loves staying in bed all day with his significant other. Get a couple of movies and lay around together on a Sunday. Sundays work best because it will help you recharge your batteries for the upcoming week. When the movie is finished, lay in bed and just have a conversation about the future. Talking about your goals and what you want as a future together can be a very romantic.

Take A Bath Together

Turn out all of the lights and fire up some candles. Draw a nice hot bath and let the water brush over both of your bodies. Turn on some music and rub his shoulders as you sit together. The light of the candles and the music will give you a most romantic ambiance.

Do Something You’ve Never Done Together

Have you always wanted to go to that weird art gallery down the street from your house? Have you always wanted hike a trail together? Being together as you try new things can give you memories that will last. Decide on something that the two of you have always talked about doing and actually do it.

Cook Something Together

Cooking can be very sensual and romantic. When you cook together, you use teamwork. If neither of you can cook, you can share a laugh at the final product. When the meal has been made, you can sit together eating the fruits of your labor. After you finish eating, both of you should clean up. Remember, we’re talking about teamwork so both of you should have a part in it.

Take A Short Road Trip Together

Being out on the road can be very romantic. Choose a place that is close to your house so you aren’t spending very much money on gas or a hotel room. A day trip can bring you close together and the drive will give you time to talk. A very cheap road trip could be to a field outside your city to look at the stars. Bring a blanket and lay it down in the field. Turn on your car radio for some music and lay together under the night’s sky.

Leave Secret Notes For Him

Before you leave for the day, leave a little note for your guy telling him how much you love him. When he finds this, he will feel good for the rest of the day. To take it a step further, leave a note for him in a place that he will find it later on in the day. The inside pocket of a suit jacket works very well.

Romance doesn’t have to die out after the first 6 months of your relationship. You can easily keep it going by being proactive. Relationships are work and there is no doubting this. However, you don’t have to spend a ton of money to show your guy how much you care about him. You can do it on the cheap and get the same, if not better results in the process. Super cheap romance is a way to show your guy that you value him personally and not monetarily. Implement these suggestions into your relationship and you should get the romance flowing once again.

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Making a relationship “work” is tough enough, actually making it a happy and blissful relationship to be in is a whole different story! It takes effort on both partners to make the other feel loved, wanted, appreciated and enjoyed. There will, no doubt, be conflicts along the way, but if you consciously try to make an effort to be more romantic and more loving, your partnership will benefit a great deal. Remember, a lot of the time, it’s the little things that count the most!

If your relationship could use a dose of romance, check out our best tips of the year & keep the fire alive in your relationship!

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Don’t forget to take a look at some of our all time favorite romance articles. Whether you’re trying to find a creative and romantic way to tell your partner that you care about them, or you want to steer clear of behavior that will wreak havoc on your long term relationship, these tips will really come in handy if you want a blissful union.

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• Top Things Women Do To Screw Up A Long Term Relationship
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• 3 Ways To Plan A Romantic Evening
• 4 Romantic Things To Do For Your Boyfriend
• How To Tell Her You Love Her – 5 Romantic Ideas

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Getting Over The Nervousness

Nervousness over the introduction is one of the biggest deterrents when it comes to dating. Many men feel that walking up to a girl and talking to her can be a detrimental action. “What if she doesn’t talk back to me?” “What if she thinks I’m an idiot?” These are things that run through our heads when we even think about walking up to a pretty girl in a grocery store, bar or night club. Getting over approach anxiety can be a serious confidence booster for a man. Achieving confidence of the introduction can even extend into the business world as well as making new friends. But how do you get over it? To say the least, this is easier said than done.

Have A Routine

Routines are one of the best ways to get over dating approach anxiety. Routines take the pressure out of introducing yourself to a woman. The best way to construct your routines is to make a few different ones for typical dating scenarios. For instance, come up with a routine for the grocery store, the bar, nightclubs, parties or other social occasions. Practice your routines in a mirror and think about the different answers that the girl would give to each routine. Make sure that you have a few things to say back for each answer that they could give. Being prepared for your introduction is a basic essential for getting over your fear.

Start Small

Starting small will build you up so you can eventually sustain an introduction. This can be implemented pretty easily. The next time that you go to the bank or to a restaurant, talk to the teller or the hostess. You don’t have to get into their life story, just ask them a few questions that you might not have otherwise. For instance, when you go into the bank, ask the teller how their day has been. Ask them if they have been busy. They will of course answer you back because they want to seem friendly, but it’s good nonetheless. When you walk into a restaurant, ask the hostess when the busiest time is for the restaurant or something similar. This small talk is a stepping-stone to an introduction and then, possibly dating.

The Venue

A great way to do you first approach is to go somewhere that you never go. For instance, instead of going up to girls at your favorite bar, go to a bar that is on the other side of town. Many men think that if they fail on the introduction, they will not be able to go back to the venue at which it occurred due to embarrassment. This will not occur if you go somewhere that you might not ever go back to. Going up to women at a place that you frequent is not recommended, as you might be uncomfortable seeing them again, especially if you’re dating someone else at the time.

The Actual Introduction

The first meeting can be nerve racking if you aren’t prepared. Remember your routines and how you made the small talk before. You want to use the same tonality during your introduction as you did at the bank or restaurant. Be friendly, but not overbearing. Always go up to the girl with a smile. Do not offer your hand, as this is not a sign of romanticism, but of a friend. Deliver the first line of your routine with confidence. It helps to envision yourself as a character in a movie. This puts you into a mind frame of control when playing the dating game. Movies are always controlled storytelling and there will be a part of you that fully believes the girl cannot resist.

The Conversation

Listen to what they say during the conversation. Don’t be scared if the girl does not respond to your routine the way that you may have thought. This is fine. Just be yourself and if you start to get nervous, excuse yourself from the conversation. One of the best non-threatening ways to get out of a conversation that is going south is to say something like “Well, I’ll let you get back to your shopping.” This shows that you are willing to let her go and shows confidence.

Getting Her Number

If the conversation is going well feel free to ask for her phone number. This might happen or it might not. If you are really nervous, act like there is somewhere that you have to be. This kind of gives her an ultimatum. Simply say “I didn’t realize it’s so late, but can I get your number? I’d love to talk with you again.” If she refuses, it’s not the end of the world. You’re somewhere that you will never go again and nobody has seen you. If she does give you her number, you’re off to a great start.

Dating nervousness can be a killer of men. When we are afraid of going up to women, we miss out on potential opportunities to date somebody really special. Following these guidelines can give you a low pressure way of introducing yourself to women with little hassle.

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Imagine an environment where you’re surrounded by sexy, smiling, practically naked women with long legs and stunning curves. The alcohol is flowing, the music is pumping, and every one of these hotties wants to approach YOU.

Welcome to the strip club. Most guys who set foot inside are content to be typical customers, forking over their cash for cock-teasing lap dances and pointless conversations with hustlers who view them as nothing more than ATM machines with a pulse.

(With most customers, strippers know exactly which buttons to push to make the cash come out—and when one “machine” runs out of funds, there’s always another one nearby she can hit up!)

The idea of taking home the sexiest topless dancer from your local strip club for free is one of the classic male fantasies. Or perhaps you desire a H.S.G. (“Hot Stripper Girlfriend”), a trophy babe guaranteed to make your friends drool with envy. But for the average guy, this will never be more than a fantasy.

Could You REALLY Have Sex With A Stripper?

However, I’m here to tell you that it can be done. Until you’ve slept with a stripper, they might seem like goddesses: untouchable and unaffordable. But the reality is, not only can strippers be yours for the taking—in some ways, they’re actually easier to pick up and bang than the average girl you’d meet at a bar or nightclub.

Consider the logistics. For starters, you don’t need to approach strippers and open the conversation in some clever way. Their job is to approach and open you. And while most chicks you meet in bars and nightclubs have their “bitch shields” on high alert, strippers are trying their very best to attract and seduce you.

So right now you might be thinking, “Yeah, sure, but that’s only because strippers want to get inside my wallet!”

Yes, she’s in the club to make money, and if she’s hot, she’s making it hand over fist from chumps who agree to play HER game, by HER rules. (“I dance for you and pretend like you don’t disgust me, and you keep feeding me $20 bills.”)

She’s not working in this topless joint because she enjoys dressing like a street-corner hooker, tottering around on five-inch heels, and grinding on the crotches of fat men with bad breath. To her, it’s not a turn-on, it’s not glamorous, and it’s generally a hassle that she puts up with because the money can be great (for a chick with no college degree or job skills), and she can choose her own work schedule.

I can’t blame ‘em: if I was a young babe with a rock-hard body and no career prospects, and guys were willing to pay me hundreds of dollars a night just to sit there and bullshit with them, and occasionally dance a little and flash my tits, my only question would be “where do I apply?”

How To Make Her Want YOU

However, if you engage these women the right way, and employ the correct tactics, you can bypass the stripper-customer routine and connect with these girls on another level—one that actually gets her sexually interested.

Remember,strippers have sex lives, too. They’re going home and fucking somebody! The bottom line is, they’re women—and women need good sex.

A moment ago, I mentioned that you’ve got to skip over the whole “stripper-customer” relationship. The key word to remember here is “customer.” If you behave like one, strippers will treat you like one. And that means no matter how much cash you spend, and no matter how many lap-dances you receive, if they see you as a customer they’re not going to sleep with you. (Unless she’s a hooker on the side.)

But that’s not what we’re talking about here, since any chump willing to pay for a hooker can get it on by paying the price. What we’re talking about is seducing and scoring with these girls without having to spend money (beyond maybe paying for few drinks) – and controlling your interactions with strippers by being the fun, confident, masculine guy they feel massively attracted to.

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We found a lot of great suggestions on how to flirt with and seduce women and what to say when you’re face to face with a potential mate. But one thing that became clear over and over was how important confidence and self worth were when dating! Even the best “tricks” don’t match up to how powerful a great smile and confidence are.

Take a look at some of our best advice of the year!

• 5 Tips To Get Girls Who Are A “10!” (Video)
• How To Get Girls To Chase YOU (Video)
• Top 10 First Date Ideas – Where To Go & What To Do (Video)
• How To Know If A Girl Likes You (Video)
• How To Get A First Date
• Top 5 Places To Meet A Great Guy
• How To Seduce A Woman (Video)
• How To Flirt With Women (Video)
• How To Use Eye Contact To Approach Women
• How To Talk A Woman Into Bed (Video)

Don’t forget to take a look at some of our all time favorite dating articles!

• 7 “Innocent” Words That Turn Women On
• How To Make Pick Up Lines Work For You (Video)
• 3 “Cool” Ways To Stare At A Woman You Like
• 5 Awkward Ways To Flirt With A Woman
• Top 5 Dating Mistakes Women Make With Men

Very few dating resources have what it takes to make a guy really, really good at the dating game. Even fewer resources can take a total dud and turn him into a Casanova! Here’s the best dating resources we found this year, including some great date ideas that we’ve never heard anywhere else!

• Pandora’s Box – Hands down THE best resource for dating!
• 300 Creative Dates – Inexpensive date ideas that are truly unique.

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5. Q&A: Dating Tips – How Do I Make Her Like Me Even Though I’m White

Online dating has become a forefront of meeting people over the last couple of years. Anybody who has dabbled in online dating has felt the effects of emailing somebody who seemed cool, but never hear back from her. If you are the kind of guy who sends message after message but is not getting any results, you might have to concede to the fact that your online dating profile isn’t very good. Online dating is basically marketing.

Do you think that a company would ever market their product starting with the worst features? Of course not. So when you market yourself with your worst features, you can pretty much see the reason you aren’t getting any results. If you have a profile that has any of these characteristics, you can be pretty sure that it’s not good.

The Primary Picture

When you log into your dating site, look at your primary picture. Is it not the best photo of you? Is it just you and nobody else? If so, your online dating profile already blows. When a woman sees your picture in the listings, they will automatically determine whether or not they are physically attracted to you. One of the best ways to get them interested is to crop your photo. A lot of online dating websites allow you to crop your picture for the primary photo. Get a picture of you and a bunch of your friends and crop yourself for the primary picture. This way, when she clicks on the picture, she not only sees a great picture of you, she sees you out with friends having fun.

Bad Grammar

Did you know that there are people who actually pay to have their online dating profiles setup for them? Some of us aren’t great spellers or great writers. If you are not capitalizing “I” or using texting terms in your online dating profile, it’s not good. Use proper grammar throughout the profile to show that you have half a brain. Would you want to date somebody that can’t string a sentence together correctly? I hope not. That is what women think when they see your run-on sentences or terrible comma splices. Have a friend proofread whatever your profile says before you post it.

The Life Story Profile

Yes, women want to get to know you, but think of this as a cover letter. Would you write nine pages to a potential employer or would you send them a brief cover letter explaining that you would make a good employee for their available position? When you write your entire life story on a dating profile you give away all of the mysteriousness that should unfold over time after you meet the girl. This can easily come off as desperation, which is something that women can’t stand. Let them know that you’re a great catch, but leave the manifesto to your literary agent.

Not Enough Information

Have you ever opened an instruction manual and realized that it was pretty much useless? This is how women are going to feel if you only put in the required words to complete the profile. “I like being outdoors,” is a really bad sentence to have in your online dating profile. Elaborate without going too far. Make sure that are conveying the kind person that you actually are. Do not lie about things that you have done just to fill up space. Write something meaningful that is genuine and you will see more positive results.

Overly Sexual

Everybody loves sex. This is pretty much a given. But time after time, we see online dating profiles that are too sexually driven. Having an undertone of being a sexual being is acceptable, but there are websites for finding a “friends with benefits” situation. If you sex-up your descriptions, you could instantly turn women off. They remember this too so it might be a good idea to start from scratch. Change your username and primary photo if you are guilty of this. Most online dating sites will allow you to change your username with a paid subscription. If you are using a free site, close your account and open a new one.

Dirty Laundry

Your ex stomped all over your and you hate her. That’s fine, but there’s no room for that on your dating site. If you even mention your ex or previous relationships, your online dating profile blows. Talking about an ex and expressing your feelings about the breakup is something that should be left until at least the 5th date. Remove any and all mentioning of your ex. Women and men both want to feel like they are working with a clean palette even though we know that the person has been with others in the past.

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Why Strip Clubs Are So Irresistible

During my years living in Las Vegas, I came to appreciate strip clubs as one of the best environments on the planet to pick up hot, fun and extremely sexual women. As you know if you’ve ever partied in Las Vegas, there are countless bars and nightclubs where you can go to run game on “regular” girls. But I found that the logistics at strip clubs make them hard to resist:

1. Strip clubs are packed with sexy, scantily-clad women who love to party.
2. Every element of the atmosphere, from the lighting to the music, is designed to create an erotic, sensual mood.
3. It is the JOB of all these beautiful women to approach YOU!

Now, I realize of course that they’re approaching you because they want you to buy lap dances—at first. But by using a few clever techniques, you can get them to drop their “sales routine” and interact with you on a real level.

Pushing A Stripper’s Emotional Buttons

At that point, it’s simply a matter of knowing which emotional buttons to push, to get them to feel genuinely interested in you, and attracted. (The “stripper brain” is wired in a particular way, and there are tactics you can use that will work on virtually any girl who works the pole for a living.)

But before I arm you with the techniques necessary to pull off a successful Strip Club Seduction, I want to share with you the #1 Deadly Mistake that men make when they’re in strip clubs. This blunder utterly destroys their chances of ever hooking up with a stripper outside of the club.

By the way, I should also mention that if you’re content going to strip clubs just to hang out with your buddies, drink beer, and buy lap dances—knowing full well that you’re being hustled and will never sleep with any of the girls—go right ahead. You’re donating to a worthy cause: strippers have mouths to feed, bills to pay, and druggie musician boyfriends to support.

But on the other hand, if you’d prefer to step out of the “customer zone” and actually charm and seduce a hot stripper into your bed—and enjoy a rock star sex life, without having to spend any money—then I’ll show you the tactics you need to make it happen.

Trust me, once you use these methods to meet up with a stunning stripper outside of the club and bring her back to your place, you’re never going to want to return to the strip club as a “chump customer” again. You will see strip clubs in a new light. Instead of being a place where you spend your money only to be cock-teased, you’ll see the strip club as a target-rich environment where you can meet and charm beautiful and exotic babes.

Don’t Make THIS Mistake In A Strip Club!

So now, let me reveal that BIG MISTAKE that I referred to earlier, so that you never commit it in a strip club again.

The number one mistake that dudes make in strip clubs is behaving like a customer. The way the strippers see it, there are only two types of men in her work environment:

1. Customers
2. Everyone Else.

Your mission—should you choose to accept it—is to completely avoid category #1, and always be firmly planted in category #2. Every stripper I’ve ever hung out with (and I know hundreds) has a firm rule that she will not date/have sex with/party with customers. But they’re up for having fun with other guys.

It’s also important for you to understand the reason WHY strippers have this rule about not dating/sleeping with customers. It’s not because it goes against their morals. And it’s not because of the club rules (even though the management would definitely frown upon them it).

Why Strippers “Don’t” Date Customers

The reason is mainly financial. Strippers earn their living from customers. And the best customers are the “regulars” who come back to the club time and again, to sit with their favorite girl and buy stripteases.

Now, if the stripper was to accept this guy’s invitation to go on a date, and she wound up hooking up with him, do you think he’d ever come back to the club and spend more money on those silly lap dances? No way. He’d have no reason to blow any more cash at the club, and the stripper would lose a revenue stream.

The other reason strippers have their “I don’t bang customers” rule is because they associate the word “customer” with needy, desperate, or just plain creepy men. You can’t imagine some of the weirdos and sleazeballs these girls have to put up with at the club.

To cope with their job, they keep their minds focused on the money. They adopt a phony persona that they show to the customers. (This is why all strippers use “stage names.”) They don’t want to view customers as human beings; they see them as ATM machines from which they will withdraw as much money as possible.

And this is why the “golden rule” of strip clubs is this: STRIPPERS DO NOT HAVE SEX WITH CUSTOMERS. If you behave like one, you’re never going to lay a stripper. End of story.

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In online dating, the first move is unlike any “in real life” first meeting you’ve ever had.

The Hunt

The first move in online dating is entirely premeditated. There’s no striking up a natural conversation at the water cooler, or meeting at a bar. You came to the site looking for a date, and anyone that responds to your messages or profile is looking for the same thing. Sure, you may both be looking for different types of romance, but at least the core is the same.

This can make online dating feel like a bit of a hunt. Both parties are looking for certain traits that they will use to filter out potential candidates. These might be age, looks or location. Some people focus on the “attitude” or “tone” of the profile, or the level of commitment they think the profile conveys. Because of these filters, when the first move is made, it carries a certain feeling of excitement, especially for the person being contacted. Out of all these choices, you chose them. You looked at tons of profile pictures and while you could have gone with the flirty girl or the shirtless guy, you chose them, despite being unable to crop out that random guy’s arm from their profile picture.

When you finally do find someone you’d like to “meet”, you can make the process seem like less of a hunt by actually tailoring your message to him or her. Your first message should say more than “I saw your profile and you look interesting. We should talk.” They’ve received spam emails with more personality than that. Try to refer to at least one unique thing in their profile or picture. Try something like “That’s an awesome view in your profile picture. Where was it taken?” or “I had a friend who went to that college! They raved about this restaurant downtown.”

The Catch

Striking a conversation with someone online can be scary. When the Internet was in its infancy, many people held misinformed ideas of what it was. The cliche was finding that perfect profile of a 6 foot 4 inch tall, blond, muscular, polo-playing firefighter who happens to be the heir to an empire but risks his life because he’s so courageous, only to learn that he’s a 5 foot 2 inch tall unemployed couch surfer who took 30 seconds to find a good profile picture. Or falling in love with emails from a leggy super-model who shared your passion for old movies and football, only to learn that she’s also that same 5 foot 2 inch couch surfer.

Now, the risks remain, but there’s a certain level of honesty expected from all involved. Make sure that your first move is a genuine one, even if it’s not necessarily full disclosure. They don’t need to know about your unpaid parking tickets yet. Or that you love trash TV late at night. But you should still be honest. When you make the first move, avoid the temptation to send an inaccurate photo or to fake a passion for college lacrosse. As soon as you meet, they’ll know how accurate the photo was, and if the relationship becomes serious, you don’t want to risk old “fibs” coming back to bite you.

The Bait

Every online dating site or social networking site has their own twist on the non-verbal, and non-committal, first move. Depending on what site you are on, you can poke, wink, cruise, smile, nod, give a flower or do any number of other ice-breaking actions.

Before you click that button, ask yourself if this is really the way you want your initial meeting to happen. It’s literally the modern day equivalent of walking into a bar, winking at someone and walking away.

To some people, it’s off-putting. They think you only like them enough to click a button, but not enough to say “hello, I saw your profile and noticed that we both like traveling.” They can’t tell whether you’re actually interested, or just quickly hitting as many people as you can.

Consider making your first move a little more meaningful by actually sending a message, particularly one that includes a reference to something in the person’s profile. If you share a common interest, use that as an icebreaker, not a “wink.”

The Release

The initial contact can be the end of the road for many online relationships. Accept it. There’s no obligation that either party has to go on at least one date with every person that talks to them online, or even that they have to respond to your first message. Or your second, third or fourth. It’s possible that you’ve contacted an inactive profile, or your target just found the love of his or her life minutes before you sent your message.

If you’re absolutely convinced that the person was a match, then a follow-up message may be appropriate. They may legitimately have forgotten to respond to you, or unable to get to a computer. Be ready to call a time of death on this potential relationship if you still don’t receive a response though.

Making the first move in online dating can be nerve-wracking and unusual, but every relationship has to begin somewhere. If you can avoid certain behaviors and you are willing to start a conversation, you can find easily handle the world of online dating.

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Because people move at different speeds within the world of internet dating, it’s important to be careful about when you move the dating from online to offline. While you may connect with one person who is interested in meeting almost right away, the next person may prefer to take things slower and get to know you first.

No Pressure – Move At Your Own Pace

The truth is, moving from online to offline dating is not an exact science. The right time to venture offline and meet the other person is when you both are ready. This may take as little as one day for some internet couples and as much as a few months for others.

It’s important not to try to pressure your other, cyber, half into meeting you or not meeting you. The end goal is that both of you are comfortable with whatever decisions are made and that you are sure that whatever happens is right for you. If you put pressure on the other person to do what you want, you will be beginning the relationship in a flawed manner – one that could have more serious consequences in the future.

Make Good Use Of Online Tools

It may be a good idea to transition into video chat meetings before meeting in the real world. With video chat, you can get a good idea of what the other person looks like, if they’ve been putting up fake or altered photos, and if you connect with their appearance as much as you have with their personality. Video chat can get both of you accustomed to a more intimate form of meeting than simply chatting with another faceless entity. This can bring you both one step closer toward being ready to actually meet for the first time.

Honesty Is Always Crucial!

Whether or not you want to meet someone right away, it’s important to be honest and transparent in all your dealings with them. If you aren’t interested in meeting them, instead of stringing them along for months and months – getting their hopes up before dashing them to pieces – simply tell them how you feel. If you’re not really interested in meeting people, you may want to reconsider whether or not joining an online dating service is really for you.

How Online Dating Usually Progresses

The online dating progression usually begins with first contact on an online dating service. If you like the person’s profile, you then progress to chatting with them to further advance the connection. If this goes well, you may decide to upgrade to phone call status in which you exchange phone numbers and attempt a you-hang-up-no-you-hang-up kind of love. Once the phone calls are running smoothly and both of you are enjoying yourselves, laughing, and having a good time together, the relationship may finally be ready to progress to a first meeting.

If you are comfortable with your date on the phone and have also video chatted with them various times, chances are that your first meeting will go well and only enhance the relationship. Still, chatting with or calling a person is quite different than meeting them in person, and you should always be a little cautious at your first meeting. When moving from online to offline dating for the first time, always let a close friend or family member know where you’ll be going and how long you plan to be there. You may want to also leave them with a photo and some personal information about the person you plan to meet. First time meetings should always take place in a public area.

Examine Your Motives Thoroughly

Don’t pressure yourself into meeting your online date in person out of fear or guilt. If the only reason you are going to meet in person is because you’re afraid you’ll miss out on a golden opportunity, you may want to reconsider your motives. If you haven’t been able to talk to your special online friend for a few weeks and feel that the best way to make up for your guilt is to meet them in person, that might also not be the best reason to take the relationship from online to offline status. It is a natural part of the spectrum of human emotions to feel both fear and guilt, but make sure that you have better reasons than those to take your relationship into the real world.

If you do finally decide to take the plunge and move from online to offline dating, make sure that you can live up to the face you have presented them with in your online interactions. Being honest about yourself, your personality and appearance, right from the start is the best way to make your first meeting flow smoothly. Whatever you have said about yourself over the days, weeks, or months of your online relationship will all be either proven or disproven in the first few minutes of your first meeting, so speak wisely.

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Be Flexible

When scheduling a date, try your best to plan for problems to crop up. If you are going to a concert that begins at 8:00pm, don’t plan on arriving at 7:55pm. Try to put in a 30-minute cushion in case your date is late, you have car problems, you run into traffic or something else happens. Being late can cause a lot of stress on a date. Arriving early gives you time to relax and have a good conversation while you wait.

If you are planning an outdoor date, try to have an indoor backup plan in case of inclement weather. Don’t let a date get ruined because you can’t have your picnic at the beach. Have your picnic in your living room instead. Or go bowling.

Realize that unavoidable things happen. You might lose your tickets or the restaurant might have lost your reservation. Don’t let these situations get you steamed. Show your date that you have class, composure and a sense of humor. Laugh it off.

Use Your Senses

If you want to have a really successful date, try to include as many of the five senses as possible. Here are just a few examples.

• Taste – good food, eating wild berries, nice wine or champagne
• Smell – candles, fragrant flowers, food grilling, mints
• Touch – sand in your toes, waterfalls, a gentle back massage, a warm fire
• Sight – sunsets, beautiful gardens, tour of a historic building
• Sound – a live band, birds chirping, waves crashing, waterfalls

Make It Personal

The ideas in this book are just a guide. If you know your date’s favorite colors, music, movies, restaurants, hobbies, etc. you can make the dates even more meaningful. Perhaps you should do the “Favorite Date” as one of your first so you have this information on hand.

But just because someone has a favorite restaurant, don’t get stuck in a rut by going there all the time. New experiences will add pizzazz to your relationship.

Surprise!

Almost everyone loves a good surprise. Build up the anticipation for a date by keeping certain elements a surprise. Maybe you can send clues for the date throughout the week. If it is a rather “simple” date, don’t play it up too big, otherwise your date might be disappointed.

I think surprises always add to the mystery and romance of a date. It tells me that my date has taken the time to plan something in advance.

What NOT To Do On a First Date

On your first date (and future dates) you want to make a good impression. Here are some things you want to be careful NOT to do:

• Forget your wallet
• Talk about all your previous relationships
• Brag – few things are more offensive than someone who is so full of them self
• Chew tobacco or reek of cigarette smoke
• Get drunk
• Talk about sex or make physical advances
• Be late
• Do dinner and a movie (how ordinary)

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Never, Ever Make Comparisons

It’s best to never make comparisons during dirty talk. Though you may think your partner would be turned on to hear “You are the best lover I’ve ever had”, or “You give a blowjob like no one I have ever known before!” The only part they might take from that little seemingly harmless statement is to start wondering “Wow, I wonder just how many partners he or she HAS had” or “I wonder how many people HAVE tried that move on him (or her.)”

This can cause the mate hearing these words to have very real feelings of uneasiness and then have them obsessing over every thing from “WHO” the other partner(s) were, “WHAT” you did with them sexually, what you didn’t do with them and just how you really stacked up in their mind against what they view as “the competition.”

No one likes to be compared to someone else when it comes to very intimate sex acts with a spouse. It is regardless of whether it was a long time ago or about a former lover from a now dissolved marriage. You don’t want what should be “fun” dirty talk to turn into something which could ultimately be used to fuel jealousy or cause feelings of inadequacies in the person you are with.

You Don’t Have To Use Dirty Talk All The Time

Once you begin using dirty talk on a regular basis, realize that it doesn’t need to happen every time you have a sexual experience. There are encounters where looks, touches and emotions allow the silence to be perfect. As a matter of fact, If you feel it’s one of those “moments” simply smile, press your fingertips to your lover’s lips and say a sweet “Shhhh… baby I just want to hear us breathing in each other tonight.”

Jumping In, Feet First

The hardest part about dirty talk may be the first step to getting started. Take the initiative and the leading role. Just remember to start out your attempt as a fun filled adventure. Don’t take yourself too seriously. Be lighthearted when you bring up your desire to add dirty talk to your relationship and simply look for a willing spirit from your partner.

You may be wondering to yourself, just how do I broach the topic? Try telling your partner, “Have I told you just how much you turn me on?” Chances are they won’t be expecting you to tell them that out of the blue. You didn’t say anything over the top, but it will require your mate to answer back. Once they have responded, tell them that you think you’d really like to try a little playful dialogue in the bedroom during foreplay so that you have another outlet for letting them know just what it is about them that really does it for you. And, as easy as that, the door to dirty talk has just been opened.

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Can You Really Date A STRIPPER?

Imagine how boring it can be for a stripper, having to sit with lame-ass customers night after night and listen to them blather on about their miserable jobs and marriages, or brag about how rich and awesome they are. The fact is, most of the guys who frequent strip clubs have terrible social skills. So when you show up and inject fun into their evening, making them feel attracted to you is not going to be a big stretch.

It’s Their Job, Right?

Now in the strip club, obviously the dynamics are a lot different because it is the woman’s job to seduce the men. As long as a stripper thinks you’re willing to spend money, she isn’t going to ignore you or blow you off. That would be bad business. No matter how unattractive or boring the guy is, if he’s offering to spend money on lap dances, she’ll be willing to hang out with him and entertain him.

However, a stripper —just like any other woman—are going to quickly form an opinion of you. 99% of the time, she knows right away that the guy she’s with is a customer; she’ll try to make money from him, and will never even consider sleeping with him. If he’s not spending, she’s gone.

Get Her Out Of “Business Mode”

You want to be in the other 1%. This means you’re going to break her out of “business mode” and make her view you as a fun, interesting, attractive guy who she can picture herself hanging out with her outside of her work. When you ask her questions about herself, you’ll be a guy she wants to impress—because you have status and value.

(The fact that you aren’t buying a striptease or a lap dance can be a sign of your status—when you frame it the right way. Otherwise, you just look like you’re being cheap. I’ll explain how to do this later.)

The important thing to remember is that you must have a game plan and then execute this game plan, step by step, to the best of your ability. If you encounter resistance from the girl when you try to move to the next step, it means you haven’t “warmed her up” properly and you need to do more of what you were doing in order to move things forward. Wash, rinse, repeat.

How To Seduce A Stripper, Step By Step

Build comfort with them. In strip clubs, guys normally aren’t concerned with making the girls feel comfortable hanging out with them. They reek of horniness and desperation and can’t keep their hands off the girls. Or, they’re intimidated—they simply follow the stripper’s lead, go along with her suggestions, and keep reaching into their wallet to fork over more cash. The stripper would never feel comfortable dating these guys away from her work.

You, on the other hand, are going to use techniques to make her feel comfortable with you. You’ll do things such as:

• Demonstrate that you’re not a “customer” by responding to her approach the right way. (When she asks “do you want a dance,” you deflect it with the correct tactic)
• Show that you understand her profession & her “hustle”— and you respect it
• Identify her “hidden talent” or the ambition she wants to pursue
• Compliment her on qualities that most guys wouldn’t bother to notice about her. (Her sense of humor, cool personality, business smarts, etc)
• Display some chivalry—small, courteous gestures that make show her that she’s in the presence of as “masculine protector”

Next, you’ll tease her and make her qualify herself. In this stage, you “flip the script” and start challenging her (in a playful way). You ask her questions and make statements that make her want to show you that she’s cool enough, smart enough, fun enough, sexy enough, etc. to be a part of your world. You’re going to frame yourself as a guy who knows a lot of beautiful women and is familiar with the whole “stripper game.” The question is, what’s so special about this girl you’re sitting with that qualifies her to be with you?

Taking It Even Further

Then, escalate and sexualize the interaction. It’s not enough for you to be the “funny guy,” the “smart guy,” or even the “cool guy.” And just being her friend isn’t going to get her in the sack with you, either. In order to move the seduction forward, you’ve got to introduce some sexual banter into the conversation and physically touch her (in a way that seems natural, not creepy). Get her into a sexual mind-frame where she is imagining what sex with you would be like.

Then, you “close” her. This can involve a few different steps with a stripper. Usually, the first part of the “close” is getting her phone number. The next step is meeting her outside of the club—either later tonight (which is the ideal scenario), or within the next few days. And the final step is getting her back to your place and having sex.

This last step doesn’t necessarily need to take place in your bed. With strippers, you never know where a “sexual eruption” might occur. Back alleys, parking lots, nightclub bathrooms, elevators, abandoned buildings – the possibilities are endless when you master the art of seducing the stripper!

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Dirty talk can increase the intensity and actual frequency of your sexual experience. It will improve your lovemaking as you communicate your desires with each other more often. And it will increase the amount of lovemaking as it becomes more exciting. When it comes to sex, don’t settle for “common” – trusting each other and a lifetime of learning together makes for a great relationship. Spend time really getting to know your partner, while searching out what “does it” for each of you.

You hear far too often of sexless marriages and relationships where neither feels the romance. Dirty talk is a way to put the spark back into your relationship. If fun, it’s different – and it’s so seductive to be different! To this day, there are still things which my mate finds out about me, that keep me interesting and has her wondering what else might be going on in that brain of mine.

Gaining Confidence For Dirty Talk

A very important note to our female readers:

Many women are naturally insecure about their bodies. The media has not helped. The images thrown at us on a daily basis make a large percentage of women feel that if they don’t have the body of a Victoria’s Secret super model then their man couldn’t possibly be that attracted to them.

Work with what you have. Remember, the old saying “Every man wants a whore in the bedroom and a lady on the street.” It’s true! A Whore you say? Well, maybe just his whore.

Don’t forget, your body is HIS playground!!!! Don’t let feelings of insecurity (“Could I be skinnier? Do I need bigger/smaller breasts? Is my butt too big or too flat?) steal from you the kind of hot and passionate sex that you and your husband both deserve and desire from one another. You are THERE with him – and undressed. He’s completely sold at that point.

The Truth About The Way He Looks At You

He doesn’t care if your lingerie is perfect.

He doesn’t care if you panties and bra match.

He doesn’t care if you missed a day shaving your legs.

Cellulite and stretch marks don’t turn him off.

Jiggling in all the right places – including your hot breasts, butt and thighs – can be a big turn on for him when you are in the throws of him taking you. Women are much, much tougher on themselves and on picking out the flaws on other women than what men are towards judging their bodies.

How To Flaunt What Your Momma Gave You

Don’t undress quickly. Let him take in the unwrapping of the perfect gift you are giving him – your body. Slowly peeling away layers of your clothing and teasing him with little shots of the goods he is about to enjoy is very erotic. Don’t cover yourself with the sheets of blanket or he might as well be having sex with a down comforter. If you get up to go to the restroom – don’t grab a robe!

Walk slowly, stretch, look back over your shoulder and smile, he’s enjoying the view – the view of YOU!

Men are visual creatures and drink in the site of your body nude. Don’t be afraid to walk around the room naked. Confidence is the most beautiful trait any woman can possess. And ladies, after you have brought your man to the heights of pleasure and he has emptied his semen, you don’t have to be “done,” just because he has gone off the edge of the cliff. Take the time and relish in what he has just done.

Turning It Into Dirty Talk

Describe to him the look of it, the feel of it, the amount of it, and should you be so inclined, the taste of it. If he shoots his load on his chest, on your chest, or on to your stomach – play with it – trace your initials or name in it, doodle hearts on his body. Everyone say it out loud  - semen is not BIOHAZARDDOUS!!!!!

If instead he empties himself inside you , once he has pulled out , don’t immediately grab for something to clean up with. Too many times women will make men feel like their semen is toxic. When in fact, it is what you cause him to do just by arousing him. YOU make him EXPLODE!

What a powerful thought that is! Tell your man how warm it makes you feel inside to have this extension and the complete final result of his intense desire for you, to now be a part of your body!

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If you have a spouse who travels, phone sex can be just the trick to keeping the passion hot while they are living out of a hotel. Make an appointment to meet via phone before you go to bed so that you can use dirty talk and mutually masturbate. If you have to, write down some ideas ahead of time to get things started.

Don’t Be Afraid To Let The Fantasies Take Over

This is ‘fantasy time’ for both of you, since you obviously can’t be there to touch each other, so it’s perfectly okay to touch yourself. Set up the scenario and then just describe over the phone how you would want it to play out. Tell each other in great detail what you’re doing to your body and ask them to do the same.

Take your time. Good stories are worth the extra effort. Ladies, describe to him what you’re wearing and don’t be naked at the start of the call. He will want to hear you unbuttoning, unzipping and undressing. His imagination will paint the perfect picture if you tell him step by step what’s happening as you do it.

What To Say

Tell him you want to hear him undressing and to tell you every detail. Ladies, as you’re telling him you want to wrap your lips around his cock, ask him to stroke it and if he can look down and see you taking him in.

Men, when you tell her that you want to ease just the head of your penis into her wet and waiting vagina, ask her to take her fingers and pretend that it’s you. If you want to set aside a time for later that evening, start sending some emails or texts early in the day.

Here are a few examples of what you could say to get his attention:

“I get so wet when you call me – please call me!”

“When I get back home, I’m going to give you the most amazing blowjob of your life!”

“I’ve been sitting at this desk for hours, and the thought of you, here, bending me over – it is driving me crazy!!!”

“I can be 6 states away, but when I hear your voice on the phone my nipples get hard and I get wet, and warm you know where!”

“I can’t believe that here I am in San Diego in the middle of intense negotiations with these clients and all I can think about is having you under this conference room table, on all fours, lifting up my skirt.”

Did you know that when I’m in my hotel room and can’t get you off my mind, I masturbate? It’s true! Your name spills from my lips over and over again as I orgasm.

Use The Tools At Your Disposal

Home phones, office phones, hotel phones, cell phones are all game when it comes to a surprise call and some hot phone sex. Also, don’t be afraid of “inconvenient times” or being somewhere. Excuse yourself to the bathroom and make a game of how quiet and fast you can be! Be creative and open, and you will have lots of fun!

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Using Your Voice

Dirty talk has to sound sexy. If you say “that feels great” in a very monotone, unexcited voice, then that is not very sexy. Put emotion into your dirty talk. Whispering and breathy comments can be quite sexy. Grunt, moan and make noises – varying the tone and the pitch occasionally so that it does not get monotonous. Scream or shout when you are really into it. Also, you aren’t giving commands like a Colonel or Major to his enlisted men.

The goal here is for both of you to be conveying to each other the passion and intensity of your encounter. It CAN and SHOULD be fun, not work. Imagine the basic tone of a football game. Everyone in the stadium has high expectations but as the game begins, as a sports fan, it starts out slow. We aren’t up off the couch screaming at the players at the top of our lungs from the coin toss.

Start dirty talk slowly – whispers and playful dialogue as you are kissing, and as you are face to face while first getting things warmed up. As the passion heats up you can change the tone and level of your voice to mimic the pace of what is happening in the room. If you’re further apart, or if he’s behind you, you’re going to need to be louder so that mid-stroke someone’s not saying “I’m sorry, honey what did you say??” That’s a sure fire way to break the momentum you have been building.

Another good example is a piece of symphony music. The first notes of the musical composition are not the loudest portions of the piece. The tempo starts out slower, building to the climatic heights in the middle, and then descending at the end.

Imagine your lovemaking as the same. A beautifully written musical form that should keep a pace that reflects the given situation. A lovemaking session where you have a whole night to play and explore would have a different tempo from one where you’re squeezing in a quickie between dinner and taking the kids to soccer practice.

Setting The Mood

Playing some music during dirty talk helps provide background noise that may make it easier so that you won’t feel so self conscious over the sound of your own voice. Some music also has great lyrics that will inspire you to pull them from the song and use them while using dirty talk with your partner. Have you ever known anyone to NOT be turned on while listening to Marvin Gaye, Barry White or Luther Vandross?

Songs like “Let’s Get It On,” “Sexual Healing,” “Got To Give It Up,” “If Only For One Night” and others are romantic, slow, sensual and have very erotic lyrics while providing great inspiration and setting the tone for a romantic night together.

Candles

Candles placed around the bedroom, living room, bathroom or any other room in your house only elevate the feeling of a close, private, safe haven for the two of you to explore each other.

Bubble Bath

Bubble baths are a great way to relax and spend a little more time with foreplay before hitting the sheets. Sitting in the tub together is a great way to start and work up some additional desire. By the time you have washed each others backs and played around in the bubbles, you maybe find yourself never even making it to the bed.

Aromatherapy

Perfumes and bed linen sprays are another way to set the mood for dirty talk in your bedroom. Spritz the pillow cases or the ceiling fan ahead of time so that the room takes on a special scent before it’s time to play. Once you’ve worn a special fragrance during an encounter and your lover smells it on you again, it will take you back to the moments you spent wrapped around each other in the heat of passion.

Wine, Or Your Drink Of Choice

Bring a bottle of wine to bed and poor some slowly into her belly button. Sip it out and then do the same to your partner. Ladies, when he’s going down on you, take a little wine and pour it into a shot glass. Pour it slowly from the top of your mound and it will drip down the inner creases of your thighs – ask him to lick it up. This is an excellent way to put a new twist on oral sex!

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Be The Kind Of Guy Who Never Gets In The Friend Zone In The First Place

The best “dating tips” you could ever get about staying out of the friend zone is to never be the kind of guy who gets put in it in the first place. These guys are wimpy and weak, where guys who don’t get put on the “friends only” list are strong and confident – the alpha male type. The trick is to not be afraid to make women feel beautiful and sexy, and to not be afraid of showing a girl that you like her – like really like her. Don’t pretend that you don’t have a sexual or romantic connection to a girl – instead, just tell her! Be honest and confident about your feelings. Don’t apologize for who you are, and don’t act like her best girlfriend.

Show Interest In Her

If you like a girl, the best way not to get on her “friends only” list is to show that you’re interested in her from the get go. Don’t be too scared to admit that you have a sexual attraction to this girl – and be okay with that. If you think that it’s wrong somehow, or you’re not supposed to like her “that way,” you’re paving your own road to the friend zone! It’s normal and perfectly okay to be sexually attracted to a woman and for her to know that! In fact, it’s perfectly normal and okay that she be sexually attracted to you too – but she won’t be if you’re hiding the fact that you even want to be more than friends.

Make A Move

Don’t just wait and sit on the sidelines like a “best friend” when you could be out there with the girl you want to be with. Take that first step and make that move! Whether it’s to let her know that you exist (that’s a great first step), to start flirting with her or even a bolder move like leaning in for the first kiss, you need to go ahead and do it. Stop thinking about doing it, planning to do it or making excuses as to why now isn’t the right time. Just put yourself out there, take the risk and make a first move!

The Importance Of Building Sexual Tension

When a girl starts to think of you as more than just a buddy is when she begins to feel that undeniable sexual tension between the two of you. To get girls, you have to become a master at creating, shaping and using sexual tension. While some guys don’t find this difficult at all, other more “left brained” guys (you know, scientists, engineers, accountants, etc.) have a more difficult time accessing their more creative side to build sexual tension.

You can get more in touch with the right side of your brain, take up poetry or an art class – anything that engages your right brain. Do something creative that allows you to think differently than you normally do.

How To Build Sexual Tension And Get Her To Think Of You As More Than Just A “Buddy”

1. Start slowly – you don’t want to rush in too quickly and blindside her. Compliment her, tell her that she looks beautiful or stunning – don’t say “hot,” or “sexy” because this will turn her OFF immediately.
2. Get in her space. Touch her and when you do, let the touch linger just a little too long. Don’t be creepy about it, but you don’t want to end it until just after it becomes slightly awkward. Flirt with her.
3. Move at her pace, but take it just a little farther. This allows you to push her limits a little bit, but not way past where her limits usually are. You’re just going slightly outside of her comfort zone.

Show A Side Of Yourself That She Hasn’t Seen Before

If you’re already in the friend zone, these dating tips can be particularly useful if you want to get yourself out of it.

Show the girl you like a side of yourself that she’s never seen before. You’re an interesting guy, with passions and hobbies too, right? Don’t always be talking about her and what she likes or wants to do. Show her your motivation, drive and passion. Let her know that you’re a guy she could be with and have fun with!

Also, you want to make her laugh and feel happy. This is a huge deal, because women remember the way you make them feel more than they remember your name, what you do for a living or even what you look like (although she’ll probably remember all three if you make her feel absolutely amazing).

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Creating a top-notch page on the dating website that you choose is one of the most important tasks ahead of you. It shows others who you are while providing you with the opportunity to craft a compelling overview that will help attract the right matches. There are many things that you can do to create a great page and you’re about to discover the most important ones.

Honesty Is Critical

Being honest about yourself is how you’re going to attract the right matches. If you’re dishonest you’re simply taking the chance of not receiving the dating results that you set out to attain. Your goal here is to show others your most important attributes and give them a clear picture of what to expect if they want to take the online dating relationship even further.

Demand Excellence From The Photos You Add

Many people fail to take the time to post good photos to their online dating profile. This is critical as it’s a visual representation that others will be seeing when they visit. You want to make sure that the photos that you post are going to compel those who want to learn more about you.

Creativity Is Key

It’s no secret that the creative ones are the ones to stand out from the crowd. By being creative,  you’re ensuring that you stand out to the matches that take the time to visit you. Nobody likes a dull person so make sure that your page doesn’t put you out to be one.

Avoid Any Forms Of Negativity

Being negative will be an instant turn-off to many people. If you are perceived to be a negative person the chances are that you won’t be able to connect with others. Make sure that you maintain a positive appearance and show others that you’re a person that’s not going to be the crash of the night.

Don’t Be A Dead User

Being active and finding matches that attract you is what’s going to contribute to your success in the online dating world. If you’re online daily you’ll notice that you will get a lot more views as dating websites feature the active users, not the inactive users that just add to the number of members in their user base.

You’ll also want to keep your page updated on a regular basis so that the image portrayed is one that reflects who you are now, not who you were before.

Bragging Can Lead To An Online Dating Failure

A lot of people think that if they brag about themselves they’ll attract more people and seem like the perfect person. This isn’t the case unfortunately. People don’t want to date someone that they see is going to do nothing but talk about themselves and how they are so awesome.

The goal here is to show others that you’re an extraordinary person. Have confidence but don’t talk about it – show it! This is simply a case that proves actions do indeed speak louder than words.

Clarify What You’re Looking For

Don’t expect others to automatically know what you’re looking for in a relationship. Clearly explain what would be the best match for you. This includes explaining what kind of personality you like and the kind of activities that you’d like your significant other to be a part of.

Being clear about what you want so you can give those who visit your page a clear picture of whether or not they would be someone that you’re truly interested in.

Don’t Forget That You’re Putting Yourself Out There

One thing that a lot of people fail to realize is that when they join a dating website they’re putting themselves out there for the world to see. This is why it’s important not only to follow the tips that were provided in this article, but also think about what they put on their page.

You want to be portrayed as someone that is worth having a relationship with. Not someone that aimlessly throws stuff up in an effort to quickly attract matches. After all, you can expect more people to be interested in you if you have a page that’s well thought out.

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Be Honest With Your Partner From The Start

You will need to assure them from the get-go that this is something you want to try with them instead of just springing some hardcore phrases on them during the middle of a romp. A good deal of women are turned off by porn, so try not to emulate what you’ve seen during some of those movies. Lots of them have cheesy lines and actors that aren’t up for Academy Awards for a very good reason.

You could find that your better half finds dirty talk uncomfortable and off-putting. Some consider it to be raunchy and a put down to a person they love. Some heart to heart communication and a give and take attitude between two people who love each other should be able to put the uncomfortable one at ease. Be patient with the partner who has reservations and just use soft pillow talk from time to time to warm them to the idea.

Sometimes dirty talk can be more comical than erotic, depending on what is said and how it is said. It’s okay to laugh! But don’t give up – reread some of the suggestions from time to time if you are feeling like you haven’t quite got it yet.

Be Yourself When Using Dirty Talk

Women, please don’t try to be who you are not. Faking an orgasm and screaming like it’s the best sex you’ve ever had will only cause problems down the road. He’ll wonder why he can’t get you that worked up EVERY time when you get tired of pretending and you will eventually tire of faking it and long to really be satisfied. At that point, and rightly so, he’ll be frustrated and unsure of why he suddenly can’t put you into the throws he saw you ‘act’ your way through before.

When you’re using dirty talk, don’t tell your partner about things you honestly have NO intentions of doing (ie. Threesomes, group sex, farm animals, sex in public, midgets, bondage, etc.) You may find that it triggers some new fantasies or embeds some new images in his or her mind that he or she could continue to ask you to talk about and then want to act them out in real life.

Be aware that it can come across as very insincere. Telling your man, “your penis is so huge,” when in reality is only about 3 inches isn’t going to make him suddenly feel like a stud. Telling her that that you love her massive tits when she is more “grape” than “grapefruit” in size could backfire. Sure, indulge a little but don’t go completely overboard with your exaggeration. In fact, when your lover is overly conscious of his or her size, dirty talk can do amazing things to boost their confidence. Tell the guy with the tiny penis that he rubs your clitoris so perfectly or whisper to your wife that you love being able to put her whole breast in your mouth. Dirty talk gives you the avenue to banish their insecurities and make them eager for more hot sex with you.

Mix It Up

Dirty talk can also become redundant (just like missionary sex day after day after day). Make sure that you don’t use the same phrases, over and over, or trust me, it will have the exact opposite effect and your partner might end up thinking, “Okay, I’ve heard that so many times – please shut up already.”

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Make sure you have “scooped” the person, that you have carefully checked out his or her profile. If the “other” has been good in putting it together, there would have been just enough information offered to reveal an interesting, even captivating personality, leaving just enough to hope that the “scooper” would want to look for more.

Flirting is a sport, like fishing. The woman attracts the man with some nice-looking bait or the man attracts the woman with bait that is just as well nice-looking and uniquely attractive.

Be Lighthearted

Go light and establish an edge. Use light email conversation, but angle on something real that was seen in the profile, something that gave a small flash of the person as special. That special something is what could feature the person for you. It would be entertaining and, hopefully, eventually fulfilling. There’s a lot of advice on online dating that’s pegged on being funny and humorous. Surely, being light, easy-going and humorous could move the fish closer to your net. Your net, itself, must be inviting and charming.

Write Short Emails

Some of the online dating sites have shaped the initial response/reply vehicles to be short comments signifying mere interest. If you are a woman, take your time in responding to the initial inquiries. If you are a man, respond to them easily and effectively. Both of you are lighting a campfire. You want to get the coals burning to an enticing, inviting warmth.

Ask her something about her location. Find out if she wants to talk about her job, don’t assume she does, even though it may be revealed on the profile. Look for things that are uniquely interesting on his profile. Either of you can take your time in getting personal, looking for signs that show the individual revealing more of her or himself.

Take Your Time In The Initial Phases

Both of you may have several people you are responding to, initiating conversation. Again, you want to enjoy these first few moments. You want to create light laughter as people are usually obliged to do at parties, at first meetings. As the emails get longer, you decide to narrow your choices and get into chat sessions with this certain individual. You like the interests and responses each of you have shared and want to expand on them.

If she mentioned children and you have children yourself, slowly reveal your kids to each other. This would most likely be on the profile.

Continue to show and build support and consideration. This is the time where you can grow in honesty, revealing more. You are looking for a good relationship, one that can be sustained, one where it feels “just right” to be open to. It’s like you are building comfortable structures for each other. Chatting, you both will serve up what the person inquires about, keeping it light and not going too far.

All the time, keep asking yourself is this the person you would like to be with, is this an individual you can be comfortable with.

Stick To Your Profile

Profiles show movies, books, activities that people like and pursue. You believe in some ways these activities complement yours. Ask questions concerning it in relation to your own interests. Then inquire about interests and things the other has done that you would like to know more about. Compliment her on her experience. If he expresses a liking for his job, ask him about his interesting experiences with it.

You have so far:

1. Taken your time, shown comfort with the person’s profile.
2. Have not been too flashy, but have created smiles and laughter.
3. Enjoyed and appreciated the first few moments.

Good things don’t happen inordinately fast or quick. You are enjoying subtleties that build refreshing communication.

Don’t Dive To Deep In The Beginning

If the chatting proves okay, and there has been good humor, relaxation, it means you both have accepted and acknowledged a pace, a certain rhythm.

Sitting around the chatting campfire, some of the unusual stuff will come out. Check out some of this, but not all. Wait for the actual dates. Depending on age, experiences, there are several hills and valleys in people’s lives. Maturity shows that people can appreciate that others have had hard or difficult times. If the relationship engenders anything, it will present future soft places for these things to come out.

The initial aim is to see if both of you want to make a move for that first date, where it becomes a pleasure to move from the campfire into the dawn of a new friendship.

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Is Online Dating Desperate?

Online dating is a great way to meet people and form romantic relationships, but there are many people who doubt that someone can find love online. Also, there is a common belief that people who register for these sites are desperate, lonely or socially awkward. However, all of these thoughts are common misconceptions about online dating. Do not let these opinions fool you, because it is entirely possible to find love online.

All dating web sites work in essentially the same way: users create profiles that describe their personalities, physical appearances, favorite activities and what they are looking for in a date. Users also upload images of themselves to show other users exactly what they look like, which can also prove that their physical appearance description is accurate. With this information, other singles in their area find the profile and contact them for a date, if they are interested.

How You Can Find The Right Match

Dating web sites also use a variety of methods to match their users up with other singles who have profiles by gauging their compatibility. Typically, a dating web site will have a series of questions and surveys that users will answer to help create a score that can be used for judging how compatible they are with each other. The benefit of using these to find love instead of traditional dating methods is that you already know whether or not you have much in common with someone.

Another reason that online dating can help you find love is because you are not limited by physical constrictions when meeting people on the Internet. Traditionally, people would have to have met in person or be hooked up through mutual friends. You may only discover that your date shares or does not share interests with you after the first couple dates. However, with online dating, you can find a person who shares the same interests as you without discovering that they are different than you expect.

In fact, online dating allows someone to communicate with a match before they meet in person. Through chats and messages, a potential couple can skip the awkward situations of figuring out how similar they are before meeting in person. However, it is worth noting that some online dating sites will not allow users to communicate with each other with a free profile. In this case, you will have to pay for the site’s services. But you can always cancel your membership after you have found love, which will help save money.

Also, if you do not mind traveling long distances to find love, online dating sites go even further than traditional dating for finding matches. For example, let’s say a user in West Virginia finds someone who meets all of their expectations for a significant other on the site, but they live in California. Without online dating, this relationship would have never been formed, due to the fact that both people would not have crossed paths through the means of traditional dating and will be more likely to have a healthy relationship, based on the fact that they are compatible lovers.

Are Predators An Issue?

Another worry many people have about online dating is that the sites allow online predators to prey on potential victims. Fortunately, there are many ways to make sure that you will find love on these sites and not find yourself in a dangerous situation. Most online dating sites take extreme measure to prevent predators from using their web site, as it is obviously bad for their business. By contacting someone online and over the telephone before meeting in person, you can make sure that you are talking to someone who is genuinely interested in finding love.

If you are still worried, there is a very easy way to prevent any trouble from meeting someone for a date from an online dating site. First and foremost, do not meet someone in person until you are certain that you have made a match and think that you have found love. When you finally decide to meet someone for an in-person or “offline” date, make sure to pick a public place and do not meet them at their home or invite them into your home. Popular examples include restaurants, coffee shops and museums. Avoiding private places like your homes for a few dates will also help make sure that whoever you are talking to is actually who they say they are and not an online predator.

But do not let the unfortunate scenario of meeting a predator make you avoid trying online dating. There are many more stories about people finding love through these sites than the unfortunate stories described above. In fact, as the Internet becomes more and more of a cultural mainstay, you will find that more couples are meeting through technological means.

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How To Get Used To It

You can practice just like you would for a speech and even do it in front of the mirror. Try doing it out loud while you masturbate. You can practice with sexting, writing short notes or via email (but be very careful when sending to a work email address!)

Allow yourself some fantasy time and as your mind wanders as to what it is you’d like to be doing, jot it down. Once you give yourself room for self expression and the permission to write down these sexual thoughts that are floating around inside your head, you will find out just what kind of phrases turn you on. Choose a few at a time to spring on your spouse the next time you’re in bed together. Some people find it much easier to put the words down and use letters as a way of beginning their exploration into dirty talk. The more you use stimulating conversation the easier it gets and it will become like second nature.

It Takes Two To Tango

Dirty talk works best when it is used as a dialogue. No one wants to be doing all of the talking in any conversation. Encourage your partner after they’ve joined in by telling them the next day how hot you thought it was when they said something that sticks out in your mind. If you do this, they won’t be left wondering if anything they uttered was embarrassing or whether you found any of it odd or inappropriate. A little encouragement can go a long, long way.

If your partner is a novice or not very vocal, here are some ways to help get them in the game:

• Watch an adult movie together that has dirty talk in it – either in the bedroom or out. This can help set the pace.
• Read a book passage that has some very erotic text – these are very easy to find in most bookstores and are chocked full of plenty of sex scenes. Take turns reading them to each other or hi-lite passages that turn you on when you’re alone so that you can read them during playtime in bed.
• Pick up a book on erotic poetry. Read portions to each other while rubbing on your partner. Ask them which ones they found the most stimulating while you were reading to them.
• Write sexy emails back and forth and try to get the dialogue going. (Again, you probably do not need to use work email addresses for this).

Questions To Ask In The Bedroom

• Do you want me to do it fast or slow tonight?
• Do you like the feel of my wet ___?
• Are you ready to shoot your load in me?
• Where do you want me to ejaculate?

Let your partner start out with “yes” or “no” responses back to these open ended questions. Then encourage them by saying, “please, tell me more,” as they get more comfortable about talking back to you.

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The Best Ways To Meet Women

Meeting women doesn’t have to be as difficult or as intimidating as it sounds, although all the dating tips in the world aren’t going to make you feel like finding a girl is any less daunting. But it doesn’t have to be! There are actually lots of ways to get introduced to girls, and many of them may be through things you’re already doing! For example, some of the best places to meet girls are through activities and things you’re already involved in. If you have an interest or a hobby, try to find a group or club that you can get into where you can get to know people who share your same interests and passions.

Another great way to find girls is during the day – most girls are on guard at night, when they’re out clubbing or in bars. They’re expecting to get hit on, probably by a bunch of weirdos, so they’re automatically on guard against anything like that. During the day in relaxed situations like riding the bus or train or going to the supermarket is actually a great way to run into a girl while hear guard is down and start up a flirty conversation. You can make a much better first impression this way! Going to tourist spots or travelling, or enrolling in dance classes (those are loaded with girls) are also excellent ways to expose yourself to more people in general – and more girls.

Take Advantage Of The Weekend

Find things that are happening on the weekend, like festivals or get togethers. Bars, clubs, and even beaches can be great places to go on the weekend because they’re literally packed with people! Don’t just sit around at home on your couch on a Saturday – actually get out there and go somewhere that there are lots of people. You’re bound to meet someone there! Even the mall can be a great place to go – anywhere there are ladies around, that’s where you want to be! It may be nerve wracking at first, especially if you’re not a very social person, but as you continue to put yourself out there, it’s going to become easier and easier and you’re going to become more confident when doing it.

Don’t Be Afraid Of Speed Dating Or A Singles Event

If you live in a larger metropolitan area, chances are, there are lots of speed dating or singles events out there that you can attend. Most guys are a little shy when it comes to doing this type of thing, but there’s really no reason for it. Consider it no harm, no foul. If you meet someone that you really hit it off with, great! If not, you’re not going home any different than when you arrived. It’s also a great way to practice talking to women (which will come into play when you meet a girl you actually have a connection with), so you’re not really leaving empty handed at all. The more exposure you have to being around girls and talking to them, the more comfortable you’re going to be when you actually want to ask a girl out.

Enlist Your Friends

A lot of relationships start by two people meeting through friends. This is actually one of the best dating tips out there, but it’s often overlooked because a lot of guys think that it’s so simple, it can’t possibly work. Well, it can! If you get introduced to a woman through a friend (and you’re a good friend to this person), you’re actually going to come very highly recommended. So while you still want to make sure you’re making an excellent first impression, she’s already going to be thinking good things about you before she meets you. It also helps to be friends with guys who are actually great with the ladies! While it may turn you off a little to consider making friends with someone who is so smooth he gets all the girls, but think of it as a learning opportunity. Watch what he does and how girls respond to it. That is actually a great way to change up your game and start doing things that work!

Also, make friends with girls, even if they’re not necessarily the type you want to date. This is one of the dating tips that is often put on the back burner also, because many guys feel as though if they’re not going to be meeting the girl they could potentially date and have a romantic connection with, why bother? But remember, girls have female friends. And sometimes they’re hot!

Have Confidence And Get Comfortable In Social Situations

One of the best dating tips – if not THE best – is to improve your confidence by getting yourself out there and into social situations. It may feel awkward at first, but it is most definitely going to pay off when you finally meet the girl you want to ask out. If you’re just not ready to get out there yet, consider getting a dating coach. It could be your best friend, or another guy who happens to be really great with the ladies. You can even consider hiring a professional dating coach if you want the best advice. A dating coach can see what you’re doing and come up with a customized plan to help you get more girls in the shortest amount of time possible. Some professional dating coaches can be expensive, but it is well worth it to help you hone your skills so that eventually, YOU can be the suave guy that picks up all the ladies!

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During The Day On Public Transportation

One of the best places to meet women is during the day on public transportation, such as the bus, the train or the subway. This works better if you’re in a large metropolitan area where public transportation is a part of daily life. Most guys who take the bus or subway to work and back sit reading a newspaper, or listening to music, without ever paying attention to what or who is around them. This is a big mistake! Next time you’re using public transportation, take your earbuds out and pay attention! Look for hot girls or ladies that you’d like to meet and get to know. You’ll be surprised – there are many of them!

Also, a woman is less on guard during the day (because she’s not in “dating” mode), so you’re likely to make a much stronger impression on her if you approach her when she’s not expecting it. When you approach a girl in a bar or a club setting at night, she is already on guard and is going to be a lot more selective of who she talks to and hangs out with. She’s more likely to turn you down or ignore you when she’s on guard in a situation like that. During the day, on the bus or train, it’s quieter than in a bar and you’ll be able to actually have a decent conversation and get to know a girl. It’s also more relaxed and friendly, so it requires less effort on your part to be smooth.

Getting Introduced Through Friends

Getting introduced to a girl through friends is a great way to meet someone you can actually have a relationship with. However, you have to be careful with this and make sure your circle of friends are people you actually connect with and who understand you and who you are as a person. This ensures that their friends are actually going to be someone you connect with too. If you currently have a small circle of friends, begin by working to expand that circle and become friends with more people before you start getting introductions to girls. If not, you’re going to build a reputation for being the guy that bounces around and dates everyone’s friends – and before long, no one will want to introduce you to their friends.

At A House Party

A house party is an excellent place to meet girls – the “house party” was pretty much designed specifically for that purpose. If you plan it right, the environment is intimate enough to make a girl feel comfortable but also exciting enough that there’s an edge there that allows you to create sexual tension (which is a must have when you’re flirting and getting to know a girl!) Have one of your friends plan a house party, or host one at your own house! Dating is all about getting out there, making more friends, meeting more people and being more social in general. Dating is a social activity – so if you’re not social, you’re certainly not going to be dating anyone anytime soon. Doing that is going to not only get you more girls, it’s going to get you the kind of girls you want to be with.

Hosting your own house party has it’s benefits, if you have a large enough house. If not, consider renting a party hall or another similar type of location that you can have the party in. Regardless of where you do it, if you’re the host, everyone wants to meet you! So really, if you’re the host of a party (especially if it’s a great party!), girls are going to be coming up to you and wanting to meet you!

Remember that dating is all about being confident and having fun. You’re not just making friends to get more girls, because the process of making and having friends is actually a great thing too, girls or no girls!

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Improving Your Lifestyle

One of the best dating tips is to work on improving your lifestyle before you actively try to meet and date women. The reason for this is if you have a poor lifestyle, you’re not going to attract any women! Start by looking at all the different areas of your life and finding ways to improve them. This in and of itself will attract women!

Have a lifestyle that puts you into contact with people on a daily basis, especially girls. If you never go out or you’re not very social, find some fun places to go or things to do that puts you into contact with new people all the time. Go places, make friends and have fun!

You also want to make sure that your lifestyle is attractive to women – and we’re talking the overall package here.

Build Your Social Circle

Work on making friends and building your social circle. If you’re meeting new people, make an effort to become friends with them. Become happier and more social overall. Develop a passion for meeting and talking to people, and don’t be afraid to show attraction for a woman. Be confident enough to flirt with a girl and create a little bit of sexual tension. This is one of the dating tips that can directly improve your love life! If you’re not at all confident and don’t approach any women or flirt with them in any way, you can hardly expect to get a date.

How To Get Confidence

There’s never going to be a magical moment where you suddenly feel confident and completely comfortable with approaching women. You’re just going to have to get out there and do it! However, after you do it (and continue to do it over and over), each time you’re going to be a little more confident and a little more smooth when you walk up to that next girl.

Things You Don’t Want To Do

• Being too one-dimensionally focused on just picking up girls. You want to keep them too!
• Not caring about making friends or improving yourself
• Being demotivated. Nobody wants to be around a downer.
• Not taking action – you’ve got to get up, get out there and start making this stuff happen! It’s not going to magically happen for you if you’re just sitting around hoping a girl will approach you.
• Not taking risks. You’re not going to get anywhere if you’re not brave enough to take a risk now and then.

Know On The Inside That YOU Are Worth It!

One of the best dating tips of them all (if not THE best) is to know inside that you have a lot to offer. Confidence is everything when it comes to dating and if you don’t believe in yourself and that you have a lot to offer a girl, no one else will either. You’ve got to believe it inside you first, before anyone else will.

Know that you deserve to be with the right girl, and you deserve to have a great relationship. You also deserve to date around and have fun if you like – have enough confidence in yourself to know that the right girl is out there and you will meet her. If you truly believe it inside, that will be all the motivation you need to go out and make this stuff happen for you!

Enjoy The Journey

Sometimes it’s not all about the end result and that goes for dating as well. Life is a journey and you need to enjoy it – every step of the way. Don’t just become a better person so you can get a date, become a better person for yourself. Enjoy the process.

Remember to relax and have fun. Nothing is going to happen right away, or in an instant. But as you improve yourself, you improve what you have to offer a girl. As you do that, more and more women are going to be interested in you! It’s a gradual process, but if you’re enjoying each step of getting there, before you know it, you’re going to be having a great time dating girls or in a blissful, happy long term relationship.

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Is Sex With Someone You Work With A Good Idea?

Again, this is something you need to think about before you get into it, whether you’re looking at casual sex or a steady relationship. Although this kind of sex can be super hot, it’s also best to examine the situation beforehand and think with your head – not your penis.

What kind of rules does your workplace have about relationships between the employees? Is it simply something the company frowns upon or are there serious repercussions if you ever got found out? If the latter is the case, sex with someone you are employed with really may not be the best option for you. Some other things you want to think about are whether the person is married or not (that will really complicate things) and if you could withstand losing your job if you got busted. Really think it through first!

Keeping It On The Downlow

If you do decide to go ahead and have sex with someone you work with (in or out of an actual relationship), you’ve got to make sure that the sex stays on the downlow. Here’s how to make sure your secret stays a secret:

• Don’t let the sex affect your attitude at work. Don’t walk into work looking like you just got laid, while your fellow employee does just the same. Pretty soon, people will put the puzzle pieces together. Just go to work like you normally do and act the way you normally do.
• Be incredibly discreet. Put their phone number in your phone under another name.
• Don’t allow the work relationship you have with this person to change at all – people can sense this. Treat them the way you normally would at work (as though nothing were going on between the two of you personally) and make sure the romance and sex is limited to only after you punch the clock. Work hours are not the time for flirting or sexual innuendo!
• Never refer to sex at the workplace, and never talk about what you’re going to do later, where you’re going to meet up, etc. Make sure those conversations stay under wraps.

Is There Anything Really Wrong With Sex With Someone You Work With?

All disclaimers aside, no. If two people are legally of age to have sex and consensually do so, there’s really nothing wrong with it at all. So if you do decide to take the plunge and date a co-worker, have fun with it! Don’t be sorry or feel guilty about it if you and your partner have both agreed to make things stay professional at work.

Relationships that have started between employees are not at all uncommon – in fact, it makes total sense that since you’re at work all day almost every day, that you’ll meet someone you find interesting and want to get to know better (or have sex with). If you really like this person or feel a strong sexual attraction to them, there’s no reason to be completely closed off to the idea – because with the right attitude, you can have a lot of fun and you may just meet someone you fall in love with! You just have to make sure you go about it in an adult way and cover all your bases first.

Some Important Things To Remember

• Absolutely no affection, fondling, flirting or anything else while you are at work. This rule CANNOT be broken if you don’t want to get caught and possibly lose your job.
• If you’re going to date around the office, make sure you don’t date everyone in the office. You don’t want to get a reputation for being that guy.
• Be open to a long term relationship. It may start out as an office fling, but it could easily move into something more. The thing that is unique about office relationships is that you spend so much time with the person at work that you really get to know them. So take your time with it and let it go wherever it goes!

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Confident Women Like Confident Men

Know who you want to be and be that guy. Don’t try to be someone you’re not, and don’t get down on yourself for being who you are. Take pride and have confidence in yourself, because women who are really good looking are confident too. If you believe in the product you’re selling (which is yourself), women are going to want to buy it. You’ve got to believe you have the ability to approach and date ANY woman you want, or it’s just not going to happen. If you truly believe that you have a lot to offer any girl, your confidence will allow you to do just that – and then you’ll have the pick of women in the bar or wherever else you go to meet women!

Any Guy Can Learn To Be Amazing With The Ladies

A common misconception about dating is that if a guy is shy, or is a “nerd” that he can’t be good with women. Quite the opposite is true – ANY guy can learn to be amazing with the ladies. It doesn’t matter whether or not you’re the most attractive guy in the room, because honestly, even some of the best pick up artists aren’t underwear model material (far from it). If you think you’ll never be great with ladies because you’re “average” looking or for any other reason, you’re really only limiting yourself. Shed the negative thinking and have the confidence to know that you CAN learn to be great with women.

Be the cool guy that other people want to hang around. Work on improving yourself and have goals and a game plan. Don’t get caught up in faking it, using the right “pick up lines” or any of those “dating tips” that rarely ever work. It’s all about believing you have something great to offer (because you really do) and knowing that you can have any woman you want!

Stay Away From Anything Weird

Again, you want to stay away from any dating props or cheesy pick up lines. If it’s not authentic, women are going to smell it from a mile away. There are no magic “lines” that will instantly make women attracted to you, nor are is there anything else that will help you ask a girl out. You’ve just got to build that inner confidence and start putting yourself out there!

What you do want to do is be personable – be friendly, funny and be yourself! Don’t try to be a guy that you think women like, because that pretty much never works. Also, don’t be afraid to consider getting a dating coach. People pay personal trainers all the time to help them to work out and lose weight, a dating coach goes along the same lines – you’re having someone help train you to get the women you desire! If you don’t want a professional, enlist one of your friends (that also happens to be good with women) to help you through the process.

Focus On Being A “10″ Yourself

While looks certainly aren’t everything, if you consider yourself to be a “3,” you’re never going to get the hottest woman. So implement a game plan that allows you to work towards becoming the kind of guy that other women see as a “10.”

Have Fun Dating

It’s not always about “getting the number” or meeting the woman you’re going to have a long term relationship with or even marry. Have fun dating and meeting new people – it doesn’t always have to go somewhere. Also, don’t focus so much on meeting women, but also meeting new people in general – make new friends and find people who have similar goals. If you currently have friends that aren’t supporting you or are bringing you down, it may be time to get them out of your life and make friends that help lift you up and help you meet your goals.

Finally, you want to make the decision to become good at dating. Make the command decision to learn what you need to do to become more confident with the ladies and just do it. Put yourself out there and if you have the confidence, chicks who are a “10″ will flock to you!

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Why Fingering Can Be Better

Almost always, that hole happens to be a vagina, and the filler, a penis. Of course, fingers are always at your disposal, and we have already discussed their utility over the genitalia. First of all, you have ten of them – which is always a good thing. Second, they gyrate in ways and venture into alleys your jimmy never can.

The art of fingering is a vital element in your sexual repertoire and no man becomes great in bed without the ability to handle her core with finesse and flair.

Things To Keep In Mind

• Getting fingered is a vivacious experience. But since you’re handling a very personal part of her anatomy, she’ll expect from you a certain level of consideration. So don’t ever get involved with a dry vagina, it’s an unwelcoming one. Stir her libido first and make her wet herself before you administer anything.
• Since the walls of the vagina collapse on each other, it can easily grip your fingers to oblivion, extremely tight ones will test blood circulation to a point where finger movement becomes out of the question. So make sure you have strong and enduring tentacles.
• When administering any maneuver, consider your fingers’ length & size, and her elasticity.

The Right Strokes To Use

In & Out

This is as pedestrian as it gets. Who in this wretched world hasn’t tried the classic in & out thingy? For the creatively challenged, it wholly defines the very art of fingering. It’s as easy as ABC. With elbow grease and some arm action, merely slip a finger or 2 in & out of your partner.

The fun begins when you induce variety. And this is achieved by creating combos for rhythm and speed. Orchestrate cadences that alternate fast and slow motions. Some examples:

• Start slow then rapidly increase speed, then STOP! Then return to slow and rapidly build up again
• Start slow, then rapidly accelerate. Then gradually decrease speed, then giddiyap again
• Have sex music playing and let your fingers groove to it. Or hold a beat in your head and move accordingly.

Finger Plug

When women say they feel empty and want to be filled by a man – they mean just that. They want to feel the warmth of a male inside their vagina.

So do her a favor and fill that void by inserting a finger or two in there. And STAY THERE! Decline temptation to withdraw. Let her luxuriate in your presence, allowing her vaginal muscles to squeeze your fingers as tightly as she can. Add eye contact and you’re gold. And while you’re in there, feel the warmth and wetness of her insides, attend to the contractions she makes.

Circular Moves

For hygienic purposes, her walls collapse on each other, effectively closing out unwanted stuff. Comparing the vagina to a hollow barrel or cylinder won’t be accurate since it merely stretches to the mold of the object inserted up there. But for our noble purposes here, let’s picture the vagina as a barrel.

Finger Roll

With this maneuver, your finger rolls back and forth like a log. Insert a finger or two straight up, then rotate your arm clockwise as far as it can go, after which you rotate it counterclockwise as far as it goes. Vary the speed & depths of your rolls.

Finger Tornado

The Finger Tornado has 2 variations. The first is powered by circular motions of the finger itself, the second, which is the heavier version, utilizes circular movements of the whole arm. But ultimately, both are drawing circles or spirals inside her vagina. (This could be a challenge for extra tight ones.)

Start at the surface opening and run circles with your forefinger. As you penetrate, imagine you’re barreling a tunnel by spiraling into her. Slide one millimeter at a time and hold a sensual rhythm to it. Continue rotating ‘til you reach the farthest possible point for your puny fingers. Stay in the area for a while, after which you slowly withdraw – still continuing with the circular actions.

Vary the pressure to the walls and do both clockwise and counterclockwise moves. Imagine what it must be like for her.

Finger Tornadoes are designed in such a way that you engage every millimeter of her vaginal barrel – as far as your fingers can go. If she has unusually sensitive spots inside, you’re bound to find them. Instead of the textbook ramming, which is really the forte of penises, worm your way into her. Tunnel your way through and you might strike orgasm gold.

Finger Rake

The Finger Rake works like the garden tool of a similar name. It’s similar with the previous technique, but you excite her insides by pressing and sliding the fingers SIMULTANEOUSLY – scratching with 2-4 fingers. It’s like clawing the insides of the vagina, without intending to effect blood or pain.

This goes without saying, but clean, trimmed nails are an absolute must!

How To Stimulate The G-Spot

Do you have any idea what you can do to your lady’s sanity when your penis is angled correctly at her G-spot? But instead of trying different sexual positions to correctly aim your equipment, try the Penis Emulator – it’s a powerhouse. With this technique, you will use your fingers like a penis to POKE! POKE! POKE! directly at her G-spot.

Instead of doing sets of “come here” gestures – poke into it directly and firmly. Watch her go crazy with this.

Poking, however, is often not enough. You have to bring your arm into the stroke by moving it up & down, hitting the top wall of her vagina. The technique is a simple UP & DOWN movement. The upward stroke bumps the spot, the downward thing is the recoil.

You can go hard and build serious speed on this one, with the added enjoyment of hearing her vagina sound-off as you operate. Your other palm should be pressed firmly on the area below her bellybutton. This is not simply to hold her pelvis down and restrict movement, the bearing down isolates the area and causes more intense sensations. This may even make your partner squirt!

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Question: How do I flirt with a tomboy (who likes me too)? How do I know she’s flirting with me? What do I need to know about tomboys?

–YouTube Viewer

The “Tomboy” Stigma

Just because a girl is more into doing “guy” stuff like playing sports, likes hanging out with guys more than girls and doesn’t do the whole “shopping and frilly dress” thing, it doesn’t mean that she’s any less girl when it comes to the way a guy can make her feel. She is still going to get butterflies in her stomach when you smile at her and she’s still going to be receptive to flirting. However, you do have to make sure your flirting style works with her personality. Cheesy pick up lines and standard seduction techniques may not work for these types of women.

Going Out And Having Fun

If you try to schmooze a tomboy, or try to be a really “suave” guy around her, she may hit you! The most important thing when learning how to flirt with a girl like this is to plan to do things with her that are a lot of fun. Take advantage of the fact that she’s not a girly girl, and plan dates that are super fun and keep you guys laughing and having a great time. Some great date ideas are:

• Going to a ball game
• Hiking
• Hanging out and playing video games (if she’s a tomboy-gamer sort of girl)
• See a movie (make sure it’s NOT a chick flick)
• Instead of a fancy restaurant, have hot dogs in the park (and who cares if you get messy?)

How To Compliment Her

Complimenting a tomboy is where you can really get into trouble if you don’t choose the right things to say. You don’t want to compliment a girl like this on her looks – she works very hard to make sure that she doesn’t dress girly, because she doesn’t want to be noticed for the way she looks. Don’t compliment her makeup (if she wears any) or her outfit – instead, find things about her personality to compliment.

Tell her you love her smile and the way she makes you laugh, or compliment her hobbies. Tell her she’s really good at her favorite sport, even better than you! Compliment her accomplishments and the things she’s done that she’s proud of.

Be Yourself

With dating, it’s always important to be yourself and never try to be the person you think the girl you’re interested in would like. This comes off as fake and almost always backfires – regardless of the type of girl. Of course, a tomboy is going to see right through your charade a lot faster than any other type of girl and you’re probably not going to guess right on the type of guy she would be interested in – so she probably won’t like you at all if you try to be someone other than who you really are.

How Do You Know If A Tomboy Likes You?

Surprisingly enough, this is one of the areas where a tomboy is going to be pretty much just like any other girl. You’re going to be able to tell if she likes you the same way you might notice that another girl would like you. She’s going to be doing pretty much the same things like:

• Making excuses to be around you
• Getting in your space
• Making more eye contact with you
• Laughing and smiling at your jokes and things you say
• A tomboy, however, may mockingly punch you rather than touch your arm or leg softly, but it means the same thing – she likes you!

She’s Not Going To Be Good At The Seduction Game

Unlike more girly girls, a tomboy isn’t going to know how to flirt or be very good at the seduction game. She’s going to be more laid back, casual and relaxed. So make sure you take things slow and don’t move too fast. If you do, you might scare her off! Aim to be more casual and relaxed yourself, and let the attraction unfold naturally. You’ll be able to tell if she likes you if she wants to spend more time with you, so after that, just let things take their natural course! Be yourself and remember to have fun!

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Difficulty Relating To Women

Okay smart men – you know who you are. You’re the science guy, the IT guy, the accounting and finance fella. You’ve got brains and you know that if any women really got to know you, they would fall madly in love with you! Here’s the problem:

Most brilliant men are so left-brained that they have incredible difficulty relating and talking to women! So how do you overcome this?

It’s time to get in touch with the right side of your brain! Some dating tips may give you pick up lines that promise magical things will happen as soon as the words leave your mouth, but that’s just not the case here. You’ve got to get more in touch with the right side of your brain, so you can learn to relate to women better. This is not going to immediately snag you a date with the smartest (and hottest) woman, but it will help you get better at relating to women on a larger scale.

Thinking Outside The Box

To get the right side of your noggin’ more involved, you need to find some creative hobbies that allow you to get into that mode and away from the super smart, super analytical side of your brain. Poetry and art are awesome ways to get that going, but pretty much any hobby or activity that allows you to think “outside the box” will do.

It might be uncomfortable at first, or you may feel out of place, simply because your brain doesn’t work that way. You’re not an artsy-fartsy guy! But if you get just a little outside your comfort zone and start doing things that help you develop an artistic nature or engage your creativity, you’re already on your way to meeting women and being able to relate to them well enough that you can pick them up!

Be Yourself

Being yourself always works better to attract women, simply because the ladies can usually spot a fake a mile away. A lot of guys don’t understand that women want to get to know YOU, not the guy you think they want to get to know. So many men put on a fake front because they think that will help them attract more women and in the beginning, it may. But it won’t be long before she realizes that you’re not who she thought you were and she’s out the door.

Be yourself and take pride in the fact that you’re an intelligent man! Ladies love this! They want to be able to have a real, amazing conversation with a guy! So have the confidence to put yourself out there – the REAL you.

Strong Masculine Energy & Eye Contact

Having a strong, masculine energy and having the confidence to make eye contact makes a big difference when trying to get a date with a smart chick. In fact, this is one of those dating tips that applies to pretty much any woman. Ladies don’t want to be with a wimp – and unfortunately, a lot of really brilliant guys come off as “wimps” simply because they’ve never had the confidence or practice to have a strong masculine energy about them. They may have grown up as “nerds” or were made fun of for being so smart, so they sink into that persona over time – without realizing that it IS possible to be uber-smart and great with the ladies.

Your Mindset Is Important

It’s very important that you have the right mindset when it comes to attracting intelligent women. Don’t think that these smart women are beyond your reach – they are just people too! A lot of times, guys are so intimidated by hot women, they don’t approach them – but in reality, these girls really don’t get many dates because men are too intimidated to approach them! Have the mindset that these women are real people and you can connect with them – just start that conversation! Hot women are often the most friendly, down to earth people you’ve ever met.

Don’t Focus On Looks

Don’t be so focused on a woman’s looks that you fail to see the amazing personality within. Have a conversation with her, ask her intelligent questions and give intelligent answers. Get to know who she really is! It’s critical to be open and real with a woman if you want a shot at having a true relationship.

Basic Tips For Talking To Women

• On average, women say about 15,000 words per day and guys say about 6,000.
• Make a goal to start talking more, period!
• Learn to relax in social situations
• Practice talking to women! Even if it’s not the girl you’re interested in, just get more comfortable talking to women in general.
• Learn something new every time you talk to a girl! Women are people too.
• It’s not a failure if you don’t get with a girl, but you learn something that will help you in the future.

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The First Intimate Contact

Nothing can make or break you as a lover like kissing. It is the first real intimate contact you have with your partner, and the way you kiss can alter her feelings for you completely. If you’re too aggressive, too sloppy, or just too much, you could end up killing whatever attraction she had for you to begin with. However, kiss her just right, and she will be putty in your hands. What makes a kiss spectacular really depends on the couple, but here are some do’s and don’ts that are pretty universal.

Hygiene Is Essential

Don’t fall victim to sewer mouth. You could have lips as luscious as Brad Pitt, but bad breath will ruin the moment. Cigarette smokers especially have to watch the halitosis.

Do take care of your teeth. Brush, floss, and rinse with mouth wash daily. Popping a breath mint right before making out helps, but it won’t get rid of festering gunk already up in there. Nobody wants to make out with a guy who has teeth like a meth addict.

Use Tongue Sparingly

Don’t jam your tongue down her throat. It is the most common kissing error made by men. Once things get heated up, the feel of your tongue will set her ablaze! Ramming your tongue into her mouth before her lips are even parted will bring everything to a screeching halt. What, are you fifteen?

Do tease her with the tip of your tongue. Once you’ve been kissing for a bit, feel free add a little tongue, but think of it more as a lick than a jab. Keep your tongue soft for maximum pleasure.

Don’t Assume You’re Having Sex

Don’t assume a kiss means you’re getting to have sex. For a woman, kissing can just be kissing. Physical contact with you helps to build her feelings of intimacy toward you. If every kiss leads to your putting your hands down her pants, she will begin to feel objectified, and a rift will form. Translation, you’ll never get any.

Do learn to love what she loves about kissing. There are a lot of nerve endings in your lips, allowing for sensations you may be ignoring. Close your eyes, and let the kiss be about the kiss.

Kiss Her When She’s Naked!

Don’t forget to kiss her when she’s naked! Kissing shouldn’t be just a tool to get into her pants. It’s an act of intimacy, and will make her feel relaxed and cared for during penetration. Plus, when you’re in the throes of passion your sense of touch is heightened, and this kiss will be felt through your entire body.

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How To Create Sexual Tension That Feels Natural

Many guys attempt to create sexual attention when they’re not already sexually aroused – this can actually backfire, because it comes across as completely fake. If you want to create that natural feeling, crazy sexual tension, you need to make sure you’re “in the mood,” so to speak, so that you can convey those feelings to the girl you’re with.

Uncertainty and anticipation is the core of what it’s all about, and if you’re not really experiencing those feelings, the girl you are with isn’t going to either. You really want to be feeling true anticipation that something sexual may happen, and you want to feel that real uncertainty that you may or may not get lucky tonight! The girl you’re with is going to pick up on those feelings, and they will intensify her own.

Getting Into A Controlled Sexual State

So you want to be sexually aroused when you go to create sexual tension, but you don’t want to be so aroused that you’re humping her leg or that you orgasm within just a few minutes if you do actually get to have sex. What you want to do is get yourself into a controlled sexual state – where you are feeling aroused but not too aroused. You can do this a number of ways:

• Imagine her naked.
• Think about what you want to do to her.
• Imagine what she’s going to do to you.
• Gaze at her lips while licking yours and imagining kissing her.
• Make soulful eye contact.
• Touch the back of her neck softly.
• Don’t be afraid of awkward silences – use them to your advantage!

This will all help you get psyched up and into that mode of creating sizzling sexual tension – just be careful not to take yourself over the edge and get yourself too psyched out.

The Push/Pull Of Sexual Tension

It’s is kind of like a dance, or a game of tennis. There’s a lot of push/pull there that you can’t fake. You’ve got to be into it and she’s got to be into it – and you both have to go in a little and pull back a little to really create those intense feelings. Really great sexual tension will leave a woman feeling just a little confused, because you’re going to be giving a few mixed signals on purpose.

When you start feeling like she’s really into it, you want to back off just a little bit, to give her room to push. She’s not going to be interested in you at all if you don’t give her that room and make her question whether you really like her or not. That’s when she’s going to test you by getting in your space a little and contributing to the push/pull.

Make Her A Little Uncomfortable

Once you get to the point where one or both of you have just passed the feeling of being a little uncomfortable, you know you’re in a great spot and you don’t want to back off right away. Feeling a little uncomfortable (not the creepy kind, the good kind) is what fuels the fires of sexual tension, so once you’re experiencing that, you want to keep the flirting going for a little while before you back off and let her come to you.

Have Fun And Enjoy It!

If you’e afraid of talking to women, or if you aren’t confident enough in yourself, you’re not going to be able to create really great sexual tension. You’ve got to be confident, but you’ve also got to be relaxed enough to know that it’s a really fun game that you can enjoy – but not something you have to take completely seriously. Relax and have fun experimenting with different moves and seeing what reaction you get out of them!

Practice Getting In Touch With Your Feelings

Sexual tension is a feeling – and while most girls are already in touch with their emotions, a lot of guys aren’t. This may make it difficult for men to spot it. Practice by getting in touch with your emotional side by participating in activities or hobbies that require you to use your emotions. This will help you relate to girls more, so it will be easier for you to sense what move to make next.

Flirting Is Key To Sexual Tension

Flirting is a big part of creating sexual tension, so if you don’t know how to flirt, it’s time that you learn! Practice by getting out there and talking to women. Flirt with them and see what kind of reactions you get! Practice your eye contact, body language and conversation skills so that you can really master your game before you ever meet a girl you really like and want to make sure you do everything right with.

Practicing will also help you learn how to keep from overdoing it, because just like with anything else, it’s easy to overdo the sexual tension. You need to learn how to spot when it’s time for you to move on (if she’s just not feeling it) or when it’s time to move things along and get more intimate. When it feels right, you’ll know when to move on to kissing, touching and foreplay! This comes with time and practice!

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I’m in a dating dry spell. Big time. It’s been forever. I can’t seem to break it, no matter what! It’s beyond frustrating! What can I do?

What She Said:

Be open to meeting new people, having new experiences and be willing to put yourself out there – safely!

If you’ve been in a long-term dry spell, chances are, subconsciously or otherwise, you were abstaining from a relationship to keep yourself safe emotionally. Perhaps you went through a bad breakup that turned you off from dating for a while. The long and the short of it is, you were most likely feeling too vulnerable to date, so don’t be hard on yourself.

You’ve decided you want to end your dry spell, so that’s half the battle. Now that you’re open to dating again, you’ll most likely be putting out a vibe that interested parties are sure to pick up on! Setting an intention and giving yourself a goal is a powerful way to focus on moving forward.

Be creative. Ask friends to hook you up with their single pals. Register with an online dating service. Head to the park, the gym, the library, the bars. See who’s out there. Don’t be shy about striking up conversations. Have fun flirting! You’ve got nothing to lose.

The main thing, as always, is to be happy with yourself and your life. Your joy and confidence will attract similar people – and that’s a great way to start! Remember to have fun, enjoy yourself and trust that you deserve the best.

What He Said:

Well, the obvious answers are lower your standards and/or get a prostitute. Nothing says “slump buster” like hookers and ugly chicks/dudes. Aside from that, lower the stakes. It’s not that big a deal, and it’s not going to last forever. Even a broken clock is right twice a day.

Okay, maybe that’s not the inspirational quote that you’ll see on a Hallmark card, but it’s true. It’s not that big a deal. This too shall pass.

After that, you’ll have to figure out what to do next. If you have what you want, keep doing what you’re doing. If not, you will need to do something different. Try and find your patterns and break them. Or make a list of things you swore you’d never do (ask friends to set you up, online dating, whatever) and do them, no matter how painful or awkward. Doing things different will lead to different results.

Keep an open mind and be curious. Be interested but not invested. If something works, keep doing it. If not, don’t and try something else. Wash, rinse, repeat.

You could also give up and abandon all hope. That seems to work especially for couples who think they can’t have a baby. After they give up and make peace with the fact that it will never happen, it usually winds up happening. Funny how that works. Well, funny unless it’s you. Then, well, not so much. But still people will chuckle. Behind your back.

Being frustrated or angry isn’t good. It’s helpful to a degree in that it will make you get off your ass and inspire change, but after you get to that point, they really aren’t very helpful parts of the process. They’re like booster rockets for the space shuttle. They get you to a point and then they no longer provide fuel, so you have to jettison them.

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If you ask your friend out and they don’t feel the same way as you, you risk ruining the friendship because things will be different after you let them know you have romantic feelings towards them. It’s better to know (for the most part) if you and your friend are actually more than that – so how can you tell if you and your “friend” should start REALLY dating?

She’s Going To Want To Spend Time With You

If the girl you’re interested in has romantic feelings for you too, she’s going to want to spend as much time with you as possible. She’s going to make excuses to see you and be around you.

She’s Going To Be Okay If The Conversation Turns Sexual

If she’s into you, she’s not going to shy away if the conversation turns towards sex. If she’s not and just wants to be your friend, she’s going to shy away from sexual conversation and stick to topics that are completely platonic. So test her out and bring up a topic that is just a little sexual to see how she reacts – does she shy away from the conversation or does she actively participate in it? If she actively participates in a sexual conversation – and even takes it a little further – it’s a safe bet that she digs you.

You Will Feel It

The energy with friends isn’t the same as the energy you feel when you have an actual connection with someone. If you’ve ever felt that feeling before, you know exactly what it is – there’s no mistaking it. Guys who have never had this connection with someone may not be sure how it feels – but rest assured that you really will know when you do feel it. Pay attention and be looking for that – if you’re not experiencing that real connection, you’re most likely really just friends.

Is She Into The Next Step?

To find out if the girl you like is into taking the next step with you, you have to realize it’s not all about what she says. You have to pay attention to her body language, because she may not be saying anything that lets you know she’s into you at all. Her body language will, however, tell you whether she’s digging you or not. If she is, she’s going to make excuses to get in your space, making eye contact with you and laughing and having a good time with you. Here are some easy ways to tell if she’s ready for you to make the next move.

• She starts dropping hints for you to make a move
• When you flirt or are being playful, she reciprocates and shares in the witty banter
• She opens up and seems to want to talk about more personal topics
• She’s happy to see you or talk to you
• She finds excuses to touch you or brush up against you
• When you touch her, she doesn’t back away – she may even lean closer to you

Don’t Wait Too Long!

If you feel that energy and everything seems to be lining up, don’t wait too long to make a move. Just make it! Ask her out! Don’t wonder whether she’s really into you or not, or second guess yourself. So many guys second guess themselves so much that the girl they like – and who likes them back – thinks that he’s not interested in her! If you feel that romantic connection, go for it! If you wait too long to ask a girl out, you may end up missing the moment entirely.

Relax And Have Fun

If you’re so keyed up and worried about figuring out whether a girl likes you back or not, you may miss key signs that she really does like you. You definitely want to be aware of those signs so you can make the next move if you sense she’s into you too. So take a deep breath and relax! Have confidence that you’ll know when things feel right and that she’ll give you plenty of signs to lead you in the right direction. Have fun and wait for that special connection to happen!

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Have A Strong Identity

The importance of having confidence in who you are and having a strong identity can’t be emphasized enough here. Think of yourself as the “product” and you’re “selling” this product to women – do you believe in what you’re selling? Do you like what you’re selling and do you think it’s a great product? If you don’t like what you’re selling, no one else will either!

Learn to get comfortable with who you are and what you have to offer. This will not only help attract women to you, it will also help you to know more about the kind of women that you could possibly have great chemistry with. Focus on being fun, energetic and exciting for others to be around – you want to be the kind of guy that has lots of friends that truly enjoy hanging out and having great conversations.

You also want to find your strengths and accentuate them. You don’t want to be the kind of guy that blends in with everyone else, because then girls aren’t going to notice you at all! You want to find what is unique about yourself and show that off. If you stand out from the crowd a little bit because of something that is special about you, that’s a good thing!

Learn How To Be Comfortable In Social Situations

No girl has a “dream guy” that sits in the corner at a party and doesn’t talk to anyone. Girls want a man who is passionate, has things to talk about and wants to talk about them with other people. So if you’re not comfortable in large groups or in social situations, you want to work on this. Practice makes perfect, so put yourself out there. The more you expose yourself to social situations, the more comfortable you will begin to be in them. As you do this, your self confidence will soar!

Be Someone She Can Be Proud Of

This is perhaps one of the best bits of dating advice out there. While women can and will fall in love with guys who they can’t be proud of, you don’t want this to be you! If you really want a girl to fall for you, you’ve got to be someone she can be proud to introduce to her friends and family. You want to be someone she can bring up in a conversation, rather than the topic she’s trying to avoid in a conversation.

Have an awesome job, volunteer or do things that you’re passionate about. Have short term and long term goals, and don’t be afraid to tell people about what you’re striving for. She will see and admire the things that you love doing that make you who you are – and this is what she will brag about to her friends and family when she is dating you!

Get Comfortable Being Romantic And Sensual

Women love sensuality and romance, period. If you can’t bring this to the table, it’s not likely you’re going to be any girl’s fantasy. Get comfortable with showing women affection, touching them and kissing them. When you kiss a woman, make it something that she remembers! If you don’t know how to be romantic or sensual with a woman, read up on seduction tips and how to really be intimate with a girl.

With physical intimacy comes emotional intimacy, so you don’t want to wall yourself of emotionally. Get comfortable with experiencing your feelings, talking about them and being in touch with your emotions. Don’t be afraid to open up to a girl and let her see that you’re a little emotionally vulnerable. Yes, you’re taking the risk of getting hurt here, but ultimately, this is the piece of dating advice that will get her to fall head over heels for you.

Develop A Posture And Presence That Women Want To Be Around

Girls want to be around that strong, confident guy. They don’t want to be around a weak, wimpy guy that asks permission for everything. Learn to make decisions about date ideas, where to go and what to do. Let a girl know that she doesn’t have to worry about things when she’s with you. Show her that you’re the alpha male – and she’ll be putty in your hands.

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Focus On Becoming More Attractive Every Day

Attractiveness isn’t just about how you look – it’s about how you feel on the inside. How you feel about yourself shows up on the outside, and people read into that. If you’re down on yourself or don’t have self confidence, it’s going to be written all over your face. If you want to be attractive to women, you have to have confidence and strength on the inside.

Becoming more confident in yourself and feeling great about who you are as a person doesn’t come overnight, especially if you’ve never had good self esteem. It will take time, but focus on becoming confident and secure with who you are a little more each day. Turn yourself into someone who isn’t afraid to go after what they want, instead of sitting back on the sidelines and watching life go by. Have passions in your life and things you care about. Have goals and work towards them each day.

Believe That You Don’t Need A Girl To Be Happy

The less you “need” a woman in your life, the less you will give off that needy, clingy vibe. You will automatically begin to attract more women, simply because you have that confidence to go home alone if there’s no one that catches your eye. Know that you can be happy within yourself – it’s a choice you have to make and when you do, it will totally change your life. Really believe that you can be happy by yourself and that you don’t need someone else to be the source of your satisfaction in life.

When you have things in your life that you enjoy doing – that you don’t need a woman for – and that you’re truly passionate about, people are going to want to be a part of that. When you exude confidence and happiness all the time, people are going to want to be around you, especially women. They all want a piece of that! Make an effort to increase your self esteem and know that you are happy with who you are, without a girl. Then, instead of trying to be someone that a woman will like, you can find one that is the right match for YOU.

Don’t Get Stuck On One Woman

A lot of guys get stuck in a crush and think that this is the only girl that will ever make them happy. They obsess over this one girl, and don’t make any room for other women that might be a better match. When you learn to be happy without women, it will be easier to know that the right one will eventually come to you. You’ll have the confidence to know that if a particular woman you like doesn’t feel the same way about you, it’s not the end of the world – you’ll end up with someone who is an even better fit with you.

How Do You Get The Right One To Chase You?

Believe it or not, it’s not difficult to get a woman you like to chase you. It is, however, the opposite of what most men try to do when they meet a girl they like. When most guys meet awoman they like, they go after her hard, flirting up a storm and making it completely obvious what he wants. This approach, however, will turn most women off. To get a girl to chase you is simple – let her see you around other attractive women! Talk to other women, be flirting with them and having fun.

There’s really nothing that will get a woman more interested in you and want to chase you than a little friendly competition! Take advantage of that, but don’t go overboard with it. Once you and a woman establish that you’re really into each other, you want to be focused on her.

Once you’ve gotten things right on the inside and are the fun, exciting, happy, confident and kind guy that everyone wants to be around, she’s not going to be able to stop herself from liking you!

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Body Language Makes Up The Majority Of Our Communication

Believe it or not, words do not make up the majority of our communication with other people – body language does. Even when you’re talking about something to someone, if your body language is coming off as something different, the person you’re talking to is going to pay much more attention to that than the words coming out of your mouth.

When talking to women, it’s not about the pick up line or what you say, because you communicate so much more non-verbally. To successfully attract women, you want to be able to understand how people read body language and you want to make sure you’re able to use it to your advantage to convey the right message to women you’re attracted to.

Posture Is Key

Your posture is the first thing any girl is going to notice about you. Are you slumped over, looking like you’re not interested in talking to anyone and you’re hiding in your own little world, or are you standing tall, looking confident and conversing with the people around you? If you have poor posture, the first thing you want to do is consciously work on standing taller, with your shoulders back and your head up. You want to have an air of confidence about you that is immediately noticeable just by the way you carry yourself.

One good way to improve your posture is to work out regularly and strengthen your core muscles. If your core muscles are weak, they’re not going to be able to hold you up very well and you’ll be more tempted to slump over. If you work out regularly, you’re going to stand taller, walk straighter and appear more confident overall.

Make Eye Contact

Lots of guys don’t make eye contact with girls when they’re flirting simply because they’re nervous. Being nervous when talking to girls is normal, but you really want to make eye contact. There’s a reason people say that the “eyes are windows to the soul” because you can communicate so much with someone non-verbally just by looking into their eyes for a few seconds. Practice making eye contact with other people when speaking, at work or with your friends. Get comfortable looking people in the eyes in general. Then, when you meet that girl you’re really interested in, you can make eye contact with her comfortably.

Be Upbeat And Positive

Having an upbeat and positive attitude is key to attracting girls. If you’re stiff, aren’t talking to people or are being a downer, no girl is going to want to talk to you or flirt with you. However, if you’re happy, having a great conversation with those around you and look like you’re positive and confident, you’re going to draw people into your world. Girls naturally gravitate towards happy and optimistic guys, so you definitely want to be that guy.

Be An Alpha Male

Having strength and confidence usually means being an alpha male – the guy who stands out from the pack, so to speak. Being an alpha male doesn’t mean that you’re aggressive and treat women badly, it simply means being strong and confident enough to stand out from the rest of the guys around you. Ladies automatically look for the alpha male in a group of guys – so be that guy!

Portray yourself as being self-assured and having a high self esteem. Don’t be cocky, but you also don’t want to look like you’re nervous, weak or wimpy. Girls aren’t going to be attracted to you if you look like you’re a wimp who doesn’t know how to talk to a girl. An alpha male is strong, confident and sure of himself and his ability to converse with girls. He’s not afraid of making a mistake, because if he does, he’ll laugh it off. He shows confident body language and looks approachable.

Practice!

Practice putting yourself out there and practice being an alpha male. Gradually build your self confidence over time and people will begin to see that change in you and begin to perceive you as the person you’re trying to be – a better, stronger, more confident you!

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I just got out of a LTR with a guy who was a huge jerk. There’d been this guy flirting with me for months and since I was single, and he asked me out, I figured, why not?

We went out, back to his place and then we did it. And he never called me again. This loser makes my ex a great catch. Why do I keep finding these types of men?

What She Said:

Not to sound like my Grandma, but don’t let one bad apple spoil the bunch. You broke up with your ex for a reason and there’s no need to go running back to him at the first sign of bad news. Chalk it up to having fun having sex – and also one more step in moving on from your past. It’s shitty what your fling did to you – but that says everything about the type of person he can be and is no reflection on you.

I’m sure he wasn’t lying about being into you. He obviously spent time flirting and thinking about you. It’s more than likely that he dug you, but got scared at the possibility of you actually being single. You were an unobtainable fantasy that became real – and some people can’t handle real. Some guys want what they can’t have – and then don’t want it once they get it. It’s an immature side of human nature. Don’t beat yourself up over it!

Take this as a lesson. Hopefully you were safe and had fun. Now let it go.

Don’t let one night throw you back to the past. Enjoy being single! Focus on the bravery it took to split from your long-time BF and look towards a fabulous future. You have the freedom to create a new life, so get started today!

What He Said:

Shit happens. You got out of a relationship and you made a mistake. It’s a learning experience. It is not the end of the world. As long as you used protection, and you have been tested and all that, what’s the downside? You had some fun and more importantly, you learned an important lesson. Buyer beware. Just because something seems like a good idea, and people have good intentions, that’s not always the case.

And your ex isn’t better. He’s still a douchebag. You just are feeling nostalgic. There’s nothing magical that just happened to make him a better person, lover, etc. Just realize this is a thing that will pass. In time you’ll remember what a loser he is and more importantly, you will find someone better. Someone that you deserve and that makes you feel amazing. Give it time. This is a process and you’re still healing.

It’s a number’s game. Kiss enough frogs and you will find your prince. Relax and enjoy the ride. If you’re doing the work, you should just relax and expect your success. It is coming provided you put yourself out there and minimize your exposure to douchebags.

How do you do that? When you know, you know. If any guy remotely reminds you of your ex. Run. Be very conscious when making your choices and eventually, It’ll all come together.

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Why Smell Is So Important In Seduction

If a woman doesn’t like the way you smell, she’s not going to date you. It’s really very simple, although it may not even be a conscious decision for her. She may not know that she’s not attracted to you because of the way you smell – she may just not know why she doesn’t like you at all. Or, she may know that your aroma turns her off and she’ll be just as happy finding someone else to date, because you’re not doing it for her. Whether she realizes it or not, the way you smell plays a big part in whether you’re actually going to get a date or not.

A woman is going to get an impression of you based on the aromas around you – the way you smell, the way your house smells and the way your car does. These aromas are going to impact her and impact the way she feels about you, so you want to learn how to use this to your advantage and make it work for you!

Building Your Own Signature Smell

Seduction involving smell doesn’t necessarily mean you need to dump a bottle of cologne all over you and wait for the girls to come running. Sure, the deodorant commercials say that’s what will happen, but it very rarely does happen like that. What you need to do is work on building your own signature aroma – a smell that is uniquely your own.

• High quality aftershave. Don’t buy the cheap stuff, and make sure what you’re using doesn’t conflict with any of the other aromas you’re using.
• Practice good oral hygiene. Brush your teeth often, floss and use mouthwash. Carry mints or gum with you for those moments you need to freshen up. There’s nothing worse than for a girl to go in to kiss a really cute guy and be put off by nasty breath.
• Use good deodorant. Find one that works with both your natural body chemistry and smell, but also one that controls your sweating. If your sweat breaks through your deodorant, consider an anti-perspirant. If it breaks through the anti-perspirant, look for a stronger formula!
• Wash your hair. Yes, that “just rolled out of bed” look is hot right now, but you can achieve that look with a little bit of hair wax or pomade without your hair stinking like smoke from a bar or like fried food from the restaurant you were at. Use a clean smelling shampoo.
• Make sure your clothes are clean. Keep up with your laundry, and use a good smelling detergent and fabric softener. You don’t want your partner to lean in and smell your shirt during a hug and wonder how long your shirt has been laying on your bedroom floor. Make sure your clothes smell good too!

Make Sure Your Space Smells Good

So you’re fairly sure that you can be a master of seduction with aroma because you’ve covered all the bases when it comes to yourself. You’re showered, shaven, deodorized and wearing a dab of that cologne you know drives women crazy. You’re good to go, right? Nope. What happens when you bring a girl you meet home, in hopes of having sex? Does your space smell as great as you do? Is your space ready for seduction too?

• Clean up the clutter. A little clutter is fine, but if you have old Chinese take out boxes still hanging out in your trash from a few days ago, your entire place is going to stink like old Chinese food. Clean your apartment up for the most part. It doesn’t have to be perfect, but the dirty underwear has to go.
• Clean the bathroom. The bathroom is something she’ll probably use while she’s there, so you want to make sure it’s acceptable for a woman to use. That means wipe down the sink where you shave, clean the toilet (if she’s drunk and has to worship the porcelain altar at your place, you don’t want your partner to have to stick her face in a toilet that isn’t sparkling clean. You weren’t ready for this girl to see that side of you, were you?) Make sure your shower is clean and smelling fresh too – hopefully you can get invited into the shower with your partner for a nice round of shower sex!
• Use candles and incense. Sure, it may seem girly, but it will make all the difference in the world to a woman. If she walks in and it smells clean and fresh, or even warm and spicy, she’s going to be a lot more turned on than if she walks in and it smells like…well, a man’s dirty house!
• Clean out your car. If you’re going to be picking her up for a date, or she’ll be in your car at all, make sure there aren’t old burger wrappers hanging out in the backseat. Give it a good vacuum, and hang a few air fresheners from the rear view mirror. If you smoke in your car, stop! Make sure your car doesn’t smell like an ashtray, or you’ll never be a master of seduction.

Do Things With Your Partner That Involve Aroma

So now you smell great and your place smells great. It’s time to start thinking about seduction with different aromas when you take your lover out on a date. When planning a great date, think about all the different ways you can use aroma for seduction. Take your lover to a restaurant where the food smells divine and make a point to smell your food and comment on how great it is before digging in. Take your partner wine tasting where you both can enjoy the bouquets of the wine.

When getting your lover a gift, go for candles, perfumes or lotions that smell fantastic. Take it one step farther by doing some research on aromatherapy and what smells trigger what emotions. For example, men respond really well to the smell of pumpkin pie and lavender, while women really enjoy the smell of chocolate and sandalwood. Also, some aromas arouse and excite, while others relax and calm the mind. Choose an aroma that goes well with what you’re planning to do and get it in a warming oil, a candle or a stick of incense. If giving your partner a sensual massage, make sure you have a great smelling massage oil to use!

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Have Fun And Don’t Take Yourself Too Seriously

The ultimate key to flirting is to remember to relax, have fun and to not take yourself too seriously. If you’re stressed out and worried about flubbing your ” pick up lines,” you are going to flub up your lines. If you relax, take a deep breath and focus on just creating a great conversation with a girl without “lines,” you might actually have a shot.

Also, you want to adjust your tone of voice and your laughter to appear more fun and approachable. Don’t speak in a monotone voice – instead, be optimistic and let it show through in the way you speak. Also get more comfortable with laughing on demand. It may seem awkward at first when you’re still learning how to be in social situations, but it will eventually become second nature. The thing is, as you relax and learn to have fun naturally in dating situations, these things will come to you with less and less effort.

Remember to keep open body language so you look and feel approachable to women. Your body language speaks volumes about you before you even open your mouth to say a word. If you’re standing over in the corner with your arms crossed, not a single girl is going to approach you to ask if you want to dance, what your name is or anything else. Make sure your body language says that you want to be approached!

Add Gentle Touching

Gentle touching is a great way to take flirting to the next level if the girl you’re talking to is receptive to it, and if you do it right. This is not manhandling – you don’t want to grab her roughly or take her by surprise with your touch in any way. Lightly touching her arm at the right time will send shivers down her spine, and brushing her hair out of her face while she’s laughing will get her making deep eye contact with you.

Think of flirting as a game of tennis – you hit the ball, and then it’s in their court. It’s time for them to hit the ball back. This is how that fun, witty banter escalates, and you definitely want to get that witty banter going. A little teasing, a smile and some light touching gets her interested and gets you in her personal space, which is where you want to be. If she’s comfortable with you in her space, you can take flirting even further.

Get A Phone Number

You often don’t have a lot of time to ask a girl out – you might only have a lull in between songs when the band is taking a break, or her girlfriends may pull her away to dance or go do something else. If you want her phone number, you’re going to have to ask for it and soon. So as soon as you feel that chemistry building, ask for the number! Ask if you can text her (girls are more willing to give their numbers out if they think you’re going to text them before calling) or at the very least, see if you can look her up on Facebook. When that chemistry starts building, you want to lock in that phone number or a way to contact her before you lose your chance.

How To Start The Conversation

Starting a conversation with a girl can be intimidating – it takes a lot of confidence and self esteem to approach someone and start talking to them, especially if you don’t know them very well or at all. Here are some things you can say to get that conversation started:

“Wow! You are so confident! Where does that come from?”

“You seem so passionate! What is it that motivates you?”

You can also introduce yourself and ask her name, but don’t get stuck on it. A lot of girls are very leery about giving their names out up front and honestly, the name doesn’t even really matter unless you’ve got that connection going. Wait until you hit it off to ask her who she is.

Remember That Less Is More

Jumping right into flirting may not be your best bet. Girls are receptive to different things at different times. Depending on how she feels or what is going on around her, she may not be receptive to strong flirting right away. Judging a situation and whether a girl will be receptive to your approach or not will come with time and practice – you may not be able to tell very well when you first start playing the dating game, but as you do it more and more often, you’ll get a knack for feeling it out.

While it’s fun to take risks and play the dating game, you also want to take your time with it. Don’t rush through it. Enjoy the flirting phase and enjoy feeling the chemistry build. If you rush through the process, you may get to kiss her or even more, but you can’t ever go back to that fun flirting phase where everything feels new. So take your time with it, relax and have fun!

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Flirting When Exercising Together

Your workout is a great place to start. What do you and/or your significant other typically do for exercise? Is it something that you can start doing together, like running, biking or hiking? Having your S.O. there with you won’t just add to the time you spend together each day, but it will also give you both an extra incentive to stay on top of your workouts. You may even find that having a little friendly competition will push you to run faster, bike for longer, etc.

Best of all, exercise boosts your endorphins and your overall mood, along with your sex drive. If you’re both getting fit together, you just might find you’re in the mood for sex more often than before. You can even spice things up by making little bets here or there—i.e. whoever finishes your running route the fastest gets to pick the position you use in bed that night.

In addition to blending your preexisting workouts together, you might also want to look into new forms of exercise. You could both sign up for a team sport together, or start playing one-on-one basketball or tennis with each other. Better still, try taking a Latin dance class together. You’ll be surprised at how much of a workout you both get, and all that close contact is bound to put you in the mood for sex.

Flirting While Doing Chores Together

Working out together is hardly the only way to build more couple-time into your days. You can take some of your least-loved things, like chores, and use them as an excuse to get closer with your sweetheart. Turn chores into games. Divide up the house cleaning, and whoever completes their chores first each day gets to choose a sexy activity to participate in that night. Wash the dishes together, and each time the person washing or drying falls behind the other person, they have to take off one item of clothing.

Though you might be tempted to take a little extra time doing the dishes—all in the sake of stripping down to your undies—you’ll surely end up enjoying it. You can even do the whole French Maid costume thing while actually cleaning your bedroom, although you might not get very far if your partner can’t handle the wait. In general, though, one of the best things about doing all of your chores together is that the work will be evenly divided up, and you’ll ultimately end up with more downtime to spend together.

Flirting While Cooking Together

Perhaps one of the most fun everyday things you can enjoy with your partner is cooking. When you’ve both gotten home from work, instead of flipping on the TV and waiting for takeout to arrive, try making dinner together. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy. It just needs to be something that you can both cook together. Take turns being the head cook and the assistant cook so no one ever feels like they’re secondary. Food is highly sensual.

It’s said that, outside of actually having sex, feeding someone you’re attracted to is one of the most sexual things out there. So don’t be afraid to taste test with each other as you go. Licking a little of that sauce off your partner’s finger certainly can’t hurt. You’re not at a restaurant, either, so you can feel free to cook in an apron and nothing else if you’d like. Just don’t set the kitchen on fire if you get too distracted with each other.

Whether you’re racing each other down the block or playing naughty chefs, the key to spicing up everyday life is simple. Involve your partner in your routine and try to put a positive, sexy spin on otherwise mundane things. The more often you do it, the more natural it will seem to find joy in everything simply by being together.

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Things To Consider Before The Kiss

Many guys fail to plan for a kiss, either because they know they’re too nervous to initiate the kiss, or they just don’t think the girl will want to kiss them. Either way, these guys end up getting stuck right before the kiss worrying about their breath because they just ate hot wings and didn’t bring mints, or because their lips are chapped and aren’t soft enough for a good kiss. Don’t be one of those guys – make sure you are prepared for a kiss before you actually get one by assuming you will get one!

Good Dental Hygiene

This one may seem like a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised at just how many guys think they can get away without brushing their teeth, using floss and mouthwash or not using gum or mints after they’ve eaten something pungent like onions or garlic. Making sure that your mouth is fresh and clean at all times is the first thing you should do to prepare for kiss. Heck, bring a toothbrush with you if you have to!

Smell Good

Women are attracted to scent. Make sure you carry mints or breath freshener with you, and also wear deodorant that works. Make sure you also chose a cologne that isn’t too overpowering but that also compliments your natural pheromones. If you need help with that, get a friend that is a girl to go cologne shopping with you!

Have A Confident, Masculine Energy About You

Women are attracted to confidence as well. If you act like a wimpy guy who needs her “permission” before going any farther, she’s not going to look twice at you. Convey an energy of confidence and masculinity. Don’t ask if you can buy her a drink – wait until she’s nearly finished with hers and order another for her.

Get In Her Space

A girl probably isn’t going to go out of her way to kiss you. So get in her space – make sure she knows you’re there. Make eye contact with her and touch her lightly on the arm. Flirt with her and get her laughing and interested in what you’re saying. Make sure you ignite that emotional spark she needs to want to get closer to you.

Try scooting your chair a little closer to her or brushing past her on your way to the bar or restroom. See how she reacts to you getting in her space. If she seems to welcome it, that’s your cue to take it a little farther.

Be A Little Touchy-Feely

No, you don’t need to feel your date up. But you do want to get a little closer to her and start touching her when she seems like she’s ready for it. Touch her hair or stroke her cheek gently. Place your hand on her thigh as she’s speaking to you or telling you a joke or story. Hold hands with her – women love hand holding!

Get her to notice your mouth and start thinking about kissing you by licking your lips. Don’t bite your lips if you’re a guy – that’s generally going to make you look a little foolish! Girls can get away with it, but guys? No way. Drink your drink slowly, or through a straw. Whatever you can do to get your date to start noticing your mouth is a great way to get her started thinking about kissing you.

Don’t Be Afraid To Make The First Move

This goes back to having that strong, confident, masculine energy about you. Don’t appear too weak or wimpy by not being able or willing to make the first move. Whether you actually make the first move or not is irrelevant – she will sense that you’re into her and will make a move on her as soon as you get a clear window. She may very well beat you to it!

Go In Strong And Smooth

If you do end up making the first move, don’t sweat it. Be confident about it. Go in smoothly, and don’t make any sudden moves. You don’t want to bump heads or end up kissing her nose, do you? Find out if she wants to take it to the next level by leaning in part of the way and putting yourself in her space, and waiting for her to meet you halfway. Does she lean in for the kiss too, or does she pull away?

If It Doesn’t Happen The Right Way

Sometimes, a first kiss doesn’t go down the way you wanted it to, no matter how much you prepared and planned for it. If this happens to you, relax! Take a few steps back. Keep flirting with her and having fun together, and don’t let the moment get too awkward. It just may not have been the right time or place, or she just might not have felt like it!

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Words Are Very Powerful!

Don’t underestimate the power that language has on a woman. Certain phrases can trigger thoughts,emotions and fantasies and can easily affect how a person feels in both good and bad ways. There’s no denying that words can be used to affect someone in many different scenarios. You can also read into the way another person is feeling and thinking by paying attention to the words they’re using in a conversation.

Of course, not just any word is going to make someone upset, happy, angry or excited. It’s the use of emotional language that does that. Emotional language is certain phrases that evoke emotion in someone, whether it makes them feel good or bad or anything in between. You can use innocent words to turn a woman on, or make her feel happy or ecstatic. So it’s no surprise that you can affect how a woman feels just by paying attention to the words you’re using and using the right phrases to make her feel the way you want her to!

Actions Speak Too

Remember that even if you take the best love advice to heart and use the right phrases to win a woman over, you’re still not going to get very far if you don’t follow them up with the right actions. If you’re going to “talk the talk” so to speak, you’ve got to be willing to “walk the walk.” If you say something flirty and nice, and then turn around and do something else that negates what you just said, any girl is going to be able to spot you as a fake. Make sure that your actions go along with what you’re saying and that you’re being genuine about it.

Examples Of Things To Say

Here are some excellent examples of phrases that are going to evoke emotion in a woman:

• Happy – “I feel so happy being with you!”
• Excited – “I’m so excited to see you.”
• Love – “I love it when you….”
• Adore – “I adore you!”
• Confident – “You make me feel confident.”
• Amazing – “I feel amazing around you.”
• Incredible “You’re incredible!”

Using Words The Right Way

To have the impact you want on a woman when using language, it’s important that you pay attention and use it the right way. Avoid talking about things that create a negative energy around you, such as talking about your problems or complaining about the things around you. If you’re creating negative energy around you, you’re not going to be able to make anyone feel good regardless of what language you’re using.

Pay Attention To The Words She’s Using As Well

Women communicate with words much, much more than guys do. In fact, it’s estimated that women use on average 15,000 words a day while men use about 6,000 – so you can pretty much guarantee that she’s going to let you know how she feels and what she’s thinking in her language, even if she doesn’t come right out and say it. Listen to the hidden meaning behind the words she’s using and look for the emotions buried within.

Is she using phrases that suggest she wants to touch or kiss you? Are the phrases she’s using suggesting that she’s happy or having a good time? If so, you’re definitely on the right track! Alternatively, watch for phrases that suggest she’s not having fun or that she isn’t interested in you at all. A lot of guys don’t pay attention to it when a woman makes it clear that she’s not interested in them, simply because it’s not what they want to hear.

Consider Taking A Language Course

Because women use words so much more than men, if you want to really understand girls and how they think, you might want to consider taking a course on the subject. Becoming more knowledgeable about how people use language and the meanings behind certain phrases is going to help you indefinitely when it comes to understanding and talking to women. If you don’t want to take a course, there is tons of information out there on the Internet to help you learn to understand language and how people use it to communicate with each other!

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Are Poems Lame?

A lot of guys think that using poetry as part of their seduction tactics is lame. However, there’s a reason most guys think poems aren’t cool – they’re not hardwired to respond to poems like women are. From a guy’s point of view, poetry isn’t going to get you anywhere. Fortunately, you’re looking for things to make a woman swoon. So throw out all of your preconceived notions about poems! You can learn how to use a few simple lines of poetry to make a girl melt, almost guaranteed.

So does reciting poems and employing that old school romance make you look like a fool in front of women? Not hardly! When done the right way, it shows that you have enough strength and inner confidence to try something new and different. Guys who are too “manly” to get in touch with their romantic side like this aren’t going to get very far with the ladies. Using poems as part of your seduction techniques is what is going to make you stand out from the crowd – which is important if you really want the ladies to notice you!

Don’t Be The Guy She Thinks Would Use Poems

If you’re the wimpy, super romantic type of guy who uses poetry and no one is surprised by it, you’re not going to get a lot of women to notice you. To make this seduction tactic to work well for you, you actually have to be the kind of guy that no one would expect to use poems. You have to be very strong, confident and assertive. Be a little bit of a “manly man” on the outside, because that is what’s going to make it so surprising and incredible when you start breaking out the poems.

You want to show her the soft, sweet side of you, but you want to make her believe that she is the only one who gets to see that romantic side. If you’re sweet and romantic all the time, this isn’t going to be believable. To make this work well, you have to be strong enough on the inside to let the romantic side out of you and make yourself vulnerable to her. Really make her feel that she’s the only girl who gets to see this side of you.

Benefits Of Using Poetry

• Not many guys are actually doing this. It’s a great way to stand out from the crowd and make yourself noticeable.
• Girls love it. Women respond much better to language than anything else. By reciting poems to her, you’re actually speaking a “language” she can understand – which can be better than anything you can buy her or do for her to show her you’re into her. Language is key with women!
• You’ll surprise her with that aspect of your personality and it will make you look like there’s more to you than meets the eye – which is extremely attractive to girls!

Don’t Overdo It

Just like with anything else, if you do it too much, it’s going to boring, monotonous and it’s going to get lame. You definitely don’t want to overdo it when it comes to using poems during seduction. If you do, she’ll love it at first, and then begin to get tired of it. She’ll want to see and experience something new and if you’re doing the same thing over and over again, she’ll look for that something “new” in someone else. Think of poetry as your secret seduction weapon that you save for just the right time and place, and you only use it occasionally. Mix it up with flirting and other tactics to keep her interested.

How To Come Up With The Right Poems

If you’re not very good with the written word, or struggle with writing good poetry, look online for some poems that you can recite to her instead. Don’t be afraid to take some creative license with a poem that is already written and make it your own. Make sure to choose a poem that is short and sweet – a long Shakespearean poem is going to bore both you and your partner by the third verse, unless you’re both really into Shakespeare. Remember to have fun with it and don’t make it too serious!

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Give Her Space

For a girl to actually want to go after you, she has to actually have room to go after you. If smothering her with attention and asking her out on dates all the time, she’s going to get sick of you being in her space and she’s going to start running. A girl who feels smothered or trapped isn’t going to want to go after you at all – she’ll be wanting to get away from you at every possible turn. At first, this is just because she needs to “breathe” – it doesn’t mean that she doesn’t like you anymore. However, if you continue to smother her and stay in her space without giving her a chance to recoup, she’s going to try to get away – and stay away.

Let her develop her own life. In fact, encourage it! Make sure she spends time with her friends and you spend time with yours. Have a life outside of your friendship or relationship and make sure she does too. By giving her space, you’re ensuring that she has time to think about you and miss you – after which, she’ll start to go after you!

Let The Attraction Unfold Naturally

This is perhaps one of the most important parts of dating and getting a woman to want to go after you instead of the other way around. Far too many guys “try” too hard to win a woman’s attention and affection, which really has the opposite effect. She’s not going to be very attracted when you’re constantly in her space.

Attraction doesn’t often happen instantly – it’s something that needs to grow over time. When a man tries too hard, he stifles that natural process. The woman he’s interested in is so busy trying to get away that there’s no time for that attraction and sexual tension to develop. Enjoy being together, but don’t start out with high expectations of where the friendship is going to go or if you’re going to get into a monogamous, serious relationship any time soon. Instead, learn to enjoy the moments you have together and let nature take it’s course!

Dating Isn’t The Same As It Used To Be

Women aren’t sitting around anymore waiting for a guy to ask them out. In fact, it’s quite a bit different from the “days of old.” Women hold a lot of power in the dating scene and they’re often the ones who call the shots. The ratio of available guys to women are a bit skewed these days – about 5% of the single male population are the ones getting all the girls, and the other 95% is wondering what happened!

How To Be In The 5%

Look around and take note of all the guys out there that are getting women. What are they doing? How do they dress? How do they act? What are they saying? Chances are, they’re not offering up some cheesy pick up lines. What you’ll notice is that these guys appear strong, confident and independent to the women around them.

They have a life of their own, they have passions and they carry themselves with an aura of confidence and high self esteem. Does that mean you have to be cocky to get women to want to go out with you? Not hardly. But if you’re a wimp who is always asking “permission” for things or apologizing for things, you’re not going to get very far at all.

Learn to be that strong, confident guy. Learn to like yourself for who you are and be yourself when you go into the dating scene. You have something of value to offer – now you just have to believe it.

Develop A Magnetic Personality

For women to approach you, you’ve got to put yourself out there. Be someone who is magnetic, flirtatious, charming and really fun to be around. Have that core inner strength and happiness that radiates outward to other people. This is probably the number one piece of dating advice – if you don’t do anything else, do this. Having a personality that people want to be around is the first step to attracting friends and getting women to go after you – instead of you always having to ask them out!

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Question: Hi Dan and Jenn. I’m a new subscriber. I’ve watched a few of your videos so far but haven’t found one that answers my specific question. I was wondering if it’s okay to ask for a womens number while they’re working? The specific place I’m curious about is Subway. I’ve heard it’s not kosher to do this. Thanks in advance and I hope to learn a lot!

–YouTube Viewer

Dating Won’t Happen Unless You Ask First

The first thing that guys have to understand about the dating process is that it’s probably not going to happen unless YOU do the asking. So you’re pretty much guaranteed a “no” if you don’t ask a woman out. So gather up your courage, and get ready to make the first move!

If You Share A Workplace

When most guys think about asking a girl out at work, it usually means he’s romantically interested in a woman that he is employed with. Generally speaking, this is almost always a bad idea! If you get involved in a relationship with someone you are employed with and things end badly, it can definitely make for quite an awkward situation later. Also, some companies have strict policies against dating at work, and it could cause you to lose your job. It might also end well, so you never know until you try. Just be aware that you’re taking a risk when you consider dating someone that you’re employed with.

At Your Potential Date’s Workplace

The situation is a little different when you talk about how to approach women at their place of business. For example, if the woman you’re interested in works at a restaurant or a hotel that you frequent, there’s no reason not to ask her out there. However, there are some rules that you want to follow if you’re thinking about approaching a woman where she works to ask her out on a date.

Do Not Go At Peak Hours

Every place of business has peak hours, especially restaurants. Never try to ask a woman out at a time where she’s slammed with customers, the boss is watching or she is too busy with other things. This will get you brushed off immediately, even though she may actually be interested in dating you. Timing is everything in this type of situation and if you do it at the wrong time, you’re just not going to get anywhere. Wait until she’s not busy with customers or other things, so she actually has time to process what you’re saying.

Make Sure You’re Able To Get One On One Time

This really goes for when you ask anyone anything – you really want to be one one one with that person, rather than having a bunch of other people listening in on the conversation you’re trying to have. Have the confidence to approach the girl you like when she’s alone.

Establish A Vibe

Going up to a woman you like and asking for a phone number right off the bat probably isn’t going to end well, even if you are one on one with her and no one else is watching or listening. So start flirting with her a little first. Smile at her, joke a little and make eye contact. Establish a connection or vibe first, before you suggest taking her out on a date. It’s more likely that she’ll be interested in dating you if you flirt a little first.

If She Rejects You

Depending on how you’ve set things up (and whether she’s really interested in you or not), you may very well get rejected. Don’t take it personally, especially if you’ve approached her at a bad time. You can always try again at another time. However, if she turns down your dating offer more than once, it’s safe to say that it’s not your timing that is the issue here. Remember that dating is all about having fun and meeting new people – so if you strike out more than once with one particular woman, remember that there are more out there that you could have an even better connection with. Don’t assume that if this one rejects you that it’s all over – because it’s not!

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What She Said:

1. Buy her drinks. (The goal is tipsy, not passed out.)
2. Give her lots of attention and flatter her.
3. Proposition her directly – she might be so shocked by your honesty that she may take you up on it.
4. Hit the dance floor at a crowded club and see what happens…
5. Attend a raging party with the “hook up” goal in mind and start scoping the crowd.

Buy Her Drinks

Honestly, alcohol is the most common component in a one-night stand. Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you are aware that alcohol lessens inhibitions. But here is where you absolutely need to pay attention – you’re looking for girl who is getting tipsy because she also WANTS to get laid. This must be mutual. You’re looking for a fun night – you don’t want to add “date rapist” to your resume. Seriously.

Compliment Her

Be clear with your hook up. Have the balls to be a man and act responsibly. If you’re not looking for anything serious, let her know up front. It’s not sexy to take advantage of someone emotionally – it’s gross. The fact that you’re both going to use condoms should be a given – you most likely won’t have time to run out and get an STD panel. This is one night – not something you want to live with for the rest of your life, in virtually all aspects.

Be Confident, Respectful And Honest

What’s the best way to hook up? Be confident, be respectful and be honest. If you can’t be any of those things, please do women of the world a favor and masturbate at home with some lotion and this month’s Playboy.

What He Said

1. Great chocolate
2. Hang out at male strip clubs/gay bars
3. Hook up websites
4. Bars, bars, bars
5. Honesty

Chocolate Is The Female Viagra

Great chocolate is female Viagra. Period. End of story. All you need to do is find out whether she likes light or dark and then seek out the best, most expensive and amazing chocolatier in your city. Get her a piece or two. Hand it to her and insist she eat it there right in front of you. Watch the look on her face (that’s the face of her having a food orgasm for those of you keeping score at home), then just try not to fuck up the rest of the date until you get home that night, assuming there is a rest of the date after that.

Frequent Gay Bars

I have a friend who is hugely successful hooking up with chicks and he only goes to gay bars and male strip clubs. Why? Do the words “shooting fish in a barrel” mean anything to you? Women love gay bars because they feel safe, their guards are down, but they’re also going to get drunk and horny, and a Chippendale dancer is man’s best friend. Those women will lose their minds over those hard bodies and then they’ll want something else hard and you’ll be there to give it to them.

There are a plethora of adult websites, such as Adult Friend Finder. Put up a profile and go to town.

Bars in general are where girls go to hook up, go there, and do a lap. On that lap, make eye contact with every girl. If they break away, don’t bother. If they keep eye contact, it’s on.

Be Honest With Her

Chicks dig honesty. If you tell her straight up you just want some ass, you’re giving her the gift of choice. She can take it or leave it, but there’s no illusions about what the choices are. She will like that. That may mean she likes your brains out or not. But put it out there. It’s her choice.

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It can be very exciting when the time comes for you and your significant other to take your first vacation together. Time away from your everyday surroundings and obligations can make for a truly wonderful bonding experience. But travels don’t always go as planned, and you may find yourself encountering a side of your partner you don’t find very attractive. How can you make sure that your trip goes smoothly? Lots of advance planning helps, along with patience and a good sense of humor.

Plan Ahead!

It’s always important to have a rock solid plan when you’re traveling, but never more so than when it’s the first time in the relationship that you and your mate go away together. The better you plan, the less you’ll have to worry over during the trip. First and foremost, make sure to pick a place you’re both truly interested in visiting. Since it’s your first trip together, unless you’re both seasoned travelers, you should probably stay closer to home.

A domestic destination promises a shorter flight, no need for passports, and no language barrier to worry about. It can also make for a more affordable trip, which can help eliminate a common traveling worry—overspending. Minimizing stressors before you’ve even stepped into the airport can be very helpful. Speaking of airports, you’ll also need to decide on a mode of transportation. For a first trip, flying or taking a train is probably your best option.

Road trips are notorious for quickly going from great to terrible; you can get lost, your car can break down, etc. While flying and taking the train also have their drawbacks, at least neither of you will be directly to blame if something does go wrong. After settling on a destination and a mode of transportation, make sure to pick your accommodations together. Agree ahead of time on how you’ll pay for your lodgings, so you won’t have to worry about it later.

Allow For Extra Time & Plan What To Pack

A few days prior to your trip, plan how you’ll be getting to the airport or train station. Establish a meeting time and place that allows you both extra time to get there. If one of you cuts it too close and is late, you’ll be starting your romantic getaway with a guaranteed fight. Next, plan what to pack together. You want to make sure that both of you bring the right clothing for any activities that either of you have in mind, like a fancy dinner out, hiking, swimming, etc. That way, none of your plans will be ruined because someone doesn’t have the right clothing to participate.

You should also make sure you both pack a few things to keep you entertained on the journey. You’ll want to bring a couple of things you can enjoy together, like playing cards. However, you shouldn’t assume that your mate will stay awake and entertain you through the whole flight. Bring a book or an MP3 player in case your S.O. falls asleep while you’re en route.

Remember To Have Fun!

Once you’ve arrived, let the fun begin. Different people have different traveling styles, so you may discover that you’re more laidback, while the person you’re in a relationship with is a scheduler. If you two don’t see eye to eye on how to manage your daily activities, try to compromise. Block out half of the day to be spontaneous and the other half to stick to an itinerary. Being able to compromise during your vacation won’t just make your trip easier, but will also demonstrate that you are generally considerate.

What if you encounter a traveling disaster? How you handle little road bumps will say a lot about you as a person and a partner. Try not to panic or go into heavy complaint mode. Remain calm, help your mate calm down as well, and remind yourselves that you’re just on vacation. Don’t let someone’s lost wallet or an extreme flight delay ruin your entire trip. Showing some grace under pressure and keeping things light will turn you into a hero.

Don’t Let A Bad Vacation Ruin Your Relationship

What if the vacation disaster is that you really don’t like being with your boyfriend or girlfriend 24/7? The best thing you can do is suck it up and weather the trip, then get home and think about where your relationship is headed. Don’t do anything rash when you’re away from home. While a vacation together can teach you a lot about each other, you shouldn’t let one bad week in unfamiliar territory ruin your entire relationship. Of course, most vacations go wonderfully, and you may return more in love than ever before. Planning ahead and staying flexible once you arrive will certainly help toward getting that happy result.

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What She Said

1. Zumba classes
2. The library
3. Coffee shop
4. Grocery store
5. Happy hour at a wine bar

A Zumba (Or Other Exercise) Class

Want to get your groove on? Try a Zumba class! That’s where all the fit chicks will be dancing in tight-fitting workout clothes. You’ll stand out in a sea of ladies – and women dig a man with enough balls to enroll in a dance class. Bonus – you’ll be getting in even more shape!

The Library

Meeting a woman at the library is one of the older dating tips, but it’s a good one. It means the woman you have your eye on is probably well read, which can lead to an intellectual connection. While “book smart” might not be number one on your list, think of it this way – most women connect intellectually and emotionally before hitting the sack. Besides, if you’re looking for a girlfriend and not just sex, you’ll be happy knowing you’ve found someone you can talk to.

A Coffee Shop

Ah, coffee shops – the liquid matchmaker of our modern times. Starbucks is probably indirectly responsible for helping create as many babies as they are non-fat vanilla lattes. Hanging at your local caffeine peddler’s place is a great way to read the Sunday paper – and scope out potential dates.

The Grocery Store

Most people are creatures of habit and this is where the grocery store comes in. Given our hectic schedules during the workweek, most folks finding themselves usually doing their food shopping at the same time each week. This give you the opportunity to chat with a crush in the soup aisle until it’s time to make your move and go out on a date.

Bars

Once again, bars are more known for one night stands than long-term unions – but there are exceptions to every rule. Hard alcohol usually means “party time,” while a wine bar generally indicates civilized sipping. Meeting up over a glass of wine is a great way to relax and get to know someone. Once again, most creatures of habit tend to frequent the same Happy Hour each week, which gives you the opportunity to get to know someone over repeated run-ins.

What He Said

1. Educational classes
2. Fitness classes
3. Yoga Retreats
4. Eat, Pray, Lovebook club
5. Subway

Educational Classes

Chicks dig learning, more so than guys. For women, life is a journey. For men, it’s a destination, so if you’re into learning (or can fake it) you have a natural in with women. One of the best dating tips is to take a class in something you might be interested in or that a woman you’re attracted to might be interested. You’ll be good to go.

Fitness Classes

Men go to the gym. Women go to classes at the gym. Big difference. You’ll see a totally different group of people in those fitness classes than you will walking around the weight room, which by definition is a sausage fest. Go, become a regular and then you’ll get credibility (she’ll think you’re really into that class as opposed to being the creepy guy just going to classes to pick up chicks that you are). Use that credibility to strike up a conversation and boom! You’re in.

A Yoga Retreat

Yoga retreats have a pretty standard 90% women to 10% guys ratio. You’re on vacation, her stress, worry and inhibitions are back and home, what happens on retreat stays on retreat…you do the math.

Eat, Pray, Love Book Club

Eat, Pray, Love will get you a woman. Period. I’ll explain, while on a yoga retreat (where I learned the 90/10 rule), every woman was talking about how that book changed their lives (it’s literally a cult, that book), so when I got home I ran to the book store and bought it and started reading it, and carrying around with me so I could sneak in a few pages wherever I went. Women were stopping me left and right. They couldn’t believe I was reading this book (NOTE: you will need to actually read it. It won’t work otherwise, and these women WILL quiz you on it). Buy it, read it, and it’s on.

A Subway Restaurant

Hanging out at a Subway is one of the surprisingly good dating tips that help you meet a woman and see what’s she’s into. If she orders a foot long, let her pass. If she orders the six inch, it’s on! Seriously though, if you’re trying to meet women, set a goal of talking to twenty hot chicks a day and don’t go to sleep until you to. Do that for a week. Pretty soon you’ll see the obvious: hot chicks are everywhere. You don’t have to worry about going to a specific place. It’s always on.

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What She Said:

1. The Gym
2. A Sports Bar
3. The Library
4. A Farmer’s Market
5. Through Friends

The Gym

The gym is a fun place to meet men. It instantly shows that you’re both into taking care of yourselves physically – and being physically fit usually leads to a healthier frame of mind. A gym membership also gives you the opportunity to run into the guy you’re crushing on. Perhaps you’re in the same spin class or are hitting the treadmill at 6 PM everyday. It’s a great opportunity for flirting.

A Sports Bar

A bar might sound like a no go – but I find a sports bar to be a great place to gather socially. There’s a reason to be there, as well as a community spirit in watching a game. Most guys are sharing pitchers of beer instead of shots – not always the case, of course. But loosening up over a few brews is a little more civilized than tequila shooters. This is you looking for a mate – not Spring Break. Much like the gym, frequenting your local sports hangout during football season gives you reason to run into your crush again and again.

The Library

I’m a fan of a guy with smarts – thus the library is a favorite haunt when on the hunt. In this day and age of endless media, Kindle and iPads it’s nice to share camaraderie with someone who still appreciates holding literature in his hands.

A Farmer’s Market

A Farmer’s Market is usually held on the same day of the week during the season – which, once again, provides the opportunity to seek out your gentleman crush on a regular basis. Plus all that organic produce is good for you!

Through Friends

While the set up via friends can be rife with complications, it’s also been known to create love matches as well. Besides, it’s free – unlike an online dating service, which doesn’t come with friend-approved references. Ultimately, the best way to meet a great guy is to be a great gal. Be happy with who you are and the right guy will most likely gravitate towards you. Don’t be afraid to take chances in the meantime!

What He Said:

Let me start out with where NOT to find a guy: through your friends. Yes, yes, I know. Jenna recommended it, but for my money, finding a mate through a friend is like borrowing money from (or loaning money to) a family member: it always ends badly.  It’s best not to add that dimension to your relationship. That being said, the top five places to meet a guy are:

1. The Gym
2. Hardware/Grocery Stores
3. Classes
4. Online Dating Sites
5. Sports Bars

Gyms & Sports Bars

The gym and sports bars are by their definition, sausagefests.  Yes, I know women go to the gym, but they take classes more than they work out. Dress like as hot as possible in the most flattering workout clothes you can find, and your set. Sports bars are even easier. Just get yourself a jersey and the tightest jeans you can (they should make your butt look ah-mazing), grab a beer and wait. Men will be all over you.

Hardware/Grocery Stores

Home Depot and other home improvement stores are great to meet guys. You don’t see many women there, and if they are there they are with their mates. Go in and look clueless and ask a hot guy for help. The same goes for any store, really. Grocery stores, anywhere. Just ask a guy for help and you’re good.

Classes

Classes are a great place to meet guys. Figure out what kind of guy you want and figure out what he might be interested in and take a class in that and you will have an organic reason to talk to each other and you might even get put into a study group!

Online Dating Sites

Online dating sites are great! I know, I know. There are a lot of creepy guys out there, but the odds on most online dating sites work in your favor. You just put up a profile and pick and choose who you want to meet.

Trust me, if you consistently put yourself out there, you will find someone!  Enjoy the process!

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Sweet guys are great, but men that are too sweet don’t attract many women because of their decided lack of backbone. Fortunately, there’s a compromise – you CAN be a “nice” guy, but you can also be strong and assertive – which is totally attractive to women. Here’s how to be the kind of man she REALLY wants.

Do Girls Really Like Bad Boys?

It’s a common belief that girls like bad boys – but is it true? Not exactly. Girls like the idea of a bad boy, but they really like the nice guys better. Women like the idea that a man can be strong, confident and a little naughty, but they don’t like being treated badly like so many “bad” boys do. Most women like nice guys better – as long as they’re not too nice.

Nice Doesn’t Have To Equal Wimpy And Submissive

Women want a strong, confident man. That’s why they often gravitate to the “bad boys.” Initially, a woman can be smitten with the confident persona that a guy like this puts on, but for long term relationships it almost never works out. Women want to be treated well and a lot of these type of guys tend to be more aggressive and demeaning towards women. Not at first, of course, because in any dating situation, a man is going to put is best foot forward to try to seduce a woman. However, as time goes on, he starts becoming more comfortable with her and may end up treating her less like his girlfriend and more like an object.

So being a “bad boy” isn’t going to get you very far with women – but being “nice” doesn’t mean that you have to be wimpy and submissive. In fact, women really don’t like wimpy or submissive guys. You can be nice, courteous and respectful towards a girl without giving up your confidence. In fact, being respectful and kind while still being strong and confident is what is most attractive to women!

Don’t Get Caught Being “Too” Sweet

Part of being this kind of man is listening to a girl, being there for her, complimenting her, etc. But you don’t want to get caught being too sweet, because this can have the opposite effect. If you’re really going overboard, you’re going to give off that “wimpy” vibe, which is exactly what you DON’T want to do.

If you’re being too sweet, you’re going to end up getting stuck in the friend zone – where she talks to you about all her problems because you’re such a great listener like her girlfriends! You don’t want to get in this mess either. You want to be a strong, confident sweet guy that makes her feel great – not like she’s sitting down for a gab-fest with one of her best friends.

Know How To Be Firm And Assertive When The Situation Calls For It

Part of the difference between wimps and men who are sweet but also strong and confident is that strong, confident men know exactly how to be firm and assertive when the situation calls for it. Wimpy guys are sweet and sensitive ALL the time, and this isn’t going to get you anywhere with a woman. A woman wants a guy who can man up if need be.

Don’t be too needy, too clingy or wishy-washy in your decisions. When dating, be assertive enough to choose the restaurant you’re going to take her to, but nice enough to open the door and pull out the chair for her. Don’t order FOR her, but ask her what she’d like and then tell the wait staff. There are lots of ways to show a woman that you’re confident enough to run the show, but also that you’re going to treat her the way she deserves to be treated.

You WILL Get Rejected At Some Point

Not every woman is going to say “yes” when you ask her out, even when you have the right persona. This is something you’re going to have to come to terms with – because even if you think you’re saying and doing everything perfectly, not every woman is going to respond to what you’ve got to offer. However, realizing that this is just part of it is what is going to get you past it. When you are confident enough to get rejected without taking it too personally, you’ll start getting rejected less and less.

Be Genuine

While learning how to be a sweet guy is great for getting the ladies, make sure you’re actually being genuine about it and that this is who you really want to be. If you’re faking it to manipulate a girl into feeling a certain way by pretending you’re someone you’re not, any relationship you get into isn’t going to last long before the girl figures out what is really going on.

Don’t be ashamed of who you are and don’t be too nervous to show the REAL you to a woman. If you don’t, she will eventually get to know the real you and realize that it’s not who you were at the beginning. Love yourself for who you are and use that to be authentic with a woman. Being authentic is what will help you find women that you’re actually compatible with!

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Women Love Romance

Almost every woman loves romance – they love to be sweet talked and told how beautiful they are or how much they mean to a guy. This is another one of those big “men are different than women” things – men don’t put as much stock into words themselves as women do. Words mean a lot to women and with the right words, you can have direct entry into a woman’s heart. If you say the right things, you’ll make a woman melt almost immediately!

Compliments To Use

When you compliment a woman, what you say goes directly into her brain and into her heart. She’ll remember what you said for weeks, months or even years and if it’s something really special, she’ll never forget it. Here are some great compliments to use when you want to make a woman swoon:

• Start any sentence with “I love it when you….” Fill in the blank with something she does that you think is cute or that makes your life easier. This can be really effective if you know she goes out of her way to do something for you. Telling her you love this shows her that a) you noticed that she did it and b) that you appreciate it. That kind of compliment is golden!
• “You make me….” Use this one to tell her about something she does to make your life better in some way. Women love to fix their guys – so tell her something that she’s done for you that makes things easier or better for you.
• Compliment her in ways that make her feel like she’s the only woman in the world. Make her feel like she’s truly unique, special and there’s no one else in the world like her. Tell her why she’s perfect for you and how she’s absolutely irreplaceable.

Old Favorites

There are some sayings that have been around for awhile that still work – in fact, these phrases are probably what you’d consider to be a “hammer” in your compliment tool belt. Nothing new or fancy, but these phrases definitely do the trick.

• Saying “I love you” is always in style. Of course, you want to make sure that you’re in that stage of your relationship before you bust out the L-word. If you just met that day, this probably isn’t appropriate to use.
• Tell her that she’s beautiful. Use the word “beautiful” – you may think that “hot” equates to the same thing, but for a woman, it doesn’t. If you tell her that she’s “hot,” she’ll think you regard her as more of an object than a person. Tell her how breathtaking she looks instead.

Being Genuine Is Everything

Don’t just say empty words when you give a woman a compliment. She will see right through it before you even finish getting the sentence out of your mouth. Make sure that you mean what you say! Because women speak in the language of emotions, it’s important to attach your emotions to everything you say. Yes, you’re making yourself a little more vulnerable this way, but it’s exactly what is going to make the difference to your woman.

Pick up lines aren’t what you want to use to give your partner or a woman you like a genuine compliment. What you say needs to come directly from your heart – not memorized beforehand. When talking to a woman, don’t over-exaggerate. Be honest and put the real you out there.

Have A Positive Focus

When wooing a woman with romance, you want to make sure that what you’re saying has a positive focus. Stay focused on talking about the things you like about your woman, not the things that you don’t like.  A great way to be positive is to be kind and appreciative of the thinks you like about your partner about of the things she does for you to make your life better.

Actions do speak louder than words, so you also want to make sure that you’re doing kind things in addition to saying nice and sweet things to your woman. If you’re saying one thing but doing another, you’re only going to confuse or upset her. Here’s how to really show a woman that she’s important to you:

• Spend time with her. If you’re on the phone, get off and talk to her instead.
• Make eye contact with her. Show her you care about her through your eyes.
• Show her that you’re grateful for her being in your life.
• Show her that she’s important to you and you’re happy she’s there with you.

If you compliment a woman and show her that you really care, you’ll make her melt in no time!

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It’s hard to think that “opposites attract” would have become such a common saying if there weren’t some truth in it. What does it really mean, though? Can you be total opposites in every way and still make for a perfect love match? Or do some opposites work together better than others? If you find yourself attracted to someone who seems really different from you, how can you tell if it will be more than a passing fling?

What Is So Different?

The first thing to address is exactly what’s so different about you and your new love interest. Maybe you like different types of music or different movies and TV shows. Perhaps you love to read fictional novels and your new partner only reads nonfiction. Maybe he or she doesn’t enjoy reading at all. Some people would worry that, without common hobbies or interests, you will run out of things to talk about early on in your relationship.

That’s not necessarily true, however. Perhaps you’re both open-minded types who are generally curious. In that case, you might end up learning about a lot of new things through your partner, and vice versa. Your differences may end up being the very things that keep you the most interested in each other.

How Far Do Your Opposite Qualities Go?

What if your opposite qualities go beyond things like hobbies, though? What if your very personalities are what make you opposites? Sometimes that can be a good thing. If you’re a big talker and your partner is more of an observer and listener, you may find that you’re extremely well matched. If one of you is more of a control freak and the other likes to go with the flow, the Type B person may be perfectly fine with letting the Type A one make all the decisions.

In fact, that pairing would probably be far less disastrous than getting two bossy Type A folks together. Other opposite pairings probably wouldn’t fair as well. If you’re a neat freak and your new boyfriend or girlfriend is a slob, it’s highly likely you’ll be experiencing problems the minute you start living together. If you’re a goody two shoes dating a bad boy or girl, it may seem fun for now. As things get more serious further down the line, however, you may find that his or her unwillingness to shape up is incredibly unattractive.

Breaking It Down Logically

The best way to figure out if your opposite qualities can meld to form a happy relationship is to think about them logically. Try to imagine your new significant other’s traits in someone who you don’t find sexually attractive. Would you want to be that person’s friend, or would you dislike spending time with them? If the latter is true, then the only reason you’re really into Mister or Miss Opposite is that you find them physically attractive.

Aging happens, and they might not be so hot several years from now. You don’t want to stick with someone who you won’t enjoy talking to once their looks fade. If you do think that you’d still want to hang out with them, then your opposite traits and interests are working in your favor. People often wonder how a staunch Republican and a lifelong Democrat can fall in love, but it happens.

Whether they’re both impressed by their mutual passion for politics, or they both get a kick out of debating each other, there are certain kinds of people who can make their differences work for them. If you’re one of those people, you just might find that your perfect love match is your polar opposite.

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Wait Until You Know That She Wants To Be Kissed

You don’t want to surprise a woman with a kiss when she’s not ready, because it can totally backfire and depending on the woman’s mood, it could ruin the whole evening. You want to feel the situation out first and make sure you’re fairly confident that she wants to be kissed before you actually head in for the smooch.

To find out if she’s really ready for you to make the next move, get in your girl’s space while flirting. Move in closer to your girl and touch your lady’s hand or arm softly. How does she respond? If she seems to like it, that’s your cue to continue. Move in closer and closer, touching your girl’s arm and then moving to brush the hair out of her face and touch her cheek softly. If you get a good response to all of these maneuvers, you can be pretty confident that she’s ready for a kiss.

Knowing When She Doesn’t Want To Be Kissed

Making a kiss absolutely perfect is all about having the right timing. Timing is everything when it comes to seducing a woman. You don’t want to do it when she’s not responding well to your advances, because that usually means that  she’s just not in the mood. That’s the whole purpose of feeling your woman out to begin with – because if she’s not into what you’re doing, it’s better if you stop and simply try again another time.

If she doesn’t seem into it, it doesn’t mean that she’s not into YOU – in fact, quite the opposite may be true. If she doesn’t want you to make a move now, she may still be into it later. Pay attention to your girl’s body language and cues. She’ll let you know when she’s ready.

Start Slowly And Gently

If she seems ready for kissing, it’s important that you start slowly and gently, and work your way into building it up into something more passionate. You don’t want to start off with tongue right away – even if she’s ready for a kiss, if you plow into your woman with your mouth right off the bat, you’re going to turn her off immediately and probably cause her to shut down for the rest of the night.

Pay attention to the kissing tips you’ve heard before and be aware of introducing tongue too early or using too much tongue. Some girls don’t even like tongue during kissing, so make sure you’re paying attention to your girl’s responses to each move that you make. If she backs off a little or seems uninterested in what you’re doing, switch it up and do something a little different. Backtrack a little and start kissing more softly if you were escalating too fast.

Slowly Escalate To More Passionate Kissing

If she seems into what you’re doing, that’s your cue to take it to the next level. Just like how foreplay is important for sex, slowly building up the kiss is important when you’re making out with a woman. If she keeps responding to your advances though, you know that you’re okay to kick it up a notch.

Start slowly bringing your hands up to cradle your lady’s face or place them on her hips to draw her body close to you. Gently move your lips down to the chin and lightly kiss your girl’s neck. You can also gently nibble the ear before moving up to put your lips on hers again. If you’re moving at the right pace, you might end up seducing your girl into having sex with you! However, if you go too fast, you’re bound to turn your woman off before you can even understand what happened.

Always Start From Scratch

Each time you go to kiss a woman – even if you’ve done it hundreds of times before – you want to start from scratch. Don’t assume that because you guys had an intense make out session last week that you can jump right back in where you left off. Even in long term relationships, you want to approach a girl like you’ve never kissed her before and take steps to make sure that she is ready.

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Saying Something Is Better Than Saying Nothing At All

You may have the perfect pick up line in your head, but if you never actually start a conversation with a woman, your pick up lines are going to get you nowhere fast. Even if you flub your “lines” or don’t end up saying the right thing, opening your mouth and putting yourself out there will get you farther with a woman than standing silently on the sidelines.

Find out if you and the girl you’re interested in have something in common. It’s easier to strike up a conversation with someone if you both have something in common – so ask a woman what she likes and find out if you have any similar interests. As you begin talking about things that you like, don’t like and enjoy doing, you’ll start getting to know each other – which opens the door to the next step.

Always Stay True To Yourself

Many guys are tempted to try to be the guy they “think” a woman wants when they start flirting. However, this can end up backfiring on you fast because it won’t take long for a woman to realize that you’re being wishy washy about your interests and you’re not really being yourself.

Learn to like yourself for who you are and learn to be confident in your own skin. Take that confidence with you when you introduce yourself to a woman, and don’t be afraid to put the real you out there. Don’t fake your interests because you think she’ll like you better that way. Be like a rock in what you like and what you don’t like – because let’s face it – if she doesn’t like you for who you really are, do you really want to be with her anyways?

Have Fun With Her

Women remember how they feel during an encounter with a guy much more than they remember what was said or what actually happened. Any time you’re with a girl, make her feel amazing! Make her laugh, pay compliments and make her feel like she’s the only woman in the room.

If you get to go on a date with a woman, make sure you have lots of fun things planned in advance. Don’t just take a woman to dinner and a movie – that’s okay, but it’s not going to evoke any new emotions and make you stand apart from every other guy that’s ever taken her out to dinner and a movie. Instead, take your woman on adventurous dates such as hiking or bike riding. Make sure she feels excited when she’s with you and that things are unpredictable and fun!

As you get to know a girl, start encouraging her to reach the goals she has in life. Be there for your woman and be supportive of what she wants to do and where she wants to go in life. Show a woman that what is important to her is important to you too.

Have No Fear

When dating, you really have to be willing to take a risk and put yourself out there. You’ll find that the more willing you are to take risks and approach women and start conversations with them, the more women will actually be interested in you. Guys who are scared or fake it don’t end up with many women – or any at all!

Quit waiting for the right time to go up to a woman, or the right situation to come out of your shell. You’re never going to find the perfect “time” or the perfect “situation” to ask a girl out. If you’re waiting for everything to be perfect, that time will never come. Instead, just go for it! Go up to a woman and start talking. You may not get a good response every single time you do, but you’re never going to get anywhere at all if you don’t actually start doing it!

Be strong, confident and put the real you out there. When you take a risk and make yourself vulnerable by being yourself, women will notice. Don’t be afraid to go up to them and start a conversation – when take that first step, you’ll find that it’s easy to get a girl to become infatuated with you!

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My man and I have been together a couple of years. Chemistry and sex are great, but where’s the foreplay? The anticipation is the best part for me. But now we just go at it. Can I get it back?

What She Said:

I have good news – it is possible! All it takes is a little communication and compromise with your partner. You two are, of course, more familiar with each other now than at the beginning of your relationship. That means you’ll never quite be able to recapture that thrill of the new because it’s morphed into something different. Still more good news – that something different is an intimacy and trust that you didn’t have before.

Just Because You’re Comfortable Doesn’t Mean Sex Has To Be Boring

Familiarity doesn’t have to equal boring. Luckily you’re already ahead of the curve with the great chemistry and hot sex that you share. All you need to reintroduce into this mix is the anticipation. How do you accomplish this? Here’s where the communication and compromise comes in. Let your boyfriend know you’re hot for him – but that it could get even hotter. That will get his attention!

The Importance Of Date Nights

Add date nights that don’t end in full intercourse to your repertoire. Go out for a great dinner, fondle each other at the movies and dry hump on the couch like you were teenagers – but DON’T have sex. Tease each other with texts and flirty emails throughout the week prior to your big evening out. Make it a game to let the tension build. Do this until you both agree it’s time for release. Repeat.

Now you’ve got the best of both worlds: all the benefits of a long-term relationship with the ability to anticipate hot times of fun and frolic. Enjoy!

What He Said:

Important thing to note:

Men like to be pleased, women like to be teased.

If both sides dig in and insist on only getting what they want, nobody wins. Needless to say your man’s not probably going to be super thrilled about the no intercourse thing. Talk to him and come to some sort of understanding where you get what you want and he does to. For my money, there is no relationship problem that can’t be solved with hotel/vacation sex.

Why Hotel/Vacation Sex Can Help

Something about being out of your usual environment gets people going. Try taking a little weekend getaway. You don’t even have to leave your own town, just be somewhere different. If you’re in the same environment you can develop a pattern, and you’re trying to change the pattern. So come up with fun and naughty ways to disrupt it and then install a new one. It make take practice, but is that a bad thing?

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Pay Attention To What Your Body Language Says To Girls

When a girl approaches you or you approach her, she’s going to size you up in about five seconds. She’s going to make a judgement about you based on several things, including the way you look, the way you dress and even how you smell. Your body language plays an important part in attracting women, because this is what will make you seem approachable to her or not. Subconsciously, she’s reading your body language to know if it’s okay to go up and talk to you or not.

Make sure that your body language communicates that you’re a strong, confident man, who is also friendly and fun to hang out with. When you’re flirting with a woman, you want to make a lot of strong, masculine gestures and also make sure that you’re not stooping over – if you have poor posture, you’re not going to look confident at all. Make sure your facial expressions convey a happy, confident and fun to be around personality – if you’re scowling the whole time, no girl is going to want to approach you or carry on a conversation with you.

Have Friends That Are Also Confident And Fun To Be Around

Who your friends are and who is in your social circle really says a lot about you, especially to a woman. When choosing friends, know that your friends really show who you are, so you want to make sure that you and your friends have similar ideals. If you’re hanging around a bunch of bullies or jerks, girls are going to think that you’re a bully or a jerk, even if you’re not. Your friends should be just as nice and friendly to others as you are.

Learn To Love Yourself

Women want to be dating confident men – they don’t want to be dating a wuss. So you want to project an air of self confidence and to do that, you must truly learn to love yourself for who you really are. Know that each person is special and unique (including you) and each person has something they can offer other people that no one else can. Each person is an individual and no two people are exactly alike. Learn to love yourself and be confident in what YOU can offer, because it’s special!

How To Break The Ice

You’ve got the first five seconds down, but now you actually have to talk to her! What do you talk to her about? How can you break the ice without choking up?

Start flirting with her. Engage her in conversation. Start by asking her questions. Don’t just ask questions like, “What do you think about the crazy weather we’ve been having lately?” That’s lame. Ask her intellectual questions about her, things around you or things that matter to her. For example, ask her what she is passionate about. No, not what her hobbies are or what sports she plays. Ask her questions that really make her think, like, “What is it that makes you want to wake up every morning?”

Talk About Your Passions

While you definitely want to break the ice by asking her about her passions first, there’s probably going to be an opening at some point for you to talk about what drives you. Be honest with her and let her know what you truly love and what really makes you tick. Hopefully, you and her share some of the same passions or at least ones that are similar so you can start building some common ground, which is essential when you start dating someone.

However, you’re never going to know if you and a girl would really hit it off unless you’re completely honest about your passions and what you love, even though it makes you more vulnerable to rejection. When it comes to dating, women know that a man is risking rejection each time he is flirting with a girl or asks a woman out. You can really make a difference by revealing yourself to a girl, instead of trying to be the guy you think she wants.

Stay Positive

Girls always remember how they feel when they meet a guy. She may not remember exactly what he looks like or exactly what he said, but if he made her feel great, she’s going to remember him and either be waiting for his call or be dialing his digits herself. If a guy makes her feel amazing, she’s definitely going to want to be dating him.

If you make women feel great when they’re around you, they’re going to remember you and want to hang out with you even more. If you’re a downer while they’re around, or if you’re pessimistic or constantly complaining about things, a woman is going to want to run for the hills at the first chance she gets. Even if you’re nervous, focus on flirting with her and making her laugh. Smile, relax and remember to have fun. Show her a good time and make her feel like she’s the only girl in the room. If you do, it’s pretty much guaranteed that you’ll score a date with her.

You’ve Got To Do More Than Talk

While you may be able to talk a good game, that’s not the only thing you have to do if you want to keep women you want to be dating coming back to you for more. Use body language and gestures to show a woman that you’re really interested in her. For example, you can look in her eyes just a few seconds longer than is comfortable and touch her arm while she’s talking to you or you’re talking to her.

If things are going really well between you and a girl, don’t be afraid to take it a step further. If you and her seem to be really hitting it off, don’t be afraid to take a risk and go in for a kiss. Even if you get rejected 10 times out of 11, all that really mattered was that you got 1 “Yes!”

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Bringing Up The Topic Of Sex Is Risky Business

If you’re nervous about bringing up the topic of sex to a woman – even if you’ve been seeing her for awhile – you have good reason to be. There are many women that will be offended by the discussion of sex, no matter how polite or discreet you are about it.

Every woman will react differently to the topic of sex and the same woman may react in different ways to the same topic, depending on her mood. When talking about sex with a woman, you’re liable to strike out at any moment – but approaching it the right way can make all the difference.

The Indirect Approach

Probably the easiest and most friendly way to bring up the topic of sex with a girl is indirectly. Start talking about sex in a way that doesn’t directly involve you or her. For example, you’re definitely going to get shot down if you start talking about what kind of sex positions she likes. However, if you bring up the topic in an indirect way, such as telling a funny story about sex positions gone wrong, she’s more likely to laugh with you and open up to the idea of talking about sex with you.

Make sure that when using the indirect approach, you keep everything about other people in other situations. Don’t directly reference you or her, and definitely not you and her together. If you start talking about what “she” likes or what “you” want, you’re going to scare her off instantly.

Start Learning About Sex

For a girl to be comfortable talking about sex with you, you’ve got to be comfortable with the idea of sex yourself first. If a little dirty talk makes you blush or stutter, you’re not going to convince any girl to carry on a conversation with you like that. It can be difficult if you come from a conservative family, however, the more you learn about sex the more you will be able to talk about it smoothly and confidently. Read a sex advice column, or check out some online resources for sex tips and sex advice.

Pay Attention To Her Response

One thing that a lot of guys miss when having a conversation of this nature is reading a woman’s cues and knowing when it’s gone too far – and when to stop. There are many cues a woman will give you to let you know that now is not the right time to talk about this and she’s not into what you’re saying. If she’s exhibiting these signs during the conversation and you press the issue, you may end up turning her off for good.

• Turning or looking away from you.
• Acting embarrassed or blushing.
• Stuttering her responses or acting nervous in general.
• Short responses or refusal to answer any questions
• Trying to change the topic

If She Engages You

If you’ve stayed confident and cool, made her laugh and created a little bit of playful sexual tension, she might end up engaging you in the conversation about sex and even contribute to it, taking things further. If she does engage in the conversation with you, you know that you can take it to the next level and start talking about things that have more to do with you and her. Signs that she’s into it are:

• Making eye contact with you or looking at her lips
• Laughing at your jokes
• Joking with you, cracking jokes of her own
• Touching you or accidentally brushing up against you
• Standing close to you

Building Sexual Tension

If she seems responsive to talking about sex at first, it’s up to you to create sexual tension between you and her. This is what will ultimately lead to actually getting to have sex with her! The best sex advice to get a woman into bed is to always leave her guessing and keep a flirty element of mystery about you. When revealing information about yourself, don’t give away too much at once. Let her wonder a little bit and allow her imagination to go wild.

Being Sexually Confident

Girls are naturally attracted to sexually confident guys. They’re not attracted to wimpy looking guys that don’t look like they’re secure in themselves at all – so to even get her to want to talk to you, you’ve got to exude an air of self confidence and friendliness. However, you must remember that sexual confidence can go too far and suddenly become creepy and obsessive. Make sure that your sexual confidence doesn’t border on the strange side. You definitely don’t want to come across as just another horny guy looking to score – because this will turn her off immediately.

Relax And Have Fun

Remember that dating and talking to women is all about having fun and getting to know people. If you’re too uptight, worried or nervous about talking to women about sex, you’re not going to get very far. Relax, be yourself and focus on having a good time and making sure others have a good time as well. If you get your date laughing, talking and having fun, she’ll become more and more relaxed around you – giving you the opportunity to bring up the topic of sex without her shying away.

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Cook With Cloves

Cloves have long been known to be an aphrodisiac for both men and women, but they get a lot less press than other aphrodisiacs such as oysters or ginseng and ginkgo biloba. One woman who ate a clove soup with her man ended up having sex with her man all night – and it happened again the next time she made the soup! Cooking with cloves can definitely revv up your lover’s libido and have him craving sex – and it will work for you too! Next time you make dinner, find a recipe that has cloves in it, such as a ham baked with cloves or a clove flavored Bundt cake.

Be A “Damsel In Distress”

Men love to rescue women – it’s hard wired into their DNA to do it. Does this mean you have to completely give up your female independence to make him feel like the Alpha male though? Of course not. However, playing a “damsel in distress” every now in then will be all you need to get your partner wanting to lift your skirt up and bend you over.

Next time you want to get it on with your lover, have him come over and fix something for you or lift something really, really heavy that you just can’t manage to lift by yourself. Whatever you ask him to do, make sure it’s something really manly that you couldn’t possibly do on your own. Bonus points if he comes over to do his job and you’re wearing skimpy lingerie. He’ll definitely get the idea then!

Play A Little Hard To Get

Men also love the chase – it’s part of the reason they really don’t like clingy women. Men want to be with a woman who is confident enough not to NEED him too much or smother him with affection. Use this tactic to your advantage by playing a little hard to get. Flirting is probably the best way to do this. Flirt with your partner unabashedly – tease him, banter with him and let him get a glimpse of your ass in a tight pair of jeans as you walk away. It won’t be long before he’s tearing your jeans off and initiating a night full of passion.

Dress Up

You don’t necessarily have to dress up to get your partner to start thinking about sex, but take some time to make sure you look good. Often, women get comfortable in relationships and don’t do their makeup as often or worry about what their wearing. Usually, this isn’t a problem because men love to see their women in a pair of pajama pants that make your butt look good.

However, sometimes women get too comfortable and a guy’s “sex mechanism” doesn’t get turned on or want to have sex as much – because you’re not looking sexy, you’re not feeling sexy. And he can pick up on that. So go get a pedicure, a manicure, a wax job and buy a new bra and panty set. Do your hair and makeup, even if you’re just hanging out around the house. If you’re confident and looking hot, he’ll want to jump your bones ASAP.

Make Out

Another thing that couples forget about when they’ve been in a relationship for awhile is how much fun just kissing can be! Remember when you first got together with your current partner and you spent hours just kissing without worrying about when you were going to have sex or even what you were going to do next? There’s really something about making out with your partner – without thinking about sex – that makes sex even hotter when you finally do head to the bedroom!

Next time you and your lover are hanging out on the couch and watching a movie, lean over and start kissing his neck softly. Move up to his lips and kiss him deeply. If he starts to move his hands to start taking off your clothes, stop him. Use your lips to show him that you just want to kiss – for now. After you’ve teased him enough with your lips, then you can let him take it further.

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At A Loss For Words?

So say you mustered up the courage to go and approach a girl you find attractive, and she responded well and is engaged in conversation with you, but then all of a sudden you find yourself at a loss for words, and now you are digging for any topic that may keep conversation going. This is a common problem with many men when interacting with women but by simply changing the way you view the interaction can bring your conversation skills through the roof.

Have A Genuine Interest In Her

The number one important thing to finding what to discuss is actually having a genuine interest in the girl you are conversing with. When people try to improve their abilities to converse with and attract the opposite sex, they seem to view many conversations as “practice” and just being able to hold a conversation for an extended period of time becomes the goal at had.

You need to remove yourself from this mindset and make sure your focus is in the right place. If you are focusing on what to say next, there is a good chance you are not listening to or taking in what the girl has to say. Instead always keep your focus on the girl and keep the mindset that you WANT to find more about this person. Every girl you converse with should spark intrigue in you, this will make you ask genuine questions hat lead to genuine answers.

Find Common Ground First

To establish a strong string of conversation, there are two ways you should view the way the conversation you are having. First off, your number one goal with all of this is to find a commonality between the two of you, that is when natural conversation emerges, when you are both discussing something similar you share. The best way to do this is by asking questions that appeal to the girl on an emotional level.

Really Get To Know Her

Instead of just asking one generic question after the other, dig deeper because you actually care to get to know this girl. Ask questions that ask how she feels about that subject, or why she associates with it, or how she plans on engaging what you are discussing. It is like being a good sports reporter. You will never hear the reporter ask simply what the athlete did to score the touchdown, instead they ask how the athlete feels after scoring it. All questions you ask should come from your own expressive curiosity in the girl, only ask things you actually care about.

Listen To What She Is Saying

Next, when the girl is responding to your questions, you want to be listening with an active appreciation for what she is saying. Be happy that this girl is taking the time to open up to you and listen to everything she is saying. Do not worry about what to say next but simply take in her response, if you have gotten her on a semi-emotional level, you will naturally want to respond by opening up about something in your life, which becomes the basis for your first commonality/connection, making the rest of the conversation go very smoothly.

Once You’ve Achieved An Emotional Connection

You have the opportunity to create a connection because you have gotten her on the emotional level, there are so many ways to respond once the girl reaches this state of conversation. For example you could discuss where you lived when you were young, your experiences at the beach, or your favorite childhood memory. Just remember to open up on an emotional conversational level after the girl does and a strong bond will be made, cementing your first conversation on a level like no other.

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Though it can feel awkward outright requesting someone’s phone number, you’ll have to find a way to ask for it before your initial meeting is over. A little tact and flirting can go a long way in helping you get that all-important information.

How To Get Their Contact Information

Say you’re out at a party making conversation with a guy or girl who has managed to get your attention. The night is winding down, and you know that you want to see this intriguing individual again. What’s the best way to get their contact information? There are a few different approaches. Simple honesty may be the best. As it’s time to say goodbye, matter-of-factly state that you’re so glad you met, you had a wonderful time talking during the party, and you’d like to see him/her again.

Then ask for a phone number or, at the very least, their email. You can always email them for their number later. If you’re not up to explaining your motives so plainly, mention an upcoming party or group event you’d like to invite them to, and request their number or email so you can send them more information about it. Of course, you’ll have to actually bring them to the event you reference, but that doesn’t mean you can’t call and ask them on a date before then.

Use Social Networking To Your Advantage

If asking for a phone number or email address makes you too nervous, or if you forget to ask while you’re at the party, social networking can save you. It’s not exactly the most impressive way to contact someone, but if you can find them on Facebook or Myspace, you can friend them. Then you can ask for their number in a message. Make a witty remark when you send that message, mentioning that you meant to ask for their number that night, but were so caught up in your great conversation that you forgot to.

A little flattery will get you somewhere, and jokingly acknowledging that you should’ve asked in person helps, too. Another option that will keep you from having to ask is even simpler. While at the party, offer your own number. If you hand over your phone number, the person you’re speaking with is likely to offer you theirs in return, no asking required.

What Not To Do

All of these methods are good, but what should you avoid doing when attempting to get a phone number? Cheesy pick up lines only work if you’re joking, and he or she knows it. Unless you know you’re being so obviously funny that you won’t offend, sleazy lines will ensure you strike out.

Never just walk up to a person, tell them you think they’re cute, and ask for their digits. Have an actual conversation first, and you’re more likely to be taken seriously when the time comes to get his/her number. Most importantly, don’t let on that you’re nervous. This isn’t a wedding proposal—you’re just asking for a phone number! Keep that in mind, remain calm and confident, and you’ll be calling each other in no time.

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So maybe you are out running an every day errand, maybe you are getting some drinks at a bar or club, either way, all you know is that you are going a long with your business and like a fly to a neon light, you see some girl that completely captures your attention. All you want is to be able to go up and talk to her, flirt with her, sweep her off her feet, and walk out with her.

However for some, this task simply remains an idea while they sit idly and watch the girl they admire walk away, many times to never be seen again. Well if one can apply the simple concepts presented in this article, difficulty making an introduction will become a thing of the past.

She Probably Won’t Introduce Herself To You

First thing you need to understand is that the girl will almost never make an introduction on you, per say. What I mean is that it is extremely rare that any girl will go out of her way, go up to you, and initiate the conversation, I don’t care how good looking you are, it almost never happens so get that idea out of your head and never wait around for it. Girls do however go out of their way to make themselves readily available for your introduction.

This is because it is your job, as the man, to go up, pick the girl you want, and initiate the conversation. It is your right as a man; never forget this. There is nothing socially wrong with it, if anything it is expected of you.

So the key to a successful first introduction is identifying what kind of girls want to be approached. Often times, it goes wrong for a guy it is because they are waiting around too long, missing opportunities the girl presents, or simply introduce yourself girls that are not currently open to flirting. So the step is identifying the two major things that a girl will do to open herself to your introduction.

How She Will Open Herself Up To You

Eye Contact

This is by far the most important window that a girl can present to you for you to open. Think about what its like when you walk through a busy street. As you walk on your way, there are naturally people that just catch your eye, sometimes it is a pretty girl, other times it is just someone in your vicinity, point is subconsciously your mind works to make yourself aware of your surroundings. We do this by making brief eye contact with the people around us and girls do the same exact thing.

If you are out and about and you happen to notice a girl look in your direction and you make eye contact with her, even for just a brief second, consider that your push in the butt to go up and talk to her. Because she has recognized you in her surroundings/subconscious, she will not be startled and taken aback by your introduction, in fact about 80% of the time girls make eye contact with a guy is because they found something about them attractive in one way. Think of it like an 80% chance that the dating will go well.

Proximity

Meaning that the girl is in your vicinity. Think of it like this, you are at bar or club and you see a girl you like within her group of friends. Her actions may show that she is in fact very open to being approached, regardless if they are on purpose or subconscious. If you notice the girl standing within a 10 foot radius of yourself for more than 3 mins, she has processed you in her surroundings and will be much more susceptible to an introduction. If you notice her walking by you on more than one occasion, you sure as hell better make an introduction. And lastly if you are noticing her facing you within her group or wherever she may be, she is opening herself to be approached by you.

Combining eye contact and proximity will make the dating go smoothly, especially if you can combine it with this very simple formula for introducing yourself to a girl you find attractive.

Now what I am about to share may sound like a pick up line to some but it should not be viewed like that. It should be viewed as a natural response to a women you find attractive. Although sometimes there are opportunities where something clever and situational can be made into an introduction, it is much simpler to have a natural response to women you find attractive so you don’t over think anything.

Foolproof Introduction To An Attractive Girl

Walk over. Stop. Make eye contact and say:

“Hey I know this seems random but I think you are really cute and I wanted to come over and introduce myself, my name is ______”

Then stick your hand out for a handshake.

This direct introduction works because it allows her to see your intentions from the start, showing you have a general interest in her, if she engages in the conversation, then she is accepting your interest and you already know from the start it is on. Also by putting your hand out and introducing yourself, it allows for her to accept your introduction and be open to a conversation cause you are just being friendly. It is a natural response to shake hands and introduce yourself to someone you just met so by encouraging her to do so after your introduction.

By saying “I know this seems random” in the beginning, you are also addressing the only real objection a girl has to a stranger approaching them, having it be random, so by saying it you take that fear away. Also if you had got eye contact with her or it had her in your proximity, your introduction will be anything but random.

If you can make this style of introduction your go to move when you have nothing clever to say or are otherwise at a loss for words, you will find that even the most attractive girls open up because you are showing social awareness and genuine interest.

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Should She Ask Him Out?

If you’re the lady in the equation, it’s important to figure out what kind of guy you’re dealing with. If he’s a confident guy and is showing obvious interest in you, there’s a good chance he’ll do the asking. Of course, his big personality may attract lots of women, so he may be used to being hotly pursued.

If he seems like the life of the party, you can actually go either way. You can rest assured that he’s accustomed to women asking him out, so he won’t be bothered by you making the move. On the other hand, playing hard to get and making him do some of the work might actually pay off more for you. Men who are used to being chased after are often more intrigued by the women that make them do the chasing.

How To Do It

If you follow the latter option, make sure to flirt it up and make your affection for him just obvious enough that he knows you’re interested.Then sit back and wait for him to come to you. If you find yourself interested in a shy type, you’re most likely going to have to ask him out. This is especially true if you’re not shy yourself, as your overt confidence may be slightly intimidating to a shy guy. If you yourself are also shy or simply don’t believe in making the first move, take heart.

The best way to ask him out without really doing so is getting a friend to intervene. Have a mutual friend let him know that you’re interested in a seemingly uncontrived way. That should be all the confidence boosting he’ll need to make a move on you.

Should He Ask Her Out?

What if you’re the guy in the scenario? Guys can always feel comfortable with making the first move. Even if the woman you ask is used to asking guys out first, she won’t be put off by you beating her to the punch. Luckily for them, men have never had to worry about the unfortunate stigma of seeming desperate if they pursue someone.

Some women still fear that stigma though, so you can make it easier on her and ask a girl out. The modern man does need to worry about becoming too complacent, though. If you’re the type of guy that gets asked out all the time, be careful not to get too comfortable with it.

If you assume that you should let the ladies do all the work, you may miss out on some great catches. There are plenty of wonderful women out there who might be a little shy, a tad old fashioned, or just prefer to feel sought after. Even if you’re a lady magnet, you should take a chance now and again and ask out a girl you’re into.

On the flip side, even if you’re an old fashioned guy and prefer to do the asking, don’t shy away from a woman who’s bold enough to ask you out. In the current dating scene, a woman can make the first move without being a generally pushy person.

Be True To Yourself

Finally, whether you’re a boy or a girl, remain true to your own style. If you really don’t feel comfortable asking someone out, then don’t. That just means that you need to be pursued by someone to be happy, so you probably won’t enjoy dating a person whom you had to make the first move with anyway. Odds are good they’ll keep expecting you to take the lead throughout the relationship, which is probably not your thing.

More importantly, so much of the early dating process is about being in the moment. Trust your gut! If you feel like doing the asking, go for it. The worst thing that can happen is that the guy or gal you ask will say no. That just means it probably wasn’t meant to be to begin with. The truth is that there are no hard and fast rules when it comes to approaching a potential date.

If you can get a feel for the person you’re interested in and go with what’s comfortable for you, you’ll make the right decision every time.

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I have a question about dealing with rumors: I met a girl through mutual friends and we instantly hit it off. We’ve been hanging out a lot and now our mutual friends are starting to thing her and I are secretly dating. The problem is, both of us ONLY want to be friends and now these rumors are starting to impact our friendship. We’ve confronted our friends, but they’re not buying it. Any suggestions?

–YouTube Viewer

People Love Good Gossip

People really enjoy a good rumor – to the point where some people may make them up just for their own entertainment. This usually causes drama, which most people enjoy watching – but of course, they don’t want to be involved. Consider the possibility that someone started the gossip intentionally to create drama. Also consider the possibility that it was simply your friends misinterpreting what is really going on in the situation.

Even if someone didn’t start the gossip about you and your friend supposedly dating on purpose, it can still affect you deeply. It can affect your relationships with others, including keeping people who might want to date you from actually asking you out because they heard you were dating someone else. It can also impact the friendship you have with this special person. You may be tempted to end the friendship just to get others to stop thinking you’re dating.

How Rumors Get Spread

Gossip is easy to spread, but difficult to get rid of. If your friend tells you something and you repeat that to someone else, you’ve participated in gossip right there. Because what will happen, is you will get the story twisted just a little bit. Even if you didn’t mean to, you’re going to leave the person you told with a slightly different impression of what your friend actually told you. Once that person tells someone and they tell someone and so on and so on, the idea of what happened is not even close to what actually happened.

Did Your Friends Pick Up On Your Chemistry?

Your friends may have not intended to start gossip at all – in fact, they may have simply noticed that you and your special friend have great chemistry together. Maybe they saw you flirting with each other or just having a great time hanging out together and saw it for what it really was – two great friends with the possibility of something more. Just because you weren’t dating this person at the time the gossip got started, doesn’t mean that there isn’t something there between you two that could evolve into something more. Consider the possibility that your friends picked up on a connection between you two that you have been in the dark about.

Jealousy Can Fuel Gossip

Jealousy is a huge instigator of gossip. People who are feeling jealous may start hearsay just to get under your skin. Perhaps your friends or their friends are jealous because you both have been neglecting your individual friends to hang out together. Another possibility is that a particular friend started the rumor because they wanted to date you – and are upset that you’re spending so much time with this new friend than them. The same applies to your new friend – perhaps one of their friends wanted to date them and are jealous of how much time they’re spending with you.

Let Go Of The Hearsay

Hearsay is just that – hearsay. There’s no reason to hold on to the gossip, because it’s not doing you any good. In fact, it’s probably doing more harm to obsess over what is being said about you and your new friend than it would be to let it go. So just let it go. Learn to disregard what people way about you and your new friendship with this person and just live your live the way you want to. Do what makes you happy and let people say whatever they’re going to say. Remember the saying, “This too shall pass.” The rumors about you dating your new friend will go away eventually and you’ll be left with a great friendship afterwards.

Decide Not To Let It Affect You

The only way that gossip like that will affect you and your new friendship is if you let it. If you let what the other people are saying affect you, it could possibly destroy the relationship. Communicate with your friend and decide together that you’re not going to let the rumors affect what you have together. Also, if you believe your friends are the start of the gossip, have the confidence to let them know that you don’t appreciate them. Let them know the truth and ask them to stop spreading rumors about you. If you’ve asked them once, ask them again. If they’re really your friends, they’ll respect you and stop talking about you behind your back.

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Do you think girls frequently expose their breasts on purpose? How often do girls show it intentionally, or is it usually inadvertently?

–YouTube Viewer

It Depends On A Woman’s Mood

Whether a woman shows her breasts or not depends entirely on what mood she’s in. In fact, pretty much everything a woman does depends on what mood she’s in! Perhaps she’s dating around and feeling like flirting a little – she is probably going to be more inclined to show her breasts off in a low cut shirt. If she is not feeling as sexy, she will probably wear a shirt that doesn’t show as much.

However, if a woman’s breasts are showing, don’t assume that it is because she wanted it to.  It could possibly be unintentional as well. She may not have given it any thought at all – certainly not as much thought as many men do. Most ladies are very much into fashion and style – that’s a no brainer. So a woman might wear a shirt that is low cut and shows the tops of a her breasts simply because she likes the shirt, or it might go really well with an outfit or a favorite piece of jewelry.

Men Want To See Breasts

Girls know from experience in the dating field that men respond very well to short shorts and a little boob action. If a woman is trying to get a date, she might wear a lower cut shirt in the hopes that a guy will notice her and come up and introduce himself to her and possibly ask her out. There’s a reason that Victoria’s Secret push up bras are so popular! Chances are, if men responded as well to a long sleeve turtleneck as they did a deep v-neck top, turtlenecks would be the new “in fashion” item!

The same goes for lingerie. Lingerie wasn’t designed because ladies enjoy walking around in garter belts and crotchless panties. It’s almost never something a woman gets for herself if she doesn’t have a man who will get to see it on her. It was designed with men in mind. Men love to see girls’ bodies and lingerie was created to accent and show off certain parts of girls’ bodies that guys find attractive!

It Might Just Be Hot Out

Another reason a woman might be showing her breasts accidentally is if she’s wearing a low cut shirt or tank top because it’s hot out. Just like men take their shirts completely off or wear a tank top or thin shirt sometimes if it’s very warm out, a woman might wear a shirt that has a little less to it for comfort reasons or because she wants to get a little sun.

Also, ladies that have very large breasts get warmer up there more quickly than ladies with smaller breasts. It can get a little damp and sweaty up there if a woman has larger breasts, which can be extremely uncomfortable and even cause rashes or chafing. So it makes sense that wearing a low cut shirt would help keep a woman more cool and comfortable during the warmer months.

Are There Girls That Use Their Breasts To Entice And Manipulate Men?

There are girls out there that will use their bodies to their advantage to attract men and make them start thinking about sex from the get go. Whether they’re wearing itty bitty shorts, a low cut shirt, a backless dress or a miniskirt, they’re doing it because they know it will grab a lot of men’s attention and that’s what they’re after. But that doesn’t mean that all girls who expose their breasts are doing it for this particular reason.

While there are a portion of ladies that do expose their breasts intentionally to manipulate men, this number is far lower than the number of men who notice! Men think about it much more than girls do, so chances are, if you’re noticing a woman’s breasts in a low cut shirt, she probably didn’t do it deliberately. She probably has another reason for letting the girls out – like comfort or fashion.

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