Ask Dan and Jennifer » how to dress

Men, What Does Your Style Say About You? (Part II)

Kinowear — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 17:20:52 +0000

The majority of men today will put little effort into outward appearance, and then question why women aren’t giving them more attention. What they may not know is that it just takes a little style.

We all want to look better.

The fact is that we all want to look better, feel better, and be more attractive to the opposite sex, but it’s just not in our culture as men to talk about our appearances.

Women talk about this stuff all the time. Women trade fashion tips and tell each other whose butt looks fat in what. It’s just part of their culture, and these are things that they’re comfortable – and engaged in – discussing. It’s just not a part of conversation that men really have, it’s always been sort of a taboo amongst men.

The American workplace has also become so casual, everyone is dressing down now.

We don’t have fathers giving us style advice anymore. If you do, consider yourself lucky. The majority of us are lost and bewildered.

With nobody to turn to, men are wandering in the desert by themselves, desperately searching for the door that leads to sartorial wisdom. Inherently, we all know that the way we look matters, but nobody is out there guiding us in the right direction.

As men, especially, we need direction. There was a study done where researchers discovered that by placing a small picture of a fly in public bathroom urinals, there was less spillage. We men need something to aim at.

This means that before you go shopping, you must have a plan. Make a list of things you want to purchase next time you hit the stores. When something catches your eye online or in a magazine, add the item to your list.

This will prevent you from aimlessly walking around and merely perusing through each store; wasting time and ending up purchasing something you didn’t want because salesgirl said it was "so you."

With a specific plan in your mind, now you’re at the store with a mission. You go in, get what you need, and you get out. The man’s way.

The best way to start learning the language of style is by looking at those who know it and begin emulating them.

So surround yourself with style savvy friends or fashion magazines, and make mental notes of what makes them look good. When you see great outfits in fashion magazines, cut them out and save the pages, take note of what is worn and how the outfit is put together. After all, the models are dressed by stylists.

When you’re out shopping, and you happen to see some other interesting items, try it on. This is a simple concept that most men don’t ever bother to implement. The only way to truly expand your style and find what you like is to try it on first. Something you judge won’t work for you at first glance may change entirely once you put it on.

Make sure an item you try on makes you feel good.

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Men, What Does Your Style Say About You? (Part 1)

Kinowear — Fri, 21 Mar 2008 13:32:09 +0000

“It’s all about personality man… women don’t care what you look like.”

Is it? Or is this another feel-good rationalization that will sabotage men for generations to come…

Some men seem to think that style is nothing but superficial beautification. Others seem to fall into the other extreme of thinking image is everything—that it defines them.

Style is a language.

It is a mode of communication.

To say that style is just beautification of the superficial is like saying words are just the decoration of pages. On the other hand, our style is not our identity.

The relationship can be best seen in the way a word defines the associated object/concept. The word is never truly equivalent to the object. It is just a representation, a communication of it.

Michel Foucault: “This is not a pipe” (It’s only a picture of a pipe)

Like the English language, there are always better ways to express the same message.

It’s like describing yourself as "happy" vs. "first-paycheck-meets-last-day-of-high school joyful." Some styles just get the message across better. Others are just antonyms. There are many men out there dressing in the antonyms of their desired selves.

The crazy thing about the language of style is that it communicates whether you are aware of it or not.

Every single piece of clothing you put on is saying something about you. You might be putting on your "favorite" business casual outfit thinking your communicating "cultured," "modern," and "seasoned professional," but you may actually be sending the message of "out-of-sync," "antiquated," and "amateur."

How many judgments and presumptions can you make about the guy in the above picture?

I bet you can write a paragraph about the dude’s life, including what his love life must be like, etc. You are conscious of this judgment making process now, but most of the time you are doing this unconsciously, labeling people, and making sweeping generalizations.

If you’re guilty of this, just imagine how others must be doing the same to you.

You see, the human mind is always trying to MAKE SENSE of the world.

This often means making assumptions as an attempt to bridge the gap of information that it often experiences. When we see someone we’ve never seen before, the mind will do whatever it can with the information that is presented. That information is often presented in the form of appearance or image.

The common language of style exists whether you decide to acknowledge it or not. With your dress, you’re essentially "speaking" the language of society & culture, and conveying your characteristics through "words" that are commonly understood. Over-sized pants say something. So do red ties on presidents.

"OK, but who cares what others think? Why not just be confident?"

You should care.

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Top Ten Tips For Dressing For Dating Success

Natalie Lue — Tue, 04 Mar 2008 16:37:20 +0000

I’m all for individual style and taste but if you want to ensure that you don’t send the wrong messages, there are some style tips that you can’t afford to miss.

Groom from the inside out

I don’t care how hard you’ve worked, how little time you have, and bla, bla, bla, there is absolutely no excuse for lacking in personal hygiene and grooming. Your date doesn’t think “Oh…poor thing, they’re so busy” they just think “Hmmm, not a great first impression”.

This means that you should be clean smelling (don’t put deodorant or perfume over sweat or other dubious body odors), snowflake free (I know that people have dandruff but you don’t need to wear it like a shawl over your shoulder), teeth brushed, breath checked, and bogeys cleaned out of your nose.

To tan or not to tan

If you want to bronze up for your date, I’d steer clear of looking like an Oompa Loompa. Go for your tan the day before so that you don’t rock up to your date looking like a lobster or being in so much pain from sunburn that you can’t enjoy yourself.

Go easy on the fake tan because unless your date shares the same penchant for looking seriously orange, you’re gonna look dayglo….

Don’t try to kill your date with your perfume/aftershave or clown face

Heaven help your poor date when you douse yourself in so much scent that you can be smelt in outer space. A dash of scent is a lot better than eye wateringly, nose bleeding, brain wrenching levels of scent. If you need to take off your makeup with a trowel, it’s too much! Wear the appropriate amount of makeup for the date

Dress your breasts

I’m pleased that you’re proud of your breasts whether they’re real or fake, but if I had a pound for every woman who ever complained about guys spending half the date staring at their breasts, I’d be sitting back counting my cash instead of writing this.

If you don’t want your breasts to be the focal point don’t make them the center of attention by not leaving very much to the imagination. That doesn’t mean cover up like a nun but if your top is something closer to a nipple cover, or you might as well not have bothered with a top at all, you’re wearing too little!

Make. An. Effort

I don’t mean turn up looking like the dog’s dinner in black tie (unless this is actually the dress code) but if you roll up looking like you literally rolled up, you send a very clear message that you are lazy and that you don’t care about what your date thinks of you. This means wear clean clothes, don’t be full of creases or rumples, and basically look like you tried.

Wear clothes that fit

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