Wondering why you’re still single? Or have you even given up wondering and just accepted being alone? 

Some people enjoy spending some quality, relaxing time by themselves, you know, ‘me time’.

But that’s a very, very different situation from being lonely and alone – not having another person in your life. We’re pack animals and need that human contact, that personal presence, that comforting touch. For most people, being alone is a really depressing reality, and it basically sucks.  

Well, stop it!

Take the ‘Why Am I Single?’ love quiz and maybe you’ll find out what you’re doing wrong. It’s a short, fun love quiz that may well help you find your way, or maybe find where you’re going the wrong way.

The short quiz walks you through some soul searching questions, to see what you’d do in certain romantic (or romantically related) situations. For example, how you would deal with your new love interest inviting you to meet their parents – maybe a little too early in the relationship. What would YOU do? 

One particularly cool feature is that once you take the love quiz you can embed the widget (a link to the quiz) on your blog or MySpace page and it’ll show off your results along with a cutesy note.

Here are our results:

Jennifer – "I believe that any species who can’t work a toilet seat is inferior!"

Dan – "The women, they always escape"

It’s really fun and short (only 7 questions), so check it out at OnlineDating.org and let us know your results.

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3. 10 Tips for Surviving Valentine’s Day Whether You’re Single or Attached
4. Single Mother Raising Boys, Oh, My!
5. Online Dating – How to Avoid the Single Biggest Mistake Most People Make (Video)

How can we escape it, what can we do? The most common response is a search for a companion, for a lover.

“If only I had someone,” we think, “everything will be all right.” Failing in this search, many begin to turn to alcohol, depression, or self-destructive behaviors.

But the search is flawed, self-defeating right from the start. Whatever we do might seem to work for a while, but we are running away from loneliness – and the more we run, the stronger it gets.

Relationships Rooted in Loneliness

Romance that stems from loneliness is fake, a rose made of plastic; all it does is cover up our yearning. This is how many relationships are – two lonely people who are mutually clinging and grasping on to each other. Regardless of what they say or do, each person is really thinking: please take care of my heart.

How do we take care of other hearts when we can’t even nourish our own?

In such relationships, the neediness is still there. Once the honeymoon period is over, the neediness and unhappiness begins to arise again. For no one – no matter how beautiful, handsome, sweet, attentive, and dashing – can fulfill your needs exactly the way you want them to. There’s always something else that will appear – something they haven’t done that you want them to, or they’ve done something you wish they hadn’t.

When that happens, the yearning arises again. In fact, it has always been there, just beneath the surface. But you think it is your partner’s fault, and you begin to blame them – “You were supposed to make me happy!” But how can they? No one can make you happy but you. All they can do is cover the yearning temporarily.

The Repugnance of Desperation

Being in the depths of loneliness makes it harder to find a partner. This neediness can only be hidden for so long, if one manages to hide it at all.

It is common knowledge that desperation is one of the most unattractive traits out there. The more you run after them, try to hang on to them, the more a quality partner will retreat. They have options, people who make them happy instead of wanting to rely on them – why stay with you?

Relax into your Loneliness

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Related articles:

1. Relationship Happiness When The Love Of Your Life Hasn’t Shown Up Yet!
2. Romance For Men: Following The Platinum Rule For A Better Relationship
3. When Fairy Tale Romance Goes Bad…
4. 5 MORE Tips For When You’re Alone And Lonely – Part 2
5. How to Use Modern Technology to Add Old-Fashioned Romance to Your Relationship