How Standing On Your Head Can Improve Your Love Life

Sarah Elizabeth Malinak — Sun, 26 Jul 2009 01:15:45 +0000

This morning I was out in one of our flower beds pulling weeds. I ran across the cover of the septic tank, which brought back memories. A few years ago, we had problems with the septic system when my husband had to be out of town. Handling it myself, I called a septic repairman who was glad for the work. Some restructuring of the tank was necessary, resulting in juniper having to be severely cut and a new and improved cover installed. I like the new cover. Larger and broader, it gives me a ledge from which to work in the bed. You see, we live in the mountains of Western North Carolina where every house, yard, garden, and flower bed is built on the side of a hill.

So, I stood on the septic tank cover this morning, bent at the waste pulling weeds, where for all intents and purposes my upper body was upside down; when suddenly, I had an epiphany about the opposite sex and what makes them happy! It was so brilliant, I’m thinking of making a habit of standing on my head to discover just how much I can see from their perspective.

Letting A Man Do The Work

In order to share the epiphany, I have to divulge a secret. All my married life, I have resented the man in my life needing me to let him do things that I can do for myself. Independent and resourceful, I was born singing the song, “Anything you can do, I can do better! I can do anything better than you!” At the same time, when he’s out of town and I have to handle calling the septic repairman or the electrician or whatever, I resent it that he isn’t available to take care of it for me.

Now before you think, “What a b___!” Hear me out. This is a common phenomenon for women. That means, gentlemen (and the rare lady who hasn’t had this experience) you don’t have to take it personally. Besides, I believe I have discovered how to walk out of the problem.

When I was practically upside down an hour ago with my memories of the septic repair, I got on a feeling level the following words, “They want to help and it makes them happy. What’s the big deal about waiting till he’s around to ask for his help, when something that simple makes him so happy? Does anything short of a real emergency really need to be done immediately by me alone when inviting him into the solution of whatever needs to be fixed is so gratifying for him?”

Swallow That Pride And Ask For Help!

It was as if by hanging upside down, a switch got turned on – a really good one that holds the true promise of big rewards. Ladies, I cannot express enough how satisfying for him it is for a man to help you. And it is so simple. You just have to be willing to pause and ask for help. You just have to be willing to give up a little bit of control.

When you ask for his help, let him do it his way! Just because men and women tackle problems differently doesn’t make either one inferior or superior, wrong or right. If you are going to surrender and let him help, surrender all the way. He’ll adore you for it.

You might try standing on your head every once in awhile and just see if new perspectives that make life richer and fuller come your way. Do it naked and see how playful the transformation of your relationship can be!

9 Soul Mate Myths That Will Screw Up Your Love Life

Scott and Stephen Petullo — Tue, 14 Oct 2008 19:17:13 +0000

How many times have you heard someone say "I want to find my soul mate?" Since we do intuitive and other types of readings and analyses (using comprehensive handwriting analysis, astrology, numerology and tarot) the subject of love and soul mates is a popular one; we hear it on a weekly, and sometimes daily basis.

Unfortunately, most people’s perception of the concept of soul mates is based on movies and fairytales instead of reality. It’s easy to erroneously assume that everyone has a single soul mate, and if you could just find the person, you’d have the ideal love life.

Well, this simply is false. In fact, the results of our on-going empirical research indicate that there are many misconceptions about soul mates.

In addition, after matching and observing thousands for love relationships as a matchmaker, and regressing nearly as many for past life love issues, we’ve noticed that there are some soul mate myths that repeatedly trip up even the most successful and intelligent people.

1. The "Everyone Has One Soul Mate" Myth

This myth causes plenty of problems. What if you fall in love at age 22 and then the relationship ends when you’re 25? Are you meant to be alone for the rest of your life? Is that as good as it gets?

Depending on your love karma and personal fate, maybe. But it’s always a good idea, when you’re single, to remain open for compatible love possibilities because everyone has many soul mates. A soul mate is simply someone you’ve known in a past life. Some are very compatible for love relationships, and some are not at all.

2. The "When Soul Mates Find Each Other, The Perfect Relationship Will Automatically Ensue" Myth

When soul mates find each other, they sometimes have good karma to enjoy, but more often, they have challenging karma to work through. Why, you ask? Because your soul (not your personality) contracted to return to Earth to grow and learn, and challenges involving a "soul mate" are often the perfect circumstances to accelerate your spiritual growth.

3. The "Soul Mate Relationships are Meant to Last Forever" Myth

If you think about this, it really doesn’t make much sense since everyone is always evolving, changing, improving, and sometimes regressing at different rates. Are you the same person you were 20 years ago? Of course not.

Do you expect your best friend from 6th grade to be your best friend when you’re 80? It can happen, but it’s rare. Do you expect to have your first job for the rest of your life? No. Granted, many couples can "grow old" together and are destined to do so, but often it’s just not meant to be long term. Resisting this will only cause more heartache and stress.

Acceptance of your situation and what you can’t change will allow you to cherish and be grateful for what you have now and what is to come in the future. At the same time, we do acknowledge that the deep love of many soul mate connections is developed over many lifetimes. Love is forever, but unfortunately the duration of relationships (no matter how

strong of a connection) in this incarnation oftentimes aren’t.

4. The "Twin Flame" Myth

Some believe that the "other half" of their soul was created at the same time as their soul, and if you are able to find your twin flame, you will experience a love relationship of the highest kind.

This sounds nice, but all of our findings indicate this theory is complete myth. One of the problems with this belief is that it could potentially cause people to have sky-high expectations of partners that no one could possibly meet. It’s best to just accept each partner and relationship as they are, rather than what you want them to be.

5. The "You Can Create the Love Life of Your Dreams if You Choose to do So" Myth

…

Ask Dan and Jennifer » love life