Ask Dan and Jennifer » masturbation

How To Choose The Right Dildo For You

Serena Paige — Thu, 12 Jan 2012 14:00:53 +0000

Sex toys are great fun, but there are so many to select from, it’s hard to pick! Use these tips to find the perfect one to meet your needs – and desires!

A dildo is one of the most implemented sex toys in the lives of couples and singles around the world. If you are ready to buy your first dildo there are few things you must know beforehand. Choosing the wrong one could be a waste of money. Buying one that is too small or too big for you is not going to give you the satisfaction that you’re the looking for. Choosing the right kind is essential to staying happy in your sex life. If you are unsure about the kind that you need, do not fret. Here is a very quick guide to get you started.

Consider Size

The size of your dildo is going to determine the kind of model that you want. Do you want a 7-inch or a 10-inch length? Do you want a double-dong or are you going more for a model that has a lot of girth? All of these issues will come into play when you are searching for the right one. Are you really tight? What was the size of the best penis that you’ve ever had? The best dildos are going to be slightly bigger than the best penis you have ever had. Most of the one on the market are going to measure from about 4 inches or more. You can even find them up to a foot and a half.

Consider Shape

The shape is extremely important. They come in a wide variety of shapes and can accommodate any woman. You can choose from a shape that is a replica of a real man’s penis, or you can go for something with a more manufactured look. The main thing they need to remember whenever you were buying a dildo is that it is going to be inside of you. They can come curved or straight. Curved dildos are typically used to hit the g-spot on track.

Consider The Materials

The material that your sex toy is made out of is another issue. Typically, dildos are made out of silicone; however, they can also be made out of different materials. Jelly is another material that you can find in the markets. Jelly looks a lot like silicone, however, jelly is more porous and will have to be cleaned on a regular basis. If you are going to be sharing yours with a partner, it’s best to stay away from jelly.

Pyrex glass is a very popular choice because it is extremely hard and can be cleaned very easily. Glass dildos can be heated or cooled with water to give you even more excitement. These tend to be more expensive. If you want to ride it, you might want to go with silicone. If you’re looking for something to use more like a vibrator for continuous hand propelled penetration, you can go with glass.

Vibrating Dildos

So you want to kill two birds with one stone? A vibrating one is the perfect solution for you if you want a vibrator and a dildo all in one. These work the same way as a vibrator and you’re going to get the same experience as you would from any other once it’s turned off. Some come with a suction cup on the bottom so you can ride it. These need batteries so be sure that you have some around. These typically take AAA or AA’s. The problem with these is that they usually don’t come with a clitoris massager. You will only be able to use it for vaginal insertion or you will have to pull it out to use it on your clitoris.

The Cost

The cost can vary depending on the materials, the size and the quality. When you’re looking, always buy a product that is going to last you a long time. This is one of the reasons that so many people buy silicone and glass. They are typically more durable than jelly or the new “cyberskin” models. They can cost anywhere from $5-120 depending on what you’re looking at. It’s better to spend a good amount of money right now and have it for years than to have to replace the dildo in a couple of months because the material is being worn out. Your dildo should come with cleaning suggestions. Follow these, as they will help you keep the materials clean and long-lasting.

Is Porn Responsible For Erectile Dysfunction?

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 01 Jan 2012 14:00:05 +0000

Porn is pretty much everywhere and most guys use it. Since men are visual creatures and usually need to SEE something arousing to be able to get off, most people don’t bat an eye at adult movies anymore. But could porn be the culprit for men who experience erectile dysfunction?

The Prevalence Of Porn

Yes, adult movies really are everywhere, and they’re in every flavor that one could imagine. You can find porn on the Internet easily, with just the few clicks of your mouse. You can find photos or videos of just about anything you might desire, and if you’ve got the money, you can watch live webcam performances of your favorite stars or video chat with live, hot naked women.

But it’s not just the nudity that’s everywhere – what has changed in the porn industry over the years is the need to continually push buttons and push boundaries. What’s new? What’s exciting? What hasn’t been done before? Adult film stars and producers want to get noticed, and the best way to do that isn’t flashing your breasts – that’s been way overdone. The best way to get noticed is to do something that makes people do a double take. “Did they really just do that? Let’s watch!”

What Does Pushing The Envelope Mean For Men?

For many men, the tasteful nude spreads in Playboy just doesn’t do it anymore. But neither does some of the more risque stuff. Many men are so bored by “just naked women” or “just sex” or “just anal sex” that they continually look for new things to become aroused by. Since the adult entertainment industry basically caters to these desires, it’s a recipe for disaster.

So instead of browsing through tastefully done photos of gorgeous naked women, men are looking for more extreme forms of sexual gratification, including hardcore sex, rough anal sex, golden showers and more. Since men get desensitized to seeing such extreme things on screen, what happens is that it becomes more and more difficult to become aroused through normal nudity or normal sex.

Does It Really Cause Erectile Dysfunction?

Yep. For example, say a man is used to masturbating while watching really rough BDSM or domination. This is what arouses him, and he is always looking for something that he hasn’t seen before. So when he goes to have sex with his wife, what happens? He’s looking at a normal, naked woman and unfortunately, it does nothing to turn him on since he’s so accustomed to being aroused by porn that pushes the envelope.

So he can’t get it up. And she gets frustrated, thinking it is her fault.

In reality, the man has trained himself to sexually respond only to certain things, and the specifics differ from guy to guy. But the concept is the same – if a man masturbates regularly to intense porn, he will most likely have difficulty becoming aroused by normal sex with his partner, resulting in difficulty achieving an erection.

What To Do About It

If you find that you struggle with erectile dysfunction and suspect it may be due to porn, you can take control of your sex life again if you want to have satisfying sex with your partner.

Start by weaning yourself off the most extreme stuff. Take a few minutes to analyze the type of porn you watch at present – what kind of things does it feature? What is it that turns you on the most? Whatever that is, take it down a notch. For example, if you’re currently watching porn that features heavy BDSM, try going down a notch to something that features bondage only. Then you can downgrade to light bondage and so on. In theory, this does not sound difficult to do. The real challenge is avoiding the temptation to watch what you normally do.

Think of it as training yourself to enjoy porn that is much closer to the realistic sexual experiences that you have with a partner, instead of only being able to enjoy things that are only attainable through porn.

When you accomplish this, you will be more satisfied during your sexual encounters with your partner. You will enjoy regular intercourse much, much more than masturbation and masturbation will simply become a “quick necessity” rather than a go-to for the satisfaction of your sexual fantasies. In short, your sex life with your lover will become much, much better and you won’t be in danger of experiencing erectile dysfunction during normal intercourse!

5 Ways To Get Him To Stop Watching Porn

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 27 Dec 2011 14:00:46 +0000

Porn is something all guys watch at some point in their lives. It’s a normal and natural thing to be curious about porn and to want to see what it’s all about – it’s even more common for men to use it when they get older during masturbation, simply because men are visual creatures and need something to look at when they do their business. But what do you do if he wants porn on all the time? How can you get him to look at YOU instead?

1. Find Out What He’s Watching

Whether you do this by asking him straight up what kind of porn he likes, or by doing a little secret digging in his computer files while he’s not home, you need to find out what kind of porn he’s watching. This may be the key here. If he likes BDSM or even has a secret fetish that he feels like he can’t share with you, what he watches during masturbation can give you a clue. If you find that what he watches when he masturbates differs greatly from what you two do together, try incorporating a little bit of what he likes into sex. Do it slowly so you don’t tip him off. But if you start playing the game the way he likes it, he’ll be more apt to do it with you than to have vanilla sex and retire to his computer or television later.

2. Make Amateur Porn

Guys are visual, period. They need to see things to get off. Women can use their imaginations all day long and imagine in great detail everything they need to during a masturbation session, but men find that very difficult. It’s much easier if they can look at a bouncy pair of breasts or a dripping wet….well, you get the picture – while they get the job done. So if you’re tired of him looking at other women instead of you, don’t ask him to stop looking at porn flat out – because that’s not going to happen. Instead, make porn for him – of you!

Take some naughty pictures of yourself or have a trusted friend do it. You can throw the digitals into a free, easy to use online editing program to make yourself look your best – or if you REALLY want to go all out, have professional boudoir photos done. If he has some really sexy pictures of YOU to look at, he might not go looking at other girls all that often.

3. How Do You Look?

Guys like different body types. Some men enjoy very thin, athletic women, while other guys like a few rolls they can grab on to while they slam into you from behind. It’s all about personal preference. So don’t assume that your man wants to see you skin and bones just because that’s what all the Victoria’s Secret lingerie ads look like. But take some time to really think about the type of body your man does find attractive. This is where checking out his porn collection can come in handy. Are all the girls a little round, while you look like you just ran a marathon? Try packing on a couple pounds if you’re comfortable with that.

Does he seem to like more athletic women, while you’re a little more round? Try getting healthier and losing a few pounds, if you’re comfortable with it. You don’t have to change your looks to become a complete carbon copy of his little porno mistresses, but if you take some time to think about what HE really likes and try to meet those desires a little, you’ll notice a huge difference in how much more attention he pays to you.

4. Get Some Damn Confidence

Honestly, it doesn’t matter THAT much to your guy what you’re packing. He wouldn’t be with you if he didn’t find you at least somewhat attractive. You want to know the biggest difference between those porn girls and you? Confidence! They know what they’re doing, they’re confident in their ability to do it well and that translates on screen. Slip on a pair of heels, strut your stuff and act like you KNOW you look good! Because you do! Just a change in your attitude and enthusiasm about the way you look and sex in general is enough to get him to turn off the tube and follow you to the bedroom.

5. Have More Sex

Next time he wants it, don’t brush him off. Don’t tell him you have a headache, don’t tell him you’re on your period, don’t tell him that you “just don’t feel like it” and most certainly, you should not do it and fake an orgasm. Just get into it! The more sex you have, the more you’re going to want it. Same goes for him. If he knows he can get mind blowing sex pretty much any time he wants, he’s not going to want the porn as much, if at all. So don’t wave him off next time he appears interested in having sex with you. Turn the interest right around and pounce on him! Give him something to remember next time he goes looking for something good to watch. He might just say, “Forget it!” and go looking for you instead!

Best Male Masturbation Secrets Of 2011

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 11 Dec 2011 14:00:14 +0000

Male masturbation has taken on a life of its own as men get more comfortable with masturbating and using sex toys. As society evolves, male masturbation becomes less and less taboo, simply because people are starting to realize that every guy does it! It is becoming widely accepted for men to purchase masturbation aids such as pornography or sleeves and lube. Women are being educated about how it is a normal, natural thing for men to do and even a healthy part of every relationship, so they are no longer getting jealous over their partner’s masturbation habits or asking their partners to refrain from it.

Embrace male masturbation as a great way to relieve sexual frustration, help prevent prostate cancer, relieve painful headaches, give yourself a good mood boost or even help you sleep. There are a number of awesome benefits that you can reap. Encourage your partner to masturbate as well. Check out our best tips this year – and take a look at the best female sex tips of 2011 – and make next year even better when it comes to learning new and different ways to satisfy yourself!

Don’t forget to check out some of our all time favorite male masturbation articles!

Best Sex Toys & Vibrators Of 2011

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 05 Dec 2011 14:00:06 +0000

Sex toys and vibrators make getting it on so much more fun!

Using a vibrator or a g-spot stimulator can help a woman to discover new things about her body and have orgasms like she’s never had before, while masturbating with a soft jelly or silicone sleeve can feel way better than his hand.

Items specifically designed for sexual pleasure are becoming more and more popular, with less and less taboo surrounding them. Many people are choosing to take sexual pleasure into their own hands and investing in sex toys for the very first time. Also, more and more couples are venturing into the sex toy arena in an effort to spice up their sex life. Using sex toys as a couple, either on each other or as an addition to oral sex or fingering, can make sex with your partner hotter than it ever has been before!

Check out our favorite sex toys articles and reviews of the year here!

Also, don’t forget to check out the all-time best sex toy articles!

Here are some our favorite sex toys that we’ve tried this year – don’t forget to get yours!

Pjur Lube & Personal Products (our fave lube ever!)
LELO Nea Clitoral Vibrator (also another one of our personal favorites)
LELO Mia Vibrator (USB charger – need we say more?)
We-Vibe Touch Clitoral Vibrator (like a waterproof version of the LELO Nea)
Under The Bed Restraint System (perfect for beginner’s bondage)
Wild G-Spot Vibrator (we like this one so much, we got you 50% off our FAVORITE vibrator!)

Best Female Masturbation Secrets Of 2011

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 03 Dec 2011 14:00:51 +0000

Female masturbation is more common than you think – lots of girls are into it. However, not every girl knows how best to stimulate her clitoris or which sex toy is perfect for g-spot stimulation during a solo session. Guys can also gain a lot of knowledge about how to give a woman an orgasm by checking out these tips and how girls get themselves off when they’re alone. Some takeaways this year about women’s solo habits:

It’s completely normal! Masturbation is perfectly normal and even healthy for male and female teens going through puberty, adults, singles and even couples in a long term relationship or marriage!
Masturbation can help relieve headaches and other pain. An orgasm can make you feel lots better after a stressful day, or when you have a headache.
Sex toys are a must have! While doing it with your fingers is pretty darn convenient, very few things beat the kind of orgasms you can have when you bring a vibrator into the mix. You don’t have to have a whole slew of sex toys (although that’s pretty fun too), but one or two trusted toys that get the job done and done well definitely belong in your nightstand drawer. Our fave sex toys this year are the LELO Nea & The Wild G-Spot Vibrator (we love this one, so we got you a sweet 50% OFF deal). Don’t forget lube – our personal favorite is Pjur Lube!

Here are the most awesome women’s solo articles from this past year!

And our all time favorite, BEST article on female masturbation is:

Top 10 Female Masturbation Tips

If you’re a girl who doesn’t masturbate or masturbate regularly, make 2012 the year that you’re going to start exploring your own body and taking control of your own orgasms! Women who masturbate are almost always more sexually satisfied – especially if they’re in a relationship – than their non-masturbating sisters.

Orgasm Dilemma – What To Do If You Can’t Have One & Your Guy Gave Up

Kaylen Jackson — Fri, 02 Dec 2011 14:00:35 +0000

An orgasm isn’t always easy for a man to give, and he can quickly get discouraged if he can’t find a “formula” to get you over the top in what he views as a reasonable period of time. But should you just forget about ever reaching orgasm during sex at all? And is it really only up to him to learn how to give you pleasure?

A Woman’s Orgasm

It’s not easy to make a woman orgasm, and unfortunately, many guys give up before they’ve ever learned how to make their partner climax. A woman requires a clear mind, a relaxed body, emotional immersion and the right physical stimulation to get over the top. Finding the right combination of these things (which could differ on any given day depending on the woman’s mood) can be daunting at best. Don’t put all the blame on your guy though – having an orgasm starts with YOU.

Start Masturbating

How can you expect your guy to learn what pleases you if you don’t even know? How can he learn how to bring you to an orgasm if you can’t even do it yourself? You know what gets you relaxed. When you touch down there, you know immediately if it feels good or if it doesn’t. Face it – he can’t tell what you like or don’t like unless YOU show him or tell him! It’s not like as soon as he touches you or licks you he knows whether that stroke worked or not.

Don’t turn your nose up at “clicking your own mouse” – there’s nothing wrong with female masturbation and it’s one of the only paths to supreme sexual bliss for a woman (that is, unless you’re with a total Casanova but even then, all women are different and he may not know how to please YOU). After masturbating a few times, you’re going to learn that you like it this way but not that way. You’ll figure out that you can reach orgasm faster if you do it like this, not like that. You’ll come away with a better understanding of your body and your sexuality, plus lots of new ways to play.

So grab a vibrator, use your fingers or whatever else you want and indulge in a explorative solo session. Do what feels good. Remember what it is. Do it again. Repeat.

Teach Your Man

When you find out what works, let your guy know. Don’t expect him to find out all on his own, that’s just cruel. He can’t – you don’t have a magic indicator that lets him know when he’s getting warmer or if he’s doing things the right way. If you prefer circles on your clitoris as opposed to an up and down motion, by all means tell the guy! He’ll appreciate it so much more than if you let him stumble around in the dark and get upset when he doesn’t do the right thing.

A lot of girls are too quiet during sex. They fail to let their man know what feels good during sex, so he never really knows. Many girls don’t make a peep, or much noise at all whether it feels incredible or whether it hurts like hell. So a guy will try and try and try, but will soon give up because he doesn’t feel like he’s getting anywhere. If this describes you, take a long look in the mirror if you want someone to blame for not getting off during sex. You cannot expect your guy to get it right if you don’t give him any feedback. Period.

How To Let Him Know What You Like

Dirty talk is an excellent way to not only let your lover know what really gets you going, but also to spice things up and add variety to your sex life. Dirty talk in and of itself can get you more turned on and closer to orgasm than ever before, not to mention its added use for communication of likes and dislikes.

Next time he makes a move that feels better than the rest, say “Oh yeah, just like that.” If he’s in the wrong place and suddenly moves to the right one, shout “Yes! Right there!” Don’t be afraid to get into it, he’ll think it’s hot. You can even use dirty talk to get really naughty if you want to. Tell him, “I want you to ____ my ____ right now until I ____ all over you!” Ad lib as necessary. After the initial shock and disbelief that these things are coming out of your mouth, you’ll love voicing what you want until you’re coming.

Overcoming Shyness

If you’re too shy to tell him outright what you want either during a normal dinner conversation (yes, it’s perfectly appropriate to say “Hey honey, I’d like to try ___ tonight” over braised chicken) or during sex, then you might think you’re out of luck and will never be able to communicate your desires to your lover. Wrong! You can, without using any words at all!

Just make more noise when he does the right thing. Body language is also a big indicator that he’s on the right track too. Gasp, moan, shout his name, buck your hips – do anything to let him know that you really LOVE what he’s doing. If he never gets this feedback from you, he’ll assume that every single thing he does is wrong – and then give up.

He may change his moves around and try to do something different, but he’ll figure out what you enjoy the most pretty quickly when you stop moaning when he does the wrong thing. That’s right – if he starts getting off course, you’re not going to be as vocal. He will automatically take that as a cue that he needs to go back to what he was doing before, when you were moaning, screaming and bucking wildly.

The icing on the cake? He’ll actually do what you want – meaning, you might actually get off.

Female Masturbation – 5 Shower Favorites!

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 27 Nov 2011 14:00:39 +0000

Female masturbation exists and the tub is one of the ladies’ preferred places because it’s so easy and private. Here are five ways women masturbate in the tub!

With A Detachable/Massage Showerhead

This is perhaps the easiest female masturbation techniques for the bathtub. A detachable showerhead is perfect, because it allows the girl to aim the stream of water wherever she wants it – either on her whole vulva or directly on the clitoris. A massage showerhead is even better, because it features several different pulsating patterns. A detachable massage showerhead is pretty much a water squirting vibrator.

A massage showerhead that doesn’t detach is still a female masturbation fave, because a girl can still lie on the bottom of the tub underneath the water, and let the water pulsate on her vulva. She can angle her body any way she likes to get the sensations she desires.

Under The Bathtub Faucet

This works well for women who either have only a tub or can’t use their showerhead for female masturbation for one reason or another. A woman will scoot her bottom up all the way to the front of the tub, so she can place her vulva directly underneath the running tub faucet. This works better for smaller women or ladies who are more flexible, because the position required to get adequate stimulation to the clitoris can be quite difficult to get into.

With A Waterproof Sex Toy

Having a waterproof sex toy on hand is probably the easiest way to get off in the water. Female masturbation has endless possibilities when you use sex toys to reach orgasm. A waterproof sex toy can be used while standing in the water or submerged in the tub.

A few tips for buying sex toys for the tub:

Look for rechargeable ones that don’t require batteries. They are longer lasting and much easier to use.
Pay attention to whether it is “waterproof” or “splashproof.” “Splashproof” generally means that bodily fluids and some splashing won’t bother it, but it’s not really suitable for the tub. Don’t assume anything is waterproof just because it looks like it is – make sure the box or toy specs state that it is.
Invest in silicone lube. It works much, much better in the water and doesn’t rinse right off like water based lube does. Yeah, you’ll need soap and water to get it all the way off, but it lasts longer in a wet environment. Just make sure any sex toys you’re using with silicone lube aren’t also made out of silicone as this will degrade your toy more quickly.

Good, Old Fashioned Fingering

Some girls are incredibly discreet about their female masturbation habits. For this reason, many of them choose not to use any sex toys that could get them caught. This is also why the bathroom is such a great place for masturbation – you can do so under the ruse of washing up and usually no one will bother you.

Many women will simply use their fingers when masturbating in the bathroom. Fingers are readily available and covering up what you’re doing should someone walk in the bathroom is much easier since you don’t really have anything to hide anywhere.

Electric Toothbrushes, Shampoo Bottles, Etc.

Many ladies get creative when it comes to female masturbation in the bathroom. If they don’t have any sex toys on hand (which many girls don’t because they don’t want to spend the money or are afraid someone will find their stash), they can use a variety of things that are already in the bathroom.

For example, some girls use a spinning toothbrush on their clitoris instead of a vibrator. While a sex toy is much, much easier to use (and better) than a toothbrush, you can’t usually leave your sex toys out on the counter next to everyone else’s toothbrushes without getting caught. Slick shampoo bottles and even bars of soap can be used to slide around the clitoris during a bath.

Investing in a great sex toy to use in the bath is probably your best bet, but if you’re in a pinch, look around – you probably have something you can use. Just steer clear of razors of any kind (ouch!) and make sure you have another toothbrush on hand you can use if you end up getting yours “dirty.” In fact, buying a brand new one from the store so you can distinguish between the two is probably a really good idea.

6 Female Masturbation Secrets!

Michael Webb — Sun, 13 Nov 2011 14:00:47 +0000

Female masturbation does exist – and it can be the key to unlocking a totally hot and ravishing sex life!

Female masturbation has existed since women were young girls squeezing stuff between their legs. While many still struggle with the conditioning that anything sexual is sinful, more and more women are admitting their needs and embracing the same. They jill off, pet the kitty or stroke the cat. If they’re not gonna get some from their man, they’ll settle with self-service.

Masturbation, as an invaluable spring of well-being, indeed, is the World’s Favorite Pastime. As George Carlin expressed it, “If God intended us not to masturbate, He would have made our arms shorter.”

It’s The Only Way Some Women Can Orgasm

It’s the only source of O’s for many women, keeping everybody sane, and making up for life’s numerous disappointments – horrible sex included. Petting the kitty affords Eve to settle and be less demanding during sex.

The ladies got everything to gain, considering it doesn’t cost a single penny. Besides being the orgasmic highway, it’s loads of pleasure & fun! They can do it anywhere, they don’t have to dress up for it or put on serious pounds of make-up. They can have it anytime. Most importantly, they have perfect control of the proceedings. They decide how long and how many they’ll get.

Unless she’s one of those ladies who never looked down there, a woman has been touching herself years before she even met you. She has been helping herself before she even got a shot at sex. And guess what, over the years, she has become really good at it – winning herself the easiest, fastest and most intense orgasms. She knows her body best.

Over time, women have perfected a personal process and a set of techniques to reach orgasm.

Of course she has. She knows the type of stimulation needed & the specific parts to be attended. Women know how to turn themselves on and push themselves off.

Masturbation is “practice sex” – an imitation of the real thing – note that to get off, the same organs are given the same type of stimulation. For example, men can’t get enough of blowjobs, handjobs and penetrations because these stimulate the penis in the same manner as jacking off.

So during sex, replicate her jilling moves, especially during manual stimulation. You won’t be able to do that until you know exactly how she does it — so ask her to give you a show. Remember that every time a woman touches herself in front of a man, she’s schooling him and giving him insider info on her O’s!

What To Look For

You may think, “All women masturbate the same way.” Not at all. That’s only the big picture. Go into details and discover that women treat themselves very uniquely. Pay close attention to how she tangos with her vulva, her clitoris in particular – she’s giving you a private lesson from years of personal experience. Here are six elements to consider:

General Types

Though the most common method is ‘hands-on’, the routes to Orgasmville are different. She could employ objects like dildos, vibrators, pillows, bed sheets, a spray of warm/cold water, bottles, vegetables and practically anything she can get her hands on. While most women do it while resting on their backs, there are also others who prefer to be on their stomachs. Still, there are those who never use hands but press their thighs in a familiar rhythm.

Watch for her leg positions. Are they spread, bent, raised or together?

Speed & Timing

During sex, a woman is usually under her handler’s mercy. In masturbation, she has perfect control of speed and rhythm. Find out the gear she’s most happy with. See how fast she works it and try to extricate a rhythm or beat. (Notice that she doesn’t operate in a single speed but sometimes speeds up and slows down.)

While nothing beats having her guiding hand over yours, as long as you’re looking, compare how you operated in the past. Were you too slow or too fast? How was your rhythm? Apply these lessons during intercourse as she’ll be needing speeds similar to the ones she’s shown you.

Type Of Stimulation

Faithfully clone her ways.

It’s unfair for women to be expected to climax with the type of stimulation some guys give. Why? Because it’s not only grossly insufficient, it’s all wrong! How can she be expected to cum with a method totally alien and perhaps even opposite to what she’s accustomed to?! (It’s like demanding from you ejaculation when all she’s doing is tapping your penis.)

During masturbation, a woman has perfect control of the stimulation she gets. So observe her hands, palms, fingers, everything. Pay close attention to the DIRECTIONS her hands go. Is it clockwise, counterclockwise, up-down, side-to-side? Look for patterns and combinations – she has them. See if there’s some pinching, squeezing, tapping, patting, tugging or pulling going on.

Notice her applied PRESSURE. Some stroke minimally, others crave hard action. Again, different strokes for different folks, whatever works for her, works!

How often do her fingers venture inside the vagina? You might be in for a surprise. Blokes imagine that when women jill off, it’s all poke-poke-poke inside. I’m sorry to tell you that this doesn’t happen as often as we’d like to think. Some don’t even bother sliding fingers inside. After all, her clitoris is on the outside.

Specific Areas

Those who shove fingers or dildos oftentimes aim it somewhere specific. It could be at the G-spot or any of her sweet spots. Find out where these are.

Another thing, if she’s using one hand, observe what the other is doing. Is it sensually stroking her breasts? If so, observe carefully how she works them. Usually, when a woman touches herself, other areas besides the vulva gets attention.

The Environment

Environmental conditions are just as important. When women treat themselves, they usually prepare the mood by setting the environment to certain specifications. They set things right, for example, by initially taking a warm or cold shower, lighting candles, even dressing up! They prefer a certain time or day, a particular music, even props. These are her secrets, (she may not even be conscious of them.)

Conversely, guys don’t bother with this nonsense. Men do it who-knows-when and who-knows-where. Backrooms, dark alleys, wet pavements don’t make any difference, so long as they get their hands on johnny, it’s all good!

Psychological Conditions

Sex has two sides – physical and psychological. So far, we’ve dealt only with physical conditions, but just as important are the psychological ones.

What fantasies spur her? What thoughts does she focus on? Later on, it will be clearer to you how a woman’s thoughts and frame of mind affect her ability to cum. Suffice it is to say here, for now, that psychological pressures make reaching orgasm difficult for a girl.

So there it is, six things to look for when your girl schools you. It may sound complicated, but it’s really not that bad, especially when you see her with eyes closed, completely enjoying herself. Don’t you want to give her that same bliss?

Ask her to show you. As the Chinese saying goes, “He who asks is a fool for 5 minutes, but he who does not remains a fool forever.”

Hands Free Orgasm – Can Women Masturbate Without Touching Themselves?

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 03 Nov 2011 14:00:51 +0000

An orgasm usually happens when a woman stimulates her clitoris or g-spot – or her partner does. It’s assumed that a woman must be stimulated to reach orgasm, but everyone says that a girl’s brain is an instrumental part in getting to climax – so can a woman reach orgasm without ever touching herself at all?

The Brain Plays A Huge Role In Arousal For Girls

You may have heard that a girl’s brain is important when it comes to sex, but you probably really have no idea just how important this organ is – even more so than any other part of her body! You might think that her clitoris is more important, or her breasts are, but that is far from the truth – her clitoris won’t even respond if her mind isn’t already engaged! Also, if a woman is thinking about other things during sex or masturbation, is stressed out or worried, it is going to be extremely difficult for her to have an orgasm. For a woman to respond really well to sex, she’s got to be mentally engaged before she ever becomes physically engaged. Which means you need to expand your definition of foreplay beyond just touching – you have to start by engaging her MIND.

It Is Possible For The Brain To Produce An Orgasm Alone

If a girl’s mind is focused on things other than sex, she’s not going to have an orgasm. That much we know. In theory, is it possible that if a girl’s mind is focused only on sex and reaching orgasm, that she will? Yes, in theory it is possible. The brain’s connection to arousal in a woman is a very, very powerful thing! There are a couple of different ways this can happen, including spontaneous orgasms (whether medicine induced or not) and actually willing yourself to have an orgasm by only stimulating your brain.

Spontaneous Orgasm

You might be wondering if this is a bit like spontaneous combustion and in a way, it is. A spontaneous orgasm happens just like that – spontaneously. It can happen out of nowhere all of a sudden, or it can also happen when a woman has been thinking about sex so much and is so turned on that the slightest brush of her clothing or pressure in the right spot will make her climax.

Anti-Depressants And Spontaneous Orgasms

Many medical professionals believe that there is a link between taking anti-depressant medication and having spontaneous orgasms, however, there is no real data out there to suggest this, simply because most women who experience spontaneous orgasms do so in public – at work, on the bus, at the soccer game – and try their best to hide it. Some of the medications that include this side effect are Paxil, Prozac, Celexa, and Wellbutrin. Discuss this possible side effect with your doctor before going on any kind of anti-depressant medication.

Can You Teach Yourself To Have An Orgasm Without Touching Yourself?

Yes! You can actually teach yourself just about anything if you really put your mind to it – and there again is proof of how much power the mind has over the body. Here’s how to do it:

Start with normal masturbation. Use your hand, sex toys, or whatever you normally do to masturbate and bring yourself to orgasm.
However, this is where you’ll want to start to bring your mind into it more.
As you experience each pleasurable sensation, focus on how it feels and how you feel when it happens.
Begin contracting your vaginal muscles.
Gradually back off from the toy, while focusing on what you’re thinking and how you’re feeling.

With practice, you’ll be surprised at what you can do! Your mind is incredibly powerful – with practice, you can actually will your body to reach climax with just your mind!

Hands Free Masturbation

While many women will experience a completely hands free orgasm, many won’t and having an orgasm without directly touching yourself can be as pleasurable. Try new masturbation techniques that don’t involve your hands. The Sybian is a popular women’s sex toy and it allows the woman to “ride” the dildo, with or without vibration.

Hands free clitoral vibrators are also a good choice to help teach your body to have an orgasm without direct stimulation from your hands. They are simply placed over the clitoris and held in place with straps, and are usually operated by remote control. These can be a great way to train yourself to experience “hands free orgasms” and can help you bridge to stimulation free orgasms.

Dirty Talk: Practice Makes Perfect!

Michael Webb — Sat, 29 Oct 2011 14:00:13 +0000

Dirty talk can be intimidating if you’ve never done it before. But if you do it over and over, you’ll get better at it – and you can make your sex life HOT! If you are new to dirty talk, you will most likely need some practice so that you are comfortable with the act when it’s time to begin.

How To Get Used To It

You can practice just like you would for a speech and even do it in front of the mirror. Try doing it out loud while you masturbate. You can practice with sexting, writing short notes or via email (but be very careful when sending to a work email address!)

Allow yourself some fantasy time and as your mind wanders as to what it is you’d like to be doing, jot it down. Once you give yourself room for self expression and the permission to write down these sexual thoughts that are floating around inside your head, you will find out just what kind of phrases turn you on. Choose a few at a time to spring on your spouse the next time you’re in bed together. Some people find it much easier to put the words down and use letters as a way of beginning their exploration into dirty talk. The more you use stimulating conversation the easier it gets and it will become like second nature.

It Takes Two To Tango

Dirty talk works best when it is used as a dialogue. No one wants to be doing all of the talking in any conversation. Encourage your partner after they’ve joined in by telling them the next day how hot you thought it was when they said something that sticks out in your mind. If you do this, they won’t be left wondering if anything they uttered was embarrassing or whether you found any of it odd or inappropriate. A little encouragement can go a long, long way.

If your partner is a novice or not very vocal, here are some ways to help get them in the game:

Watch an adult movie together that has dirty talk in it – either in the bedroom or out. This can help set the pace.
Read a book passage that has some very erotic text – these are very easy to find in most bookstores and are chocked full of plenty of sex scenes. Take turns reading them to each other or hi-lite passages that turn you on when you’re alone so that you can read them during playtime in bed.
Pick up a book on erotic poetry. Read portions to each other while rubbing on your partner. Ask them which ones they found the most stimulating while you were reading to them.
Write sexy emails back and forth and try to get the dialogue going. (Again, you probably do not need to use work email addresses for this).

Questions To Ask In The Bedroom

Do you want me to do it fast or slow tonight?
Do you like the feel of my wet ___?
Are you ready to shoot your load in me?
Where do you want me to ejaculate?

Let your partner start out with “yes” or “no” responses back to these open ended questions. Then encourage them by saying, “please, tell me more,” as they get more comfortable about talking back to you.

How To Become The Sensual Seductress Your Man Fantasizes About!

Brenda Lyttle — Wed, 26 Oct 2011 18:28:52 +0000

Most sex tips are going to be lost on you if you’re hiding your erotic side. However, these sex tips will teach you how to become the naughty girl your guy wants!

If racy undergarments, racks of sex toys, and adult videos make you want to hide beneath the sheets, you sure are oblivious of what real moments of ecstasy and fun feels like. It is indeed a curious exhilaration to discover your sensual side and embrace a whole new world of sexual fun.

Before we get to the point, the first of these sex tips would be – relax! Put your guards down and you, the uptight lot – think less, and feel more. Now that you are ready to experience the best of your body and carnal desires, here is a list of suggestions that would transform you into a seductive tigress:

Wear Sexy Lingerie That Reveals Your Curves Just Right

When you feel sexy, you look sexy. If thongs are what caters to your fancy, try going in for a nice lace thong that has a wider back to ensure better comfort, like the popular 4811 thong from Hanky Panky, or the Never Say Never by Cosabella. Another secret is hidden in boy shorts. Guys love them – really! So get yourself one that fits you, and gives a small glimpse of your cheeks. Sometimes the idea of sex is itself so erotic. Lace boy shorts are a good pick.

Also, you cannot deny how hot garter belts are! You can either keep them hanging loose on your bare legs, or simply clip them to some thigh-highs. Both ways, it’s gonna be irresistible!

Dive In With Sex Toys

Do not complicate. Since you would be a beginner with sex toys, start on with anything that is small and easy to use. A LELO Mia or Nea are discreet choice for masturbation. For some adventurous fun, the We-Vibe and Pleasure Commander are some of the best selling sex toys for couples. One thing that you must not forget is that these are mere toys and not a replacement of your lover – they simply make lovemaking more fun and brings in versatility to your bedroom.

Try Lube

Silicone-based lubes, such as Pjur or Swiss Navy are great choices as they do not contain any biocides or parabens, and often remain slippery for a longer duration, in comparison to their water-based counterparts.

Be sure to stick to glycerin-free lubes, as anything that contains glycerin is bound to have sugar that can instigate yeast infection. Lubes that have warming ingredients have also been known to have caused some allergic reactions, so they are also a big NO! But you can always take lube in your hand and rub them for a few minutes, it will warm up on its own.

Watch Some Good Porn

Yes, there are adult videos that both men and women can enjoy together. Anything that will have some stimulating foreplay and a bit of storyline will get you started well. Couples videos usually make for a good watch as they normally focus shots, face shots, have attractive performers, as well as more sensuality that will get you going between the sheets right away. The Masseuse starring Jenna Jameson or the Chemistry Series starring Tristen Taormino are a big hit among the couples. Eyes of Desire or The Bridal Shower are some good bets if you want some story to go along with it.

Grab Some Erotic Books

Instinctively you may be thinking of picking up some how-to books to explore new ideas. There are many books out there that can inspire you immensely. A game of truth or dare, or reading aloud an erotic fiction to your lover can also ignite that fizzle and make the passion burn forever.

Creativity in bedroom keeps boredom out of your relationship and entwines you with him for love, lust and more, that is bound to last until eternity.

How To Tell If YOU Need A New Sex Toy!

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 23 Oct 2011 14:00:30 +0000

Sex toys can burn out over time, or you can get tired of them. Sometimes, you just want something you’ve never tried before! From time to time, you’re going to have to replace your sex toys or buy new ones, but it can be hard to part with a favorite. Here are five things to look for to tell if you need to chuck your current vibrator and go shopping for sex toys!

It Runs On Batteries

There are a lot of great sex toys that run on batteries, but there are far, far better ones that are rechargeable! They cost a little more, but in the long run, you’re paying for that in batteries anyways. Rabbit style vibrators use a LOT of juice, and if you own one, you’re probably at the store buying batteries every other week.

If your favorite sex toy runs on batteries, consider replacing it with a version that is rechargeable. If you’re looking for a Rabbit style vibrator, try the LELO Ina. Smaller bullet style vibrators also come rechargeable.

It Contains Phthalates

While jelly sex toys look really pretty, they can contain dangerous chemicals called phthalates that have been linked to cancer. If your sex toy contains phthalates, you could be unknowingly increasing your risk for developing cervical cancer. Ditch the cheap jelly materials and get something made from body safe silicone, wood or hard plastic. If you absolutely have to have sex toys made from jelly material or any material containing phthalates, protect yourself by slipping a condom over it before insertion.

The Vibrations Aren’t As Strong As They Used To Be

When you first got your vibrator, it was perfect. The vibrations were exquisite and catapulted you to orgasm land in no time flat. But a few months later, you notice that it takes a little longer to reach orgasm, and you have to press a little harder each time to feel the vibrations. Are the vibrations getting weaker? Probably. Sex toys aren’t made to last forever. If yours constantly sounds like it’s running out of power (even if you just put fresh batteries in), it may be time for an upgrade.

It Looks Dingy Or Has An Odor

Unfortunately, not all sex toys are non-porous. When shopping for one, try to get a body safe toy that IS non-porous (like glass), but you may not have known that going into purchasing your current one. If any of the sex toys you’re currently using don’t look as clear or shiny as they used to, or they’ve picked up an odor, it’s time to throw them away. Sex toys made from porous materials like jelly can pick up bacteria during use, and body fluids can begin to soak in. When you really think about it, you don’t want that hanging around in your nightstand!

You Want A New One

Every girl should have her own sex toy – or more than one! Couples should also have plenty of sex toys to play with! If you simply want a brand spanking new toy (whether it is an exact replica of your very favorite or something you’ve never tried before), you have every right to get yourself what you want! Even if you just bought one and you’re not happy with it or want something to accompany it, go out and get another one! Get whatever you want, provided you’ve got the funds.

Get A Good One!

You also have the right to invest in a good sex toy. Go for quality materials from a reputable manufacturer. Be choosy. Consider where you want to use it and what you want it to do. Do you want to travel with it, or do you want one that is ultra discreet? Try the LELO Mia – it’s rechargeable via USB port and looks like a tube of lipstick. Do you want a clitoral vibrator that is completely waterproof and you can use in the tub or shower? Get the We-Vibe Touch.

Look for the sex toys that meet both your needs and your desires. If you really would benefit from having a vibrator that you can take with you anywhere (for example, if you travel a lot for work), or the only peace and quiet you get in a crazy household is in the shower, then spending the extra money on a vibrator that meets your needs and gives you what you want is well worth it.

The 10 CRAZIEST Things To Do In The Bedroom!

He Said/She Said with John & Jenna — Fri, 23 Sep 2011 17:00:40 +0000

Sex doesn’t have to be mundane – open your mind to some of the wildest things you can do during sex and find out just how amazing it can be!

What She Said:

Missionary

The good, old-fashioned missionary position. Sure, it has some stodgy connotations due to being heavily (though erroneously) associated with the teachings of the medieval Catholic Church and their subsequent missionaries. Famed sex researcher Alfred Kinsey may have gotten his facts wrong, but that doesn’t take away from this pleasurable act. The missionary position remains popular due to the participant’s ability to kiss, make close eye contact and increase skin-to-skin sensations. This can get totally crazy if you let it. Sounds good to me!

Sixty Nine

While it evokes images of the swinging Sixties, this position is far from out of date. Known for it’s distinct advantage to both give and receive oral pleasure, it remains at the top of many people’s list as an energetic and fun form of foreplay.

Reverse Cowgirl

Giddy up, partner – literally! The reverse cowgirl provides the partner on top with the ability to control speed and thrust – and provides women the opportunity to play with her man’s balls as well as her own clitoris. Any arguments?

Mutual Masturbation

What better way to develop intimacy while showing each other what you like than through mutual masturbation?

Snuggling

Aw, heck. Call me a romantic, but nothing makes me happier than cuddling in bed while resting my head on my partner’s heart. And it’s certainly a bonus if he plays with my hair!

What He Said:

I like her suggestions, so I will add a few different ones to the pile.

Same Room Sex

If you’re not into swinging, or your just thinking about it, or you simply have voyeuristic tendencies, this option is for you. It’s pretty simple. Two (or more) couples get it on in the same room. It’s hot, it’s safe, and you get all the visual benefits of swinging without any of the negatives (STDs).

Performance Art

If you’ve ever had voyeuristic fantasies, or wanted to try a three way, this is a great baby step in this direction. You and your partner simply get it on in front of an audience of your choosing. It can be a man, a woman, a group of people, whatever. They can’t touch. They can only look, and they have to be naked.

Threesome

Yes, it’s a bit cliché, but it’s damn fun. They can be two girls one guy, or one girl two guys, either way you slice it’s good times had by all. The only rule here is that everyone has to be on the same page. If one guy isn’t into double penetration or having his naughty parts potential touch another dude’s or if one of the girl’s isn’t bisexual, it won’t work. They can be heterosexual in nature, where people of the same gender don’t play together or they can be a bi-sexual free for all. Whatever you decide!

Sex Toy Time

The Liberator sex wedge is a fantastic accessory for those looking to enhance their love making. There a host of different accessories you can bring into the bedroom. Dildos, strap ons, anal beads, butt plugs, cock rings and anything else you can find in a sex shop can be great accessories for your love making. Try it all and remember, anything goes as long as it’s safe and consensual.

Lights, Camera, Action!

Boudouir photography is a great way to spice up your love life and give your lover a gift that will turn him or her on for years to come. You can shoot at their studio or even in your home. You can also hire a video production team to make your very own sex tape! Just remember to retain copyright on the material and prevent them from putting your images up on your site.

Q&A: Will Masturbation Affect Your Relationship?

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 21 Sep 2011 14:00:45 +0000

Masturbation is normal and healthy for both guys and gals – it’s a normal way to explore your sexuality as you go through puberty and teenage years, and then it becomes an excellent way to relieve sexual tension and stress when you can’t or don’t want to have sex with another person. It can also help you explore what you like and don’t like during sex, so you can more effectively communicate with your lovers about how you like to be touched. But can it affect a relationship and cause problems between two people? Can excessive masturbation ruin a partnership, or is it more likely due one partner having jealousy and control issues?

Hey Dan and Jenn – I’m 16 and my cousin tells me that masturbation makes you more likely to stay single and I don’t want to stay single! Is that true? Please help! Thanks and I love your show it has helped me so much.

–YouTube Viewer

Men And Women Learn About Their Sexuality Through Masturbation

Unfortunately, masturbation has a bad rap. Society teaches teens that masturbation is bad or wrong, and this gets even more oppressive in families where their morals or religious beliefs suggest that it is unhealthy. However, it is neither unhealthy nor is it wrong – it’s a natural way for both men and women to learn about their bodies and their developing sexuality. It’s a perfectly normal thing to engage in even daily from pre-teen years through adulthood.

It’s A Healthy Part Of Every Relationship

It’s unrealistic to expect that your partner be able to be around and available to satisfy your sexual needs whenever you have sexual needs. It’s also unfair to them – your partner should not be totally and completely responsible for your sexual satisfaction! Especially for men and women with high libidos, their partners may not want to have sex all day every day. Many women have issues with their male partners masturbating because they feel like he “wants” someone else sexually, or doesn’t like them for some reason. This couldn’t be further from the truth! It’s natural for guys to jerk off when they have a pang of desire, without having to ask their partners to have sex four times a day.

Another reason that masturbation can be beneficial to a relationship is that it teaches each person what they like sexually, so they can then go to their partners and communicate what feels good and what doesn’t. Being able to communicate to your partner what you like is essential to a satisfying and intimate sex life with your lover, because if YOU don’t know how to please yourself, how are THEY supposed to?

Mutual Masturbation

Mutual masturbation is also a fun activity to do together to become more comfortable with the idea of self satisfaction in your relationship and how it can help you both to relax, stay satisfied and learn what you like sexually. Doing it together can also add another element to your sex life that keeps it from getting boring and monotonous!

Jealousy Issues

Often, one partner will be jealous over the other for masturbating. They may be upset that their lover is watching porn, or they may feel like they’re not doing enough to please their partner. Rest assured that if your lover engages in self satisfaction and watches porn that it has nothing to do with your inadequacies as a lover. It simply is a natural, healthy thing to do! There’s no reason to be jealous about it.

How Much Is Too Much?

Of course, as with most things, there’s a caveat here. It can be damaging to a relationship if it goes too far. Normal self satisfaction usually doesn’t cause problems in a relationship, but if it becomes excessive, it can. If, for example, all you or your partner can think about is masturbating, you or your partner stop spending time together to go masturbate or you substitute it for sex with your partner. In this case, it can definitely be a problem in the relationship and you’ll want to seek help as soon as possible.

Just like with any addiction, if you or your partner are addicted to masturbating, seek help. Lots of addiction programs out there can be applied to masturbation and you can follow the same steps. If it’s taking over your life, you have an addiction and it’s time to do something about it! If it’s not, relax and don’t let it bother you. Normal masturbation is healthy and even beneficial for a relationship!

Top 10 Vibrators You HAVE To Try!

Kaylen Jackson — Sat, 10 Sep 2011 14:00:28 +0000

Sex toys are something every girl should have stashed away in her nightstand. Of course, ladies like a buzz, so here are ten “must try” vibrators!

The Wild G

A scary looking purple rabbit-style vibrator that really isn’t so scary once you get to know it. It’s made of soft jelly, slips in easily and has both a rotating shaft and an attachment for clitoral stimulation. Also, the rotating beads just near the base of the shaft feel surprisingly good. The only thing the Wild G doesn’t do is knock on the back door.

How To Use It: At home, by yourself, with the door locked! The Wild G doesn’t get too loud, but if someone decides to interrupt your party, it’s going to be pretty obvious that you weren’t taking a “nap.”

We-Vibe Touch

The We-Vibe Touch is a palm sized sex toy that is molded and grooved to fit both a woman’s hand and her clitoris. With a variety of vibe patterns that require just the touch of a button to activate (yes, 1 button!) this is quite possibly the easiest to use clitoral vibrator out there.

How To Use It: In the shower – this baby is 100% waterproof. It’s smooth, it’s cordless, it’s small and portable. It fits nicely in a shower caddy too. What more could you want for wet and wild masturbation?

G-Gasm Delight

Honestly, it’s the perfect g-spot stimulator. The G-Gasm Delight is made of hard plastic, so it’s well built for hard, squirting g-spot orgasms. It gets loud – especially when you turn it upside down – so make sure you’re covered as far as privacy goes.

How To Use It: Any way you like! This lovely vibrator also substitutes as a prostate massager, so you can use it on him too. This is probably one of the least likely sex toys out there you would think could be a couples’ toy!

Freestyle W by OhMiBod

Like other g-spot/clitoral vibrators, the Freestyle W by OhMiBod is designed to stimulate both the g-spot and the clitoris at the same time. However, this lovely toy has more to it than meets the eye. This guy is designed to hook up to your music player, and it will vibrate to the beat of the music.

How To Use It: With your iPod of course! Again, privacy is an issue here. If you get caught, you may end up showing off your toys’ cool features when they realize your mp3 player is hooked up to your vibrator.

Hitachi Magic Wand

An oldie but goodie. The Hitachi Magic Wand has been around for about 30 years and is marketed as a back massager. However, women who have used the wand know that there are many more good times to be had when using it as a clitoral vibrator than a back massager. This toy goes up to 6,000 rpm’s!

How To Use It: Alone, or with a partner. This actually makes a great couples’ toy for women who have trouble reaching orgasm during sex. He can finger her or penetrate her while she uses it on her clitoris so she can experience an orgasm with her partner.

We-Vibe II

The We-Vibe II is designed to be a couples’ sex toy. One end of the massager will slip inside the woman and rest against her g-spot, while the other end wraps up and around to the clitoris. While a woman can masturbate with the We-Vibe II, it is really designed to be worn during intercourse. It’s a great way for a woman to experience an orgasm with her partner during penetration if she usually can’t.

How To Use It: With your partner. Try it in a variety of sex positions to experiment with different levels of sensation!

Ogee Twistee G-Vibe

The Ogee Twistee G-Vibe is very like the We-Vibe II in that it can be molded to rest against both the g-spot and clitoris and worn during intercourse. However, unlike the We-Vibe II, this little guy can be twisted into other shapes as well! This is actually a great option for women who have a hard to reach g-spot or a tilted cervix.

How To Use It: With or without a partner. It’s such a versatile sex toy! Experiment with different shapes to find the one you like best. Bend it any way you like, but remember the best shapes because you’ll want to go back to those!

Lelo Mia

If you’re looking for a discreet vibrator, this is it! So tiny, the Lelo Mia looks like a tube of lipstick and fits right into your purse. It also charges via USB port, so you can charge it on the go on your computer or laptop. Just say it’s a jump drive. For busy women who want a clitoral vibe, this is your best bet. Classy and discreet, but with loads of naughty pleasure.

How To Use It: On a plane, in the car, in the bathroom at work – anywhere you want because this thing is quiet. It’s unlikely that unless you make a lot of noise, anyone will know that you’re having an orgasm. Even though it’s small, it’s powerful, so you may have a difficult time keeping your trap shut.

Eve’s Slim Pink Pleaser Vibrator

If you’re looking for a more traditional, dildo style vibrator, this is a great choice. It’s pretty, it’s somewhat flexible and the turn dial is super easy to use. A good choice for beginners, because it’s slim – only 1″ wide. It’s also fun for girls who are experienced with sex toys, because it just reaches those hot spots. Not super awesome at clitoral stimulation though.

How To Use It: This is yet another toy that is great to use alone or with your partner. Guys, you can use this during oral sex on her to stimulate her g-spot at the same time and try to give her a blended orgasm. Ladies, if you’re masturbating alone and need more clitoral stimulation than the Slim Pink Pleaser Vibrator provides, use it in conjunction with your favorite clitoris massager.

Lelo Elise

These are luxury vibrations at their finest. Like it’s cousin the Mia, the Lelo Elise is very quiet. It’s silky smooth and just feels luxurious in your hands and in your vagina. It’s designed for insertion and curved specifically for g-spot stimulation. It’s just one of those sex toys you have to have in your toy box.

How To Use It: You can use this with a partner, but it’s much more fun to keep this gorgeous vibrator to yourself. It’s like a decadent chocolate bar that you don’t want to share. Let it be your secret.

Q&A: MILF Fantasy – I Want To Have Sex With My Step-Mom!

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 08 Sep 2011 14:00:27 +0000

A MILF fantasy is actually quite common – there are many guys out there that either have or had a really hot step-mother who they couldn’t help but be attracted to! Of course it’s inappropriate, but lots of guys experience it. Most of the time, it passes and nothing more is ever said about it. But just what do you do when all you can think about is getting it on with your stepmother?

Question: I have a fantasy of having sex with my step mom. Almost every day she wears these pants that when she bends over you can see her ass perfectly, and my urges keep getting more and more frequent! I’ve gone to many other people, all with no help. She is also about to get breast implants, so that makes it all the worse! Your videos have helped me out a lot, so please help me on this one!

–YouTube Viewer

A MILF Fantasy Is Perfectly Normal

Boys, especially those going through puberty, are going to be attracted to random hot women, possibly all hot women. If your stepmother is hot, it’s not out of the ordinary that you would have a sexual fantasy about her! Lots of guys have gone through or are going through the same thing. You’re just attracted to a hot woman who just happens to be your step-mother. You don’t have to make it any more complicated than that.

Acting On Your Fantasy

While a MILF fantasy is actually very common, it’s not one that you can act on. Even if you’re over the age of eighteen and you and your step-mother are both consenting, you’re still going to hurt a lot of people if you make that decision. Your family would likely be very hurt and feel very betrayed if you and your step-mother got it on.

If you’re under age, that’s a whole different ball game – things could be much worse if you did anything about your fantasy. Also, it’s likely that your step-mother most absolutely does not share this fantasy, and you could damage your relationship with her and the rest of your family if you tell her that you think about her sexually.

You can’t help that you’re having this fantasy, so what do you do? If you end up masturbating every day while thinking about your step-mother, you’re not going to be the first guy that has ever done that. Masturbation is an excellent relief for fantasies that you just can’t be a part of in real life. However, if you actually act on your fantasy, you could be crossing a line that you can never un-cross.

Consider Counseling

If your MILF fantasy really bothers you and you just can’t get away from it (and you really want to) consider counseling. There’s nothing wrong with seeing an unbiased counselor or third party that can help you talk through your feelings and problems. People put so much stigma on going to a therapist – especially for sex related issues – but if you want to get to the root of the problem, therapy is about as good as it gets.

Don’t think that seeing a therapist automatically makes you a weaker guy. What counseling can do is help you talk through your issues and learn the tools you need to become a better person and live a happier, more fulfilled life. On a side note, talking to your step-mother about this fantasy of yours is probably not a good idea.

Redirect That Energy Elsewhere

If counseling isn’t something you can or want to do, think about ways you can redirect this energy. Think about what it is about your step-mother that turns you on so much. Is it her physique? Perhaps she has a nice butt or legs that just won’t quit. If you can isolate just what it is about her that turns you on, you can redirect that energy to adult films and magazines that feature women with large butts, long legs, or whatever it is that you think turns you on the most.

Even if you can’t find something in particular, there is surely going to be another girl you find attractive. Exploring magazines, websites, films and art can help you find other women to look at that also turn you on. If you’re old enough and dating is an option, get more social and talk to girls.

You may be attracted to your step-mother’s personality, simply because you haven’t been close or conversed much to other women. Dating can help you redirect your energy into finding a girl that you’re attracted to that you can get to know without the repercussions that getting involved with your step-mother would bring.

How To Have Sex Like A Teenager

Michael Webb — Wed, 07 Sep 2011 23:00:35 +0000

Sex when you’re young is unlike anything else out there – it’s incredible! Here’s how to bring those feelings back and have sex like you used to.

You remember your adolescent self, and I’m sure you wouldn’t want to go back to being him for anything. Walking around with a hard-on twenty four hours a day, surrounded by girls in mini-skirts who won’t even let you touch them under their bras, so you spend most of your time beating off as much as possible without your mom catching on to all the time you spend in the bathroom.

Trying Something New

Fast forward twenty five years. You have fumbled your way through losing your virginity, making a few mistakes, and getting married. You now have a beautiful wife that you still find sexy as ever, but between work and family duties, the time you have to spend making mad, passionate love has dwindled. You want to try something new, but all the stuff you find on the internet requires serious contortions, and you’re not sure your bum knee can take it.

Maybe it’s not something new you need. Maybe it’s something from before you learned how to unhook a bra without help. Being a walking hard on was horribly frustrating, but it wasn’t boring. There are a couple of things you may have forgotten about since girls started letting you put your penis in them.

The Make-Out Session

I’m sure you remember your first girlfriend. The two of you used to make out for hours on end – you trying to touch her breast, her slapping your hand away. The hours and hours of kissing had you in such a frenzy, you didn’t even notice when her dad walked in. However, ever since you’ve been allowed to have sex with women, this adolescent passion probably hasn’t been equaled. To add some passion, go back to this old stand by.

Make out, and make out for a really long time. But how do manage to keep from taking the prize if you’re already allowed? Trying making it a bet, and make sure the wager is worth it. For example, whoever touches below the belt first gets to pick TV on Monday. If you go there first, you’ll be watching Jon & Kate Plus 8 during Monday Night Football.

Mutual Masturbation

I’m sure you cringed at this term when your health teacher presented it as an alternative to sex (unless you were in high school in the last eight years and received abstinence-only education), but the grown up version of this can be fun. Whether you’re fully clothed on the couch or naked in your bed, mutual masturbation bring some playfulness back into sex.

You can get reacquainted with each other’s genitals – rediscover those spots that really make her lose her mind. If you orgasm, you don’t have to have intercourse. Penetration is not a necessity every time you have sex. You’re a grown up now, so you can forget all those silly rules you used to make about what defines sex (“It was just a handjob! We didn’t even do anything!”). You can go ahead and make your own.

What Women Who Can Have Multiple Orgasms Won’t Tell You

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 06 Sep 2011 14:00:12 +0000

Multiple orgasms can be had, but only if a girl really knows how to let go. Here’s what girls who can have more than one orgasm know that you don’t!

They Have Self Confidence

Self confidence is a must when it comes to having multiple orgasms and you might could even say the same about just one orgasm. A girl who has multiple orgasms is very self confident – she knows she’s sexy, she knows you like what you see and she knows how to let go. She’s not worried about her cellulite during sex, and she’s most certainly not worried about her O-face, because she knows you want to see it, regardless of what it looks like.

If a girl is self conscious, she’s not going to be able to fully release herself during sex and let go of her inhibitions. Her thoughts will be consumed with whether she looks good naked or not, whether her partner likes the way she tastes and smells, and so on and so forth. Since her thoughts are consumed with all these things instead of enjoying sex, she’s not going to be able to have more than one orgasm, if she’s able to have one at all!

They Know What An Actual Multiple Orgasm Is

There are two different types of multiple orgasms. “Sequential” orgasms happen within minutes of each other, and require at least a few minutes of cool down and relaxation in between. “Serial” orgasms are actually much closer together, and sometimes a woman can barely tell that there is more than one climax happening – it may very well feel like one big, long orgasm to her.

Girls that can have more than one climax during a single sex session know that it’s not some proverbial Mt. Everest that must be climbed and only a few girls can actually do it. Instead, they understand their bodies and that every woman is capable of having more than one climax!

They Masturbate

A girl is never going to have multiple orgasms if she doesn’t know how to “click her own mouse.” Some girls have been taught from a young age that masturbation is wrong and shameful (for both guys and gals), and that’s a difficult stigma to break even well into adulthood. However, if a girl wants to learn how to have double the climaxes during sex, she’s going to have to make it happen herself first.

Masturbation teaches a woman to relax and fully experience sexual pleasure. This is because she’s alone, so she’s automatically not worried about what she looks like, her body or anything else in that moment in time. If a girl masturbates regularly, not only will she know exactly where her own hot spots are and how to push her own buttons, she’ll also learn how to let go.

Letting go is probably the most challenging aspect of having an orgasm at all for a girl, especially if she has been conditioned in any way that masturbation is wrong or that sex is a “wife’s duty” and is only supposed to be pleasurable for him.

The Right Time And Place

A girl who can have multiple orgasms knows that the timing and placement of sex makes a huge difference as to whether or not she’s going to be able to reach orgasm. If she’s sneaking off to have a quickie while the kids are preoccupied, she probably won’t be able to climax. However, if the kids are at Grandma’s and she’s all alone (or with a partner) after some time to wind down from the day and a glass or two of wine, she’ll probably be able to have more than one earth shattering orgasm.

Many people think that renting a hotel room when you don’t “have” to seems silly, but you have no idea how much the change in venue makes a difference. Even if your house is just down the road, “getting away from it all” even for just a night can help a girl relax more than you could possibly imagine.

They Use Lube

Lube isn’t something that older women use when they’re “dry.” For great climaxes, you’ve got to have lube! Things need to be really slippery – too much friction, and she’ll never reach orgasm. A girl who is a master at multiple orgasms may have a few bottles of lube hanging around – perhaps a silicone formula for fun in the water, and a good old fashioned water based lube for every day action. She may even have a special sex toy lube specifically for masturbation!

Invest in a good bottle of lube if you don’t have any. The misconception that lube is something that is needed when a girl can’t get wet, but that’s just the thing – it’s a misconception. Lube makes everything better!

Sex Is A Journey, Not A Means To An End

For a girl that can have multiple orgasms, sex isn’t all about just getting to the big “O” like it is for guys. It’s about the journey and the experience! She may take it slow, speed up, slow down again and just enjoy the ride. She won’t force herself to have an orgasm and if it doesn’t happen, it doesn’t happen.

The mere lifting of the pressure to climax during sex actually opens the door to have more climaxes, believe it or not. By simply giving up the “need” to reach orgasm during sex, a woman will most likely experience an incredible orgasm – if not more than one!

Sex Machines – Do Women Even Need Men Anymore?

Kaylen Jackson — Thu, 01 Sep 2011 14:00:40 +0000

Sex machines have clitoral vibrators, dildos and even anal attachments – way more than any guy has in his “tool box.” Even if a guy has a huge penis, he still doesn’t vibrate, does he? So do girls even need guys for sex?

What Are Sex Machines?

Sex machines are often seen in porn – especially fetish porn or other types of specialized porn. They are machines designed to simulate intercourse, penetration, oral sex and more, often at much higher speeds than can be achieved through traditional sexual intercourse or oral sex. The most popular speed is about 160 strokes per minute, but many models can do up to 300 strokes per minute without ever breaking a sweat.

There are many different varieties of sex machine, ranging from those simple in design to ones that have an attachment that stimulates almost every hot spot imaginable. Some of the more unique sex machines are:

A custom designed model that simulates the licking of a clitoris with molded silicone tongues that are attached to a chainsaw
Models for double penetration
Models with attachments that spray water on the clitoris and penetrates the vagina at the same time
A vacuum powered clitoris pump or nipple stimulator
A spanking machine
Models that are designed to penetrate two women at once

What Can Sex Machines Do?

The majority of sex machines are going to be seen in porn, used by women who are alone and masturbating. They have a variety of uses, however. They can be used by a woman for female masturbation, or by men with a male masturbator attachment. They can be used for anal sex, clitoral orgasms, nipple play and even spanking and restraining. There are many different models of sex machines out there, so whatever you like, you’ll probably be able to find a machine that does it for you.

Sex machines can also be used by couples that desire more in their sex life than just what trying different sex positions and other things to spice up sex can offer. Men who entertain a cuckold fantasy will definitely love watching their wives get banged by a mechanical dildo, while women may enjoy watching their partners be slowly pleased with a soft and squishy masturbator.

Are They Really Better Than Sex?

Orgasms with sex machines are often harder and much more intense than an orgasm that is experienced during sex with a partner. Women who have never experienced an orgasm can have one with a sex machine, and women who have never experienced female ejaculation will often squirt during sex with a machine without even knowing they can. This is because:

Sex machines offer intense speeds that no human could possibly replicate
They offer steady stimulation at the same speed, which for a woman, is necessary for orgasm
They are designed specifically for firm g-spot stimulation, which can cause squirting
They never get tired and they’re always around when you want them
They offer just about any type of stimulation that you want
Creative folks, mechanics and those good with their hands can often create their own sex machines that are designed specifically for their pleasure

Nothing Can Replace A Partner’s Intimacy

While sex machines can really deliver when it comes to the physical stimulation department, that’s not always what guys and gals are looking for when it comes to sex and lovemaking. Women who enjoy a fast and hard orgasm during masturbation with a sex machine are still going to need that emotional intimacy that only a partner can give.

Sex machines can’t give hugs, tell a woman she’s beautiful or take her out to dinner. They can’t look into the eyes of their man while they give them a slow, deep blowjob and they can’t touch and kiss softly during foreplay. While sex machines do have a lot to offer, they lack the critical emotional and physical intimacy that comes from real sex with a real, live partner.

Should You Get A Sex Machine?

They are fairly expensive, especially if you choose to get the kind of high quality models that you see in porn films. However, if you have the space and privacy at home for one, they can be a fun investment for masturbation and erotic play with your lover.

Safety Tip

Never try to turn a nail gun, a drill, a saw or a chainsaw into a homemade sex toy. If something goes wrong – like the saw cuts through the dildo you shoved on it – you can really hurt yourself or someone else. Only use sex machines you’ve purchased from a reputable company and follow all recommended safety guidelines.

Mutual Masturbation – How To Get Your Partner To Try It

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 26 Aug 2011 14:00:37 +0000

Mutual masturbation can be something fun and exciting to add to your sex life. Masturbation doesn’t have to be something you hide from your significant other, or that you do in the dark in secret. You can enjoy masturbating with your lover, while watching them do it too. Sound like fun? Here’s how to get your lover into it!

What Is Mutual Masturbation?

To put it simply, it’s when you masturbate yourself in front of your lover and they masturbate themselves in front of you. It can be at the same time, but it doesn’t have to be. You can also take turns putting on a great show for each other – but most people who do this usually end up getting so turned on that they start touching themselves anyway.

Most couples are too shy to try this – in fact, most people are too shy to talk about masturbation in general – but it can be a great way to bond sexually with your partner. You can bond emotionally by watching each other give themselves pleasure, and you can also pick up some great tips on where they like to be touched and how they like to be stroked.

Get Comfortable With The Topic

First of all, if you’re uncomfortable with the topic of self love in general, it’s time to pony up and get comfortable with it. Rest assured, everyone does it – men and women alike. Although our society places taboos on masturbation (heck, some people even say that it makes you go blind or makes hair grow on the palms of your hands), there’s really nothing wrong with it and it’s a perfectly normal and healthy thing for both men and women to do. Educate yourself about masturbation and get over your preconceived notions that it’s “bad” or “wrong.”

Encourage Your Partner To Do It

Before you jump right in to mutual masturbation, you have to get your partner comfortable with it too. Too often, couples masturbate in secret without ever talking about it with each other. It doesn’t have to be that way! It’s not something to be jealous of, so encourage your partner to masturbate in addition to a healthy sex life with you. Get them a sex toy to enjoy on their own – there are tons of great sex toys for both girls and guys! Don’t think that the sex toy world is limited to vibrators for women. There is so much more out there! Explore some online sex toy stores – if you get the right ones, your lover may find them intriguing enough to try!

Make sure you give them plenty of privacy and time alone to enjoy their masturbation. Honor their privacy and don’t ever bust in on them if you know or suspect they’re masturbating. If the door is closed, knock!

Talk About It With Your Significant Other

If you and your significant other have never had the “masturbation” talk, go ahead and have it! Share stories with each other about your first time doing it or if you ever got caught doing it. Talk about how it’s normal and natural, and let your lover know that you’re not going to judge them at all for their masturbation habits or what they enjoy. Share with your lover what you enjoy and what your fantasies are – take that leap and tell them what you like when you get it on with yourself and they may be more encouraged to share what they like with you!

Your First Time With Mutual Masturbation

You’ve gotten past the “masturbation conversation” and you and your lover are both comfortable talking about it and doing it. You feel ready to take the next step and try doing it in front of each other. For your first time, consider blindfolding your lover. This can be fun, but it also serves a purpose – your lover is going to feel more comfortable masturbating in front of you for the first time if they can’t see you’re there. You can watch them, but they can’t see you! Alternatively, you may feel more comfortable wearing a blindfold for the first time masturbating in front of your lover.

Another great idea is to turn the lights down very low, or use candles. The dim lighting makes it more comfortable for both of you, but still allows you both to see what is going on, which can be incredibly erotic.

Make Your Significant Other Feel Good About It

Don’t be shy when your lover is putting on the show – let them know how much you like it and how much it turns you on! This can be in the form of just vocalizing your pleasure or even dirty talk, which can make it even more erotic for them. Touch yourself while they’re masturbating, so they can see just how turned on you are at the sight of them masturbating. If you want to get your lover to do it more often, you’ve got to give them positive feedback. Don’t be the freak that just sits in the corner staring – get into it! Let your lover know that you’re into it! Enjoy it and have fun with it.

Getting Into A Groove

You’ve tried mutual masturbation for the first time and you really like it – so how do you take it a step further? Try different sex positions when you do – sitting in front of each other is nice, but you can also try lying down, or with one of you lying in the bed and the other sitting in a chair. Use your imagination and consider different possibilities and different ways to try it.

Auto Cunnilingus – Can Women Lick Their Own Clitoris?

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 18 Aug 2011 14:00:58 +0000

Auto cunnilingus is where women bend forward enough to give themselves oral sex – but can they really do this? You’ve seen contortionists on television and in movies bend ways you didn’t even imagine they could, but can flexible women actually go down on themselves? Is it even possible?

What Is Auto Cunnilingus?

Auto cunnilingus is the act of a woman bending forward far enough to reach their tongue to their clitoris and licking it as a form of female masturbation. It sounds difficult to do – and it is! Very few women are able to do this! Some men can give themselves oral sex too – this is called auto fellatio. With auto fellatio, a man will bend forward far enough to suck on his own penis. Very rarely if ever is a man who can do this able to actually give himself a full on blowjob. What usually happens is the man sucks on the head of his penis while he masturbates the shaft with his hand.

It is much harder for women to give themselves oral sex, simply because they have to bend down a lot farther to reach their own clitoris. While you won’t see many people engaging in self oral sex, you’ll see that there are far less women who are able to do it than men who can.

Can A Woman Really Stretch That Far?

While it is possible for a woman to be flexible enough to bend far enough forward that she can reach her vagina with her mouth, it is very rare indeed. Very few women can actually do this and if they can, it’s usually because they’ve had some sort of gymnastics training and have had lots of practice with flexibility or are a contortionist, who bend their bodies to extreme angles for entertainment.

Women who can give themselves auto cunnilingus can usually only go down on themselves for a few seconds, possibly up to a minute or two. Certainly not long enough to give themselves an orgasm without additional masturbation with their fingers or a sex toy.

The most common sex position for auto cunnilingus is lying on the back with the hands under the buttocks. The woman can lean her neck and head forward, while using her arms to push her bottom towards her head. Also, a woman may find it easier if she has someone to help her with bending. It may be easier for her to relax her body and focus on reaching the clitoris while a partner sits behind her and gently pushes her bottom forward.

Can Women Learn To Be That Flexible?

It’s possible for women who aren’t able to lick their own clitoris to learn how to do it, but it requires some real motivation. Generally, it’s not something that you can try once or twice and be able to do – it takes years of practice to be able to train your body to be that flexible. It’s not easy, and it’s not going to happen quickly. You generally have to be fit to begin with, and training your body to stretch that much takes time and patience. Even contortionists and trained gymnasts have to work very hard to be able to stretch that much.

If you’d like to learn how to stretch like that, take it slow. Start with small stretches and work your way up. Don’t push yourself too hard – you could really end up hurting yourself! Take your time – since this isn’t something that is going to happen right away, it’s important that it’s something you really want to be able to do.

A Word Of Caution

Bending the body to such extreme angles like with auto cunnilingus can be dangerous. Most people’s bodies are not designed to stretch that much or contort into those types of extreme positions. While trained gymnasts, extremely flexible people and contortionists may be able to get into these types of positions without hurting themselves, it’s likely that your average gal trying to do this may end up with a sprain or a stretched or torn ligament.

Before you attempt to try giving yourself oral sex, make sure that you are well aware that you can do some serious damage to your muscles, joints and tendons if you’re not careful. Make sure you’re fit and healthy enough to try and if it hurts a lot, stop!

Male Sex Toys – 5 Things That AREN’T For Her!

Kaylen Jackson — Fri, 12 Aug 2011 14:00:56 +0000

Male sex toys are becoming more and more popular as guys realize that they’re not only for women. Men can have just as much fun during masturbation as a woman can! Here are some must have male sex toys!

A Masturbation Sleeve

Every guy needs one of these! Forget masturbating with your hand – these soft jelly or skin-like sleeves are specifically designed to maximize a man’s pleasure during masturbation. Male sex toys just don’t get any better than this – there are hundreds of different materials, sizes and looks to choose from, so it’s not at all difficult to find one that you really enjoy. Men who use masturbation sleeves report better, deeper orgasms and more overall satisfaction.

Also, keep in mind that to use a masturbation sleeve, you need a bottle of lube hanging around. Most lube will work, but pay attention and don’t use silicone lubes with silicone sleeves, or oil based lubes with latex sleeves. A good, water based lubricant will work with any material.

A Cock Ring

Most guys don’t think about using a cock ring during masturbation, but it can make a world of difference! Cock rings aren’t just for guys who have erectile dysfunction and can’t keep it up, nor are they just for couples who like a vibrating bullet in between them. A soft jelly cock ring can just feel great during masturbation, while a stiffer one can prolong a man’s erection and make his orgasm absolutely incredible.

A Prostate Stimulator

You may have heard that the best male orgasm comes from massaging the prostate gland – however, many guys are still too shy to try anal stimulation. If you can get past the “ick” factor that many men have when thinking about playing with the anus during masturbation, you can have a lot of fun and even more pleasure.

A good drawer full of male sex toys isn’t complete without a prostate stimulator. If you’re new to it, or are still a little creeped out by it but want to achieve that amazing orgasm that everyone is always talking about, try starting with a smaller prostate stimulator. A tiny butt plug will get you used to anal play during masturbation, and as you get more and more into it, you can replace your beginner’s sex toys with more advanced ones.

A Penis Pump

Penis pumps are also not male sex toys that are confined to men that struggle with erectile dysfunction. Any man can enjoy a penis pump, especially if he wants to mimic the sucking feeling produced during oral sex or if he just wants a bigger, harder erection. Penis pumps are often inexpensive, and you can even get pumping models that have a soft jelly or skin-like “masturbation sleeve” attachment.

Be careful when using a penis pump, and never, ever use a vacuum cleaner instead of a pump made specifically for sex. If you pump too hard, you can cause bruising or pain and discomfort. Not worth it! But when used correctly before or during your masturbation session, you can experience more pleasure with a bigger, longer and harder penis.

A Masturbator Mount

If you really want masturbation to feel like a vagina, try purchasing a masturbator mount. Some mounts may only be compatible with some brands of masturbation sleeves, while other types of sleeves cannot be mounted at all. If you’re looking into a mount, make sure you choose one that is compatible with the masturbation sleeve that you already have or are willing to purchase a new one.

A masturbator mount will hold the masturbation sleeve for you, so you can enjoy it absolutely hands free. There are different styles of mounts depending on which sex position you enjoy most – and you can pick the one you like instead of trying to find one that you and someone else will enjoy!

You will love the hands free action that a mount can provide, because it makes it feel even more like sex. Even with a masturbation sleeve, there’s something about doing it with your hands that makes it feel not as good as the real thing (probably because it isn’t the real thing). However, with a mount, you can trick your brain into thinking you’re actually doing the dirty, especially if you close your eyes or have your favorite porn playing on the television in front of you. Just don’t forget to lock the doors!

Mutual Masturbation: How To Get Your Man To Try It

Kaylen Jackson — Wed, 10 Aug 2011 14:00:07 +0000

Mutual masturbation can be super fun, but it can be difficult to get a guy into it. Of course, guys love watching a woman masturbate, but a surprising amount of guys are actually too shy to do the same in front of their girl. If you want to try mutual masturbation, here’s how you can get him interested.

Why Isn’t He Jumping At The Chance?

You’d think that the majority of guys would actually be jumping at the chance to not only watch their girl masturbate, but to masturbate with her. While some guys are confident enough to be able to do this, many of them aren’t. Why?

He’s Afraid Of You Seeing His Porn

A lot of guys are too shy to try mutual masturbation because they think they need porn to masturbate – and they’re afraid of you seeing it. Many men watch porn that they would never in a million years want their partners to see. Whether it’s fetish porn that he thinks his partner would be appalled by, or he just doesn’t want to hurt her feelings (because in most guys’ experiences, women are bothered by their men looking at porn). Either way, he may be too shy to try mutual masturbation simply because he doesn’t want to turn on his porn in front of you.

He’s Been Busted Too Many Times For Masturbation

Unfortunately, there are lots of women that think that if a guy is sexually satisfied in his relationship, that he won’t need to masturbate. This couldn’t be farther from the truth! It’s normal and healthy for a man to masturbate – and even watch porn – if he’s in a sexually satisfying relationship. In fact, it’s healthy for women too.

He may also feel shame over masturbation, especially if he grew up being taught that masturbation was wrong or sinful. Not that he doesn’t do it – he does. But he may do it quickly to “get it over with” and may not see it as something pleasurable or even enjoyable, just something that “has to be done.”

Make Him Feel Comfortable With It In General

If the idea of mutual masturbation seems to make him uncomfortable, it could be due to harbored feelings about masturbation. Encourage him to enjoy his self-love. Get him a masturbation sleeve as a gift, and make sure it’s in an easy to get to place with a bottle of lube. Leave him alone in the house for long enough periods of time that he can do it without fear of being interrupted. If you catch him, politely excuse yourself and allow him to continue if he wants.

Also, talk to him about it. Let him know that you do it, and don’t be afraid to let him catch you getting your self love on too. Don’t act ashamed about it and over time, he will learn not to be ashamed as well.

Try Watching Porn With Mutual Masturbation

While just watching you do yourself may be enough visual stimulation to get him off, watching a porn flick with him while you do might help him get even more into it. However, don’t suggest that he pick it out or that he use any of the videos or pictures that he does when he’s alone. Instead, choose a naughty film together. Select one neither of you have ever seen before, or select one and surprise him with it. Ask him if he’d like to watch it, or just put it on loud enough for him to hear it and see what happens!

Let Him Watch You First

Start by letting him watch you first, before you ask him to engage in mutual masturbation. Go slow at first, and give him time to ogle you and really get turned on. Let him watch you touch your clitoris, or use a sex toy on yourself to stimulate your g-spot. Show no inhibitions – spread your legs wide and let him see every bit of what you’re doing. Chances are, with a combination of sexy moves and confidence, he won’t be able to help but touch himself!

Give Him A Great Handjob And Encourage Him To Take Over

You can also nudge him towards mutual masturbation by giving him a great handjob. Make sure you have your sex toy nearby too, and settle in to give him a great handjob. Use lube and start slow, building speed until he’s incredibly turned on. When he’s closer to orgasm (but not too close), replace your hand with his and whisper to him that you’d like to see him do it himself. He’ll most likely happily oblige.

However, you can also get him close to orgasm and then stop, proceeding to touch yourself or use your sex toy. Chances are, he’s not going to be able to stop himself from masturbating while watching you!

Q&A: I Can Only Orgasm Through Anal Masturbation! Please Help!

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 06 Aug 2011 14:00:39 +0000

Anal sex can produce intense orgasms – there are tons of nerves back there that produce pleasurable sensations when stimulated. The prostate gland in particular will produce what some men say are the most intense orgasms a man can ever experience. Having a climax through anal sex can be a fun addition to regular orgasms, but what do you do if going through the back door is the only way you can get off?

Question: I have a very serious question. My friend can only come when he anally masturbates – he can no longer come just using his penis. Can you explain this?

–YouTube Viewer

What Is An Anal Orgasm?

An orgasm through anal sex is due to stimulation of the prostate gland in men. It is possible for women to have an anal orgasm as well, but it is much more common in guys. When the prostate gland is stimulated through penetration of the anus, it can produce intense, deeply pleasurable sensations. Often, this will contribute to a powerful orgasm or cause one in and of itself. Usually, you have to stimulate the penis as well, but in some cases, an orgasm can happen through anal stimulation alone.

It’s Easy To Get Stuck In An “Orgasm Rut”

When you masturbate, it’s easy for both men and women to get stuck in an “orgasm rut.” In women, this is usually due to the use of a vibrator. A woman gets used to using a vibrator may have difficulty reaching climax during sex or fingering, and a man who almost always uses anal stimulation to get himself off during masturbation may notice that he is unable to climax without it.

It’s easy to get yourself into a habit of masturbating a certain way, and it may seem impossible to break that habit. Anal orgasms in particular are very powerful, and you can definitely get “addicted” to the intense rush that an orgasm like that can give you. It may not feel as pleasurable to you to masturbate any other way.

Is The Situation Permanent?

It may be common for people to get stuck only being able to reach orgasm in one way, but does that mean that the situation will last forever? Will you ever be able to masturbate or have sex and reach climax again without anal stimulation?

Yes. It may be a difficult habit to break and it’s certainly not going to happen overnight – but it IS possible to train yourself to reach climax in other ways. You’re not going to be able to break the habit if you continue to use anal stimulation with masturbation – you actually have to give it up for awhile and re-teach yourself to climax through regular masturbation or sexual intercourse.

It is unlikely that you will be able to reach climax on the first try if you’re not using anal sex toys. You may, but give yourself plenty of time to get warmed up and tease yourself. Set aside a good chunk of time, lock the doors and turn off your phone. Resist the temptation to just do it the same way you did before – find new ways to pleasure yourself. If you stick with it, you’ll eventually train yourself to be able to climax without anal penetration. Once you do that, you’ll find that you can reach climax both ways!

If You Just Can’t Do It

It’s unlikely that with time, dedication and persistence that you can train yourself to orgasm with many different forms of stimulation. However, if you try it and you just don’t have the patience to stick with it, relax. Just let it go and have fun with it! There’s nothing wrong with wanting or needing anal stimulation to reach climax. If it’s pleasurable and not hurting you or doing damage in any way, there’s really no reason to stress out about having to “quit.”

Sex and masturbation is all about having fun and giving yourself pleasure. Many people, especially men, may not want to admit that they masturbate anally. They may want to try to find other ways to reach climax because they feel embarrassed about wanting or needing to masturbate with anal sex toys. There’s no reason to feel ashamed about it – everyone likes different things during sex and no two people’s sexual preferences are exactly the same. If you just can’t seem to do without it, don’t stress over it. Relax, have fun and enjoy your orgasm!

Q&A: Fingering – What To Do When It Hurts

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 29 Jul 2011 14:00:21 +0000

Fingering should be pleasurable, not painful! There are lots of things that can cause a woman to feel pain when she’s being fingered, either during masturbation or as part of foreplay with her partner. Here’s what to do when fingering hurts!

Question: Hi Dan and Jennifer – I have a problem! Each time I put my finger into my girlfriend’s vagina, she says that it hurts – but it is only one finger and I want to give her a vaginal orgasm! All along I have been giving her a clitoral orgasm. I have my fingernails cut properly and I think one time I accidentally cut her vaginal wall to a point where it bled a little…does that affect anything? I really need help because I want her to feel good!

–YouTube Viewer

Common Reasons Fingering Can Hurt

There are many reasons that fingering can hurt – and it may be just one reason, or it may be many factors that contribute to pain during this activity.

Lack Of Proper Lubrication

The most common reason that fingering is uncomfortable or painful for a woman is if she’s not lubricated enough down there. Many people assume that if she’s turned on, she’ll be wet enough down there, while other people assume that spit is a good enough lube. If you really want to avoid pain during this activity, you’re going to want to use a good, water based lubricant and plenty of it. The more, the better!

If she’s not lubed up enough before you insert your finger into her vagina, it can be difficult for it to go in, and it can cause a lot of friction against the walls of her vagina. The vaginal tissues are very delicate and can tear or bleed if there’s too much friction without enough lubrication. Lube is inexpensive and can be purchased almost anywhere. There’s no reason not to use it!

Fingernails

If your fingernails aren’t cut or trimmed down well enough, or if you have hangnails, these can cut or tear the vaginal tissues inside. This is painful and may even cause bleeding! Take the time to trim your fingernails and cuticles, or if you don’t know how to do it yourself, man up and go get a manicure! Another option, especially for men who work with their hands and have rough calluses on their fingers, try wearing a condom or latex or vinyl glove when you finger your partner. This makes it go in and out smoothly, and you’re guaranteed not to hurt her.

Yeast Or Bacterial Infections

A lot of people don’t want to think about it, but a woman who experiences pain during fingering or intercourse may have a bacterial or yeast infection. Yeast and bacterial infections are common, and it simply happens when either the pH level in the vagina is out of whack or bacteria is introduced. In fact, you may have given her a bacterial infection if there was dirt and bacteria under your nails the last time you put your fingers in her vagina!

Chemicals On The Skin

It is so, so, so important to wash your hands before touching your partner’s vagina! Even if you’re only touching the clitoris or the labia – make sure your hands are clean first! Chemicals or substances on the hands can cause pain during fingering, especially if you’ve just dug into a basket of hot wings. Don’t assume that just because your hands look clean that they are – wash up with soap and hot water and your lady will thank you tremendously!

She May Not Be Aroused Enough

A woman has to be fully aroused before any down-there action can feel good. If you try fingering before she’s ready, she’s going to tighten her muscles and she’s not going to be relaxed enough for you to get your finger all the way inside. Coupled with not being lubed up enough, this scenario can be disastrous! Spend some time kissing her and engaging in foreplay before you actually make the move to start fingering her. Making sure that she’s aroused and practically begging you to do it will keep it from hurting her as much.

Using Too Many Fingers Too Fast

A lot of guys think that they can start fingering their partner with three fingers – and this is not the case! Starting with too many fingers or pushing too hard or too fast before she’s really ready for that level of action can cause extreme discomfort and pain. Start with one finger and work your way up as she gets more and more aroused.

How To Make Fingering More Pleasurable For Her

There are many ways to make sure that fingering is pleasurable for her. In fact, before you start trying to learn specific techniques to give her an orgasm, check out these basic tips to make sure you’re not hurting her.

Go slow and use lots of lube.
Start with one finger at a time and slowly work your way up to more if she seems into it.
Pay attention to her cues – she will let you know if it’s uncomfortable or not with her body language.
Can she finger herself without pain? If not, the issue may be bigger than you.
Try fingering in combination with oral sex. Start by licking her clitoris and when she’s aroused, slowly begin to use your finger.

When To Get Her Checked Out

If fingering always hurts, lube stings and she’s not even able to finger herself, there may be something going on down there that needs a doctor’s diagnosis. Infections will cause almost anything to be painful down there, even urination. Communicate with her about what hurts and why it hurts, and if she needs to go to the doctor, offer to go with her without passing judgement. Eliminating all the possible causes of pain during fingering is the best way to get to the root of the problem – and get rid of it!

5 Tricks To Lasting All Night Long

Isabella Stone — Fri, 22 Jul 2011 23:00:17 +0000

Premature ejaculation affects a lot of guys. Tell me if this scenario sounds familiar: you’re in bed with a girl, you’re both enjoying yourselves, and you’re about to wow her with your next move when wham! You finish early. Your girl smiles and mumbles something, and you feel like a sexual failure.

This scene is all too common, but it thankfully can be avoided next time with just a few tweaks. Use the following tips next time you feel the need to push off that inevitable moment, and last all night.

Distract Yourself

Forget the usual advice to “think about baseball.” Or Margaret Thatcher naked. You don’t want to be scared off sex forever! It may seem counter-intuitive, but the best thing to distract yourself with is how sex feels, looks, even smells and tastes.

Instead of mindlessly pumping away toward the Big O, pay attention to other things, like how soft your partner’s skin is, the curve of her neck, or the pain of her nails dragging down your back. Notice the smell of her skin and the wetness between her thighs. When you become mindful, you can last longer and enjoy the sexual experience more. What could be better than that?

Concentrate On Her Pleasure

Instead of focusing on yourself, make it all about her. Choose positions that feel best for her (trust me, she’ll let you know when you’ve hit the right spot). Pay attention to her body’s cues, and you won’t be so hung up on your own.

Women are all about foreplay, so if you can make the foreplay last a long time it won’t matter if you finish shortly after the actual sex starts because in her head it started long before the actual penetration. Once she’s had a few orgasms, keep going, and try to get a new personal “high score.” Remember, a high percentage of women are multi-orgasmic, so challenge yourself to give her more than last time! Making the experience better for her is going to not only improve your stamina but will also improve your sexual reputation.

Change Sex Positions

This is the single easiest thing you can do to avoid premature ejaculation. If you feel yourself getting a bit too heated in one position, move to a completely different one. If you are in doggy style, move to missionary. The trick is to really change it up-moving from one variation of doggie to another isn’t going to cut it. Be careful not to change sex positions too frequently, as it is going to take her out of the mood and feel more like a distraction than anything else.

Wear A Condom

First of all, you should be practicing safe sex anyway, and for most of you, that means wearing a condom. However, if you are in a long term relationship, or you’ve both been tested and she’s on the pill, condoms might not seem like a necessity. If you’re having trouble lasting, though, that little prophylactic can be a lifesaver. We all know that condoms can dull sensation? In this case, a little dulling is exactly what you need. There are plenty of good brands out there now that feel almost like you’re not wearing anything, except that little extra something can keep you lasting much longer.

Change Your Masturbation Habits

If I were to tell you to stop masturbating altogether, and you were to actually listen, your next sexual encounter would probably be record for shortest time between start and finish. I won’t tell you to stop the self-love! I will, however, let you in on a secret. When you are young and just discovering masturbation, you tend to do it fast and furiously, which made sense back then because you were trying not to get caught. Nowadays you hopefully have more leisure but probably still use the vice-grip, carpal-tunnel inducing, furious shake technique you used at 14. Stop it!

Use your self-love time to retrain your body to sustain an erection. Use the start-stop technique of backing off when you feel an orgasm coming on. Doing that a few times will not only train your penis to stay hard without cumming, it will also make the inevitable payoff mind-blowingly better than your normal orgasm.

This technique also translates well to the bedroom. Slow down every time you’re on the verge and by the time you do climax the release will be incredible.

Being an amazing lover isn’t all about lasting longer in bed, but using these tricks to make yourself last longer can have the effect of making you a better lover. With just a few simple tweaks to your technique, you can improve your stamina, keep going all night long, and make yourself seem like a sex god in her eyes. It’s a win-win for both of you.

Women’s Masturbation Secrets – REVEALED!

Michael Webb — Thu, 21 Jul 2011 23:00:15 +0000

I have some shocking news. Girls like to masturbate. Of course they do, masturbation is really fun! They masturbate far more than you give them credit for. In fact, for a shockingly large amount of women, that is the only way they can achieve orgasm. While you’re aimlessly poking around down below, she’s thinking, “Whatever, just fake it so he’ll stop. I can take care of myself later.” This is not because of your inadequacies as a lover, nor is it unfixable. It’s simply a lack of understanding how her body works.

Men and women experience sex in very differently. For men it’s relatively easy: see woman, want to have sex with woman, hopefully penis will touch woman. Obviously that is an oversimplification, but, compared to the woman’s experience, that’s all it is. If you develop a better understanding of how women satisfy themselves, perhaps it would seem less complicated.

She Creates A Mood

In order to achieve orgasm, a woman needs the right atmosphere. She doesn’t light candles and get out the satin sheets every time she masturbates; she just needs to feel comfortable. If not, she can’t concentrate on the task at hand, so to speak. If she is too cold or too exposed or too anything that distracts her pleasure, it’s not going to happen. That sounds daunting, but finding the right ambient balance isn’t too difficult if her mind is calm. Plus, extreme horniness will always overtake any environmental distractions.

She Sets A Pace

Regardless of the method, a woman fingers herself rhythmically. Meaning, there is an even flow of strokes and caresses, allowing her to concentrate on the sensations each touch gives. A choppy technique can be distraction. Whereas a man responds to physical stimulation alone, a woman puts herself into an almost meditative state. Otherwise, no amount of touching will induce orgasm. Again, this sounds quite complicated to men, but a woman does know how to adjust her focus in different situations.

She Has A Specific Technique

All women have that one sure-fire orgasm making technique. This is not to say that a woman has only one way of satisfying herself, but she does have a method that guarantees her orgasm. I know that you are hoping that I’m about to tell you what it is, but I’m not. It is as diverse as ladies themselves. Some women like direct manual stimulation of the head of the clitoris, but some ladies are far too sensitive and require indirect stimulation. There are even girls who can get off just by rubbing their inner thighs. Whatever her technique, find out what it is, and learn to employ it in given situations.

She Uses A Vibrator

Many girls start out using their fingers during masturbation, but it doesn’t take long for them to graduate to sex toys when they get older. Once a woman tries a vibrator, there’s often no going back – simply because a vibrator offers pleasure whenever she wants it and can make her orgasm fast and hard. Girls are busy ladies after all, and they don’t always have time to sit around and finger themselves for an hour until they reach climax. Instead, using a vibrator can help her get things done quickly, with just as much – if not more – pleasure than if she used her hands alone.

She Reads Erotic Novels

Men look at porn when they masturbate, but women don’t respond to visual stimuli the way men do. They prefer to use their imaginations to think about sex and different sexual scenarios that turn them on. Sometimes, women can do this on their own without any help at all, but other times, she may enjoy reading a romantic or erotic novel before she masturbates or while she’s doing it. Girls love using erotic novels for masturbation because it really gets their biggest sexual organ involved – their brain!

She Does It More Than Once

If a girl reaches orgasm through masturbation once, it’s likely that she’ll do it again a few times before she’s thoroughly finished. Many times, girls will experience their first round of multiple orgasms through masturbation, simply because they stop after the first orgasm but realize they don’t feel quite done yet. Unlike men, girls don’t go back down to an unaroused state after their first orgasm. Instead, they go back to the “plateau” phase – which comes after the foreplay phase but before the orgasmic phase. That makes it much easier for her to reach orgasm again after the first time!

3 Ways Pocket Vibrators Will Blow Your Mind!

Isabella Stone — Thu, 14 Jul 2011 23:00:59 +0000

Sex toys don’t have to be huge to get you off. Large sex toys often aren’t practical – they can be heavy and cumbersome to use, difficult to travel with and may use a lot of batteries or require plugging in to a wall outlet to operate. Often, better orgasms come in small packages! Here are three ways small vibrators will rock your world!

As a woman that likes to have things on demand (my favorite movies recorded, microwave meals in my fridge) I love to have a toy that is as instantly practical as it is tingly. Gyrating rabbits, and dildos that resemble the Incredible Hulk’s forearm, are all well and good for being stowed away at home; but are not the easiest of items to sneak away for a dirty weekend, or keep in your handbag.

Pocket-sized vibrators are the latest weapon in your arousal arsenal that will help you, and maybe a lucky male partner, enjoy naughty games on the go.

Hide It

As a ‘modern woman’ I reserve the right to masturbate at the office, the gym, or on my way to my boyfriend’s apartment; problem is all of those bright pink, spikey vibrators aren’t the easiest things to just ‘tuck away’ in the pocket of your handbag.

Pocket vibrators however, often come craftily disguised though as an unassuming article: there are the ‘butter fingers’ that look (ok, not that convincingly) like a candy bar; and then there are the ‘ lipstick vibe’s’. These small vibrators are sneakily shaped like a common place lipstick but conceal a naughty secret. Whether you’re more likely to have a candy bar or a lipstick in your handbag; there are pocket vibrators out there with enough stealth to make it through security at the airport; or your mother-in-law glaring into the contents of your carry on.

Play With It

Every girl should have a bullet!

These little devils are often only the size of the tip of your thumb but pack a punch. When inserted onto your clitoris they can vibrate so specifically that you’ll shudder more than with larger (and clumsier) vibrators.

Remote bullets are probably your best bet for fun and games with a deviant other half. Give your (lucky) boyfriend the remote control to adjust the speed and frequency of your vibrations; and then just pop the bullet into your panties. You can make this part of your normal foreplay routine; but I think it’s best to play some games instead.

If he wants to watch the football when you want some attention; get him to control your vibrations ‘remotely’ from the couch as you relax on your bed. Who knows he may even realize it would make great sense to join you during the commercial break!

In fact with a bullet you can forget ever having to have him cry ‘honey, dinner!!’ and get him to ‘buzz’ you instead.

Vary It

Bullets also come in a few other varieties. Some of them are not remotely controlled but instead there is a cable that connects the bullet to the remote; much like you might have seen with vibrating cock rings. Something about wires is distinctly ‘unsexy’. However, if you’re using a bullet during sex to stimulate your clitoris it does stop the two small parts becoming separated: let’s face it, it would be a tragedy that if in the heat of the moment you lost the remote to your favorite toy down the side of your bed!

Durex’s bullet variant is a slightly stranger design. The ‘play touch finger’ resembles those fake ‘witch fingers’ that you once cracked out as a kid over Halloween before you went trick or treating. Its design means that a soft rubber ‘finger’ slides over your own index finger, on the end of which is a bullet.

The bullets themselves are individually battery operated which means that they pack a punch. However, whatever genius worked out that Durex’s pocket vibrator design gave the most “Kapow” was severely let down by a designer who failed to realize that masturbating with a huge, synthetic finger puppet is just plain weird.

Boost It

The ‘play touch finger’ is also something I’d be too chronically embarrassed to pull out in front of a partner (though it feels so good I could probably overlook its ugliness when I’m alone… and blindfolded). So it misses out the best use of pocket vibrators; that they add spice to your sex life, without making your partner feel seconded to seven inches of silicone.

If you’re new into your relationship and don’t know how your other half feels about sex toys, these discreet little weapons will allow you to introduce some more buzz to the bedroom without referencing ‘Crocodile Dundee’, “You call that a vibrator? THIS is a vibrator!”

Pocket sized vibrators can be chucked casually into your over night bag and brought out at the crucial moment to ensure your orgasm. The clitoris is notoriously hard to stimulate during missionary (unless someone’s hand can be taken away from balance to be put down there). But the bullet is much smaller than your frenzied fingers and can slot comfortably between you and your partner as he penetrates you.

These ‘magic’ bullets are then well worth adding to, or beginning, your sex toy collection. In fact if you’re a woman who likes her orgasms clitoral, they’re invaluable.

And if you’re a forward thinking man who likes to please women, or want to know how to really tease a girl in a club, then they’re not only small enough to fit in a handbag: but can be slotted into a wallet too.

6 Ways To Make Male Masturbation Better Than Sex

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 12 Jul 2011 14:00:00 +0000

Male masturbation can be even better than sex if you do it right. Most guys just take a few minutes out of their day to polish one off, but if you embrace it and enjoy it rather than just try to get it over with, you can give yourself an orgasm that is out of this world. Here’s how to make male masturbation absolutely incredible!

Use Lube!

While male masturbation can be achieved without lube, it’s definitely not the best way to do it. Unfortunately, this is how most guys masturbate. Since they were young, they learned to do it quickly and without using any props that might possibly give them away or be difficult to hide if they got caught. It’s time to shed this learned behavior and start enjoying yourself!

Lube will intensify the sensations you experience during masturbation and make it feel more like sex. Without lube, there is a great deal more friction and the sensations aren’t as pleasurable. An uncircumcised male may notice this less than a circumcised male because they can glide their foreskin up and down the shaft of their penis. Some circumcised men do have enough skin left over after the surgery to do this to an extent, however, the skin is often stretched tight over a circumcised penis. A circumcised man will definitely want to use lube, since they can’t!

Try A Masturbation Sleeve

Male masturbation is easy with your hand, but it’s a lot better with a masturbation sleeve. A masturbation sleeve is a soft, jelly like sex toy that you slip over the penis and use as a “stroker.” They can be made out of a variety of materials, including silicone, Cyberskin and jelly materials, and many of them are textured to feel even better than a real vagina.

With a generous dollop of lube inside the sleeve, you can transform boring masturbation into something that feels totally different – and better – than anything you’ve ever felt before. Experiment with different types of masturbation sleeves to find the best fit for you.

Watch Porn – The Kind You REALLY Like

Almost all guys watch porn – that’s a given. However, there are many men who don’t watch the porn they really like. They may have a secret fetish that they’re embarrassed about, or they may get turned on by things that are considered shameful by many social circles. Therefore, these men don’t watch the porn that would really turn them on – instead, they watch something “conventional” that will get the job done, but nothing more.

If this is you, stop watching mediocre porn and find the stuff that really does it for you. Don’t be embarrassed to watch something that isn’t “traditional.” There are hundreds of different types of interests when it comes to the adult film industry, and you’re not alone. There are a lot of strange things out there, but if what gets you off doesn’t hurt anyone, there’s really nothing wrong with enjoying what you like. Since men are entirely visual creatures when it comes to sex, watching what really gets you hot has the power to increase your pleasure significantly.

Use A Warm Towel

Temperature has a lot to do with how good sex feels. For example, a real vagina is always warm and wet. So why not make male masturbation as warm and wet as you can? If you’ve got a bottle of lube handy, you’ve got the wet part covered. You can make it warm by throwing a damp towel in the microwave for a few seconds, but be careful not to get it too hot. It does, however, cool down quickly so it may take a few tries to get it just the right temperature.

Wrap the warm, damp towel around your penis (which, at this point, should have a lubed up masturbation sleeve on it) and then cover the damp towel with a dry one. You can also warm up the dry one in your clothes dryer if you like.

Go Slow And Take Your Time

For the same reason that men don’t often use lube during male masturbation, they also don’t take their time when they’re doing it. It’s just not how they learned to masturbate. They learned to do it quickly, before anyone could catch them. Make male masturbation feel more like real sex by planning to do it at a time when you are completely alone and you can lock your doors and turn off your phone.

Take your time to enjoy each phase of the process, from arousal to orgasm. Don’t rush through it – you’ll notice that the longer you spend pleasuring yourself, the better it will feel!

Let Your Orgasm Build

Don’t think that orgasm is where you need to be as soon as possible. When you’re having sex, you relish every feeling and sensation, making it last as long as you can. You also try your best to hold out on your own orgasm so your partner can have one or two of her own. Don’t think that this is something that you can only do during sex – you can also do it during male masturbation.

When you feel like you’re close to orgasm, back off a little. Stroke yourself in a different way or back off completely. Wait a few minutes before going back to it. This will not only train you to delay your orgasm so you can have more stamina during sex, it will also make masturbation absolutely explosive when you finally can’t hold out anymore!

Sex Toys: How To Keep Them Clean And Safe

Kaylen Jackson — Thu, 16 Jun 2011 14:00:28 +0000

Sex toys can get nasty if you don’t take care of them and keep them clean. Also, some sex toys contain harmful chemicals. Here’s how to keep your favorites like new – and safe for you!

What Are Phthalates?

You may have heard of phthalates – these are dangerous chemicals that can be found in some rubbers and plastics that have been shown to be carcinogenic (cancer causing). Some sex toys also have phthalates in them, namely products that are made of jelly rubber. If you’ve ever opened a brand new product and it smelled of chemicals or had a strong plastic smell, you were probably smelling the phthalates in the rubber.

Does My Sex Toy Have Phthalates?

Most hard plastic vibrators and the like do not contain phthalates, and some jelly feeling products are made from silicone, so the only way to know for sure is to read the packaging and manual that came with your product and find out what it is made of. Some sex toys that do have phthalates aren’t going to necessarily advertise that they do, so if you suspect that your product does contain these chemicals and there’s no information in the packaging to suggest otherwise, you’ll want to assume that it does and take measures to stay safe.

If you’re purchasing a new sex toy or selecting your first one, finding one that is made without phthalates is actually very easy. Glass sex toys, hard plastic vibrators, wood, ceramic, metal and silicone sex toys are all phthalate free. A simple Internet search will reveal tons of phthalate free products for you to choose from.

Using A Condom With Your Vibrator

It’s a huge bummer to find out that your favorite sex toy is made with phthalates. It’s given you orgasm after orgasm and it works like a charm – but should you throw it out? Perhaps, but you don’t necessarily have to. Most people don’t think to use condoms during masturbation – since you’re not really risking getting pregnant or contracting STD’s – but condoms can actually help protect you from dangerous chemicals found in some sex toys.

The next time you’re getting ready to use your vibrator or dildo, slip a condom over it before inserting it into your vagina. This will help protect the delicate tissues inside the vagina from the chemicals. However, using a condom won’t protect you from any phthalates that are on the outside of the toy. For example, if you own a rabbit style vibrator, you can slip a condom over the dildo part of the toy, but you will still remain unprotected from the jelly covering on the vibrating clitoris attachment. All in all though, using a condom with sex toys that you suspect may contain dangerous phthalates significantly reduces your risk.

Using The Right Kind Of Lube

Not all lubricants are compatible with all sex toys. If you’re using the wrong lubricant with your products, you’re going to find that they degrade faster or become sticky, tacky or unusable in just a short amount of time. Finding the right lube to use with your product is essential if you want it to last longer.

Silicone: Silicone sex toys cannot be used with silicone lube. This will cause the material to degrade.

Hard Plastic: Can be used with any type of lube.

Wood: Can be used with any type of lube.

Latex: Cannot be used with oil based lube. Similarly, condoms cannot be used with oil based lube either.

Ceramic & Glass: Can be used with any type of lube.

Jelly Rubber: Best with water based lube, since jelly rubber can contain elements of latex and silicone.

In truth, water based lubricant is probably your best bet for any kind of sex toys. You don’t have to worry about buying different types of lube that are compatible with all your different kinds of products if you’re using a good water based lube. Water based lube is also a breeze to rinse off, unlike silicone or oil based lubricants.

Cleanup & Storage

When you’re using a condom with your sex toys, you can pretty much slip the condom off and store it right then and there. You might have to wipe it down some if things got really wild, but using a condom during masturbation actually helps make clean up faster.

If you’re not using a condom with your product, read the instructions to find out the manufacturer’s suggested cleaning methods. Most hard plastic toys can be wiped down with a damp cloth, while jelly rubber or latex products probably need a good soap and water bath to feel really clean.

You’ll always want to clean your products immediately after use. Sure, you may be spent after an incredible orgasm, however, you definitely don’t want to leave your toy sitting there for any length of time. This will cause it to grow bacteria and many sex toys are porous – meaning that the bacteria will actually absorb into the material of the product. This means your toys will retain odor and may never feel really “clean” again. Be safe and clean your products as soon as you’re done.

How To Become A Sex Superstar

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 14 Jun 2011 14:00:20 +0000

Sex can be many things – it can be incredible, but it can also be mediocre. Don’t settle for less than the best – here’s how to turn yourself into a sex bomb!

Build Your Confidence

Confidence is the number one thing you need to have in your arsenal. Nothing else is as effective at feeling good about yourself and seducing others as confidence is. Instead of standing in front of a mirror picking out your flaws, check yourself out.

Point out things that you love about yourself, whether it’s something about the way you look or something about who you are. Learn to love yourself and be confident in the real you, and show the real you to other people. You’ll be surprised at what a difference it really makes.

Dress To Kill

Clothes and appearances are overrated, right? Sometimes. However, looking your best will naturally boost your confidence and will also make you more attractive and noticeable to others. So splurge on that dress you were eyeing the other day, or spend ten extra minutes curling your hair. Put a little more effort into the way you look and make sure you’re looking – and feeling – fabulous every time you walk out the door. If you know you look amazing, you’re going to exude confidence and sex to everyone around you and you’ll literally be a walking bombshell!

Explore Your Own Sexuality

Being a bombshell when it comes to sex isn’t about waiting for your partner to figure out the right “buttons” to push to give you pleasure. It’s about taking control of your own pleasure and learning what you like and what you don’t like on your own. Don’t expect a guy to find your g-spot, your clitoris or any other hot spot of yours if you haven’t bothered to find it first.

Masturbation is the best way for women to discover how they like to be touched and what works best to bring them to orgasm during nookie. If you don’t have a sex toy, now is the time to get one. Splurge on a high quality vibrator or other sex toy and lock the doors and dim the lights. Take charge of your own pleasure and explore your sexuality. Learn what you like and what you don’t like, so you can confidently communicate to any partner what you want while doing the dirty.

Learn To Please Your Partner

A sex vixen not only knows what she wants during sex, she also knows how to please her partner. You may think you know all there is to know about getting it on and how to give a guy an orgasm, but chances are, you’re not as well informed as you think. While a guy is pretty much guaranteed a climax if he’s doing it with a woman – heck, all it takes is a little lotion and his hand anyways – but there are ways to make your partner literally explode with pleasure if you take the time to learn the sex techniques that will blow him out of the water.

Take some time to check out a few tips and techniques to give your man an earth shattering blowjob or even how to use prostate massage to intensify his climax. Learn to do things that no other girl has ever done before, and practice them until you get really good. Your guy will love that you’re interested in doing new things, but he’ll also love the learning process! Make sure you have a few tricks up your sleeve for the next time you get it on.

Don’t Be Afraid To Try New Things

A sex vixen isn’t afraid to try new things in – or out – of the bedroom. This, in part, is due to having confidence. A woman who has confidence in herself, the way she looks and the ability to please herself and her partner isn’t going to be scared to bring out some new sex toys or to try new sex positions in the bedroom.

Constantly think about new things you can try with your partner, even if it’s only a little different from things that you’ve done before. It doesn’t matter what you do – it could be as simple as tugging his scrotum lightly during a blowjob if you’ve never done it before. As long as you’re constantly looking for new ways to please your partner and yourself, you’re going to evolve into a sex vixen in no time.

5 Tips To Make A Handjob More Exciting

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 11 Jun 2011 14:00:22 +0000

A handjob isn’t something a woman often gives her guy because he can do it himself, right? Why would he want to feel her hand on his penis when he can just as easily use his own – besides, he knows what he likes. However, a handjob given by a girl isn’t quite the same as masturbation – it can be even better. Surprise him with an incredible handjob TONIGHT with these hot tips.

Hey Dan and Jenn. I wondered if you had any advice on giving my boyfriend a handjob. Every time I do it, it’s just seems so boring for the both of us. It takes ages for him to climax and he says he likes it, but it doesn’t seem that way. It would be nice to get some advice since I don’t always feel like having sex, and I don’t feel like giving him a blowjob every time I dont feel like having sex. Thank you.

–YouTube Viewer

Attitude Is Key

There’s a reason that what women do in porn flicks is so popular – because no matter what they’re doing, they act like they’re completely enthusiastic about doing it. If you’re giving your man a handjob and you’re acting like you’ve got better things to do (even if you really do), he’s not going to be as into it either. On the other side of the coin, if your attitude says that there’s nothing that you’d rather be doing besides giving your guy manual pleasure (even if there is), he’s going to get more and more into it.

Make Sure You’re Using A Good Lubricant

A handjob without lube isn’t going to feel very good at all. Make sure that when you’re giving your partner manual stimulation, that you have a generous amount of either water or silicone based lube on hand. Contrary to popular belief, saliva isn’t a lubricant.

Even if you produce enough saliva to completely coat his penis, it will dry out quickly and it really doesn’t feel that good. If you’re using a good lubricant during a handjob, it’s going to feel better for him (a lot better!) and it’s going to be much easier for you. You won’t have to work as hard to stroke his shaft up and down because the lube will make things smooth and slippery.

Use A Vibrating Bullet

Some guys don’t respond to vibrations on their penis, but some really do! Take a bullet vibrator and hold it in your hands while you give your man a handjob. It’s definitely a little different sensation, but if he likes vibrations, then he will REALLY like this! Another thing you can do with a vibrating bullet or egg is to place it firmly underneath his scrotum, right on the perineum. This will stimulate his prostate gland from the outside, which is a great option for men who are squeamish about anal sex or anal stimulation of any kind.

Remember that it’s okay to use props during a handjob – just because it’s a “handjob” doesn’t mean that you can’t use sex toys too – such as vibrators, anal stimulators, prostate massagers or even masturbation sleeves. In fact, a masturbation sleeve can feel divine for a guy getting a handjob – because so many of them feel close to the way a mouth or vagina feels – and it makes giving him pleasure completely easy and stress free.

Handjob Techniques

With the right attitude, some lube and maybe some props, giving a handjob doesn’t have to be about technique at all. However, for those women who really want a great technique to use to give their man an orgasm manually, these techniques are tried and true:

Twist And Shout

Grab the base of his penis and pull the skin tightly towards his groin. Use your other hand to stroke his shaft up and down (with lube), while rotating your wrist in a “twisting” motion. The idea behind this technique is that you’re tightening the skin and twisting – so it feels completely different than the way he masturbates himself.

Bookends

Place your palms together as though you were praying, and then slip your man’s penis in between your hands. Your hands should look like a pair of bookends on either side of his penis. Lightly put pressure on his penis as though you were pushing your hands together, and then move your hands up and down to stroke his shaft.

Add Some Great Products To The Mix

You can make a handjob even better for your man by adding some great products to the mix. For example:

Use a sensitizing lube to make his penis more sensitive and responsive to your touch
Use a male masturbator, such as the Super Head Honcho Masturbator by Adam & Eve
Use warming or cooling lubes to give him different sensations
If he really likes cool sensations, tease him with an ice cube

Remember that giving a handjob is all about having fun and giving your partner great pleasure. It doesn’t have to be perfect and it doesn’t even have to end in a climax – although, that is definitely a much anticipated bonus! Relax and have fun, and don’t worry about “doing it wrong” or things getting “boring.” Experiment with different techniques, lubes and props and a handjob will never be the same again – for you or your partner!

10 Beginner’s Sex Toys You’ve GOT To Have (If You’re A Novice)

Kaylen Jackson — Thu, 02 Jun 2011 14:00:50 +0000

Sex toys can be intimidating if you’ve never used them before. This is especially true for virgin girls who wish to masturbate but aren’t sure what kind of product to get, or for men who have never used masturbating sleeves or other “toys for boys” before and aren’t sure where to begin. If you’re just starting to use sex toys, here are the ones you definitely want to try!

Lots Of Lube

Lube is extremely important to use when playing with sex toys. In fact, it’s also great to use during sex but many people that haven’t made the foray into sex toys have never tried using lube before either! Whether you’re having sex with a partner or masturbating with a vibrator, even just a dab of lube will make things slip and slide much better. Of course, the wetter the better so lots of lube is preferred, especially with anal sex!

Recommendation: Astroglide! It’s basic, easy to use and has been used for years. It’s an all around great lube to use that is safe for both sex toys and use with condoms.

A Masturbation Sleeve

Every guy starts out masturbating with their own hand, and many guys still do. If you haven’t discovered how really great masturbating with a sex toy is, you’re in for a real treat. Try slipping your penis into a lubed up masturbation sleeve before your self-love session and see what a difference it makes! You can get all kinds of sleeves to satisfy whatever desires you have, whether you’re into lots of texture or something really nice and tight. Masturbation will never be the same again!

Recommendation: Climax Gems Crystal Hand Job Stroker. It’s a great way to start using a masturbation sleeve if you’ve never used one before, especially since some of the more “anatomically correct” strokers can seem a little intimidating at first. This one is extra ribbed for pleasure too!

A Slender Vibrator

Women that have never used a vibrator inside before will definitely want to try something small and slender at first. A slender vibrator doesn’t hurt going in when used with lube – even for many virgins – and the torpedo design will reach the g-spot in no time. This is a great product to start out with when you’re just beginning to use sex toys during penetration.

Recommendation: 5″ Grrl Toyz Waterproof Slimstick. This is a great vibrator for women who are interested in trying insertion during masturbation or couples play but don’t want to start with a giant dildo. It’s slim design is great for even very small women or virgins.

A Clitoris Vibrator

Most girls start out rubbing their clitoris with their fingers or palms when they first start to masturbate. This is because the clitoris is packed with over 8,000 sensitive nerve endings and is responsible for most women’s orgasms. Many women prefer to masturbate with a clitoris vibrator, even if they’ve had sex before or masturbated with a vibrator or dildo designed for insertion. Using a vibrator on the clitoris can induce very intense, very powerful orgasms!

Recommendation: Ophoria Finger Vibe – 3″. Every girl needs to start out with a clitoris vibrator, especially if she’s a virgin. Women can reach orgasm most often through clitoral stimulation, so this can even be a great toy to use with a partner as well. It fits easily on the finger and also comes in a variety of fun, bright colors.

A Traveling Vibrator

Once you get into using sex toys, you’re going to want to take them wherever you go. Especially for those long business trips away from your partner where you know you’ll be “flying solo” so to speak! But if you’re flying, or even driving for that matter, you don’t necessarily want to take your most conspicuous vibrator in case your luggage gets checked. A travel safe vibrator is a must have for women on the go.

Recommendation: Grrl Toyz Lipstick Vibe. It looks exactly like lipstick. Enough said.

Toy Cleaner

Even if you’ve never used sex toys before, it’s not difficult to guess that they can get pretty nasty if you don’t clean them thoroughly before and after each use. While you can use soap and water to clean most sex toys, getting a good anti-bacterial toy cleaner is a must to keep your sex toys looking and feeling like new each time you use them. Often, it’s a lot easier to use a special toy cleaner than it is to bust out the soap and hot water.

Recommendation: System Jo Toy Cleaner. Priced right, all you have to do with this easy to use toy cleaner is spray it on and wipe it off. It’s a quick way to keep your sex toys lasting longer.

A Cock Ring

Just like with masturbation sleeves, most guys don’t think about using cock rings – or any sex toys, really – during masturbation. Since they can simply use their hands (and there’s rarely any evidence laying around if all you’re using is a hand), most guys don’t think about how much better a masturbation session can be by using and experimenting with different products designed for sexual enhancement. Next time you masturbate, try slipping on a cock ring to keep your erection rock hard and lasting long. You’ll be surprised at how good everything feels with a cock ring on!

Recommendation: M2M Nitrile 1.75″ Cock Rings (Pack Of 5). You definitely don’t want to use a metal cock ring, and these soft rings are made from nitrile, which is compatible with all kinds of lube, including silicone and oil based!

A Butt Plug

If you’re starting to get into anal sex or even just a little anal play, a beginner’s butt plug is a must have. Whether you’re enjoying anal stimulation during sex or during masturbation, a small butt plug can give you just enough stimulation without being painful to make your sexual escapades feel radically different – and amazing! Make sure you use any anal toy with lube and never insert anything into your anus that isn’t designed to go there, because it could get lost!

Recommendation: Basix Rubber Works Mini Butt Plug. Comes in four colors and is super small for beginner’s use. You definitely want to use water based lube with this one though.

A Bullet Massager

Often, a bullet massager is a woman’s first vibrating sex toy. Even if it’s not, a bullet vibrator is something you definitely want to have on hand. It too is a great vibrator to take with you on trips! A bullet vibrator is also the kind you want to use with a lot of couples’ sex toys, such as cock rings with a place for a bullet vibe to go on top. Sometimes, a simple bullet vibrator is all you need to get and stay satisfied.

Recommendation: Power Bullet Vibrating Massager – 3 Speeds. Small, discreet and easy to use. Tiny enough to take with you anywhere but it’s vibrations are powerful for how small this toy really is!

A Blindfold

A blindfold is a great way to get your feet wet with BDSM if you’re just starting to get interested in it but don’t want to go too far with the whips and chains at first. A blindfold adds such an incredible element of mystery and most of them are incredibly inexpensive. You can use a silk tie or other things from around the house to create a blindfold, but buying one isn’t very expensive and are much more comfortable to wear – especially for longer periods of time.

Recommendation: Fetish Fantasy Series Satin Love Mask. It’s just your basic love mask, but if you’ve never tried BDSM before, a blindfold is where you want to start. You can’t imagine how sexy things can get once you take away the sense of sight!

How To Use A Masturbation Sleeve On Him

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 15 May 2011 14:00:20 +0000

Sex toys can spice up your sex life, but most of the time, people assume you’re referring to vibrators for women. In fact, the far majority of people believe that sex toys are just for women! The reality is that there are a lot of sex toys out there for guys, from cock rings to anal toys to masturbation sleeves. And not all of this is just for solo play – here’s how to use a masturbator on HIM!

Masturbation Sleeves Aren’t Just For Him

While the name “masturbation sleeve” gives people the idea that the product can only be used during masturbation, the truth is that a masturbation sleeve can actually be used during a handjob as well! If your partner has been apprehensive to the idea of bringing in a sleeve, trying it on him first during a handjob can warm him up to the idea. He may very well be surprised at just how good it feels! Instead of lubing up your hands next time for a handjob, slip on a masturbation sleeve instead and let the fun begin!

How It’s Better For You

Let’s face it – giving a handjob can be tiring. Especially if your man isn’t super sensitive. If you’re really trying to bring him to orgasm through a handjob, you could be there for thirty minutes or more pumping away. Plus, there are lots of different handjob techniques you need to learn if you really want to get good at it. Or, you can just bring in a masturbation sleeve!

Using sex toys on him during a handjob makes it much, much easier for you. You’ll notice that you don’t get tired as easily or that your hands and arms don’t cramp up as quickly.
No technique is really required when giving a handjob with a masturbation sleeve. The texture of the sleeve does it all for you.
Since the sensations are much, much more powerful, your man will reach orgasm much faster than if you were just using your hands.
It’s a great alternative to having sex if you really just don’t feel like putting out!

How It’s Better For Him

Using a masturbation sleeve on him during a handjob isn’t just easier for you, it feels better for him too! There are many benefits for him when using sex toys during a handjob instead of just your hands.

The soft material feels way better than your hands, especially when used with enough lube.
Many sleeves are textured inside to provide different sensations during use.
This is a good toy to use if you’re a novice, or haven’t had that much practice giving a handjob. A handjob can take forever if you’re not skilled at it, so save yourself the trouble (and make it feel better for him) by using a sleeve.
It’s great for him because using sex toys during a handjob will make it so much easier for you, you’re going to be willing to give him handjobs more often!

Advanced Techniques

There is so much fun to be had for both partners when using sex toys with each other. Even if it’s not a couples sex toy, such as in the case of the masturbation sleeve, you can still have a lot of fun using it on your partner and watching wave after wave of pleasure wash over them.

Try using it in the shower with a really thick, silicone based lube. Just make sure your toy isn’t silicone!
Try mutual masturbation on each other. Use the masturbation sleeve on him and let him use other sex toys, such as vibrators, on you!
You can also masturbate yourselves with these sex toys while watching each other. This is a great way to learn how your partner likes to be touched!

Recommendations

There are lots of different male masturbators out there on the market, and it can be confusing to find the right one. Pretty much, any masturbation sleeve is going to feel great for him, but there are some products out there that are going to give you better results.

Super Head Honcho Masturbator

Adam & Eve’s top selling masturbator. Has a wide mouth for insertion and lots of little nubs on the inside for extra pleasure. What makes this sleeve so great is that it’s super easy to clean – just flip it inside out and wash with warm soapy water or toy cleaner.

Climax Gems Crystal Handjob Stroker

Made from crystal clear Cyberskin, this masturbation sleeve will feel fantastic for him. One side is ribbed, while the other is studded, so you can flip it around for tons of different sensations. This one is also super easy to clean – which frankly, is a must for male masturbators!

Adam And Eve Pleasure Pearl Masturbator

This one has pleasure pearls deep inside that move around as you stroke this up and down the penis towards orgasm, but that’s not what makes this sex toy so unique. It is one of the only masturbation sleeves that include loops on the outside, which are slipped over the fingers and used as a handle! Guys who use masturbation sleeves know that things can get slippery sometimes!

Things To Keep In Mind

Keep in mind to use lots of good lube when using a masturbation sleeve on your partner. Check out what your sex toy is made from – silicone toys cannot be used with silicone lube. Water based lube is pretty much a safe bet for anything, so make sure to stock up before you get started. Male masturbators really can’t be used without lube!

Also, keep in mind that you will need to clean the sleeve properly after each and every use. Think about it – those things can get pretty nasty if you use them more than once without cleaning them in between uses! Most sleeves are easy to clean because you can flip them inside out, but if you choose other products such as a Fleshlight, you’re in for a little more cleanup. No matter which sex toys you choose though, the cleanup is well worth it!

Can Masturbation Cause A Penis To Break?

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 06 May 2011 14:00:48 +0000

Masturbation is usually harmless and is even healthy for a man’s body and his sex life. But the penis is more delicate than you think – can a penis actually break during masturbation or even during rough sex? Believe it or not – yes! While it’s not exactly like having a broken bone, having a broken penis is a serious and painful condition. Here’s what you need to know and how you can avoid it!

What Is A Penile Fracture?

A man’s member doesn’t break in the same sense that a bone would break, because there aren’t any bones in the penis. However, it can fracture and here’s what the Mayo Clinic has to say about it:

During an erection, the penis is engorged with blood. If the penis is bent suddenly or forcefully while it’s engorged, the trauma may rupture the lining of one of the two muscular cylinders in the penis responsible for erections — resulting in a penis fracture.

When The Penis Can Break

The penis can fracture during especially vigorous masturbation, but it can also happen during rough sex or when engaging in awkward sex positions. A man is generally careful with his package, especially since the scrotum and testicles are so sensitive, but it is especially important to be careful with the penis as well.

What Indicates A Fracture?

A fracture isn’t something you’re going to miss or think you “might” have. This is something you (and your partner if you’re having sex) are going to be aware of immediately. A fracture is characterized by a loud “cracking” sound, followed by extreme pain and the immediate loss of erection, as well as a deep, dark bruise that spreads over the area very quickly.

What To Do In The Event Of A Fracture

If you’ve experienced a fracture of the penis during masturbation or during sex, it’s important to seek medical attention immediately. Don’t bother driving yourself to the hospital or even having your partner drive you to the emergency room. In a case like this, you will probably want to dial 911.

A doctor will give you pain medicine right away and will most likely recommend some type of surgery to correct the problem. If you leave a penile fracture alone (but chances are, you’re not going to want to see if it “goes away on it’s own”), it can create more serious problems such as having a malformed penis or experiencing erectile dysfunction – being unable to get or maintain an erection at all.

Don’t be embarassed about going to the doctor or seeking medical attention for a problem like this – your doctor has seen it all before and you’ll be very sorry if you didn’t go get treated just because you were embarrassed.

How To Prevent A Fracture

While some people like rough sex and enjoy the feeling of pain mixed with pleasure, you need to be especially aware of pain during sex. If something hurts, don’t do it! Communicate with your partner and let them know what you like and don’t like – and what feels painful to you. If something starts to hurt, stop immediately and find something else that is fun and pleasurable! Sex toys such as a masturbation sleeve – which is soft and usually made of jelly-like silicone – can feel fantastic and it’s very unlikely that you will get a fracture if you pleasure yourself this way.

More Common Injuries During Masturbation

While penis fractures are actually quite rare, there are more common injuries that can happen during masturbation:

Chafing from not using lube. Lube is inexpensive and available almost everywhere. Not only will a good water or silicone based lube help it feel better and give you better orgasms, it will also help keep you from chafing!
Skin reactions from using lotions, shampoos and other products not designed for use on the genitals. While it may seem like a good idea to just use the shampoo or soap in the shower when you want to do your business, the fragrances and additives in these products can easily irritate the sensitive skin of the penis. Play it safe and use lube!
Bruising or soreness if masturbating very hard. Again, if it hurts, stop! You don’t have to masturbate hard or fast to have a great experience. Go easy on yourself so you don’t hurt anything.
Urinary tract infections, especially when using products like lotions or soaps not designed to be using while masturbating. The products can easily get into the urethra through the opening in the head of the penis and can not only burn or irritate the penis, they can also cause nasty infections that require a doctor’s care and a prescription for antibiotics to get rid of. Again, proper lubrication really makes a difference when masturbating.

How To Enhance Your Orgasm – For Men

Kaylen Jackson — Thu, 05 May 2011 14:00:28 +0000

An orgasm for men – when they’re by themselves – is often just a “get it done” kind of thing. Guys are used to masturbating quickly, usually because they either grew up afraid to get caught or are still afraid to get caught – and for many guys, it’s a combination of both. Masturbation is a healthy part of any man’s sex life, so here’s how you can make your masturbation sessions so much more satisfying.

Use Lube During Masturbation

As much as this sounds like common sense, there are actually a lot of guys who just don’t use lube during masturbation. They often use nothing, or they’ll use some kind of lotion or petroleum jelly. These just aren’t suitable for masturbation. They dry out too quickly and can cause allergic reactions and rashes on the sensitive skin of the penis. Lube is specifically developed to be used during sex (and this includes when you go solo) so it feels better and will help give you an incredible orgasm.

Water based lube is always a good choice, but silicone based lube is also effective for masturbation because it’s thicker and it lasts longer. Lube is cheap and is available almost anywhere, including your local supermarket or drugstore. Many lubes are now created with special ingredients to either warm the penis or prolong an erection. Experiment with different lubes until you find the one that is best for you!

Consider Using Male Sex Toys

A lot of guys assume that sex toys are just for women to use – but there are actually a lot of fun toys for guys to use too! Masturbation sleeves can make a huge difference in how great your orgasm is. When used with lube, the simple silicone sleeve can make masturbation (and even a handjob from your lady) feel absolutely divine. Many masturbation sleeves come with ribbed or studded interiors, making the experience that much more pleasurable!

There are other male sex toys, including cock rings (which trap the blood inside the penis after an erection and make it last longer and stay harder) as well as butt plugs and prostate massagers. Next time you make a trip to the adult toy store – or if you’re browsing online – take a look and see what they have to offer for you – not just your woman!

Don’t Rush It

Since most guys grew up with the fear of getting caught spanking the monkey, they view masturbation as a “get it done quick” ritual. In fact, most men only need minutes to achieve orgasm when they’re stroking themselves. While an orgasm during a quickie masturbation session is certainly satisfactory, it definitely isn’t what you would consider “amazing” or even “okay.” It simply does the job.

If you want to make your orgasm better, take your time. Plan to masturbate during a time where you are home alone for significant period of time. Lock the doors, close the curtains and take a few deep breaths. Look at some erotica to start getting yourself aroused and then take your time with it. Don’t rush it – if you get close to orgasm, stop stimulating yourself. Pick it back up again after you’ve backed away from the brink of climax a little bit. Once you do this several times, you finally won’t be able to help going over the edge – but by this time, your pleasure will be so built up that the final release is nothing short of incredible.

Watch Porn – Good Porn

Porn is something almost every guy watches, and if he says he doesn’t, there’s an excellent chance that he’s lying. There’s nothing wrong with watching porn – men are visual creatures and have a difficult time becoming aroused and reaching orgasm if there isn’t any visual stimulation. So it makes sense that men watch adult movies when getting off, but surprisingly, a lot of men aren’t watching what really turns them on. Why?

Price could be a factor. DVD’s and subscriptions to adult websites can be expensive. Also, a guy may have a secret fetish that he’s just not willing to admit he has (even to himself) so he just makes do with whatever free porn he can find on the Internet. If you’re not watching the porn you really want to be watching, just get what you want and get on with it. Even if it means shelling out a few extra bucks. The increase in the pleasure of your orgasm will be well worth it.

Try Prostate Massage

If you’re really freaked out by the idea of anal play (on yourself), then skip this part entirely. But if the idea intrigues you and you just haven’t had the balls to do it yet, read on. The prostate is often considered the male “g-spot” and can provide a man with intense pleasure when it is simulated, especially in conjunction with sexual activity. Some men have experienced prostate massage with their partners, but have never tried it on themselves during masturbation.

If you’re open to the idea, purchase a small butt plug to start. You can also use a finger on the hand that you’re not using to stroke your penis. Make sure you have lots of good lube on hand, because anal play can really hurt without proper lubrication. To find your prostate on yourself, you will need to use the “come hither” motion (if you’re using your fingers) and move toward your stomach. This usually involves reaching down in between your legs rather than trying to reach around from behind. Go slow and work your way up in size if you’re using sex toys. Remember that if it ever hurts, stop! However, with practice, prostate massage can give you the kind of orgasms you never dreamed you’d have.

How To Have Great Sex Without Penetration

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 03 Apr 2011 15:14:08 +0000

Sex isn’t all about penetration. It’s a common misconception that you have to actually have intercourse to have awesome sex, but the truth is, you can actually have wonderful physical intimacy with your partner while not bumping uglies at all! There is so much more to doing it than just “penis-in-the-vagina” – in fact, there are so many more enjoyable ways to experience your partner sexually while avoiding intercourse! Here’s how.

Why Couples Would Want To Skip Traditional Intercourse

You might be wondering why anyone in their right mind would want to skip out on the sex part of sex. There are, however, lots of couples who either can’t or don’t want to have traditional intercourse with each other for various reasons. Some couples may want to avoid unwanted pregnancy by not engaging in penetration (if they’re not using condoms or birth control) and other couples may be avoiding penetration for religious, spiritual or moral reasons.

After childbirth, women are often cautioned not to have sex for six weeks afterwards, leaving them at a loss on how to please their partners when sex is not an option. Other couples may not be a great fit physically down there and will get more enjoyment out of foreplay than actual intercourse.

Oral Sex

Oral sex is a great way to give your partner an amazing orgasm with no intercourse. Most people feel like oral sex is for foreplay only, but why not make it the main event? It is that great, after all! Take turns pleasuring your lover with your tongue and letting them do the same for you, or try the sixty-nine position and give each other simultaneous oral sex. You may not think it’s possible to feel completely satisfied after having only oral sex with your partner and forgoing intercourse, but the truth is, you might even have a better and more satisfying orgasm this way than through intercourse alone. Your partner will too!

Masturbation

If oral sex isn’t your thing or you’re just not ready to go there with your partner yet, think about masturbation. Not the flying solo kind, but the masturbating your partner with your hands kind. This is better known as fingering (if they’re a girl) and giving a handjob (if they’re a guy). Lots of people avoid this type of stimulation when they’re getting it on with their lovers because they feel like that manual stimulation is actually boring – especially since this is the kind of stimulation you get all the time when you masturbate alone.

However, you can give your partner amazing orgasms through manual stimulation! All it takes is time, a little hard work and lots and lots of great lube. Most people who don’t enjoy getting a handjob from their partner have forgotten that crucial component – lots of lube!

Sex Toys

If you’re not going to have intercourse with your partner, why not bring in some fun sex toys to play with instead? If she can handle penetration but just not with a penis (for example, if she’s trying not to get pregnant), try using a dildo or a vibrator. If penetration of any kind is out of the question, a clitoris vibrator can definitely come into play. This is a great way to give a woman an orgasm when avoiding intercourse, especially if oral sex or fingering isn’t your thing. Instead of letting her take care of herself with the vibrator (which a lot of guys do when they can’t do it with their ladies), take care of it for her and get off on her pleasure.

For the men, sex toys can also be beneficial when you can’t or don’t want to do it the traditional way. Male masturbators (also known as masturbation sleeves) can make giving him a handjob a lot easier, especially when you use plenty of lube. In fact, it will probably feel better for him too!

Kissing

If you’re avoiding sexual activity all together for whatever reason, don’t forget that you can stay physically intimate and close to your partner through kissing. Don’t just assume that the quick kiss you gave your lover before work will suffice – if you’re not having sex, take some time to have a really great and satisfying make out session with your partner.

Kiss your lover deeply and slowly, with no regard to how much time you have or what is going to come next. Simply enjoy the kissing experience for what it is and encourage your partner to do the same. When done right, kissing can be an extremely satisfying way to stay physically connected to your lover when you can’t get it on!

Is It Unhealthy To Masturbate Daily?

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 11 Mar 2011 14:00:19 +0000

Masturbation is a healthy and normal part of growing up for both men and women, but how can you tell when it becomes too much? Is it possible to have an addiction to it and if so, can you do serious harm to yourself by masturbating too much? Here’s what you want to know about masturbating and when and where to draw the line.

Question: I am 16 year old man and I masturbate once a day. I began masturbating when I was 12 – is that unhealthy or I will have problems in future? Thanks for your help!

–YouTube Viewer

Masturbation Is Perfectly Healthy And Natural

Masturbation is a perfectly healthy and natural part of everyone’s sex life. Both men and women masturbate, although male masturbation is quite a bit more common than the female counterpart. However, learning how to pleasure yourself is an important part of going through puberty and can help you translate your sexual desires and preferences to your partners as you become sexually active. There are lots of benefits to self-love, including:

It helps relieve sexual frustration and pent up sexual feelings
It helps reduce unwanted erections
When done properly, it can help reduce or prevent premature ejaculation
Even daily masturbation can be helpful if you’re not addicted to it

How To Tell If You’re Addicted To Masturbation

There are many ways to tell if you’re addicted to masturbating, and they’re similar to the signs people exhibit when they’re addicted to anything, including sex, drugs, food and alcohol. If you think you might be addicted to pleasuring yourself, ask yourself these questions:

Do you think about it often? Is it the primary thing you’re thinking about throughout the day?
Do you find it difficult to focus on other things because you’re looking forward to it?
Do you plan your activities around the times you know you’re going to masturbate?
Are you masturbating so much that you’re causing your penis to become raw or painful?
Would you rather masturbate than have sex with your partner?

Even if you self pleasure often, that doesn’t automatically mean that you are addicted to it and need to stop. If you start noticing that all you really want to do is get it on with yourself, you’ve probably crossed the line. Masturbation should not rule your life!

What To Do If You’re Addicted To Masturbating

If you answered “yes” to any of the above questions and you think you may be addicted to it, it’s okay to seek help. Addiction comes in many forms (it’s not just drugs and alcohol) and can seriously wreak havoc on your life if you don’t check out some resources that can help you tone down your addiction to masturbating.

If you’re not sure where to go to get help for a masturbation addiction, start by talking to your doctor. Don’t be embarrassed – your doctor has heard it all before and then some. Your doctor can do a thorough examination to determine whether you’re really doing harm to yourself by masturbating too much.

This will most likely only include a series of questions similar to those above rather than a physical examination unless you’ve got something going on down there (such as raw sores or bumps on the penis) that might be caused by excessive masturbation. Your doctor can refer you to someone that can help you talk through whatever issues you have that may be causing you to want to masturbate so often. Just remember that there is nothing wrong with seeking help for a problem and working towards bettering yourself!

Tips For Healthy Masturbation

If you’re masturbating once a day (or less, or more) and you’re not addicted to it, just enjoy it and enjoy the benefits that masturbating has to offer. If you’re leading an otherwise healthy and active life outside of your masturbatory activities, try not to worry too much about it. It’s a perfectly normal and healthy part of life for both men and women. There are, however, a few ways you can make it even better:

Use lube!
Oil, lotion, saliva or water are not good for pleasuring yourself. Lube is inexpensive, it’s readily available at just about any drug store or supermarket and it will make it feel so much better!
To use masturbation to prevent unwanted erections, stroke yourself until you’re at the brink of orgasm, then take a break. This technique will help you learn how to last longer and control your climax.
Try mutual masturbation with your partner so you can both get an idea of how best to pleasure the other.

Why Women Do (Or Don’t) Watch Porn

Kaylen Jackson — Tue, 08 Mar 2011 14:00:13 +0000

Porn isn’t just for guys – ladies enjoy it too! A lot of girls really enjoy watching porn, either with their partners as a form of foreplay or without their partners to arouse them before and during masturbation. However, there are many ladies that just can’t stand the idea of adult movies. Here’s the downlow on why girls do (or don’t) like naughty flicks.

Why Women Want To Watch Porn

There are many reasons a woman might want to enjoy porn, although it’s not exactly the majority of a woman’s preferred way to get turned on or masturbate. However, if a girl is eyeballing a dirty flick, she might be doing it to:

Masturbate

Believe it or not, guys aren’t the only ones who want to check out a skin flick before or during masturbation. While many girls prefer reading erotic novels, some of them do, in fact, enjoy visual stimulation before “clicking their own mouse.”

Get Turned On Before Sex

Some girls have a difficult time becoming really aroused before having sex with their lovers. A woman may look at porn either with or without her partner before sex to give herself time to get warmed up before getting busy. If watched with your partner before getting it on, porn can become an integral part of foreplay.

Get Sex Advice

While porn probably isn’t the best place to get sex advice and “how to” tips from, many ladies look at it for that very reason nonetheless. You can learn many things from an adult movie, from how to give a blowjob (porn style, of course) and different sex positions that you and your lover might be interested in trying. If you’re watching porn to understand sex better, however, remember that it is a movie and it is acting. You’d be better off snagging a video that is specifically made to teach sex techniques.

Just See What It’s All About

A lot of girls are curious just to see what the big fuss is all about. Pretty much every guy watches porn (and they even make a big deal out of having it and hiding it), so a girl may check out a naughty flick just to see what’s up.

Indulge In Taboo Fantasies

Everyone has different sex fantasies, and some ladies may have a sex fantasy that is a little more taboo than what she or her partner is willing to actually do. Porn can be a great way to indulge in taboo or secret sex fantasies that you aren’t ready to try yet. Fetish videos are popular ways to indulge in a fetish that you want to keep hidden, like a diaper fetish or other uncommon fetishes. Skin flicks are also a great way to experience a sex fantasy for the first time without jumping right in with both feet.

See What Her Man Is Watching Behind Her Back

Girls will often catch their guy watching or looking at porn, or they may stumble across it unexpectedly while their partner is at work. She may throw it away or delete it, but chances are, she’s going to take a look at it first. Why? She wants to see exactly what is getting her lover off behind her back.

Why Women Don’t Want To Watch Porn

The far majority of girls actually choose not to look at adult movies, but probably not for reasons you might think. If a woman absolutely hates naughty films or would rather read an erotic novel than check out a skin flick, here’s why:

The Male Actors Aren’t Physically Attractive

A big penis isn’t all that a woman is interested in. Most adult movie actors are chosen for their penis size, not for their facial features or even the attractiveness of the rest of her body. While physical looks aren’t always what attract a woman to a guy, eye candy is important when you’re watching a skin flick. However, the porn industry mostly caters to guys in this respect, because many of the females featured in adult films are good looking with hot bodies. Not so much with the guys in nudie films.

They Deem It Disrespectful

The far majority of girls that choose not to look at porn do so because they feel like it’s disrespectful towards the female gender. Many adult movies do feature girls in compromising sex positions and doing compromising things, but not all of them. Some adult films – especially the less “hardcore” ones – will actually convey a woman in a very positive way.

The Plot…Wait, What Plot?

For a woman to become turned on, she usually has to be engaged mentally as well as physically. This is often the problem with adult movies, because while many adult film producers struggle to give a film at least some kind of plot, they generally don’t do a good job of it. Pizza delivery boy or dishwasher repairman sex? Most girls aren’t going to find that attractive, let alone believable.

It Just Doesn’t Do It For Her

Since females generally need mental stimulation to get turned on, the visual stimulation offered in skin flicks may just not do it for a girl. Why would she want to check out a sub-par porn when she can read an erotic novel and let her imagination take off – turning her on much, much more than a simple movie ever could.

She’s Insecure About Her Body

Ladies that don’t have high self esteem or are insecure about their bodies may not want to watch adult films and they may even get upset when their partner watches it. Adult movie actresses are often very glamorized in skin flicks, with the right lighting, lingerie and makeup to make them look their best. Porn actresses will often have had plastic surgery of some kind, especially breast augmentation or liposuction or tummy tucks. This can be very intimidating for a real woman to watch, even if she looks gorgeous.

She Has An Ample Supply Of Erotic Novels

Most girls just aren’t going to get off by watching a nudie film. It’s as simple as that. A woman that has an ample supply of erotic novels is probably not going to need to look at a skin flick at all.

Advanced Masturbation Techniques – Using Sex Toys

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 01 Mar 2011 14:00:30 +0000

Let’s face it – masturbation can get boring if you’re doing the same thing over and over. Many men and women feel as though masturbation is meant to be “quick and dirty,” and as a result, they don’t use sex toys or lube to make masturbation better. Take it up a notch by experimenting with different sex toys during masturbation. Sex toys can create different sensations and better orgasms, and they can also be used with your partner during sex. Here are some advanced masturbation techniques to try if you want to spice up your solo time.

Most People Start Out Masturbating With Their Hands

Because most boys and girls start experimenting with masturbation during their pre-teen years, they usually start out by using their hands to touch themselves and figure out what feels good. Because you have to be 18 or older to purchase sex toys, most younger boys and girls use their hands simply because there is nothing else available to try.

Does that mean you should continue using your hands only during masturbation as an adult man or woman? Of course not! Part of the fun of being an adult is having the ability to try new things in the bedroom, such as watching porn or experimenting with sex toys. Here’s a guide on which sex toys to use for what (for both guys and gals) while you’re masturbating.

Ladies: Try A Rabbit Vibrator

Most women finger themselves during masturbation or use a slim dildo or simple vibrator for insertion. If you’re looking to take it up a notch, try purchasing a Rabbit vibrator. Many women that start using Rabbit vibrators won’t go back! Here’s what Rabbit vibrators have to offer:

A “dildo” end that is usually curved to stimulate the g-spot. In many models, the end will vibrate and rotate for extra pleasure.
Rotating pearls or beads that stimulate the sensitive areas just inside the vaginal opening
An attachment on the front with a separate bullet vibe that stimulates the clitoris
Some models have attachments on the back for anal probing and stimulation
Rabbit vibrators have a variety of speeds and sensations for customized pleasure

Ladies: Try Using Butt Plugs Or Anal Beads During Masturbation

Many women enjoy anal sex and would like to incorporate anal play during their own masturbation sessions but aren’t sure how or what toys to get. Fortunately, adding anal pleasure to masturbation is easy with the variety of anal sex toys that are available at adult toy stores both online and off.

A small butt plug with a flared end or finger loop is perfect if you’re just getting started or enjoy anal stimulation but don’t want to use something extra large. If you are into something bigger, there are lots of sizes available so you can work your way up in size. You definitely want to start small and then go bigger so your body can get used to it. Remember to use lots and lots of good, water based lube (never, ever desensitizing lube) and stop if it hurts.

Guys: Use Lube

Believe it or not, there are a lot of guys do not use lube when masturbating! Younger boys who are learning to masturbate typically do not use lube because it isn’t available, however, lots of guys still aren’t using lube even well into their adult life. Lube is essential for a great orgasm during masturbation! Some guys use lotion, saliva or soap, but they just don’t cut it when it comes to using what actually feels best.

Silicone lube is excellent for masturbating with your hands because it doesn’t wear off or dry out as quickly as water based lube can, but if you’re masturbating with sex toys or condoms, silicone lube can break them down if they’re made of latex. Water based lubricant is safe for every activity. Just about every guy that starts using lube during masturbation says they’ll never go back to lotion again!

Guys: Use A Masturbation Sleeve

Masturbation sleeves are probably the best invention for male masturbation ever, next to lube. Masturbation sleeves are generally made out of silicone or latex and are made to slip over the penis and moved back and forth while masturbation. Here’s why masturbation sleeves are much, much better than using your hands:

When combined with lube, they slip and slide over the penis creating orgasmic sensations
The inside of male masturbators are textured or ribbed (and there are hundreds of different kinds) to increase pleasure
Many models flip completely inside out for easy cleaning while others are disposable
They are the closest you’ll get to the real feeling of sex or a blowjob during masturbation

Guys: Using Cock Rings

Cock rings are an excellent sex toy to use during both masturbation and sex with a partner. A cock ring is designed to slip over the penis and stay at the base of it, trapping blood in the head and shaft and keeping the penis rock hard. This can be used during masturbation to enhance sensations and to prolong orgasm.

Make sure when purchasing cock rings to choose flexible ones. Hard plastic and metal cock rings exist, but they are far less than safe because they can get stuck at the base of the penis by causing the head and shaft to swell so much that it becomes impossible to remove the cock ring without immediate medical intervetion. Flexible cock rings are much, much safer! They come in lots of fun colors (even glow in the dark) and many of them are textured for extra sensations.

Guys: Toys For Anal Stimulation

Lots of guys enjoy anal play during sex or masturbation because the stimulation of the prostate gland from inside the anus can intensify orgasms immensely. This can be done with a number of sex toys, including small, slim vibrators, butt plugs, anal beads and prostate massagers.

There are definitely guys out there that are squeamish about putting anything up their anus, but not to worry – the prostate gland can be stimulated by putting firm pressure on the perineum (the space between a man’s anus and his scrotum). Try laying a strong vibrator on your perineum and massaging it to stimulate the prostate gland.

Remember to use lots and lots of water based lube (do not use it sparingly!) when using any type of anal sex toy or even when using your finger for anal play! This makes anal play much, much more pleasurable and decreases the risk of any kind of tearing or tissue damage!

Alone On Valentines Day? Hot Masturbation Tips For Him AND Her

Kaylen Jackson — Thu, 10 Feb 2011 23:00:46 +0000

Flying solo on Valentine’s Day doesn’t mean that you have to spend the night moping around about how you’re not gettin’ any. Instead, why not plan to get some – with yourself? Plan an evening of pleasure for yourself, whether it’s watching your favorite porn flick or taking a hot bath and relaxing before breaking out a new vibrator. Here are some excellent ways you can get busy by yourself on Valentine’s Day!

Grab An Erotic Movie Or Book

For Him: Rent, buy or download a new porn with your favorite star in it, or indulge yourself in a fetish movie that you haven’t gotten around to checking out yet. Men love visual stimulation, so lock your doors and turn on the tube. You can also check out free porn on websites like YouPorn. Either way, just make sure you get your mind in the mood with whatever turns you on the most. Make sure you have your masturbation tools nearby in case you can’t hold out through the whole movie!

For Her: Visit your local sex toy store for an erotic novel or two, or order them online. Heck, you can even find free erotic stories online with just a simple Internet search. While men are visual creatures and enjoy watching sex, most women prefer to have their imaginations stimulated with an erotic novel. Don’t just re-read one of your steamy romance novels though – this Valentine’s Day, treat yourself to something really naughty. You’ll be surprised at how much better your masturbation can be after just a few erotic stories!

Purchase A Sex Toy Just For The Occasion

For Him: There are a lot of guys out there that are still stuck in the hand and lotion “stone age.” There are lots of hot sex toys for boys available at both traditional sex toy stores and their online counterparts. Male sex toys come in a variety of different styles, colors, textures and sizes to accommodate every man’s desires. Masturbation sleeves are among the most popular sex toys for guys, whether it’s a “Fleshlight” modeled after a real vagina or a simple pink silicone sleeve that feels absolutely divine with a few squirts of lube. Consider purchasing a new sex toy before the big day and save it for that special night. You’ll feel the difference right away!

For Her: Thinking about busting out your tried and true vibrator for a quickie masturbation session on Valentine’s Day? Think again. Order a brand new dildo or bullet vibe (or whatever else tickles your fancy) and save it for the 14th.

Relax In A Hot Bath

For Him: You may think it’s sissy for guys to want to relax in a hot bath, but don’t underestimate the power that hot water, bubbles, steam and aromatherapy can do to relax your body and your mind. Especially if you’ve had a particularly long or difficult day at work, it’s important to clear your mind of everything that happened that day and start getting yourself in the mood and thinking about sex. Stroke yourself a few times in the bath, or think about something really arousing to get yourself ready.

For Her: Every woman loves a good, long soak in a hot bath. Take this to heart on Valentine’s Day and plan to take a long bath before your masturbation session. Make it special by adding some new, great smelling bath oils or salts, or light your favorite scented candles and add some rose petals to the water. The idea behind doing this on Valentine’s Day is to treat yourself right and make yourself feel special when you’re spending the evening alone. After your bath, make sure to put on some decadently rich body lotion and enjoy the feel of your silky smooth skin.

Go Slow And Take Your Time

For Him: Most of the time when guys masturbate, they do it in a hurry. As kids, guys had to “hurry up” before Mom came home, and even as adults, husbands have to “make it quick” before the wife catches them. If you’re spending February 14th by yourself, there’s no reason to rush your masturbation. Lock your doors, draw the blinds and take as much time with yourself as you need to make it really spectacular.

For Her: Some women naturally take their time during masturbation, simply because it takes several minutes for a woman to get warmed up, but others have got masturbation down pat and can reach orgasm in three minutes or less. If you’re used to quickie masturbation, make sure to slow it down on Valentine’s Day. This isn’t about “getting the job done” and masturbation doesn’t have to be a means to an end. Take time to enjoy yourself and really savor the way everything feels.

Multiple Orgasms? Yes, Please!

For Him: Can men really have multiple orgasms! Absolutely! While most men aren’t necessarily going to have multiple orgasms in quick succession like a woman can, most men can cool down in a period of about 15-25 minutes and get started again. Why not make Valentine’s Day night last all night long?

For Her: It’s a little easier for women to have multiple orgasms than it is for men. Women are like ovens – it takes some time for them to warm up but once they’re hot, they stay that way for a little while. When a woman reaches orgasm, she doesn’t go all the way back down to the starting point. She’s actually very close to having another. Take advantage of the way your body works and don’t stop after just the first orgasm. You may even want to try to have as many orgasms as you can – you might just set a Valentine’s Day record!

How To Get Your Girlfriend To Masturbate For You

Kaylen Jackson — Fri, 07 Jan 2011 14:00:14 +0000

So you want her to masturbate, and you want her to masturbate in front of you. Question is, how do you get her to do it? Some women are cool with talking about masturbation, but some women just aren’t comfortable clicking their own mouse, let alone talking about it with their lovers. Whether your girl does enjoys flying solo or has never tried it before, watching her get her freak on by herself is something that can entice both of you and make your sex life hotter. Here’s how you can convince her to masturbate – and then do it in front of you!

Tell Her You Want To Watch

Very few women want to watch men masturbate – so telling her that you want to watch her do it may sound unbelievable to her at first. She may think it’s a crazy idea, or that you’re trying to manipulate her in some way so that you can scrutinize her. Of course this isn’t true, but getting her to believe that the idea of watching her masturbate for you is a huge turn on is a different story all together. Try some dirty talk in the bedroom next time you and your lover have sex. While you’re touching her clitoris, let her know how much it would turn you on to see her touch it. Start small and work your way up to the big stuff. She may only start out with letting you watch her play with herself a little, but with constant encouragment and enthusiasm on your part, it won’t be very long before she’s giving you a show.

Give Her Some Assistance During Foreplay

While you’re fingering her or giving her oral sex, place your hand over hers and take it along for the ride. Slowly rub her breasts, hips and lower stomach with your hand underneath hers so she can feel what you feel when you’re having sex with her. Look into her eyes and show her how hot it makes you when you see her touch herself. As you move your hand down to her vagina, let her take the lead once you feel she is sufficiently turned on to keep going. Again, you want to do this slowly because if you move too fast, you could freak her out. You want to let her take the lead and go however fast or slow she wants to. You can also join in and touch her breasts, her buttocks or finger her vagina while she touches her clitoris. If she wants to fly completely solo while you watch though, you can masturbate on your own while you watch her do it!

Masturbate With Her

It’s no problem if you get so turned on by watching her play with herself that you have to touch yourself also. This will actually encourage her to do more! Sit in a chair by the bed, watching her masturbate while she watches you. If you or your partner want it to be less of a “spectator sport” and more intimate, try laying next to each other on the bed, facing each other. Ask her if she likes watching you masturbate as much as you like watching her. Remind her over and over that you absolutely love what she’s doing and simply can’t help but play with yourself! If you still have a hard time getting her to really let go and masturbate for you, try touching yourself while you give her cunnilingus. Let her know that you find her vagina extremely sexy. If she believes that you really enjoy licking it, sucking it and looking at it, she won’t be as self concious about revealing all in front of you.

Dirty Talk

The real secret to getting her to touch herself for you is to talk to her the entire time and let her know how much it really turns you on. Don’t be afraid to be vocal about it, whether it’s groaning while giving yourself a handjob while she masturbates or telling her with words exactly what you like to see. If you make it absolutely clear that watching her touch herself is what makes you super hot and horny, she’ll end up being more than willing to do it for you. Try asking her for a tutorial on how she does it herself, or try directing each move that she makes and have her touch herself where you tell her to. Get creative and most of all, remember to have fun with it. If she’s still uncomfortable with the idea of masturbating in front of you, let it go until she’s ready to do it.

Best Masturbation Techniques Of 2010

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 21 Dec 2010 14:00:58 +0000

Men get a bad rap for masturbation but let’s face it – women do it to, and masturbation actually isn’t all that bad. It has a reputation for being “taboo,” due to society and some cultures believing that it’s “wrong.” In fact, ridiculous rumors still circulate about boys that masturbate will go blind or grow hair on their palms!

As society evolves, however, we’re learning that masturbating is really a healthy part of anyone’s sex life and both men and women can benefit from masturbating. In fact, regular masturbation can do lots of things such as relieve stress and prevent premature ejaculation and unwanted erections. It can also be a part of building a strong sexual relationship with your significant other. Couples who are open about masturbating and masturbate separately and together will have a stronger and more satisfying sexual relationship with each other than couples who are afraid of masturbation or do it in secret.

People who are single and don’t have a sex partner don’t have to make masturbation quick and dirty – it too can be as physically satisfying as having sex with someone (and sometimes even better!) There are lots of ways for men and women to fly solo (both with sex toys and without), but not everyone knows how to really click their own mouse. We’ve done tons of articles on masturbating this year, but here are our best masturbation tips of 2010 for boys and girls!

Q&A: Masturbation – Does It Make Sex Better?

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 15 Nov 2010 14:00:58 +0000

Just about everyone masturbates, starting from when they’re a teenager and continuing on into their adult life. It is perfectly healthy and normal for both men and women to masturbate regularly, but the question is, does it help improve your sex life? Does masturbating when you’re young make sex better when you’re older and does it also help make your sex life better when you’re alternating between having sex and pleasuring yourself?

How Masturbation Can Make Sex Worse – For Guys

When guys are growing up, they tend to learn how to masturbate and give themselves an orgasm in secret. In many cultures, where masturbation is taboo or considered “wrong,” nobody talks about how to masturbate or when to masturbate. As a result, many young men learn how to masturbate the wrong way and end up teaching their body the wrong things – and this will actually make your sex life worse when you do start to have sex. Usually, young men will masturbate in secret and do it quickly for fear of being caught – quite literally – with their pants down. This trains the body to reach orgasm too quickly, and can lead to problems with premature ejaculation when a man gets older and begins having sex. This can cause problems in a sexual relationship, because the sex just isn’t lasting long enough and his partner will often have to go without sexual satisfaction because there just wasn’t enough time before he reached climax.

How Guys – And Girls – Can Use Masturbation As A Sexual Training Tool

When done correctly, masturbation can be a great sexual training tool for both girls and guys. For guys, masturbating the right way can help him learn when he’s about to reach climax and teach him how to control his orgasm. When a man learns how to control his orgasm through masturbation, it will also allow him to control his orgasm during sex and better please his partner. To do this, go slow when masturbating. Get close to orgasm and back off a bit. Do this again and again until you’ve lasted as long as you can. Female masturbation will also help a woman learn more about her body and her sexuality. When a woman explores masturbation freely, she will learn how she likes to be touched and exactly where her hot spots are. This will help her to reach orgasm more easily during sex! Many girls who have never masturbated have actually never had an orgasm – simply because she’s not quite sure of how to get there. Guys in relationships with girls who have never masturbated can be equally as frustrated, because if she doesn’t know where and how to touch herself to have an orgasm, how is he supposed to know? If as a young guy or girl, you didn’t learn how to masturbate the right way, don’t worry too much about it. You can actually teach yourself to masturbate the right way right now!

Masturbation Is A Great Stress Reliever

Of course, having an orgasm is a huge stress reliever. That’s why people enjoy sex so much! Not only does it feel good while you’re doing it, but the body produces so many feel good hormones during sex that you’re definitely going to ride a “sex high” well after you’ve finished getting it on. Does this mean that if you’re single or aren’t having much sex with your partner that you are going to miss out on all the great benefits of having sex? Not hardly! Masturbation will create the same great after-sex feelings that sex does, because it’s simply a physiological response to the body having an orgasm. Masturbation will relieve stress much the same way that sex does, and can make you feel more confident in yourself and super sexy. Instead of using masturbation to “get off quickly” though, spend some time with yourself making yourself feel good. This will not only make your sex life better, it will also help get you in tune with your own sexuality. Make masturbation better by watching your favorite porn flick, or reading a steamy, erotic novel that really turns you on. Girls, touch your clitoris slowly, or use more lube if that is what feels good. Guys, the more lube you use, the better. Water based lube functions much better for masturbation than lotion or other substances. If you use masturbation to your advantage, you can make your sex life much, much hotter – whether you’re waiting to have sex or in a sexual relationship right now.

Masturbation – 3 Ways To Make It Feel More Like A Vagina

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 24 Oct 2010 14:00:34 +0000

If guys masturbate often (and they do) it’s not at all unusual for the same masturbation techniques to get boring. You’d like to create some different feelings, perhaps try to recreate the feeling of a vagina or just all out make your orgasms through masturbationbetter than you’ve ever had before. Here are some great things to try if you want to spice up your masturbation routine and create vagina-like sensations with using sex toys or some things you have at home!

Question: Recently, masturbating has been getting very boring for me. What are some ways I can get the feeling of a vagina to my penis while masturbating (without any sex toys)?

–YouTube Viewer

Using Enough Lube

Some men masturbate without lube, and others don’t use enough. If you’re masturbating with out lube, it’s time to go get you a bottle stat! The right sexual lubricant – and enough of it – will make masturbation feel so much better than if you’re not using lube at all. Lube the single most important component of male masturbation and if you want to recreate the feeling of a warm, wet vagina, lube is going to be your best friend. In fact, a generous amount of lube may be all you need to take your masturbation to the next level! For male masturbation, silicone lube is probably your best bet, although water based lubricant is great and works well for just about anything. Silicone lube does last a little bit longer and is slightly more difficult to wash off, but that’s not usually an issue because the penis is so easy to clean.

Using Different Hand Techniques

Try using both hands when you masturbate instead of just one, or grip your penis with one hand and lay face down on the bed, thrusting into your hand as you would if you were thrusting into a woman’s vagina. The latter, with a good amount of lube, can feel warm and wet, just like a vagina. By using your body to move your penis in and out of your hand (instead of the other way around) you’re recreating the feeling of having sex rather than just masturbating. Don’t be afraid to try different hand techniques when masturbating because even the simplest change in how you hold your hand, how tight you grip it or which fingers you’re using can make all the difference in the world!

Using A Condom And A Warm Towel

Another trick to recreate the feeling of a vagina during masturbation without using sex toys is to use a condom, lube and a warm (not hot) towel. Squirt a generous amount of lube in the condom and then put the condom on your penis. Using a condom that is a little larger than your penis may benefit you here, although you would want to switch to properly fitting condoms when you have sex. You can also use a female condom if you like. Wrap a warm towel around your penis after you put the condom on, and grip the warm towel and move it back and forth when you masturbate. This is a great way to recreate the “warm, wet” feeling of a vagina. There are lots of other homemade sex toys that men have tried, such as using an empty paper towel or toilet paper roll or other items found around the house. Talk about ouch! That’s why many men choose to use male sex toys for masturbation instead of using items found around the house – it just works so much better!

Masturbating With Sex Toys

Sex toys are often used for female masturbation, but there are lots of sex toys for boys that are available too! Male masturbators are often made from soft, squishy silicone that is formed into a sleeve that slips over the penis. With a good amount of lube, the silicone sleeves create multiple sensations during masturbation. Many male masturbators are smooth and squishy, while others have textured or ribbed insides for his pleasure. If you’ve never tried using a sex toy for masturbation, you might want to consider it. There’s nothing embarassing about using the right sex toy for what you want to do, and male masturbators can take your orgasms to the next level. Most sex toys for boys are inexpensive and easy to use, even if you’ve never used one before. Many men who use a male masturbator have never gone back to regular masturbation with their hand because the sex toy just feels so good!

Q&A: Masturbation – How Do Virgin Girls Masturbate?

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 19 Oct 2010 14:00:37 +0000

Most women masturbate, but do all women do it the same way? Do all women enjoy the same things during masturbation? Of course not. Each woman has her own preferences when it comes to what feels good during masturbation. However, a seemingly big difference to the way girls masturbate is whether they’re a virgin or not. But is this really a difference, or is it just a common misconception? Do virgin girls masturbate differently from girls who have had sex before, or do they do it the same way?

Virgin Girls Masturbate The Same Way Non-Virgin Girls Do

Masturbation is actually pretty simple. You do whatever feels good and you keep doing it until you reach orgasm, or multiple orgasms. So in a nutshell, almost every woman masturbates similarly, whether they’re a virgin or not. However, the specifics may differ depending on what each woman likes, but the end goal is really the same regardless of virginity status (or any other status, really). Since every woman likes to be pleasured differently, each woman will use her own techniques or sex toys to pleasure herself. Some girls who are virgins choose to masturbate by stimulating and touching their clitoris only and choosing not to use any type of vaginal penetration, while other virgins do both. Some women who are not virgins will still stimulate their clitoris only during masturbation (because that’s what feels good to them) while others will use vaginal penetration only or both. Still other women, both virgins and non-virgins alike, will also incorporate anal stimulation into their masturbation if that’s what they enjoy. How you masturbate depends only on what you enjoy, not whether you’ve had sex before or not.

How Masturbating Can Help You With Great Sex Later In Life

Masturbation now, whether you’re a virgin or not, will help you have better sex later in life. Masturbation also helps women with active sex lives have better sex too! Through masturbation, women learn what feels good and what doesn’t – essential information that they definitely need to pass on to their guy when they have sex. Women who don’t masturbate have a more difficult time figuring out what they like and don’t like during sex and often this will frustrate their partner to no end. Many women who don’t masturbate have never had an orgasm and aren’t able to with their guy! Masturbation isn’t something to be embarassed about, because it’s a completely natural way to learn more about your body and what you like and don’t like. If you’ve never tried masturbating before – whether you’re a virgin or not – there are lots of resources that can help you get started. Women who masturbate notice that they’re often in a better mood and can handle stress more easily than if they weren’t sexually satisfied. Women who masturbate also say that their men enjoy sex with them better too, because it’s not as difficult for their guys to pleasure them in bed!

What To Do If It Hurts

Both sex and masturbation can hurt or be uncomfortable, especially if you’re a virgin, but that doesn’t mean that it is completely normal or that it is always going to hurt or be uncomfortable. If you’re masturbating for the first time and notice some discomfort during vaginal penetration the first few times, that’s probably nothing to worry about. The same goes for first time sex – it may be uncomfortable or slightly painful the first few times. It is also common for women to bleed the first time they experience vaginal penetration, be it through sex or masturbation. You can also bleed slightly during sex or masturbation if you’re getting ready to start your period or are having particularly rough sex or masturbation. However, if you continue to experience bleeding or discomfort during either of these activities, it’s important to talk to your doctor. If you’re too embarassed to see your doctor about masturbation or sex, it’s essential that you find a doctor that you are comfortable enough to talk to about your body. Don’t stress too much about it, because doctors have seen and heard just about everything and there’s really nothing to be embarassed about when it comes to taking care of your body. Your doctor is there to help you! Be sure to let your doctor know that you’ve been masturbating or having sex and how you’ve been doing it or what you’ve been using to masturbate so your doctor can accurately assess what is going on with your bod.

Why Every Girl Needs Her Own Sex Toy

Kaylen Jackson — Thu, 14 Oct 2010 14:00:43 +0000

Believe it or not, many girls don’t own a sex toy. Some girls own sex toys that they use only with their partners, but many others don’t have a sex toy for their own personal use at all! Some women have never even tried masturbation alone! Sex toys can greatly improve the quality, frequency and intensity of a woman’s orgasms both with the sex toy and without it when having sex with a partner. There are also many other benefits to using a sex toy, so here’s why every girl needs her very own!

Sex Toys And Masturbation Make Orgasms Better

If you’ve never had an orgasm before, or your orgasms are few and far between when having sex with your partner, it’s time to invest in a great sex toy. This is especially true if you’ve never masturbated before! If you’re using a sex toy during masturbation, you will find that your orgasms come more frequently, as well as being more powerful and intense. Masturbation, even without a sex toy, helps to train your body to experience pleasure and reach orgasm without the stress and pressure of trying to reach climax with your partner. Many women who have never had an orgasm before aren’t ever going to reach their first orgasm in front of their partners because the stress and pressure to perform is just too much. Female masturbation can help a woman find her body’s own pleasure buttons without feeling like she’s being watched or being expected to reach climax. When a woman gives herself time to explore her body on her own with a sex toy, she is more likely to reach orgasm – and it’s probable that her orgasm will be absolutely incredible!

Why Your Partner Will Love Your New Sex Toy

When a woman masturbates, she learns more about how her body works and how she likes to recieve pleasure. This is excellent information that she can pass on to her partner! Women who have never masturbated or used a sex toy before have absolutely no idea what they like best sexually or what will bring them to climax. They don’t know how they like to be touched or even what feels good! How can a man know what a woman wants or likes if she doesn’t even know herself? Women who don’t masturbate essentially send their partners into sex blind, and they can only guess how she wants to be pleased. When she doesn’t reach orgasm (how could she?) he ends up feeling like he has failed her in some way, even though he tried his very best. Even guys who know just about everything there is to know about a female orgasm may not be able to make his girl reach climax if she’s never masturbated before. When a woman masturbates, however - especially if she uses a sex toy – she’ll learn about what she likes and how she likes it. She’ll show her partner her new discoveries and he’ll be inspired to use the same techniques to give her an orgasm during sex! So while many women believe that masturbating alone and using a sex toy is detrimental to their sexual relationship with their partners, quite the opposite is true. Using a sex toy and masturbating on your own will actually help make your sex life with your partner even hotter!

Which Sex Toy To Choose?

Of course, your first time sex toy shopping is going to seem a little overwhelming. There are so many different toys to choose from that offer so many different types of sensations. It’s easy to get lost or confused when selecting your first sex toy. There are, however, a few simple guidelines you can use to help narrow down the selection. You definitely don’t want to choose a giant double ended dildo, anal beads or anything of that nature. If you want to go for vaginal penetration, choose a sleek, slim dildo or vibrator instead. If you want to go for clitoral stimulation only, select a vibrator that is made specifically to be used on the clitoris only. While many people claim that getting used to using a vibrator to reach orgasm will train your body to only be able to reach climax with vibration, sporadic use can actually help you learn how your body goes through the stages of pleasure and orgasm. If you’re not sure whether you want to go with a vibrator or not, try getting a small, inexpensive toy that vibrates and one that doesn’t. That way, you can find out for yourself which one you like the best.

How To Give An Orgasm To A Girl Who Doesn’t Like Clitoral Stimulation

Lee Jenkins — Sun, 10 Oct 2010 14:00:29 +0000

All the women you asked (or went out with) told you that the clitoris is the magic button that you need to knead and fondle if you want any girl to have an orgasm. But what if the woman you’re dating now doesn’t like clitoral stimulation? You must think something’s wrong with her brain but it’s a fact that a lot of ladies out there are too “clitorally sensitive“ to like the sensation of clitoral stimulation. For these women, they feel more pain than pleasure when the clitoris is rubbed, touched or licked.

So, what can you do? Here are some suggestions…

Stimulate Her Nipples During Penetration

The purpose of clitoral stimulation during penetration is to give a woman another variation of sexual pleasure on top of the sensation of being entered. But the clitoris is not the only place that’s susceptible to touching during sex.

There’s another part of her body that’s within reach during sex, her nipples. You can touch or lick her nipples while she’s on top, or you can touch them when you’re in doggy mode or missionary. Remember that a woman likes it when you lick her nipples during foreplay and she might even have a short orgasm called a “nip-gasm” (a burst of sensation during nipple stimulation) if you do it right. That sensation, when added to the sensation she feels while you’re penetrating her will send her reeling.

Watch Her Masturbate

Female masturbation is very different for a woman that doesn’t like clitoral stimulation as compared to masturbation for a woman who depends on clitoral stimulation to climax. Face the mirror while you’re penetrating her from behind and watch how she touches herself down there. Moreover, learn from what you observe. Some women dislike touching the clitoris directly because of sensitivity issues, but they may touch other parts.

Some women would gently pinch the cheeks of the outer lips (labia majora) inward to rub against each other in a rhythmic manner. This is a logical way to stimulate the clitoris without touching it directly. Some women may press their whole palm on the mound or just below the abdomen when penetration starts to induce indirect clitoral pressure. Or she may use a dildo or vibrator to access her g-spot instead of her clitoris. Observe her and get a clue. Then, on your next round, you can do it for her.

Remember that not all women are into clitoral stimulation. Although, the majority of women like it, there may be some women who don’t. The thing is, it’s not something you can just ask outright over dinner. You have to tread lightly during foreplay and observe her reaction when your fingers find their way to her clitoris. The good old formula of “touch her clitoris” may work most of the time, but you need a plan B just in case the girl is not into that.

Q&A: Masturbation – How Can I Make Myself Squirt?

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 01 Jul 2010 14:00:22 +0000

Squirting is considered by many men and women to be the holy grail of female orgasms! Some people think it’s weird or gross, but others find it incredibly hot! If you’re ready to reach that next level with your orgasms, here are some things you can try so you can learn to squirt, both when you masturbate and during sex with a partner!

Question: I’ve now been trying to get to the ‘next level’ with myself, to female ejaculation. I have read and watched videos about it (inclusively on your website), but I just wanted to know if you had any tips or advice on how I can just let go. I get very excited when I masturbate and I’ve tried penetration and clitorial stimulation at the same time. When I come, it just won’t go that far, to female ejaculation. It sometimes leaves me feeling still just a little unsatisfied, even if I’d just had a mind blowing orgasm. Please give me your take on the subject!

–YouTube Viewer

Working With A Partner

If you’ve never squirted before, you may want to try doing it with a partner at first. It’s difficult to let go and completely surrender to the orgasm when you’re controlling your own pleasure. Allowing a partner to stimulate you to the point of orgasm lets you simply sit back and enjoy the ride! You’ll be able to concentrate more on the waves of pleasure you’re feeling, rather than concentrating on doing it harder or faster. Make sure you’re comfortable and with a partner that you’re comfortable with! Don’t try to squirt for the first time if you’re with someone who you’re not completely 1oo% comfortable with and honest with. If you’re with a new partner, wait until you have been with them sexually for some time. Chances are, you won’t be able to let go enough to have female ejaculation if you’re with a new partner anyways.

Manual Stimulation

The best way to acheive squirting for the first time is through manual stimulation. Whether you’re using a sex toy or your partner is using his hands, it is much more effective for squirting than oral sex or penile penetration. Even more effective at creating squirting is both clitoral and g-spot stimulation! This often will cause you to lose control more easily than through just one or the other. However, it is the g-spot orgasms that will cause you to squirt, so if you’re not at least stimulating the g-spot, you’re not going to achieve your goal. Rabbit vibrators are excellent for squirting orgasms, as they give both the g-spot and the clitoris intense stimulation and pleasure.

What Does It Feel Like?

When you’re ready to squirt, it may feel a little like you have to urinate. You may feel the need to “bear down” as though you’re delivering a baby, but that’s because all the muscles down there do everything. They are used when you urinate, have a baby, have sex, have a bowel movement, and have an orgasm. So it may feel like you’re getting ready to do all of those things! When you feel the need to bear down, go with the flow. Instead of fighting it, which many women do because they’re afraid of doing something embarrassing, ride it out. Give it your all. Allow yourself to totally go over the edge. You may not squirt the first time or even after dozens of times trying, but as you learn how your muscles act and react and practice letting go completely, you’ll eventually learn to squirt.

Q&A: Is It Normal To Get Random Erections During The Day?

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 27 Jun 2010 14:00:39 +0000

Getting unwanted unwanted erections during the day – especially when you’re not doing or thinking about anything sexual at all – can be a burden for many boys in their teenage years. What is normal when it comes to getting frequent erections and what can you do to stop it from happening?

Question: Dear Dan and Jennifer, I was wondering if it is normal to get random erections during the school day, and is there anything I can do to prevent it? Please help. Thanks, and I love your show.

–YouTube Viewer

The Role Teenage Hormones Play

Both teenage girls and boys have an abundance of hormones that are coursing through their body at any given time. The body is going through major changes during this stage and life and teenage hormones can cause lots of strange things to happen to the body. Almost all teenagers notice an increase in sweat, odor and acne, while teenage girls may notice their breasts becoming larger and will be starting their periods. Teenage boys, on the other hand, can experience erections at a variety of different times. Many boys experience “wet dreams” where the penis becomes hard and ejaculates during the night. Boys may also experience erections during the day, even when they’re not doing or thinking about anything sexual at all. This is completely normal and due to the increased hormones that boys experience during their teenage years.

Masturbation Can Reduce The Number Of Unwanted Erections

To reduce the amount of unwanted erections, masturbation can help. By masturbating, a young boy is releasing many of the hormones that are causing his erections in the first place and this will help keep the penis from becoming hard so often. Masturbate in the morning before school to try to prevent erections during the day, or try doing it in the evening. Masturbate at a variety of different times during the day to find out which time will reduce unwanted erections the most. Just be careful not to focus too much on masturbation. If you find that you’re always thinking about masturbation or planning your activities around your masturbation times too much, you may be addicted. Other than a serious masturbation addiction, masturbation is a normal and healthy way for teenage boys to relieve sexual tension and reduce unwanted erections.

Have Patience

Being a teenager is tough. There are so many awkward emotions and body functions that are involved during the teenage years for both boys and girls. It may seem like there’s no end in sight, but these problems won’t last forever. As you grow up, your body will produce less hormones and your emotions and body functions will level out. Don’t worry so much about it, because right now, everyone is going through the same things that you are. Everyone has issues during their teenage years, and lots of teenage boys experience unwanted erections and masturbate daily or almost daily. Avoid making fun of others for something that happens to you too! Have patience and know that this is a common, normal thing that happens to almost every teenage boy. Take comfort in the fact that you know it’s not going to last forever.

Q&A: Masturbation – Why Is It Taking So Long To Reach Orgasm?

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 24 May 2010 14:00:16 +0000

Reaching orgasm through masturbation is often easier for both men and women than it is reaching orgasm through intercourse or oral sex. That said, when it takes longer than usual to reach climax through masturbation, you may wonder if something is wrong with you. Here’s what to do if all of a sudden you notice it’s taking you significantly longer to get off when going solo.

Question: I am 15 and I masturbate often and only a week ago it on average took about 20 minutes to reach orgasm. All of a sudden starting the other night, it takes me approximately 1.5 – 2.5 hours, I didn’t change anything about the way I go about masturbating, so I am really confused as to this sudden jump, is this normal?

–YouTube Viewer

Changes In Your Life That Can Affect Masturbation

You may not have changed the way you masturbate at all, but other changes in your life can impact your ability to reach orgasm with masturbation and through intercourse and oral sex. Are you losing sleep or are you physically ill with a cold or perhaps the flu? Have you been super stressed out about something recently, such as a big test, moving or breaking up with your boyfriend or girlfriend? A lot of major life changes can affect how quickly you are able to reach orgasm, if at all. Fortunately, with most life situations, they are temporary and you will probably be able to get back to your normal masturbation routine once the stressor disappears.

Reaching Orgasm

Reaching orgasm, for both men and women, requires you to be calm, relaxed and have a clear mind. If you’re busy thinking about something that happened during the day or aren’t totally focused on the pleasure you’re giving yourself, it may take quite a bit longer for you to climax, or you may be unable to orgasm. This is especially true for women, but it can happen to men as well. If you’re not currently using visual stimulation during masturbation, give it a try. A picture, magazine or video may be all you need to distract your mind from day to day junk and instead allow you to focus on the task at hand – no pun intended.

Seeing Your Doctor

If you truly suspect something is wrong with your ability to reach orgasm through masturbation, and you can’t find any reason why masturbating is taking unusually longer than it has in the past, go see your doctor. You don’t have to be afraid to talk to your doctor about sex or masturbation, because your doctor knows all about it. They’ve seen and heard everything! If you’re not comfortable with your current doctor, don’t hesitate to find a doctor you are comfortable with. Talk to your doctor about what is going on and how it is a problem in your life. Your doctor can help find the causes of your inability to reach orgasm quickly through masturbation and find out if there is a true medical reason behind it or not. It never hurts to get an opinion from your doctor when you’re having an issue with your health – sexual or otherwise.

Q&A: How Can I Control My Excessive Masturbation Habit?

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 15 May 2010 14:40:38 +0000

Masturbation is normal for both men and women, as well as teens and young adults. It’s a healthy part of any sex life! But how often can you masturbate without it being “too much?” How do you know if you’re masturbating is getting excessive? Here’s how to control your masturbation if you find that getting off starts taking over your life.

Question: I am 17 years old and i think i am masturbating too much, like 3 times a day – 18 times a week or less! Please help me, how can I control myself?

–YouTube Viewer

Is The Indicator Of A Masturbation Addiction Really Frequency?

Many people are under the assumption that the real indicator of a masturbation addiction is how often you masturbate, but there are many people who masturbate several times per day or more and don’t have an addiction to it at all. So what is the real indicator of a masturbation addiction? Start digging deeper and asking yourself some important questions. Do you find that masturbation is taking over your life? Do you masturbate instead of doing other things that you enjoy doing, or do you masturbate instead of taking care of your responsibilities to yourself and others? The true indicator of a sex addiction is not how often you do it, but how it is affecting the other aspects of your life and the lives of those around you.

Why Do You Masturbate So Often?

Saying that you masturbate often only because it feels good or because you’re bored probably isn’t the real reason you are masturbating a lot. There are often emotional reasons behind frequent masturbation, such as being lonely or stressed, or having ended a relationship that was important to you. Daily masturbation makes a very effective escape mechanism, but it can quickly become addicting as you look to escape your problems more and more often. Think about what is going on in your life emotionally that may be causing you to masturbate excessively. Finding the actual root of the problem is one of the first steps to breaking the bad habit.

Breaking The Habit

If masturbation begins taking over your life and you fear you may have a very real sex addiction, it’s time to break the habit. Try using the “rubber band trick,” which involves wearing a rubber band around your wrist and snapping it when you begin to think of masturbating and then immediately thinking of something else. If you find that you masturbate at certain times during the day, try making plans to do other things during that time of the day instead. It won’t be easy, and it will take some real effort on your part. But it’s not impossible. If you’ve tried breaking the masturbation addiction on your own, don’t be afraid to ask for help from a qualified therapist or counselor with whom you feel comfortable with. Asking for help isn’t a sign of weakness, it’s actually the opposite. It takes a lot of strength to admit you have a problem, but it’s one of the first steps to real recovery.

Q&A: Does Masturbation Reduce Penis Sensitivity?

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 10 May 2010 14:00:03 +0000

As you get older, your body changes and mature in a variety of ways which sometimes can be a surprise. As you age, your sexual organs and libido change as well, and you might find yourself wanting more or less sex or finding that masturbation feels different than when you were younger. Other factors change genital sensitivity as well, such as medication or frequency of masturbation.

Question: Dear Dan and Jenn, I’ve been masturbating since I was 9 and since I turned 18, the the sensitivity of my penis started to change and now its takes me longer to reach orgasm. I wanted to know does masturbation reduce the sensitivity of the penis or is that the intensity of orgasm changes overtime as you get older?

–YouTube Viewer

Hormonal Changes

When you hit puberty, your hormones go into overdrive and you may find that your penis is extremely sensitive and can be aroused by even the smallest trigger. As you age, your body stops producing so many hormones and you’ll find that your penis isn’t as sensitive as it was when you were going through puberty. Although this sounds like it’s a bad thing (after all, who doesn’t want a sensitive penis) it’s actually a good thing. Did you really want to be getting erections at the wrong time throughout your life, or even suffering from premature ejaculation? The reduction of penis sensitivity as you get older is preparing you for a healthy and happy sex life in the future.

Frequency Of Masturbation

How often you masturbate plays a big part in how sensitive your penis is. If you masturbate only once a week or even less, you’ll find that your penis is more sensitive to other triggers. However, if you masturbate daily or even a few times a day, your penis isn’t going to respond to every little thing that touches it. This can actually be used to your advantage. If you want a more sensitive penis, masturbate less. Frequent masturbation helps prevent getting erections at the wrong time, and can be used before a first date or other event.

Other Factors That Change Penis Sensitivity

Other things that can change your penis sensitivity and sexual desire are prescription medications, illegal drugs and alcohol. These things can change your penis sensitivity very drastically, even to the point of making it difficult to get an erection or causing you to lose your erection when masturbating. It is not at all uncommon for prescription medications to change genital sensitivity and libido a great deal and if you suspect that your medications are to blame for a less sensitive penis or a reduced sex drive, talk to your doctor about it and find out if you can make a medication switch. Penis sensitivity can also change between intercourse and masturbation, or how long it’s been since you’ve had sex or masturbated. If you find that your penis is becoming drastically less sensitive and it is causing you to have problems in your sex life or with your partner, visit your doctor to rule out any medical causes.

Q&A: Losing Erection When Masturbating: Is That Normal?

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 09 Apr 2010 14:00:45 +0000

Many men have experienced the loss of their erection at one time or another, whether it was just once or twice or is a regular occurence. If you lose your erection during masturbation, does it mean you have erectile dysfunction? Here’s what to do if you find yourself going soft just when you want it to be hard.

Question: Is it normal for an erection to go down quickly if you stop masturbating?

–YouTube Viewer

Losing Your Arousal

Whether you’re having sex or masturbating, if you get distracted in some way or lose your arousal at all, it’s perfectly normal for your penis to lose its erection and become flaccid and soft. You might have just had a random picture of your mother in law pop into your head or the phone rang or someone came to the door and interrupted you. If you’ve stopped masturbating all of a sudden for some reason, you will most likely lose your erection if you don’t get back to it quick enough. The same goes for having sex. If you stop out of nowhere and stop giving your penis adequate stimulation, you will definitely go soft. You may go soft right away or it may take just a few minutes. Annoying, yes. Something you should be worried about? Absolutely not.

After Ejaculation

After you ejaculate, whether you’re having sex or masturbating, it’s normal for the penis to go soft pretty quickly. After ejaculation, your penis senses that its work is done and it doesn’t need to be at the ready anymore. Some men go soft pretty much right after having an orgasm, while others stay hard for just a little longer. Longer erections can occur with certain medications, including Viagra, even after you’ve ejaculated. If you experience a persistent erection for longer than 4 hours, call your doctor or go to the emergency room immediately.

Erectile Dysfunction

Erectile dysfunction is something that is more common among older men, but it can happen at any age. If you find your penis losing its erection during sex or masturbation, regardless of how much you stimulate it, you might have erectile dysfunction. Having ED doesn’t mean that your sex life is over – in fact, many men who have erectile dysfunction lead normal, healthy and satisfying sex lives. If you routinely have problems with your erection, it’s time for you to see your doctor. They can lead you in the right direction. Don’t worry about being embarassed - you won’t be their first case of erectile issues and you certainly won’t be their last. No question is silly or stupid and if you’re uncomfortable with your current doctor, see another one that you’re more comfortable talking about your erectile issues with. It’s important to find the root of the problem here, because erectile dysfunction can be caused by either physical or emotional problems or a mixture of both. Your doctor may refer you to a sex therapist or a more specialized doctor, or they may decide to treat you themselves. Either way, you don’t have to live with erectile problems. There are people out there who can help!

Q&A: Long Distance Sex Toys – a.k.a. Teledildonics

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 07 Apr 2010 14:00:37 +0000

With long distance relationships, one of the toughest obstacles is feeling physically intimate with your partner. Fortunately, with the advance of webcams and voice chat, you can feel like you’re in the same room as your partner! Here’s the newest technology for long distance sex toys, also known as teledildonics.

Question: Hey Dan and Jenn! Firstly, thanks for answering my last question. I’m in a long distance relationship at the moment – I’m in Denmark and my boyfriend is in Turkey. Our relationship is great and we fulfill our needs over webcam often, but I was wondering if there was any remote control sex toys that could work over that distance? I could send it to him and give him control over my sexual pleasure! I love your show and you both have always been very helpful to me, so thanks and have a wonderful day!

–YouTube Viewer

Advances In Sex Toy Technology

While remote control vibrators have been around for awhile, teledildonics hasn’t. Remote control vibrators are usually battery powered, and the remote has a very short receiving distance. These types of vibrators are great for spicing up sex play in the bedroom (or another room) with your partner but have no real application for long distance relationships. Teledildonics, on the other hand, allow partners over long distances to control each other’s sex toys over the Internet. Imagine being able to give your partner an orgasm from thousands of miles away!

Teledildonic Sex Toys For Her

In the future, we will see more options available for teledildonic sex toys, but right now the best toy out there for her is an Internet enabled rabbit vibrator. The rabbit vibrator is one of the most popular vibrators available for women, allowing for penetration, g-spot stimulation and clitoral tickling all in one. The Internet enabled rabbit allows your partner to control your vibrator from wherever he is. He can choose when to tickle your clit, when to stimulate your g-spot and how hard or fast he wants it to go. With this teledildonic sex toy, your orgasm is completely in the hands of your partner! This is an excellent option for couples in long distance relationships or those where one or both partners are away on business often.

Teledildonic Sex Toys For Him

The Real Touch teledildonic masturbator is one of the most revolutionary male masturbators available on the market. This device is designed to be used in conjunction with adult videos, and uses USB technology to sync the motions of the Real Touch with what the adult video star is doing onscreen. The Real Touch offers gentle heat to simulate natural body heat and a lubricant dispenser to mimic the way a woman’s vagina will lubricate itself during sex. While the Real Touch device can be somewhat difficult to clean as it cannot be submerged in water or placed in your dishwasher, many men will enjoy the ability to masturbate completely hands free. This is an excellent teledildonic sex toy for long distance relationships, but it can also be used by any man who wants a revolutionary masturbatory experience.

Q&A: Orgasms, Sex Outside Of Marriage and Islam

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 14:00:01 +0000

Many people have different religious and moral beliefs about sex, orgasms and sex outside of marriage. While some people don’t have any specific beliefs about sex at all, others have very strict beliefs about these topics. What can you do if you’re sexually frustrated but your beliefs don’t allow you to have sex outside of marriage?

Question: I have just found you on YouTube. Don’t you think some of your videos are against Islam? In Islam you cannot have sex without marriage. My question is what should somebody do if he cannot marry but is under pressure of orgasm and any relationship out of marriage is against his religious beliefs? Please consider Islamic limits more on your answers.

–YouTube Viewer

Respecting Religious And Moral Beliefs

Since everyone has different religious and moral beliefs about sex, it’s impossible for everyone to agree on what is right and what isn’t. Right and wrong are subjective, and can be different for everyone based on their religion and morals. If you want others to respect your own religious or moral beliefs, then it is important that you do the same for them. Don’t criticize other people’s beliefs or religion and if you can’t agree, just agree to disagree. It never hurts to listen though and you can simply take away whatever works for you and leave behind what doesn’t.

Sexual Frustration

For people whose religious and moral beliefs dictate that they stay away from sex or sex before marriage, it can be difficult to have your sexual needs met. People with strict beliefs about abstinence are easily sexually frustrated and may not know where to turn. Masturbation, however, is an easy and simple way to experience orgasm and sexual relief without having sex with another person before marriage. This may satisfy both your sexual needs and your religious doctrines without breaking any of your rules. However, some religions don’t allow masturbation or frown upon it, or don’t allow the use of pornography or other masturbation aids. Find out what your religion says about masturbation, because you may find that masturbation is something that isn’t restricted. Even if masturbation is restricted in some way based on your beliefs, you may want to weigh the alternative and decide which abides by your religion or moral beliefs best – masturbation or sex before marriage?

Are Your Beliefs Working For You?

Sometimes, you may find that your religious or moral beliefs aren’t working for you in your current lifestyle. If you’re sexually frustrated and have no way of achieving sexual relief under your beliefs, you may want to question your beliefs and whether they’re allowing you to live a full, happy and fulfulling lifestyle or whether they’re inhibiting you in some way. Everyone has the right to be true to themselves and live the way they want to, as long as it’s not harming anyone else in the process. If you find that you’re not able to be true to yourself with your religion or morals, do some soul searching to find out what is really right for you.

Q&A: What To Do When Masturbation Gets Boring

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 30 Mar 2010 14:00:36 +0000

While masturbation is a great way to satisfy your desire for sexual pleasure whether you’re a man or a woman, sometimes it can get boring if you’re doing it the same way every time. Here’s what you can do if you want to spice up masturbation and make it more pleasurable, whether you’re single or are waiting to have sex until you’re married.

Question: My problem is with masturbation and I like to do so every so often but it’s gotten boring to me. What would you suggest I do to spice it up? Twist? Bend? Masturbate harder? I need help so that I can stay a virgin until I marry my girlfriend!

–YouTube Viewer

Focusing On Different Fantasies

Having mental involvement with masturbation is one of the best ways to make masturbation better and more pleasurable. Try thinking about different fantasies while masturbating, or even try adding some visual stimulation like pornography or erotic novels if they work with your fantasies. Think of different things that really turn you on and incorporate them during masturbation. You may not be changing your physical masturbation techniques at all, but you’ll notice a big difference in the pleasure factor if you’re fantasizing about something that really gets you hot. There are a thousands and thousands of different magazines, videos and books out there, so there is definitely something for everyone no matter what your favorite flavor is.

Masturbation Toys

There are hundreds of masturbation toys available for both men and women. Women can experiment with different types of vibrators and dildos, experimenting with different sizes, shapes and textures to mix things up during masturbation. For different masturbation sensations, men can try a variety of male masturbation toys. Soft silicone masturbation sleeves with different textures can give you lots of different feelings during masturbation and make masturbation even more satisfying. Try going online and taking a look at the variety of male masturbation toys that you can buy, and look at ones that have different shapes and textures like studded or ribbed. You can even get a masturbation sleeve that was molded from an adult movie star’s genitals to go with your favorite movie if that turns you on. There are lots of ways to incorporate toys into masturbation, you just have to be a little creative and see what’s out there!

Are You Reaching Orgasm With Masturbation?

Most men do reach orgasm during masturbation, but many women do not, leaving them unsatisfied and always wanting more. If masturbation is getting boring for you or doesn’t seem to be satisfying you sexually, make sure you’re actually reaching the finish line. If you masturbate without actually reaching orgasm, you won’t get the sexual satisfaction your body needs and will pretty much be in a perpetual state of sexual desire. Make sure you’re having an orgasm at the end of each masturbation session. If you do reach orgasm after masturbating and still don’t feel satisfied afterwards, your body may actually be desiring multiple orgasms. Don’t short yourself! Give yourself plenty of time to masturbate without being interrupted so that you have the freedom to have as many orgasms as you need while masturbating to feel satisfied afterwards.

Q&A: Are There Side Effects To Masturbation – Good Or Bad?

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 29 Mar 2010 14:00:35 +0000

Masturbation is an absolutely normal, healthy part of your sex life whether you’re a guy or a girl. But pretty much everything has side effects, right? Does masturbation have any potential side effects, both good and bad? What can you expect from masturbation and what is the best way to handle it?

Question: Are there any side effects to masturbation? Is it true that if you masturbate on a daily basis, when you have sex with your girlfriend you won’t be as aroused or you won’t crave the sex as much? Can it affect penis size or growth?

–YouTube Viewer

Penis Size And Growth

Masturbation – even frequent masturbation – won’t affect your penis size or penis growth. Masturbation won’t affect puberty at all, so you don’t have to worry about masturbation stunting your growth or causing weight gain. If you masturbate often without proper lubricant, you might end up a little raw or sore, but there are no growth side effects from masturbation at all. Masturbation definitely won’t give you hairy palms or make you go blind either. Masturbation, if not in excess, is normal and healthy for both men and women.

Using Masturbation To Decrease Need For Sex

Many men, both teenagers and adults, have a very prominent sex drive. They enjoy sex and want it often. If they are sexually active, they’re usually very excited and it can cause a man to climax very quickly or even prematurely before sex. Masturbation can be used to “calm” a man down before sex, allowing him to slow down and enjoy it more. His body won’t be in such an extreme state of desire that he is completely focused on sex. Men who have very active sex drives may find that masturbation helps them to lead a more normal, satisfying life. Other men, however, may have the opposite effect from masturbation. They may find that masturbation satisfies their need for sexual pleasure so thoroughly that they aren’t able to climax or even become erect when having sex with their partners. Experiment with masturbation before sex and see how it affects you. You may find that you don’t need to masturbate at all if you’re with someone with whom you have sex with regularly, or you may find that you need to masturbate often in addition to having sex to truly satisfy your needs and make your sex life more enjoyable.

Are You Addicted To Masturbation?

Masturbation – just like sex, drugs, cigarettes, food and alcohol – can be addicting. If you find yourself masturbating very often, daily or even more than once a day, you may be addicted to masturbation. Ask yourself a few questions. Do you find that you’re masturbating out of habit, without even thinking about it? Do you find that masturbating is interfering with your life? Are you turning down dates or going home after school or work instead of hanging out with your friends so you can masturbate? Masturbation can be addicting and it is possible to break the addiction and have good, healthy masturbation instead. Consider talking to a sex therapist or a counselor if you find that you may be addicted to masturbation.

Q&A: I Feel No Relief When Masturbating – Am I Doing It Wrong?

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 22 Mar 2010 14:00:03 +0000

Masturbation for women is a little different and much more involved than it is for a guy. Women, however, require a bit more mental, emotional and physical stimulation to reach orgasm, especially if they’re newer to masturbation. Here’s what you can do if masturbation isn’t satisfying your sexual needs.

Question: Hey Jenn, I’m going to ask you, since you’re a girl. When I do “that” by myself, a lot of times it’s not that great and leaves me still horny as hell! Am I doing something wrong?

–Facebook Fan

Relaxing Before Masturbation

Women can’t have an orgasm when they’re stressed or thinking about work or the kids. This is one of the biggest problems that women have with masturbation. It’s so difficult to calm their mind down and get it off the “to do” list and in the mood that they either don’t masturbate at all or have trouble doing it and reaching orgasm. If you want to have a great masturbation session and feel satisfied afterwards, it’s essential that you relax before masturbating. Draw a bath, have a glass of wine if you’re of age, or do something else that you find relaxing and refreshing. Read a steamy romance novel or even an erotic novel to get your mind off of everyday stresses and start thinking about pleasure.

Start With Your Clitoris

If you’re new to masturbation, the easiest way to masturbate is to head straight for your clitoris. You don’t have to insert a dildo or other toy into your vagina to acheive orgasm. Once you get the hang of things, you may want to add g-spot stimulation to your masturbation but until then, you’ll have the most success by simply focusing on your clitoris. Use lots of lube to prevent discomfort, and use a vibrator if you like. Just explore the area until you find out what feels good – and then keep doing it. Don’t focus on going harder or faster, unless that’s what you like. If you want, go slow. Just remember to stay relaxed and keep your mind from wandering off into stressful territory. Another issue that women have when masturbating is not allowing themselves enough time to explore themselves. Instead, they focus on having a “quickie” instead of relaxing and letting the pleasure take over. Many times when women are so focused on the end result, they can’t get there at all.

Let Go When The Orgasm Comes

A lot of women have trouble letting go when orgasm approaches. When you’re about to have an orgasm, your muscles will tighten up and your breath will catch in your throat. Sometimes at this stage, women simply freak out, tense up and stop breathing and as a result, their bodies start to come down from the brink of orgasm instead of jump off the edge. When your body reaches the point of orgasm, it’s important to remember to breathe deeply and relax your muscles. Don’t focus so much on the orgasm itself, relax and just focus on the pleasure. Continue to do what feels good and the orgasm will come – no pun intended. You might even get multiple orgasms!

Q&A: Can Ejaculation Cause Blindness?

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 21 Mar 2010 14:00:46 +0000

Many stories have been told about sex, masturbation and ejaculation to try to scare people into not having sex or not masturbating. Several years ago, masturbation was believed to be wrong for a man (and enjoying sexual pleasure was believed to be wrong for women) and that ejaculation would cause blindness. Can it?

Question: Can ejaculation cause blindness? This is something that I heard from various sources (people I know and people I talked to on the Internet) but I don’t know if there has actually been proven cases about this. Is it true or is this something that people made up?

–YouTube Viewer

Ejaculation Does Not Cause Blindness

Ejaculation – during sex or masturbation - never has and never will cause a man to go blind. This is what is known as a sex myth, and there are many of them. Other sex myths about masturbation and ejaculation are that it will cause a man to grow hairy palms. Going blind or growing hair on your palms is not something that will happen from simply ejaculating during sex or masturbation. There are no special or “rare” cases of this happening - it won’t happen, ever. It never did. If these sex myths were true, just about every guy in the world would be blind or have hair on his palms.

Where These Myths Come From

Generally, sex myths like this come from the last hundred years or so, when many religious and philisophical organizations decided it was bad or morally wrong to masturbate and shouldn’t be done. Rumors were spread that bad things would happen if you masturbated or ejaculated, such as going blind or growing hair on your palms. People who went blind were often looked down upon, almost as though they were proof that this affliction existed. Young boys and men were afraid to masturbate or ejaculate, because they were afraid horrible things would happen to them. Rumors and sex myths such as these were a form of control, a way for religious and philisophical organizations to force people to do what they believed was right.

What To Do When Someone Tells You A Sex Myth

If someone you know, or someone on the Internet tells you something you know is false, just dismiss it. Although the vast majority of civilization has realized that masturbation and ejaculation won’t in fact cause blindness or hair to grow on the palms, some people are still suggesting this is true to try to continue to force people to adhere to their own belief system. There is absolutely nothing wrong with masturbation and ejaculation – in fact, it’s a normal and healthy way to discover and enjoy your sexuality. A man’s body was designed to ejaculate, as a form of sexual release and to help make babies. Sometimes, if a man does not ejaculate after sexual tension has built up, this can cause some discomfort or pain. Masturbation is an excellent way to relieve sexual tension without the consequences that sex can bring, such as sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy.

Q&A: Ladies – Masturbation And Your Period

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 14:00:09 +0000

When teenagers and women begin masturbating, with it comes lots of questions. If you’ve begun having your monthly cycle or have been having your cycle and it suddenly stops in conjunction with regular masturbation, you may be wondering if masturbation is to blame for the disappearance of your period. Is this something that can happen, or is something else going on? Here’s what you want to know about masturbation and your period.

Question: If you masturbate, does it stop you from getting your period? If so, for how long?

–YouTube Viewer

Masturbating During Your Period

There is nothing wrong with masturbating during your period. It may be a little messy depending on how you like to masturbate, but many women enjoy masturbating during their monthly cycle and simply do so in the bath or shower. Masturbating during your period is also not harmful to your body at all and the stimulation can actually help loosen some of the tissue that is being shed so your body doesn’t have to work so hard to expel it. Many women report that having orgasms during their period help to lessen the pain of menstural cramps. Choosing to masturbate or abstaining from masturbationg during your period is simply a matter of preference.

Can Masturbation Stop Your Period

If your period has suddenly stopped, you may be wondering what is going on. If you masturbate regularly or have recently masturbated, it may seem logical to link masturbation to the change in your menstrual flow. Generally, the period doesn’t stop during or right after masturbation. In fact, masturbation often increases the flow of a woman’s period. But if you’re expecting your period and it doesn’t come, you might think that masturbation is to blame. You may also feel that masturbation could be to blame if your periods become irregular, or they suddenly become lighter or heavier than usual. The truth is that masturbation can’t stop your period – regardless of what you do or how you do it. It also can’t make your menstrual flow become irregular or give you a lighter menstrual flow.

Seeing Your Doctor

If you’ve stopped your period, or you’ve had a noticeable change in your menstruation, you need to think about some of the things that could possibly be the culprit here because it’s not masturbation. One of the biggest things that causes a monthly cycle to cease is pregnancy. Pregnancy can sometimes cause a cycle to become irregular, or simply just lighter than usual, although this is rare. Other things that could affect the flow of your period are hormonal changes and eating disorders such as anorexia. It is important to see your doctor if you’ve experienced a significant change in your menstrual flow, including a menstrual flow that suddenly becomes irregular or stops completely. There may be an underlying cause that you don’t yet know about that needs to be taken care of. There is no way to know what has caused the change in your monthly cycle unless you discuss the changes with your doctor.

Q&A: Is It Normal To Masturbate?

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 11 Feb 2010 14:00:02 +0000

Questions about masturbation, especially for boys that are just beginning to go through puberty, are common. Is masturbation normal? Is masturbation wrong, or can it cause blindness or hairy palms? What is the liquid that comes out of the penis at the end of masturbation? Here’s what you want to know about masturbation, and more.

Question: Is it normal for a 14 year old boy to masturbate, and at the end of masturbation a transparent liquid comes out? What is it? Is it sperm?

–YouTube Viewer

The Safest Safe Sex There Is

Masturbation, for both men and women, is perfectly normal and actually a healthy part of going through puberty and a component of a healthy sex life when you get older. Not long ago, boys were taught to believe that masturbation was wrong and that it would be harmful to them if they did masturbate. Some old wives’ tales suggested that boys could grow hair on their palms or even go blind if they masturbated, and everyone would know they had been masturbating. They were taught that masturbation was something that was shameful. Masturbation, however, is actually the safest sex there is. Masturbating is safer than having sex with a condom and even safer than having sex with a condom and with a partner who is taking birth control. You can’t get pregnant from masturbation and you can’t contract any sexually transmitted diseases. It’s the best way to pleasure yourself without worrying about the consequences of sex with someone else.

Masturbation And Ejaculation

When a man masturbates and reaches climax, a fluid comes out of the end of the penis called semen. Semen is a fluid that contains millions of sperm and when it comes into contact with a woman’s vagina, can get her pregnant. Semen can range in color and consistency based on your age, your health and your diet. A younger boy may have clear, thin semen, while an older man may have thicker, more white colored semen. A poor diet filled with fatty foods can change the color and texture of your semen, while a diet full of fiber, fruits and vegetables will keep your semen and sperm healthy. Proper exercise can also help keep your semen healthy – if you suspect there’s something up with the color or texture of your semen, make an appointment to see your medical doctor.

Considerations To Take Before Masturbating

While masturbation is extremely safe, there are some considerations you want to take before masturbating just to make sure everything goes smoothly. Wash your hands before and after masturbating to keep things clean, and use a good, water or silicone based lubricant for the least amount of friction. Find a quiet place to masturbate alone where you won’t be disturbed, and lock the door if you need to. Bring in a magazine or a book that arouses you. Many sex toys for men are available to aid with masturbation and can increase pleasure and the power of climax. Male masturbators, including masturbation sleeves, can be used in conjunction with lube to make masturbation even better. Masturbation is healthy for both men and women, and can be a great way to relieve sexual frustration, especially during puberty.

5 Sex Tips For Good Health

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 10 Feb 2010 21:00:06 +0000

Sexuality for women is still a taboo topic. Not long ago, women were raised to feel as though sex was dirty, and deriving pleasure from sex was impossible. Fortunately, women can and do enjoy sex, but they have so much more potential to do so once they become more comfortable with themselves as sexual beings. In our new book, The Best Sex Of Your Life, presented by SheKnows.com, we show you 101 ways to make your sex life hotter and learn to enjoy it more. Here are 5 great ways to improve your sexual health right now!

Happy, Healthy Women Have The Hottest Sex (#101)

Women are notorious for taking care of others before they take care of themselves. For better sexual health though, a woman must make sure she is taken care of too! Make sure you get enough sleep, because fatigue will make you less likely to want sex – you’ll want the bed for a much different reason. Get your nails done, get a pedicure and enjoy a quiet spa lunch. Eat healthy and exercise.

Learn To Touch Yourself And Then Teach Your Man Your Moves (#14)

Your man can’t read your mind. He doesn’t know what you like – but you do. That is, if you masturbate. If you don’t, get started! If you learn how to pleasure yourself, you’ll better be able to show your partner how you like to be touched.

Sex Toys Can Strengthen Your Orgasm (#67)

If you want to strengthen your orgasm or experience a different type of orgasm entirely, now is not the time to be shy about sex toys! Try a few out – you might be surprised! Sex toys allow you to have stronger, faster orgasms and can be just the ticket if you have a difficult time acheiving orgasm at all. In fact, women can experience many different types of orgasms, each with their own powerful and unique sensations. Trying different sex toys can help you expand your orgasms!

Don’t Forget To Have Fun (#87)

During the beginning of a relationship, everything is new and absolutely fascinating. You’re not sure what is going to happen next – and neither is he! That makes sex, as well as everything else about the relationship, explosive. When you and your partner begin to get comfortable with each other, the passion tends to dissolve. Remember how you and your partner were at the beginning of your relationship and allow yourself to have that kind of spontaneous fun again. Chances are, the sex is going to be just as good!

Having More Sex Boosts Your Libido (#2)

Sex is one of the most powerful ways to improve your mood and reduce stress. It feels great – physically and emotionally. During and after sex, especially if you reach climax one or more times, allows your brain to release certain chemicals that make you feel fabulous. Having more sex that helps release those chemicals will in turn make you want sex more. It’s a feel good cycle!

Don’t forget, get your copy of our book, The Best Sex of Your Life: 101 Secrets Every Woman Should Know, on Amazon.com today!

Q&A: Sex And The Long Distance Relationship

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 06 Feb 2010 14:00:04 +0000

Long distance relationships are difficult, but having a long distance relationship with someone you’ve been physically intimate with before makes it even harder. Not having that physical relationship and intimacy can make you feel terribly lonely, and can even be something that contributes to the dissolution of the relationship. How can you stay in touch with your partner sexually, even if they’re miles and miles away?

Question: I am far away from my family and girlfriend, how can I easily get the taste of sex?

–Facebook Question

Masturbation

Masturbation is probably the easiest way to satisfy your sexual desires while you’re in a long distance relationship. You and your partner can both masturbate while thinking of each other, and with today’s technology, it’s not hard to feel like you’re in the same room with them! Use a webcam and even audio chat for the most realistic experience. Trade sexy, naughty photos with your partner via email or even on your cell phone. Text dirty things to each other, and make tangible plans to see each other soon to help keep the spark alive. Many couples in long distance relationships also have old-fashioned phone sex!

Sex With Another Partner

Your girlfriend may or may not be into it, but another way to satisfy your need for sexual intimacy is to have sex with someone else while you’re away. For this to work, however, you and your partner must be in a totally confident and non-jealous relationship with each other. This almost never works out, but it certainly is possible if you and your partner are both okay with having an open relationship while you are far away. If this is something you and your partner agree on, always make sure to communicate with each other and be open and honest. Also, make sure that you and your partner end the “open relationship” as soon as you’re back together.

Abstinence

Your third choice when it comes to sex and a long distance relationship is to simply abstain from sex and wait until you’re back with your partner to experience physical intimacy. This may sound extremely difficult, but actually, people in long distance relationships do this all the time. The vast majority of partners do prefer to masturbate and use technology to keep the sexual intimacy alive, but some partners simply choose to wait. Sometimes waiting, however, can end in an affair, so make sure that this is something you and your partner are okay with doing and see it as something you and your partner can accomplish. If you’re not sure about your ability to stay abstinent for a long period of time, try masturbation and stay in touch with your partner.

Long distance relationships will never be easy, even with text, phones, webcams and audio chats. For a long distance relationship to work, you and your partner must be committed to each other – and committed to keeping the long distance part of the relationship as short as possible. There has to be an end in sight. Relationships that will be long distance indefinitely or until further notice generally don’t end well. If you are committed to your partner and vice versa, you will both do what is necessary to make finite plans to be together – physically – at some point.

Q&A: What’s The Best Way To Masturbate If You’re A Guy?

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 31 Jan 2010 14:00:36 +0000

What is the best way to masturbate if you’re a guy? Is there a wrong way to masturbate? You asked, you want to know! Here are some great masturbation tips for guys, but feel free to get creative and make up your own ideas.

Question: I’m curious, what’s the best way to masturbate? (I’m a guy)

–YouTube Viewer

There Is No Wrong Way To Masturbate

No, there really isn’t a wrong way to masturbate as long as what you’re doing feels good. Very frequent masturbation can cause raw skin, but this usually isn’t too harmful and will go away in a few days when your penis is given a break from all the friction caused by masturbating. In very, very rare cases, frequent and rough masturbation can break the muscle fibers within the penis causing it to become crooked (we’re talking a lot of rough masturbation here). Normal and even daily masturbation won’t hurt you, as long as you’re pleasuring yourself and not causing any kind of pain. If your style of masturbation falls under those categories, have fun and don’t be afraid to be creative and find new ways of giving yourself pleasure! Regular masturbation is a healthy and fun part of every man’s sex life.

Hygeine And Comfort

The important thing when it comes to masturbation is to practice proper hygeine. Wash your hands before and after masturbation and if you use a lot of lubricant or lotion, wash your penis after masturbation as well. Make sure to clean up your ejaculate afterwards too.

The best way to stay comfortable during masturbation is to use lots and lots of lube! A great, water based lubricant always works better than lotion and it lasts longer too. Find a private place to masturbate where you’re comfortable and can look at your favorite magazine or video for extra arousal. Make sure you’re not going to be disturbed in the process, so you can focus totally on yourself and your pleasure without worrying about someone coming in or getting caught. Lock the door!

Sex Toys For Boys

There are some great sex toys for boys out there that can be used during masturbation that can enhance the sensations and make masturbation even more pleasurable. Masturbation sleeves are excellent, because they’re soft, squishy and many of them even have great little suction cups. Penis pumps and penis rings are also great to use during masturbation as well. Anal plugs and anal beads also work well for masturbation if you enjoy anal play or prostate stimulation. Sex toys for boys work a lot better than homemade male masturbation toys, such as toilet paper rolls and fruits or pies! They feel better too! Of course, make sure to use lube with your toys - they work best when you use lots and lots of it! Just make sure to use proper hygeine after using a sex toy and wash it with special sex toy cleaner or hot, soapy water and dry it before you put it up. Believe it or not, investing in a good sex toy for masturbation can be a lot more satisfying than just using your favorite hand!

Q&A: Can Masturbation Cause Weight Gain Or Stunted Growth?

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 13 Jan 2010 14:00:12 +0000

Masturbation myths are everywhere. Does masturbation cause blindness, weight gain or stunted growth? Will too much masturbation make your palms grow hairy or make your penis get bigger? Hearing all of these masturbation tall tales can definitely cause some confustion about masturbation in general, especially for boys just beginning to discover masturbation and their own sexuality. What is the truth when it comes to masturbation and myths?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Myth or fact – can masturbation cause weight gain or stunted growth?

–YouTube Viewer

Is Masturbation Harmful?

In one word: No. Masturbation can actually be healthy for boys going through puberty as well as adult men. Almost every man masturbates, and most boys do too when they going through puberty. Masturbation relieves sexual frustration and can help you relax and improve your mood. Masturbation can be harmful if done too much, and in this case, “too much” is not subjective at all. If your penis becomes raw or begins to hurt, you’ll know you’re masturbating too much. Other than masturbation abuse, it is not harmful at all. It won’t cause blindness or make your palms go hairy, or even cause weight gain or stunt your growth. These are all myths that are associated with masturbation that simply don’t have any truth to them. .

Where Did The Masturbation Myths Come From?

Masturbation is often considered taboo, although less so now than it used to be. Several years ago, especially in religious societies, masturbation was considered “bad” or even “evil.” Masturbation was considered an abomination in some societies and in others, it was simply something men “didn’t do.” As a result, mothers wanted to keep their sons from learning that masturbation could be pleasurable and created myths that masturbation would cause all kinds of horrible things to happen to any boy that masturbated. Boys and men lived in fear that if they did masturbate, something bad would happen to them as a result. In addition to the fear of physical consequences of masturbation, with such noticeable conditions as sudden blindness or hairy palms, the entire town would know what they had been up to behind closed doors and they would then face social rejection as well. The only thing that masturbation myths are rooted in is fear.

Should I Talk To My Doctor About Masturbation?

Doctors know that pretty much every guy masturbates, so if you’re a healthy guy, you don’t need to talk to your doctor about your masturbation habits. You DO need to talk to your doctor if you find that you’re masturbating too much, or it is painful or your penis is becoming raw. These things are not symptoms you experience from normal, healthy masturbation. Also, if you are experiencing unexplained weight gain or growth issues, those ARE things you need to talk to your doctor about because they’re not from masturbation – they could be a symptom of another medical condition.

All in all, masturbation is a healthy, natural part of every man’s life. It is natural for people to want to satisfy themselves sexually when they’re first learning about masturbation and their sexuality, as well as later in life as a part of a healthy and happy sex life.

Male Sex Toys: Masturbators, Penis Pumps, and More

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 15:33:18 +0000

Male masturbators don’t get enough P.R. Everyone’s heard of vibrators, dildos, etc. for women. But there are actually some really great sex toys out there for guys to enjoy on their own or with a partner.

We recently did a video on the 5 most popular sex toys and one in particular created lots of emails and questions – the “pink squishy”, a.k.a. the Super Head Honcho which is a male masturbator. So, we decided to do another video focused purely on the different types of male masturbators. Here are 5 of our favorites…

What Is A Male Masturbator?

Male masturbators are simply a soft silicone sleeve that a man can slip over his penis (with lube) to provide extra sensations while masturbating. Some men try to masturbate with their own self-made masturbators and homemade sex toys, and you’d be surprised at what kind of stuff around the house they use! Banana peels, toilet paper or paper towel rolls, pantyhose…the list goes on. If you masturbate at all, buying an inexpensive male masturbator is absolutely worth it. Home masturbators tend to be difficult to use and a definite waste of time. On to the top 5 male masturbators!

The Tube Stroker

The Tube Stroker is your most basic male sex toy. It’s a simple, clear silicone sleeve with a hole in the middle for…well, you know. It’s fairly discreet – someone that looks at it without knowing what it is may not be able to guess what it’s used for. The Tube Stroker, however, has absolutely no grips on it whatsoever, so you may want to use something in between the stroker and your hand to provide you with some traction.

The Super Head Honcho

Also known as the “pink squishy,” the Super Head Honcho is one of the more popular male masturbators. It’s easy to use, and has good outer grips to make masturbation with the squishy easier. The Super Head Honcho also has inner suction cups to provide you with extra stimulation during masturbation, allowing you to have a faster and more powerful orgasm. The Super Head Honcho is one of the easiest male masturbators to clean – because you do want to clean your masturbators after you use them – because it flips completely inside out so you can wash every inch of it.

Eve’s Ruby Delight

Eve’s Ruby Delight is another popular male masturbator, with a flamboyantly reddish pink color and a textured entry for extra sensations at the base of your penis. The best thing about this particular male masturbator is that it has “action grips.” Intense grips allow you to really hold on while you’re masturbating, and it definitely won’t slip away from you. The Ruby Delight also tends to be shorter than other male masturbation sex toys, so if you’re very well endowed, you might find that it’s a little small for you.

Katie Morgan Cyberskin

For those who really want that “realistic vagina feel” with a male masturbator, the Katie Morgan Cyberskin is molded directly from, well, Katie Morgan. An incredibly realistic vagina (we suppose this is the part that looks exactly like Katie Morgan) adorns the entry point, and the inside is made of soft, sensual silicone. This larger male masturbator is great for the more well endowed men, but will work for almost any size penis. Unfortunately, it’s incredibly heavy and may make your arms and wrists tired during masturbation. If you don’t mind the weight though, and are really turned on by a more realistic masturbator, the Katie Morgan Cyberskin might just be right up your alley.

Super Cyber Snatch Pump

This combinaton penis pump and masturbator sleeve gives you multiple sensations during masturbation whether you’re going solo or are with your partner. The pump function works to give you an incredible “suction” feeling, while the masturbation sleeve provides smooth and sensual friction. The Super Cyber Snatch Pump doesn’t have a good grip on it though, so you may find it slipping out of your grip when you’re all lubed up. This sex toy is also great for larger men – it’s a whopping 9 inches long! Be careful with this one though, because too much pressure and suction on your penis can cause blood vessels to break and can be very painful. If it hurts at all, stop!

Choosing a great male masturbator isn’t hard, or expensive and it’s way better than going the “do it yourself” route. Try a few of them by yourself or with your partner to find out which one you like best! Just don’t forget the lube!

What Causes Irrational Fear Of Sex?

Paul Carlson — Wed, 07 Oct 2009 14:00:49 +0000

Sex is everywhere. Sex sells, right? You see sex on television, in movies and you hear it in music. It’s on billboards, in newspaper ads and all over the Internet. So logically, as a society, we don’t seem very afraid of sex, do we? Surprisingly enough, many people still have a deep seated, irrational fear of sex, masturbation and other sex related things. Why is this fear irrational, and what causes it? What can you do about it?

Sex And Psychology

The most complicated part of human psychology is sex. Sex involves so many things, including the body, the mind and even your emotions. What feels good physically doesn’t always feel good emotionally, and what feels good emotionally doesn’t always please you physically. It can be difficult to understand why someone may have a fear about sex or have a sex related phobia, because there are so many contributing factors to sex. In persons who haven’t been sexually abused, a fear of sex or a sex phobia can seem irrational. The human body and mind was created to enjoy and take pleasure from sex, and it’s one of the most natural things for two human beings to do together. What are some things that can cause an irrational fear of sex?

Painful Sex

Many people can experience pain during sex or masturbation. In women, small vaginas or lack of natural lubrication can make penetration extremely uncomfortable or painful. In some women, the clitoral hood doesn’t cover the clitoris completely, making most types of sexual contact painful instead of pleasurable. In men, a poorly done circumcision can leave too little skin on the penis, making an erection uncomfortable or painful when the skin stretches too taut. Penises also have stiff, fibrous muscles that when erect, can “break.” It’s rare, but rough masturbation or sex can “break” a penis, making sex or even erections painful if it’s not corrected immediately. Anyone that experiences pain during sex or masturbation can develop a fear of sex or sex related activities, depending on what causes them pain or discomfort.

Psychological Issues

Many people have an irrational fear of sex due to psychological factors. Some people have phobias of sex or masturbation because their parents brought them up in an overly religious environment, or they were taught to think sex is dirty. Believe it or not, many women are taught that enjoying sex is “wrong” and that sex is only something they must do as a wife when they get married. Many of these women don’t have orgasms and have very poor and unsatisfying sex lives, therefore, may avoid sex as much as they can in fear of it. Many men and women are brought up thinking that masturbation is wrong as well, even that it will give you hairy palms or cause blindness. Any type of skewed thinking about sexual pleasure that was ingrained on a person as a child can contribute to sexual fears and phobias in adulthood.

STD’s And Pregnancy

Some people avoid sex all together because they have deeply rooted fears of pregnancy or sexually transmitted diseases. Perhaps someone in the family contracted AIDS or got pregnant, and the family criticized them or looked down upon them. Perhaps someone contracted a sexually transmitted disease or got pregnant and is terrified of it happening again. Fears of pregnancy and STD’s can play a large part in someone’s irrational phobias of sex.

What To Do

If you have a fear of sex or sex related activities, it’s important to see a doctor. What you’re experiencing, however, can determine which type of doctor you go see. If you’re having physical pain during sex, you should make an appointment with your general practitioner or family doctor. They can do a physical examination as well as take a detailed medical history to determine what exactly is causing the pain or contributing to it. If you’re having psychological issues with sex, consider seeing a therapist or a specialized sex therapist to help talk to you about your phobias, why you have them and how you can work your way through them.

Many people are afraid of seeing the doctor – regardless of which type – because having a sexual fear for whatever reason can seem embarrassing. Lots of things are embarrassing though, and you deserve to have a happy, healthy sex life. Find a doctor or therapist that you’re comfortable with, and take control of your sex life.

Do You Know The 5 Most Popular Sex Toys?

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 19:20:28 +0000

You’ve read about what we think are some of the greatest sex toys, lubes and condoms that are available on the market today, but we want to know what you think are the best sex toys around!

Dan and I were sitting around talking the other day and wondering “what are the most popular sex toys?” Sure, we have our own personal favorites, but what does everyone else like? So we sent an email to our friends at Adam & Eve and they sent us their 5 best selling sex toys so that we could see for ourselves (and share them with you). Watch this video for the results – I guarantee that a few of them will surprise you!

5. Super Head Honcho Masturbator

The Super Head Honcho Masturbator is actually a male sex toy (sex toy for boys) – it’s a soft, pink, silicone sleeve that slips over the penis to provide super sensations for a man while he’s masturbating. Don’t worry – it can also be used with a partner too! The Super Head Honcho Masturbator has several suction chambers for a truly realistic feeling, and turns inside out for easy cleanup with soap and water.

4. G-Gasm Delight G-Spot Vibrator

The G-Gasm Delight G-Spot Vibrator is a slim, easy to use vibrator that is designed specifically for g-spot stimulation. You can also use it for clitoral stimulation, because the vibrating “egg” at the top of the wand works well for both types of pleasure. The G-Gasm Delight G-Spot Vibrator can be used by even the most novice sex toy users, including your partner on his search for the elusive g-spot.

3. Eve’s Slim Pink Pleaser Vibrator

The Slim Pink Pleaser Vibrator is the perfect introductory vibrator for inexperienced users, and is also good for discreet travel or a simple, go-to vibrator that does the job. It’s just the right size for novice users and provides great vaginal and clitoral stimulation while still being easy to hold and soft but naughtily textured.

2. Adam And Eve’s Clitoral Kisser

The Clitoral Kisser might look a little strange at first, but the perfect clitoral suction it provides makes it an easy to use and devilishly pleasurable sex toy. Great for both individual masturbation and use with a partner, the soft silicone tip gently cups and kisses your clitoris, providing waves of pleasure.

1. Rotating G-Spot Rabbit Vibrator

Coming in at the number one most popular sex toy is the Rotating G-Spot Rabbit Vibrator. This vibrator is available at a great price for people who have never used a rabbit vibrator before, but is also made with several features to please even the most discerning vibrator user. The Rotating G-Spot Rabbit Vibrator has moving pearls, a rotating shaft, a perfectly angled g-spot tip for intense g-spot pleasure, and adorable rabbit ears for naughty clitoral stimulation. This very well may be the most popular sex toy on the market today for women who want to experience multiple types of pleasure at the same time. Don’t limit yourself to simply using it by yourself – use it with your partner to show him how you like to be pleasured!

There are dozens and even hundreds of different types of sex toys available, whether you’re a novice or experienced sex toy user. Try a few of the toys for yourself and find out what your favorite is!

Does Masturbation Reduce Fertility In Men?

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 14:00:04 +0000

There are many myths when it comes to male (and even female) masturbation. Some old wives tales continue to circulate, such as the myth that men get hairy palms or go blind if they masturbate. Fortunately, most of us have been able to sort out the truth from the lies, but some questions aren’t so bogus – what about masturbation, fertility and erections? What are the facts?

Many men want to know – does masturbation reduce fertility in men? Does it affect their ability to have an erection? Watch this video for the answer…

The Straight Facts

Masturbation does not reduce fertility in men. This is a common misconception, but a generally a man’s testicles are able to reproduce sperm at a high rate. Frequent masturbation, such as daily masturbation or masturbation more than once a day, may temporarily reduce sperm count, but won’t affect fertility in the long term. Masturbation, especially during the teen years, won’t affect a man’s fertility at all in his life, although there are other factors (such as which type of underwear are worn) may affect fertility temporarily. Other things that can affect sperm count are exercise and medications. If you’re concerned about your fertility, see a doctor to discuss your lifestyle and daily habits to find out which ones are most conducive to being fertile.

Masturbation And Erectile Dysfunction

Masturbation also does not affect a man’s ability to get an erection, now or later in life. In fact, masturbation can help with sexual relief and can sometimes help with impotency (practicing getting an erection and finding out what is arousing), and even frequent masturbation won’t cause or speed up erectile dysfunction in later years. Erectile dysfunction can be caused by age, medication and some other factors. The best thing to do if you’re worried about erectile dysfunction or think you may have problems getting an erection is see your doctor. Your doctor can investigate different reasons you might be having erectile problems. Don’t worry – any erectile dysfunction you’re experiencing now wasn’t caused by frequent masturbation when you were younger.

If You’re Trying To Have A Baby

That said, if you’re trying to have a baby with your partner, masturbating frequently, such as every day or multiple times during the day, probably isn’t the best idea. Many fertility doctors will tell a man to discontinue masturbating and have sex with his partner instead to try to get their partner pregnant, but this is simply to provide more opportunity for sperm to reach an egg. It has nothing to do with masturbation lowering sperm count and affecting a man’s ability to get his partner pregnant.

Normal Masturbation?

Of course, male (and female) masturbation is normal and a healthy part of any sex life. It’s important to find out what pleases you and can be a quick way to relieve sexual frustration and provide satisfaction, especially if you’re not sexually active with a partner. Some people, however, think that frequent masturbation is too much – but how much is too much? That really comes down to personal preference. As long as it doesn’t become an addiction that adversely impacts your life in other ways, “right” is a different number for each of us.

Sex Toys 101: How To Buy Your First Vibrator

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 12 Sep 2009 14:45:57 +0000

Many couples are discovering that vibrators and other sex toys can enhance their sex lives by adding a little fun and variety.

And with masturbation – especially female masturbation (yes, it does happen) – being somewhat taboo in society today, a woman interested in pleasuring herself may have few options. Many women choose to masturbate with vibrators or dildos, and share their sex toys with their partners. Where can you get vibrators or dildos?

But if it’s your first time, what do you start with? What is the right vibrator for you?

If you’ve been curious about vibrators, particularly about buying your first one, this is just the video for you. We’ll walk you through 5 simple steps for choosing the perfect vibrator for you. It’s easier than you’re thinking right now!

How You’re Going To Use Your Vibrator

The first step is to decide how you’re going to use a prospective sex toy. Do you want to use it by yourself? Do you want to use it with a partner, or both? Do you need a vibrator with tittillating action, or will a non-vibrating, standard dildo do for you? Do you want something just to massage your clitoris, or would you like to use it for insertion? Do you want a toy that does double – both massaging your clitoris and inserting and stimulating your g-spot at the same time? Deciding what the most important aspects of owning a vibrator are for you is a crucial first step in finding the right vibrator for you.

What Material Do You Want Your Sex Toy Made Out Of?

There are several different types of sex toy materials available on the market today – for example, one of the newer materials is called Cyberskin and is soft and squishy, with a very real skin-like sensation. This is a great material for a penis-shaped dildo, making it more realistic. You can also buy plastic, silicone or steel vibrators, or go with softer silicone or even glass dildos or vibrators. Check out a sex toy website that will allow you to browse different materials available so you can find out what type of material intrigues you the most.

What Size And Shape Should Your Sex Toy Be?

Size and shape are very important when it comes to finding the perfect sex toy or dildo for yourself. Vibrators and dildos come in a complete variety of shapes and sizes. Do you want something small and discreet that will fit in your handbag? Or would you like a very large, very wide dildo that will bring you to the brink of the kind of pleasure you can withstand? Do you want something medium sized that will get the job done? Think about what you’re most comfortable with sexually so you can find the right size for you – it’s not a one size fits all sort of deal.

Your Vibrator’s Power Source

If you’ve decided to go with a vibrator and not a standard, non-vibrating dildo, you can run into the issues of recharging your vibrator or switching batteries. Both are good ways to charge your vibrator but both have their disadvantages. Running out of batteries (and often not having any more on hand) in the heat of the moment can be a huge disappointment, while having a cordless, rechargable vibrator can be quite expensive. Think about how convenient you want your vibrator to be by determining how often you think you’re going to use it.

You Get What You Pay For

If this is your first time vibrator or dildo, you might not be prepared to spend a hundred dollars or more on the hottest, most realistic vibrator on the market today. But you certainly are going to get what you pay for. That doesn’t mean there isn’t middle ground. Look for a dildo or vibrator that is in your price range, but the cheaper you go, the less features and power your new vibrator is going to have. You don’t have to spend a fortune, but for a good vibrator or dildo, you’re going to spend more than five bucks.

Teens And Porn – What Are The Hidden Dangers?

Paul Carlson — Sat, 29 Aug 2009 19:25:30 +0000

Almost all teens watch porn, no matter how hard you try to hide it from them. A simple Google search for “boobs” can pull up a multitude of things, and the Internet makes it incredibly easy to access all kinds of porn. Teens spend more time on the Internet than just about anybody, so naturally they’re exposed. Should you worry about it? What are the hidden dangers of teens watching porn?

Lots of people watch porn, but are there any hidden dangers to watching porn? Especially for teens? Visit our YouTube site and leave a comment – tell us what you think about teens watching porn!

Pornography Changes Your Perceptions

While teens masturbating is completely normal, you may be curious as to whether watching porn is a concern for teens or not. While men, and young boys of course, are visual creatures and may need visual stimulation to complete the masturbation experience, is porn a good way for them to do so? Not necessarily, and not just for teenagers. Many types of pornography give only a brief view of what sex is like, and often caters towards certain fetishes for rough sex, voyeuristic sex and more. Porn is like a snapshot of what sex and relationships are really like, and the “snapshot” is usually blurred, poor quality or grainy. It’s definitely not a good representation of what the real thing is like.

Pornography can skew a person’s perception of what sex is really like and what the human body is really like. This is especially true for teens, who are just beginning to develop their perceptions, however, it is true for anyone. Porn is not an accurate representation of any of these things, and teenagers especially don’t know how to tell the difference between what is represented in pornography and what is true in real life.

The Perception Of The Human Body

The biggest perception that can be skewed by porn is what people are supposed to look like. Teenage boys in particular can grow up watching porn and begin to believe that all women are supposed to look like porn stars and there is something wrong with those who don’t. If you support your teen or even your grown husband or boyfriend using a visual aid to help with masturbation, look for pornography or magazines with more realistic representations of the female body.

Maturity Is A Factor

So should your teenager watch porn? The likely consensus is no – however, maturity plays a factor in whether your teen should have access to pornography or not. It also depends on your religious preferences. Of course, if your religion dictates that pornography is unacceptable in all forms, you should certainly do your best to keep pornography out of your home at all levels. However, if you have a mature teen and access to realistic images and videos, pornography may actually benefit your teen, or even your grown husband or boyfriend. In fact, realistic pornography may even benefit teen girls and grown women as well. Some theories suggest that teens with access to pornography and who are comfortable with masturbation may choose to wait longer to have sex. Ultimately, it’s up to you and your teen, or you and your partner as to whether you allow pornography into your lives and how to keep the dangers of it at a minimum.

Better Orgasm 101

Jessica Perez — Fri, 07 Aug 2009 13:00:24 +0000

As with most anything in life, there is a learning curve one must round before attaining the proficiency and skill to succeed. Sex is no different. Were we women born to immediately know how to achieve orgasm? I think not.

It may be easier for some women solely due to chemical makeup. But the majority of us – 70% according to statistics – require active clitoral stimulation before we can achieve orgasm. The good part is that we can learn a method that will allow us to increase our sexual responsiveness during intercourse and experience climax through the act of intercourse.

Consider yourself enrolled in Better Orgasm 101. We will learn the three steps in a plan to lead you in the right direction.

Clitoral Stimulation

In the first part of your new program, you or your partner will stimulate your clitoris as you are making love. During intercourse, if the motions are distracting to you and prevent you from reaching climax, simply have your partner insert his erect penis into your vagina without movement. During this still period of intercourse, manually stimulate your clitoris until you reach orgasm. Once this is successful, have your partner get moving.

The second phase teaches you to rely less on your manual clitoral stimulation. Gradually stop touching your clitoris a certain time period before your reach climax. You will begin to let the thrusting motions of your partner propel you into orgasm. At first, the time period between ceasing clitoral stimulation and orgasm will be short.

In the third phase, you will begin to increase the amount of time between the end of clitoral stimulation and climax.

You graduate to the next level only when you have successfully passed the test of achieving orgasm through the previous level of non-clitoral stimulation. During any of these phases, you may take as long as you like to complete and pass them. There is absolutely no pressure to move at a fast clip.

Fantasizing

In fact, the psychological aspects of this process definitely need to be mentioned. Our bodies do not exist without our minds. The mind-body connection is a powerful connection that we need to learn to use to our benefit.

When practicing the phases, begin to use your mind to fantasize. It’s one hundred percent OK to do this. To enhance your sexual pleasure, fill your mind with an erotic image that you find very stimulating. This one action alone may be the trigger that sends you directly into orgasm.

It is also important to realize that you need to be in a relaxed state of mind and body when seeking the ultimate sexual pleasure. Shed any inhibitions or old-fashioned notions of what you were always taught that sex should be. Make the sex your own. Slip into a sexy negligee and feel good about yourself. Look at your reflection in the mirror and praise the way you look. Love yourself and let your partner love you.

Enjoy Different Positions

Old-fashioned notions of sex, for the most part, prevent a woman from fully enjoying her sexual experiences. You do not have to always position yourself on the bottom. You are free to get on top, lie side by side, sit down, stand up, or bend over. You are free to experiment with the things you enjoy. Try one of my favorite moves: rub your clitoris on your partner’s pubic bone when he is inside of you. This feels wonderful.

There is NOT one position or one range of motion. If you do not move your pelvis in a manner that sexually pleases you, you are forgoing a great amount of sexual pleasure. So get moving … move your hips side to side, in and out, all around. Make circles, make squares, whatever you feel.

Exercising Your Sex Muscles

As part of this sexercise program, you should also begin toning and strengthening your PC muscle – the muscle that contracts during climax. This is the same muscle that you would use to cease the stream of urine. Start by contracting this muscle in sets of 25 two times per day. Work your way up to sets of 100 twice daily.

Just as regular exercise in a gym promotes a healthy body and lifestyle, exercising our sexual muscles promotes a healthy sex life. Most women who strengthen and tone their PC muscle have an easier time of achieving orgasm through intercourse.

Research suggests that sexually active women achieve orgasm much easier than women who do not engage in sexual intercourse on a regular basis. Sexually active women love their sexuality.

With all of the practice in which you are about to engage, you will be passing all three quizzes linked to the three-part plan will flying colors. The final exam is scheduled at your convenience. Remember that the real test simply proves that you can relax and really enjoy your sexual encounters. The real test is all about increasing your responsiveness to intercourse.

Top 10 Female Masturbation Tips

Jessica Perez — Tue, 14 Jul 2009 14:00:50 +0000

Whether you only have time for a quick feel-good session with yourself, or whether you have all the time in the world, the following list provides a method for every woman to maximize her benefit from a beautiful masturbation experience. Right now, take a little look-see to find out which one(s) fit your personality and schedule.

Skin to Skin Contact

The Pattie Cake

With your pointer and middle fingers, gently pat your clitoris. Vary the pressure and the speed. Your little man in the boat will stand at attention. Your inner labia and clitoris will feel sticky sweet and warm up. The inside of your vagina will overflow with your love fluid. Directly before you come, push those same two fingers into your sticky sweetness. Rub the natural lubricant from inside of you onto your clitoris, and rub hard until you come.

The Sandwich Cookie

Imagine your first two fingers as the hard cookies that sandwich a creamy filling. Gently grip your clitoris between your first two fingers. Stroke your clitoris with your other hand. Vary the pressure and speed until you come.

The Open-Faced Sandwich

Use the palm of your outstretched hand, gently pat and then push down gently. Continue with this rhythm until you begin to feel hot. When you are almost to the end, just push and let go, push and let go, never letting your hand leave skin contact.

The Pulsing Pelvis

Begin touching yourself with your fingers how you like it the best. Start to softly contract your leg muscles in order for your pelvis to gently pulse in a rhythm reminiscent of lovemaking with a partner. Rock up and down, up and down, until you come.

Take a Dip

In the Pool

Spread your legs as far as you can while positioning yourself in front of one of the jets in your pool or hot tub. Stand far enough away from the jet so it is not uncomfortable for you, then move closer and closer until the stimulation is just the right amount to jet you into orgasm.

With Your Shower Head

Use your handheld shower head to masturbate. Actually take the shower head off of its hook and press it on your clitoris. Rub softly. Rub firmly. Alternate between the two extremes, or find a middle ground. Always synchronize your motions to escalate the masturbation experience.

In Your Bathtub

Get into your dry bathtub and sit directly underneath the faucet. Make sure the faucet is aimed directly at your clitoris. Turn the water on warm and let the flow of water hit your clitoris. Use your elbows to hold up your upper body and stick your hands underneath your butt. Right before your orgasm, turn the water temperature to hot … a comfortable hot … and let yourself come.

Common Toys

Dig the Shovel

You can use whatever object turns you on. Pick out a vibrator or anything you like. Mimicking a gently digging motion, use the toy to play with your clitoris. Slide your toy down your clitoris, across your clitoris, and upward, removing the object entirely from your body. Repeat until you reach orgasm.

It’s Electric

When using an electric toothbrush to stimulate your clitoris, simply use it as if it were a vibrator. Touch softly at first, and then as you get more excited, get into a rhythm of hard, soft, or medium pressure. Go up, down, all around, in little circles. Find the motion that suits you the best.

A Play Station

Use a Metal Gear Solid CD on your Sony Playstation, and grab the vibrating controller. Follow the same instructions for the electric toothbrush and the rest is easy. Find yourself. You’ll figure out what to do.

If you have already tried all of the above masturbation tips for women, try adding your own personalized touch on variations to these techniques. If this still isn’t doing it for you, stay tuned for the next set of tips from the professionals.

If you follow the previous tips, you too will experience the self-satisfying beauty of climactic joy through masturbation. When you find something new that works for you, you can share your little secret with your partner.

3 Mistakes That Women Make On How To Give A Massage Handjob

Jessica Perez — Wed, 03 Jun 2009 22:00:59 +0000

Even if you consider you and your partner to have an amazing sex life, there will come a point when you as a woman will not be in the mood to go all the way with him. Or, it could be that you just don’t have the time – but what if you want to help him release some of the sexual tension that he is feeling?

This is where a massage handjob comes in, well, handy. For the most part, your goal should be to stroke him using both of your hands until he reaches a satisfying climax. But if this is your goal, why is it that there are still some women who commit blunders when trying to give their man some manual loving using their hands?

If you want to keep his fire stoked, make sure that you will steer clear of the top 4 mistakes that women make when learning how to give a massage handjob.

Mistake #1: Leading Him On Endlessly & Not Delivering The Goods

Remember that most men want handjobs to be quick and satisfying. As such, you should make sure that when you start stroking his penis, your goal is also to give him a quick and satisfying orgasm.

Sure, you can tease his body a bit first just to get him hard before you zero in on his penis – but the main event should not last forever – otherwise, he may end up wanting to be inside your mouth or to go all the way through penetrative sex.

Mistake #2: Not Being Firm Enough

When you’re pleasuring yourself, you do have a secret touch, stroke or rhythm that drives you over the edge, right? For men, the same thing applies. So if you want to give him a really good handjob, make sure that you know the exact pressure to apply to his penis.

The shaft shouldn’t be handled like it’s an expensive vase – rather, think of it as a beer bottle that you would be gripping firmly and solidly. Better yet, let him show you the type and tightness of a grip that he wants to be applied to his penis so that you can end things quickly, with a bang.

Mistake #3: Not Talking To Him While Doing It

Learning how to give him a massage handjob is as good a time as any to polish your dirty talking skills. Don’t bombard him with questions like “Are you about to come?”. Instead, tease him with images of what you would like to do with him later on when you have more time to engage in some real, hot and sweaty sex.

Steer clear of the top 3 mistakes that women make when giving men a massage handjob – and he’ll practically be your willing slave once you manage to send him over the edge with highly satisfying results.

Now that you already have an idea about the top mistakes that women make on how to give a massage handjob, visit our site to get a blow-by-blow account on how you can tease and stroke him towards one of the most satisfying orgasms of his life.

3 Mistakes That Most Women Make When Brushing Up On Their Skills On How To Give A Handjob

Jessica Perez — Sat, 09 May 2009 22:24:55 +0000

Whether it’s the cramps, the fact that you feel unattractive because you’re still trying to lose the baby weight, you’re PMS’ing or you just plain are not in the mood, there will come a time when you’ll say no to your man’s request to have sex.

If you don’t feel like it, why deny him the pleasure of experiencing sexual relief? If you don’t want to tangle the sheets with him through penetrative sex, you have a perfectly suitable pair of hands to help him relieve the ache.

Besides, even if you are not in the mood, learning how to give a handjob is an essential skill that every woman should learn if she wants to be great in bed. Whether it’s the main event or part of your foreplay, there are a few mistakes that a lot of women make when it comes to giving men handjobs.

Read on to find out what blunders in bed you should not commit when giving him some ‘manual’ love.

Mistake #1: Looking Bored While Doing It

Remember that men are visual creatures. If your goal is to get him to have an orgasm through a handjob, make sure that you are feeling it as well. Despite the fact that it will only be your hands which will do the participating in the major event, don’t look bored while doing it.

Watch how aroused he is getting with your hand’s ministrations. Who knows, you might get aroused by the act of giving him a handjob that you may want to join in the fun later on.

Mistake #2: Not Being Creative Enough On Where To Do It

If you want to be the girlfriend that your man will never forget, you should learn how to surprise him by being game in giving him handjobs in unusual places. The risk of being caught while giving him a handjob while in a semi-public place will add to the thrill, and will definitely amp up the level of sexual excitement for him.

Mistake #3: Focusing All Your Attention To The Shaft

Surprisingly enough, a man’s penis has several sensitive areas that you should not ignore while giving him a handjob. Make sure that you will pay equal attention to his balls, the scrotum, the head of the shaft, the glans and the corona.

Be sensitive to his responses and if you’re both game, you can watch him masturbate himself beforehand. This can be extremely arousing for both of you, and it will give you an idea about the strokes and pace that he likes – tricks that you can use to help him reach an orgasm the next time that you give him a handjob.

Remember that sex involves more than just penetration. There are a lot of pleasures that you both can enjoy in between the act itself, and learning how to give him a handjob is one of them.

Now that you know about the top mistakes that women make on how to give a handjob, visit our site to get a step-by-step guide on how to literally handle him and give him an orgasm that he is not bound to forget anytime soon.

Will Daily Masturbation Affect Puberty?

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 07 May 2009 13:51:42 +0000

Many teenagers have this very question – is masturbation wrong? Does it affect puberty? Will masturbating daily – or masturbating at all – cause health problems? What is the truth when it comes to masturbation?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Is daily masturbation going to halt, alter or harm my progress through puberty? If so, how drastic is it and how long would I have had to been masturbating daily for it to have an effect?

–Anonymous

Old Wives Tales

You might have heard that masturbation can make you go blind. Or it might give you hairy palms, or even make you need glasses. There’s not one bit of truth to any of these claims – in fact, there are no medical problems that are caused by masturbation, even daily masturbation. In fact, masturbation is healthy for both men and women of all ages, especially those going through puberty. The extra hormones produced by your body during puberty cause you to want to satisfy your new sexual needs and urges, and it’s completely natural to do so. Masturbation is a healthy and not to mention safe way to satisfy those desires without worrying about pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. Unfortunately, sex ed in this country is at a low – many adults are afraid to talk to their children about sex and masturbation, so children and teenagers growing up thinking masturbation is wrong and they’re “dirty” for doing it. Grow up people! Masturbation is healthy, safe and a natural way to satisfy those new desires that come with puberty.

How Much Is Too Much?

That said, it is possible that a person – teenager, adult, man or woman – can masturbate too much. Medically speaking, not so much. But what about when it starts interfering with your daily life? What happens if you’re making time in your day for masturbation (instead of just letting it happen naturally and satisfying the desire when it comes along and is convenient) or you’re masturbating 3 or 4 times a day? That’s when it starts crossing the line – and it’s not just masturbation. It can be anything, including television, books, video games or chat rooms. If you find that your daily life is being interrupted by these things – masturbation included – it might be a borderline obsession or addiction that you need to keep in check. Don’t be afraid to talk to a doctor or counselor if you find that you’re masturbating too much – with therapy, they can help you to find other outlets for your stress and extra sexual desires so you don’t feel the need to masturbate so much that it interferes with your daily life.

All in all, masturbation has no bearing on personal growth, puberty or your body at all medically and can, in fact, be healthy for you. We live in the era of the Internet, so don’t be afraid to Google masturbation and find out some good facts for yourself. Look them up on credible websites and keep an eye out for anything that sounds fishy – such as masturbation causing you to have leprosy. Even though the sex ed in this country is lacking, that doesn’t mean you can’t take the initiative to educate yourself! Be safe, smart and informed!

Hand Job Tips – A Few Tid Bits On How To Work Your Man’s “Bits”

Chick In Heels — Mon, 16 Mar 2009 00:36:07 +0000

Ask most men and they will admit that YES, they have experienced a bad hand job or a bad blow job and of course – everyone has likely had the odd lack-lustre sexual experience. I remember prior to having any sexual expertise under my belt, I referred to a friend who literally wrote me out her ‘tips’ on a piece of paper. Years and experiences later I know realize how valuable those pointers were. Since I believe in continuous learning, I figured I’d share my ‘style’ and perhaps it will contain some little tips for you to put on paper – or better yet, into practice!

Giving A Hand Job

Let us begin with the hand job. Simple as it may sound, being good at this technique means paying a LOT of attention to the reactions he gives you. Of course, every man is different and may like things done in certain ways. My input here carries the weight of having had some experience and some excellent feedback!!

First off, do NOT assume it’s a pull toy – the preferred motion is stroking ‘towards’ his body. From what I know most guys want to experience the same sort of movement from your hands or mouth as they would as if you were having intercourse. Of course there is the standard back and forth jerking that most people know. Now, learn to master that with JUST the right amount of grip (I say imagine holding a peeled banana – lightly enough so you don’t smush it at all but firm enough that you’ll have some banana residue on your hands afterwards).

Once that step has been established it’s time to add the ‘twist’. Imagine grasping your forearm and massaging in a twisting motion, this should be a good indication of the tension you are looking for. If your delivery of the twist contains too much grip it could cause your man to wince in pain instead of pleasure. So, if this is your first attempt at the twist then gradually work your grip – pay CLOSE attention to his response – when he looks to be in ecstasy – THAT’S your sweet spot – this is the grip you want – make a mental note.

Taking It To The Next Level

To take this step to the next level work the back and forth motion with a slight twist and you’ve got a move that will make men drool. Advanced hand jobbers can apply the second hand to this motion – starting in the middle of the shaft and working the hands in a twisting motion base to tip and back to the middle again..(imagine every so lightly wringing out a wet cloth, similar idea here). If he’s not in love, he will be lol! All of these moves are enhanced with the use of lube or saliva as well!

With all of these ‘moves’ I suggest starting slow and gradually building up speed – keep in mind this is not a race though, nor do most people desire these motions to be delivered with super speed. In other words, guys and girls tend to like a ramp up to speed when it comes to being digitally pleasured. Ask for feedback ‘is that good?’ ‘do you want it faster or slower?’ – knowing what your partner enjoys is vital!! Plus, say it in a sexy voice and that just adds to the allure.

What About Blow Jobs?

Regarding blow jobs, from what I’ve heard one of the biggest complaints that men have about receiving a bad blow job (sounds like an oxymoron but it does exist lol!) is that some women suck too hard. When giving a blow job use finesse, keep it wet and loose and ALWAYS bring in the tongue play. Never get into Hoover mode – save that for the hickeys alone! Always remember, soft and wet, take it in, continue to work your hands at the base creating continuous motion.

To drive him over the edge, work your tongue just under the tip, this is one of the most sensitive areas for men guaranteed to drive him wild! One of my signature moves is slow slippery circles of my tongue just under the tip. Most guys love the idea of a woman being able to take him into her mouth deeply. Relax your mouth and once in a while go as far down as you can. Whether you reach the baseline or not, the attempt will be greatly appreciated!! Another no-no would be the use of teeth when giving a blow job. It takes a skilled woman to know how to successfully and ‘ever-so-feather-lightly’ use her teeth when giving a blow job. If you do cross that line be on guard for any and every flinch!

Most guys also LOVE a good lick job. Incorporate this with your blow job skills and you’re away to the races! Lick his shaft and tip as if you were licking an ice cream cone. Up and down, all around the sides – he will be quivering with excitement!

Getting Into The “Nether” Regions

Anyone giving tips regarding how to give a good hand job or blow job would be remiss if they left out the added bonus of working your man’s testicles, or ‘boys’ as I like to call them.. Now, if there is one thing you need to know about the ‘boys’ it’s that they are extremely sensitive so whatever attention you give to them needs to be done with that in mind. A feather light touch goes a long way when it comes to the ‘boys’. I have yet to meet a guy who doesn’t love to have some attention paid to them though.

Be it a caress or a slippery lick, if it’s gentle, it’s good! I do however, have a move – that when executed correctly can be very intense for your fella. When giving a blow job or hand job I use my other hand to gently pull my thumb down the middle of the scrotum between the testicles and hold it there. This causes the skin on the shaft to pull down creating even more intensity at the tip while tightening up the skin around the ‘boys’ thus making them even more sensitized. A little side note here, if your guy ‘manscapes’ (a.k.a. shaves) his ‘boys’ then you know he likely desires you to venture down there for some extended play.

Hopefully this gives you some ideas on how to work your man. It’s a good place to start anyway.. never forget though, pay attention to the reactions you get, ask what they like and be attentive. Communication is key to the best sex life you can have!

Can Masturbation Help Prevent Getting Erections At The Wrong Time?

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 19:28:32 +0000

It’s every guy’s worst nightmare – having an erection at the wrong time, whether you’re in class, at the office or on a casual date with a girl you really like.

Having an erection at the wrong time can be embarrassing and it can be even more embarrassing and frustrating trying to hide it. Can masturbating often or at the right times help prevent unwanted erections?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Do you know if it is a common occurrence for a guy to masturbate not so much for the direct pleasure (although it is nice) but to not have any “urges”? I often masturbate so I won’t get them at the “wrong” times. Is that a common occurrence?

Erections are a natural thing!

An erection for a man is his body’s way of letting him know that there’s tension there,sexual or not, that needs to be relieved. It signals arousal but there are times where a man can get an erection and he’s not thinking about sex nor is he aroused at all.

An erection is simply when extra blood flows to the penis, making it stiffer instead of more relaxed. This can happen often and it is known for happening at some of the most inopportune times.

Masturbating to relieve tension.

Almost every man (if not every man) masturbates at some time or another. Many men masturbate often, especially if they’re not sexually active, while some masturbate less.

However often a man needs to masturbate is generally considered healthy, with the exception of often forgoing sexual intercourse with your partner in lieu of masturbation or masturbating to the point of physical harm.

Masturbating helps to relieve tension and yes, it can help to prevent erections at the wrong time.

When to masturbate?

Many men masturbate in the mornings before a day at the office so they can put the focus on their work, while others prefer to masturbate less often. If you want to use masturbation as a means to prevent unwanted erections, try going without masturbation for a few days and note when your erections seem to happen.

Do they happen at a certain time or when you see a certain person? Learn your triggers. There may be more than a few and sometimes it can be hard to figure out what the triggers are, but it’s helpful to have at least a little background knowledge on when you seem to get unwanted erections before you use masturbation as a tool to prevent them.

Use your triggers to prevent unwanted erections.

Once you figure out roughly when and why you’re having these erections, you can use masturbation to help prevent them.

If you find that the majority of your erections happen in the afternoon, perhaps you can go home on your lunch break and relieve some of the tension.

If you find that your unwanted erections seem to happen before a big date or in the evenings, try masturbating right when you get home from work or before the date to help keep your penis from becoming erect when you’re trying to focus on other things.

Regular masturbation for men, and women, is healthy and helps keep the body and sexual organs healthy. Masturbation and the resulting orgasms can be a source of stress relief for both men and women and can help men from becoming erect when they least expect it or want to be erect.

If you have a sexual partner, you can also use regular sexual intercourse or other types of sex to relieve tension in the same way.

eXtreme Sex Ed: Help! I Feel Like A Spectator During Sex!

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 19:12:37 +0000

If you’re new at sex or are just new to your partner, it might be difficult for you to get “into” your partner.

Things might seem awkward at first and it can be frustration to experience sexual intimacy with your partner without being really “into” it. How can you get more into your partner and more into sex with them?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I want to tell my bf what I like in bed, but I don’t know how, because I don’t masturbate? (That’s right! – remember from before Scarlett is a pastor’s kid…) I feel like a spectator during sex. I find it hard to relax and I don’t think I’ve ever had an orgasm. Please help.

–Scarlett, NJ

Finding Out What You Want

For you to get “into” sex, it’s important for you to experiment with what turns you on. If you don’t know what turns you on and what gets you excited, it’s hard not to feel like a spectator when you’re actually doing the deed. How do you do that? One of the greatest ways to experiment with what you like is to masturbate.

Use your hands, a detachable shower head or even toys to find out what feels the best. You can masturbate with your partner if you prefer, or you can masturbate alone to really try new things and find out what really gets you going.

It’s difficult to get into sex and share with your partner what you like without first knowing yourself.

Get Into The Game

One of the best ways to find out what you like during sex and really get into it is to just dive in and do it! Spend time experimenting with different techniques, including genital massage, oral sex and sexual intercourse.

You might like simultaneous oral sex or you might really enjoy your partner using their hands on you.

You’ll never know though if you don’t try! Have sex with your partner and make mental notes of what you don’t like and what you really don’t want to try again. Next time, try something new.

Continue to do this until you find a few things that you really enjoy doing with your partner. Make a mental note of these and when you’re feeling turned on, you and your partner can use these things to get you really excited and into it.

Make sure both partners get equal satisfaction. It’s easy for a woman to feel like a spectator during sex if the focus is on the man. Share each other equally and take turns pleasuring each other until you build up to an amazing climax!

Talk With Your Partner

While you want to be careful about how you approach this subject, it’s important to talk with your partner and be open and honest with them about what you like and don’t like.

Don’t criticize your partner for moves that you don’t like, instead suggest new ones that you’d like to try.

If you close the lines of communication and never let your partner know what feels good and what doesn’t, you’ll never be “into” your partner or even “into” sex with them.

Use Trial and Error

Similarly, your partner can share with you what they like so together you can experiment with what works and forget about what doesn’t.

With a little trial and error, you and your partner will learn what you like and what you don’t like, making it easier for you to have successful intimate encounters. Take it slow if you need to and stay open and honest with your partner. Don’t get discouraged and keep trying. You’ll never find out what turns you on and gets you into it if you don’t try!

How To Make Love Making a Real Love Making Experience With Touch

Carla Tara — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 19:24:28 +0000

People have forgotten the simplest lovemaking ‘technique’ of all: the incredible power of human touch. Even when the opportunity arises in lovemaking sessions for us to give and receive the pleasure of the caress, we tend to get caught up in the drive to ejaculatory orgasms.

Making Lovemaking a Real Love Making Experience

Admittedly, ejaculatory orgasms produce intense pleasure, but without the slow build up of conscious touch, it is more like a sneeze in the groin, just a release of tension, than a deeply satisfying experience that “makes love grow” (love making).

Unfortunately for many people, sex encounters become more mutual masturbation than real love building experiences.

Tantra invites us to take time to thoroughly touch each other to increase arousal across the entire body. Our skin is our biggest organ and needs caring love and attention. But the Tantric touch, the conscious touch, goes deeper than the skin.

Using Conscious Touch

“Conscious touch” means that you are not thinking of something else. Your attention is fully on your lover, how they breathe and how they take in your touch. Your conscious touch stirs up energy, opening up both the heart and the flow of sexual energy in the form of weak electronic waves that continue to build up until they become larger waves that encompass the entire body.

Sometimes we touch how we want to be touched instead of tuning in to see how our lover likes it. If you notice your lover caught up in their own thoughts, notice how you are touching them. Ask if they would like a softer or stronger, slower or faster touch. This will get their attention back, and you will get a chance to give them the touch they desire.

Touch is both sensuous and healing. The most obvious emissaries of love are our arms, and the focal points from which love flows are the palms. When we touch our loved ones, we help them heal from any pain or disappointment they experience during the day, and they feel that life is worth living just to be touched by you.

Connecting Your Intention With Your Breath

When you connect your intention to your breath, you will feel their muscles sucking in that attention, all the way down to the bones. Yes, bones need love and attention, too, and your intention connected with your breath is powerful enough to penetrate deeply.

Tantric people know that touching a lover does not have to end in ejaculation. Some women cringe when their men start touching them because they know it will end up in intercourse and they might not be in the mood.

I invite men to set up a “just touching time” with your beloved. Then, even when she gets excited you keep your agreement of “just touching” during that time. Doing this often, you build up trust in your word, and she will be touched with joy anytime you do so.

And I promise you that both of you will have an incredibly great time touching and making love.

To learn more about Carla Tara, visit www.1Tantra.com.

How to Finger A Girl

Lee Jenkins — Sun, 07 Sep 2008 12:56:22 +0000

There’s a real, hot sexiness to being able to bring your woman to a climax by just using your fingers.

Consider the fact that her body is – literally – under the command of your fingers and that you are able to WATCH her intently as you bring her to writhing pleasure.

Now, isn’t that sexy and hot?

Here are some tips on how to finger a girl:

Pre-Fingering Foreplay

Surprisingly, not all women like to be fingered by their lovers. This can be due to many reasons such as issues about hygiene, trust and may be even fear.

If your partner has some of these issues, it may be wise to pre-discuss the topic of fingering beforehand just to ensure that she’s at least open to the idea of it happening. Otherwise, you can slowly introduce fingering as you make love.

But before that, here’s rule No. 1: engage in foreplay! Foreplay ensures that you and your partner are in the right sexual frame of mind and body needs, making her just possibly a bit more open to being fingered.

Explore The Landscape Gently

If this is your first time to finger her, then ensure that you do everything you can to avoid any hang ups. For instance, ensure that your nails are cut and that your hands are clean (takes care of the issue of hygiene).

But more importantly, be gentle in your finger exploration. A woman’s body is all warmness and softness, right? As such, don’t go in there like an excited teenager. Instead, be respectful of her body as you go in and explore.

Also, using your fingers to simulate a woman’s genitals is not just about insertion. Be sure you pay attention to her labia (genital lips) and clitoris too.

Experiment With Different Textures, Pressures, And Movements

Not all parts of a woman’s genital area can be stimulated in the exact same way. For instance, a lot of women like their labia to be gently caressed, their clitoris to be rubbed and their G-spots to be tapped.

Now – again – not all women are the same so find the right combination that your lover finds the most sexually stimulating. And of course, as you try all these different sexual stimulation combos, don’t forget to pay attention to her! Moaning is good, jerking is not.

Time Is Of No Consequence

Don’t go about fingering your woman with a certain time frame in mind. You may ‘hit the jackpot’ right away, maybe not. Just give both yourselves time to get used to the different sensations. This is actually one of those times when the journey is as good as the destination.

How To Deal With Fingering Fatigue

In the course of your exploration, you might find yourself getting a tad tired but don’t give up and especially, don’t just stop and leave your lover in the cold! If you’re feeling a bit tired, try any of these: switch hands if you can, stop finger stimulation and go oral for a few minutes, stop finger stimulation and use a sex toy for a while, and others.

More Tips on How To Finger A Girl

Lube, anyone? Finger stimulation works best if your partner is really wet. If not, ensure you have a healthy backup of lube ready for use.
Learn and be a voyeur at the same time. Not sure how to please her down there? If so, ask her to masturbate in front of you so that you learn how to pleasure her exactly the way she wants it.
Learn when to stop. As you become more and more enthralled about bringing your lover to an orgasm just by using your fingers, it’s equally important to know when to stop trying. Too much friction can actually numb her genitals and when that occurs, reaching a climax is almost next to impossible so better stop now… and start again another day.
Learn effective fingering techniques! Head over to the link below to learn 2 step-by-step “Advanced Fingering Techniques” to bring your lover to multiple escalating orgasms.

Can I Get STDs From Masturbation?

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 19 Aug 2008 13:57:45 +0000

Masturbation is a great pleasure for both men and women. It can relieve stress and satisfy sexual desires without having intercourse with someone else.

You might be curious, however, if masturbation falls in the same category as sex, oral sex and erotic massage when it comes to sexually transmitted diseases.

While you can’t transmit or contract STD’s from masturbation or toys, unless you share your toys with someone else, does that mean you’re safe from everything?

If I masturbate without toys (just with my hands) can I get and STDs or other sicknesses?

The Skinny On STD’s

Sexually transmitted diseases are spread when an infected person shares bodily secretions or blood with another person. This usually happens during sex, but it can be transmitted in other ways as well, as long as secretions are shared. While you can contract a sexually transmitted disease from another person if they’re infected, it’s very difficult to contract a sexually transmitted disease if you’re simply masturbating.

This would only happen if your hands happened to come into contact with an infected person’s bodily secretions and these secretions made their way into your genitals by being passed on from your hands. This can actually be prevented with simple hand washing. In light of this, however, masturbation is the second safest sex next to no sex at all. If you’ve never had any sexual partners, you can’t transmit STD’s to yourself through masturbation, as well as if you’ve recently been tested for STD’s and haven’t had a sexual partner since.

Simply put, if your hands come into contact with any bodily fluids of another person, such as blood, semen or vaginal secretions, and then you masturbate, there is a very small possibility that you can contract STD’s through masturbation. How can you make absolutely sure you’re safe?

Simply Safe

Being a safe masturbator is actually fairly simple. Always keep your hands clean and make sure they’re washed before masturbation. Even if you don’t have any sexual partners, bacteria on hands that haven’t been washed can cause an infection.

Easy As Soap and Water

If you use toys during masturbation, make sure your toys are clean before each and every use as well. Soap and warm water will do the trick, although there are special cleaners for sex toys available at many stores and online.

It’s safer not to share your sex toys with other people, but if you do, make sure they’re washed in between each use and in between each partner. By washing your hands and your sex toys regularly and keeping them clean, you can keep any bacteria or other infectious organisms at bay.

While there is a very small, almost non-existent chance of contracting an STD from masturbation if you’ve been sexually active with other partners and have gotten blood or bodily fluids on your hands, regular hand washing and hand washing before masturbation will pretty much eliminate any risk involved.

Unless you’re abstaining from any sexual contact with yourself and others, masturbation is the safest form of sex around. Make sure you’re masturbation habits include good hygiene and you can enjoy relieving stress and satisfying your sexual desires without worry.

Are You STILL Afraid Of Being Naked?

Brad Howard — Sun, 27 Jul 2008 15:44:22 +0000

Sheer terror. You know the EXACT moment I’m talking about.

You’ve just gotten your new woman into bed, the lights are out (thank GOD!), and you’ve been pleasuring her to no end… touching… teasing… kissing… the place is ON FIRE.

You gently slide between her legs.

She gaps… and pulls you in closer… with her hands rubbing up and down your body… over your arms… over your back… and all of the sudden… out of nowhere… you UNCOMFORTABLY think to yourself:

“Oh shit, she just felt my fat roll”

“Oh shit, she thinks my arms are too skinny, I think she felt bone”

And at that single moment, a PRIMAL fear comes over you… “What if she… STOPS?!?”

Guys really don’t think they need to work out

I have to confess, in reality, no guy ever REALLY thinks that they need to work out, exercise, or get in better shape until a woman sees them naked. Sure, it seems like its a good idea… you know, for better health and all.

But you take a guy that’s standing naked for the FIRST time in front of a woman that he’s had his eye on… that he NEVER THOUGHT that he could land… and the phrase “sense of urgency” starts to take on new meaning.

When it hits

Do you think that this might play a little havoc on your inner game? You betcha it does.I’ve talked to your women.

What women say

And here’s what they’ve said.

Number 1: Most men that are ashamed of their bodies tend to be more TIMID in bed. They tend to lay on top of women, instead of pulling back… letting her see ALL OF YOU… including the “action” of your pecker moving in and out.

Number 2: Every man that they’ve been with that gets in better shape becomes a MUCH better lover overall. The “man” and his “skills” are the same… but her perception changes… as well as…

Number 3: Men that are in shape can DO MORE for LONGER than their out of shape counterparts. Lifting, moving, throwing, thrusting, etc… you get the drift.

Think about this for a second. Ask yourself this question. Is my woman thinking about ME when she masturbates? (she’s likely not)

And if she is…

HOW would those thoughts change if I was now built like a Greek God?

Food for thought…

Getting the proper proportions is simply a matter of applying the number one physical attraction metric for men… The Adonis Index. To find out how to use the Adonis Index to generate subconscious physical attraction, visit the Adonis Effect website.

Self Pleasure – Enjoying Erotica on Your Own…

Alicia Night Orchid — Tue, 22 Jul 2008 14:35:57 +0000

Janie, a bachelorette, travels constantly on business. After a long day of intense sales calls, she retires to her room where she eats alone, checks e-mail, and prepares for the next day’s work.

By the end of the evening, she’s too edgy to sleep and a little lonely. She could saunter down to the lobby bar, but the thought of picking up a stranger has little appeal in today’s world of dangerous STDs.

She could call one of the men she dates from time to time, but doesn’t want to come across as needy. She could watch a pay-for-view movie ADULT movie, but doesn’t want to explain that charge to her employer.

Faced with those alternatives, she often ends the day snuggled up in bed with her laptop. She reads an erotic e-book by a favorite author. With one hand on the keyboard and the other under the covers, she gives herself some well-deserved “personal time.”

Afterwards, she sleeps like a baby.

Nathan and Bri have a great sex life, and Nathan’s as crazy in love with his wife as the day they married three years ago. Even so, he has fantasies of a threesome involving Bri, him, and another woman. In his favorite fantasy, Bri and the other woman begin kissing while he watches.

One thing leads to another and soon the women are naked on the floor, making love. After they’ve driven each other over the edge, the two women turn their attention to him.

So far, Nathan has refrained from sharing his fantasy with Bri, because he knows she’s strictly a one-man woman.

But once a week, when she’s out with her friends, he indulges himself with a box of Kleenex, a favorite lubricant, and a visit to a website featuring erotic stories about threesomes. He prefers the slow build-up and exotic settings offered by the stories to video porn’s bright lights, close-up shots, and predictability.

In the back of his mind, he harbors the hope that Bri will some day turn his fantasy into reality.

Katie and Patrick have been together for four years. They’re in a committed relationship, but Katie has come to realize that she needs more sex than Patrick.

He’s pre-occupied with starting a new business and happy with their twice a week routine. For her part, she’d prefer a trip down the “O” highway every day.

She’s not opposed to a furtive moment alone in the shower or a solitary fling on the day bed before Patrick returns home from work. But what works best for Katie is curling up in front of the fire or in the chaise lounge with a steamy period romance and a favorite vibrator.

She secretly hopes Patrick will find her books and want to see what she does with that vibrator while she reads.

Doing it by the Book

Masturbation, wanking, play time.

Call it what you like, it’s something we all do. In fact, Kinsey Institute research shows that 90 percent of all men over the age of 18 “toss one off” on a regular basis, while 65 percent of all women “rub one out” now and then.

The percentages are lower for married couples, but a Playboy survey found that 72 percent of married men masturbate, while a Redbook survey revealed that 68 percent of married women join in the fun.

Yet, when confronted with these percentages, many people are embarrassed to admit that they aren’t much different from everyone else when it comes to self pleasure.

Furthermore, even if we confess to an occasional personal dalliance, we’re likely to characterize it as a “moment of weakness.” In the words of the old “Seinfeld” episode, we take pride in being “masters of our own domain.”

But the truth is that “humming to our own music” is a more purposeful activity than we may like to own up to. Drawings of men and women engaged in sex are among the earliest and most prevalent art to adorn the walls of caves.

The first writings on sex can be traced to ancient Chinese and Indian cultures, and the public areas of Greek and Roman cities often contained art work depicting copulation, oral sex, and self pleasure.

It’s a good bet that our ancestors were using that art work and those writings to enhance not only their sex lives with partners, but also their solo sex. And based on the current market demand for erotica and porn, it’s likely that many of us today rely on sexy stories, photos, and videos to make our private time more enjoyable.

In fact, if the e-mail and blog comments I receive are any indication, I’m pretty sure that most readers of my stories and books are of the one-handed variety.

Bottom line

Most researchers and therapists view masturbation as a common and natural activity. If we’re going to do it, why not enjoy it to the fullest? If a hot story or a sexy book produces warm and fuzzies down below or indulges a particular fantasy, why not go with it?

Masturbation doesn’t need to be shameful or guilt-ridden, it can be a celebration of our singular sexuality, purposefully undertaken and augmented with erotica we love.

Doing it Without My Partner

A question that often arises is whether it’s harmful to a relationship when one or both partners masturbate in isolation to “dirty stories.” The concern is that solo masturbation, with or without the aid of erotica, is a form of “cheating,” and we all know how damaging that can be to a relationship.

But most researchers agree that couples should not be troubled by masturbation in a relationship so long as (1) it doesn’t take the place of sex between partners; and (2) neither partner’s self esteem is lowered by the other partner’s self enjoyment.

Remember Janie, Nathan, and Katie from the beginning of this article? Janie played with herself to the accompaniment of the bookmarked sections of her favorite e-book, when she was on the road and away from boyfriends.

Nathan indulged a fantasy his wife had little interest in, but it didn’t lessen his attraction to his wife. And Katie used erotica and masturbation to supplement her sex life with her husband.

It’s hard to see how anyone’s relationship was damaged.

Bottom Line: Open communication with your spouse or partner is always the best route. Talk about your sexual desires and fantasies. Come to an understanding about what both of you need, keeping in mind that sex is a mystery and that each person’s desires are valid and unique.

Why Is Masturbation So Taboo?

Paul Carlson — Mon, 21 Jul 2008 13:00:54 +0000

There are many rumors and taboos associated with masturbation.

Does it cause blindness? Does it cause hairy palms? Is it wrong? Is it unhealthy? Does it cause premature ejaculation?

Exploring the origin of the taboo behind masturbation and the scientific studies associated with it can lead to a clearer understanding of what masturbation is and what it definitely isn’t.

Why is masturbation so taboo? Could this be one of the reasons that so many men suffer from premature ejaculation?

Where did it go wrong?

Masturbation has been around since really, the dawn of time. Masturbation for women is relatively newer, but since man learned he had a penis, he learned what he could do with it. As humankind evolved, we evolved into a society with religion, morals and beliefs.

Some religions suggested that masturbation was wrong and that spilling one’s “seed” outside of procreation was a sin. This was generally because at that time in the world, cultures were looking to expand and bring about more and more people.

That ideation, however, didn’t stop when the world had enough (and more than enough) people in it. It’s a view that continues to be held today in certain cultures.

That in and of itself doesn’t mean that masturbation is wrong though. It’s up to you to decide whether morally, you believe that masturbation is something that makes you comfortable.

Scientifically, where does masturbation stand?

Studies done on masturbation show that 98% of men masturbate. It’s simply a fact of life.

Some of these men do it in secret and are shamed by it because of the culture that they grew up in while others accept it as a necessary but pleasurable activity. To others, it’s just no big deal and it happens.

Masturbation doesn’t cause hairy palms or blindness and is considered by many in the medical community to be a healthy way to reduce the testosterone levels in the body and release some of the day’s frustrations and aggravations.

Some studies have even shown that people who have three orgasms a week are known to have a life expectancy that is seven or eight years longer than someone who doesn’t have orgasms that often.

Does masturbation cause premature ejaculation?

Premature ejaculation is mainly caused by the physiological response to too much testosterone in the body. Ejaculation is one way to release it and when the time comes for an orgasm, it may end up happening too soon. This can happen during masturbation or during sexual intercourse, but masturbation isn’t to blame.

Someone who doesn’t masturbate at all may even have problems with premature ejaculation. If you find that you’re ejaculating too soon, whether you’re masturbating or having sexual intercourse, seek help from your doctor. He or she will have some questions to ask you and based on your answers, they’ll come up with a treatment plan for you.

While masturbation is becoming more widely accepted, some cultures and some individuals still hold outdated views on the subject. Science proves that masturbation is healthy and can even add spice to your sex life, release frustration and increase life expectancy.

If masturbation is something you enjoy, find the appropriate time and place for it and go for it! If it’s something that you’re comfortable with and that brings you pleasure, don’t let anyone else’s beliefs or morals get in your way. It only matters what you think!

Does Masturbation Really Cause Blindness?

Paul Carlson — Fri, 18 Jul 2008 13:47:53 +0000

There are a great number of taboos on masturbation and there have been since almost the beginning of time. You might have heard that masturbation causes blindness or that masturbation makes your palms hairy.

While you might already know that these are old wives tales, it still might leave you with the question, “is masturbation right?” Whether it’s ‘right’ or not is something you need to decide for yourself, but masturbation isn’t unhealthy by any means.

Does masturbation really cause blindness? Are there any medical concerns with masturbation?

Where did the taboo come from?

In many cultures, the taboo on masturbation stems from religion. When some religions came about, they considered that “wasting the seed” was a sin and therefore men shouldn’t masturbate.

The only approved sexual stimulation was sexual intercourse in order to procreate. At that point in the world, there were very few people and more people were needed to make tribes and different religious sects stronger and more profitable.

Masturbation was considered ‘wrong’ because instead of making a new person for the religion or tribe, you were . . . well, ‘wasting’ the seed.

Unfortunately, this taboo has been carried across decades and while there is no longer the issue of not having enough people around, in those religions and cultures masturbation is still looked down upon and considered a sin.

How do I know if it’s wrong for me?

While statistics show that the majority of men (and many women) masturbate, some people still feel that it’s wrong. Really think about your morals and your beliefs and whether masturbation makes you feel bad or not. If you find yourself feeling guilty afterwards, then by all means feel free to curtail your masturbation until it suits you.

Chances are though, you’re in the majority of people who enjoy masturbation and feel that there’s nothing wrong with it. Don’t let anyone try to impose their belief system on you. If you enjoy masturbation and feel that there’s nothing wrong with it, enjoy!

Will it hurt me?

Masturbation isn’t going to cause you anything but soreness and that’s only if you end up masturbating too much. You might get a little raw and if you do, you can stop masturbating for awhile and it will go away. Masturbating using lotions or lubricants can keep you from experiencing any rawness or dryness of the skin in that area.

Masturbation won’t cause headaches, blindness or even hairy palms and you won’t run out of sperm either. Your body will simply produce more. Masturbation can even be considered healthy, as it can add stimulation to both men’s and women’s sex lives.

When can I masturbate?

There’s the key – finding the appropriate time for masturbation. If your partner dislikes your masturbation habits, make sure to do it away from them or when they’re not home. Don’t masturbate out in public and certainly don’t do it with someone who is not a consenting adult. Masturbation is mostly done alone in the privacy of your own home.

While some cultures and religions still feel that masturbation is wrong, many more are beginning to accept it as health studies show that it’s a completely safe and even healthy activity. Whatever you choose to do, make sure it’s what makes you comfortable.

If you enjoy masturbation like most people, just find an appropriate time and place to enjoy yourself. You can even masturbate with your partner to enhance your sex life!

Peeping Tom – How Do I Turn My Fantasy Into Reality?

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 18 Jun 2008 14:33:53 +0000

Voyeurism. Watching. Peeping.

It’s not all bad…

Many people find themselves in the situation where they’re watching someone having sex, and they’re a little surprised to find out they enjoy it.

Everyone has a little bit of voyeurism in them, but what happens if you want to take it to the next level? What is okay and what isn’t?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Living next door is a beautiful girl my age. We are both 18. We have been friends and have flirted and done other fun things. My bedroom looks over at hers. I have sometimes seen her undressing and doing other sexy things. The other night I saw another guy in her room. They were making out. The shades were left open. To be honest I would like to see her doing it. I would like to watch them have sex. What suggestions would you give for me watching them without being caught? Could she want me to see her having sex? I want to do it with her, if I see them doing it. Should I tell her? What would I say? How do I say that I would like to be with her?

-Roger, PA

Do they know I’m watching?

Most of the time, someone who wants to be watched or doesn’t care will leave their window curtains or blinds up. Chances are, this is what happened if you’re able to get a good view of your neighbor or someone else while they’re undressing or having sex. It’s actually very unlikely that they don’t know you’re watching.

Does that make it right? It depends. If you’re having to do a lot of maneuvering, such as using binoculars or there just happens to be this one spot in the blinds that allows you to get a view, it’s probable that your object of affection doesn’t want to be watched. You might want to back off, because this could get you in a fair amount of trouble.

If they’re leaving their blinds wide open and you can see them while eating your dinner, you can be pretty sure they’re doing it intentionally.

Is it okay to watch them?

If you’ve been watching someone, such as an attractive neighbor or friend, undress and possibly even have sex with another person, you’ll likely find yourself quite turned on. This is normal. We all like to watch someone have sex in some form or another. Why do you think pornography is such a successful industry? If you find that you’re interested in taking your peeping to the next level, you’re not the only one.

How can I approach them?

This can be tricky. You don’t want to start out the conversation by saying, “So . . . I’ve been watching you.” That can lead to some pretty uncomfortable situations. Just approach them the same way you would approach anyone with whom you are interested in starting a relationship. Ask them out on a date, or have coffee with them. If you really want to take it to the next level, get yourself on neutral ground with them so you can get to know them outside of their bedroom.

Can’t I just keep peeping?

If you’re intimidated by asking them out, you might be inclined to just continue to watch them from afar. This can develop into unhealthy obsessions, so this is not something you want to do.

Take a break from the peeping and find a real partner to hang out with, even if it’s not the person you’ve been watching. You’ll find that spending time with a real, live, breathing person is far better than watching someone through a window. If you find yourself unable to let go and you continue to peep, you may want to seek help.

All in all, watching your neighbor or someone else undress or have sex can be enticing and fun if they’re leaving their blinds wide open enough for you to see it. It’s perfectly fine to show normal interest in them and even ask them out on a date and spend time with them in the real world. Don’t make peeping a habit though. It can turn into an ugly habit that you can’t break away from.

My Vagina Is Too Small To Enjoy Sex – What Can I Do?

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 20 May 2008 14:11:47 +0000

There are many women who have never had an orgasm.

For those who have regular or multiple orgasms, this seems absurd. But for the women who truly have never experienced one, it’s a painful reality.

Fortunately, there is help on the horizon for women who want to enjoy sex with their partners and end up feeling satisfied after a climax.

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

My husband and I, of 7 months, are rarely having sex.

I was told by OBGYN that I was so small in the vaginal region that I should purchase dilators to prevent tearing. I have never torn but honestly do not enjoy sex with my husband. We do talk about it openly and honestly, but in the end, it’s not rewarding for me, and to top it off my husband says “men never have bad sex” what a charmer.

As a good Christian wife, how can I find ways to enjoy it and or have an orgasm? never happened. Suggestions?

-Tabby, TX

Get your doctor’s advice.

Look to your OBGYN for an explanation first. Is your vagina too small? Is your cervix tilted, making your G-spot harder to get to? There are many things that your OBGYN can do to help. If that road goes nowhere, you can always get the help of a sex therapist.

Sex therapists are wonderful. They’ll get you back on track with your sex life by helping you open up and discover both the physical and psychological reasons that are keeping you from having an orgasm.

Try new things.

Many women who have never had an orgasm admit to never having masturbated or tried a sexual position other than missionary during intercourse with their partners. First of all, masturbation is one of the best ways to learn about your body and to learn how you like to be touched and what feels good. If you don’t know what feels good and what will bring you to orgasm, how will your partner know?

You need to be in control so you can give your partner a few directions during the deed to help him to get you to climax. If you don’t feel comfortable masturbating, start slow. Start by touching yourself just a few times and go from there. Relax. Masturbation by men and women is a completely natural thing.

Second, missionary positions rarely lead to orgasms for women so if that’s all you’ve tried or the position you use regularly, it’s a good idea to try a few new positions to figure out which one works the best. Many women love to be on top.

They can control the speed and depth of penetration as well as gain clitoral friction to help them reach orgasm faster and have a more powerful climax. There are dozens and dozens of different positions that you can try. Don’t be afraid to speak up and let your partner know that you’d like to do it “this way” for a change. He’ll probably be more than happy to roll with the punches.

You can also incorporate other things such as sex toys and lubricants to enhance sexual play. If you’ve never tried oral sex either, that can be a wonderful way to achieve orgasm and since the pleasure is focused solely on the woman, it allows her to revel in what feels good and orgasms will often come naturally this way.

The point is to experiment. If you’ve never had an orgasm, don’t continue doing the same thing you’re doing, hoping that one will come along someday. Mix it up, try new things and see where they take you. If you find a good position or a good toy to use, make note of it and use it more often. Experimenting and trying new things in the bedroom is all part of a healthy sexual relationship, so give it a shot!

How to Get a Woman to Masturbate on the Phone With You – Phone Sex for HER Pleasure

David Wygant — Wed, 07 May 2008 15:52:57 +0000

Khiem and I are walking right now with Yakub, and we’re hanging out and doing what we call a “brainstorm day.”

Well, actually they both goofed off on some weird internet sites for a little while which they didn’t share with me and they downloaded things to my Mac which sort of scares me a little bit, but at least I’ll have some fun entertainment when I get home.

But we were all hiking and talking, and they were asking me, “What are the secrets of how to get her to masturbate for you on the telephone?”

Now, I’ve been somebody who has absolutely enjoyed the benefits of phone sex even before women got to enjoy the benefits of the Blackberry-vibrating phone sex! How to get a woman to masturbate for you on the phone is really very simple.

Use what you know

First, you have to call them late at night. Let’s say you’ve been emailing this woman back and forth. You’ve been flirting in emails back and forth, and maybe you’ve had a couple of phone conversations, and she tells you she’ll be around that night for you two to talk.

What you need to do in that email or text message is ask, “How late can I call you? I want you to be really cozy and comfortable when I call, so you’re not thinking anything about the day.” Then she’ll tell you how late you can call.

So then you call her that late – 11 o’clock at night. She’s in bed, she’s wearing her little jammies, and you start conversing with her. You talk to her about emotions, about anything that has to do with a deep topic. Because remember sex for a woman starts in her mind. You need to connect with her.

You can’t get on the phone with her and say, “So what are you wearing right now? Do you want to masturbate with me on the phone?” No! It’s about connecting.

Phone sex foreplay

Picture it as foreplay – or phoneplay! What you need to do is just talk to her a little bit, get to know her a little bit, make a comment on something you guys have shared together – maybe this is like the first or second phone call, and you’ve learned things about her.

Maybe she’s told you that she really loves deep conversations. You can say to her, “Man, I really love deep conversations with you. I love to get to know you better. It’s so much fun. I’m enjoying exploring you. I’m enjoying penetrating your mind.” When you talk in very subliminal sexual ways, it will make her very sexually turned on.

Most guys make the biggest mistake: a woman is talking to you late at night, you’re having an emotional conversation and you’re connecting, and the guy will immediately ruin it by saying, “Are you wet right now?” Or “You know, my cock’s hard. You want to feel it?”

You don’t want to say that! What you have to assume is that she’s already turned on. What I like to do is use very subliminal language. “I’m having so much fun connecting with you now.” That’s foreplay in her mind. “I’m having a great time learning about you.” “Wow, I wish I was sitting right there with you right now, seeing your eyes during this conversation” That’s another thing to say to her…

Or say, “Oh my God, did we just have like a kiss moment?” when you are talking about something. There’s a pause, and you both feel it. Then you need to get a bit more daring. Say, “Did we just have a kiss moment?” and she’ll say, “Well, yeah, I think so!” Then you can say, “Alright, let’s play true confession. If I was there right now, what would you want to do?”

And then she’ll tell you. If she feels comfortable, she’ll say, “Oh, I really want to kiss you and touch you right now.” You can say, “Touch me? I barely even know you! How do you know I’ll even let you?” You want to be a little bit playful.

Then she’ll say, “Oh come on. What do you want to do?” And then you tell her.

What I always say over and over again is, “If I was there right now, I would look deep inside your eyes. I would kiss you. I would look at you, and I want to feel your energy. I want to look and see what I stir up inside you after I kiss you.”

How to know when she’s getting into it

All of a sudden, she’ll take a deep breath, and say, “Really? Tell me more.” So then you tell her more! “I’m a very passionate person, and I love to explore a woman’s body, but only after I connect with her mind and her soul,” and then describe what you’d love to do to her.

What I do is do it very subliminally: “Right now, if you were standing in front of me, I would LOVE to look at you after I kissed you and see how hungry your eyes are. I’ll know just by the look in your eyes how I want to proceed with your body. I’ll know what I want to do next.”

You’re taking control at this point. You’re painting a picture. Most men don’t paint that picture – they paint a picture of weakness. You are basically telling her, “If I was there right now, this is what I would do to you.”

Then, at that point, you have to judge her temperature. You can ask, “Well, do you want to hear more?” 99.9% of the time, she’s going to say of course! At this point, you want to be very subliminal in what you say to her. You want to say things like, “After I’m done kissing you, I would take a look and I know your body would be talking to me, and I know exactly what I would do. I would start at your neck…” and describe it.

“I would start at your neck, because I want to taste your skin in my mouth.” Use very explicit terminology: “I would then take my mouth and kiss every inch of your body, tasting every bit of you, and feeling your energy and the way you react” Use those terms. Not once do you ever say, “I want to spread your legs and lick you like an ice cream cone!” It’s all very subliminal.

At this point, you tell a story. It’s all about how you tell that story . “Man I would just take you, flip you over, and kiss your back from head to toe,” and listen to the way that she is breathing. If she starts breathing a little bit heavier, or sighing a little bit or if she says, “Tell me more” and her voice is getting very breathy, it might even seem like she’s out of breath at this point. She might having short little bursts of breath, and saying, “more, more more…”

More, more, more

Then you can say to her, “Alright, if I was standing there, what would you do to me?” and allow her to describe it now. The thing about sex, and what a lot of men don’t do because they don’t understand how sexual women really are, is give women a chance to express their sexuality. Women are very sexual creatures.

You want to give women a chance to express their sexuality by saying, “Tell me what you would do for me.” Let them tell you and react to it! React positively. When she tells you the things she wants to do, say, “God I love that.” Encourage her a little bit more. A lot of times, her ex-boyfriend or ex-lover didn’t allow her to do those things – she didn’t feel that sexy around him.

The reason why she is exploring this with you over the safety of the phone is that she is trying to figure out who you are. She already has a fantasy about you in her head, so allow her to talk about that fantasy. And every time she says something great, say, “Oh man, that is so hot,” or, “Wow! That would feel so good,” or “I’m yours. You can do that!” And then just add some stuff to it so it becomes this conversation.

Then, at that point, when she is describing things, not only have you turned her on, but she’s turning herself on. You are allowing her to talk about her inner fantasies. At that point, you can say to her, “Let me ask you now, how wet are you?” She will say, “Very.” You then say, “I want you to feel yourself right now, and then describe to me how wet you are. Describe what it feels like in your fingers.”

Her reaction?

Many times she will say, “Oh I’ve been touching myself the whole time!” You ask, “You’ve been touching yourself?” And then you take total control. “Really. I want you to touch yourself some more, and I want to hear you. I want to hear what you’re fantasizing about right now. I want to hear your passion for me. I want to listen. I’m going to talk you through this. I want to listen to what you are burning for right now…” and allow her to talk.

Keep asking her, “What are you doing?” and she’ll tell you what she is doing! Encourage her. “Oh, keep doing that, I want to hear you cum. Cum for me baby, come on.” And then she’ll ask you if you’re touching yourself.

Whether or not you are watching ESPN or touching yourself is your own prerogative, but you say that you are touching yourself. Hopefully you are enjoying the phone sex, and actually having phone sex with her.

This is the way that you get a woman to have phone sex.

Not only that, but once you have phone sex with her, real sex is right around the corner. There is no waiting, no games, no playing, NOTHING. Once they’ve played with you on the phone, they want to play with you in person. You have something to go on.

The next day you text her and say, “Oh man, I’m going to make you beg tonight again. I’m going to make you beg!” and she’ll say, “Oh please don’t make me beg! When are we going to see each other?” And she’s going to beg, because you’ve gotten inside her head.

You have gotten inside her mind, and you’ve gotten inside her soul, like most guys haven’t done.

And that’s how you have great phone sex!

Think Masturbation is Wrong? Here’s The REAL Truth…

Christ Pro Erotic — Sun, 09 Mar 2008 13:18:15 +0000

This is how messed up my understanding of faith and sexuality was as a believer in Jesus. In order to show myself worthy and approved, in order to make sure I can present myself pure before God, self-love was not an option for a believer because it was seen as a sin against God.

Masturbation means I see something (or someone) to cause my loins to stir and thus touch myself; this means I violated the “fornication” code of having sex outside of marriage and violating God’s plan for me.

The message against masturbation

I can’t remember if I became a believer first, masturbated first, or both, but I think after reading some Christian books and hearing teachers from the pulpit come heavy against sexual issues I got the message very clear. If you are to a believer of honor, then you are to keep yourself sexually pure till marriage.

I tried not to touch myself down there. Not to masturbate or think of pleasing myself because it’s evil, of course. My will power (unfortunately) was like one Cosmo Kramer who was the first to loose “the Contest” against Jerry, Elaine, and George on the Seinfield series.

Then again, that could be a good thing.

But is It really wrong?

You see after many tears, many times mentally and spiritually beating myself up, I soon realized maybe masturbation is not a bad thing after all. My human sexuality teacher recommended Betty Dodson’s book “Sex for One.”

Man! Talk about an eye opening theory about the practice; she even had pictures and the whole nine yards.

But the thing that won me over to the “Touch Myself” club was a letter from a Pentecostal woman from Cincinnati, Ohio. She wrote how she felt guilty for years due to the church world she lives in, but because of the book it opened her eyes and mind. Now she knows God won’t shoot her down for touching herself.

“Well if she can do it and find inner peace, why not me?” I thought.

The truth about loving yourself

I realized a few things along the way to enjoy masturbation and keep things in perspective:

Many believers look at Onan as the reason why masturbation shouldn’t be part of a believer or non-believers life. If the passage in Genesis is looked at closely you can see it wasn’t masturbation in the sense of giving pleasure to ones self. God struck down Er because of his wickedness. After that happened, God asked Onan to fulfill the duty of his brother and continue the gene line by lying with his widow Tamar.

In what could be dubbed “the costliest money shot of all time” Onan “spilled his seed” so Er’s family line wouldn’t have an offspring. So Onan lost his life over the betrayal.

Tradition and retribution

Somehow tradition–or the fear of God’s retribution–latched on to this story as a way to keep many men (or women) from masturbation. So please, for the love of truth, stop blaming Onan as the one who messed up masturbation. Blame it all on tradition and for a wrong-headed approach to understanding to what self-love is all about.

The real truth

All the myths about masturbation–blindness, hairy palms, madness, neurotic disorder, etc.—are not true. Next!

We all masturbate throughout our lives. From the time we are babies till we are old and gray, masturbation is one of those things that makes us human. To deny it is both comical and tragic at the same time.

Frequency of self-love ranges from several times a day to every other day to a few weeks to none at all (unless one suffers from obsessive-compulsive disorder). But normally, you are fine if that’s all you do with yourself.

God will not condemn you for having a sexual thought let alone if you are touching yourself over a sexual thought. You might have problems if you are thinking about possessing someone you know doesn’t belong to you.

But if a person turns you on, or an image, or a sexual thought and you just have to express your normal desires you are feeling then enjoy the time with yourself.

Masturbation is good for you!

The health benefits are huge! You can find out what turns you on and causes orgasm to releasing some sexual tension by masturbation. Also, it helps with sexual dysfunction due to the inability to orgasm, prostate health for men, relieves menstrual cramps, eases headaches, causes one to sleep, and promotes well being with the chemicals released during orgasm. Hmm, the benefits outweigh the myths. Did I mention it’s the safest sexual practice of them all?

The last thing about masturbation we need to touch on as Christians is the guilt factor. Again, if you feel you have the freedom to enjoy this practice without any guilt whatsoever weighing on your mind then enjoy.

Too many times believe everything our preachers and teachers say instead of studying for ourselves–with scientific fact and research–whether a practice is beneficial or not.

The information we have today is very accurate as opposed to the myths we discussed earlier. I have come to realize I have more issues about dealing with the things coming from my heart than self-love. Let all the ravers and ranters from the pulpit scream all they want. Masturbation is as good of a time as one person can with themselves.

Not that there’s anything wrong with it.

(Note: Thanks to Betty Dodson for their info and pick up a copy of her landmark book Sex for One: the Joy of Self-Loving)

Ask Dan and Jennifer » masturbation

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