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The Art of Seduction by Conversation: Using ‘The Add-On Principle’ to Get the Girl

Rachael Davis — Sat, 27 Dec 2008 13:48:35 +0000

Persuasion is a universally recognizable component of our society. You see people influencing others everywhere you go: women trying to talk themselves out of speeding tickets, salesmen attempting to convince a potential buyer that a product’s for them, defense attorneys arguing that their client is innocent.

Persuasion is everywhere, used by all of us, all the time.

Somewhere it’s especially noticeable (and vital, if you want to be successful) is in the game of attraction and seduction. For a man to pick-up a girl, that is: find, approach, talk to her and arrange to take it further, he MUST understand and be able to use persuasive psychology.

And it’s that fact many men are surprised by when they hear it–that being successful with women isn’t a God given talent or a roll of the dice; it’s a skill like anything else. Today you’re going to learn a little about that skill.

We’re going to look at a special persuasive psychological technique that, when used, massively increases your chances with the ladies. It’s called ‘The Add-On Principle’.

How The Add-On Principle Works

Picture the scene: You’ve got talking to a girl and been chatting for a little while. You can tell she’s enjoying the conversation and think that she’s quite attracted to you, too. You decide you’d like to make something happen with this girl and see her again real soon but you aren’t sure of the best way to go about making that a reality.

You don’t want to ruin the positive dynamic that you’ve worked so hard to create and you definitely don’t want to scare her off or get rejected. So, what can you do? Well, first of all, what do most guys do when they’re in this situation? I’ll tell you, they take one of three routes:

Route #1: CLICHÉD NUMBER REQUEST

The first route has been taken so many millions of times in the past that it’s nowadays almost an act of parody. It’s asking the girl for her number. Taking this route is, 9 times out of 10, a Plan B at best.

When you ask a girl for her number you not only give her control of the situation (which means she can very easily say no or slip you a phoney number), you also highlight that moment of the conversation as what it really is: an attempt at picking her up. When she realizes this, she’s turned off.

No girl likes the idea of being picked-up because it seems sleazy and dangerous. For a girl to allow herself to be picked up, it must feel natural and unforced.

Route #2: GOING FOR IT

This route’s most often taken at night, in bars, clubs and parties. Namely because the availability of alcohol makes this option seem a good idea.

‘Going for it’ means a guy will try to kiss the girl or cop a feel a little while after talking to her. Perhaps he’ll do it while they dance or as the venue is closing and they’re leaving. Again, it’s a bad idea because it makes the girl feel used and not in control.

Route #3: BOTTLING IT

This option, quite simply, involves choking at the last second, being unable to go through with a ‘closer.’ The conversation’s gone great but the guy just doesn’t feel confident enough to propose meeting up again or something along those lines. As you can imagine, taking this route is a bad idea in regards to being successful with women.

So What Do You Do To Actually Get The Girl?

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How You Can Seduce A Woman Using ‘Deflection Theory’

Tiffany Taylor — Fri, 26 Dec 2008 13:48:32 +0000

There’s something that often happens when you’re out playing the ‘seduction game.’ That is, when you’re actively looking out for girls you think you’d like to hook-up with. Many men have experienced it, and many thousands of men still do experience it when they themselves are out playing the game.

It usually goes something like this: you’re in a group, talking to a couple of girls. You’re with a friend or two, perhaps having drinks in a bar or at a party. You’ve got your eye on one girl in the group in particular and want to make something happen, make a bit of a connection.

Thing is, she’s proving the hardest to connect to. Sure, she smiles and talks to you nicely and politely, but she’s not returning your flirtatious gestures and comments much, if at all. It’s like she’s playing hard to get or something, whereas her female friends seem to be much more playful and flirty.

How To Know If She’s Really Interested In You?

This doesn’t happen because you aren’t her type or just because sometimes these things happen (or don’t). There’s a different, special reason the girl you’re interested in doesn’t appear to be interested in you and it’s got a lot to do with psychology and social standing.

You see, when you show you’re interested in a good-looking girl who’s with her friends, you inadvertently bump up her ego and feeling of self-worth.

She knows you’ve chosen and are most interested in her and likes this feeling of elevated importance. However, she also knows that if she reacts by becoming really flirty and obviously attracted to YOU, she’ll lose the higher social value she has over her friends (probably the reason you targeted her in the first place), so she therefore maintains her unattainable, “I’m a bit too good for you” status.

Use Reverse Psychology to Turn Things Around

However, you can blow this problem out of the water by using DEFLECTION THEORY. You turn the situation on its head and reverse the psychology of your target female by deflecting your attention AWAY from her and ONTO one or more of her friends.

When you show her friends (who have lower social value/worth than your target female) more attention and affection, you challenge her ego. So, in an effort to regain her superiority in the hierarchy of her circle of friends, the girl you’re really interested in will subconsciously invest much MORE interest in you by flirting and being playful.

As so many women do, she gives into wanting what she feels she cannot have and, of course, you’ll be happy to have her. She is, after all, the hottest of the group and the one you wanted in the first place.

How To Deflect Your Attention Onto One Of Her Friends

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How To Approach Groups Of Girls You Don’t Know, And Get Them To Think You’re Great!

Tiffany Taylor — Thu, 11 Dec 2008 19:08:49 +0000

If you’re wondering how to approach girls in a group and get them to think you’re wonderful, keep reading. For this example I’m going to use women at a bar. I will be going into lots of other techniques for non-bar pickups too but for now, we’ll stick with this.

(Note: In fact, I even recommend you try my top places for picking up that are not bars. They are WAAAAAAAY better than ANY bar and you’ll see a massive leap in your success rates with women.)

As you know, women don’t usually go to bars on their own. They go in groups.

Approaching Groups of Women Can Be Scary!

Approaching GROUPS of women can be extremely daunting and if you don’t know what you’re doing, you can fail BADLY with groups and like a pack of wolves they can rip you apart. I’ve seen men get cussed at, totally ignored and even drinks poured over them.

But if you do the approach RIGHT, then your success with a group of women can usually yield great results.

Whenever I suggest approaching groups of women I get LOADS of guys looking at me as though I’m from another planet. I realize that lots of guys probably don’t have the initial confidence to simply walk up to beautiful women they don’t know. Don’t worry, this can be easily solved. I’ll give you some simple tips here.

SIDE NOTE: If you have a major confidence problem then don’t worry, I have an advanced 155-page E-book called HypnoDate which almost exclusively goes into increasing your confidence with women – and it works through the power of self-reprogramming so it doesn’t matter how shy you are, this thing WILL work for you. But guess what – it’s a bonus product that comes with my book at no extra cost.

Increasing Confidence Exercise In The Mall

Step 1. Walk around the shopping mall and when you catch a woman’s eye, smile at her. More often than not, she’ll smile back. To start with you can do this just with shop employees. Even if they don’t WANT to smile, they probably will. Good practice. And you might even brighten a few women’s lives a little.

Step 2. Once you’ve gained confidence in making natural eye contact and a smile with staff, you could move onto other women in the mall. I’m not suggesting big weird freak smiles, just nice, natural friendly ones. A lot of women will smile back at you.

Step 3. Here’s where it might seem a little weird, but this really does help and practice and repetition will make this lots easier. Just say “hi” with a smile to women (and men if you like) as you walk around the mall. It will feel HORRIBLE at first if you are not confident but slowly, after an hour or two, it’ll seem easy.

How Do You Feel Now?

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Picking Up Women: How to Make Easy, Fun Conversation That Leads to Attraction & Sexual Chemistry

Rachael Davis — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 19:05:29 +0000

There are two main ways in which we communicate with others: non-verbal communication and vocal/verbal communication. You probably already know a little about the non-verbal side of things, such as the types of body language that silently signal someone’s nervous, excited or angry.

But how about the more obvious but actually less frequently discussed topic of verbal communication: how what we say and how we say it impacts on our lives and goals? That’s the subject we’re going to look at today.

Except we’re going to a get a little more specific and delve into how a guy can make easy, fun conversation with a woman, that helps lead to attraction and sexual chemistry between the two of you.

Let’s first get a grasp on a few pieces of background information. First off, how do most men make conversation with a woman they’re attracted to? What do they do right, wrong or completely miss out from their talks with the opposite sex?

The best way to answer these questions is simply to identify the mistakes the majority of men out there make; things every guy, for whatever reason, chooses to do when talking to a girl, that hinder, rather than help, his chances of hooking up with her.

Mistake #1: ASKING TOO MANY QUESTIONS.

Lots of men worry that when they start talking to a girl, she won’t say much back. This outcome, standing there, suffering an awkward, embarrassing silence, is so much of a concern that they ask the girl question after question to avoid it.

The reason they bombard her with questions is because they think that the best way of getting and keeping the girl talking is by giving her more and more opportunities to say something, no matter what the topic happens to be.

Unfortunately, doing this sends out a very negative message. It actually shows that you’re nervous and would prefer her to do most of the talking, which often turns the woman off completely.

Mistake #2: NEVER SHUTTING UP.

This is the opposite scenario to the one above, but happens for the same reason. Some men, scared that the girl they’re talking to will up and leave any second, choose to talk endlessly in an effort to keep their attention. Again, this is immediately obvious as a sign of social inexperience and nervousness.

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How To Make Great First Impression On Women

Tiffany Taylor — Fri, 28 Nov 2008 19:00:45 +0000

ALWAYS look your best. I know this sounds REALLY obvious but you’d be surprised by how many men don’t understand the importance of this simple tip.

You never know when the girl of your dreams will turn up, or where. And it’s become a bit of a cliché because it’s true. First impressions really do count.

Here are some figures to consider from my studies.

The Numbers

If you make a GOOD first impression on a woman, you have a 90% chance of EVER getting with her at that point (10% of women for whatever reason will be unreachable for most men at ANY point – she might like women herself etc).

If you make a BAD first impression your chances with her reduce drastically to just 20%. This means that to make her attracted to you AFTER the first 3 minutes of meeting her will be incredibly difficult if her first impressions of you were bad.

It’s the difference between climbing a mountain and using a helicopter to fly up one. Good first impressions means you’re on your way to the top in the helicopter, bad first impressions

Honestly, I can’t stress this enough. Always try to look your best.

Tiff’s 5 S’s of First Impressions

Shave. Shower. Stylish. Smell. Shoes.

Remember these 5 S’s and always take care of them before you go out.

Why are shoes my number 5 S?

Your shoes are the FIRST thing a woman really notices about your clothing and hence your appearance. Make sure your shoes are clean and fashionable.

The Importance of What You Wear

What you wear is very important. I could try to recommend a certain look but as with all things fashionable by the time you read this it may have changed.

Get the latest GQ magazine or other fashionable men’s magazine’s and imitate the styles you see there. Most women don’t really care what labels you are wearing as long as you look good so you don’t have to spend the Earth on clothing.

Many guys I help dress better usually comment on how strange they feel wearing clothes they are uncomfortable in, but nine times out of 10 they start to feel natural and even confident wearing their new wardrobe within days.

The Importance of Scent

Make sure you smell good. Again this is extremely important. Remember how you feel when a woman walks by you and she smells soooo good. You feel an instant attraction even though you don’t know her. Well, that’s how women feel too.

Wear a good-quality cologne, but don’t spray too much.

Don’t Get Carried Away

One squirt on both sides of the neck, and one squirt on both wrists — maximum. You don’t want to smell too overpowering.

I recommend cool water by Davidoff or John Paul Gautier for Men (often called JPG love juice because women love it) if they don’t sell it where you are try to order some from abroad, this stuff is GREAT!

And here’s a GREAT little SECRET that I have found will help you actually pickup about 24% of women without SAYING a word to them! Not a single word! And NO rejection either. You won’t find this anywhere else…

Take just a minute to check out ‘Guy Gets Girl’: “How To Approach Any Woman, Anywhere And Know Exactly What To Say To Get Her To Give You Her Number And Go On A Date With You – NOW”

Attracting and Seducing Women: How to Use ‘Option Limitation’ to Maximize Your Success

Tiffany Taylor — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 15:18:09 +0000

Getting girls to feel an attraction for you, that isn’t simply based on your looks, the contents of your wallet or the car you’ve got parked outside, can be really tricky.

After all, how are men supposed to know what each girl’s looking for without asking?

If you DID ask, you know your chances would be small, after all, no girl wants a guy approaching her with needy questions. She wants a confident man who somehow seems to know what she’s after and can give it to her.

So how do you do it?

How do you become the man that effortlessly exudes confidence, dominance and presence, without turning into an arrogant poser or desperate wannabe?

Exude Confidence

The answer lies in psychology. It’s at the heart of all persuasive social situations, and absolutely central to the success of any guy’s attempts at attracting and seducing women. Quite simply, by learning the CORRECT psychological rules, principles and tactics, any guy can play and WIN at the game of seduction.

For example, let’s look at one such psychological technique, that used correctly boosts any guy’s chance of getting a girl’s number or hooking up with her at a later date by at least 50%, each and every time he uses it. It’s called option limitation and works on the following principle of human nature.

It’s All About the Number of Choices

When someone’s presented with only a single choice, often their natural reaction will be to rebel against it and go their own way. However, when given 2 or 3 options, the opposite occurs: they feel their intellectual freedom has been respected and they make their choice from the variety of options they’ve been presented with.

You can use this universal psychological principle when picking-up or seducing a woman by carefully constructing how you pose important questions or phrases while talking to her.

For example, most men think saying: “Can I have your number?” is an okay way to finish a conversation that’s gone well with a girl. But a much more powerful and effective way of saying the same thing would be to use option limitation.

A Better Close

Something like: “It’s been nice to meet you. Shall we swap numbers or maybe grab a bite to eat and a drink tomorrow?” What you’re doing is presenting the girl with a choice between good and better. Whichever she says yes to, you win.

Don’t Let Her Create Her Own Alternative

If you only give her one option, as in the first example, she’s likely to create her own alternative, which means there’s a chance she won’t say yes to the option you gave her. When she subconsciously recognizes that she’s been given a choice between multiple outcomes, she feels her intellectual freedom has been respected and she chooses one of them.

So, always use option limitation to give the impression there’s a variety of options available to the girl, even though each one is fine as far as you’re concerned. And to strengthen the effect of option limitation, always try to separate the choices you give the girl with the word “or.” When people hear “or” they automatically recognize that they need to make a choice, and therefore do just that.

Option limitation is just one example of how, whether they know it or not, men who are successful with women CREATE that success for themselves – not through luck or good fortune.

Take just a minute to check out ‘Guy Gets Girl’: “How To Approach Any Woman, Anywhere And Know Exactly What To Say To Get Her To Give You Her Number And Go On A Date With You – NOW”

How to Pick Up Girls: The Power of ‘Yes’

Rachael Davis — Tue, 28 Oct 2008 19:34:46 +0000

Everyone, male or female, feels an important need to be consistent in the things they say, do and feel. If we’re flaky and liable to change at the drop of a hat what we believe or have promised, we know that people are likely to judge and mistrust us.

This commonly felt sense of importance regarding the need to be consistent within ourselves can be exploited when attempting to seduce a woman. One seduction technique that makes use of this concept is called ‘The Power of Yes’.

The Power of Yes

Here’s a common scenario most men have experienced at some point or another in their lives. You find yourself talking to a girl, maybe you approached her and consciously started a conversion, or perhaps the chat began unplanned, naturally. Either way, you’re enjoying each other’s company.

After a while, it dawns on you that you and the girl you’re talking to are going to have to go your separate ways pretty soon, which poses a slight dilemma: how can you make it so this isn’t the first and last time you two are together and instead arrange for it to progress into something further? The obvious route to take is to perform a ‘closer’.

A closer is when you make a conscious effort to get a girl’s number, swap both your numbers, arrange to meet up again soon, or otherwise cross that social “getting to know you” line. Thing is, you don’t want your closer to crash and burn, you want the girl to happily agree to whatever it is you suggest.

How Can You Ensure You Close?

So how can help ensure that happens? You use psychology, specifically, ‘The Power of Yes’ technique. The technique involves getting the girl you’re interacting with to give several positive ‘yes’ responses to your questions in quick succession.

Doing so helps develop an internal sense of positivity in the female that carries over in her mind to when you perform the actual closer and tips the balance in the direction of agreement to your request or suggestion.

Be Subtle and Casual

You can do this by using subtle and casual responses after she says things, like: “Really?” and “Do you?” Match your response to what she’s just said and ensure it takes the form of a question that you’re sure will prompt a ‘yes’ response from her. Getting between 3 and 6 of these positive responses is usually enough to allow the principle to work.

Avoid Negative Responses

At the same time, avoid asking questions or saying things near the end of your conversation, just before you’re about to close, that could possibly evoke negative reactions or “no” responses from the female.

The reason this technique works so well is because of the natural human phenomenon mentioned at the start of this article; people feel it’s important to be consistent and congruent in the things they say and the situation they’re in.

After responding to you positively half a dozen times, a natural inclination is created in the female’s mind for saying ‘yes.’ She’s gotten used to it. When you finally suggest going for a bite to eat tomorrow or visiting that museum together you told her about, the most natural and consistent response in her mind is a responding “Yes!”…it just feels right.

Guys: Body Language Basics For Seducing Women

Tiffany Taylor — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 13:18:14 +0000

Body language is VERY important. According to studies carried out over 50% of your communication comes from your body language, what you DON’T say, and less then 8% of your communication comes from what you DO say.

What does this mean to you?

It is MORE important to pay careful attention to HOW you say things, and HOW you stand and HOW you act than it is to WHAT you say (at least initially).

You see, you could have the BEST game in the world and be able to really get any woman to like you loads, for example online, but if you used those same successful techniques in the real world and lacked obvious confidence, lacked eye contact etc. You would simply CRASH and BURN!

Honestly, body language is SOOOO important in attracting women. Later in the course we’ll go into how you can use the female’s body language to READ her mind and know what she’s thinking. This article is about YOUR body language.

Ok… So, I’ll cover the basics as the advanced stuff is beyond the scope of this article.

Body language basics:

1. Smile

You have to make the female feel at ease and comfortable that you are a friendly and fun guy and you are not a psycho as quick as possible. Especially when talking to her for the first time. You also need to let her know that you are confident and comfortable around women.

A big and genuine smile is the best way to do this. It works. In fact, if you ever get an Ice Queen that you can tell is about to give you the “dead eye”, give her a big smile. Practice smiling at random people. You’ll be surprised by how many people smile back and at how many doors open to you. Smiling WORKS. Just don’t make it a cheesy, fake smile

2. Eye contact

As you know there’s nothing worse than staring at a woman’s chest or even looking. It makes you just like all the other guys who drool over her. If anything you should use all your skill to NOT look at her chest – she’ll wonder why her womanly powers don’t work with you and she’ll seek your attention and subconsciously TRY to get you to look!

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The Art Of Approaching Women Anywhere Without Fear Of Rejection…

Tiffany Taylor — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 19:12:15 +0000

For a man, one of the most daunting prospects he can contemplate is that of walking up to a woman he doesn’t know, saying hi, then flirting with her. It sounds like such a simple procedure, but the truth of the matter is anything but simple.

For most men, approaching women is a tough task with very little room for mistakes or mess-ups. That is one of the reasons they fear the approach so much, because they do not want to fail.

So, what are the other reasons men hate approaching and talking to women and, more importantly, how can a guy successfully approach a woman and start talking to her without any fear of rejection or gut-wrenching feelings of nervousness?

Reasons Men Fear Approaching Women

They are scared of being rejected by the woman
They feel inadequate. They’re too fat, too thin, too short, too pale, too something.
They feel they lack the social skills needed to succeed. They don’t know what they’d talk about, how to make jokes, etc.
They are scared of looking like a desperate guy who is hitting on women
They are worried that other men will see what they are doing and socially punish them as a result

Fear of Rejection

So, first things first, why do men fear being rejected by women? If they don’t know the women they’re approaching, why should their opinions matter? Well, we all know that just because we don’t know somebody doesn’t mean we don’t care about what they think of us.

But the real reason men fear rejection is because the fear of rejection has been evolutionarily programmed into their brains. Like all other fears, it acts as a security device, which tries to prevent us from coming to any harm.

Hundreds of thousands of years ago, our ancestors lived in much smaller communities. Messing up with a woman in such a small tribe could easily destroy your chances of having kids. It’s really no wonder men still experience that pang of anxiety just before they walk up to an attractive woman with the intention, or hope, of talking to her.

Then come feelings of inadequacy. You could say that it’s because of feelings of inadequacy that men fear rejection. One leads to the other. Every man and woman has their own unique collection of personal inadequacies.

Regardless of what yours are, you’ll know what it feels like to think that they’re way too bad for any woman to look past them. Clearly this makes meeting a new woman very difficult.

Feelings of Inadequacy

The next reason on the above list follows on from the last two. First a man feels inadequate for some reason, then he fears being rejected and then, as a result of that, he avoids approaching new women and talking to them as much as possible.

This, of course, does nothing for his ability to successfully talk to, flirt with, and attract women. He avoids doing it and so avoids getting good at it.

The last two reasons are pretty self-explanatory. Because the guy feels inadequate and therefore inept at talking to women, he worries women will instantly identify him as a needy loser who wants to hit on and score with them. Clearly this is something he does not want to be seen as.

So! The big question is how can a guy approach women without feeling inadequate, without fearing rejection and without looking like a needy loser? Here are the general guidelines…

How to Seduce a Woman by Using Visualization Techniques

W. Wilcox — Tue, 21 Oct 2008 13:07:18 +0000

The human mind is a powerful thing. And although its complexity and intricacy currently stretches well beyond our comprehension, we DO still have a solid grasp of what it’s capable of. It’s the driving force for inventors, philosophers, scientists and specialists all over the world. Some of our brain’s uses, however, are less well known and more infrequently used than others.

Take, for example, visualization techniques.

Visualization techniques are most commonly associated with people who are striving to achieve success in areas of physical excellence: athletes, body builders, endurance specialists, explorers and martial artists all employ the power of visualization to help them achieve their goals. But what is it exactly?

A common misconception is that visualization is the act of imagining something to help yourself achieve an end goal. This explanation, although not a million miles away from the truth, doesn’t accurately represent the true concept of visualization. Visualization involves truly envisioning two things in your head, with as much clarity and detail as possible. First is the act itself.

For example, leaping from the starting blocks at the crack of the gun, your muscles tightening, your body springing into action, each stride long and powerful driving you forward with super speed and swiftness. Second is the outcome: such as the winning of the race.

You picture yourself being the first to cross that white line, decelerating to the sound of a roaring crowd. Flash bulbs explode and while your chest heaves for air, you smile in the comfort of knowing you succeeded and came first.

The result of visualizing both of these concepts is a powerful one. Your mind and body become more prepared and more capable because you’ve already practiced and gone through the motions of what is to come. Your attitude is more positive and productive and you gain the edge you need to truly succeed.

Visualization can be used in a variety of fields to help you succeed, even in attracting and seducing women. The same principle above applies, you must truly act out in your mind both the act of meeting a girl and the outcome of whatever it is you’re looking for (be it sex, a relationship, or whatever.) Here’s a few pointers to help you do this:

1. Visualize Every Detail

Make a real effort to visualize each and every detail of what you want to happen during the act of meeting and talking to a woman. See yourself smiling and saying hi to a girl in a bookstore and her replying with a shy smile and glint in her eye.

Picture laughing and joking and being flirtatious. Even envisage small details, like you both taking a sip of your drink at the same time. Each and every visualized moment prepares your conscious and subliminal mind for actual real-life encounters. The more you visualize and the greater detail in which you do it, the more capable and prepared you become.

2. See The Ending Too

Once you’ve visualized the act of meeting and conversing with a girl, foresee leaving the bookstore or bar and going back to your/her place. Whatever outcome is preferable to you, picture it. See the colors, hear the sounds, feel the textures and smell the aromas.

3. Use Visualization Everywhere

Use visualization when you’re at home AND when you’re out looking for girls that catch your attention. Doing both ensures your mind is programmed in the most prepared, positive state possible: nerves disappear and confidence grows.

For more great visualization and confidence techniques, check out HypnoDate – a revolutionary manual that teaches men how to use special hypnotic principles to become masters of attraction and seduction, without the need for good looks, money or a flashy car. Check it out now at the HypnoDate website.

How to Develop Confidence With Women in 4 Easy Steps

Tiffany Taylor — Sun, 19 Oct 2008 19:22:38 +0000

You could say that confidence is the absence of self-doubt. When you doubt yourself, you tend to become less capable of succeeding at the thing you doubt you can succeed at. That might sound like a bit of a word puzzle, but it makes sense when you think about it.

Being unsure about something doesn’t mean you can’t do it, it just means that you don’t feel comfortable or calm about the idea of doing it. And, of course, when self-doubt creeps into your head, it’s bound to have a debilitating effect on your behavior.

Nowhere is this fact more evident than in the dating game. When a man doesn’t feel completely confident while talking to a woman, his chances of attracting her are drastically reduced, because his ability to appear attractive has been diminished.

The answer to this dilemma, predictably enough, is increasing the man’s confidence when talking to women by decreasing his feelings of self-doubt, anxiousness and nervousness. Let’s now look at how this can be done.

The process of increasing your confidence, and therefore your attractiveness, when talking to attractive women, can be broken down into four main steps.

Step #1: Understanding Women

This step could take a lifetime, but it really doesn’t have to if you take a simple, straight-forward approach to completing it.

First you need to avoid falling into the trap of thinking that women are like a different species to men, with completely different ideas, beliefs, needs and modes of behavior.

It’s true that women look for different things than men when dating, but their desires aren’t so different that they should be considered mysterious or unintelligible to men. They want to be made to feel:

- Good about themselves

- Happy

- Sexually attractive

- Valued

- Respected

- Admired

Men want to be made to feel these things too by the women they date. The difference is what it takes to make men and women feel these things. There are different routes towards the same goals, depending on whether the person in question is male or female.

So, to increase your confidence with women, you need to remember that although they are different to men, they still want the same fundamental things from men that men want from women. They just want them in slightly different quantities and, to get them, a slightly different route needs to be followed.

DO NOT let people tell you that women are mysterious. They are not. You just need to know what they want and how to give it to them. The same goes for men, from a female perspective.

Step #2: Become Skilled at Having Good Conversations

Before you even consider talking to a woman and attracting her, you need to become good at talking period. You need to become a skilled conversationalist, in other words. You need to be the guy that people talk to and, after the conversation, think, “That was awesome. I really had a good time talking to him.”

You achieve this by learning to develop the most important skill a good conversationalist can possess: emotion management. It’s all about how you make the person you’re talking to feel. What they think about you is governed by how you make them feel about themselves. But we’re not talking about giving them a motivational speech.

What you need to get good at is having a relaxed conversation in which the person you’re talking to respects you (because they see you as being of high social value, confident, etc.). Then you need to engage them, by hearing what they are saying, replying thoughtfully to it and offering your own input in the right way.

And then, most importantly, you need to inject energy and emotion into the interaction by laughing, smiling and generally expressing the right emotions at the right times.

So, make a conscious effort to become good at talking to people. Your conversations should be fun, interesting and addictive. You want people to really enjoy talking to you, then and only then can you expect attractive women to enjoy a conversation with you.

Step #3: Start Making Approaches

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How To Meet Women? Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone!

Brad Howard — Mon, 25 Aug 2008 13:35:13 +0000

Are you finding it to be tough to get started in a new venture? Are you working out enough or have you put it off completely?

Are you afraid to walk up to a beautiful woman and start a conversation with her because you’re afraid of being rejected?

Are you alone?

As I’ve discussed time and time again, the mind only truly reacts to either intense pleasure or intense pain. Feeling one of these two emotions will get you to make a change in your life instantly.

Are you in a comfort zone?

Think about it. Are you in a "comfort zone"?

Have you thought about making some changes but life is too comfortable right now?

Are you one of those people that would rather look back and say, "I KNOW I could have done it… but I just didn’t…"?

I see this phenomenon in many instances but the most prevalent revolve around relationships and personal growth. How many people do you know that are in stale relationships but won’t move on because of the comfort level? How many have talked about new business ventures or making more money only to stave off because of the comfortable life they have at the moment.

Remember, growth only occurs when our mental boundaries expand.

Get uncomfortable!

If something you haven’t done makes you a little uncomfortable (not scares the heck out of you), just think about the positive impact on life the new thing brings to you. Try to push yourself each day.

Try to conquer, yes conquer, something new everyday.

Visualize it!

The easiest way to accomplish this is through visualization (and that’s a whole other article in itself)

What are some of your personal hot buttons? What is the worst thing that could possibly happen to you?

Let’s suppose that being “a loser” is high on your totem pole of worst possible things. If you want to lose weight, just say to yourself when you need an extra push, “Only LOSERS are overweight. I am not a loser; therefore, I’ll go to the gym today.”

Or… "Only LOSERS are afraid of talking to women… I’m not a loser; therefore, I’m gonna go talk to her."

Of course, this represents a generic example. Other examples could be instances where you’ve seen something very disturbing (like a ruined heart on TV). You can then use that to “influence” you. You obviously don’t want your heart to look like that, do you?

Using positive experiences

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The Attraction of Confidence – Why Women Are Attracted To Confident Men

Matt Savage — Thu, 17 Jul 2008 13:36:52 +0000

You’re standing in a bar. Across from you is a beautiful woman.

You make eye contact and smile. She smiles back and decides to come over. She gets closer and closer.

You suddenly get a tight little knot in your stomach; anxiety from not knowing what will come next. Now she is standing in front of you. Your heart is racing.

You barely manage to get out the words, "Uhhhh Hi." She says "hi" back with a look of intrigue. As she begins to speak, you begin to doubt.

You wonder what she’s thinking. How could this beautiful woman possibly be interested in me?

After a brief moment of small talk, the woman walks away. You begin to wonder, what the hell just happened?

You can’t help but feel rejected. You obsess over what could possibly be wrong with you. The next thing you know, several hours have gone by and you’re a big pile of anxiety.

What turned her off?

So what repelled this woman? It could have been any number of things. Was it your breath? Your insecure body language? Your shortened height? Your hideous disfigured face? The thing is, you will never know what drove this woman away. This is the unknown variable of attraction.

Variables of attraction

There are many variables in a person that determines whether they are attractive or not. There have been volumes written about the science of attraction. Even many of today’s top dating gurus are constantly seeking ways to decipher the process of attraction. However, with centuries of research and much discussion, there always seems to be one thing, one variable, that consistently makes a person attractive – confidence.

To be free from doubt; to have belief in yourself and your abilities. This is confidence.

Why confidence matters

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How To Know If She’s Straight (and interested in you…), Bisexual, or Lesbian? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 08 Jul 2008 14:22:35 +0000

When you’re in a club, or another place where lots of people get together to hang out and possibly meet dates, you can sometimes find yourself overwhelmed.

If you’re there looking for a date, it can sometimes be hard to figure out if a girl likes you, or is even interested in you. For all you know, she could be gay or bisexual.

If you’re at a strip club, it can be even harder to figure out if the stripper herself is interested in going out with you or not. How can you tell?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I’m very good when it comes to knowing someone’s strengths and weakness, at work, playing sports, habits, tendencies and what not. But when it comes to meeting women it’s a different story. Like if I went to club.

How do I know which women are straight, bisexual, lesbian? What are some of the signs?

Women walking around in a club and you see them pass by several times, is it their way of checking you out?

And what are your thoughts on dating strippers? Is there away I can incorporate scouting into meeting women?

- Brian, Okla.

Wait! Give this Video 5 Stars and Subscribe Today so you don’t miss a single video.

Getting To Know A Girl’s Body Language

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Men, Does More Muscle Really Equal More Sex?

Brad Howard — Wed, 30 Apr 2008 14:08:28 +0000

On average women find muscular men more sexually attractive.

This may seem a little obvious, but it IS scientifically proven by research. Not only that, but time and time again, social psychology research shows us that women will choose more muscular men for short term sexual partners, and have sex with them faster without a long dating period, than their non muscular counterparts.

Women will also have sex with these “types” of men without developing an emotional attraction to them first as well.

Research shows women prefer muscular men

In fact, a study published in 2007, by Frederick et al. photographed men and had random women judge the look of the muscularity and fatness of their bodies. What the researchers discovered was not only that the men who were judged to be more muscular with less body fat were deemed more attractive, but also that these same “musculed” men had more sexual partners on average than their non “musculed” rivals.

This may seem unbelievably obvious to you, but for some reason there is a notion that your “look” and the condition of your body don’t play a role in attracting women.

Despite this idea, this research is proof that the way your body looks absolutely makes a difference in the amount of sex you will have, and the amount of different, high quality women that you can have sex with.

In other words, the study shows that guys with the right ‘type’ of muscularity can have sex with more women, more often, and have more short term partners than less physically attractive men of the same age and social status (more muscle = more flings).

Point blank, if she’s looking for a hair raising blast in a sports car, and you look like a practical safe station wagon, then it doesn’t matter what you say or do, the chips may be stacked against you more than you know.

What else will you attract?

As an aside, the research by Frederick et al also shows that guys with the right muscular build ALSO have sex with more women that are currently in relationships with other men.

That’s right, according to the research, if you’ve got the right look, even married, engaged, or otherwise ‘attached’ women still want a piece of you, and many are perfectly fine with ‘cheating’ on their significant other to have a taste of what you’ve got to offer.

This effect is all dependent on having the right “ type” of muscular body. As the Frederick research also illustrated, a bodybuilder style build was not as attractive as a male body with properly proportioned muscles.

Luckily, getting the proper proportions is simply a matter of applying the number one physical attraction metric for men–The Adonis Index. With a top flight male transformation program like the Adonis Effect (which is designed to build your body into its most ideal attractive shape) while introducing a wee bit of dedication on your part in order to see astounding results.

So what are you waiting for? Lets get to the gym, and start building the body our women really want!

Getting the proper proportions is simply a matter of applying the number one physical attraction metric for men… The Adonis Index. To find out how to use the Adonis Index to generate subconscious physical attraction, visit the Adonis Effect website.

How To Be Every Woman’s ‘Type’

Brad Howard — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 14:13:07 +0000

Guys might say they have ‘types’, like blondes, or short and petite, or like women with blue eyes, or brunettes, whatever.

But I’d guess that most of you never refer to your “type” as being “excessively overweight” or “big boned with a great personality.”

Yet, this is in fact what guys settle for when they think they have no shot at something better looking.

What women really want

Likewise, 99% of all women prefer a guy with a great body – regardless of hair and eye color, or how tall or short he is. There is no such thing as an attractive women who “prefers” a guy with a big sloppy gut, or a hot woman who would really like a guy with a weak sunken chest, no muscle in his arms and skinny twigs for legs.

Rest assured these body looks are not any woman’s “type”, they are just what women settle for when they realize they can’t get their hands on a better looking guy.

Now, of course you might say that rock stars or big time Hollywood celebrities get great looking women without being in any kind of shape, and I’ll agree to an extent, but if you’ll notice most of these guys are in pretty good shape too!

The research on body shape and attraction

There is current research that shows on average:

Women with great bodies have sex with guys that have great bodies.
Women with a few extra pounds tend to end up with guys with a few extra pounds.
And women who are really big, well you can fill the blank in here.

In other words, more often than not you’re going to end up in bed with a girl who’s body is only as good as yours.

In fact, studies show that it’s rare for a guy who is completely out of shape to constantly be having sex with women that have the hottest of hot bodies.It’s much more likely that the women available to you have a body that rates about the same as yours does.

So how do I get a great body?

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How Much Of A Man Are You? Your Adonis Index Defined

Brad Howard — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 15:06:32 +0000

On your top 10 list of things that you find attractive in a woman, I’ll bet facial beauty and a nice body account for 9 of the top 10 spots…and in many cases all 10.

In fact, the vast majority of men… and that’s me included… will probably give a bit on the face if the woman has a rockin’ body.

Yet, in this same regard, how much will you compromise if the woman has the prettiest face you’ve ever seen… but she’s carrying 10, maybe 15lbs over your ideal?

Exactly.

I don’t care how pretty a woman’s face is, if it’s attached to a body more suited for a walrus, that woman is not on your radar, or any other guy that you or I know. This is the girl with the “great personality” that just so happens to be the proverbial “grenade” every night she goes out.

“Personality” never gets a woman too far if she doesn’t have the looks and the body and quite frankly, the research proves it.

So, why do you think that would be any different for guys?

There ARE differences when it comes to attraction

Well, truth be known… there ARE some differences… but they are more subtle than most guys realize.

Attracting women, and especially a hot woman with a great body requires you to know what to say, when to say it, how to move and how to act… but studies also show that being in shape helps much more than most people are giving credit for.

You can believe it or not… but the fact is… if you’re in the throws of passion with a beautiful woman and your body is built like a Greek god… she won’t be able to keep her hands off of you… period.

The truth about the way your body looks

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5 Tips For Meeting Women That Every Man Ought To Know

Joseph Matthews — Sat, 01 Mar 2008 14:35:37 +0000

Finally! A step-by-step guide on how to meet women that makes meeting women fun and easy for any guy! I have a question…

(And you have to be honest with me here!)

Is meeting women hard for you to do? Do you feel afraid when it comes to meeting women?

And is that fear keeping you from succeeding and keeping you lonely and alone?

If so, don’t worry. I’m going to give you some incredible bits of advice you can use that will help you meet great women, and help you to take control of your love life and overcome your fear!

It’s not all about instinct

Meeting women should be a piece of cake. After all, that’s what you’re biologically programmed for, right? Nope!

Despite what you might think and what others may tell you, the fact is that us men are not born already knowing how to naturally meet and attract women. (Believe me, I wish that WAS the case, but its not, unfortunately.)

Knowing how to meet women is something you LEARN, not something you’re "born with." Just like any skill, you have to LEARN how to meet and talk to women, just like you have to learn to speak Spanish, play the guitar, and recite your A-B-C’s.

It’s a SKILL. And skills are learned, not instinctual.

No worries…help is on the way!

So if you currently don’t know how to meet women, don’t worry, there is NOTHING wrong with you! You just haven’t learned enough to make meeting women something that’s comfortable and easy yet.

Sadly, there are tons and tons of men out there who are too afraid to meet women, and because of that they stay home alone over the weekend when they should be out meeting girls.

And even worse – most of these guys will never do anything to overcome this fear.

This is due to the fact that these men don’t realize just how much their lives are controlled by this fear! And they justify this fear of going out and meeting women by thinking of all the things that could go wrong.

Some guys have such a dim view of themselves as attractive men that they think a girl they’re interested in is going to laugh at them, or dismiss them, or tell them off. Maybe she’ll throw her drink in their face, or maybe they’ll get beaten up by her boyfriend!

Never think the worst

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How to Meet Women in Book Stores

Joseph Matthews — Sun, 24 Feb 2008 14:22:53 +0000

There are all sorts of clichés about men picking up women in book stores but, believe it or not, it is something that can actually happen.

Of course, meeting a woman and getting from that initial “hello” to the exchange of phone numbers and plans for a meal can be a little bit tricky. You don’t want to rush things, but you don’t want to let her get away, either.

Here are a few tips on how to meet women in book stores.

#1. Visit a large bookstore.

A mall bookstore or a small store might be right on your way somewhere, but it generally isn’t a good place to meet women. Small bookstores are cramped, usually over flowing with product and the sales people are tripping over you every couple of minutes as they offer customer service to the other customers.

If the store is busy, you can forget about even being able to approach the woman who caught your eye. Too many people will manage to get in your way and by the time you get to where she was standing, she will have moved on to a new location.

Instead opt for browsing at one of the larger bookstores like Barnes and Nobles or Borders. These stores are famous for their wide aisles, their comfortable chairs and their coffee shops.

#2. Stick to what you know

Don’t try to impress women who are reading books from sections that you normally wouldn’t set foot in. If you are into anime and she is reading the newest tome from Dr. Phil, you might not have much luck in finding a good conversation starter. If you look in the sections that you normally shop in, you have a built in way to start a conversation.

You can either mention what you’ve thought about the book she’s looking at or ask her if she might be able to recommend something since you can see that she reads the same books you do.

Obviously you could do this in another section as well, but it is risky—especially if she asks you what other books in that section you have read.

#3. Approach a wanderer

It is better to approach someone who is wandering around and looking at the shelves than it is to approach someone who is already sitting down and reading through a book. If she looks like she is very into what she is reading, it is best to leave her alone.

You don’t want to start the relationship by annoying her in the middle of a good book, do you? Plus, if you talk to a woman who is already browsing, you have the built in conversation starters discussed in #2. Of course, if stops reading to look at you, you can assume that it is okay to approach her.

#4. Take the conversation somewhere else

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How to Meet Women in Coffee Shops

Joseph Matthews — Sat, 16 Feb 2008 14:30:25 +0000

Going to get coffee is almost as much of a staple of human behavior as going to the grocery store. With a Starbucks on almost every corner (and an independent coffee shop on the corners not occupied by Starbucks), coffee beverages are everywhere.

Gone are the days when people would ask “what’s a cappuccino” These days people argue over what ingredients are supposed to be in a Macchiato and which ingredients are not.

Since you probably spend a good portion of your day waiting in line at your local coffee shop, you have probably spent some time thinking about whether or not it is a place in which you can meet women. Here is the good news: It is possible to meet women in coffee shops!

It is even possible to meet women in coffee shops and get them to meet you again—in someplace that doesn’t smell like Sumatra. Here are some tips to help you meet women in coffee shops.

Be Gracious

If she is having trouble deciding what to order from the menu and turns to apologize, always be gracious. She is probably feeling very embarrassed. If she is truly sorry you can offer to help her decide what to order. Sentences like “I come here all the time, what were you thinking of ordering? I can tell you if it’s good or not,” are good openers.

This can work in the opposite situation. If you can’t make up your mind, you can ask the woman behind you what kind of coffee drinks she likes and then you have the bonus option of buying her coffee “to make up for taking so long to decide.

Be Cautious

If she is alone and reading or writing in a journal, approach with caution. People like to do these things without being interrupted, even if they are in the middle of a busy and noisy coffee shop. This rule can be voided if there aren’t any empty tables to claim for yourself.

If she looks up from her book a lot, a good way to meet her is to ask what she is reading and what she thinks of it. Be honest when she asks if you have read it or have read other books like it. Lying about what you read will come back and bite you later.

Be Polite

When you are standing next to a woman at the sugar stand, you can ask her to pass you something—you can easily play it off as being polite—you didn’t want to get in her way. Politeness goes a long way with women. The same is true for if she is reaching for something closer to your side of the stand. Grab it for her with a simple “here you go.” And the conversation can go from there.

Be Bold

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