In A Barn Loft Full Of Hay

While the hay might be coarse and itchy (heads up, bring a blanket), this can definitely be a romantic and sexy way to connect with your inner “redneck.” The smell of the hay will help you get in touch with your country side, and you and your lover can have fun bringing the term “rolling around in the hay” to life.

On The Fence In The Middle Of A Farm

One of the best things about being on a farm is that you’re really out in the middle of nowhere. There’s almost never anyone around, so you can have nearly complete privacy while still being out in the open and experiencing the thrill of “public sex.” Hop up on a picket fence and get busy! Make sure to avoid having sex on electric cattle fences – they’re pretty easy to spot, but if you do mistake an electric fence for a regular fence, your bum is going to be sorry!

Grab A Quickie At The County Fair

The county fair is a great place to grab a quickie. There are plenty of places to do it, and almost no one is paying attention – they’re too busy playing carnival games or people watching. Next time the fair is in town, find a secluded nook and get it on with your lover. Standing sex positions are probably your best bet here, there’s no telling what is on the ground – it could be anything from petting zoo waste to sticky popcorn and cotton candy.

On A Hunting Platform In A Tree

Find a much better use for a hunting platform and use it for sex instead of shooting wild animals. This can be super fun if you’re not afraid of heights – just be careful and make sure that the platform you’ve chosen is sturdy enough to support both yours and your partner’s weight combined. Don’t go at it too vigorously though – shaking the entire tree might not be in your best interest.

At A Public Laundromat

There are few things more raunchy than having sex in a public laundromat. If you happen to go when it’s either really early or really late (never on the weekends, laundromats are always super busy on Saturdays and Sundays), you will often find yourselves alone for quite some time. Take advantage of the privacy and bend over a commercial washer doggy style!

In A Car Lift At The Auto Shop

When your car is being worked on, sneak into the backseat and have sex while your car is lifted up in the air. The bonus? No one will be able to hear you and your lover getting it on over the noise of the machinery in the shop. The caveat? It’s going to be pretty tough sneaking in the backseat without anyone from the shop noticing you. Even if you manage to get up there without anyone being the wiser, you’re probably not going to be able to get out without someone seeing you.

On A Blanket In The Middle Of A Pasture

This one is actually very easy to do and you probably won’t get caught doing it. Find an empty pasture and bring a blanket – and a picnic if you like – and relax under the open air. Do this at sunrise, sunset or at night under the stars. It’s simple, fun and super romantic! Just be sure to avoid the cow paddies.

Under The Bleachers At A Monster Truck Rally

If the idea of monster trucks crushing each other and the sound of twisting metal turns you on (what redneck doesn’t like monster trucks?), grab two tickets to a monster truck rally and get busy under the bleachers. No one will be able to hear you over all the noise, so be as loud as you like!

In The Back Corner Of The Dollar Store

This may be difficult to do without getting caught, but it is possible. Next time you’re bargain hunting at the dollar store, sneak to a back corner or aisle that isn’t frequented by customers or staff. If you can’t manage to have sex, start a little foreplay like a handjob or deep kissing that can be continued at home.

On The Sofa At A Truck Stop Lounge

This is probably the raunchiest, most redneck spot of them all. If it’s late at night, it’s unlikely that anyone will notice or be bothered by you and your lover getting busy on the couch – just make sure to bring a blanket. You don’t know what – or who – else has been on that couch!

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On A Hospital Elevator

Having sex in a hospital elevator can definitely lift a somber mood, and it’s even better when you’re at the hospital for something happy like the birth of a baby. Heck, why not practice making a baby right then and there? Press the stop button (make sure there’s not an alarm on it) and go at it. And you definitely want to press the stop button – hospital elevators are well known for stopping at almost every floor to let doctors and nurses off and on. Also, watch where you’re going! The elevator may very well take you into the morgue.

The Exam Table At The Doctor’s Office

Forget reading magazines or organizing your to-do list on your phone while you wait for the doctor to come in and examine you. Instead, hop up on the exam table and grab a quickie! It can make the wait less boring, but you do stand a chance of getting caught. Also, you may very well leave evidence – like semen – behind for the nurses to find when they flip the room for the next patient. You don’t want that noted in your chart!

In Your Neighbor’s Pool

Sex in the water is super fun, and it can feel extra naughty when you get busy in your neighbor’s pool while they’re gone. If you like the idea of possibly getting caught, plan to do it when they’ve gone off to the store or are just running errands. If you definitely don’t want to get caught (and if you want to turn your quickie into something more leisurely), choose a time that they’re on vacation or staying somewhere for a day or two and you know they won’t be back for quite some time.

Your Parent’s Bedroom

Bring back the feelings you had when you were a teenager and were trying to get some on the fly before your parents caught you by having sex in their bedroom. As an adult, you know you’re not going to get in trouble like you did when you were a kid, but getting caught can still be kind of embarrassing. For those who want a quickie but don’t want to risk the parents busting in, do it in their vacation house or while they’re not home.

On The Bathroom Floor (Yours Or Someone Else’s)

The bathroom floor is a great place for a quick romp, because it will make you feel sexy, dirty and a little raunchy! Even more so if you’re doing it in a public bathroom or at a friend’s house. Make sure the bathroom is clean though – either lay down a blanket of some kind or use standing sex positions.

In An Empty Bedroom Or Closet At A Friend’s Party

If you’re at a party and are feeling a little tipsy, your inhibitions are definitely down. It’s a perfect time to take advantage of your need to feel a little risque, so grab your partner and head to an empty bedroom or closet at a friend’s party. If it’s a wild party, you can pretty much guarantee that there are other people all over the house doing the exact same thing – just don’t be surprised if you walk in on another couple getting busy when you’re looking for a place to go yourself!

Doggy Style Looking Out Over An Observation Deck

Sometimes, you need a quickie with a view. If you live near a mountain or lake with some kind of observation deck, it can be an incredible place to get down on all fours and do it doggy style. The reason for doggy style sex here? So you can both take in the surroundings!

In The Empty Moving Van Before Returning It On Moving Day

You’ve finished moving, and you and your partner are completely exhausted – and exhilarated. You’re both covered in sweat and looking mighty fine – so why not throw down a blanket in the empty moving van and get busy? Sex or oral sex is great here – just leave the door cracked open so you can get out! You definitely don’t want to get locked in a moving van. Someone will eventually find you, but what are they going to think when they open the door and find you and your partner alone with nothing else in there?

In A Tanning Bed

Having sex in a tanning bed can be great fun, but there’s a few things to watch out for. Make sure that you and your partner’s combined weight don’t exceed the weight limit of the tanning bed. You don’t want to get busted by breaking the bed, and you’ll most likely be financially responsible for the damage. Also, limit it to a quickie, because you’ll end up with some funky tan lines if you stay in there longer than just a few minutes!

The Stairwell Of An Apartment Building

This is probably one of the best places to get busy on the fly. It has everything you need – good seating, handrails if you get really wild (or want to play with a little bondage), and privacy. Most people take the elevator in apartments, so if you sneak into the stairwell, you’re unlikely to get caught. It’s even less likely you’ll get caught if you pick a time where most everyone is in bed.

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Adding a little sexual activity to your flight might seem like an ideal way to pass the time, but convincing your lady it’s a good idea might be the first, and most difficult, challenge to overcome on your way to joining the popular ‘Mile High Club’.

How can you convince her that having sex on an airplane will be fun, exciting, and worth the risk (yes, it IS illegal to have sex in an airplane so do proceed at your own risk!) and possible discomfort?

Convincing your woman to have sex on an airplane is as simple as addressing her concerns, promising to deliver and knowing the limitations. Let’s look at each of these in detail.

What To Do Before You Board The Plane

If your woman is closed off to the idea of having sex on a plane, be sure you understand her concerns. If you can, start before you even board the plane. Tell her that you’re goal is simply to “spice up” your sex lives and that you have no underlying wish to end up in jail.

You already know her threshold for adventure. If she’s pretty adventurous, you already have an “in”. If she’s not, ask her what her concerns are. Let’s look at some common concerns, and what to do about it:

Concern #1: She’s Afraid Of Getting Caught

She’s afraid you’ll be found out. Tell her that airplane sex is common. It happens more than you realize. In fact, it might have happened near her on a flight. She just didn’t know. Besides, there are many things you can do to prevent being caught.

• You can keep yourselves covered with a blanket.
• You can head to the bathroom and do the deed there (we’ll look at this in a bit).
• You can limit your sexual activities so they’re not so obvious.
• You can save the activity for a red eye, or late night flight when people are asleep.

Concern #2: She’s Too Embarrassed To Do It

Again, if nobody knows, what’s there to be embarrassed about? You can tell her that the two of you can simply hold hands, and kiss a little. Then you can move onto more intimate activities. Only if she feels comfortable will you move on even more. You might suggest she order wine or another drink to help her relax.

Concern #3: She’s Too Shy

She has a general objection to PDAs (public displays of affection). In this case, maybe she’s never thought of herself as the “wild and adventurous” kind of girl. Let her get it in her head and mull it over a bit first. She may soon realize that she’s more interested than she thought she ever would be.

Whatever her concerns are, be certain to reassure her that you won’t do anything that violates appropriate behavior given the circumstances. Tell her that you’ll respect decorum. No matter how excited you are about the possibility of joining that elusive Mile High Club, tell her that you will be discreet, quiet and controlled.

Finally… Let her know that if a problem arises, you’ll take the blame, admit fault, do whatever you have to do to protect her. Once you have reassured your woman that you have a plan, that it will be fun, and that you’ll be the fall guy if you have to, you will likely succeed in convincing her to get busy with you at 30,000 feet.

Ideally, the above discussions should take place before you board the plane or before your trip. However, if you’re already onboard when it occurred to you to see if she’s interested in some “above the skies action“, simply discuss it with her…but respect her concerns.

You can have a low, quiet conversation about things while on the plane. (Tip: Make sure it’s a long fight, so there is time to convince her!)

Now, let’s say you’ve convinced her. Great! Now what? Follow these tips to make your airplane sex fantasy come true.

Get An Aisle Seat

Make sure one of you has an aisle seat. In some cases, you can choose your seat after you buy your ticket.  I always select an aisle seat.  Nothing is worse than having to crawl over people to head to the bathroom to complete the deed. If one of you is on the aisle, you have an easy way to get to the bathroom with a minimum of fuss.

Do It At The Right Time

Go to the bathroom at times that are not busy. This might include meal or snack service, or right before the captain says it’s OK to move about the cabin. (This is when the flight attendants begin getting ready for service but before us regular folk are told it’s fine to start walking around.)

Quick Wipe Down

When you get to the bathroom, try and wipe down any surfaces that might need wiping; if you have any sanitized wipes, even those designed for hands, use them. Then proceed with your hot and illicit lovemaking!

Tell your woman that you’ll make sure she’s good and ready (perhaps some dirty talk beforehand in your seats, or even a little bit of subtle foreplay?) so things go well for her and not just you.

Make It Quick and Quiet

Be prepared for a quiet quickie. This isn’t the time to try out new positions or have all night honeymoon-sex where you moan at the top of your lungs. It’s the time to have fun quickly, quietly and, let’s face it, be proud of the accomplishment.

Another reason to make it quick and quiet is other people may be waiting to use the lavatory.  If they’re standing outside waiting for you two to finish, and they hear some familiar sounds that shouldn’t be heard on board an aircraft, it may give them some suspicion about what you’re doing in there…

How To Exit The Lavatory After Sex

Finally, when it’s time to leave the bathroom, do it in a subtle way. If someone sees you leaving together, say that one of you (decide who ahead of time) was sick and the other was there for comfort and support. (Hey, it will be hard for anyone to prove otherwise.)

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