Ask Dan and Jennifer » romantic ideas

How To Have Romantic Sex On Valentine’s Day

Serena Paige — Tue, 24 Jan 2012 14:00:12 +0000

Valentine’s Day is all about romance, and it should extend past dinner and a movie and into the bedroom. Here’s how to have romantic sex on the 14th!

Sex can go a lot of ways. There are women out there that like their sex to be really dirty and there are women out there who love romantic sex. There is a time and a place for everything. Having romantic sex can bring you closer to your girlfriend or wife and really keep the relationship fresh. It’s also a great way to have sex on Valentine’s Day! This is much different than breaking out the sex swing or an arsenal of silicone toys on February 14th. If your girlfriend or wife is stressing the need for more romantic sex, here is a short guide to help you out.

Leave The Sex Toys At The Door

Romantic sex is all about the two of you, not the vibrating piece of jelly in the drawer. When you’re having romantic sex you want to incorporate your body as much as possible. Vibrators, dildos, cock rings and anything else that you purchased from a sex shop should be left out of the equation. Protection and lubricant are the only exceptions to this rule. A toy can easily take away from your ability to please her. She can always whip out the vibrator when she’s in a jam, but she can’t always have you there. Having romantic sex means that YOU satisfy her needs.

Set The Mood

Setting the mood is one of the biggest things with having sex. You don’t have to have music, but it helps. Choose something with a slower beat if you are going to use music. Pick up around the bedroom before you start in. Having dirty clothes, old cups or anything else that could detract from the deed is best when you want to set the mood. Close the curtains and light a candle or two if you have them. Decorate with Valentine’s Day stuff like balloons, confetti and champagne and strawberries if you have the funds. You want to make the room as calm as possible when you’re having romantic sex. This will put you and her at ease.

Take Her Clothes Off For Her

When you’re just looking for a quickie, you probably rip your clothes off and jump into bed. Instead of getting right down to it, take her clothes off for her and do it slowly. Start with her shirt. If she has a button down on then this can be even better. Unbutton each button slowly as you kiss her. Work your way down to her pants and take them off slowly. Take off her pants and her shirt before you go for the bra and panties. As you take one article of clothing off of her, she should be taking one off of you. This slows the process down and leads to very romantic sex.

Engage In Foreplay

Foreplay is very romantic, especially on Valentine’s Day. Not only will this give the event a quick shot of romance, it will give her time to warm up. When you’re in the foreplay stage make sure that you focus on her lips and neck. Run your hands up and down her body slowly to get her turned on. Remember that women are not like men. They don’t from soft to hard in a matter of seconds. You have to slow things down to bring them to the edge. A lot of foreplay will lead to some of the most romantic sex you have ever had.

No Crazy Sex Positions

Romantic sex should not involve crazy sex positions. The activity is about being close to each other, especially when you’re doing it on Valentine’s Day. If she has legs akimbo and a strain on her neck she’s not going to feel very romantic. Use positions that are fairly common, but focus on eye contact and intimacy. Missionary, girl on top and spooning are some of the best positions for romantic sex. Make sure that you’re staying as close to her as possible when you’re having sex so she feels connected to you. Hold her close as the two of you orgasm to make it even more romantic.

Romantic sex can be one of the best remedies for any relationship, and it’s exactly the right kind of sex to have on Valentine’s Day. Having the physical compatibility in the bedroom can translate to other aspects of your partnership. It’s important to remember that romantic sex should not involve toys or anything that you saw in a porno.

You want this to be an intimate affair between the two of you. Setting the mood can set a precedent for the type of sex that you’re going to have. When you use a lot of foreplay you can get bring her to the edge making it easier for her to orgasm. Following these simple rules will have you and your partner happy with the intimacy you’ve gained throughout your experience.

5 Sexy Homemade Gift Ideas For Valentine’s Day

Kaylen Jackson — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 14:00:26 +0000

Valentine’s Day is approaching, and if you’re short on cash, homemade gift ideas are your best bet. They’re sweet and romantic, without breaking the bank. Plus, a homemade gift is much more special than any store bought one. Here are five you don’t want to pass up on.

Chocolate Covered Strawberries

No, you don’t have to make a trip to your local gourmet chocolate store and spend a ton of money to get a nice box of chocolate covered strawberries. These are easy to make at home and can be easily dressed up for Valentine’s Day with an inexpensive box and some tissue paper.

If you do have some money to spend, you definitely want to go quality here. Get quality, organic strawberries and high quality melting chocolate. Simply dip the strawberries in the melted chocolate and set on a piece of wax paper. Refrigerate until they’re hardened and then arrange them in your decorative box. Voila! Way better than any box of chocolates you buy at the store.

If you want to get creative, look up some recipes on how to use white and milk chocolate together. When you gift them to your partner, make sure to include eating them sensually with a bottle of inexpensive champagne. That’s the best part of all!

Budoir Photos

Get your digital camera and take some sexy photos of yourself in lingerie and then again, in various stages of undress. If you have a friend that you trust to do this, employ them to help you so you can get some better quality photos. Upload them to a free online video editor (or a really good program if you happen to have one, but free editors are good too) and fix blemishes, add a filter if you like or even make it black and white for a really great look.

Once they’re done, print them out on a home photo printer (no, these aren’t ones you can send to your local photo developer) and either frame a few of your favorites or put them in a special book for your lover. If you don’t have a photo printer, make a digital collage and send it to him with a sexy email. He will love being able to look at you instead of porn when he’s feeling randy. Of course, he’ll still look at porn too, but your photos are likely going to be his special favorite.

Sex Coupons

Sex coupons are always in style and extremely easy and inexpensive to make for Valentine’s Day. You can grab some construction paper, markers and glitter from the store if you want to go all out, or you can simply type them out, throw a few cute clip art photos on there and print them. Either way, sex coupons are an excellent option if you don’t have a lot of funds for the big day. Just make sure you actually follow through whenever your man wants to redeem them.

If he wants to redeem a coupon for a 30 minute long blowjob and you say you’ve got a headache, it’s like you’ve taken his gift back to the store, just before he got to open it. So go through with whatever you put on your coupons, whenever your guy redeems them. Headache or not.

Cook A Delectable, Candlelit Dinner

You don’t have to go out to dinner on Valentine’s Day if you don’t want to brave the crowds or don’t have the cash for a decent reservation. Plan a meal that you can cook, and set the table. Most people actually don’t eat at the dining room table, so if you set the table with candles and everything, it’s going to seem almost – almost – like you’re at a restaurant. If you can’t cook, order out! Just make sure you’re sitting across the table from your beau without the distraction of the television, your phones, the computer, etc. To make it sexy, try cooking and eating while completely naked. Or, let him eat dinner off you.

A Sexy Treasure Hunt

Make your man go on a treasure hunt – with you as the treasure! Leave post-its with dirty messages on them, or rose petals leading from the door all the way to the bedroom. Use your creativity to come up with a fun way for him to find you, so long as you’re waiting for him either naked or dressed in something very, very sexy. He will love the suspense of looking for you, only to find you ready and waiting for him!

Romantic Date Ideas For Shy Guys

Chase Christopher — Thu, 19 Jan 2012 23:00:16 +0000

Romantic date ideas are essential for every guy. This includes shy guys. Shy guys can do really well with women because they don’t come off as aggressive, cocky or arrogant. The problem with being shy is hiding emotions. Romantic date ideas are great for women, but shy guys might have problems getting through romantic dates. If you are a shy guy that would like to take a girl out for a romantic date, don’t fret! Here are some romantic date ideas for shy guys.

Jazz Concerts

One of the best romantic date ideas for a shy guy is to take a girl to a jazz concert. Jazz concerts might not be your thing, but the slow beat of the drums and the improvisation is very romantic. As a shy guy, you might not want to be the center of attention. A jazz concert is perfect because it’s usually in a bar or small nightclub. You can sit at a table with your girlfriend in the back of the venue and have a conversation or just listen to the music. Either way, the setting will do most of the work for you. Put your hand on her leg and keep the conversation low so she has to come close to you when she talks.

Art Festivals

Romantic date ideas don’t have to involve traditional dinners and expensive wine. You can take your girl out for a romantic date at an art festival. The best thing about art festivals is that they are usually free. Local art shows also offer a variety of things to browse. Hold your girlfriend by the hand as you go from booth to booth. If you find something that you think she might like, buy it for her. It doesn’t have to be a grandiose painting or anything, but a small piece of jewelry can be very romantic.

The Movies

The movie theater can be a great romantic date idea for you and your girl if you’re a shy guy. The movie theater is dark and allows you get close with her. Put your arm around her or hold her hand to keep the scene romantic. Choose a movie that she really wants to see. Even if this is a terrible romantic comedy you will get points for going with her. Women find romance in a man that does things for them that he really doesn’t want to do. Going to a movie with her is a romantic date idea she will love.

Family Events

Women love a guy who takes her to his family events. If you have a parent’s birthday coming up or an anniversary party, take your girlfriend with you. Bringing your girlfriend with you to a family event is a great romantic date idea because she will start to see herself as part of your family. When she sees herself as part of your family she will feel that there is a future between the two of you. Family events are also good because they can bring you out of your shell a little bit. Who knows you better than your family? Take your girlfriend to your next family event for a romantic evening.

Double Dates

Double dates can be very romantic for shy guys. Get together with a friend who is dating somebody and plan an evening out together. When you are around a friend that has known you for a long time you can be comfortable. Feeling comfortable can make all of the shyness disappear. Get dressed up and make a night out of it to add to the romance. Keep engaged with your girlfriend as well as the other people at the table and put your hand on her thigh throughout the evening to keep her feeling special.

The Ballet

I know. It’s definitely not something that you will want to do, but she will love it. The fact that you’re doing something that she wants make the ballet one of the best romantic date ideas out there. The ballet can be very boring and tedious, but your girlfriend will love watching the grace on stage. Hold her hand throughout the evening and she will definitely feel the romance. If you get really bored, just think about what she will give you afterward.

Being a shy guy doesn’t mean that you can’t take your girlfriend out on a romantic date. There are romantic date ideas for shy guys and you should follow these suggestions to give your girlfriend the romance that she wants. Relationships are about give and take. This is your chance to give.

Romantic Date Ideas For Valentine’s Day That He Will Love

Romy Morgan — Mon, 16 Jan 2012 14:00:34 +0000

Romantic date ideas are usually what guys plan for their girlfriends or wives for Valentine’s Day. However, if you would like to do something romantic that won’t get an eye roll from your partner, you might need a little help. If you have ever taken your boyfriend or husband to the ballet you’ve probably seen them groan or nod off for the entire duration. Choosing a fun, romantic date that your partner will actually enjoy is essential to keeping them engaged while feeding your need for romance. Here are a few romantic date ideas that he will love for Valentine’s Day.

Small Italian Restaurants

Almost everybody loves Italian food. Guys love the meaty red sauces, the filling pastas and the garlic bread. If you want to make the night romantic, try to find an Italian place around your area that is off the beaten path. These are usually found inside the city on a corner or hidden among other stores. Having a back table in a small Italian restaurant will get the romance started quickly. He’ll love the menu and love you for suggesting something new for the relationship. Make it a formal affair and dress up for the night to add more of an edge to your romantic date idea.

Camping

Nothing says Valentine’s Day like sleeping under the stars. If you’re looking for some quality time with your guy, consider camping. Roughing it in the woods and cuddling next to a campfire can easily make for excellent romantic date ideas! Although this is more of a trip, you can make it a date that lasts until the next morning. Instead of using two different sleeping bags, use one as your base and then cuddle with the other one on top of the two of you. Look at the stars and spend the night talking about the future for some easy romance.

Double Dating

Double dating is one of the best romantic date ideas ever! Going out on a double date with your guy and another couple can lead to great conversation and a lot of fun on Valentine’s Day. Choose a night where you want to go out with another couple and make it a little more formal than a regular dinner and a movie. Get dressed up to the point that he would rather stay in the bedroom than go out with another couple. Touch his leg throughout the dinner to make the evening more romantic. When the bill comes, let him pay for you. This time honored tradition will make him feel like a man and can definitely end on a romantic note.

Local Theater

Although your guy undoubtedly doesn’t understand the ballet, he probably wouldn’t mind a trip to the local theater. Local theaters are dirt-cheap and usually have pretty good shows. Check your local theater for shows that are coming up so you and your guy can make plans. Have dinner beforehand and go out for a drink after the show has finished. Local theater will give you all of the aspects of a real Broadway show without the pricey tickets. Choose a show that you think he will like, but will also give you some romance. There are staples of local theater so try to pick a show that you have heard of. If you are not really a theater guru, check local reviews and go from there.

Make A Day Of It

Dates tend to focus on the night rather than the day. If you want to really have a romantic date, try to have a romantic day. Start in the morning with breakfast in bed with your guy or by going out to your favorite eatery. Spend the day shopping together or running errands around town. Running errands together or shopping for a new outfit that he likes can be very romantic. Decide on somewhere to eat dinner or buy something to cook together that night. Finish your day off by cuddling on the couch and watching a movie together. The keyword throughout all of this was “together.” Make sure that you’re not dragging him around to something that is going to be excruciating. He’s a guy so leave some of your more effeminate errands for a later date.

Romantic date ideas don’t have to be some Hollywood representation of chivalry. Romance for a guy is totally different than romance for you. Although the two can intersect at points, it might be hard to tread the line. It’s important to do something that you want to do also, so don’t make the date all about him. Romantic dates don’t even have to leave you home. Follow these suggestions or make a few tweaks to have a great romantic date.

6 Simple Valentine’s Day Date Ideas

Romy Morgan — Sat, 14 Jan 2012 14:00:48 +0000

Valentine’s Day has become a staple for guys to do something romantic for their wives or girlfriends. However, busy lives combined with work schedules do not always leave a lot of time for planning. The truth is that women don’t need fancy dinners or expensive jewelry to have a great Valentine’s Day. You can easily give her a Valentine’s Day she will remember with a simple plan. Don’t know where to get started? Don’t worry. Here’s a few easy things that will help get you thinking.

Cook Yourself

Cooking yourself is not only a great way to save a little money, it can be much more personal. When you go out to a fancy restaurant, you spend money. When you cook at home, you spend time. Women don’t want to be equated to a monetary value. When you suspend your spending and put some heart into your cooking, she will definitely appreciate it much more than taking her to a new French restaurant where she can’t even read the menu. Get fresh vegetables and fresh meat from the market and let her lounge around the house while you cook dinner. When the dinner is done, clean up yourself after drawing her a bath.

Watch Older Movies

Most women aren’t going to find it romantic if you pop in your copy of Predator. Go to Wal-Mart or Best Buy a couple of days before Valentine’s Day and search through the older movies. Casblanca, Breakfast At Tiffany’s and Gone With The Wind are great for Valentine’s Day. Buy the movie and surprise her with it. Curl up on the couch with a glass of wine to give her a Valentine’s Day she will remember. If you don’t think she’ll be into it, pop in Predator and see what kind of results you get.

Live Music

Obviously you have to treat her to dinner, but a great way to spice up a Valentine’s Day is to take her to a bar that has live music. Almost every city will have a jazz bar in it. It doesn’t matter if you’re taking her to The Blue Note or a local dive where the drummer looks half asleep, she will appreciate this. Even if she isn’t into jazz, the slow rhythms and the aspect of seeing live music will be enough to get her going. Order an expensive drink for her slow dance. Even if you’re not a great slow dancer, indulge her for one night. She will appreciate the sentiment.

Wine Tastings

Valentine’s Day is one of the best days to find local events. A good local event for any wine lover is a tasting. If your girlfriend or wife has the pallete for sophistication, find a local restaurant that having a wine tasting. You might need to do this in advance because Valentine’s Day is pretty popular. For the most part these are relatively inexpensive when done with a winery that is local. You might spend $50 at most to get a reservation.

Play A Couple’s Board Game

A cool way to get closer with your girlfriend or wife is play a couple’s board game. These are designed to bring you closer and build the relationship. You can find couple’s board games at local adult oriented stores or online. Some of the more popular ones are “Battle Of The Sexes” and Sexopoly. Try these out with the lights low and some mood music on to give the evening a more intimate feel. This can be a great Valentine’s Day that she will remember.

Traditional Dinners

A traditional dinner date is not the worst idea that you can come up with. The idea is simple enough, but you need to make it original. When you are planning your dinner date, you probably need to call a week or two in advanced. Plan on having dinner at a restaurant that is quiet. The restaurant should have a dress code. Since it is Valentine’s Day you want to keep things a little classy. No, Chili’s is not a classy Valentine’s Day date. Don’t pick a chain restaurant for your dinner.

Try to find a small restaurant in the middle of the city. These always have intimate settings, but they could be hard to get into if you don’t call far enough in advance. Once you have made the reservation, ask about their wine list. If you don’t know anything about wine, research some of the bottles on the list beforehand so you can know about them when the waiter comes to take your order.

7 Ways To Be More Romantic

Chase Christopher — Wed, 04 Jan 2012 17:00:35 +0000

Romance plays a big part in any relationship, but if it wanes, you could be in trouble. Up the romance with these seven simple suggestions.

When you first met your girlfriend, you probably did a lot for her. Surprise dates combined with little gifts and dinner at her favorite restaurant. Over time, the romance can take a nosedive and the relationship can go stale fairly quickly. I’m sure that she still loves you and you still love her, but when a night on the couch becomes the norm, it’s probably time to get a quick shot of romance. Romance can be another language to a guy, but there are a few things that you can do to get the juices flowing in the relationship again. Here are a few tips to get you started.

1. Plan Surprise Dates

Surprise dates are very romantic. Surprise dates usually come at the beginning of relationships for a reason. They are fun and they can be very exciting. Call your wife or girlfriend while they are at work and tell them that you want to take them out for dinner. When they ask where, just say that it’s a surprise. This will instantly get them into a romantic mood. Now make a reservation at a restaurant that you have wanted to try or the first place you had dinner together. If your first date was at a Chili’s you might want to change the venue.

2. Make Her Breakfast

A great to breath a little romance into the relationship is to make her breakfast before she goes to work. Get up early and cook her favorite breakfast. When she wakes up she will smell it cooking in the kitchen. This surprise will make her feel special and appreciated. She will surely wake up with a smile and leave for work happy that she’s with you. Not only will she feel appreciated by the gesture, she will appreciate you for taking the time to do something for her.

3. Send Flowers To Her Work

This is generally done on her birthday or on your anniversary, but doing it on a Tuesday for no reason is also a great way to be more romantic. Women love flowers, but they love having the entire office know that somebody loves them. When a coworker walks by and asks what the occasion is, she can tell them that there wasn’t one. This will make her feel special and she’ll think about you all day while at work.

4. Take A Day Trip

Taking a day trip is a great way to have some alone time together. If you live a couple of hours away from a beach or the mountains, you can easily wake up and take a day trip together. Being away from your every day life and hitting the road will bring you closer and allow you to spend quality time together instead of watching TV. Decide on a couple of places to stop during your day trip and take in the local scenery.

5. Get A Hotel Room

A great way to be romantic is to get a hotel room together in the heart of the nearest city. Sometimes a change of venue can bring a little romance back into the relationship. Get dressed up and have drinks around the city. Go to the nearest bars or clubs and spend the night somewhere other than your own home. This will bring you closer and break up the monotony of spending the night in your bed.

6. Call In Sick Together

She might need a little convincing, but get her to call in sick with you. Calling in sick can be spontaneous and extremely romantic. Spend the entire day in bed together or make a day out of working on a project you have been putting off. Calling in sick on a Friday takes this a step further by giving you a long weekend.

7. Spend One Night A Week Without TV

TV can be a relationship killer. Sitting in front of the TV night after night can make the relationship stale. When your TV shows start to be the only thing you have in common, you should take the TV out of your life for at least one night. Turn off the TV and talk to each other. Talk about future plans or play a couple’s game to bring the romance back into your relationship.

Relationships take work. You can’t keep doing the same things over and over and expect the relationship to sustain itself. By being more romantic you can show her that you really do love her. Being more romantic will bring the spark back into the relationship and keep some of the spontaneity in your connection.

Aphrodisiacs Don’t Work For Me And My Partner! Help!

Gabrielle Moore — Thu, 15 Sep 2011 23:00:29 +0000

An aphrodisiac is a love it or hate it kind of thing. Unfortunately, most couples are a mix of both!

Here’s an example – let’s call this couple Cindi and Sam. Cindi is all for romance and aphrodisiacs and even went to great lengths to prepare a 5-course aphrodisiac dinner – do you know how hard that is? Well, Sam appreciated the dinner alright – then went to the living room and turned on the TV!

Sam is completely aphrodisiac-challenged, while Cindi is the hopeless romantic so to say that there’s tension in their relationship is an understatement.

Where Cindi Went Wrong with Her Aphrodisiac Dinner

What Cindi did wrong here is that she was trying to force romance. There was no ‘primer’ whatsoever. No hints or anything during the day that she wanted to be sexed up that night. So as far as Sam was concerned, it was simply ‘dinner time’. When asked if Sam didn’t get any hints since he was being served a 5-course dinner, he said “Cindi loves to cook. She cooks all the time! I thought she just got it in her head to be elaborate that day.”

Cindi also prepared a meal with aphrodisiacs that SHE believed in and may not necessarily be good for Sam. For instance, when pressed for details, Sam actually said he didn’t like the salad Cindi prepared because he hates arugula (rocket)!

Tips to Help Aphrodisiacs Work For You And Your Lover

Make sure you use aphrodisiacs that you think/know your lover will appreciate. Remember that the goal is to ‘increase his/her sexual desire’ for you so you should use aphrodisiacs that will work on him/her, not on you! As such, stop listing things YOU like and think of your lover.

For women, don’t focus on the chocolate, that’s mostly aphrodisiac stuff for you. Remember, men are ‘visual’ creatures so food that looks like genitalia is better! Go oysters. If budget is a concern, go for clams or mussels instead. For veggies, go for carrots (UN-chopped!) and asparagus as they resemble the penis.

Here’s another trick: use only green asparagus because they’re more appealing to look at and more sturdy after being boiled. Then, I dip the tips in butter and arrange them in a tall glass. What a visual treat! The glistening and dripping tops of the asparagus lend themselves to some horny fantasies!

Give Your Lover Hints

Drop hints during the day. Ok, for people who are not into all this aphrodisiac stuff, you need to aid them here, folks. So why not engage in some active foreplay during the day so your lover is more inclined to be in the right mood and frame of mind when you present your aphrodisiac treats?

Setting Up A Romantic Atmosphere

Compliment aphrodisiac foods and drinks with a romantic setting. Trust me, no type of aphrodisiac will bring about love and naughty thoughts if the washing machines is blaring in the background, if the kids are running and shrieking all around the table and if the dog is barking like the devil himself.

What you need is a relaxing, soothing, and sexy setting. So tidy up the house, dim the lights, put on a Barry White CD and light candles all over the house. Your lover will be in the mood for sex even BEFORE he/she takes a taste of your aphrodisiac treats.

Learn how to drop hints DURING the aphrodisiac meal. For those who have lovers that are truly aphrodisiac-challenged, don’t fret; simply drop hints while serving the aphrodisiac food and drinks.

For women, while serving those asparagus tips, start to put one in your mouth and then casually put it in and out as if you’re simply tasting the salted butter and then say ‘mmmm!’ When your lover turns to you, say “Hey, aren’t asparagus said to be aphrodisiacs?” as if the thought just occurred to you.

For men, DO bring out the chocolates! But instead of simply popping them in your mouth, start to lick it. Make really wet, lapping noises. THAT will get her attention in no time!

Aphrodisiacs HELP in increasing sexual desire, they’re not a magical cure you can administer and simply get results. But with the tips above, you’ll get more success each time you use them!

Romance Tips: How To Set Up A Charming Picnic

Michael Webb — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 23:00:43 +0000

Romance can take many forms, but one of the most adored romantic gestures is a picnic between lovers. Here’s how to set one up for yours.

There is something to be said about leaving the city behind, getting away for a day, enjoying whatever beautiful views nature offers you, stuffing yourself silly and then lay back with a glass of wine or whatever liquid takes your fancy. When the sun is shining there’s only one thing to do – and that is, go on a picnic. Now these are not only good for the happily involved but they are essential when trying to win her back! Obviously the weather plays an important part but remember, you can do it both indoors and outdoors. All it takes is a little creative imagination.

What Food To Bring

Most importantly you must find a place that’s sheltered from the wind yet has a lovely view. Set the scene with candles or lanterns, and your loved one (yes her) will be eating out of the palm of your hand! For dinner include:

Fresh, organic vegetables such as baby carrots, cucumber fingers, baby sweet corn, broccoli, cherry tomatoes and serve with dips such as guacamole, hummus or chopped tomato in cottage cheese, suggests planning and preparation and you can grill the vegetables beforehand for something a little different.
Cold meats with cheeses such as Camembert and Brie also work well as snacks. The cheese can also be eaten with fruit or crackers.
It’s always a good idea to stick to finger foods for romantic picnics; this way you can feed each other.
For something more substantial, make a variety of wraps with cottage cheese and pineapple filling; and pita bread with stuffed with tuna salad, feta and avocado, or feta and carrot.
A bottle of wine or bubbly makes it a special occasion, but remember to first check whether alcohol is allowed at your spot of choice — and pack two of your prettiest glasses for the occasion.
Round off your rendezvous with some decadent dark chocolate-tipped strawberries.

Although it seems as though this is a daunting task, and it really doesn’t have to be. A little planning beforehand can make you look like a pro and what better way to impress her than if you can honestly tell her you prepared it yourself. Certain foods are easy and quick to prepare such as cheese and crackers, muffins, grapes, strawberries (these always score big points for the romantic), chips and dips etc., always work well.

Throw in a bottle of wine or some champagne or if going for something non-alcoholic – a chilled fresh fruit juice. When organizing your basket the utensils you bring with are very important.

Setting The Mood

Try to pick a day where the weather is just right for being outside. A sunny, breezy morning is great for brunch, while evening is full of romance and much better for drinking champagne – although you can always do mimosas in the morning! You want to make sure you have the right tools on hand for comfort:

A blanket, of course, is a must. If you really want to be nostalgic about it, find one in a classic red gingham print. A wooden basket is also a nice touch. Any soft blanket will do though.
Think about bringing supportive pillows. Inexpensive throw pillows that you keep just for the occasion can help your partner feel more comfortable during your excursion. They’re not large or heavy and are easy to take with you. This can also help create a feeling of romance if you are able to lean back some or lie down next to your partner – and they’re better for sex if you and your lover are in a secluded spot!
If there’s not a lot of wind, think about bringing candles. Jar candles are your best bet here, because they are shielded some from wind and external elements. While candles aren’t very practical if you’re having a morning or afternoon get together, they can be super romantic if you are having an evening get together.
Bug repellent is also a must. It’s not super sexy to spray you and your partner down with bug spray before eating (make sure you wash your hands first!) but it will keep the mosquitoes away. It’s hard to create romance when you’re doing nothing but scratching at bug bites! Instead of bug spray, consider using citronella candles or torches that cover a wider area, so your area will be romantically lit and bug free!

No matter what you choose to do for your get together, make sure that your partner feels appreciated and cherished. This is part of the romance – spending time away from the daily grind to eat, drink and reconnect. It’s a wonderful experience no matter how you decide to do it!

How To Set Up A Perfect Date At Home

Michael Webb — Tue, 26 Jul 2011 23:00:26 +0000

Date ideas for the summer are fun – going to the fair, going swimming or just hanging out in the backyard grilling. However, the romance really gets going when the temperature outside starts dropping. Cooler weather gives us the perfect opportunity for romantic date ideas – just think: fireplaces, snugly duvets, hot chocolate, romantic movies and comfort foods like pizza and pasta. Here is a great idea for getting cozy this winter.

You can either organize this date together as a couple, or you can use it as an excuse to create a sense of “togetherness” or “team spirit” in the relationship. Alternatively, for extra romance and excitement, you can organize a surprise date for your partner. One suggestion is to have a date at home and call it “Movie Night.”

The Makings Of A Good “Movie Night”

If you or your partner has kids, then the number one priority is finding a good baby sitter – or leaving the kids with their doting grandparents for the evening. After that, the night is all yours. While you may be tempted to plan an evening where you can watch movies with the kids, this doesn’t give your lover the feeling of romance at all. That would be considered more of a “family night,” which is a great idea for another time.

If You’re Surprising Your Partner

If the evening is a surprise for her, you can make her feel extra-special by organizing the movie night around her favorite things. My suggestion would be to choose a romantic “chick-flick” type movie and order her favorite take-out. Also, don’t even think about forgetting her favorite ice-cream or dessert!

A movie night full of romance means popcorn and junk food – so stock up on all of these. The more choice there is, the more she will see how much effort has been involved. Before she gets home, make sure everything is neat and tidy and that she does not have to do any work. You want her relaxed and pleasantly surprised.

Get The Place Ready

Set up the sitting room/television area with comfortable cushions and warm blankets – you could even put a mattress on the floor. Before you start the movie, chat about the good old days, about how the two of you met and what you thought at that moment. Look back at the travels and enjoyable times you two had together and all the fun moments. If need be, bring out the photo albums and browse through pictures of the two of you together and recall what was happening when that picture was taken. This is all part of the warm-up for later.

When You’re Ready For The Movie

After reminiscing about everything that you and your partner have gone through to get where you are today, it’s time to refill the wine/champagne/snifter glasses, dim the lighting and press play. Snuggle with her during the movie, hold hands and play footsie. Make sure you’re maintaining that flirty feeling throughout the movie – what you want her to do is to be thinking mostly about you but “pretending” to watch the movie. This is intense mental foreplay and works wonders for women!

Finally, when the movie is over and there is this “awww geesh” kind of feeling in the air, get up silently, switch on the CD and invite your lady to dance with you to your favorite song.

Taking The Evening A Little Farther

If you’ve done everything right and your girl is in the mood for love, she may start to flirt with you and get a little frisky. If you feel like this is where the evening is headed, let it! Kiss your partner deeply and release the passion you’ve been feeling for her since before you started the movie. Let her feel that you’ve been waiting for her all night long. She will respond to this very well and will most likely head to the bedroom with you for night of hot, passionate sex!

How To Cook For A Woman And Win Her Heart

Michael Webb — Fri, 08 Jul 2011 23:00:36 +0000

Girls love coming home from work and not having to fix a meal – so surprise her with your skills as a chef – and follow it up with an evening full of romance. If you play your cards right, you could definitely make your girl swoon, and you might just get a little nookie out of the deal too! Here’s how to plan a super special evening where you’re in control and all she has to do is sit back and relax!

Preparation Is Important

Preparation is important here! Make sure your home is neat, tidy and most of all, comfortable. If you have kids, make sure you have organized a babysitter who can watch the children in their home. If this isn’t feasible, arrange to have a babysitter on standby at your home. Make sure that whoever is watching your kids is prepared for “overtime” if you and your lover end up getting a little frisky after dinner.

Set a flirty mood by sending the invitation to dinner to her office, leave it on her bed, in her briefcase or even send a romantic electronic invite. The fact that you actually took the time to “formally” invite her to dinner at your home will intrigue her enough that you’re almost guaranteed a “yes!”

Planning The Menu

Make sure you plan the menu well ahead of time and shop for the ingredients that you need a few days before your date. This way, if there’s anything that you’ve missed or that you run out of, you still have plenty of time to run to the store without things turning into a giant mess.

Figuring out what to make can be difficult, because you want something that is quick enough that it leaves you time for seduction at the end of the meal but you also want something nice enough that it will impress your gal. Furthermore, you don’t want something so complicated that you’re bound to screw it up and you also want to make sure it’s something she’ll actually like too! What a list! Make sure you know about any food allergies your partner may or may not have before you go shopping.

Time For Fun!

Now’s the time for “dress up” or should we call it “dress down.” Choose a masculine apron and strip naked, leaving your front covered with just your butt cheeks showing. Obviously, you would have ensured that you are freshly showered, wearing your best aftershave and have removed any unwanted hair she might have an aversion to (be it back or butt hair for that matter!).

Make a slightly exaggerated but “cheeky” effort in transforming your lounge/dining room into a sensual, romantic setting. Bend over catching her eye as you lay out the scented candles; carefully chosen mood music and table settings. Adjust the suitable temperature heating (comfortable enough to disrobe in) and check the working CD/IPOD.

Getting Down To Business

Now it’s time for the “main course.” Act the part of the gentleman and tell her you are going to “dress for dinner,” and come out in your TUX (or as fancy as you have). If she objects, saying that she would rather you stay as you are – then obey the lady, after all, the intention is to get naked anyway.

Surprise her by playing a little scene out of the movie (9½ weeks) by blindfolding her; feeding her little portions from the plate and making her guess what food it is. If she gets it wrong, she has to pay a forfeit and what forfeit is entirely up to you – use your imagination and choose one that she would feel comfortable with. Reverse the roles and allow her to do the same to you. Feeding one another is a highly erotic aspect of foreplay that bodes extremely well in building up anticipation.

Following Up With Romance

Last but not least, make sure you have scattered red rose petals all over the area you plan to use to make love, whether it is the bedroom, fireplace or next to the hot tub! You will have planned this before you started cooking, so that you and your lover have a romantic, sensual place to go when things get too hot in the kitchen!

Relationship Advice: How To Travel Together For The First Time

Andrew Wang — Sun, 03 Jul 2011 23:00:52 +0000

In a relationship, you’re going to want to go places with your partner at some point. Here’s how to make sure your relationship survives the trip.

It can be very exciting when the time comes for you and your significant other to take your first vacation together. Time away from your everyday surroundings and obligations can make for a truly wonderful bonding experience. But travels don’t always go as planned, and you may find yourself encountering a side of your partner you don’t find very attractive. How can you make sure that your trip goes smoothly? Lots of advance planning helps, along with patience and a good sense of humor.

Plan Ahead!

It’s always important to have a rock solid plan when you’re traveling, but never more so than when it’s the first time in the relationship that you and your mate go away together. The better you plan, the less you’ll have to worry over during the trip. First and foremost, make sure to pick a place you’re both truly interested in visiting. Since it’s your first trip together, unless you’re both seasoned travelers, you should probably stay closer to home.

A domestic destination promises a shorter flight, no need for passports, and no language barrier to worry about. It can also make for a more affordable trip, which can help eliminate a common traveling worry—overspending. Minimizing stressors before you’ve even stepped into the airport can be very helpful. Speaking of airports, you’ll also need to decide on a mode of transportation. For a first trip, flying or taking a train is probably your best option.

Road trips are notorious for quickly going from great to terrible; you can get lost, your car can break down, etc. While flying and taking the train also have their drawbacks, at least neither of you will be directly to blame if something does go wrong. After settling on a destination and a mode of transportation, make sure to pick your accommodations together. Agree ahead of time on how you’ll pay for your lodgings, so you won’t have to worry about it later.

Allow For Extra Time & Plan What To Pack

A few days prior to your trip, plan how you’ll be getting to the airport or train station. Establish a meeting time and place that allows you both extra time to get there. If one of you cuts it too close and is late, you’ll be starting your romantic getaway with a guaranteed fight. Next, plan what to pack together. You want to make sure that both of you bring the right clothing for any activities that either of you have in mind, like a fancy dinner out, hiking, swimming, etc. That way, none of your plans will be ruined because someone doesn’t have the right clothing to participate.

You should also make sure you both pack a few things to keep you entertained on the journey. You’ll want to bring a couple of things you can enjoy together, like playing cards. However, you shouldn’t assume that your mate will stay awake and entertain you through the whole flight. Bring a book or an MP3 player in case your S.O. falls asleep while you’re en route.

Remember To Have Fun!

Once you’ve arrived, let the fun begin. Different people have different traveling styles, so you may discover that you’re more laidback, while the person you’re in a relationship with is a scheduler. If you two don’t see eye to eye on how to manage your daily activities, try to compromise. Block out half of the day to be spontaneous and the other half to stick to an itinerary. Being able to compromise during your vacation won’t just make your trip easier, but will also demonstrate that you are generally considerate.

What if you encounter a traveling disaster? How you handle little road bumps will say a lot about you as a person and a partner. Try not to panic or go into heavy complaint mode. Remain calm, help your mate calm down as well, and remind yourselves that you’re just on vacation. Don’t let someone’s lost wallet or an extreme flight delay ruin your entire trip. Showing some grace under pressure and keeping things light will turn you into a hero.

Don’t Let A Bad Vacation Ruin Your Relationship

What if the vacation disaster is that you really don’t like being with your boyfriend or girlfriend 24/7? The best thing you can do is suck it up and weather the trip, then get home and think about where your relationship is headed. Don’t do anything rash when you’re away from home. While a vacation together can teach you a lot about each other, you shouldn’t let one bad week in unfamiliar territory ruin your entire relationship. Of course, most vacations go wonderfully, and you may return more in love than ever before. Planning ahead and staying flexible once you arrive will certainly help toward getting that happy result.

How To Buy The Perfect Gift For Your Partner

Andrew Wang — Thu, 16 Jun 2011 23:00:03 +0000

Romance means buying gifts for your partner, whether it’s your fifteenth Christmas together or first Valentine’s Day. Gift giving is just part of being in a relationship. Choosing a present to give to your S.O. is a bit more complex than getting one for your sibling or coworker.

Many factors can go into your decision— how long you’ve been together, your budget, how serious your relationship currently is and how serious you hope it will shortly become. On top of all that, you also want to make sure you get your partner something he or she will genuinely like.

Consider The Situation You’re Buying For

One of the most important things to consider when choosing a gift for your S.O. is whether or not it will be appropriate for the particular situation. The first factor to mull over is exactly what will work for the point you’re at in your relationship. If you’ve been dating for a couple of weeks and your boyfriend or girlfriend’s birthday is at hand, you want to get them a good gift, but nothing so over the top with romance that it catches them off guard.

A gift like pricey jewelry or a vacation is fine when you’ve been together for a few years, but could be misconstrued early on in a relationship. Plus, it’s also important to consider shopping within an appropriate budget. When there’s a holiday that involves an exchange of gifts, you don’t want to overspend and make your partner feel like they were cheap by comparison.

Of course, if you’ve been together for a few years and buy your partner something obviously inexpensive, that can be equally awkward. As a rule, if you think about how serious your relationship is, then seek out a gift that’s similarly serious, you’ll be fine.

Think Outside The Box

The quality of the gift is not always determined by the cost. It’s most important to show that you put actual thought into the gift you’re getting. If you know that your significant other likes flowers and jewelry, or other more typical gifts, then that’s fine. Yet you’ll be amazed at how much more your gift will be appreciated if you think a bit outside of the box. Instead of picking out a typical piece of jewelry from a chain store, choose something one-of-a-kind from a boutique or a site like Etsy.com.

If you’re buying any kind of clothing, jewelry, etc., also be sure to pay attention to what your S.O. already wears. If you buy them something that reflects their tastes instead of yours, they’ll be certain to love it and wear it often. You’ll also demonstrate that you’ve been paying attention to their taste, which proves that you’re thoughtful. Hard to find items, like out-of-print books or DVD’s, can also make impressive gifts, because you had to work a little to track them down.

Give Your Partner An Experience

Great dates can also be full of romance and make excellent gifts. While surprise vacations can be wonderful gifts for people in more serious relationships, there are smaller activity gifts that work well even after a few weeks of dating. Perhaps you know that your boyfriend loves a certain sports team, or your girlfriend has a favorite band that’s on tour.

Purchase a pair of tickets to an upcoming game or concert, plan a day around it, and give your partner the gift of some awesome memories. You’ll score even more points if you’re willing to take your partner out for something you’re not personally interested in. If you can make it through a few Tango classes despite your distaste for dancing, your Latin-dance-loving partner will appreciate it all the more.

Keeping Things Low Cost By Making A Gift

If you’re working on a small budget, you can always create a gift yourself. Handmade presents don’t have to be cheesy or seem cheap. If you have a talent, run with it—create a piece of art, bake a bunch of sweets to put in a goody basket, or curate a music mix that you know your S.O. will enjoy. Handmade touches can also add a personal element of romance to a purchased gift.

For instance, sticking concert tickets into a case with a mix CD you made shows extra initiative and creativity. Thoughtful packaging doesn’t have to be homemade, either. If your sweetheart has a funny bone, you can add some humor by hiding a more meaningful present in something silly, like sticking a piece of jewelry inside a goofy novelty mug.

Knowing Your Partner

Ultimately, if you’re observant and take note of your significant other’s tastes and personality, you can give a great gift. Put thought and time into what you choose, and your boyfriend or girlfriend will be able to tell the minute they open it. You’ll impress them and show them how much you love them, whether your budget is big or small, your relationship long term or new.

How To Plan An Incredible Date

Andrew Wang — Fri, 10 Jun 2011 23:00:31 +0000

Dating involves coming up with new ideas for dates all the time – check out these amazing tips if you really want to add the “WOW” factor to your next date!

Whether there’s a special occasion on the horizon, like your significant other’s birthday, or it’s just your turn to decide on Friday night’s date, you can make plans that will impress your partner. A little effort and forethought can go a long way toward coming up with a fantastic date concept.

How To Plan The Perfect Date

The key to planning the perfect date is to build it around your mate’s interests. In an ideal world, you’ll be able to find points of interest that you both share. Sometimes, however, you’ll find that you need to go with some ideas that won’t be quite as enjoyable to you as they are to your S.O. Either way, by demonstrating that you’ve paid attention to your partner’s interests, you will be sure to impress and please them.

So start mulling over your mate’s favorite activities, and think back to anything they might have mentioned in recent conversations. Is he/she a music fan, a sports fanatic or a film buff? Whether they’re a foodie, a bookworm, or a theater lover, try to find an out-of-the-ordinary event tied to their big interest.

How To Find Great Date Ideas

Check out the internet or the arts and entertainment section of your local newspaper for upcoming events. Then start thinking outside the box. If your boyfriend or girlfriend is an art lover, see if the city nearest you has a gallery crawl night. It’s like an extra-special trip to the museum. If she is in love with boos, take her to a reading by one of their favorite authors at a local bookstore.

If there’s not a particularly fitting event coming up, try finding a learning experience you can enjoy together. If your S.O. is a gourmand, try taking a cooking class or going to a wine or coffee tasting seminar. If you’re both fitness fiends, look for a walk-in yoga or kick boxing class to attend. Learning experiences are the dates that keep on giving, whether you end up signing up for more classes together or practicing your new skills as a team at home.

Great Dates Can Last All Day – Or Night!

Another key to planning the perfect date is going beyond one simple event. Don’t just buy two tickets to a hard to find foreign film playing at the art house theater near you. Make a full night or afternoon of it. Plan a meal before the movie at a nearby restaurant that serves your S.O.’s favorite kind of food. Then, after the film, grab coffee or drinks together at a new bar or café you haven’t gone to before.

Experiencing new places and things together helps give you both unique memories together. Likewise, you can go the opposite route and recreate elements of a favorite date from earlier in your relationship. Demonstrating that you paid such great attention to a previously beloved evening can be very romantic.

Planning A Theme Date

Going so far as to plan a theme for your date can also be very impressive. Say your boyfriend or girlfriend is a big jazz lover, and you get tickets to see a jazz band perform. Try planning a ‘50s beatnik evening, starting at a coffee house before the performance followed by dinner at a French bistro. You don’t have to dress the part or anything, but that extra attention to detail shows your S.O. how much thought you put into your date ideas.

Even a night in can be more fun with a theme. Instead of your normal Friday night of pizza and TV, try surprising your mate with something unexpected. A homemade Moroccan dinner followed by mint tea and Casablanca on DVD can make for a great evening. In the end, if you show that you considered your partner’s unique tastes and took the time to plan something special, you’ll be sure to have an amazing time together.

Little Everyday Things that Keep Romance Alive

Andrew Wang — Fri, 15 Apr 2011 14:00:06 +0000

Romance tends to fade in long term relationships and once you’ve been together for awhile, it can be easy to assume that your mate knows just how much you love them. As you settle into a more routine state of couple-hood, however, you may find that some of the romance and excitement has faded.

It’s important to make sure that you make an effort express your love and affection for your significant other on a regular basis. Keeping the passion of your early relationship going doesn’t require a big production, either. There are easy everyday gestures that you can make that will let your partner know just exactly how much you love them.

Love Is A Basic Human Need

As human beings, we all need to feel loved and cared for. The mere act of doing someone a favor without their having to ask can show just how much you feel for them. There are all sorts of simple favors you can perform on any given day. If your S.O. typically takes their lunch to work, wake up ten minutes early and make it for them every once and awhile.

Volunteer to take over their half of the chores when you know they’ve had a particularly bad week. If you don’t live together, offer to come over and make them dinner or clean their place, instead. These small gestures are thoughtful and truly helpful, and your girlfriend or boyfriend will find them incredibly sweet.

Little Things Make It Romantic

Doing things without any major motive is also a way to bring romance into your relationship. Bringing over flowers just for the heck of it, or serving up breakfast in bed on a Saturday morning, are two classic examples. There are other great random acts, too. There are lots of opportunities to surprise your partner with inexpensive but thoughtful little gifts.

While you’re out grocery shopping, pick up your mate’s favorite candy bar or snack. Bring over a bottle of champagne or sparkling wine to add an extra air of romance to a typical evening in. Did your S.O. recently mention in passing how much they loved eating chocolate chip cookies as a kid? Surprise them with a homemade batch courtesy of yours truly.

Don’t Forget Physical Intimacy

Of course, love also has its physical side. Making sure to kiss and hug everyday is very meaningful. Even if it’s just a quick peck goodbye in the morning, it helps to keep you physically connected. If you see your S.O. sitting around looking stressed out, walk over and give them a five minute shoulder rub and a kiss on the cheek. When you’re watching TV or a movie, sit side by side and hold hands or cuddle. If you feel like sneaking a kiss or two during the commercial break, and that leads to more, then more power to you. The important thing is to keep up regular physical contact. You’ll both be happier for it.

Saying, “I Love You”

There is another simple way to remind your partner of how much you love them. Just tell them. Say it every night before bed or every morning before you leave for work. Say it right before you hang up on the phone or type it at the end of your text. The phrase “I love you” can be reassuring, romantic—even sexy. No matter when or how you say it, make sure that you do. It’s important to put that little daily reminder across to your S.O., so they’ll always know how you feel about them. Combine these words with the other aforementioned thoughtful gestures, and everyday will have an air of romance about it.

5 Cheap Valentine’s Day Surprises For Your Partner – For Under $10

Kaylen Jackson — Mon, 07 Feb 2011 23:00:15 +0000

Valentine’s Day is the perfect day to surprise your partner with some amazing gifts, but does that mean you have to buy flowers, chocolate, champagne or jewelry to make the day special? Absolutely not! You can make Valentine’s Day the best one your lover’s ever had by being creative – and checking out these great ideas that your wallet will definitely appreciate.

Jar Of Hearts

Before Valentine’s Day, buy one of those huge jars of pickles from the grocery store and transfer the pickles into a large plastic container. Your shopping list should also include red or pink paint and red, pink and white construction paper. Yes, this is starting to sound like a kid’s Valentine’s Day craft project, but rest assured that your partner will absolutely love it when you’re done. Cut the construction paper into medium sized hearts, enough to fill the jar as full as you’d like – the fuller it is with paper hearts, the better. On each heart, you’re going to write something you love about your partner. Put all the hearts in the jar and swipe a layer or two of red or pink paint on the jar lid. Tie a red ribbon around the top for an extra-special touch. Leave it somewhere your lover will find it on Valentine’s Day!

Project Estimate:

Pickle Jar $5, Construction Paper $3, Paint $1 = $9

Photo Montage

If you have a lot of photos of you and your significant other together, consider putting together a photo montage together for Valentine’s Day. There are lots of ways the end project can turn out, but you have to get your photo prints first. Most places (both online and off) will do a single 4×6″ photo print for about $0.08, but watch for special offers from online companies like Winkflash – where you can sometimes get 50 free prints and $0.99 shipping if you’re a new customer. Using an online photo printing company is also better if your pictures are in a digital format. Buy a poster size frame and a sheet of poster board, cutting the poster board to fit the frame. Glue the pictures to the poster board and mount in the frame. Voila! A sweet, thoughtful photo montage that will sweep your partner off their feet.

Project Estimate:

Frame $5, Poster Board $0.50, Glue $1, Photos $3 = $9.50

Sensual Massage

Women love getting massages, but coughing up $50 for a Valentine’s Day gift certificate for an hour long massage isn’t within a lot of guys’ February budgets. Try giving your partner a erotic massage yourself for Valentine’s Day instead! It’s a great gift because you can make it last as long as you want and it’s incredibly inexpensive. You probably want to splurge on some kind of scented or pheromone laced massage oil to set the mood and relax your partner, such as Adam & Eve’s Pheromone Massage Oil. Candles are optional but definitely well worth it if you decide to get them – you can often find a large bag of plain tea light candles at the dollar store. Imagine the romance you’ll create with a hundred tea light candles! Bonus points if it leads to sex!

Project Estimate:

Adam & Eve’s Pheromone Massage Oil $5 (50% off and free shipping with offer code DANJENN), Tea Lights $2 = $7

Dinner And A Movie – At Home

Instead of going out on Valentine’s Day, why not stay in? Plan a romantic candlelight dinner at home cooked by you, followed by a night of romantic movies (or whatever movies you and your partner enjoy most). Make whatever you were planning on making for dinner anyways, but spice it up by putting it on your best dinnerware and eating by candlelight at the table. Play some soft music and definitely don’t turn on the TV! Pop some microwave popcorn and rent a few movies from your local movie kiosk. Enjoy!

Project Estimate:

Taper Candles $3, Candle Holders $2, Movie Rentals $2 = $7

Balloon Notes

Buy a pack of Valentine’s Day themed balloons and some construction paper. Cut the construction paper out into hearts, making as many hearts as there are balloons. Write something you love about your partner on each heart and place it inside the balloon. Blow the balloon up and tie it off, writing “Pop Me” on the balloons with a Sharpie marker. Scatter the balloons all over your partner’s bedroom floor before they wake up in the morning and make sure you set the alarm a little earlier than usual so they have time to pop all the balloons and read your loving messages before heading to work for the day!

Project Estimate:

Construction Paper $3, Balloons $2.50, Sharpie Marker $1 = $6.50

Valentine’s Day – 8 Creative Ways To Say I Love You

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 06 Feb 2011 14:00:12 +0000

Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to cost you an arm and a leg if all you’re trying to do is say “I love you” to your partner. But sometimes those three little words just aren’t enough, especially on Valentine’s Day. Here are some awesome, creative ideas that will help you show your partner how you feel.

Mow The Lawn

This Valentine’s Day, put an “I love you” message in the lawn. This works best if you live in a warmer area and actually have grass to cut in February. With the mower, write your message in the grass – it helps if you spray paint the grass first so you have a guide while you’re mowing. If you have a smaller lawn, just mow a heart. When you’re done, have your partner look at it from a window on the second story!

Make Toast

Check out online cookware outlets or check your local specialty food stores and get an “I love you” toast stamper. They’re sweet, easy to use and usually inexpensive. Make your partner breakfast in bed for Valentine’s Day, and use the stamper to mark the toast. Your lover will be so surprised that your “I love you” message is on the bread!

Tattoo Their Name On Your Body – For Fake

Before Valentine’s Day, order a special made fake tattoo with their name on it. A quick online search will reveal tons of places you can order name tattoos in just about any kind of font, but be careful when browsing websites that require a minimum bulk order. When you get the tattoo, apply it somewhere on your body in secret. Let them discover it next time you have sex! They’ll think it’s real!

Make A Fashion Statement

Make a t-shirt with their picture on it that says “I love ___.” These are usually easy and inexpensive to make, whether you order one online or have one made by your local photo store. Heck, you can even use a plain t-shirt and puff paints if you want to. The idea is that this “I love you” message is a cheesy Valentine’s Day idea, but it’s funny and sweet. Proclaim your love to everyone when you wear it!

Name A Star For Your Partner

This Valentine’s Day, do something sweet and special like naming a star after your partner. However, get a little creative with it. Instead of just naming it “Karen” after her, make the name “Jeffery loves Karen” be the name of the star. You can also try, “I love you Karen,” or a line from the lyrics of your favorite song together. Make sure you’re able to locate it with a telescope so your partner can really enjoy it. This is especially great if you and your lover enjoy stargazing together.

Make A Radio Announcement

Plan to have a radio announcement say “I love you” to your significant other on Valentine’s Day. You can also dedicate a song to your lover and have it played after the announcement. Make it super special by having “your song” played. Make sure you put it on the radio station that your partner actually listens to, and know approximately what time the announcement will be aired. That way, you can set up a radio in the bathroom to play while they get ready for work, or you can make sure it’s on that station while you carpool home at the end of the day.

Make A Lighted Message

Cut out the words “I love you” in a black garbage bag. Tape it up to a window in your home and turn off all the lights in your house except for the lights in that one room. Make sure ALL the lights in that room are turned on. This works best if you plan to get home from work a little while before your partner does on Valentine’s Day. When your significant other walks up the drive after work, they’ll see your lighted message!

Put Up A New Background Pic

This is a great Valentine’s Day idea for someone you’ve been with for awhile (and who doesn’t mind you looking at or using their phone or computer), because if you do this for someone you’ve only been dating for a short while, it could actually backfire on you and creep them out. Change the screensaver or desktop background on their computer or phone with a picture of you two and an “I love you” message. Next time they flip open their laptop or check their phone, they’ll see your message!

Valentine’s Day – 5 Romantic Ideas To Make It Extra Special

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 30 Jan 2011 14:00:42 +0000

Valentines Day can be nerve wracking if you’re not sure what to get your partner as a gift. Sure, you can buy jewelry, plan a romantic dinner and do the whole flowers and chocolate thing, or you can plan something much more loving and romantic that will literally blow your lover away with your thoughtfulness. Check out these great romantic Valentines Day ideas and surprise your lover with something much more than a simple gift!

Arrange For Both Of You To Take The Day Off

Surprise your honey on Valentines Day with a day off for both of you – but arrange for her day off with her boss in private so she doesn’t know about it. Make breakfast for her in the morning and let her know that she doesn’t have to go in to work, and then spend the day going out on a date, having lunch, shopping or catching a new movie together at the theater. Whatever it is that you and your partner enjoy doing, spend the Valentines Day doing it together and take the opportunity to bond and reconnect.

12 Days Of Valentines

You’ve heard of the 12 days of Christmas, right? Take that concept and apply it to Valentines Day this year. For the twelve days leading up to Valentines Day, give your partner small gifts on every day, saving the biggest and best gift for the 14th. The gifts can be small or large, depending on your budget. Small gifts work just as well if you aren’t able to spend a lot of money, because the idea behind this “gift” is that you’re showing your partner that you’re thinking of them every day for twelve days! The gifts can be flowers and chocolate, kisses, cards, letters, etc. Just use your imagination! The idea is to celebrate your love for twelve consecutive days, regardless of which gifts you choose to give on those days.

Plan A Getaway

If you have the money to spend, plan a short getaway with your partner for the weekend or just for a couple days. Go somewhere warm and sunny just when it’s coldest outside, or if you enjoy the cold, rent a cabin in the mountains and spend a few days snuggling by a fire and tearing up the ski slopes. Even if you don’t have the budget for an entire weekend trip, plan a night out at a hotel in your town or a nearby town. You’d be surprised at how even just one single night at a hotel and just getting out of the house on Valentines Day can make a huge difference in how hot your sex life is! Plan for an awesome night, try new sex positions or even play a few sex games that will get you and your lover’s blood boiling for each other.

Bring Back The Mix Tapes

Remember back in the day when you would make a mix tape for someone you cared about and give it to them as a gift? Bring that idea back this Valentines Day, but do it in an updated way. Buy your partner a nice MP3 player and load it up full of your favorite songs. Make sure you fill it with songs that mean something to the two of you, especially if you have a song that you both consider as being “your song.” Wrap the MP3 player up and gift it to your lover to show them how much you really love them!

Rent An Inflatable Hot Tub

If you think you can’t afford a hot tub or have to rent a hotel with a jacuzzi in the room just to get your bubbly on this Valentines Day, think again! Lots of cities have places where you can rent an inflatable hot tub, even just for a few nights! Set up the inflatable hot tub in the middle of your living room or bedroom (or on the back deck, or wherever you have space) and surround it with hundreds of candles or sparkling lights. If you have two stories, make sure you find space on the bottom floor of your house or apartment to set up the hot tub to make sure there aren’t any huge accidents. Share a great conversation with your lover in the hot tub while sipping champagne and feeding each other chocolate, strawberries or your other favorite sexy foods. If you plan on having sex in the hot tub, make sure you use silicone lube – water based lube isn’t going to hold up for very long in the water because it rinses right off!

5 Romantic Room Decoration Ideas

Lee Jenkins — Thu, 27 Jan 2011 23:00:44 +0000

Romance is important whether you’re a bachelor or you’re married and your bedroom is the most important place in the home. This is where all the lovemaking happens, and this is where you make up with your partner after a day of not talking to each other. Every culture in the world has a term for a man who was forced to stay out of the bedroom because of some major transgression, or because his wife is too mad at him to spend the night in bed together.

Create Enough Floor Space

A romantic bedroom is not cramped, so you need to free up the floor and clear the clutter. Sometimes, you’re so in the mood that you never reach the bed. Therefore, your bedroom floor must be impeccably maintained all the time. Some giant floor pillows may be parked in the corner for when you’re in the mood to have sex on the floor.

Aromatherapy

Burning aromatherapy oils is one of the easiest ways to set the mood. Go for lilac, sandalwood, ylang-ylang or other tropical scents that remind you of the beach or a mountain resort. Whether you use oils or wax is up to you, but in my opinion, a small burner with enough oil is easier to maintain and snuff out than a few dozen scented candles. A candle-lit room is definitely romantic, but you don’t want to be running around naked and carrying a fire extinguisher if the curtains catch fire.

Heavy Drapes and Thicker Walls

The room you’re doing it in needs to be fortified with thicker walls if you cannot afford to make it soundproof. Choose multi-layer drapes in a color that complements the walls. If your walls are white, go for darker-colored drapes.

Heavy drapes will keep your dirty talk from reaching your neighbors’ ears, which is something that a flimsy set of Venetian blinds can’t do. Someone shouting ‘keep it down, will you’ from across the street can be a real mood killer, especially when you’re so into the lovemaking, which is why you need to protect your intimate moments with drapes.

Slipcovers for the Chaise Lounge

Use durable, waterproof slipcovers for the sofa inside your bedroom. Why? So that you can do it there without worrying about stains. No matter how careful you are, you are likely to leave stains on furniture in the heat of the moment, that’s why it’s better to protect your couch or love seat using slipcovers. It’s embarrassing to have to explain a mean-looking stain to the one doing your upholstery work. Slipcovers are inexpensive and they can help keep your sex spontaneous.

Paint The Ceiling

If you spend a lot of time in bed with your partner, the ceiling can become one of the most familiar sights to you. A good-looking ceiling is something to stare at while you’re in the throes of lovemaking. If your partner is doing all the work for you and you’re lying flat on your back, you cannot help but glance at your bedroom ceiling. If you see some cracks or peeling plaster on the ceiling, your mood sours a little.

4 Romantic Things To Do For Your Boyfriend

Jessica Perez — Tue, 07 Dec 2010 14:00:00 +0000

Romance becomes passé when the relationship has hit a plateau. If you’re wondering when this happens, here are some hints that the relationship is heading toward a rut:

You act like strangers around each other.
You become too lazy to have sex with your partner.
Everything your partner does seems irritating.
When you make love, your partner does the same thing, whether or not you are enjoying it.

While situations vary among couples, there are some similarities. The relationship is becoming monotonous and the spark is dying. Before your connection with your partner gets damaged any further, try the following.

Celebrate “His” Day

Once a month, you can designate a day when he can become king for 24 hours. Do it in “his-and-hers” fashion to be fair. On his special day, he can have an erotic massage, be served breakfast in bed and be the passive partner during sex. The same should apply when it’s your turn. You may want to wait until his birthday comes around before you do something special. With this gesture, you can make sure that you remind your partner that you’re a couple every once in a while.

Celebrate Your Anniversary – By The Month

This may seem corny (and often, expensive), but reminding each other how long you have been together may help you both understand that you’re in it for the long haul. Also, remembering that times when you were still dating may help improve your romance and how you treat each other. Bake a cake or bring home something special during that day. Make sure it’s something you don’t usually do. If he’s into pasta, make a full-course dinner with pasta as the main dish. If he’s into grilling, you can prepare a week in advance and plan a grill-fest on your month anniversary.

Kinky Thoughts

When you’re just lazing about on a weekend night and relaxing together, you can talk to him about your sex fantasies. Tell him what turns you on, and if he doesn’t take the hint, load the video that got you turned on so he can see for himself.

A perverted train of thought is usually associated with males, which makes it a surprising novelty when the woman starts showing signs of being kinky. But remember to act on your fantasies as soon as you mention them. Talking is the way to begin a kinky night of fantasizing with your partner. But you have to act on one of your fantasies that night, or the gesture is wasted. Simply saying “let’s try it” will get him going.

Encourage Him To Talk Dirty

Sometimes, men are hesitant to talk dirty during sex for fear of offending the woman. This hesitation is present whether or not you’re married. What you can do is to encourage him to talk sexy to you, just to push him in the right direction. After that, you can reciprocate and talk in the same manner to let him know you’re ok with dirty talk.

The Secret to Lasting Love – Better Than Flowers And Chocolate

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 06 Sep 2010 14:00:42 +0000

After you’ve been together for a while and the initial euphoria wears off, it’s easy to keep finding faults and to focus on the problems and bumps and forget the wonderful things that made you fall in love in the first place. Here’s the best way to keep the love and romance alive in your relationship, no flowers or chocolate required!

Gratitude Journal

When things get rough in your relationship, it’s important to remember what made you first fall in love with your partner. Chances are, the reasons you love your partner are still the reasons you love your partner but day to day stresses have just gotten in the way. It’s easy to focus on little annoyances when things aren’t going your way and this can often put a lot of strain on the relationship. Instead of going over and over why you’re mad at your partner or what they’re doing that really irks you, try focusing on what you love about your partner. Start a gratitude journal. Every day, write down five things that you love about your partner, or that made you fall in love with them in the beginning. Do this for thirty days and you’ll find that all those little annoyances aren’t such a big deal anymore and its easier to remember why your partner is important to you.

Create A LoveBook

A LoveBook is a great option for putting your gratitude journal into something you can give as a great gift and keep for years to come. Sign up for a free account online and start making your LoveBook right away. Pick between a hard or soft cover and choose your cover art. Then, pick from pre-made pages of things you love about your partner or create your very own page. Each page has an illustration on it to help bring the book to life. Once you’re finished putting it all together, order your LoveBook and have it sent to your home. Now you have something to look back on when you’re feeling frustrated in your relationship or give as a perfect romantic gift for birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s Day or just because.

LoveBook Gift Ideas

A LoveBook is a great gift for your husband, wife, girlfriend, boyfriend or partner. This is originally what the LoveBook was designed for, and you simply can’t get any more personal or original with your gift. Forget the bland “flowers-and-chocolate-or-dinner-reservations” gifts and get your partner something really special instead. LoveBooks also make great gifts for parents and grandparents to let them know how thankful you are and how much you appreciate them in your life. Make a LoveBook for your child on their birthday or on any day to let them know all the reasons you think they’re a stellar kid and why you’re proud of them. If you use your imagination, you can give a LoveBook to just about anyone and let them know why they’re important to you and why they’re a big part of your life! Of course, giving a LoveBook to your partner is super special, and it’s so easy you can make one every year to let them know how your love for them continues to grow and grow.

3 Love Making Tips To Blow Her Mind

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 10 Jul 2010 14:00:59 +0000

An often overlooked but extremely powerful tool in your sexual arsenal can be the ability to “make love” to a woman in a sensuous, passionate and romantic way. Many women love dirty, raunchy and kinky sex, but they also enjoy romance and sensuality every now and then. Do you want to know how to blow your partner’s mind when you make love to her? Here’s how you can do it.

Romance During Sex

Don’t just whisper dirty words in her ear or tell her how good it feels. While talking dirty to her is a great way to spice up your sex life with your partner, she doesn’t always want to hear a string of moans, grunts and four letter words when having sex with you. Instead, mix it up and tell her how much you love her and enjoy being with her sexually. Connect with her emotionally, and say romantic things to her while you’re having making love to her. Tell her how good she looks without her clothes on and how beautiful you think she is. Compliment her, and find specific things to compliment such as how soft her lips are or how special she makes you feel when you’re making love with each other.

Hold Eye Contact During Sex

Actions speak louder than words most of the time, and eye contact with your partner during sex says more than words ever could. Look at her when she’s going down on you and hold her gaze for a few moments before rolling your head back and sighing with pleasure. When you’re on top, take a few minutes to go slow and kiss her neck after looking into her eyes for a moment or two. Eye contact will help you and your partner feel emotionally connected to each other. For women, a big part of sexual satisfaction comes from emotional intimacy. It can be very difficult for a woman to open up sexually without some kind of emotional connection. You’ll be surprised at how well she responds sexually to you after you’ve given her just a few minutes of emotional fulfillment!

Pay Attention To Her After Sex

Many women feel that men are notorious for rolling over and going to sleep right after sex. Most women hate this! It makes them feel as though they were used and are being discarded after you’ve “got yours.” These feelings are made worse if you have not taken the time to pleasure your partner and give her a satisfying orgasm. This will certainly diminish your chances of having sex with your partner again, and if you do have sex with her again, you’ve definitely blown your chances of getting your partner to open up to you sexually and have a great orgasm. Spend a few minutes cuddling your woman after sex, stroking her thighs and kissing her neck. Let her know how good it was for you! Don’t just roll over and go to sleep or get up and take a shower right away. If you must have a shower, let your partner take one with you and spend a few minutes just reveling in after sex bliss!

How To Tell Her You Love Her – 5 Romantic Ideas

Lee Jenkins — Mon, 28 Jun 2010 23:00:15 +0000

Getting the attention of a beautiful girl is easy, but maintaining that level of attention is difficult. If you think you’ve “got her” when she agrees to date you, think again. A woman’s mind can change rather quickly if the man she’s with is not emotionally available. If you want to enjoy a lasting relationship with a woman, you need to get her to think of you in a more romantic way.

Whatever you do, you shouldn’t be complacent when it comes to dating. Most men realize this and they do what they can to be more romantic, but unfortunately, the women won’t recognize their efforts. It’s not always because the men are doing it wrong. It may be because the woman expects something more.

Your mission is to make her think of you as the most romantic guy ever, and here are 5 ways to do that.

Do Her Chores

Making life easy for your girl is one sign that you love her, and she will feel this too. Once a week, make it a point to give your girl a day off by taking charge of chores while she does her nails or while she visits a salon for a makeover.

Flowers

You often hear that girls think it’s sweet when men give them flowers for birthdays and valentines, right? You know what’s sweeter? It’s giving flowers when there’s no special occasion to celebrate. On any ordinary day, give her a few stalks of her favorite flowers. Women are conditioned to like this gesture from their childhood, so you can’t go wrong with this one.

Dinner

Even the modern woman feels all warm and fuzzy when a man pays for her meal. It’s just an instinct that all women share. Take your girl out, go to her favorite restaurant and snack together on her favorite dishes whenever you can.

Travel Together

Whether it’s just the next state or a neighboring country, make sure you spend some time with your girl travelling to another place for a change of scene. Being stuck in one place can be uncomfortable, not to mention boring. Make sure you ask your girl where she wants to go, and which activities she wants to try in another place before making your plans.

Sex

Love making is the ultimate way to express your feelings to her. Set it up nicely with a good bubble bath, scented candles and aromatic oils. When she’s relaxed, you can proceed with erotic massage. Be patient and make her feel that it’s her night and you’re her sex slave for the night.

Go for kinky sex! If your girl is usually submissive during sex, turn the tables on her and let her dominate you for one night. However, be sure to give her guidance and instructions (like what the leather whip is for), or offer suggestions on how to role play as a dominatrix.

Have A Snowed In Affair With Your Own Partner

Dr. Bonnie Eaker Weil — Wed, 17 Feb 2010 21:00:20 +0000

Many of us – myself included! – have been snowed in the past couple days, thanks to extreme weather hitting many parts of the US. While not being able to get to your scheduled appointments – like work, school, meetings, etc – can be stressful, why not put the time to good use and use the mandatory down-time to rekindle a spark with your significant other?! Just because it’s cold outside doesn’t mean you can’t heat it up indoors! Here are a few of the things I recommend to have a snowed-in affair, take advantage of the blizzard and get back to basics!

Hot Ideas For When It’s Cold Outside

Mix up a hot drink and then cozy up with each other. Whether it’s hot chocolate or hot toddy, getting warm together doesn’t HAVE to involve sex! Start out with something simple like a drink to warm you up and snuggle up together by reading a book, playing a game, or beginning a project you’ve been putting off.
Let it lead to sex. Studies show that during big storms people usually make love, make babies or fight. Starting by reconnecting with something simple (a book, a game, etc.), as I mentioned above, can lead to a more intimate conclusion. Take advantage of the fact that you don’t have anywhere to be! If you’re like most of us, this will likely be one of the few times when Mother Nature forces you to slow down and simplify! Make the most of your time indoors, since there’s nowhere else you could be, even if you wanted to. Instead of letting your obligations stress you out, let go of your responsibilities by having an affair with your own partner. I mention this technique in my book, Make up Don’t Break up, where I give couples tools for rekindling romance.
Get outside. That’s right - it’s cold and snowy and you don’t have to go anywhere so why not relive the excitement that snowdays gave you as a kid?! These types of opportunities often bring out our inner child, so go with it, get playful and see where it leads. You may learn something new about your partner, discover something new you can do together (who doesn’t love making snowmen?), and if nothing else, have a good time goofing around together.
Recreate the chemicals you experienced when you first fell in love. Take this opportunity to give a 30 second kiss and/or 20 second hug so you can fall back in love with your partner for Valentines Day during this snow-in.

I talk more about ways to fall in love and stay in love – no matter what the weather – in my book, Make Up Don’t Break Up!

How Aromatherapy Can Improve Your Sex Life

Kaylen Jackson — Mon, 15 Feb 2010 14:00:11 +0000

We’ve all lit the vanilla candles before sex to help create a romantic mood – but can other scents help turn you or your partner on even more? Science shows that aromatherapy really does work and that bringing different smells into the bedroom can instantly turn “blah” sex into “wow” sex. Here’s how you can use scents and aromatherapy to improve your sex life.

Sexual Benefits Of Aromatherapy

Aromatherapy has proven over decades to be a powerful way to stimulate parts of the brain that are related to sex and sensuality through our sense of smell. Aromatherapy is a great way to spice up your sex life if it is lacking, or simply enrich an already fantastic sex life. Many aromatherapy studies have shown that using scents can actually improve arousal and blood flow to both men’s and women’s genitals. While most scents increase blood flow to a man’s penis, only certain scents incrase blood flow to a woman’s vaginal area. Other scents were actually proven to turn a woman off, including the scents of barbeque and men’s cologne. In addition to the purely physical benefits of scents in the bedroom, scents that elevate the mood and make you feel good will also help stimulate your mind for sex. Many scents are proven to increase certain hormones in the body that are related to love and sex, making a man or woman feel more inclined to be more sensual and sexy in the bedroom.

Scents That Will Turn Your Partner On

The most powerful scents to use for a man are suprisingly lavender and pumpkin pie. These smells were shown to actually increase the blood flow to a man’s genitals up to 40% and put him in the mood for sex. If you want to really set the mood for your man, burn a few pumpkin pie or lavender candles for a few hours before making your move. Pumpkin pie is a great scent for warm, cozy winter sex and cuddling while lavender is a great spring and summer scent. A woman, however, will respond best to the smell of licorice. Licorice is a great scent to use in the bedroom because while it is the most potent scent for a woman’s arousal, it will also affect a man’s arousal in a positive way as well.

Essential Oils

For hundreds of years, aromatherapy has incorporated powerful essential oils during sex. Many varieties of essential oils are used in sensual massage oils and can help relax your partner and put them in a more sexual frame of mind when used in conjunction with a fantastic massage. The scents of rose, patchouli, ylang ylang and jasmine are all scents that are easy to find and extremely effective in setting a romantic and sensual mood for sex. While most essential oils are diluted when used in massage oils, undiluted essential oils can be used sparingly on a cotton ball or in a warming dish and set next to your bed to help diffuse the scent throughout the entire room. Aromatherapy is more powerful when used for a few minutes or hours prior to having sex to allow the body to respond to the scents that are being used.

Mirroring – Discover This Little Known 1st Date Secret

Victorya Rogers — Wed, 10 Dec 2008 13:12:59 +0000

Going on a first date can be intimidating, no matter how long you’ve been on the dating scene. Fortunately, there are a few ways you can ensure first date success.

One of the most successful ways to hit it off with someone on a first date is using a technique called “mirroring.”

Mirroring is a technique that you can use to help your date feel comfortable with you almost instantly so you can focus on getting to know them.

What is mirroring?

Mirroring is actually something that good friends and couples do naturally. For example, if you’re at dinner with a friend and they lean further towards the table, you might unconsciously do the same.

If you’re sitting in a theater watching a movie and you cross your legs, your boyfriend or husband might cross his legs too. When you’re comfortable with someone, you will naturally mirror their body language and movements and they’ll naturally mirror yours.

How can you use mirroring to your advantage on a first date?

Naturally, you’re not going to instantly and unconsciously mirror someone on a first date and it’s unlikely that they’ll mirror you. This could be a reason why first dates are often so awkward! However, you can use your understanding of the mirroring technique to make the first date jitters a little easier to handle and help make your date feel more comfortable with you.

When you’re on a first date, pay special attention to your date’s body language. You want to try to mirror them in a way that looks unconscious by you, like natural mirroring, without looking strange or suspicious.

This might take a few tries to really get down pat, so it’s helpful if you try to practice your mirroring technique with friends first. They can give you input on how your mirroring looks to someone besides yourself.

Using mirroring from now on

Once you feel comfortable consciously using mirroring as a technique, you can utilize it on your first date and even second or third dates if you need to. Eventually, if you and your new date become close, mirroring will become second nature to you, as it is with your current friends and family.

When on a date, try mirroring your date’s body language. If they rest their hand in their chin while listening to you, try resting your hand in your chin while listening to them.

How can mirroring help make a first date more comfortable?

The subconscious mind picks up mirroring and sees it as a sign of comfort and connectedness. When you mirror your date’s body language and their subconscious mind picks it up, they’ll automatically feel connected to you.

They’ll instantly want to get to know you better and will feel like they’ve “hit it off” with you. This gives you a chance to really evaluate if you’ve hit it off with them, and can make your entire dating experience better in the long run.

If you learn to use mirroring as a way to help ease some of the tension on first dates and help your date to feel connected to you, you’ll have more positive relationships. Even if the dating doesn’t work out, it’s likely that you’ll develop lots of friends in the process and avoid building up your arsenal of dreaded first date horror stories!

10 Romantic Tips to Make Any Woman Happy

Maia Berens — Tue, 04 Nov 2008 01:20:30 +0000

Dictionary.com defines romantic as “displaying or expressing love or strong affection”. The media pushes flowers, dinners, vacations and expensive jewelry as ways to be romantic with a woman.

I have a different view of what’s romantic and I suspect any woman in a relationship for any length of time would agree. Of course, flowers, dinners, vacations and jewelry are lovely but they don’t necessarily speak to women’s three most primary needs in a relationship as described in John Gray’s Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus.

Having worked with John for many years and having become intimately knowledgeable with the Mars Venus concepts by virtue of my job, I had several aha! moments when I learned what they the three primary love needs were for a woman.

I am in total agreement with John Gray that women need most to be cared about, understood and respected. He suggests that “when a man responds to a woman in a way that acknowledges and prioritizes her rights, wishes and needs, she feels respected”.

A man can not care, not try to understand and not respect a woman at all, and still buy flowers and think that’s romantic. It won’t cut it, guys. So, following are 10 romantic tips in no particular order of importance that will make any woman happy and show her that you care, that you try to understand her and that you acknowledge and make important her rights, wishes and needs.

Remember to do the things you promised to do – without being reminded.

When my husband remembers that he promised to fix the blinds on the weekend and goes to Home Depot to buy what he needs, comes home and fixes the blinds just as he said, I feel this as an expression of love and caring. He knows that I like the house to look nice and things to work; I feel he understands and respects my desire to have it so.

Surprise her with something you know she wants – big or small.

This is such a big deal to me that I still remember when my ex-husband came home from work one day when I was pregnant with my first child 42 years ago with a balsa wood model airplane because I had said sometime in the past that I never had one.

I remember it as perhaps the sweetest, most romantic thing he ever did for me in the 19 years we were together. He occasionally brought me flowers but it didn’t make up for all his bad, uncaring, disrespectful behavior during the relationship.

Care about how she dresses.

My husband cares about what I wear, not from a critical or fault-finding perspective, but rather from an honest, loving interest in how I want to look and how I can look my best. It’s not about a compliment although heartfelt compliments are nice.

It’s that he knows that how I look is important to me and he cares to honor that. The way he makes me feel special and complimented is by telling me that how I look will make other men envy him.

Notice when she gets a haircut or changes her hairstyle.

I love that my husband always notices when I change my hair. It means he is really seeing me and paying attention not just used to me and making me become part of his exterior flow of things seen but not noticed like how the neighborhood looks.

Choose to spend time with her when she needs to do mundane things and you could be doing something more important or more fun.

When I do errands on the weekend, my husband often comes with me just because he says spending time with me is an adventure. I love that! I enjoy his company and even feel cared about. He could easily stay home and correct his student’s papers but instead he chooses time with me.

Pay attention to anything she creates – from cookies to a book she may write.

I feel so seen and important when my husbands listens to or reads everything I write. And I write a lot. I feel like I am the best, most creative person he ever met – and it feels good. And, he even was excited about the quiche I made a few weeks ago.

Look her in the eyes and tell her what inner qualities you love about her.

Oh, she likes to hear you think she’s hot, but watch her light up when you tell her you love how she always seems to attract the nicest friends or she is the best mother or you can’t get over how organized she is in all the family paperwork and even in her thinking.

Join her – even a bit – on her quests for self-improvement whether it’s a diet or exercise program or a self-help journey.

When I want to lose some weight and I give up half and half in my coffee and my husband joins me in doing that even though he doesn’t need to lose any, I feel his support for what I’m doing and I know he wouldn’t want to have something I particularly love, when I am choosing to forgo it.

Make her feel that you would rather spend time with her than anyone else.

Need I say more?

Show care and concern for those she loves, too.

I happen to have four adult children, their three partners and two grandchildren in my family. When my husband keeps saying how much he wishes my daughter didn’t move out of our neighborhood, it’s hard to explain how I feel. It’s a complex feeling made up of love, appreciation and shades of many other things.

Which leads me to tell you that when you do these 10 romantic things for her, the benefits to you will be beyond your wildest dreams.

Avoid These 5 Marriage Proposal Mistakes That Leave Women Feeling Disappointed

Michael Webb — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 21:45:18 +0000

Did you know that a man once hospitalized his girlfriend trying to propose to her?

It’s true! He slipped the engagement ring into her shot glass and as they toasted to his speech, she swallowed it! Now, she survived, but they did need a trip to the emergency room.

In fact, it’s ‘embarrassing yet funny’ proposals like these that remind me of the 5 ways that guys totally DESTROY this precious moment for women by making horrendous mistakes. Please don’t make these mistakes…

1. CREATING A PUBLIC SPECTACLE

Whether it’s a party, family get-together or Yankee game, realize that you should never propose to your beloved if she wouldn’t feel comfortable with a public proposal.

Not only may it embarrass her, but she may feel pressured to say “Yes,” only to tell you the truth later. Bottom line, think about what sort of person your lady is: Is she shy, cautious or a little reserved? Then maybe a private proposal is the better way to go.

2. “OVER-DOING” THE PROPOSAL

Some men’s idea of an amazing proposal is slapping together all the “usual” romantic things into one big event and calling it a “marriage proposal.” Sadly, this couldn’t be further from the truth. For example: A man serves the candlelit dinner, presents her flowers, chocolates, a teddy bear and then proposes to her.

Yuck. I’m sorry, but if you believe your lady deserves the most magnificent experience of her life, then understand that normal “everyday romance” is only good for… everyday romance! not a proposal. She’ll never admit it, but she’ll most likely be disappointed.

3. BEING UNPREPARED

You usually only get one shot at your proposal so you MUST get it right! No pressure . Always rehearse through the things that could go wrong, create backup plans and please make sure your proposal idea is safe! If you’re creating a more elaborate proposal, you’ll need extra caution.

Physically rehearse through the situations, discover what could go wrong and work out solutions around them. Get your friends together and brainstorm the sticky situations that could come up on the day. Of course, life is unpredictable and things may change but be prepared the best you can.

4. SPENDING TOO MUCH MONEY

Hang on! You’re probably wondering, “How is spending TOO MUCH money on a proposal a problem?” Well it all depends. The problem with money is that it often becomes a substitute for creativity. As a result, you get a “nice” memorable proposal but nothing that’s “jaw-dropping!”

5. USING A “DONE TO DEATH” PROPOSAL IDEA

Now here’s the biggest mistake of them all. Yes, coming up with creative and original ideas to propose is tough, but it’s a must if you want your moment to be remembered and talked about for years to come!

Your proposal needs to be personalized to your girlfriend. What are her favorite hobbies, music and interests? These are the starting points to an incredible proposal that everyone will talk about for years.

While the Eiffel tower, hot air balloons and getting the waiter to bring out the ring on a platter are “okay” ideas, they’re not creative and original enough for the most important and memorable moment of both your lives.

5 First Date Mistakes Men Make That End In Heartbreak – And How You Can Avoid Them

Michael Webb — Tue, 26 Feb 2008 14:52:48 +0000

Let’s face it you never get a second chance to make a first impression!

That’s why, if you want to take things further with a woman, you need to show her your best on the very first date.

And in actual fact, there are 5 things that men consistently do on first dates that totally destroy their chances of seeing the woman again, and the worst part is they think they’re doing it right!

Avoid the following 5 mistakes to increase your chances of fun and creative date ideas:

Mistake #1: Buying gifts

Bringing chocolate or flowers on a first date isn’t the best idea – especially if you’ve just met the woman! She’s there to get to know YOU. Women are always asking themselves “what does THAT mean?” And in this case it’s, “He bought me flowers because he likes me, but he doesn’t even know anything about me yet! A little suspicious.

Mistake #2: Being Mr. Serious

When in the presence of a potential date, men often become boring, instead of keeping up the friendly vibe they have with their friends. They won’t make jokes or laugh with the woman, they won’t play around like they do with their friends and they generally take things a little too seriously.

Why do men change their behavior around women, often without even realizing they’re doing it? Because they fear losing their only chance with the girl of their dreams, they try and play the safe side, which results in a “Mr. Serious.”

Mistake #3: Conducting an Interview

When men become “Mr. Serious” they often fall into “job interview conversation mode.” Make sure you reserve questions like, “So where do you work?” or “How many brothers and sisters do you have?” for the future, after you’ve already had a lot of fun and made the sparks fly. Instead, talk about your hobbies, interesting stories and fun stuff.

Avoid anything too deep for a long period of time. On a first date, it can make things a little depressing. Talk like you’ve known each other for years (as if you don’t need to do the awkward 20-questions quiz.) Of course you can ask basic questions, but never make it the main focus of your date. Focus on fun.

Mistake #4: Being too needy and direct

Without realizing it, many guys turn their dates off by trying a little too hard. For example: Men will lean into a woman’s personal space, and ask, “so do you like me?” or constantly change his opinion to seek her approval and make her like him. Big mistake.

Ironically, it’s leaning back, staying cool and calm, being a little cheeky, interesting, mysterious and comfortable with yourself that actually gets a woman’s attention and keeps her interested.

Mistake #5: Going to boring places

If your date finds the night boring, you’re finished. When it comes to having fun on first dates, nothing is more important than what you do. And while dinners and movies are nice, it’s really hard to leave a great impression in these settings. Why? Because they set a very “proper tone” that’s hard to turn into fun and playful.

And unless you’re a super funny, intelligent and interesting guy, dinner and movie dates just aren’t the best place to take your date. Instead, go to fun places like mini-golf parks, carnivals, parks, or even better, come up with your own unique and fun ideas.

So in essence, while there are many factors to having a successful date, a great date idea really helps you do many of them naturally! Remember, where you take a woman on a first date can be the difference between a great night and a dating disaster! Choose wisely!

How to Use Modern Technology to Add Old-Fashioned Romance to Your Relationship

Romance Tracker — Fri, 16 Nov 2007 14:15:13 +0000

So, when’s the last time you used modern technology to share your romantic feelings with your significant other?

The advent of the Internet, cell phones and hundreds of other modern communication tools has indeed made our world a bit more impersonal and fostered an expectation of immediate self-gratification among a new generation.

And as I mention repeatedly on my blog, Romance Tracker, old-fashioned romance is all about patience, subtlety and good communication.

Gone are the days when lovers used pen and ink to write each other careful letters declaring their affection. Modern lovers no longer have the patience to wait for a message to be delivered by post, nor should they have to.

It’s understandable that many of my readers are surprised when I tell them that modern technology, with all of its instant gratification and impersonal attributes, does not spell the end of classic romanticism in the world. Like anything else, modern technology, if used correctly, can indeed make your marriage or relationship more fulfilling and romantic.

I’m going to give you a few examples of modern communication tools that can be used to add more romance to your relationship everyday, but they are by no means the only examples. If you’re a modern-day old-fashioned romantic, be willing to experiment with new technologies to make your relationship more exciting and fulfilling for you and your lover. Continuing to utilize subtle, patient, old-fashioned methods of declaring your love is fine, but toss in some modern technology every now and then to add a fun twist to your relationship.

Romantic Text Messages and SMS

If used sparingly and not overdone, text messaging can increase the amount of positive communication between lovers by allowing them to express spur-of-the-moment feelings that they wouldn’t be able to otherwise. If you have a sudden romantic thought while at work but are lacking the privacy to call your significant other on the phone, text messaging will let you send a short, private note that will reach them instantly.

Romantic Instant Messages

Instant messaging is becoming more and more popular as a way for two people at separate computers to communicate with each other and send notes back and forth instantly. Instant messaging provides a much more in-depth, conversation-like medium for lovers than does text messaging. And instant messaging may actually improve your communication with your lover, because it allows you to share thoughts that might be more difficult face-to-face due to body language, visual or auditory baggage.

Romantic Emails

From fun e-cards to lengthy online love letters, email has provided lovers with a new way to communicate with their sweethearts instantly. A spontaneous romantic email is a simple, effective way to show your significant other that you are thinking of them no matter where you are. And with the ability to attach images, video and music, email has taken the old-fashioned love letter into a whole new realm.

Phil Van Treuren is a professional writer and web entrepreneur from the Cleveland, Ohio area. You can read more of his thoughts on love and romance on his blog, Romance Tracker. Phil is also the webmaster of Contest Blogger, a site for online contests and sweepstakes.

Swinging vs. Polyamory – Am I Wrong to Want One Without the Other?

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 25 Apr 2007 00:35:16 +0000

So you’ve been enjoying the swinging lifestyle for a few years, and are having a blast.

But what if it starts growing into more than just sex with friends – or friends with benefits?

What if your husband or wife starts developing romantic (a.k.a. love) feelings for your playmates?

Dare we call it polyamory?

"Polyamory is the practice of having more than one loving relationship at the same time, with the full knowledge and consent of all partners involved. The relationships are long-term, intimate, and usually (but not necessarily) sexual. Persons who consider themselves emotionally suited to such relationships may define themselves as polyamorous, often abbreviated to poly."
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory

"Swinging, sometimes referred to in North America as the swinging lifestyle, is non-monogamous sexual activity, treated much like any other social activity, that can be experienced as a couple. Swinging has been called wife swapping in the past, but this term is archaic and does not accurately describe the full range of sexual activities in which swingers may take part."

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Swinging

And what happens when the jealousy beast rears it’s ugly head. Admittedly swingers (and certainly those into polyamory) are not nearly as apt to fits of jealousy as some monogamous couples, but it’s been known to happen…

What happens when one partner wants a polyamorous relationship and the other one doesn’t? Is it wrong to want one without the other?

No, it’s absolutely not wrong. What you want is what you want. What you feel and what you want is what’s right for you and for your life. Period.

The swinging lifestyle is typically about sex!

You get together, you play, and then you go home. That’s kind of what it’s about. But Polyamory takes it to a new level and, what I would consider, a much more enlightened level where you are actually in love relationships with multiple partners. It’s a true and total sharing of one another and not many couples (or individuals) are able to do that.

It all comes down to communication.

It’s critical to ask your partner how they feel and to share your feelings. The absolute worst thing that you can do is to hold your feelings inside – what you really want – because you’re afraid your partner may not understand. You have to talk about what you both want from the relationship and what boundaries you’re comfortable with. And in some circumstances, you may find out that you want different things. If this is the case, you’ll have to decide if you are willing to compromise or go your separate ways.

Jealousy

The biggest reason why many people feel uncomfortable in a Swinging or Polyamorous relationship is "jealousy". It’s one of the biggest emotional issues that all couples face. And when you start bringing other people into your bedroom, you simply cannot let jealousy sneak into the picture because it will tear your relationship apart.

So you have to find ways to make each other feel really special and absolutely certain about where you stand in your own relationship before sharing intimate fun with others.

That’s the biggest thing in the end. Talk! Share your feelings!

Oh, and if you think swinging or polyamory are a rare occurrence in our society, think again!

Check out this survey that over 4,000 of our readers took – Sex Poll: Would You Consider Swinging or Polyamory? The results will certainly surprise you.

Swinging vs Polyamory – Can You REALLY Have One Without the Other?

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 12 Apr 2007 17:12:50 +0000

So you’ve been enjoying the swinging lifestyle for a few years, and are having a blast.

But what if it starts growing into more than just sex with friends – or friends with benefits? What if your husband or wife starts developing romantic (a.k.a. love) feelings for your playmates? Dare we call it polyamory?

Oh, and if you think swinging or polyamory are a rare occurrence in our society, think again! Check out this survey that over 4,000 of our readers took – Sex Poll: Would You Consider Swinging or Polyamory? The results will certainly surprise you.

So is it REALLY possible to have swinging without polyamory, and vice versa? Is it REALLY?

Check out this resource we recommend to help you find the right swinger and threesome partners fast:

Check out the largest swinger and sex personals dating site and find sex partners in your area today. They have millions of active members online, and 30,000 new photos uploaded daily.

How to Spice Up Your Sex Life and Save Your Relationship

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 07 Apr 2007 19:53:33 +0000

Here’s a common scenario…

My partner and I have been together for 2 years and we have been living together for about 4 months. Now that we are living together, we rarely have sex. We are becoming more like best friends and I’m scared the passion is fading.

I don’t want to lose my relationship but I don’t know if I have the will power to save it. What can I do?

Watch this short video to find out how you can spice up your sex life and bring back that spark you had in the beginning…

You’ll Definitely Want to Try These Fun and Creative Date Ideas

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 05 Apr 2007 00:00:53 +0000

Think back to your last date…

Now the one before that. Remember how much fun you had? Or did you?

Were you doing the same old thing you always do, each and every time you go out on Friday night? Does your partner still get excited at the thought of going out with you?

Or is it getting boring and sometimes not even worth the hassle? What a shame…

How about some really fun, memorable, and unique date ideas that’ll get you and your partner excited to go on a date again – together?

Or here’s another scenario…

You’ve met a really great man or woman and they’ve accepted your offer to go on the very first date with you. Wouldn’t it be nice to take them on a really fun and creative date that they’ll never forget rather then the same old dinner and a movie routine?

Be different and stand out.

Most people just go out to dinner at some fancy restaurant on their first few dates. But that’s just not very special or original. Your partner will appreciate that you actually came up with something creative and romantic.

If you want to stand out from the crowd, always strive to be yourself, to be different… Don’t go on the same dates everyone else goes on, and don’t copy what everyone else does. Do something exciting and memorable, and most importantly – have fun. Fun and happiness is extremely infections… people just can’t get enough.

Here’s our review of Oprah Love Expert Michael Webb’s excellent book 300 Creative Dates… In short, you’ll never run out of fun date ideas again.

Are restaurants becoming boring as date destinations? Check out all the types of dates you’re missing out on:

Unique TV/Movie Dates
Different Dinner Dates
Vacation Dates
Picnic Dates
Game Dates
Craft Dates
Sports/Outdoors Dates
Long Distance Dates

I’m sure you’ll be as excited as we were when we started flipping through the pages. Michael Webb has the best collection of date ideas and romance tips that we’ve ever seen in one place.

Here’s a sneak peek at the great date ideas you’ll find when you get 300 Creative Dates.

Instead of a lunch or dinner date, try a breakfast date.
Go for a night swim with candles floating in the pool.
Try making a gourmet meal together.
Rent a convertible for the day while the weather is still warm and take a ride to the beach, mountains or countryside.
Warm up the house in winter by baking several batches of cookies with your sweetheart to share with friends, family and coworkers.
Go through a gourmet grocery store sampling the items and buying something you have never tried before.
Spend an afternoon or evening in an art gallery and pretending you are professional art reviewers. Give each other a critique of several of the pieces.
Take your sweetheart on a tour of your old high school or college – pointing out all the special places.
Purchase coloring books and spend the evening coloring and talking about your childhoods.
Stay up all night and visit places that are open very late like Waffle House, Wal-Mart and dance clubs.
Make s’mores in your fireplace.
Attend a high tea.
Make an old fashioned root beer float and drink it with two straws.
Wash, blow dry and brush your lover’s hair.
Celebrate your sweetheart’s “half” birthday (six months after his or her real birthday).
Go to a nearby park with hiking trails.
Pretend you are without power and light up your place with candles and just talk for a change.

While we did find some of the dates to be a little cheesy, there are definitely a lot of great date ideas that are worth trying at least once and many that are worth trying more than once.

Download your copy right now before you get busy and forget. Surprise your partner with the best date they’ve had in a long time.

Michael Webb also includes some really great dating tips to help you make your creative dates a success instead of a flop. And he also tells you how to avoid some potentially devastating dating disasters.

There’s also a section with some great ideas for asking someone out. You know, breaking past those first awkward moment and making your fateful move!

You’ll definitely also want to check out Michael’s other terrific resources below.

One of our personal favorites is Lick by Lick.

Spice up your sex life with 500 Sex and Love Making Secrets (Read Our Review…)
Enjoy Lick by Lick – How to Go Down on a Woman and Have Her Begging for More (Read Our Review…)
Find out what you really need to know about your partner with 1000 Questions for Couples (Read Our Review…)

Don’t put it off. You’ll kick yourself if you don’t check out 300 Creative Dates today.

Here Are Some Great Ways to Get ‘Lucky’ in Love on St. Patrick’s Day

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 16 Mar 2007 17:00:32 +0000

So maybe you’ve never thought of St. Patrick’s Day as a romantic holiday…

Why not try something new this year and surprise your significant other with something a little more romantic than green beer.

We say that when you’re in love, the best way to stay in love and keep the spark in your relationship is to make every day a romantic holiday. So here are some great romantic ideas for this St. Patrick’s Day.

Get ‘Lucky’ in Love on St. Patrick’s Day

By: Amy Cunningham

St. Patty’s Day is no longer just for the Irish! Take the time to add a spark of romance and let that special someone know how truly ‘lucky’ you feel to have them in your life.

This is a common suggestion, but not many couples actually take advantage of it! Pack a picnic lunch, complete with a bottle of wine. Head out to your local park, snag a shady spot under a tree and prepare yourself for an afternoon of romance. After eating, have a little St. Patty’s Day fun by searching for four-leaf clovers in the grass. While it may sound cheesy at first, you’ll really feel the romantic sparks.
A perfect gift for the perfect lass! Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day deliciously with a gift box full of St. Patrick’s Day themed berries. These berries are lusciously dipped in dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white chocolate, almonds, chocolate chips, and green tinted coconut. It’s fun and romantic!
Rent a “lucky” movie and have a romantic night at home! Lucky Seven, starring Kimberly Williams-Paisley (from The Tenth Kingdom and Father of the Bride), is a great romantic comedy for St. Patrick’s Day. Amy’s (Williams-Paisley) mother dies when she is just 7 years old and leaves her with a timeline for her life, including the fact that she will have 6 boyfriends before she meets the 7th, who is “the one”. Everything in Amy’s life is perfect and she has followed the time line exactly until she meets the perfect guy. The problem is that he is guy number six. In order to keep her perfect time line in tact, Amy seeks out a temporary sixth boyfriend, the bagel guy. She is soon caught between the two men in a hilarious attempt to figure out her life and love.
It’s said that the four-leaf clover symbolizes wealth, fame, a faithful lover and good health. Pressed between two layers of glass, this genuine four-leaf clover is surrounded by a polished-aluminum frame and sturdy stand. There is no gift that is more perfect for your lucky love on St. Patrick’s Day than this framed genuine four-leaf clover.
Have your sweetie search for his/her own lucky pot o’ gold! You can fill a small pot with golden chocolate coins (found at most candy stores) and a love letter inside. You can either leave the pot o’gold out in the open for your sweetie to find or leave clues filled with romantic notions leading them to the end of their rainbow…
We all like to believe that good things come in threes, and we have the Irish to thank for this optimistic motto. The native shamrock with three leaves is said to represent love, valor and wit. Share your love with your lucky lady by giving her this gorgeous Shamrock bracelet.
Kiss me, I’m Irish! Even if you’re not Irish, fill your day with lots o’kisses! There’s nothing like a good make out session to spark the romance. Shake things up a bit and try out several different kisses. Check out our “gallery of kisses” submitted by other RomanceStuck visitors.
If you’re looking for something for the lucky man in your life, this plaid leather flask is the perfect gift. It’s not St. Pat’s without a little whiskey… or a little green. Throw in a set of double-walled beer glasses (as seen on NBC’s Today Show) for a little more St. Patty’s day fun.
Leave sexy love notes in your sweetie’s briefcase/purse with Hershey’s Golden Nugget candies attached. Make sure the notes leave sexy hints of the night to come! All you need for the perfect St. Patrick’s night is sexy green lingerie and a little bubbly.
Visit a local Irish pub for the evening. Most have special events on St. Patty’s Day, which is sure to guarantee a good time. Check your local newspaper or call your local pub to find out their schedule of events.

Is He Really Over His Ex-Girlfriend? How Do I Know for Sure?

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 09 Feb 2007 15:01:39 +0000

The Question:

I’ve been dating this guy for 3 years, and just found out from his ex-girlfriend that in the first year of us dating he was still sending her flowers, and making CDs of songs that made him think of her. She broke it off for good, and the last 2 years he has been with only me, but he has never gotten me flowers, or even made me a CD, and I don’t think I’d even want it. After finding out what he did the first year of our relationship, I feel like if she would have came running back into his arms he would have left me for her.

Now he tells me he only loves me and wants to be with only me, but as far has being romantic to me, that will never happen, for he did it in the past and it didn’t work, so I just have to love him for him, and not for what he did for her. But I’m like we have been together for 3 years now and you have never gotten me flowers or anything, and he told me it was something between them, and it would only bring up old memories. What do I do????? I love him so much, but all this really hurts bad… I need some good advice… please help me.

The Answer

This question leaves me with a few questions of my own – Is this really about the romance or the fact that you’re not sure if he’s truly over her? Maybe you feel that he doesn’t love you as much as her and that the ‘romance’ would prove his love to you? – Just a few questions to ponder…

It sounds like your boyfriend was not over his previous girlfriend when the two of you decided to get serious, but claims that he is now. This can be a tough one because he never really gave himself time to heal and let go of the previous break up which could result in him carrying around this baggage for a very long time.

Dealing with broken trust

Open communication and honesty are the two most important components of a successful relationship. You have to honestly know in your heart – If his ex-girlfriend called him up tomorrow, would he leave you for her.

He broke this trust at the beginning of your relationship. If he went around your back for a full year, then I’d be concerned about his commitment now. But only you can really gauge if he’s truly moved on.

However, let’s remember that 2 years have passed. People change, feelings, and emotions change. And they tend to change all of a sudden, when the time is right for each person. So while he may have been dishonest with you for a very long time, he may be perfectly committed to you now.

Open and honest communication from this point forward will be critical to the relationship – especially since the trust has already been broken once. Ask him how he honestly feels – you’ll have to be very careful to do this in a trusting, open, and non-threatening way. Otherwise, he’ll just shut down and not talk to you. You also have to be prepared for what you are going to hear – it may not be what you want or expect.

Listen to your heart

Down deep, you know if he’s really and truly devoted to you and shares your love fully. But the trick here is to listen to what’s really there in your heart, not what you want to hear.

Are you jealous of his ex girlfriend?

An important question here… Was romance important to you even before you found out about his affections toward his ex girlfriend?

It’s definitely OK to always grow and change (your mind, your thoughts, your beliefs), but be sure your desire for romantic gestures isn’t just out of jealousy over the ex girlfriend.

You know… “He did it for her, why not me?” That’s a very destructive path.

Identify your needs in the relationship

I don’t think it’s the flowers or CD’s you’re looking for. It’s the way these romantic gestures make you feel – special and desired; to know that he truly loves and desires you.

Understand that romance is a way of life. Not all men feel comfortable with romantic gestures because it really puts their heart on the line. Since he has been rejected before, it may even be more difficult for him.

One idea is to take the time to figure out the exact things that make you feel special and wanted. Sit together and make a list of the top 5 or 10 things that make you feel desired. Make the commitment to do these things for each other on a regular basis, no matter how big or small. Because you’re both a bit jaded in this area, be patient and non-judgmental with one another.

Another thing you can do is help him feel very secure in the relationship so that he will feel safe in making romantic gestures. Compliment him on the little things that he does do and let him know every day how important he is to you and how much you appreciate your relationship. The fastest way to change him is to change your perception of him. Every night before you go to bed write down everything that you like and appreciate about him and your relationship – before you know it, he’ll start giving you even more reasons to appreciate him. It may sound a little backwards, but this is a very powerful exercise.

Stay together or break up?

Different people come into our lives for one purpose or another. Our instinct is to stay with the same person forever because we’re afraid to move on, but sometimes that’s not truly the best answer for us.

Many times people grow apart in a relationship, and are no longer happy together. This is primarily because we’re always growing and changing. When a couple is not completely open and honest in their communication, they often grow in different directions emotionally, physically, and spiritually. When this happens, it may be necessary to move on. I’m not a believer in settling for second best or holding on to a failing relationship.

Spend some time in quiet contemplation or meditation. Ask God, the Universe, or whomever your higher power is, to help you make the right decision for you. If you listen – the answer will come to you. It’s up to you to act on the answer that you receive.

In Summary

The past is only a memory, the future is a dream. Only now is real. Live in the now!

As hard as it may be, you should let go of the past and forgive him for the broken trust in the beginning of the relationship whether you choose to continue the relationship or not. “Forgiveness is God’s gift to the forgiver, not the forgiven”.
Decide what’s truly important for you in a relationship and go after it, whether it’s with your current boyfriend or not. Don’t settle or hang on to your relationship for the wrong reasons.
Once your feelings and desires are clear to you, sit down and seriously discuss your wants and needs with your boyfriend.
If you desire a life of romance and your boyfriend isn’t able to provide it, then it may be time to move on.
In this case, I would seriously consider some couples counseling because there are so many issues that you are each dealing with, that you may not be able to get through them alone. An objective 3rd party can really help in a situation where you have so many delicate issues to talk about.

How to Spice Up Your Sex Life and Save Your Relationship

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 07 Feb 2007 03:11:44 +0000

The Question:

My partner and I have been together for 2 years now and we have been living together for about 4 months. Now that we are living together I feel that our relationship has changed. We hardly ever have sex, probably once a month is about all we manage to achieve.

I love sex and I’m sure that my partner does too, but for some reason we just can’t seem to make an effort to do the wild thing – one of us or both are always tired and sometimes it feels like we’re losing sexual compatibility; now it seems like I’ve had more passion in the past with other men or in the beginning of our relationship.

We do love each other and we’ve been through a lot together but I feel that our relationship is changing and I don’t know what to do about it.

We are becoming more like best friends everyday and I’m scared that the passion is fading. His idea of seduction and mine are totally different – he thinks ‘Let’s have sex?’ is an acceptable phrase into seducing a woman into hot sex, where as I would rather be pinned up against a wall without a word being said and so on…

When we weren’t living together our relationship was great; we did struggle a bit in the sex department but 3 times a week compared to once a month was a vast improvement.

Any advice you have considering this situation would be greatly appreciated. I don’t think I want to lose my relationship but I don’t know if I have the will power to save it – I don’t know what to do.

The Answer:

You might be surprised to learn that almost all long term relationships go through this ‘phase’ where everyone seems to get a little lazy. From my experience, it seems to happen somewhere between 18 months and 3 years into the relationship.

Here are some ideas that will help you make the best decision for you…

Does he know how you feel?

Open and honest communication is the most important component of any relationship.

Talk about it! Yes, with him, not with your girlfriends, not with anyone else. It’s absolutely amazing how many lovers simply don’t communicate openly and honestly with one another.

So many guys chat about their love live with their buddies, often as a way of bragging and showing off. And then they ask their guy friends if this or that sex idea would be ok. This is a bad idea for guys and girls. If you’re trying to figure out what sexual experiences to try out, talk with your lover not your buddies.

So, does he know that you crave hot spontaneous sex, or that you get excited by playing a little rough? Guess what, he might like that too! Or he might not, but you’ll never know if you don’t explore this topic together. And by the way, you’ll have a lot of fun and get a lot closer in the process.

Don’t hurt anyone’s feelings and check your ego at the door

It’s a strange thing, but sex partners often get their feelings hurt when one of them suggests trying something new, or doing something a little differently.

Get over it! The point of sex and intimacy is to enjoy each other and be happy together! Unless of course you’re focused solely on making babies – but that’s not the topic of this article…

Getting comfortable and killing your relationship

Complacency, also known as “getting comfortable” is the death knell of so many relationships, it may as well be a full blown epidemic. So many couples strive to “get comfortable”. What that means is they stop trying. And guess what… you stop trying, and your relationship dies. It’s that simple. The excitement and attraction dies, and your relationships becomes a project that you’re always fixing up. That’s no fun.

So how can you add that spice and excitement back into your relationship so that you’re not just lusting after those hot bodies at the gym?

Seduction as a game for lovers – the chase begins anew

The thrill of seduction doesn’t end when you get into a relationship. Why give up such a wonderful thing, even if you could?

Admit it, we enjoy the chase. I know I do and I’m at peace with it. And if you’re not chasing your lover, you’ll end up chasing someone else. We’re just wired that way. So let’s just accept that fact and use it to our advantage.

When was the last time you tried to seduce your partner? …

No, I’m not talking about coming home and saying “hey, let’s go have sex”. Blah! Boring!

I mean dressing up to look your best, wearing something sexy and feeling sexy.

Some of the best and most exciting sex is spontaneous sex, when you’re so wrapped up in the heat of the moment that you just can’t stop from ripping each other’s clothes off! Now that’s excitement. And doesn’t it sound more fun than “hey, let’s go have sex”?

Schedule hot sex dates

You go through the trouble of scheduling lunch and dinner appointments with just about everyone in your life. How about paying at least that much attention to your lover? Make time for that really steamy hot date, and plan accordingly. That way you’ll both be anticipating it all day, or all week.

Make a sex date box

Here’s a neat idea. Get together with your lover and each of you jot down a steamy date idea on a piece of paper and agree that each time you go on a hot steamy date, you’ll pick a card from your special sex date box.

Watch some erotic movies – together

Basic Instinct, Wild Orchid, 9 and 1/2 Weeks – it doesn’t have to be Playboy Porn, just something that gets you excited – trust me – he’ll get excited simply by you being excited.

Go out and buy some hot lingerie – together

What could be more exciting than shopping for hot lingerie together? By the time you’re done, you’ll be well in the mood for a hot sex date.

How about going to an adult toy store – together?

Maybe go visit an adult toy store together. Even if you don’t buy anything, you’re sure to have a lot of fun checking out all the merchandise.

Mix it up with some new sexual adventures

Doing the same old thing over and over again is bound to get boring. You wouldn’t watch the same TV show for the rest of your life, would you?

Try something different. Whether you’re up for a threesome or interested in the wild latex world of BDSM, the same idea applies.

Be open to new experiences. Venture out and keep it exciting.

In summary

Talk with your partner about sex. Really, make a date to sit down and go over it. Then resolve to always talk about it form then on.
Check your ego at the door. If your partner makes sex suggestions and you get defensive, then you’re missing the point completely. Get over it and put your partner first. You’ll be glad you did.
Don’t strive to get “comfortable” in a relationship. If you’re there, break out of it before you doom your relationship for good.
Bring the excitement of seduction and the chase back into your relationship – fast.
Actually schedule some hot sex dates with your partner. Really.
Keep it exciting with some new sexual adventures. Try new things. Open your mind and explore the entire world of sex possibilities.
For some fresh new sex ideas download Michael Webb’s 500 Lovemaking Tips & Secrets (Read our review here).

Is Shyness Keeping You From the Girl of Your Dreams?

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 05 Feb 2007 16:37:10 +0000

The Question:

There is this girl at my church that I think might like me. Every time I get a chance to say something to her I don’t because I’m really shy. What can I say or do to break the ice?

The Answer:

The challenge here is that you really like her and really want her to like you. And that’s the problem. That wanting translates into fear – fear of rejection, fear of failure, fear of being alone.

STOP! Let’s go through this together so you will be able to approach her with ease the next time you see her.

She’s a regular person, just like you

Don’t put her on a pedestal just because you like her. This is one of the biggest mistakes men make with women, which is why they strike out so often.

Remember, she’s a regular person, just like you. So, treat her that way. Be nice, friendly, and most of all, confident in yourself. You wouldn’t be shy talking to one of your guy friends or a girl that you have no interest in, right?

So treat her like that – just one of your friends.

Men and women aren’t nearly as different as we all like to believe. At the end of the day we’re all people with needs, feelings, hopes, dreams, etc. We all need friends, companionship, and so on.

How can you tell if she likes you?

When you talk with her, notice how you feel. Do you feel like you WANT her to like you, or do you feel that she DOES like you? Is there a strong surge of energy, a magical spark between the two of you? Down deep, you’ll know if she really likes you.

You can feel it. Trust your gut.

Warning. Many guys make a big deal about asking a girl if she likes them. Don’t ever do that. You’ll put her on the spot and she’ll have to choose without getting to know you first. It’s like deciding if you want to buy a car without ever sitting in it.

The key here is confidence and belief in you. Listen for what’s in your heart, not for what you want to be there. If you’re too nervous to even talk without stuttering, then you won’t be able to read your gut feelings. So it’s very important to get a grip on yourself and just relax.

What if she turns you down?…

Before you approach any woman, tell yourself that it’s perfectly OK if she doesn’t go out with you. Heck, it’s perfectly fine if she doesn’t like you at all. Your life will be no different than it is now, but you will have more experience in approaching women. That’s it.

Read this over and over until you get it: You have absolutely nothing to lose.

Lots of men get their egos crushed because a really hot girl won’t go out with them.

Well, guess what? Fact is there are hundreds of reasons why she may not want to go out with you – or with anyone else for that matter.

She could be in a committed relationship, could be a lesbian, could be grieving a loss of some sort, could be having her time of the month, could be having a bad day for any other number of reasons, etc.

Or, you simply may not be her type. And that’s OK too. Wouldn’t you agree that’s it’s better to know up front?

With all that put together, assuming that you are her type, you have a 20% chance (at best) of succeeding when you approach a woman. That’s life, deal with it. This bears repeating. At any given time, a woman may not be interested in any man whatsoever. Accept that and go on. It’s just a fact of life.

The key point here is not to take it personally and go hide in the closet. Follow your heart and approach all the women you feel attracted to. You will find one, or more, that you really click with. Have fun and don’t take life so seriously.

How to approach her – the magical ice breaker

Now that we’re past that, it’s time to actually move in. She’s not going to know you like her if she doesn’t know you exist. So let’s get on with it.

Simply go talk to her.

There’s no magic to it. Just go over there and make some small talk. Don’t be overly eager and don’t have a firm agenda. Just say hello and see what happens.

Let her feel you out.

Think of two dogs when they first meet – they growl a little and spend lots of time sniffing each other. People do the same thing really… it’s all about getting a feel for the other person. We like to think we’re more evolved than lower animals like dogs, but they actually have a lot to teach us. I’ve yet to ever meet a person that’s as pure at heart as a dog…

Ask her out – leaving the “Friend Zone”

At some point you’re going to have to make your move and depart the friend zone. Now, this may not be in the first minute or two, and maybe not even the first time you talk to her. The key here again is self confidence. You’ll also need a little patience.

Take your time and feel it out first. Don’t make her choose until you know she’s comfortable enough with you to give you a chance and you’re comfortable enough to take the chance.

Now, on the sex and physical attraction issue…

Most guys assume that men and women want drastically different things, and sex is something that’s to be won over from the woman – like a special gift. Wrong! That’s a very dangerous perspective which will leave you doing the sex thing all by yourself for a long time.

Many years ago my father gave me a bit of insight on this. He said “she wants it just as much as you do”. In my early teens that nugget didn’t really do much for me. But as I grew into an adult, that advice took on special meaning. It’s important to remember that women want and need companionship (and yes, even sex) just as much as men do.

Love yourself – guys read this section, it’s for you

Decide today to love and embrace yourself. Yes, even as a guy, you can still love and embrace who you are. In fact, guys are notorious for self loathing and not appreciating themselves.

Guess what?

As any good salesman will tell you, if you don’t believe in yourself and in what you’re selling, nobody’s going to buy from you. If you don’t love yourself and don’t think highly of yourself, nobody else will either. Guaranteed.

So get over the self punishing and self loathing and decide to change your life today. Yes, you.

Need some help going up to her or asking her out?

For advice on how to approach a woman and ask her out, let’s get some advice from some of the experts in the pick up and seduction community.

Download and read this helpful guide to approaching women:

Guy Gets Girl – a Pickup, Dating And Seduction Guide written for men… By a woman!

This guide will help you increase your confidence so you can approach women more easily and get better results.

A word of warning. Some of the advice from the seduction and approaching experts involves psychological and hypnosis tricks to get women to want you, to trust you, to open up to you, etc.

But always remember to be yourself, because while many of these tricks will get you that hot girl for the night, they won’t get you a real girlfriend. In the end she’s going to see you for who you really are and you’re better off getting her to like the real you from the beginning.

In summary

Don’t put her on a pedestal – treat her like a regular person.
Be nice, friendly, and open.
Approach her… Yes, you will have to do this eventually.
Talk to her about something, anything. It’s not about what you say; it’s how you say it.
Download the Guy Gets Girl guide for a confidence boost on approaching her and asking her out.
Now go for it! Onward – no fear.

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