Ask Dan and Jennifer » romantic ideas

Avoid These 5 Marriage Proposal Mistakes That Leave Women Feeling Disappointed

Michael Webb — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 21:45:18 +0000

Did you know that a man once hospitalized his girlfriend trying to propose to her?

It’s true! He slipped the engagement ring into her shot glass and as they toasted to his speech, she swallowed it! Now, she survived, but they did need a trip to the emergency room.

In fact, it’s ‘embarrassing yet funny’ proposals like these that remind me of the 5 ways that guys totally DESTROY this precious moment for women by making horrendous mistakes. Please don’t make these mistakes…

1. CREATING A PUBLIC SPECTACLE

Whether it’s a party, family get-together or Yankee game, realize that you should never propose to your beloved if she wouldn’t feel comfortable with a public proposal.

Not only may it embarrass her, but she may feel pressured to say "Yes," only to tell you the truth later. Bottom line, think about what sort of person your lady is: Is she shy, cautious or a little reserved? Then maybe a private proposal is the better way to go.

2. "OVER-DOING" THE PROPOSAL

Some men’s idea of an amazing proposal is slapping together all the “usual” romantic things into one big event and calling it a "marriage proposal." Sadly, this couldn’t be further from the truth. For example: A man serves the candlelit dinner, presents her flowers, chocolates, a teddy bear and then proposes to her.

Yuck. I’m sorry, but if you believe your lady deserves the most magnificent experience of her life, then understand that normal "everyday romance" is only good for… everyday romance! not a proposal. She’ll never admit it, but she’ll most likely be disappointed.

3. BEING UNPREPARED

You usually only get one shot at your proposal so you MUST get it right! No pressure . Always rehearse through the things that could go wrong, create backup plans and please make sure your proposal idea is safe! If you’re creating a more elaborate proposal, you’ll need extra caution.

Physically rehearse through the situations, discover what could go wrong and work out solutions around them. Get your friends together and brainstorm the sticky situations that could come up on the day. Of course, life is unpredictable and things may change but be prepared the best you can.

4. SPENDING TOO MUCH MONEY

Hang on! You’re probably wondering, “How is spending TOO MUCH money on a proposal a problem?” Well it all depends. The problem with money is that it often becomes a substitute for creativity. As a result, you get a "nice" memorable proposal but nothing that’s “jaw-dropping!”

5. USING A "DONE TO DEATH" PROPOSAL IDEA

Now here’s the biggest mistake of them all. Yes, coming up with creative and original ideas to propose is tough, but it’s a must if you want your moment to be remembered and talked about for years to come!

Your proposal needs to be personalized to your girlfriend. What are her favorite hobbies, music and interests? These are the starting points to an incredible proposal that everyone will talk about for years.

While the Eiffel tower, hot air balloons and getting the waiter to bring out the ring on a platter are "okay" ideas, they’re not creative and original enough for the most important and memorable moment of both your lives.

Michael Webb is the author of "The Romantic’ Guide To Popping The Question," a book filled with 101 Creative and Unique Marriage Proposals, hand-picked as award-winning stories from a total of 7,329 entries in his worldwide competition.To learn more, Download The Romantic’ Guide To Popping The Question.

10 Tips for Surviving Valentine’s Day Whether You’re Single or Attached

Natalie Lue — Thu, 07 Feb 2008 15:15:29 +0000

As the big day approaches, it’s easy to lose perspective and go into meltdown mode…

1. Remember that Valentine’s Day is ONE day out of a whole 365 days!

If you’re attached, keep yourself grounded in this reality and avoid making Valentine’s the tipping point of your relationship.

If you’re single, much as it might seem like the entire universe is celebrating their love on the 14th, they aren’t, and you can’t let your whole emotional world collapse. Love is something to be celebrated all year round.

2. Manage your expectations but most importantly communicate them.

Are you expecting the sun, moon, and the stars even though you’ve only been in your relationship for a short period of time? Does your partner dislike Valentine’s day and hasn’t previously lived up to your expectations?

I’m not suggesting that you remove the element of surprise or spontaneity, but if you’re the type of person that is likely to feel very disappointed if the day isn’t what you expect, it’s time to discuss your expectations so that you can 1) find out if they are realistic, 2) share your thoughts with your partner, and 3) free the both of you to have a day that you can enjoy.

3. Do not create drama or get stressed about it.

It’s supposed to be a celebration of love but it is very easy to ruin the lead up to it or the actual day.

Whether you are the type of person that resents Valentine’s day and feels inadvertently pressured by your partner or the commerciality of it, or whether you’re that person who lives for Valentine’s day and expects a big gesture, if the person you are with is at conflict with your outlook, you will find yourself in the very unpleasant drama zone.

4. Remember that you’ve saved some money and been spared the pain of scratchy underwear and other such tacky gifts.

It can be quite difficult to come up with something original and inspired for Valentine’s day and there aren’t many of us who haven’t had love dice, love cheques, cheap flowers from the petrol/gas station, furry handcuffs etc, never mind paying over the odds to be packed like sardines into a restaurant with a set menu.

It’s not about throwing the cash around if you are attached, and if you aren’t, pat the extra cash, or treat yourself to something nice.

5. Don’t go on a first date.

There is a lot of expectations and unnecessary pressure when you have a first date on Valentine’s. Be very careful of knee-jerking into a new relationship as we make some of our worst decisions when we’re insecure and desperate to avoid singledom.

6. If you’re single, embrace the day and spend it with those that you love most.

Some of my best night outs have been when I’ve been single on Valentine’s. If you’re not the type that can let the day pass without feeling a bit anxious, hang with your other single friends,

7. No drink dialing.

Do you want to wake up on the 15th with a banging headache and regrets that you’ve made a fool out of yourself calling your ex, or even worse, you’ve slept with them? No matter how horny or sentimental you get, wait till the next day to see if you still feel the same when you’re sober.

8. Don’t seek validation from the day.

If your relationship has issues, gritting your teeth and eeking all of the sentiment out of the day is going to be the equivalent of papering over the cracks of your relationship. Don’t rely on this day to make your relationship but certainly don’t use it as the sole reason to break your relationship either. Likewise if you’re single, don’t think that the absence of a mate or a date invalidates you.

9. Valentine’s day extends to self-love.

As Luther Vandross said “Love the one you’re with” and this time, that’s YOU. V-day spells a great time to evaluate where you are and what you want out of life and your relationships. If there is any overhang from the past, start to deal with it and get happy before you throw yourself back in the dating saddle.

10. Make an effort and small gestures all year round.

If you do this, Valentine’s day won’t feel like guzzling water for the first time after being lost in the desert for a year…

To learn more about Natalie Lue, visit http://www.baggagereclaim.co.uk.

How to Use Modern Technology to Add Old-Fashioned Romance to Your Relationship

Romance Tracker — Fri, 16 Nov 2007 14:15:13 +0000

So, when’s the last time you used modern technology to share your romantic feelings with your significant other?

The advent of the Internet, cell phones and hundreds of other modern communication tools has indeed made our world a bit more impersonal and fostered an expectation of immediate self-gratification among a new generation.

And as I mention repeatedly on my blog, Romance Tracker, old-fashioned romance is all about patience, subtlety and good communication.

Gone are the days when lovers used pen and ink to write each other careful letters declaring their affection. Modern lovers no longer have the patience to wait for a message to be delivered by post, nor should they have to.

It’s understandable that many of my readers are surprised when I tell them that modern technology, with all of its instant gratification and impersonal attributes, does not spell the end of classic romanticism in the world. Like anything else, modern technology, if used correctly, can indeed make your marriage or relationship more fulfilling and romantic.

I’m going to give you a few examples of modern communication tools that can be used to add more romance to your relationship everyday, but they are by no means the only examples. If you’re a modern-day old-fashioned romantic, be willing to experiment with new technologies to make your relationship more exciting and fulfilling for you and your lover. Continuing to utilize subtle, patient, old-fashioned methods of declaring your love is fine, but toss in some modern technology every now and then to add a fun twist to your relationship.

Romantic Text Messages and SMS

If used sparingly and not overdone, text messaging can increase the amount of positive communication between lovers by allowing them to express spur-of-the-moment feelings that they wouldn’t be able to otherwise. If you have a sudden romantic thought while at work but are lacking the privacy to call your significant other on the phone, text messaging will let you send a short, private note that will reach them instantly.

Romantic Instant Messages

Instant messaging is becoming more and more popular as a way for two people at separate computers to communicate with each other and send notes back and forth instantly. Instant messaging provides a much more in-depth, conversation-like medium for lovers than does text messaging. And instant messaging may actually improve your communication with your lover, because it allows you to share thoughts that might be more difficult face-to-face due to body language, visual or auditory baggage.

Romantic Emails

From fun e-cards to lengthy online love letters, email has provided lovers with a new way to communicate with their sweethearts instantly. A spontaneous romantic email is a simple, effective way to show your significant other that you are thinking of them no matter where you are. And with the ability to attach images, video and music, email has taken the old-fashioned love letter into a whole new realm.

Phil Van Treuren is a professional writer and web entrepreneur from the Cleveland, Ohio area. You can read more of his thoughts on love and romance on his blog, Romance Tracker. Phil is also the webmaster of Contest Blogger, a site for online contests and sweepstakes.

Here Are Some Great Ways to Get ‘Lucky’ in Love on St. Patrick’s Day

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 16 Mar 2007 17:00:32 +0000

So maybe you’ve never thought of St. Patrick’s Day as a romantic holiday…

Why not try something new this year and surprise your significant other with something a little more romantic than green beer.

We say that when you’re in love, the best way to stay in love and keep the spark in your relationship is to make every day a romantic holiday. So here are some great romantic ideas for this St. Patrick’s Day.

Get ‘Lucky’ in Love on St. Patrick’s Day

By: Amy Cunningham

St. Patty’s Day is no longer just for the Irish! Take the time to add a spark of romance and let that special someone know how truly ‘lucky’ you feel to have them in your life.

This is a common suggestion, but not many couples actually take advantage of it! Pack a picnic lunch, complete with a bottle of wine. Head out to your local park, snag a shady spot under a tree and prepare yourself for an afternoon of romance. After eating, have a little St. Patty’s Day fun by searching for four-leaf clovers in the grass. While it may sound cheesy at first, you’ll really feel the romantic sparks.
A perfect gift for the perfect lass! Celebrate St. Patrick’s Day deliciously with a gift box full of St. Patrick’s Day themed berries. These berries are lusciously dipped in dark chocolate, milk chocolate, white chocolate, almonds, chocolate chips, and green tinted coconut. It’s fun and romantic!
Rent a "lucky" movie and have a romantic night at home! Lucky Seven, starring Kimberly Williams-Paisley (from The Tenth Kingdom and Father of the Bride), is a great romantic comedy for St. Patrick’s Day. Amy’s (Williams-Paisley) mother dies when she is just 7 years old and leaves her with a timeline for her life, including the fact that she will have 6 boyfriends before she meets the 7th, who is "the one". Everything in Amy’s life is perfect and she has followed the time line exactly until she meets the perfect guy. The problem is that he is guy number six. In order to keep her perfect time line in tact, Amy seeks out a temporary sixth boyfriend, the bagel guy. She is soon caught between the two men in a hilarious attempt to figure out her life and love.
It’s said that the four-leaf clover symbolizes wealth, fame, a faithful lover and good health. Pressed between two layers of glass, this genuine four-leaf clover is surrounded by a polished-aluminum frame and sturdy stand. There is no gift that is more perfect for your lucky love on St. Patrick’s Day than this framed genuine four-leaf clover.
Have your sweetie search for his/her own lucky pot o’ gold! You can fill a small pot with golden chocolate coins (found at most candy stores) and a love letter inside. You can either leave the pot o’gold out in the open for your sweetie to find or leave clues filled with romantic notions leading them to the end of their rainbow…

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