Ask Dan and Jennifer » sex education

Blowjob Tip #2 – She’s In Charge, Here’s Why… (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 14:00:26 +0000

If you’re learning how to give a great blowjob, one of the best tips you can employ is being in charge and being confident of your abilities to give great head. Even if you’re new at it, being in charge can be pleasurable for both you and your partner. Here’s why!

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Why It’s Good For Him

Since most men take control during sex and even during a blowjob, logically, it doesn’t make sense that they would want to give up control, does it? But get this – most men take control during sex because they have no choice. Many women don’t know how to enjoy themselves during sex and end up lying there, making the man do all the work if he wants anything to happen. Guys are actually aching to give up control! What better way to get pleasure than to have a woman worship your penis and be completely devoted to giving you pleasure? It’s awesome! He loves it when you take control, let him lie back and enjoy the ride.

Why It’s Good For You

Taking charge when giving head is good for you because you get to do what you want to do. Don’t like a certain position? Try another one. Getting a jaw cramp? Switch to using your hand for a little while. Deep throating make you gag? Lick it like a lollipop instead. Of course you want to take his verbal and non-verbal feedback into account when using different techniques and do what he likes best, but you want to be comfortable and enjoy giving him head as much as he enjoys getting it.

Why You Need To Be Confident

It’s important to be confident – or at least appear that way – when you’re going down on your guy. Nothing ruins a great blowjob than a passive girl asking, “Am I doing this right?” or “Did I do something wrong?” Sure, you want to ask your man questions. But you want to use positive, confident phrases that assert your control, such as “Do you like this?” or “Does this feel good?” or even, “Tell me what feels good.” Your demeanor can actually make all the difference during fellatio. You want your man to relax and let go, feeling good about leaving you in the driver’s seat. Who wants to enjoy the ride with a driver who’s constantly worried they’ll wreck and asking you if they’re hitting the brakes right or accelerating properly?

A blowjob works much the same way – a guy just wants to know that you know what you’re doing (or at least perceive that you know what you’re doing) and get lost in the feeling of getting great head. So be confident and take charge! You’ll both like blowjobs a lot better if you do.

Think You Know How To Give A Great Blowjob? Take the Blowjob Quiz and find out!

Take just a minute to check out ‘Blow His Mind Tonight’: “What Your Man Secretly Wishes You Knew About Oral Sex… But Will Never, Ever Tell You To Your Face!”

Blowjob Tip #1 – Why It’s a Gift, Not an Obligation (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 13:00:58 +0000

Men love to get blowjobs – in fact, many men prefer getting oral sex to vaginal intercourse and sometimes, it’s their favorite type of stimulation of all time. Naturally, women who want to please their partners want to find out the best blowjob tips and advice so they can be an oral sex master – here’s what you want to know on how to give the best blowjob!

Oral sex is one of the most intimate gifts we can give one another. When a woman gives a man oral or manual stimulation, you are giving him a very special gift. That means you’re in charge! Here are some tips to make the experience more pleasurable for both of you.

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The Greatest Sexual Gift

When a man gives a woman oral sex, he does what he thinks will make her feel good. When a woman gives a man oral sex, she let’s him take the reins and shows her how he likes it, even to the point of physically manipulating her to maximize his own pleasure. Not only can this be uncomfortable for a woman, it doesn’t allow her to give head as a “gift” to her partner. One of the great things about oral sex is that it’s one of the best sexual gifts you can give. Since oral sex provides the giving partner no physical stimulation whatsoever, the focus is totally on the receiving partner and their pleasure. So to give oral sex to someone means you’re focusing on their pleasure and their pleasure alone. When a man takes the reins when she’s giving him a blowjob, that takes away from the fact that she’s “giving” him a sexual gift, making her feel more used than treasured.

Women In The Driver’s Seat

If you’re going to go down on him, it’s time to sit in the driver’s seat. Let your partner know that you’re in control and that you’re giving him the gift of oral sex – so he just needs to sit back and enjoy it! Blindfold him and tie his hands behind his back if you have to (which can, of course, add to the fun) but it’s important that he doesn’t try to take control while you’re giving him oral sex. If he’s not the submissive type, it may be an adjustment, but in the long run, allowing you to enjoy giving him the gift of oral sex – instead of making it an obligation or making you feel used – will give him more pleasure. He’ll like watching you enjoy it and he’ll get blowjobs more often!

Listen To His Feedback

It’s essential that you listen to his verbal and non-verbal feedback when you’re giving your partner fellatio. While you get to pleasure him how you’d like, listening to what makes him feel good is important. For example, if he lets you know verbally what he likes, make sure you incorporate that into your blowjob routine. You can also listen to your partner’s non-verbal feedback. For example, if your partner is quiet or doesn’t seem to be getting into it, change what you’re doing. If your partner starts making noise and showing that he’s really enjoying what you’re doing, keep doing what you’re doing! Otherwise, your partner should lie back, relax and enjoy your oral sex gift!

Think You Know How To Give A Great Blowjob? Take the Blowjob Quiz and find out!

Take just a minute to check out ‘Blow His Mind Tonight’: “What Your Man Secretly Wishes You Knew About Oral Sex… But Will Never, Ever Tell You To Your Face!”

What Is The Best Age To Start Having Sex? (Video)

Paul Carlson — Mon, 31 Aug 2009 14:00:38 +0000

Teenagers (and some adults) are have been asking for quite some time, “What is the right age to start having sex?” Teens are asking because they want to know when they get the green card to let their hormones take control, and adults are asking because they want to know when they should give their teenagers that same green card. So when is the best age to start having sex, and does it differ from person to person and family to family?

So what is the right age to have sex for the first time? What’s the right age to enter into a sexual relationship? Here are our often controversial thoughts on this topic, and we want to know what your thoughts are on this topic – when do you think the best age is for someone to start having sex? Check out our YouTube page and leave a comment!

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Be Safe And Be Smart

Before we start discussing what age you should or shouldn’t start having sex at, let’s address safe sex at any age. People can recommend that magic “age” all they want, but when it boils down to it, each person is going to make that choice for themselves. So whatever age you decide to have sex for the first time, make sure you’re being safe! Unprotected sex leads to sexually transmitted diseases and infections, and possible pregnancy. Don’t take a chance – use a condom or a dental dam, and know who you’re having sex with. No matter what age you are, if you’re having sex, you’re worth having safe sex.

Waiting

Of course for the younger generation, abstinence is ideal, but it doesn’t always happen that way. Teenagers and pre-teens are having sex and becoming sexual at an earlier age every year it seems like it. Middle schoolers are even beginning to have sex, and some late elementary school age children are starting to show signs of being interested in sex! Of course you want to wait as long as you possibly can. Even if you decide to wait until you’re eighteen, or until you’re married, it is still smart to be honestly and comprehensively educated about sex, about your options and about the consequences of sex. You always want to be armed with information before you make a decision.

A Good Age To Have Sex

Levels of maturity differ from person to person and morals and beliefs differ from family to family. Respect your moral beliefs, and respect your maturity. Women are often more mature than men, and may be ready for sex before men are. Teenagers, however, may not be ready for the consequences of having sex period and that is definitely something to take into consideration. It is your choice though to have sex, no matter what age you are. Once you’ve educated yourself about sex and know how to be safe and what the consequences (emotional and physical) of sex are, you’ll have a better idea if you’re ready or not. If you’re ready, make it special and make it safe. If you’re not, wait.

If you do, however, decide to have sex for the first time, don’t think there’s no going back. Just because you have sex once, does not mean that you have to continue if you don’t want to! You may not be a physical virgin again, but you can decide each and every time whether you want to have sex or not. If you have sex and regret it, don’t do it again. It’s always your choice.

When Should You Talk To Your Kids About Sex? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 17:00:38 +0000

Sex ed is a hot topic these days, with teens making pacts to get pregnant and STD’s on the rise. Kids obviously need sex ed – but are they getting it? Who is responsible for teaching kids about sex, and when and how should it be done? Are schools responsible for sex ed? Are books or the Internet responsible, or how about movies, music and TV? No - you, as a parent, are solely responsible for your child’s sexual education. So when should you talk to your kids about sex?

What is the right age to tell your kids about sex? 8? 10? 15? 18? Watch this video to hear what we think about talking to your kids about sex. Visit our YouTube Page to comment and share what you believe is the right age. We also want to hear about your funny ’situations’ – what’s the most awkward question your kids have asked you about sex? When did they ask it? How did they ask it? How did you react to the question?

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Why We Don’t Want To Talk To Our Kids About Sex

We don’t want to talk to our kids about sex because it makes us uncomfortable. Maybe our parents didn’t talk to us about sex, or we’re embarassed about sex. Heck, most of us can’t even talk to our partners about sex, let alone talk to our kids! But we’re adults – we’re supposed to have the answers. That’s what parenthood is all about. If you don’t know the answers, go find them and live up to the responsibility of being a parent. Maybe it makes you uncomfortable to talk to your child about sex, but how uncomfortable are you going to be when your twelve year old daughter comes home pregnant? Or your teenage son has caught a nasty case of Chlamydia or worse – HIV? That’s a pretty uncomfortable situation and you will then, of course, have to talk to them about sex and why they’re pregnant or infected with a sexually transmitted disease. Why wait until it is too late?

The Right Time Is Now

Okay, we don’t mean “now” as in right this second, especially if your kid is still in diapers. We mean “now” as in talking to your kids about sex when they ask about it. If they don’t ask you about it, it means they’re getting their information from somewhere else, because they will ask. So if they ask you about sex, take the opportunity to answer their questions in an age appropriate manner and be grateful they’re not asking their teenage friends or worse, relying on movies and television to show them how it’s done.

There are three keys that you need to know when taking it upon yourself to discuss sex with your child – first, wait until they ask, but let them know beforehand that it’s okay to ask and make them feel comfortable and safe when asking about sex. Second, answer their questions in an age appropriate way. If your child is eight and asking about sex, you can explain to them simply that it is how children are made. Third, answer your child’s question and only your child’s question. Just because they asked a question about sex doesn’t mean you have to launch into an entire birds-and-the-bees lecture. Often, children will be satsified that their question was answered and go on about their business. They’ll ask more and want to know more along the way – so let them lead.

Stop Making Up Fairytales

You’ve known for a long time that children aren’t delivered by the stork, and that hospitals don’t deliver babies as a package. You’ve known how babies are born, did it yourself even, and have known for quite some time how sex really works. So why make up a story to tell to your children for the time being, only to have to tell them it was a lie later? Don’t tell your kids that babies come from the stork, or any other silly explanation about sex so you can escape the sex talk until a later date. It’s the 20th century people. Grow up!

Lead By Example

You want your kids to grow up and have loving, healthy relationships in which they can have smart, safe sex right? You want them to never have to deal with a sexually transmitted disease or infection, and you want them to have a baby when they are ready. You want them to love and be loved by their partner for who they are, right? So show them what a loving, healthy relationship is.

Do We Need Real Sex Ed In Schools? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 06 Aug 2009 13:30:28 +0000

Sex education in schools – if you have a child , it’s undoubtedly something you’re going to encounter at some point during your child’s school education. You’ll want to know what your child is learning – but does that mean that those of us who do not have children should be unconcerned about the sex education that our children as a society are being taught? Not hardly – there are too many limitations placed on sex ed these days in school that the lack of comprehensive sex education is truly an epidemic of large proportions.

What do you think? Should we educate our kids about sex and how to be safe, or tell them to pretend all their friends aren’t having sex and hope for the best? Education or ignorance?

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Abstinence Only?

Every sex education program needs to include abstinence. It is a great choice for teens of all ages, because it keeps them completely safe from pregnancy, STD’s and emotional damage until they’re ready for it. But abstinence is just that – a choice. There are other choices when it comes to sex ed, mainly deciding to have sex and have protected or unprotected sex. It’s a choice that many of our teens today are making – they’re making the decisions, so why aren’t we talking to them about it?

According to a 2006 study from the Guttmacher Institute, abstinence only programs make up the sex education curriculum in half of the schools in the southern United States and 1 in 5 schools in the northern part of the U.S. Many schools absolutely forbid education on safer sex, such as education about available contraceptives. Some abstinence only education curriculums do touch on sexually transmitted diseases, if only to scare teens into becoming abstinent, and some touch on male and female anatomy and how babies are born.

Government Control?

Why are the schools in the United States choosing abstinent only curriculum? Waiting until marriage to have sex is largely a religious concept, and with the separation of church and state, schools are no longer allowed to have prayer in schools – so why are they promoting a form of sex education that is founded on religion? A little digging unearths some unsettling facts. $176 million dollars in government funding is available to schools in the United States who promote an abstinence only sex education program. $0 is available to schools in the United States who choose to teach comprehensive sex ed in their classrooms. The federal guidelines for sexual activity include anything that is sexually arousing – including kissing and hugging – and federal guidelines for these sex ed programs require teachers to suggest that sex outside of marriage is wrong and unsafe at any age.

Teens Will Choose To Have Sex – So What Do We Do?

Teaching abstinence in schools doesn’t automatically shut off a teenager’s hormones. It doesn’t suddenly make them not want to have sex, especially when our marketing, television shows and commericals, movies and music promote sex and sexuality at every turn. Our job as parents – and as a civilized society – is to teach children about all of their choices, including the choices to have sex both protected and unprotected. Knowledge is power and children deserve to know what their options are, including what can happen with each choice. Children deserve to know how you feel about sex and what you expect of them, as well as how to learn what they expect of themselves. A properly educated teenager may choose not to have sex at all, or they may choose to have safe, protected sex with someone they care about when they are ready. Uneducated or poorly educated children will not know what to do when a sexual situation arises, when they don’t understand why they should say no, or what to do when their bodies are telling them to do something entirely different. They may choose to have sex, but they may not know that there are options available to help make sex safer for both them and their partners, so they may end up pregnant or with a sexually transmitted diseases.

Perhaps it’s too soon to hope that the federal government will fund comprehensive sex education, but it certainly something we can take into our own hands. Find out what they’re teaching at your child’s school, and fill in the gaps. Give your children the power to choose – and to choose wisely.

Female Orgasm Tip #3 – Why Communication Is Crucial (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 15:00:08 +0000

Giving a woman an orgasm doesn’t have to be tricky – in fact, it doesn’t even require a circus full of performances, contrary to popular belief. You might think you have to stand on your head, recite the alphabet backwards and even juggle with your feet (at the same time, of course) to give your girl the big “O,” but the truth is that nothing is further from the truth. We’re going to go into one of the more basic (but no less intimidating) aspects of giving a girl a toe curling orgasm – communication.

When you hear communication, you normally think “talking” but words are not always the best way to communicate – especially when you’re having sex. In this video, you’ll find out why non-verbal communication is so important.

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Vanilla, Chocolate or Strawberry - What’s Your Flavor?

Just like everyone has different flavor preferences when it comes to ice cream, everyone has different preference when it comes to sex. It’s a rather basic comparison, but an easy one. If you take your girl to an ice cream parlor, how do you order her ice cream? Do you ask what flavor she wants, or do you pick one for her and hope she likes it, only to find out later that it was her least favorite and she only pretended to like it to be nice? Now take that scenario and apply it to giving your girl an orgasm – do you try to find out what she likes, or just wing it and risk doing something she doesn’t like in the bedroom?

Communication Is Key

Okay, so asking your woman what she likes in the sack isn’t as easy as asking her what her favorite ice cream flavor is. It’s much more difficult – in fact, some people are incredibly shy about talking about sexual topics in general and try to avoid it at all costs. Of course, communicating verbally about what she likes in the bedroom is the better way to go about it, but you can also use different forms of non-verbal communication to give you clues about what feels good and what doesn’t. Imagine going to the ice cream parlor and instead of asking her what she likes, watch her as she browses the flavors. Is she giving you any cues about what flavor she likes, such as looking at one more than the other, or even asking for a sample and exclaiming, “Mmmmm!” You can do the same thing during sex – when you’re using a sexual technique, see how she responds to it. Is she saying, “Mmmm!” or is she perhaps using body language to suggest another technique? You can even devise a system between you and your partner to let each other know what feels good and what doesn’t, such as a special word, or a type of moan or even a special touch.

Ladies Only – A Man’s Delicate Ego

Ladies, beware a man’s delicate ego. He doesn’t like to hear criticism about his performance – in fact, he’d rather not hear about what he was doing wrong at all. So how do you let him know if he’s doing something you don’t like? It’s easy – instead of mentioning what he shouldn’t be doing, make a big deal about what he does that you do like. Did he rub you the right way and really get you going last night? Make sure you are vocal about it during the act, mention how good it felt afterwards and for good measure, mention it next week. Chances are, he’ll repeat whatever it was that he did that pushed your hot buttons.

Think you understand Female Orgasms? Take the Orgasm Quiz and find out!

Take just a minute to check out ‘The Female Orgasm Black Book’: “How To Give Her Mind Numbing, Leg Shaking Orgasms”

What Does Abstinence Mean To You? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Sun, 02 Aug 2009 01:00:39 +0000

If you’ve heard about sex ed, you’ve likely heard about abstinence. What is abstinence, anyway? Basically, it’s just a fancy word for not having sex. Believe it or not though, abstinence may not be as black and white as you think. Abstinence means different things to different people. What does abstinence mean to you?

We can all generally accept the idea that sexual abstinence means waiting for marriage to have sex… But here’s where it gets tricky – What does “Sex” mean to you? Is it sexual intercourse? Is it any sexually arousing experience? Is it oral sex? Anal Sex? Masturbation?

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The Definition Of Abstinence

Abstinence, in it’s most basic form, is to abstain, or keep from, doing something. Most people refer to it as refraining from having sex, but you can also abstain from alcohol, cigarettes, or anything really. In it’s most popular form, however, the definition of abstinence means to keep from having sex. In most cultures, the term abstinence refers to waiting until marriage to have sex, however, any couple can practice abstinence even if they’re married. Some married couples practice abstinence at a certain time during a woman’s monthly cycle as a form of birth control. In this article though, we’re going to explore how abstinence can mean different things to different people.

Defining Sex

To define not having sex, first you have to define the term sex itself. What does having “sex” mean to you? Does having sex mean only penetration, therefore abstinence from sex means oral sex doesn’t fall into that category? Or does having sex mean every type of sex, including oral sex, anal sex, masturbation and vaginal intercourse? Does your definition of abstinence relate to being a virgin? Is virginity still intact only if you abstain from vaginal intercourse, or is virginity intact if one abstains from the use of sex toys, or even tampons as well?

It Remains Undefined

The definition of sex, much like the definition of abstinence, remains essentially undefined. It means something different for everyone, and only you can decide what counts as sex and what counts as abstinence – no one else can or should decide for you. Abstinence, just like having sex, is a personal choice. Examine your own beliefs and morals, and do what feels right for you. Don’t let parents, a culture, society or your friends or family members pressure you into deciding to have sex or deciding to be abstinent – or even deciding what actions constitute sex and abstinence unless you’re sure that it’s what you want. It’s also not a one way street – just because you choose to be abstinent now doesn’t mean you can’t choose to have sex later if that’s what you decide. Similarly, if you decide to have sex now, that doesn’t mean you can’t decide to become abstinent later. While you may have lost your virginity in doing so, don’t assume that means you have to continue having sex if you’re not comfortable with it. Do what feels right to you!

Know Your Boundaries First

Before making your decision, know your boundaries. Think of the possible situations you might be in, and what you might decide if confronted with that situation. Really think about it – if you’re abstinent, does oral sex count? Does giving a handjob count? Do you want to be totally abstinent from every type of sex? Don’t be caught off guard – know what you want and what doesn’t coincide with your decision before you put yourself in a situation that might possibly make you uncomfortable if you aren’t prepared. Don’t forget sex education – learn about STD’s, pregnancy and birth control even if you’re being abstinent. You’ll be able to make smarter choices when you do decide to have sex. Ultimately, you’re responsible for your own sex education. You’re responsible for your body, right?

Female Orgasm Tip #2 – How To Build Sexual Excitement With Anticipation (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 30 Jul 2009 01:00:39 +0000

There’s nothing like teasing to get your partner going…and when we say teasing, we really, really mean it! Learn the importance of building anticipation before sex and how it can play a role in both your partner’s ability to have a great orgasm and her overall sexual satisfaction.

Now that she’s relaxed, it time to build her sexual excitement with ‘anticipation’. Watch this video to see exactly what we mean…

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Getting Her More Aroused

Your partner is relaxed and ready for sex. Do you just “stick it in?” Of course not! What a great way to spoil all of your hard work in getting her to relax! Now is the perfect time to build her anticipation for sex and get her completely aroused. Don’t just “go for the gold” and go straight down on her either – this is the part where you want to tease her and get her to absolutely beg for sexual release! Getting your partner properly aroused is essential to not only her pleasure, but yours! When a woman is aroused, she secrets vaginal lubrication, making sex more pleasurable for both you and her.

The Art Of Teasing

Going for the gold without getting her aroused is a great way to turn your partner off. Not only is it a mental and emotional turnoff for a woman (especially if you’ve spent all that time relaxing her and showering with her only for the actual sex to be over so quickly) but it can also be a physical turnoff. If her clitoris isn’t properly aroused and her vagina isn’t properly lubricated, direct clitoral stimulation can actually become painful.

To tease your partner, touch her on every area of her body but her clitoris. Of course you don’t want to ignore it completely, so give it a good lick or gentle rub every minute or so. However, it is better to spend most of this time massaging her breasts, licking her nipples, kissing her mouth and neck deeply, licking her thighs and letting your tongue rove in and out of her vaginal folds. Take your time during this part and your woman will become incredibly, inconsolably turned on – so much so that it would take a great deal to turn her off!

Make Your Move

Once you’ve gotten her completely aroused, feel free to proceed with sex as you please. Finish going down on her until she has a mind blowing orgasm, or have penetrating sex where you reach her g-spot. Either way, once your partner is not only relaxed, but sufficiently aroused and warmed up, your partner will be closer to an incredible orgasm than you or her could possibly imagine.

While the occasional quickie is something that shouldn’t be forgotton, use this sexy technique any time you want your partner to be totally, 100% involved in sex and thinking of nothing else. This is a technique you can use all the time – women rarely get tired of having a man focus totally on them and their arousal and pleasure!

Think you understand Female Orgasms? Take the Orgasm Quiz and find out!

Take just a minute to check out ‘The Female Orgasm Black Book’: “How To Give Her Mind Numbing, Leg Shaking Orgasms”

Female Orgasm Tip #1 – Why Relaxation Is Crucial (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Tue, 28 Jul 2009 03:53:49 +0000

Giving your partner the ultimate orgasm seems like it’s too good to be true, right? Wrong! You can absolutely become a sex god and give your woman the orgasm she craves – how? We’ll outline everything you need to know in our Female Orgasm Tips series. Read on!

Relaxation is crucial before sex for a woman to have orgasm. Fact is, almost all men overlook this CRITICAL step. If she is not relaxed before sex, there’s very little hope that she’ll ever reach orgasm. How can you get her relaxed?

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Physical And Mental Relaxation

Most women spend the day thinking about their to-do lists. You might be surprised at how often money, her job, your job, washing the dishes, making dinner and even children can crop up in her mind during the day. Unfortunately, these thoughts don’t instantly leave her mind as soon as she steps through the bedroom door. If she’s not relaxed mentally (and physically), your partner will still be thinking about doing the laundry while you and her are doing the dirty. How can you make her relax?

To give her a great orgasm, it’s your job to help her to forget the daily stresses in her life and help her feel only sexual tension. Here’s a step by step guide to getting her warmed up:

1. Setting the stage – Help your partner get into a sexy frame of mind by setting the stage for her. Dim the bedroom lights, light some candles, burn some incense and even scatter some rose petals across the bed and floor. Sure, it might sound romance-movie cliche, but it works. Your partner will walk in knowing what is in store for her tonight and begin the process of relaxation.

2. Get cleaned up – take a bath or shower together. Women love baths and showers, and this is a great way to get her to relax. Taking a bath or shower helps your partner transition mentally from a crazy, overwhelming day to an evening where she can relax and it’s all about sexual pleasure and living in the moment. Don’t underestimate the power of cleanliness either. A woman feels her best when she is clean and presentable – trying to go down on her after she’s just gotten out of the hot car after a day of exhausting work is not going to turn her on. In fact, it will probably do the opposite. You might not mind her natural smell, but in her mind, it makes her feel incredibly self conscious and she won’t be able to relax. Let her shower – you can even give her a deliciously scented bottle of new body wash as a sweet gift, and lather her up to get her physically in the mood for sex.

3. Physical relaxation – your partner may be mentally ready for sex now, but she’s probably not physically ready. Women take a long time to get warmed up – they don’t turn on like a light switch. Give your partner a sensual massage to help get her body turned on for sex. Massage her thighs, her breasts and buttocks, while kissing and licking her ears and lips. Remember, this is a sensual massage – not a “put her to sleep massage.”

Now that you know how to get your partner nice and relaxed before sex, you can increase the chances that your partner will not only have an orgasm, but have an incredible one that she won’t forget!

Think you understand Female Orgasms? Take the Orgasm Quiz and find out!

Take just a minute to check out ‘The Female Orgasm Black Book’: “How To Give Her Mind Numbing, Leg Shaking Orgasms”

Top 5 FREE Sex Education Resources (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 17 Jul 2009 01:00:13 +0000

Sex education – it’s a touchy topic and it’s everywhere. But what is modern sex education teaching us and our youth? Are we being honest about sex, or does today’s “sex education” leave much to be desired? We’re going to give you our 5 favorite FREE sex education resources, so you can start filling in the gaps, whether you’re educating yourself or educating someone else.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Your Local Health Department

Your local health department is probably step one when it comes to getting the best free or reduced cost health and sex services. Believe it or not, your local health deparment will provide services including free or reduced cost physical exams, breast exams and pap smears, as well as sexually transmitted disease testing and sexually transmitted infection treatment. Many health departments offer free birth control supplies including condoms and birth control pills, as well as other hormonal birth control methods such as the IUD, the diaphragm, the birth control ring or the birth control patch or shot.

Find your local health department by visiting Health Guide USA and clicking on “local health departments.”

SexEtc.org

SexEtc.org is a great sex education resource for teens. It’s an easy to navigate website with full feature videos, forums and articles on the sex topics teens really want to know about. The best thing about SexEtc.org? It’s written by teens, for teens! Most teenagers hate the “condescending” feel of sex education from adults, and SexEtc.org gives teens the information they need from their very own peers. Teens can even chat and participate in polls on everything from their first time to homophobic bullying and more. If you are a teen or are a teen’s parent, definitely check out SexEtc.org!

Scarleteen.com

Scarleteen.com is another teen oriented sex education website with lots of useful information presented in a way that teens and even young adults can understand and relate to. This website is article heavy, but the articles are precisely on the topics that teens today want to know about, such as male reproductive choices, how guys can prevent rape and even more topics for girls! When researching sex ed topics, be sure to look at several credible websites and use your own judgement – most of the time, if you see similar information on a topic come up again and again on different websites, you can trust that the information is reliable.

Positive.org

The message given by Positive.org is a simple yet powerful one – you have the right to complete and honest sex education! A little less colorful than some of the other teen centered websites, Positive.org appeals not only to many teens but also adults of all ages who want the straight facts on sex. This site is a little more difficult to navigate, but talks about every sex topic you could possibly want to know about, including information about STD’s and STI’s, homosexuality, teen sex, safer sex, pregnancy prevention and much, much more.

Sexuality.org

Sexuality.org is a more adult oriented sex education website and is like an online book with lots of information available. Read articles about sexuality topics, review guides on educational books and videos, and check out transcripts of presentations from popular therapists, doctors and other notable figures. Sexuality.org offers lots of different perspectives on topics from erotic massage, tantra and BDSM, as well as other sex education topics such as pregnancy, birth control and STD and STI prevention.

Sperm, Semen and Safe Sex – What You Need To Know (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 01:00:50 +0000

Sex education, unfortunately, is at a low nowadays. Although our society has evolved exponentially since sex was considered completely taboo – sex education is still primitive. Television shows, movies, music and even the Internet has taken sex to a completely new level, with songs about “booty calls” and nudity on prime time, but adults in this nation can’t bear to discuss more than the scant basics of sex with their youth. It’s about time somebody steps up and gives solid, useful information about every aspect of sex in an educational way so that our youth can make informed decisions about sex, oral sex and foreplay.

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

My girlfriend gives me blow jobs, hand jobs, etc. Every time we play, this white sticky stuff come out, and then after a few minutes cum comes out – what is all this stuff coming out of me?

–Jason, TX

Click here to view the embedded video.

Sperm, Semen and Precum

Lots of girls want to know – what’s the skinny on sperm, semen and precum? What are they?

Precum – The clear, thinnish and somewhat sticky liquid that comes out of the head of the penis in small amounts during penile stimulation before he actually ejaculates. Precum can and does contain live sperm, although in significantly smaller amounts than actual semen.

Semen – The whitish, thicker fluid that comes out of the head of the penis during ejaculation that contains millions of sperm.

Sperm – Organisms carried within semen and precum that join with a woman’s egg to conceive a child.

Which Of These Can Get A Girl Pregnant?

In short – all of them! Precum and semen both contain sperm. Having unprotected sex without a condom, even before the man ejaculates, can get a woman pregnant. It is better to treat a penis like a loaded gun. Many women believe that allowing a man to have intercourse with her without a condom is safe, as long as the guy pulls his penis out of her vagina before he ejaculates, and ejaculates away from her vagina. While this is safer than allowing your partner to actually ejaculate inside you, it is not a way to protect against pregnancy. Sperm can travel out of the penis pretty much at any time – allowing a condomless penis to get within the vicinity of your vagina puts you at a definite risk of getting pregnant.

Don’t chance it! Even allowing your partner to rub his penis on the outside of your vagina without a condom can transmit sperm from the penis to the vagina and there’s a reason that sperm are called “little swimmers.” They travel! For the safest type of sex, use a condom to prevent pregnancy. You can also discuss with your doctor other methods of birth control that can be used in conjunction with a condom for added protection, or in lieu of a condom if your with an STD free partner and in a completely faithful, monogamous relationship.

Which Of These Can Transmit A Sexually Transmitted Disease?

In short – all of them! Again, treat a condomless penis like a loaded gun, even more so if you’re unsure if your partner has a sexually transmitted disease. To clarify, unless you have a piece of paper in your hand that says your partner has tested negative for STD’s and you’re 110% positive your partner has not had any type of sexual contact with anyone else since the test was taken, you’re unsure of whether your partner has an STD. Protect yourself. Both precum and semen can carry the HIV and AIDS virus, as well as other sexually transmitted diseases. It is important to be even more vigilant if you’re concerned about STD’s, however, because you don’t just have to worry about any fluids from your partner’s penis coming into contact with your vagina, you also have to worry about these fluids possibly coming into contact with your mouth or any open sores or cuts on your body.

For example, if you knicked yourself shaving and your partner rubs his penis up your leg without a condom, you can possibly contract an STD that way. It’s rare – yes. But possible. Be safe and get STD tested, suggest that your partner get STD tested, stay in a monogamous, faithful relationship whenever possible, and use condoms during anal sex, oral sex and vaginal intercourse any time you’re unsure. Always treat your partner’s penis as though it can get you pregnant or give you an STD because in truth – it can! That doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy sex. Just be safe and smart about it!

Oral Sex and STD’s – What You Need To Know (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 30 Apr 2009 20:00:03 +0000

While contracting an STD from unprotected oral sex (whether giving or receiving) is less likely than contracting an STD from unprotected intercourse, it’s still entirely possible. Chlamydia in your throat, anyone? It’s important to be as cautious and safe with oral sex as you would be with intercourse – and there’s lots of ways you can do that!

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Can you get STDs from oral sex? Is it a moot point to wear a condom for intercourse after that, if you’ve already had unprotected oral sex? What about girl on girl oral sex?

–Mike, FL

Click here to view the embedded video.

Less Likely? How Less Likely?

Sure, it’s less likely to contract or pass STD’s through oral sex, but how less likely? Do you even want to fool with “less likely?” Although the chances of getting sexually transmitted diseases from unprotected oral sex than those of having unprotected intercourse, you can still contract STD’s such as chlamydia, ghonnorhea, syphilis, herpes and even HIV and AIDS from unprotected oral sex. Don’t chance it! If you’re not in a monogomous relationship in which both partners have been thoroughly tested for STD’s, protect yourself during intercourse and oral sex. You can use dental dams, flavored condoms or even plastic wrap in a pinch! Don’t like the way it feels? Try using a little bit of lube on the inside of the condom/dental dam/plastic wrap to create a more natural feeling.

Using A Condom During Intercourse After Having Unprotected Oral Sex

Is it a moot point to use a condom during intercourse if you’ve already had unprotected oral sex? Not at all! Even if the person you were having unprotected oral sex with has an STD, it’s entirely possible that you did not contract it during oral sex. It’s possible you did, but it’s also possible you didn’t. It’s much more likely that you’ll contract the disease through unprotected intercourse, so why set yourself up? Wrap it up instead! Again, if you’re not in a monogomous relationship with a partner you know for a fact is STD free, protect yourself as much as possible. Even if you didn’t use protection during oral sex, it’s still worth it to use a condom during intercourse.

Get Some Information!

The Internet is jam-packed full of information about sexually transmitted diseases, how each one is spread and how you can give or contract them through sex and oral sex. With a simple Google search, you can find out the specifics – such as how a particular disease can be spread through a particular sex act, as well as the best way to protect yourself. Don’t believe the old wives tales – you know, the ones like you can prevent pregnancy by douching afterwards (which by the way can actually improve your chances of getting pregnant). Read the information on legitimate websites, such as WebMD or the CDC website instead of checking out websites that don’t have credible information.

It’s all about being safe, smart and well informed. While any type of sex – oral, vaginal or anal – puts you at risk for giving or contracting sexually transmitted diseases (protected or unprotected) you can significantly reduce your risk by practicing safer sex and using condoms and dental dams. Protect yourself – you’re worth it!

The “Right” Going The Wrong Way Down Sexual Drive

Christ Pro Erotic — Sun, 29 Mar 2009 02:06:53 +0000

I hereby ask all religious groups, Christian “family” organizations, and churches everywhere who for years pushed for every law against sex to be drawn to disband and withdraw from the culture wars you’ve waged on America. Your arguments over abortion, same sex marriage, and the like no longer hold muster; your bombast over swingers and BDSM enthusiasts is but a whisper; your message is dishonest and disingenuous to a nation of believers and unbelievers alike.

Sexual Freedom? In America?

For so long we’ve heard these groups (i.e. American Family Forum, Christian Coalition, etc.) from around the country make some of the strongest and strangest pushes for control over sexual freedom in the past thirty years. But in the past few weeks/months, a few key stories came to light cause me to think it is time for the Culture Wars to end. In Texas, a group pushes for clear teaching regarding sexual education; in Alaska, a story from Bristol Palin, daughter of former Republican Vice Presidential nominee Gov. Sarah Palin; then comes an article from the Journal of Economic Perspectives, a study which shows who are the biggest consumers of adult material. (Hint: They might be in your pews.)

First let’s go to a recent study regarding the purchase habits of those buying adult material. It seems this new study from New Science magazine http://www.newscientist.com/article/dn16680-porn-in-the-usa-conservatives-are-biggest-consumers.html?DCMP=OTC-rss&nsref=online-news followed the anonymous study of credit card receipts. The report finds most of the adult material bought in America comes from states who tend to be conservative. The biggest adult consumers comes from the great state of Utah. Yes, THAT Utah! Eight of the ten states with the highest consumption gave their support to Sen. John McCain during the past presidential election with the other two states going for Barack Obama.

The one statement from this study which speaks volumes:

Do consumption patterns of on-line adult entertainment reveal two separate Americas? Or is the consumption of on-line adult entertainment widespread, regardless of legal barriers, potential for embarrassment, and even religious conviction?”

This is one of the questions Christians and right wing moralists will need to ask themselves. How much longer do the gatekeepers keep telling us their own virtuous examples of faith and fidelity when they are no better than the sinners they rail against? To coin a phrase I heard from former Christian music group 2^nd Chapter of Actions “No one will have a secret, no one will tell a lie/things that are done in hiding are going to reach to the highest sky.”

Fighting For Credible, Useful Sex-Ed Information

Second, the Texas Freedom Network fighting the good fight to giving credible, sane, and informative sex-ed information to those who need it in Texas schools. They took their fight for a more comprehensive teaching of sexuality/relationship to the steps of the Austin State Capital. TFN’s hope is to get the facts to their teens and pre-teens to all students in the state. I encourage you to watch the proceedings of those involved with TFN regarding their findings about sexual education in Texas schools.

Click here to view the embedded video.

Hypocrisy Unveiled….

How To Put On A Condom (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Fri, 27 Feb 2009 01:15:11 +0000

Whether it’s your first time or your three hundredth time, putting on a condom the correct way might still prove elusive to you. How do you put on a condom safely, how do you make sure the condom is still good and how do you take it off correctly to avoid spillage? Here’s answers to your questions, and more!

Dear Dan And Jennifer,

I’m a first time condom wearer – I want to be safe, but how do I put one on the right way? It seems harder than it should be! Do you have any tips?

–Terry, Washington

Click here to view the embedded video.

Checking Your Condom

First, keep your condoms in a cool, dry place. Condoms that are kept in glove compartments, wallets and back pockets can break down more easily than condoms that are kept in a drawer or another safe place. Before opening your condom, make sure the condom hasn’t passed its expiration date – yes, condoms can expire! Open your condom gently to make sure you’re tearing only the package (not the condom) and check it for consistency. Make sure if it’s a lubricated condom that the lube is still moist, and make sure your condom is still in good, working condition. If it seems like your condom might not be ready to go, throw it out and get a new one!

Putting Your Condom On

You might want to put your condom on in a lighted situation – putting on a condom in complete darkness can lead you to possibly put it on the wrong way. Grab the built in reservoir on the top and roll the condom slowly down the penis, making sure that all of the air bubbles are worked out of the condom before you start. To avoid fluid contamination, be sure that both your hands and penis are clean before putting on a condom. Be very careful that no fluid from the penis gets on the outside of the condom before you begin intercourse, as this may lead to sexually transmitted diseases and pregnancy.

Removing Your Condom

When you’re ready to remove your condom, pull your penis out slowly while gripping the base of the condom to avoid spilling any seminal fluid that is inside the condom. Turn completely away from your partner before removing it, and slowly roll the condom back up the penis while making sure that the seminal fluid stays in the built in reservoir. Take your used condom, wrap it in tissue and throw it away properly – they don’t flush! Wash your hands and penis thoroughly with soap and water before touching your partner again.

Tips And Pointers

If a condom breaks, pull out immediately and remove the condom, washing thoroughly before putting on another one. Make sure your condom fits properly – if it’s not snug, or there are air bubbles or it seems too loose, your condom might be too big and you may need to choose a smaller size. It can also be dangerous if your condom is too small or too tight – if the ring around the base of the condom doesn’t go all the way to the base of your penis, the condom isn’t the right size for you. Don’t be afraid to experiment with different types of condoms until you find the right one for you!

Do I Really Need To Wear A Condom? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 26 Feb 2009 13:43:15 +0000

Whether you’re new to sex or not, you might wonder if you really need a condom. You’ve heard they protect you and protect your partner, but do you really need a condom when you’re having intercourse, or is it all just hype? Are the condom companies raking in millions for no reason or is wearing a condom really the smartest way to go?

Dear Dan And Jennifer,

I’ve heard a lot of people talk about condoms and some people say you don’t need them and that you can just pull out. What’s the truth – should I really wear a condom or is it all just rumor?

–Ted, California

Click here to view the embedded video.

Do I Need A Condom?

Yes! Condoms can help prevent pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases. While animal skin condoms are too porous to prevent STD’s, they’re still effective at preventing pregnancy and traditional latex and plastic condoms are even better. What if your partner is on birth control? Do you still need to wear a condom? Yes! Birth control is effective, but can be made less effective by taking it incorrectly, taking antibiotics or being ill. When coupling condoms with birth control, you are doubly protecting you and your partner against pregnancy as well as preventing the spread and contraction of sexually transmitted diseases.

But I Don’t Like The Way It Feels

Just because a condom might decrease the sensitivity experienced during intercourse a little is no reason not to protect you and your partner. You can still have a lot of fun with condoms – especially flavored ones and those with warming lubricant – and still have a satisfying sex life while staying safe. For some men, condoms are an excellent way to help prevent premature ejaculation. If you tend to “go” too quickly, wearing a condom might help you last longer and some are even available with desensitizing gel or cream that will help you to keep from ejaculating too quickly.

But I’m Embarrassed To Buy Them

Don’t be! If you’re buying condoms, it means you’re having sex. That’s a good thing, right? You can buy condoms at any drug store, supermarket or convenience store and they’re incredibly inexpensive. If you’d like more privacy while purchasing your condoms or would like a wider variety of condoms to choose from, there are many online stores that offer flavored, glow in the dark, colored and other types of condoms that you and your partner can really have a lot of fun with! If you purchase your condoms online, they’ll come to you in discreet packaging and no one will know but you! In reality though, there’s nothing wrong with purchasing condoms from your grocery store, a gas station or even online – it means that you’re being safe and you’re getting ready to have a great time.

All in all, it’s important to be safe – it’s always better being safe than sorry, right? Don’t have sex without a condom – you might be in your doctor’s office getting a positive result on an STD test or finding out that your partner is pregnant, wishing you would have simply put one on in the first place. Have fun with condoms and be safe, and don’t be afraid to experiment with condoms and make them a part of your sexual routine instead of a nuisance!

Can Masturbation Help Prevent Getting Erections At The Wrong Time? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 19:28:32 +0000

It’s every guy’s worst nightmare – having an erection at the wrong time, whether you’re in class, at the office or on a casual date with a girl you really like.

Having an erection at the wrong time can be embarrassing and it can be even more embarrassing and frustrating trying to hide it. Can masturbating often or at the right times help prevent unwanted erections?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Do you know if it is a common occurrence for a guy to masturbate not so much for the direct pleasure (although it is nice) but to not have any "urges"? I often masturbate so I won’t get them at the "wrong" times. Is that a common occurrence?

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Erections are a natural thing!

An erection for a man is his body’s way of letting him know that there’s tension there,sexual or not, that needs to be relieved. It signals arousal but there are times where a man can get an erection and he’s not thinking about sex nor is he aroused at all.

An erection is simply when extra blood flows to the penis, making it stiffer instead of more relaxed. This can happen often and it is known for happening at some of the most inopportune times.

Masturbating to relieve tension.

Almost every man (if not every man) masturbates at some time or another. Many men masturbate often, especially if they’re not sexually active, while some masturbate less.

However often a man needs to masturbate is generally considered healthy, with the exception of often forgoing sexual intercourse with your partner in lieu of masturbation or masturbating to the point of physical harm.

Masturbating helps to relieve tension and yes, it can help to prevent erections at the wrong time.

When to masturbate?

Many men masturbate in the mornings before a day at the office so they can put the focus on their work, while others prefer to masturbate less often. If you want to use masturbation as a means to prevent unwanted erections, try going without masturbation for a few days and note when your erections seem to happen.

Do they happen at a certain time or when you see a certain person? Learn your triggers. There may be more than a few and sometimes it can be hard to figure out what the triggers are, but it’s helpful to have at least a little background knowledge on when you seem to get unwanted erections before you use masturbation as a tool to prevent them.

Use your triggers to prevent unwanted erections.

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Going Solo… Self Empowerment Through Masturbation

Maya Silverman — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 19:03:54 +0000

The dirty word of the sexual world, masturbation conjures up images of old men, nuns, and cucumbers. But much like reality TV, we all indulge in it, but no one likes to admit how much they enjoy it,

People often assume that Tantra, Tantric Sex, Erotic and Sensual Massage all require a partner.

A partner is good, however anyone can reap the benefits, and by going solo you are in a unique position to really explore yourself, discover what turns you on , and to nurture yourself in any way that your mind, body and soul desire.

So dim the lights, put on the music, get the oils out, and give yourself a hand. It’s time to celebrate a bit of quality ME time:

Masturbation and Empowerment

For the ladies out there – the majority of women self-love lying down on their backs, however why not add some variety and intrigue ? Stand up, do it before a luxurious candle lit bath, out doors (if you have privacy), any place that feels harmonious, relaxed and safe.

Create a sensual and inviting mood. You are loving yourself so don’t hold back on preparation. You are taking the time to honor yourself and this takes as much time, preparation and focus as if with a lover.

Let Go of Old Limiting Beliefs

Some women aren’t comfortable touching and pleasing themselves and the thought of self loving creates resistance. Why not let go your old beliefs, pain, and frustration. Use this time to honor your self, your femininity, your body. Give yourself all the love, attention and pleasure that you really want.

Put on some comfortable yet inviting clothing, breathe deeply and slowly to relax your mind and body. A more relaxed mind and body equals stronger more pleasurable and intense orgasms. So always take the time to unwind, de-stress and shut out the world.

Tease, Explore and Arouse

Tease, explore and gently arouse and awaken your female goddess by touching and stroking your body avoiding the intimate areas for at least 20–30 minutes. Stroke your legs, inner thighs, hands, feet, lightly brush over your breasts. Feel your sexual energy pulsating throughout your whole body, increasing in intensity the more attention and focus you lavish on your self.

When you feel your whole body tingling, apply soft sensual touchs to the breasts, gently stoke your yoni, lips, clitoris (but don’t apply to much pressure directly on the head at this point). Explore how each area feels to your touch, explore the texture and sensations of each area, gently insert one finger into the yoni, about 2 inches within, and move in and out.

Finding Your G-Spot

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eXtreme Sex Ed: How Do I Talk To My Husband About Sex? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 01:42:27 +0000

When learning about your partner’s body and your own body and how they work together during sexual intercourse or other sexual activity, you might run into a few roadblocks along the way.

You might find it difficult to bring up the subject of how you like a certain thing or what feels good and what doesn’t.

How can you talk to your partner and help them to learn what you like and don’t like in bed?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Sometimes I feel like my husband doesn’t know what the hell he’s doing. I find it hard to talk to him about this stuff, the sex and things like condoms and lube, how do I talk to him?

– Scarlett, NJ

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Learn yourself first.

The first step to being able to tell your partner where to go when pleasuring you is to first learn where you’re going. This often happens during masturbation. Learn what spots are sensitive and how you like to be touched, as well as what doesn’t work for you. Once you’re comfortable with your own body, you can help your partner learn where to go.

The Fragile Male Ego

Telling your partner how you like to be touched sexually, especially if he’s not doing it that way, can be intimidating and rightly so. Men have fragile egos that are easily damaged, especially when it comes to their sexual skills.

Trying to talk to your partner about these things can easily cause the words to die right in your throat, getting you nowhere, because you’re afraid to hurt his feelings. It’s good to be a little scared, because you can hurt your partner’s feelings if you want to tell him that you like to be touched in a way that he’s not touching you.

You can easily make him feel inadequate or even useless in the bedroom. Does that mean you have to shy away from the conversation at all and stop enjoying sex with your partner just to save his feelings? No! It’s all in how you go about it.

Don’t Criticize

Being critical when making suggestions about your partner’s sexual performance is the number one thing that will upset him and bruise his ego. It’s very important not to be critical at all, instead, be supportive.

Don’t tell your partner what he’s doing wrong, suggest to him something else to do instead. When he does hit the right spot, make sure he knows it! Be vocal, thank him and definitely return the favor. Many women make the mistake of never changing their vocal suggestions or their body language, regardless of what feels good and what doesn’t.

Give your partner a chance to learn what you like and what you don’t based on your reactions.He will learn to tell the difference between a mild "ooh" and an "OOOH!" He’ll want to continue doing the things that elicit the most reaction from you, and you’ll want him to!

Make it Fun

If you want to talk to your partner about toys, lubes and other things related to sex but are afraid to, make it a little bit fun. Go shopping for these things together, or browse them online from the comfort of your home.

Point out things that you like and ask him to show you what he likes. You can learn a lot from each other this way! Combine that with positive suggestions on which of his moves feel good and which don’t and you’ll both soon be rocking each other’s world!

eXtreme Sex Ed: Help! I Feel Like A Spectator During Sex! (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 19:12:37 +0000

If you’re new at sex or are just new to your partner, it might be difficult for you to get "into" your partner.

Things might seem awkward at first and it can be frustration to experience sexual intimacy with your partner without being really "into" it. How can you get more into your partner and more into sex with them?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I want to tell my bf what I like in bed, but I don’t know how, because I don’t masturbate? (That’s right! – remember from before Scarlett is a pastor’s kid…) I feel like a spectator during sex. I find it hard to relax and I don’t think I’ve ever had an orgasm. Please help.

–Scarlett, NJ

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Finding Out What You Want

For you to get "into" sex, it’s important for you to experiment with what turns you on. If you don’t know what turns you on and what gets you excited, it’s hard not to feel like a spectator when you’re actually doing the deed. How do you do that? One of the greatest ways to experiment with what you like is to masturbate.

Use your hands, a detachable shower head or even toys to find out what feels the best. You can masturbate with your partner if you prefer, or you can masturbate alone to really try new things and find out what really gets you going.

It’s difficult to get into sex and share with your partner what you like without first knowing yourself.

Get Into The Game

One of the best ways to find out what you like during sex and really get into it is to just dive in and do it! Spend time experimenting with different techniques, including genital massage, oral sex and sexual intercourse.

You might like simultaneous oral sex or you might really enjoy your partner using their hands on you.

You’ll never know though if you don’t try! Have sex with your partner and make mental notes of what you don’t like and what you really don’t want to try again. Next time, try something new.

Continue to do this until you find a few things that you really enjoy doing with your partner. Make a mental note of these and when you’re feeling turned on, you and your partner can use these things to get you really excited and into it.

Make sure both partners get equal satisfaction. It’s easy for a woman to feel like a spectator during sex if the focus is on the man. Share each other equally and take turns pleasuring each other until you build up to an amazing climax!

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Should I Really Be Worried About STDs? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Thu, 21 Aug 2008 13:02:15 +0000

When it comes to sexual activity, it can sometimes be confusing as to what can transmit sexually transmitted diseases and what can’t. What types of STD’s can be contracted during which kinds of sexual activity and when are you completely safe?

If you have oral sex can you common STDs like Gonorrhea, Chlamydia, or Herpes?

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Sexual Activity and STD’s.

There’s a reason they’re called "sexually transmitted diseases." You can contract them through virtually any type of sexual activity, including oral sex, anal sex, and vaginal intercourse.

Some sexually transmitted diseases, such as AIDS, HIV and Hepatitis C can be transmitted via blood to blood contact such as receiving a tattoo or piercing with a needle that isn’t sterile. When you have sexual contact or blood to blood contact with someone, you put yourself at risk for contracting or spreading a sexually transmitted disease. How can you protect yourself?

HIV, AIDS and Hepatitis C

HIV, AIDS and Hepatitis C can be spread via blood to blood contact or through vaginal and penile secretions. This includes semen and pre-ejaculation secretions.

The best way to protect yourself against these types of STD’s is to use condoms and dental dams while having oral sex, anal sex and vaginal intercourse, make sure any tattoo or piercing artist uses a sterilized needle and don’t use intravenous drugs.

Chlamydia, Gonorrhea, Syphilis and Other Infections

These types of sexually transmitted diseases are known as viral infections. They are spread by any sexual contact at all, but not through blood to blood contact.

While these are particularly unsavory STD’s, they are most often treated with an antibiotic regimen and can be cured. If left alone long enough, a Chlamydia, Gonorrhea or Syphilis infection can cause a great deal of other bodily damage, including muscle and brain damage, and more commonly sterility.

To protect against these types of sexually transmitted diseases, you should use a condom or a dental dam during any type of sexual activity. Oral sex should also be protected against because viral and bacterial STD’s can set up host in the mouth and throat.

Other Types Of STD’s

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