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Can Masturbation Help Prevent Getting Erections At The Wrong Time? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 27 Oct 2008 19:28:32 +0000

It’s every guy’s worst nightmare – having an erection at the wrong time, whether you’re in class, at the office or on a casual date with a girl you really like.

Having an erection at the wrong time can be embarrassing and it can be even more embarrassing and frustrating trying to hide it. Can masturbating often or at the right times help prevent unwanted erections?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Do you know if it is a common occurrence for a guy to masturbate not so much for the direct pleasure (although it is nice) but to not have any "urges"? I often masturbate so I won’t get them at the "wrong" times. Is that a common occurrence?

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Erections are a natural thing!

An erection for a man is his body’s way of letting him know that there’s tension there,sexual or not, that needs to be relieved. It signals arousal but there are times where a man can get an erection and he’s not thinking about sex nor is he aroused at all.

An erection is simply when extra blood flows to the penis, making it stiffer instead of more relaxed. This can happen often and it is known for happening at some of the most inopportune times.

Masturbating to relieve tension.

Almost every man (if not every man) masturbates at some time or another. Many men masturbate often, especially if they’re not sexually active, while some masturbate less.

However often a man needs to masturbate is generally considered healthy, with the exception of often forgoing sexual intercourse with your partner in lieu of masturbation or masturbating to the point of physical harm.

Masturbating helps to relieve tension and yes, it can help to prevent erections at the wrong time.

When to masturbate?

Many men masturbate in the mornings before a day at the office so they can put the focus on their work, while others prefer to masturbate less often. If you want to use masturbation as a means to prevent unwanted erections, try going without masturbation for a few days and note when your erections seem to happen.

Do they happen at a certain time or when you see a certain person? Learn your triggers. There may be more than a few and sometimes it can be hard to figure out what the triggers are, but it’s helpful to have at least a little background knowledge on when you seem to get unwanted erections before you use masturbation as a tool to prevent them.

Use your triggers to prevent unwanted erections.

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Going Solo… Self Empowerment Through Masturbation

Maya Silverman — Fri, 24 Oct 2008 19:03:54 +0000

The dirty word of the sexual world, masturbation conjures up images of old men, nuns, and cucumbers. But much like reality TV, we all indulge in it, but no one likes to admit how much they enjoy it,

People often assume that Tantra, Tantric Sex, Erotic and Sensual Massage all require a partner.

A partner is good, however anyone can reap the benefits, and by going solo you are in a unique position to really explore yourself, discover what turns you on , and to nurture yourself in any way that your mind, body and soul desire.

So dim the lights, put on the music, get the oils out, and give yourself a hand. It’s time to celebrate a bit of quality ME time:

Masturbation and Empowerment

For the ladies out there – the majority of women self-love lying down on their backs, however why not add some variety and intrigue ? Stand up, do it before a luxurious candle lit bath, out doors (if you have privacy), any place that feels harmonious, relaxed and safe.

Create a sensual and inviting mood. You are loving yourself so don’t hold back on preparation. You are taking the time to honor yourself and this takes as much time, preparation and focus as if with a lover.

Let Go of Old Limiting Beliefs

Some women aren’t comfortable touching and pleasing themselves and the thought of self loving creates resistance. Why not let go your old beliefs, pain, and frustration. Use this time to honor your self, your femininity, your body. Give yourself all the love, attention and pleasure that you really want.

Put on some comfortable yet inviting clothing, breathe deeply and slowly to relax your mind and body. A more relaxed mind and body equals stronger more pleasurable and intense orgasms. So always take the time to unwind, de-stress and shut out the world.

Tease, Explore and Arouse

Tease, explore and gently arouse and awaken your female goddess by touching and stroking your body avoiding the intimate areas for at least 20–30 minutes. Stroke your legs, inner thighs, hands, feet, lightly brush over your breasts. Feel your sexual energy pulsating throughout your whole body, increasing in intensity the more attention and focus you lavish on your self.

When you feel your whole body tingling, apply soft sensual touchs to the breasts, gently stoke your yoni, lips, clitoris (but don’t apply to much pressure directly on the head at this point). Explore how each area feels to your touch, explore the texture and sensations of each area, gently insert one finger into the yoni, about 2 inches within, and move in and out.

Finding Your G-Spot

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eXtreme Sex Ed: How Do I Talk To My Husband About Sex? (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Mon, 06 Oct 2008 01:42:27 +0000

When learning about your partner’s body and your own body and how they work together during sexual intercourse or other sexual activity, you might run into a few roadblocks along the way.

You might find it difficult to bring up the subject of how you like a certain thing or what feels good and what doesn’t.

How can you talk to your partner and help them to learn what you like and don’t like in bed?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

Sometimes I feel like my husband doesn’t know what the hell he’s doing. I find it hard to talk to him about this stuff, the sex and things like condoms and lube, how do I talk to him?

– Scarlett, NJ

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Learn yourself first.

The first step to being able to tell your partner where to go when pleasuring you is to first learn where you’re going. This often happens during masturbation. Learn what spots are sensitive and how you like to be touched, as well as what doesn’t work for you. Once you’re comfortable with your own body, you can help your partner learn where to go.

The Fragile Male Ego

Telling your partner how you like to be touched sexually, especially if he’s not doing it that way, can be intimidating and rightly so. Men have fragile egos that are easily damaged, especially when it comes to their sexual skills.

Trying to talk to your partner about these things can easily cause the words to die right in your throat, getting you nowhere, because you’re afraid to hurt his feelings. It’s good to be a little scared, because you can hurt your partner’s feelings if you want to tell him that you like to be touched in a way that he’s not touching you.

You can easily make him feel inadequate or even useless in the bedroom. Does that mean you have to shy away from the conversation at all and stop enjoying sex with your partner just to save his feelings? No! It’s all in how you go about it.

Don’t Criticize

Being critical when making suggestions about your partner’s sexual performance is the number one thing that will upset him and bruise his ego. It’s very important not to be critical at all, instead, be supportive.

Don’t tell your partner what he’s doing wrong, suggest to him something else to do instead. When he does hit the right spot, make sure he knows it! Be vocal, thank him and definitely return the favor. Many women make the mistake of never changing their vocal suggestions or their body language, regardless of what feels good and what doesn’t.

Give your partner a chance to learn what you like and what you don’t based on your reactions.He will learn to tell the difference between a mild "ooh" and an "OOOH!" He’ll want to continue doing the things that elicit the most reaction from you, and you’ll want him to!

Make it Fun

If you want to talk to your partner about toys, lubes and other things related to sex but are afraid to, make it a little bit fun. Go shopping for these things together, or browse them online from the comfort of your home.

Point out things that you like and ask him to show you what he likes. You can learn a lot from each other this way! Combine that with positive suggestions on which of his moves feel good and which don’t and you’ll both soon be rocking each other’s world!

eXtreme Sex Ed: Help! I Feel Like A Spectator During Sex! (Video)

Dan and Jennifer — Sat, 27 Sep 2008 19:12:37 +0000

If you’re new at sex or are just new to your partner, it might be difficult for you to get "into" your partner.

Things might seem awkward at first and it can be frustration to experience sexual intimacy with your partner without being really "into" it. How can you get more into your partner and more into sex with them?

Dear Dan and Jennifer,

I want to tell my bf what I like in bed, but I don’t know how, because I don’t masturbate? (That’s right! – remember from before Scarlett is a pastor’s kid…) I feel like a spectator during sex. I find it hard to relax and I don’t think I’ve ever had an orgasm. Please help.

–Scarlett, NJ

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Finding Out What You Want

For you to get "into" sex, it’s important for you to experiment with what turns you on. If you don’t know what turns you on and what gets you excited, it’s hard not to feel like a spectator when you’re actually doing the deed. How do you do that? One of the greatest ways to experiment with what you like is to masturbate.

Use your hands, a detachable shower head or even toys to find out what feels the best. You can masturbate with your partner if you prefer, or you can masturbate alone to really try new things and find out what really gets you going.

It’s difficult to get into sex and share with your partner what you like without first knowing yourself.

Get Into The Game

One of the best ways to find out what you like during sex and really get into it is to just dive in and do it! Spend time experimenting with different techniques, including genital massage, oral sex and sexual intercourse.

You might like simultaneous oral sex or you might really enjoy your partner using their hands on you.

You’ll never know though if you don’t try! Have sex with your partner and make mental notes of what you don’t like and what you really don’t want to try again. Next time, try something new.

Continue to do this until you find a few things that you really enjoy doing with your partner. Make a mental note of these and when you’re feeling turned on, you and your partner can use these things to get you really excited and into it.

Make sure both partners get equal satisfaction. It’s easy for a woman to feel like a spectator during sex if the focus is on the man. Share each other equally and take turns pleasuring each other until you build up to an amazing climax!

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Parents. You ARE The Sex Ed Teacher.

Christ Pro Erotic — Sun, 15 Jun 2008 16:17:15 +0000

When was the last time you saw something on your Blackberry of a friend of yours was “sexting” in a photo they’ve sent you? Don’t know what I’m talking about?

Good. I didn’t until hearing the terms passed around lately in the news and around young people.

According to the Urban Dictionary.com (a must for parents/adults alike), sexting is defined as “v: the act of text messaging someone in the hopes of having a sexual encounter with them later; initially casual, transitioning into highly suggestive and even sexually explicit.”

Your teen knows what it means

And yes, if you think your pre-teen or teenager is not up to this term, think again.

I think for all the sexual freedom talk, it’s hard to judge what is the right course of action to take when your pre-teen or teenager is acting out something which should be left in the bedroom. It’s even harder today when our kids are more astute with the latest technology than any of us were 10 or 20 years ago.

From cell phones to text messaging to YouTube and Facebook , kids and teens show an ability to master the latest gizmo available on the market. They take it, use it, and create it to be their own identity; they make their homepages and profiles incredibly savvy even for the novice user.

The danger for young people

The danger is many young people are knowledgeable about sexual terms and how to do them, but not have the knowledge to be responsible to themselves and others.

Meanwhile, parents are left in the dust.

Many adults with kids get their children these devices, or give them unlimited time on the computer unaware of how far down the rabbit hole they can go. Your kids can be in their room or at school for hours, with parents not knowing what is on their cell phone, their personal page, or God knows what else. So how do sexually hip parental units find a balance between allowing your kids freedom to grow?

Simple. Be parental. Mom, Dad…Engage!

Getting to know what your children are doing means you may need to get as technically savvy as your kids. It may be as simple as having a sit down chat with your kids. It may mean you will have to confiscate their cell phones or computer to check out what they have on them.

Be a parent; not a friend

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