Ask Dan and Jennifer » tantra

How To Give A Terrific Breast Massage

Maya Silverman — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 17:00:04 +0000

The eternal fascination for most men, and indeed many women, the breasts, can be an incredibly neglected and forgotten area in the realm of Tantric pleasure and touch.

Think about it. If you’re a man reading this, how much time do you lavish on her breasts?

Do You Have Tunnel Vision With Women’s Breasts?

The ‘Tunnel Vision’ approach assumes that a woman’s breasts are always ripe and ready for a bit of manual molding. Nothing could be further from the truth. The breasts and its many parts are very sensitive, and only a lover with a slow hand can truly appreciate them in full majestic glory.

Structurally they are made up of fibrous connective tissue and a layer of fat tissue. They are rich in blood and lymph vessels, hence the importance of massage in maintaining good circulatory flow of blood, lymph (tissue fluid) and sexual energy.

Perhaps more importantly the breasts are symbolic of a woman’s emotional center, healing and nurturing. By neglecting these lovelies, you fail to acknowledge an incredibly important part of the feminine mystique.

The Kama Sutra On Foreplay And Breast Plat

The Kama Sutra refers to the importance of foreplay and breast play:

“Ardent young men, do not neglect the preliminaries! Endeavor to satisfy your mistress. Listen to her desires. Some men, carried away by the power of their desire, forget the prelude, only to be surprised when they are pushed away later! Yet it is such a delight to kiss, to caress, to nibble one another…

To explore with your hand or your mouth her body, her breasts, her neck, her belly, down to her innermost curves. Fulfilled, the beloved shall return these kisses and caresses wholeheartedly. No part of the beloved’s body should be neglected. Her lover shall make it his duty to discover them, to reveal to his mistress all the pleasure she can receive from them.”

Tantric breast massage is an incredible gift with which to lavish unbridled attention on your lover. Pleasure, better circulation, toning, and nurturing are all aspects of the massage.

The Kama Sutra mentions key areas on the female body sensitive to kissing:

neck
forehead
cheeks
eyes
breasts
lips
palate inside the mouth (not sure how this works!)

Prepare Your Sensual Environment

Prepare your sensual environment with soothing music, dimmed lighting, perfumed candles and make sure the room is warm and visually inviting. Introduce items of spiritual or personal significance such as flowers, favorite nibbles, a photo – whatever works for you and your lover.

Begin by covering your lover with a sheet or towel so that she does not get cold. Rest one hand on her heart and the other on her yoni and visualize warm heart energy moving from your heart into your hands and down towards your lover’s heart and yoni. This is a very relaxing, healing, connecting and balancing visualization to use before launching into the breast massage.

Beginning the Breast Massage

Multiple Orgasms – Did You Know That It IS Possible For Men Too?

Carla Tara — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 13:15:36 +0000

Tantra is such a vast subject that it’s fascinating and awe-inspiring. It includes so much that it can be very confusing to the beginning student. Tantra is an art, a science, a way of life that is honest and courageous. It includes and faces squarely our sexual energy, this awesome force that some religions fear and want to suppress.

It can be used to help us reach our highest potential of pleasure, and union with the divine. To achieve this, it offers a series of exercises in breathing, tone vibrations, the use of certain muscles, and concentration on certain symbols representing the energy centers of the body.

One of the techniques it teaches allows men to have an orgasm without ejaculating, which makes it possible for him to come again and again.

How is This Possible?

Well, by using tantric principles, such as breathing, visualizing, and squeezing the love muscles to draw sexual energy from the sex organs up the spine to the back of the brain, a man can learn to ride the waves of orgasm and start coasting along the crest of those waves like a skilled surfer.

He can go down in the valley of the wave and enjoy playing more safely in a sweet and intensive romantic/spiritual space, absorbing the benefits resulting from the heightened pleasure he just achieved. He feels as if he’s buzzing with energy, more open and tender toward his partner and himself.

They can look into each other’s eyes, exchange gentle caresses, or simply breathe together to expand the state of bliss. All this can be done without the man losing the precious life-force contained in his semen.

Then the couple can proceed to make love actively, and reach several peaks in one love session. After having reached several peaks and experienced several body orgasms, the man can choose to have an ejaculatory orgasm if desired.

Controlling Ejaculation

How quickly a man can learn to control his ejaculation response depends on how much he practices, and the attitude he practices with. It’s almost a paradox: The more patient and loving you are with yourself, the less in a hurry to achieve quick results, the faster you’ll learn.

That’s because relaxation is the key, and you can’t be relaxed if you’re very goal-oriented. When you’re goal-oriented, you’re tense and usually judgmental. Ideas like, "I don’t know if I’ll ever learn this stuff…..Perhaps it’s not for me….I’m wasting my time…." or similar discouraging thoughts will retard the process of learning.

Be Positive and Loving

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Did You Know That Tantra Can Help Sexual Dysfunction?

Carla Tara — Sun, 12 Oct 2008 14:55:12 +0000

There is a certain embarrassment or even shame that is connected with sexual dysfunctions. No one would be ashamed to have, for example, a liver or heart dysfunction.

One would be sad but not embarrassed and one would immediately ask a professional for help.

Common Sexual Dysfunction

The most common sexual dysfunctions that men experience are: loss of desire, erectile dysfunctions, premature ejaculation and impotence. Some women experience: inhibited sexual desire, lack of orgasm, insufficient lubrification and painful intercourse.

According to the Journal of the American Medical Association, in 2005 more than 105 million Americans have reported struggling with chronic sexual dysfunctions and many of them were not aware that there is help available. Diabetes can be one of the causes of sexual dysfunctions.

Also some prescription medications for depression can have a negative effect on sexual desire.

What Causes Sexual Dysfunction

There are many causes: some of them are related to hormone production, to blocks to the flow of energy, to shallow anxious breathing and unhealthy diet, just to mention a few.

The hormonal production tends to diminish with age, and you could consult a good endocrinologist to check your hormonal production status. There is a lot of information available on the internet. It’s worth learning about it.

There are also products available that are natural, organic, that very safely stimulate the body to increase production of the body’s natural growth hormones.

You Are What You Eat

What you eat and drink is also important. There are certain simple recommendations you might want to observe most of the time: eat your biggest meal between 12 and 2 PM; eat fish vegetables often; keep your stomach light at night; drink lots of water during the day. Drinking a little alcohol can help lower inhibitions, while drinking too much can inhibit sexuality.

Breathing Matters

Breathing shallowly and high in the chest is probably the most important single cause of lack of energy and anxiety during lovemaking. Through the years, we became habituated to breathe shallow breaths, often filling only the higher part of our chest where the lungs are narrow and smaller.

The body brings the venous blood to the lungs to be purified and the largest veins are located on the bottom of the lungs. Venous blood contains carbon dioxide and other poisonous gases that need to be exchanged with oxygen and thus transformed into vital arterial blood that nourished and strengthens the body.

To be fully present and energetic lovers, we need to learn to breathe to facilitate this exchange as fully as possible. Tantra teaches different breaths for different purposes. Some of the most used techniques are to increase energy and to retain energy without going over the top.

Sometimes It’s Emotional

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What is Tantra and Tantric Sex?

Carla Tara — Mon, 29 Sep 2008 19:22:35 +0000

Tantra is such a vast subject that it’s fascinating and awe-inspiring. It includes so much that it can be very confusing to the beginning student.

Tantra is an art, a science, a way of life that is honest and courageous. It includes and faces squarely our sexual energy, this awesome force that some religions fear and want to suppress. It can be used to help us reach our highest potential of pleasure, and union with the divine.

What Tantra Is and Isn’t

However, Tantra is not a religion. Tantra does not require anyone to follow any dogmas. Rather, it encourages us to discover through our own experience our true creative potential for pleasure, and our ability to connect with all the elements that surround us, and the spirit that we all share.

To achieve this, it offers a series of exercises in breathing, tone vibrations, the use of certain muscles, and concentration on certain symbols representing the energy centers of the body. This helps us clear blocks interfering with the movement of energy, and guides us into altered states of consciousness.

There we can transcend our everyday self-identification, and we can get a glimpse of our true larger reality. This includes the body, and goes beyond to include "all that is." It’s a state of great expansion and orgasmic pleasure that surpasses by far the short-lived ejaculatory orgasm that many are accustomed to.

Engaging in the Tantric Journey

There are many wonderful book on Tantra, and reading can open your mind up to Tantra, but in order to actually engage in the journey, I think the best way to start is with a good guide. Why do many people need a guide?

Some books can be confusing and no matter how well written they can never express the warmth and guidance of a real knowledgeable professional who can transmit her energy and knowledge to the seekers who are open to receive it.

Connect With and Clear Emotional Issues

If you want to prepare for a really high Tantric experience with each other, it is also essential to start by taking time to connect and catch up with emotional issues that might linger unexpressed. People often leave these issues unsaid because of some common rationalizations, such as “I don’t want to start a fight with her” or “he’s not ready to hear me.”

But when we leave these emotions hidden, they become a hindrance to the moving of erotic energy, and end up suppressing our passion for each other. Paying attention to each other and really listening to each other’s concerns is essential. Learning how to “make love grow” becomes especially imperative if you did not see good models for this process while growing up.

Making Love Tantrically

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How To Make Lovemaking a Real Love Making Experience With Touch

Carla Tara — Mon, 22 Sep 2008 19:24:28 +0000

People have forgotten the simplest lovemaking ‘technique’ of all: the incredible power of human touch. Even when the opportunity arises in lovemaking sessions for us to give and receive the pleasure of the caress, we tend to get caught up in the drive to ejaculatory orgasms.

Making Lovemaking a Real Love Making Experience

Admittedly, ejaculatory orgasms produce intense pleasure, but without the slow build up of conscious touch, it is more like a sneeze in the groin, just a release of tension, than a deeply satisfying experience that “makes love grow” (love making).

Unfortunately for many people, sex encounters become more mutual masturbation than real love building experiences.

Tantra invites us to take time to thoroughly touch each other to increase arousal across the entire body. Our skin is our biggest organ and needs caring love and attention. But the Tantric touch, the conscious touch, goes deeper than the skin.

Using Conscious Touch

“Conscious touch” means that you are not thinking of something else. Your attention is fully on your lover, how they breathe and how they take in your touch. Your conscious touch stirs up energy, opening up both the heart and the flow of sexual energy in the form of weak electronic waves that continue to build up until they become larger waves that encompass the entire body.

Sometimes we touch how we want to be touched instead of tuning in to see how our lover likes it. If you notice your lover caught up in their own thoughts, notice how you are touching them. Ask if they would like a softer or stronger, slower or faster touch. This will get their attention back, and you will get a chance to give them the touch they desire.

Touch is both sensuous and healing. The most obvious emissaries of love are our arms, and the focal points from which love flows are the palms. When we touch our loved ones, we help them heal from any pain or disappointment they experience during the day, and they feel that life is worth living just to be touched by you.

Connecting Your Intention With Your Breath

When you connect your intention to your breath, you will feel their muscles sucking in that attention, all the way down to the bones. Yes, bones need love and attention, too, and your intention connected with your breath is powerful enough to penetrate deeply.

Tantric people know that touching a lover does not have to end in ejaculation. Some women cringe when their men start touching them because they know it will end up in intercourse and they might not be in the mood.

I invite men to set up a “just touching time” with your beloved. Then, even when she gets excited you keep your agreement of “just touching” during that time. Doing this often, you build up trust in your word, and she will be touched with joy anytime you do so.

And I promise you that both of you will have an incredibly great time touching and making love.

To learn more about Carla Tara, visit www.1Tantra.com.

Taming The Tiger: Exploring Female Sexual Pleasure

Maya Silverman — Wed, 17 Sep 2008 19:19:01 +0000

Female sexuality has always been a source of mystery and power. Even during ancient times, philosophers and poets often devoted themselves to discovering the hidden secrets of female sexuality.

However, many of these exposed “secrets” painted female sexuality as something to be feared as opposed to celebrated.

The Sexuality of Women is a Mystery

Today, the sexuality of women is still a mysterious subject for many including females themselves! Thanks to the nearly impossible work schedules of our work lives and the hectic demands from our family and friends, women often leave their own sexuality on the back burner, choosing instead to put the needs of others before their own.

It’s not entirely a conscious choice, either, as many women feel more comfortable catering to the needs of their family, friends and lovers before paying attention to their own.

Modern Life Affects Women’s Sexuality

Modern life can also have a draining effect on female sexual power, as the daily stresses of our day-to-day schedules can not only have a negative effect on women’s emotional and mental well-being, but her sexual force as well.

Women, think about it this way: how many nights have you returned home from work or a social outing, only to reject the advances of your lover because you were too tired or stressed to even think about making love?

It’s easy to see that female sexuality is often adversely affected by modern life, as stress can prevent a woman’s sexuality from blossoming into the sheer sexual energy that it deserves to be.

It’s no surprise that female sexuality continues to remain an enigmatic puzzle! Yet if you’re looking to reclaim the power and beauty of your own sexuality, then look no further than Tantric text to reawaken the sexual tiger within!

When you think of Tantra, do you think of intense sack sessions full of mind-bending positions that seem nearly impossible? While many may limit their view of Tantra to this picture, Tantra is actually a way of channeling and controlling the sexual energy that courses through our bodies.

What is Tantra?

This method of achieving sexual nirvana actually originated with the Zami cult, a group of women who used Tantra as a way to celebrate the power and beauty of female sexuality. When Tantra merged with Hindu and Buddhist influences, it became the Tantra that we know of today, a celebratory blend of male and female pleasure, where two lovers can reach sexual nirvana by appreciating the power of each other’s sexual power and energy.

Yet female sexuality cannot be celebrated if women don’t take the time to release and explore their own sexual power. Want to celebrate your divine sexuality? Here’s how to battle the modern stresses that women face today in order to reclaim and release the tiger that is female sexuality!

Celebrating Women’s Divine Sexuality

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Tantric Massage: How to Give Your Partner the Ultimate Sexual Experience

Maya Silverman — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 13:53:42 +0000

Do you want to give your lover the ultimate experience in sheer pleasure? I’m not just talking about “oh, that feels good” kind of pleasure, either.

I’m talking about the kind of soulful, intense pleasure that will have your partner reaching the brink of sexual nirvana and seeing stars for days!

Not sure if this is possible? Or if it is, you need to be some kind of expert lover to do it? Well, put your doubts to rest, because there’s a type of method out there that will intensify your relationship both in and out of the bedroom, and it’s easy to do!

That’s right. I’m talking about the tantric massage.

What is Tantric Massage?

The tantric massage may sound complicated, but it’s actually not all that hard to accomplish. The tantric massage was developed centuries ago in Asia as a vital ritual that served to balance out a person’s physical and emotional energy, which eventually lead to healing, tranquility and the kind of sack sessions that would make Casanova jealous.

There’s also an additional bonus: tantric massage can free your lover’s mind from the stress of daily life and melt away tension, thus increasing your partner’s chances of achieving a bed-shattering orgasm.

While the actual practice taught in the tantras (the ancient texts from where Tantra comes from) can take a very long time to perfect – in fact, several followers of the practice have been at it for decades – there are a few tricks and tips that you can easily use tonight in order to give the kind of tantric massage that will have your lover purring with pleasure.

Set the Mood

First, before you can begin your tantric massage journey, you have to set the proper mood. You don’t have to sprinkle rose petals over your bed, but a few changes to your normal bedroom atmosphere will work wonders.

Dim the lights, light a few candles and play music that’s tranquil and soothing (try to avoid any music that has a rhythmic beat). If you normally make love on ordinary cotton sheets, try swapping them for a set with a luxurious thread count, or for a more affordable option, use sheets made from jersey material, which feel silky and smooth against bare skin.

Your lover will definitely appreciate the time you took to set the mood!

Grab the Massage Oil

Once you’ve set up your bedroom to max out your lover’s tantric experience, grab some massage oil, have your partner remove his or her clothing and lay face-down on the bed (if you don’t want oil on your sheets, place a towel between your lover and the bed).

Pour a few drops of oil in the palm of your hands and rub them together in order to properly warm the oil After all, nothing can break a sensual mood more than a few drops of too-cold oil!

Begin the Massage Gently

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